The film is surprisingly watchable for a direct to video entry in Seagalogy. The set pieces from the liquor store beatdown to the Russian mob-run mountain town all felt fun.
*Many years ago back in 1980 I was personally taught the Art of Aikido by Sensei Seagal.* *3 months and $2000 Dollars later, I obtained my 5th Degree Aikido Black Belt.* *One day as I walked home, I saw 4 big built bullies beating a frail old man.* *First though in my Aikido 5th Degree mind, was should or should I not get involved.* *I quickly decided to get involved and put all my skills into action.* *Then the 5 of us beat the crap out of that old loser.*
Honestly what separates you from a 5th degree from a 6th degree is that a 6th degree Black Belt would have patty slapped caked everyone and snatched every mf'ing birthday.
the only person who would downvote this video is maybe Steven Seagal himself (although part of me thinks he's the kinda guy who would think these reviews are praise...which in a way i guess they are...whoa, meta). genius review. great content.
Not gonna lie. This is easily one of the best entries in the massive library of Seagal DTV fare. It actually comes close to recapturing the magic of the Above the Law to Under Siege days. The pistol whipping scene is worth the price of admission alone.
This tiny little town certainly is a cultural melting pot. "He's wearing a tracksuit and he's not Russian?" Jeez; Steve and the 'special forces'. Always special forces. More like special needs forces. And what really amuses me about The Seagull's body doubles is that they're rarely doing stunts; just walking around, going down stairs, carrying bags, standing up, etc. So they're not exactly stuntmen; they're just doing things the rest of us do between getting out of bed and then getting back into bed, except they're wearing jet black wigs. I remember when I left the special forces. I was always getting called in for "one last job" which only I could do. It was a bloody nightmare; I was always cancelling plans.
Haha right?! The body doubles just do normal things, like standing up. Oh that's crazy you were in special forces! Thank you for everything you did! I'm sure there's not much you can talk about though
3:31 he looks like a bear driving a Fisher-Price toy car. Stealing the money and stuff...this is kind of a fresh version of the Seagal Hero because he doesn't go to extremes to show that he's 100% virtuous, that everyone admires him and the bad guys always totally deserve it...he just does what he does.
Breen should direct a Segal movie! Imagine Steven eating tuna fish out of the can, being a hacker with about 7 laptops and maybe being meta throughout the movie.
I was VERY uncomfortable during that scene where Seagal tells the kidnapped girl to calm down because she's been drugged. I'm 100% certain that isn't the first time he's said that to a woman...
@10:16 that was such a great episode of sunny. Lol So many body doubles..... Lol And that tropic thunder clip is one of the funniest scenes of any movie.
Boy I am late to this one. That jacket Seagal wears in the opening scene is badass. Nobody wears coats like Steven. Once again I am sad to say this is another Seagal vehicle I have never seen. I cut my Seagal ponytail off and have felt less powerful since. I think it's a prophetic sign I need to regrow it out.
Byron Mann was in a couple of great movies. "Corruptor", "Crying Freeman" and even more recent big budget titles like "Skyscraper" or "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." As always RedEye Reviews did a subpar job at doing his research.
It's as if Seagal's plan is to shame and destroy the film industry by flooding and overwhelming the selection of movies with SO MANY terrible films people will STOP watching movies. "I'm special forces, that's right, I went on SO MANY commando missions AND survived impossible odds of returning alive because I'm THAT ELITE! I was codenamed THE PACIFIER! Cause I just looked at guys and they surrendered."
The Sistine Chapel of Steven Seagal Movie Reviews. They're like Pringles, once I pop one on the screen I just CAN'T STOP... No, mommy, make the bad Steven Seagal movies stop... MAKE IT STOP! Hehe.
Can we take a moment to all appreciate what this contact creator is doing. He is taking the bullet for all of us so we don’t have to go insane watching them ourselves.
One more thing. I did some research and found out this is actually a horror movie. After seeing Steven Seagal, refrigerators everywhere were f’n terrified!
Ooooh ... What about a remake of Kindergarten Cop, where Seagal's an investigator from the Post Office, digging into mail theft? Character introduction: "He was One *Tough* M-Fing Postal Carrier. Walked the only 50 mile route the Post Office ever had. Never sat down. Could put flyers into mailboxes from around the corner. Dogs adored him. Kids put out cookies for him. Young women would stalk him."
1:52 As well as being mysteriously laminated, that letter is also not handwritten, if I’m not mistaken. I believe that’s a cursive-style font. That probably annoys me more than it should, but still.
@@RedEyeReviews To be fair, writing a Dear John letter using MS WordPad means "Holly" was really throwing some shade. Only Comic Sans could make it snarkier.
@@RedEyeReviews On second thought, a non-handwritten goodbye means Holly was kidnapped by some evil organization, but that scene came from another movie and no one cared enough to tell Seagal he had mixed up the scripts.
Steven Seagal is indeed a dangerous man...to an all you can eat buffet...heyooo Edit: I typed this comment at the start of the video..and then you made that joke...thats some scary shit Did you cut the line were the kid at the liquor store asked steven for his ID...because he couldn't tell he was over 21...shit I should write Seagal movies
OH DUDE THAT’S RYU FROM STREET FIGHTER THE MOVIE! The Asian guy you mention’d is in alot of Seagal movies I sware that’s Ryu’…supporting actor to Ken aka Meeklo from Blood in Blood Out!
In the scene where you were talking about the guy who you thought was a big actor, he and the other dude were in The Expanse. Admiral Augusto Nguyễn and Prax Meng I think
11:07 I did a bit of research and it turns out that Seagal needed to have a stunt double perform in this part as it was around this time that the delivery driver showed up. Also I hear that is his favourite choice in porn, ie the ones where the pizza delivery guy shows up. Most of use fantasise about being the delivery guy, whereas he just fantasises about being the one left alone with the pizza.
By this point in his career, one could speculate that the only time Seagal would do his own stunts in fight scenes if he though the stuntman/men playing the villain(s) had cut in front of him at the catering table.
I don't understand all the hate for seagal. He has made so many movies.. So many action kicks ass cliches..... And people still overanalyse his. Movies...
you say that your glad she was drugged to cover up her bad acting i was thinking the exact same thing .Except drugging segal to cover up his bad acting and bad accents
I know I’m hella late. But…wait wait WAIT! Is this the ONE?? Is this the one movie where there’s no stripclub and he doesn’t smash some poor chick who’s 50 yrs his junior? Also, no tac gear! What is going on?! Wow…I’m almost speechless. Almost. Movies are still garbage. Awesome garbage.
dude i bet you anything that the kid in the liquor store replaced the underware model in true justice no i just google them both they really look alike
One of the deadliest jobs in film is being Steven Seagal's wife
It really really is
😭😭☠️
Not exactly great in real life, either.
The film is surprisingly watchable for a direct to video entry in Seagalogy. The set pieces from the liquor store beatdown to the Russian mob-run mountain town all felt fun.
Oh I agree. It was a fairly watchable movie and Seagal gave a pretty solid performance I think.
*Many years ago back in 1980 I was personally taught the Art of Aikido by Sensei Seagal.*
*3 months and $2000 Dollars later, I obtained my 5th Degree Aikido Black Belt.*
*One day as I walked home, I saw 4 big built bullies beating a frail old man.*
*First though in my Aikido 5th Degree mind, was should or should I not get involved.*
*I quickly decided to get involved and put all my skills into action.*
*Then the 5 of us beat the crap out of that old loser.*
Honestly what separates you from a 5th degree from a 6th degree is that a 6th degree Black Belt would have patty slapped caked everyone and snatched every mf'ing birthday.
Brilliant
the only person who would downvote this video is maybe Steven Seagal himself (although part of me thinks he's the kinda guy who would think these reviews are praise...which in a way i guess they are...whoa, meta). genius review. great content.
Haha thank you kind sir. I assume every downvote is someone who knows Steven. Or Steven himself on multiple accounts.
Not gonna lie. This is easily one of the best entries in the massive library of Seagal DTV fare. It actually comes close to recapturing the magic of the Above the Law to Under Siege days. The pistol whipping scene is worth the price of admission alone.
Oh for sure it was very watchable. You can see he actually put real effort into it. And did a good chunk of his own scenes and action
DTV? Diss TV? 😂
This tiny little town certainly is a cultural melting pot. "He's wearing a tracksuit and he's not Russian?"
Jeez; Steve and the 'special forces'. Always special forces. More like special needs forces.
And what really amuses me about The Seagull's body doubles is that they're rarely doing stunts; just walking around, going down stairs, carrying bags, standing up, etc. So they're not exactly stuntmen; they're just doing things the rest of us do between getting out of bed and then getting back into bed, except they're wearing jet black wigs.
I remember when I left the special forces. I was always getting called in for "one last job" which only I could do. It was a bloody nightmare; I was always cancelling plans.
Haha right?! The body doubles just do normal things, like standing up.
Oh that's crazy you were in special forces!
Thank you for everything you did! I'm sure there's not much you can talk about though
3:31 he looks like a bear driving a Fisher-Price toy car.
Stealing the money and stuff...this is kind of a fresh version of the Seagal Hero because he doesn't go to extremes to show that he's 100% virtuous, that everyone admires him and the bad guys always totally deserve it...he just does what he does.
Haha that bear imagery is hilarious. But yeah! He is sort of anti-hero. And it made me like him more
Can't watch the movies but I enjoy these reviews
He's A Dangerous Man, A Good Man, A Crazy Man
No human alive could take Seagal in a game of Pattycake, his handslap game is on point
The moment I saw it I knew I had to drop everything to watch this vid.!
Haha why thank you very much
one of your funniest yet--10 out of 10 truly excellent comedy!
Why thank you so much Seth!
Seagal is a god among men and we live in his world.
He actually convinced a high ranking Buddhist that he's a reincarnation of a Buddhist monk
I completely agree. I am routinely blown away by his command of the screen.
Seagull is a dog amongst real men and he is also a turd.
Edit: I take that back, that's an insult to dogs. And seagulls.
I watched that at the release and I found it solid, but maybe I was wrong 😅 The body doubles are hilarious. And I love your Seagal impression 😂
12:29 - "You inadvertently stepped into my MINDfield." He definitely said MIND-field. Does he even know what a minefield is?
I love these videos bud. You point out the ridiculousness so well!
Thank you so much!
Breen should direct a Segal movie! Imagine Steven eating tuna fish out of the can, being a hacker with about 7 laptops and maybe being meta throughout the movie.
I was VERY uncomfortable during that scene where Seagal tells the kidnapped girl to calm down because she's been drugged. I'm 100% certain that isn't the first time he's said that to a woman...
Loved the fellowship of the ring moment 🤣
And you got my brhdgfjsbhh
Lol. Not gonna lie it took me like 10 tries to day it without laughing.
"You have my ex!"
"Your axe?"
"No! You have my ex. Take her, please!"
@10:16 that was such a great episode of sunny. Lol
So many body doubles..... Lol
And that tropic thunder clip is one of the funniest scenes of any movie.
11:48 ... You need to do more dubs like this. Brilliant.
totally- I replayed it and laughed for 10 min and then subscribed!
I cant understand how 22976 view and only 862 likes. Redeye Reviews is very talented.
Boy I am late to this one. That jacket Seagal wears in the opening scene is badass. Nobody wears coats like Steven. Once again I am sad to say this is another Seagal vehicle I have never seen. I cut my Seagal ponytail off and have felt less powerful since. I think it's a prophetic sign I need to regrow it out.
Oh man the ponytail has come off!? That must feel weird. How long did you have it?
@@RedEyeReviews Only about 6 months. So It was about the length of Seagal's in *Hard To Kill".
For a post 2000s seagal movie this one isnt that bad. Just found your channel awesome stuff
oh so seagal can't seem to fit in cause he's TOOOO FAAAT to go down stairs. 10:54
Seagal beating those two thugs after going to the c. store is hilarious! Also his double bodies is so obvious
The body doubles were real bad in this one
6:45 That's Ryu from Street Fighter. That might be why you recongnised him and thought he's a big time actor.
Oooooo that has to be why
Byron Mann
Byron Mann was in a couple of great movies. "Corruptor", "Crying Freeman" and even more recent big budget titles like "Skyscraper" or "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." As always RedEye Reviews did a subpar job at doing his research.
Sometimes Stabler and I read the playbook by the light of the jukebox, but when it was time to play on Sunday we were ready.
I think I’ve watch all your SS vid, just what I need when I need a laugh.
Keep it up, my good man.
Top banana 👍✌️😆☝️
I'm so glad you enjoy these :)
It's as if Seagal's plan is to shame and destroy the film industry by flooding and overwhelming the selection of movies with SO MANY terrible films people will STOP watching movies.
"I'm special forces, that's right, I went on SO MANY commando missions AND survived impossible odds of returning alive because I'm THAT ELITE! I was codenamed THE PACIFIER! Cause I just looked at guys and they surrendered."
There are a handful of things I love in life. One of them are reviews of shitty Steven Seagal films.
Lol well you are in a good place
11:42 is my favorite part. I kinda wanna see that version of the Lord of the rings. 🤣🤣🤣
I love that awful overdub of Seagals voice in the beginning. "I'm takin dis cAHHr Biitch..."
"A shitty fellowship of the ring" 😂
The Sistine Chapel of Steven Seagal Movie Reviews. They're like Pringles, once I pop one on the screen I just CAN'T STOP... No, mommy, make the bad Steven Seagal movies stop... MAKE IT STOP! Hehe.
"this kid looks like he's about to get punched"
That's exactly what he looks like 🤣🤣🤣🤣
He's so nervous
Welcome to the Gangsterville, Alaska!
It was somewhat watchable, but the I think the title was the best thing about it
Just think about this... there's an alternate universe where Seagal is an Academy-Award winning character actor.
Imagine that segal meeting ours
steven segal is so dangerous he literally had to be hugged by fbi agents while hysterically crying in fear lmfao you go steven
Can we take a moment to all appreciate what this contact creator is doing. He is taking the bullet for all of us so we don’t have to go insane watching them ourselves.
Just pass me the dynamite, I'll end it now. I'd have to take out a GoFundMe page, for all the money. I'll need for my therapist
Contact creator?
One more thing. I did some research and found out this is actually a horror movie. After seeing Steven Seagal, refrigerators everywhere were f’n terrified!
Lol baZing
You are FUNNY!!! Love it!!!
Thank you friend!
The B role commercial thing at 13:40 is Lake Louise, the hotel is Fairmont Chateau. Banff National Park, Canada :)
It is a super pretty resort...and hey if someone already filmed it. Why film it again?
@@RedEyeReviews Banff in general is very beautiful. The glacier lakes are very blue.
Here's a fun game, tell segal he can't play an special forces/ ex special forces character and watch him try and write a script 🤣
Ooooh ... What about a remake of Kindergarten Cop, where Seagal's an investigator from the Post Office, digging into mail theft?
Character introduction:
"He was One *Tough* M-Fing Postal Carrier. Walked the only 50 mile route the Post Office ever had. Never sat down. Could put flyers into mailboxes from around the corner. Dogs adored him. Kids put out cookies for him. Young women would stalk him."
@Larry West oh bro he would never do a script where he couldn't sit down lmfao
"Bake em away toys".
Oh,and subbed.
A dangerous man; that is the title of the movie and the description of Seagal at a buffet!
LOL!
this and Space Ice are comedy gold :)
Dude, he was in The Corruptors with Mark Wahlberg and Chow Yun Fat. He played the leader of the Fukinese Dragons. It's a great movie. 😁
That guy you were saying is only in Seagal movies actually played a huge part in the amazing Netflix show Altered Carbon.
1:52 As well as being mysteriously laminated, that letter is also not handwritten, if I’m not mistaken. I believe that’s a cursive-style font. That probably annoys me more than it should, but still.
You are probably correct. Lol that's just lazy
@@RedEyeReviews To be fair, writing a Dear John letter using MS WordPad means "Holly" was really throwing some shade. Only Comic Sans could make it snarkier.
@@RedEyeReviews On second thought, a non-handwritten goodbye means Holly was kidnapped by some evil organization, but that scene came from another movie and no one cared enough to tell Seagal he had mixed up the scripts.
Steven Seagal is indeed a dangerous man...to an all you can eat buffet...heyooo
Edit: I typed this comment at the start of the video..and then you made that joke...thats some scary shit
Did you cut the line were the kid at the liquor store asked steven for his ID...because he couldn't tell he was over 21...shit I should write Seagal movies
Haha between the two of us we could write one great movie!
Lol, they totally would ask him for his ID And it would say he was 6'6" 220 lbs
@@RedEyeReviews and he would finish the scene by speaking "youth" with the cashier...i am not young anymore but maybe something like "rad" or "farout"
the body doubles are the best 🤣🤣
OH DUDE THAT’S RYU FROM STREET FIGHTER THE MOVIE! The Asian guy you mention’d is in alot of Seagal movies I sware that’s Ryu’…supporting actor to Ken aka Meeklo from Blood in Blood Out!
I have to rewatch Street Fighter now. He looks super familiar but I really couldn't figure it out lol
In the scene where you were talking about the guy who you thought was a big actor, he and the other dude were in The Expanse. Admiral Augusto Nguyễn and Prax Meng I think
Ooooo that'd probably why he looks so familiar to me
That girls acting and Steven Seagal's acting are perfect for a Razzie.
Also isn't that the monk that came out in the other Steven Seagal movie?
I've only seen that Asian in one other thing
He did a pretty knock out job as Admiral Nguyen in the Expanse.
That end footage is literally the first 5 minutes of the shining
Honestly, if there was a LARPer village where you could run around like a Seagal character, I'd totally be there, dude. Maximum legit!
"Maximum legit" could easily be the title of his next masterpiece.
Byron Mann(the guy who is in Wu Assassin) was also in Street Fighter as Ryu.
4:00 Haha best joke in this is that cops actually face any consequences for bad behavior.
That guy was RYU from Street fighter !!
Good movie for a redeye review
He was on the street fighter
No wonder he seems familiar.
When you're finally caught up to present day, can you mish mash footage from previous Seagal movies to make a RedEye Review for Tinted Death?
Oh that is an amazing idea haha.. just make my own Seagal movies
steven is a good man
So wrong about police procedures, but fun video as always
ryu from street fighter 1994 has been in one other movie besides the 4 or 5 seagull movies you mentioned, he was also in street fighter 1994
Byron was in Street Fighter, but I guess that’s not exactly anyone’s proudest moment...
Lol that explains it better
RiffTrax just tackled this movie!!! I think you’d love it.
im here for the seagal lore
Bad guy = discount Gabriel Byrne
Lol yeah I can absolutely see it.
Wasn’t the “big time actor” in Altered Carbon for like 30 seconds?
11:07 I did a bit of research and it turns out that Seagal needed to have a stunt double perform in this part as it was around this time that the delivery driver showed up.
Also I hear that is his favourite choice in porn, ie the ones where the pizza delivery guy shows up. Most of use fantasise about being the delivery guy, whereas he just fantasises about being the one left alone with the pizza.
People talk about Neil breen and tommy wiseau being masters of film. Steven seagal has been doing it for 30 years.
By this point in his career, one could speculate that the only time Seagal would do his own stunts in fight scenes if he though the stuntman/men playing the villain(s) had cut in front of him at the catering table.
The only way Seagal could be dangerous, is if he falls on you.
Very dangerous
The guy at 6:48 is the main villain in The Man With Iron Fists, a pretty solid martial arts flick.
He's hammy as shit and great in it too.
That movie is hammy and crazy all over
He also collabed with Seagal in "Belly of the Beast" (2003) & "Absolution" (2015)
Byron Mann the fighting Monk is back!
Make fun of this movie all you want but I enjoyed it. Mindless fun
Oh I agree. I love all these movies. There's a real reason I watch them alot lol. I just also like to poke fun of them
Lol that interogation guy at the beginning sounds like Trump.😁
I don't understand all the hate for seagal. He has made so many movies.. So many action kicks ass cliches..... And people still overanalyse his. Movies...
For a second I thought it was Sharon lee.
Byron Mann isn't a BIG deal. Except he is in Street Fighter with Van Damme. Which impresses no one.
So who in the movie was the dangerous man?
A very good movie
His face says “Spalding” across it if you look real closely.
Seagal is Jack Reacher from the 99c store
7:04 he was Ryu in street fighter
Which kind of explains how he ended up doing Seagal movies.
you say that your glad she was drugged to cover up her bad acting i was thinking the exact same thing .Except drugging segal to cover up his bad acting and bad accents
Seagal would need ALOT of drugs for it to work on a man of his size.
1:36 the reason for the intros like that for each character is to copy the Guy Ritchie films
dude was ryu in the van dam street fighter
I think this movie should be called "A Morbidly Obese Man".
Okay, so, I know these movies are bad, but is it weird that I want to watch these movies for myself.. I dunno', maybe it's a bad idea. lol
Oh it's a bad idea but I am right there with you.
... He said he's been in the military for 15 years what he joined when he was 50?
Kroger brand Aaron Paul BWAAAAAAA! Subbed my man
Lol thank you!!
I know I’m hella late. But…wait wait WAIT! Is this the ONE?? Is this the one movie where there’s no stripclub and he doesn’t smash some poor chick who’s 50 yrs his junior? Also, no tac gear! What is going on?! Wow…I’m almost speechless. Almost. Movies are still garbage. Awesome garbage.
Right?!?! They just couldn't logically make his character do those things I guess lol. I am sure he tried to put it in the script.
Another bedtime story at the karatay corner
I guess they called it a dangerous man cause they couldn’t call it a slow man, or a fat man, or maybe a mumbling man
dude i bet you anything that the kid in the liquor store replaced the underware model in true justice no i just google them both they really look alike
Not once does Segal blink. 😳😳
Easter Island Moai at 2:24
Lol 5: 40