Steven Segal's Flight of Fury is so bad that he proves Santa exists, and then kills him in front of a preschool, all on a live stream that is automatically downloaded to every device which is connected to the Internet and then it plays on repeat until the device is unplugged.
@@bollockjohnson6156 You go to space ice's channel and just mash f5 all day? I swear you say the same thing on all his videos as soon as they come out. Guy's living rent free in your head 24/7
This movie is so bad that my father who abandoned me at 7 years old came back home to smash the TV on which I was watching it and then abandoned me again
Every Steven Seagal movie in a nutshell: -Steven Seagal is either former special forces or CIA -Everyone brags about how awesome Segal is -Steven Seagal’s character will be portrayed as a good guy while doing illegal things -Women that are significantly younger than him will be attracted to him -A plot that makes no sense -Steven Seagal using body doubles for anything -Steven Segal will also mumble his way through scenes -Steven Seagal is portrayed as an invincible badass that takes no damage during his fights Anything else I forget?
A benevolent gift for Space Ice to endlessly entertain us in an otherwise boring to death universe. As we all know, good movies are for kids. Mocking bad movies is far more interesting. At least for me.😅
He's too lazy to film a significant part of the movie so there's always one or more characters who basically carry the plot for him (e.g. nose picky here doing most of the climax).
introducing: the awesome Rambo like dude who does all the movie for seagul but sadly kamikase himself at the end, so the former takes all the credits and women.
Steven Seagal is truly inspirational! He has never let his complete lack of talent or ability as an actor, storyteller and filmmaker stand in the way of his dream of becoming an actor, storyteller and filmmaker.
It was in fact a well known bug used by speed runners. If go under the truck and push yourself close enough to the underside, the game doesn't understand if you're under the truck or inside, so it pops you on top of it.
One of his movies supposedly took 28 days to make, so if that's correct you've likely got 6 or 7 and more by now, and more to come later if he keeps making movies.
@@Manglet762 that’s no surprise. Going by how shit they are the only time they would take a second cut is if when something actually cool happens accidentally the first time.
Ra'virr the trader just admit your really seagal and your using a pseudonym, there's no way on earth two people could be an ex seal/ranger stealth ass knife thrower fighter pilot.
Not only is this film a direct rip off of Black Thunder with Michael Dudikoff but In an interview on young actresses being pressured to perform nude, Ciera Payton said she had just turned 18 when she was cast in a lead role opposite Steven Seagal in this film. It was her first professional acting job, and filming would take place in Romania. But before accepting the role, neither the film's producers nor her agent showed her the film's full script. So it wasn't until halfway through her flight from the U.S. to Romania that she read the entire screenplay for the first time and discovered a scene in which a character comes out of the shower naked. She said she panicked when she realized it was her character. She would also be performing a sex scene with another woman. When she stepped off the plane, knowing no one else on set and without enough money to even place an international phone call, Payton decided to go straight to the top and approached Seagal in his trailer. After thanking him for the opportunity, she explained that she hadn't been informed about the expected nude scene, and she wasn't comfortable performing it. "He's kind of sitting there," said Payton, "and he's trying to think of what to say, and he goes, 'You won't even show your tits?'" The actor sent Payton outside and gathered some of the other on-set higher-ups into his trailer, all of whom were male. Then he called Payton back in to question her. Was she really not going to perform the nude scenes? Wouldn't she just take her top off? "At one point," says Payton, "somebody in the room is just like, 'You know, we stuck our neck out to hire you for this.'" When Payton's post-shower scene in "Flight of Fury" was finally filmed, she convinced on-set higher-ups to let her wear a negligee rather than appear nude. Producers of "Flight of Fury" did not respond to multiple requests for comment. Seagal also has not been available for comment, and Anthony Falangetti, an attorney representing Seagal, states that, "It appears based upon Ms. Payton's assertions, that she did not have to do anything she didn't want to do." Still, she was pushed far beyond her comfort zone; she was clothed for the sex scene with her female co-star, but their interaction was graphic, and it was choreographed by the same all-male team that pressured her to perform topless. "They are choreographing, 'Suck her breast here, kiss her there, pull her hair back," says Payton. "And they keep saying, 'Remember what you're doing, that's good, that's good.' It was so creepy. ... I just felt really (terrible), and very powerless." It took Payton, who has since gone on to appear on "Californication," "Ballers" and "The Walking Dead," a long time to come to terms with what happened. "To be reduced to some sex toy or something, none of that feels good," she said. Seagal is a horrible sex pest who multiple women have accused of sexual assault. His movies are the least of his crimes.
I like how Seagal plays exactly the same character in all of these movies and there's not a single ounce of a character arc in any of them. He never gets injured, he never breaks a sweat, he never faces an obstacle that he doesn't immediately overcome in the simplest way possible, everyone talks about how amazing he is. Just ego validation front to back.
@@StevieB8363 She willingly took a bit part in a Steven Seagal 'film.' How much dignity could she possibly possess. Ok, enough to NOT wanna have to kiss Steven Seagal. Ok, that's fair...
"But they can't risk a transforming car becoming fully sentient, so they make the right choice and blow it the f$&k up" 😂😂😂. I laughed till I cried. Thank you Space Ice. You're an all-star.
"Making sense has no place in a Seagal movie." Sounds about right. Someone please give this guy the Presidential Medal of Freedom simply for torturing himself watching this movie so we don't have to.
Segal has his niche market. Guys getting together in some dude's home theater all smoking and drinking up and laughing out loud throughout the film. I want to be part of that gang of guys.
i would say come around and tag along coz we do this once a month, rolling a few blunts having some drinks and watching a baaad movie, last month it was "battlefield earth" (we nearly croaked from laugthing), befor that it was "the room" (holy hell xD) and this month it will be uwe bolls masterpiece "bloodrayne"(featuring meat lofe) and im looking forward to it xD, and after seeing this i think we have to put some steven onto the menu
"So Seagal shows off his expert driving by throwing it into 4th gear from a dead stop and flies right through the heavily fortified roadblock " 🤣🤣🤣 i love this channel haven't seen the movie but now i feel like i do need to see it. This recap/review had me in tears
The "trivia" section from IMDB says something Space Ice would have written himself: "Steven Seagal has said that this is his favourite movie since Under Siege. In an interview with Sight & Sound magazine he said "my character's arc was the most satisfying journey I've taken as a full-bodied action hero in some time. Where I've traditionally played guys who slap other guys about a bit and then throw them through some furniture, or slap some guys and shoot others, or shoot them and throw them through furniture, or even slap, shoot _and_ throw them through furniture, in this movie I slap some guys, shoot some guys, throw some through furniture...but then I _also_ get in a plane and drop bombs on others. So really that's a lot of range, and something new I can challenge myself with as a distraction to the frustration of my pants feeling tighter."
This movie has been an inspiration. I have now been dictator of a decently sized African country for about a decade and I would not have made it without him! Thank you, Steven Seagull
"Slides across like a greased up penguin"... Mega LOL... Where do you come up with this Space? That is some serious comedic talent . Keep 'em coming Space, I can't get enough of the reviews.. P.S. You should make a video on any one of a plethora of movies churned out by the Asylum Productions for the ScyFy channel. If you're not familiar with them those are usually the monster movies with giant crocs, snakes, sharks, etc...
His first few, where he actually looked like he was trying, were decent. Then it didn't so much go downhill as much as it just plummeted straight to hell. And DVD
Steven Seagal as Santa Claus is a casting decision i can get behind. I like to imagine that he goes to peoples homes, eat their cookies and leave a dvd of "on deadly ground"
I remember watching this movie years ago and it was literally the most incoherent movie I've ever watched. They just hop from one scene to another and nothing is explained whatsoever. This was the first 'Seagal direct-to-dvd' movie I watched so I didn't yet know they are all basically like that...
“Anyways, Seagal’s been locked up for a while and has a real thirst for some innocent blood. So he drives into oncoming traffic hoping to get lucky and take out a family “ LOL!!!!! I’m dying 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
let me get this straight. They picked some random dude off the street who just killed people in a convienience store and decided to give him a top secret mission, put him on a flight in a SR-71 blackbird to go fight some battle for them?
a few minutes earlier I thought it would be a perfect parody of Seagal's films if the main character was given a mission to take down an international drug cartel, but in the first 5 minutes he walks into a convenient store to buy cigarettes and after being told how much it is, he shoots the clerk, takes the cigarettes and walks away, AND none of this is mentioned later. then I saw your comment 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@jonthrelkeld2910 Yes Jon, I got it. My response to you was a little unclear but it was meant to support your intent. Which, by the way, made me laugh. We should be grateful to "the Greater Being" for allowing this borderline sociopath with the spine of a sea slug and the brains of an amoeba to exist as he makes almost anyone else on the planet look pretty good, by comparison.
Space I gotta say this is my absolute favorite kind of content on RUclips. I found your channel 2 days ago, and have been non stop watching your vids ever since. Thank you for pumping out these gems
She didn't faint. She realized if she stayed up, she would've had to make out with Seagul. So then she decided to play dead and get out of the movie. 🤣
@@rickoshay5525 I dont know about that, it was probably stock footage. The navy likes working with Hollywood, even though its a massive pain to go through every frame of every take and scrub it for classified material. The airforce does not like movies. Watch a big budget film, the f22s are always cgi. But the f18s are real and flown by navy pilots to get the best shots possible. But sometimes stock footage is released, or stunt men copy a known parachuting tactic, or the planes eventually get purchased by other countries and they get paid to be in our movies.
For one of seagulls movies that had navi seals in it , seagull was offered to train with navy seals and he simply stated " there isnt anything they can teach me " he's literally the worst type of person.
Sometimes I get so caught up in watching episode after episode of Space Ice that I forget to hit the like button, but then I think: "I'll just hit it next time" Because I'm going to watch them all 7, 8, 9, 10 times.
Only Seagal would write a script where a stealth bomber has a Romulan cloaking device. Pro tip: They’re called stealth bombers because they don’t show up on radar; not because they can turn invisible. 😅
In sensei's defense I legit thought they turned invisible when I first heard about them. I was a child though and I also quickly learned after that they were invisible to radar which was extremely disappointing
No, it's actually a proof that the laws of physics aren't actually the same in every place and in every direction, which would basically shatter the entire modern cosmology and physics.
When the De Niro lookalike shows up again, Space Ice has this bombshell: "Then, holy shit, De Niro's trapped, but he ain't going out like a bitch, so he plunges to his death, like a fucking boss."
Dear Space Ice…whoever you are. The pain you’ve no doubt endured having to sit through these action-packed thrillers on our behalf is greatly appreciated. Thank you for your sacrifice.⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I no longer think it's painful for Space Ice to watch horrible movies. I think he gets off on exposing the bad logic and acting in these movies. I mean, it's fun badmouthing something, and getting paid to post your opinion online is just the icing on the cake.
It’s amazing how even though I’ve seen any Seagal movies, I can predict exactly what would happen in almost every single one. The moment he went to get that coffee I knew he would beat up some thugs that would try to rob him or someone near him
How does this channel not have billions of subscribers??? I was brushing my teeth and did a Danny Thomas spit take laughing at the $100 split 4 ways is life changing money 😂😂😂
I tried watching this movie years ago. I got to the convenient store scene. When he slid "across the entire store like a greased up penguin” I shut it off. I couldn't take any more stupidity.
Dude I swear I’ve been watching these videos every week for two years and somehow missed this one, also who knew there were so many Steven Segal movies
I love how ''and then he just starts murdering everyone'' applies so well to almost every Seagal movie. Seriously, he really needs to keep his blood lust in check.
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Check out my Patreon for ad-free and censorship free videos: patreon.com/Space_Ice
Steven Segal's Flight of Fury is so bad that he proves Santa exists, and then kills him in front of a preschool, all on a live stream that is automatically downloaded to every device which is connected to the Internet and then it plays on repeat until the device is unplugged.
Can you review In To The Sun? It's the movie when Segal believes he's Japanese. It was the first Segal movie I ever saw.
@@bollockjohnson6156 See you posting similar things on a few space ice's videos. You're an obsessed stalker 🤣
@@bollockjohnson6156 You go to space ice's channel and just mash f5 all day? I swear you say the same thing on all his videos as soon as they come out. Guy's living rent free in your head 24/7
I'm begging you for a review of china salesman 🙏🏾 🙏🏾 🤣🤣🤣
This movie is so bad that my father who abandoned me at 7 years old came back home to smash the TV on which I was watching it and then abandoned me again
You must be 8 years old by now? Time to start supporting yourself. Dads never coming back from getting cigarettes and booze. 🤷
😂
He did the right thing.
Thats called parenting you ungrateful brat. Just for that Im adopting you and then leaving.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
“Seagal flies to Afghanistan, and due to the extra weight, has to be fueled the entire flight.” 😂😂😂😂
I spit out my coffee when I heard that. Hilarious!
The "posthumously transferred back to the navy" really put it over the top for me 🤣
HAHAHAHAHA
Hahaha. Best line.
Best comment ever for this award winning action movie...
"Neck full of ass knife" is a timeless phrase.
I'm naming my band this
Tbf id be terrified if a dude pulled a knife out of his ass 😂
I need a T-Shirt with this phrase 😂
"And it's never mentioned again" 😂
The ranger, seal, ranger, seal switcheroos was fecking brilliant 😂
The genius of Steven Segal and his incoherent plot threads
Every Steven Seagal movie in a nutshell:
-Steven Seagal is either former special forces or CIA
-Everyone brags about how awesome Segal is
-Steven Seagal’s character will be portrayed as a good guy while doing illegal things
-Women that are significantly younger than him will be attracted to him
-A plot that makes no sense
-Steven Seagal using body doubles for anything
-Steven Segal will also mumble his way through scenes
-Steven Seagal is portrayed as an invincible badass that takes no damage during his fights
Anything else I forget?
Don't forget the strip clubs!
Steven Seagal's epic hand-to-hand combat and his precise no-look shootings
A benevolent gift for Space Ice to endlessly entertain us in an otherwise boring to death universe. As we all know, good movies are for kids. Mocking bad movies is far more interesting. At least for me.😅
He's too lazy to film a significant part of the movie so there's always one or more characters who basically carry the plot for him (e.g. nose picky here doing most of the climax).
introducing: the awesome Rambo like dude who does all the movie for seagul but sadly kamikase himself at the end, so the former takes all the credits and women.
Steven Seagal is truly inspirational! He has never let his complete lack of talent or ability as an actor, storyteller and filmmaker stand in the way of his dream of becoming an actor, storyteller and filmmaker.
The American Dream. LOL
The best actors are not convincing in action films.
So much so that I'm beginning to think these movies are just a way to wash money or something. Nothing else makes sense.
@@rasszo8729mostly its to sleep with young desperate actresses
did you write the one from Neil Breen's movie too (from the same channel) or did you just copy paste it and replaced Breen's name with Seagal's?
The line about the $100 in the register split four ways being life changing nearly killed me 😂😂😂
😂🤣😂😂🤣
😃🤣😂😀😂🤣😃
🤣
The "sliding across the entire store like a greased up penguin" did that for me XD
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
"... and due to the extra weight has to be refueled the entire flight" Epic writing, once again
Nearly shit myself when I heard it lol
I always laugh so hard at your lines about how bloodthirsty Steven Seagal is. "He drives into oncoming traffic hoping to take out a family" lmfao
yup! xD
Seagull can't help himself. It's his dark passenger.
Bloodthirsty for innocent people 😆
But these slippery bastards keep swerving out the way😂😂
"with one solid punch to the stomach!!" lmao
"He pulls himself up with so much power that he pops straight through the top"
That really made my day.
And then Teen Wolfed the fuck out of there haha
You'd better all take notes in case
Wow. That teleportation was awesome
It was in fact a well known bug used by speed runners. If go under the truck and push yourself close enough to the underside, the game doesn't understand if you're under the truck or inside, so it pops you on top of it.
Sounds like something you would hear about Chuck Norris :D.
he killed the cashier too lmao
He was suspicious.
@@goofygrandlouis6296 lol "you know what imma just hit a full sweep tonight" lmao
"You set it off, and walk away...when ya don't care about the people you killed"- Lonely Island Boys "Cool guys don't look at explosions"
Had to be so he could get free coffee
For the LOLs
‘The nurse can’t help but swoon at the sight of Seagal murdering a defenceless old man’ 😂
But there's no time to explain Because now he's Judo-Chopping this guard right in the body armour.
😂😂😂😂😂
The way Seagul holds guns while shooting is beautifully insane. He doesn't even bother
The question is is it better or worse than whatever tf he’s doing with that knife 😂
😂😂
You are Very Right at this!
Dont respect wepons because these things cause Death.
Seagal Is Best !
Love him.
Sincerly Martin KALMUS
In Mother Seagalia, we're not holding guns and bother about it. Guns are holding onto us and that's bother them.
You are right. The best phrase to describe Seagal is "he doesn't even bother".
“Slides across the entire store like a greased up penguin”. My man gives seagal 0 breaks and I love it 😂
"prentending like recoil doesn't exist" is a little but nice detail that further proves 0 breaks given !😂 and that's what's great about SI
That’s my favourite line!
Me too. Iceman kills!!!
And I still believe in Santa Claus lmao
😂😂💀💀💀
"... a neck full of ass knife" Those words have never been used in that order in history.
Seagal needs to make like 6 or 7 movies a year. I absolutely love these tear downs 😂😂
With as much thought he puts in these movies he can make one every week
One of his movies supposedly took 28 days to make, so if that's correct you've likely got 6 or 7 and more by now, and more to come later if he keeps making movies.
@@Manglet762 that’s no surprise. Going by how shit they are the only time they would take a second cut is if when something actually cool happens accidentally the first time.
As an ex-Seal Ranger stealth pilot knife thrower, this movie was pretty accurate.
AAAAAND THE AWARD #gold goes to RA'VIRRTHETRADER ! :-)
😆
*ass knife thrower
Ra'virr the trader just admit your really seagal and your using a pseudonym, there's no way on earth two people could be an ex seal/ranger stealth ass knife thrower fighter pilot.
@@snelgrave101 HAHAHA ... WHINING #stevenseagal #exposed #hollywood #tmz #thesun
The girlfriend living in Afghanistan for no reason and the girl on girl action came out of nowhere 😂
There was no strip club seen so he has to make do 😅
She's opening up an Afghanistan strip club, the girl came by for her interview and screening process!
That and nose picky are the only redeeming qualities of this movie 😂
Typical Afghan action !
Such a progressive country.
Still so boring I only powered through this for space ice's sake
"...due to the extra weight, he has to be refueled for the entire flight."
Nearly choked on my coffee. Absolutely hilarious.😂
Not only is this film a direct rip off of Black Thunder with Michael Dudikoff but In an interview on young actresses being pressured to perform nude, Ciera Payton said she had just turned 18 when she was cast in a lead role opposite Steven Seagal in this film. It was her first professional acting job, and filming would take place in Romania. But before accepting the role, neither the film's producers nor her agent showed her the film's full script. So it wasn't until halfway through her flight from the U.S. to Romania that she read the entire screenplay for the first time and discovered a scene in which a character comes out of the shower naked. She said she panicked when she realized it was her character. She would also be performing a sex scene with another woman. When she stepped off the plane, knowing no one else on set and without enough money to even place an international phone call, Payton decided to go straight to the top and approached Seagal in his trailer. After thanking him for the opportunity, she explained that she hadn't been informed about the expected nude scene, and she wasn't comfortable performing it. "He's kind of sitting there," said Payton, "and he's trying to think of what to say, and he goes, 'You won't even show your tits?'" The actor sent Payton outside and gathered some of the other on-set higher-ups into his trailer, all of whom were male. Then he called Payton back in to question her. Was she really not going to perform the nude scenes? Wouldn't she just take her top off? "At one point," says Payton, "somebody in the room is just like, 'You know, we stuck our neck out to hire you for this.'" When Payton's post-shower scene in "Flight of Fury" was finally filmed, she convinced on-set higher-ups to let her wear a negligee rather than appear nude. Producers of "Flight of Fury" did not respond to multiple requests for comment. Seagal also has not been available for comment, and Anthony Falangetti, an attorney representing Seagal, states that, "It appears based upon Ms. Payton's assertions, that she did not have to do anything she didn't want to do." Still, she was pushed far beyond her comfort zone; she was clothed for the sex scene with her female co-star, but their interaction was graphic, and it was choreographed by the same all-male team that pressured her to perform topless. "They are choreographing, 'Suck her breast here, kiss her there, pull her hair back," says Payton. "And they keep saying, 'Remember what you're doing, that's good, that's good.' It was so creepy. ... I just felt really (terrible), and very powerless." It took Payton, who has since gone on to appear on "Californication," "Ballers" and "The Walking Dead," a long time to come to terms with what happened. "To be reduced to some sex toy or something, none of that feels good," she said.
Seagal is a horrible sex pest who multiple women have accused of sexual assault. His movies are the least of his crimes.
true
Just say I know he got a 16 year old babysitter prego from the neighbors
@@tomortiz3514 British for PREGNANT.
I like how Seagal plays exactly the same character in all of these movies and there's not a single ounce of a character arc in any of them. He never gets injured, he never breaks a sweat, he never faces an obstacle that he doesn't immediately overcome in the simplest way possible, everyone talks about how amazing he is. Just ego validation front to back.
Dude, he's Steven Seagal. He is... the only man Chuck Norris fears 😁😁😁.
I still think its better than john wick
@@IgnorantWeed Nah man.
And he gets to wear his trademark full-length leather overcoat, custom-made by Big Agnes, Colorado’s finest tent maker.
@@svartvarg9778 I was never as bored as when watching john wick movie
The way the nurse just laid down on the floor tho 🤣🤣🤣
It was that or have a make-out session with Seagal. She chose to preserve her dignity.
I know right?!!! 🤣🤣🤣
She deserved an Oscar for that attempt at bad acting.
Seems like a natural reaction to me
@@StevieB8363 She willingly took a bit part in a Steven Seagal 'film.'
How much dignity could she possibly possess.
Ok, enough to NOT wanna have to kiss Steven Seagal.
Ok, that's fair...
The sitting duck strategy..😂😂
This guy is comic gold.
(6:44) “Robert fkn DeNiro shows up to give him an assist…” that’s fkn golden man!
Went from US army rangers to Navy Seals within seconds. They'll be in the Space Force by the time they land on the ground.
That scene of the HALO drop was ripped off from the 1990 film Navy Seals. Seagull better be careful or Charlie Sheen may come after him!
😆😆😆😆😆
By the time they land on the moon :p
Who do think supplies Charlie with the Tiger Blood?
"But they can't risk a transforming car becoming fully sentient, so they make the right choice and blow it the f$&k up" 😂😂😂. I laughed till I cried. Thank you Space Ice. You're an all-star.
And remember his partner? Don't worry, the military ender up sending more planes for him... and blew him the f$&k up. 😂😂😂
seagal doesn’t want a transformer-seagal crossover
I like the "Army Rangers transferring to the Navy Seals in mid-air, then transfer back." Good one!!
I fricken die every time you start a Steven seagull movie review with “mega block buster hit movie, where he showed the world….”
Wait …. Seagal just happens to know how to fly an SR-71 AND an F-117? Wow, we need more pilots like him.
"This guy stopped a convenience store robbery. Let's hire him to recover a stealth fighter plane."
@@playlist9980😂😂😂😂😂
Who doesn't?
Remember that he is top special forces with 50+ years experience at anything
He used someone outside the matrix to download the schematics...
"Making sense has no place in a Seagal movie."
Sounds about right. Someone please give this guy the Presidential Medal of Freedom simply for torturing himself watching this movie so we don't have to.
Segal has his niche market. Guys getting together in some dude's home theater all smoking and drinking up and laughing out loud throughout the film. I want to be part of that gang of guys.
i would say come around and tag along coz we do this once a month, rolling a few blunts having some drinks and watching a baaad movie, last month it was "battlefield earth" (we nearly croaked from laugthing), befor that it was "the room" (holy hell xD) and this month it will be uwe bolls masterpiece "bloodrayne"(featuring meat lofe) and im looking forward to it xD, and after seeing this i think we have to put some steven onto the menu
That thumbnail though. “Top Gut” 🤣
"A neck full of assknife" had me screaming with laughter. Why does Seagal always kill so many innocent people? Like the cashier?!?
I really, really don't understand this. Why does he insist on portraying himself as a dickhead deliberately at all times?
He's scared of first hand accounts on RUclips
Because "he grew up in a bad neighborhood"
He also gets 3 body doubles killed per week.
Neck full of ass knife!! Bro that shit is funny
"Segal shows off his expert driving by throwing it into fourth gear from a dead stop" got me real bad.. LMAO!🤣🤣🤣
I had to pause the video at that point. This really took me out. Laughing so hard I'm crying lmao
@@davidbass6460 wow weird to know I'm not the only one that had to stop the vid to finish laughing at that lol
"A neck full of ass knife" almost choked of laughter after this one lol
"So Seagal shows off his expert driving by throwing it into 4th gear from a dead stop and flies right through the heavily fortified roadblock " 🤣🤣🤣 i love this channel haven't seen the movie but now i feel like i do need to see it. This recap/review had me in tears
"But Seagal thrives on stupidity". I love this guy.
"A neck full of ass knife" is not a sentence I would have ever imagined I would hear 🤣
A sentence never thought of but everyone needs to hear 😆😆😆
Yeahhhh but he literally took out the knife from his ass.....
So, SpaceIce gotta say what they gotta say....
When Segal put it back he had a a$s full of neck knife 🗡 🤣
Hmm, the ass knife might explain the waddle.
@@OvalRock ..or why he runs like a girl.
The "trivia" section from IMDB says something Space Ice would have written himself:
"Steven Seagal has said that this is his favourite movie since Under Siege. In an interview with Sight & Sound magazine he said "my character's arc was the most satisfying journey I've taken as a full-bodied action hero in some time. Where I've traditionally played guys who slap other guys about a bit and then throw them through some furniture, or slap some guys and shoot others, or shoot them and throw them through furniture, or even slap, shoot _and_ throw them through furniture, in this movie I slap some guys, shoot some guys, throw some through furniture...but then I _also_ get in a plane and drop bombs on others. So really that's a lot of range, and something new I can challenge myself with as a distraction to the frustration of my pants feeling tighter."
I've been sending his movies to my former boss every Christmas since I retired 10 years ago 🤣🤣🤣
Whosever job it is to paint Seagals hairline on each day deserves a medal
Paint? I thought it was a scrap of beach towel dyed black.
This movie has been an inspiration. I have now been dictator of a decently sized African country for about a decade and I would not have made it without him! Thank you, Steven Seagull
"Slides across like a greased up penguin"... Mega LOL... Where do you come up with this Space? That is some serious comedic talent . Keep 'em coming Space, I can't get enough of the reviews..
P.S. You should make a video on any one of a plethora of movies churned out by the Asylum Productions for the ScyFy channel. If you're not familiar with them those are usually the monster movies with giant crocs, snakes, sharks, etc...
Steven Seagal is the real world equivalent of "Somehow Palpatine has come back"
No pretext no development no forshadow. Just, oh how convenient
😂😂
Except in the real world he's called Steven's Pal Putin!
Without skills or style. ☮️
I spent a year in Afghanistan. NOT ONCE was I treated to hot girl on girl action. Mr Seagal, you are a legend! Space Ice, brilliant as ever!
Yeah... that part of the movie was as incredibly random as it was nonsensical.
So typical Steven Seagull.
You obviously weren't as cool, badass, smart and sexy Steven Seagal is
How many times did you transfer back and forth from Army and Navy?
You werent keeping a knife in your ass. Thats the key
Did 3 tours. NEVER! EVER! Seen any girl on girl action! If only I could be like Seagal! 😭😭😭
“But Seagal THRIVES on stupidity!”
I can’t breathe!🤣😂
8:30 "...Seagal's Dark Passenger..." I noticed that auto-caption correctly capitalized "Dark Passenger." Nice "Dexter" reference, sir! 💋👍
At this point, youd think Segal would have accidentally made a good movie.
To be fair, Under Siege was pretty good. Please don't make me defend Seagal ever again.
It would go against everything he believes in
His first few, where he actually looked like he was trying, were decent. Then it didn't so much go downhill as much as it just plummeted straight to hell. And DVD
We’ll have to be satisfied with him accidentally making bad ones.
IMO his movie career went to shit after Under Siege 2
Steven Seagal as Santa Claus is a casting decision i can get behind. I like to imagine that he goes to peoples homes, eat their cookies and leave a dvd of "on deadly ground"
"Man, what did I do to piss Santa off enough to deserve this?"
Like, instead of coal?
yes, but first he masacre all the family, to clench his blood thirst , then leaves the DVD.
I would watch the fuck out of a movie with SS as Santa 🎅🎅
"I love the fuck out of these cookies. Ho ho ho."
I remember watching this movie years ago and it was literally the most incoherent movie I've ever watched. They just hop from one scene to another and nothing is explained whatsoever. This was the first 'Seagal direct-to-dvd' movie I watched so I didn't yet know they are all basically like that...
I am going through this playlist slowly because I fear when I finish this all the joy in the world will be gone.
“Anyways, Seagal’s been locked up for a while and has a real thirst for some innocent blood. So he drives into oncoming traffic hoping to get lucky and take out a family “
LOL!!!!! I’m dying 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
"And it's never mentioned again" 😂 I always love that part
2:30 the way Steven seagull runs always makes me crack a smile😂
“…neck full of ass knife” is cathartic poetry
let me get this straight. They picked some random dude off the street who just killed people in a convienience store and decided to give him a top secret mission, put him on a flight in a SR-71 blackbird to go fight some battle for them?
Pay attention.
Sensei Seagal is not a " random dude"
a few minutes earlier I thought it would be a perfect parody of Seagal's films if the main character was given a mission to take down an international drug cartel, but in the first 5 minutes he walks into a convenient store to buy cigarettes and after being told how much it is, he shoots the clerk, takes the cigarettes and walks away, AND none of this is mentioned later. then I saw your comment 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
To everyone else, this plotline was completely stupid. To Seagal, this was a masterpiece.
Seagal is an unrecognized comic genius who is truly a master of self-parody.
Sadly, I don't think that is his intention. Do you think he just might be a delusional, fat-arsed goon?
@@-MacCat- I was being sardonic. Seagal is a borderline sociopath with the spine of a sea slug and the brains of an amoeba
@@jonthrelkeld2910 Yes Jon, I got it. My response to you was a little unclear but it was meant to support your intent. Which, by the way, made me laugh. We should be grateful to "the Greater Being" for allowing this borderline sociopath with the spine of a sea slug and the brains of an amoeba to exist as he makes almost anyone else on the planet look pretty good, by comparison.
He's not self-aware though. But he's so awesome the police let him go despite all the killings.
@@-MacCat- He might be the reason extra-terrestial civilizations have ignored us?
Space I gotta say this is my absolute favorite kind of content on RUclips. I found your channel 2 days ago, and have been non stop watching your vids ever since. Thank you for pumping out these gems
"Seagal flies to Afghanistan and due to the extra weight has to be refilled the entire flight" 5:22 🤣😂🤣😂🤣
"And due to the extra weight has to be refueled the entire flight" :D Best line ever :D
Truly is the best line yet
😂😂
greased penguin comes in second :)
Can we all just appreciate how that woman at the beginning didn't even *try* to look like she fainted?
She didn't faint. She realized if she stayed up, she would've had to make out with Seagul. So then she decided to play dead and get out of the movie. 🤣
@@GabrielAngelfire That ploy works until Seagal discovers necrophilia
That was the dest part and best acting in the movie 😂
Oscar worthy material 😂😂
😂😂😂😂
2:46 the greased up penguin maneuver works every time
Everytime i hear the start of the review..."this is a Steven Seagal movie...Where he shows the World"...IM DEAD ALREADY🤣😭😭
Seagal deployed flares by activating infrared cameras on his plane. Truly one of the pilots of all time
I had to scroll way too far down to see this. Shit had me in stitches
Haha
"They call me Crash cause I never had one."
this comment is gold
Bruh the soldiers switch from rangers to seal team was hilarious 😂😂😂😂
And they even ripped off the airdrop footage from the Navy SEALS movie.
@@rickoshay5525 I dont know about that, it was probably stock footage. The navy likes working with Hollywood, even though its a massive pain to go through every frame of every take and scrub it for classified material. The airforce does not like movies. Watch a big budget film, the f22s are always cgi. But the f18s are real and flown by navy pilots to get the best shots possible. But sometimes stock footage is released, or stunt men copy a known parachuting tactic, or the planes eventually get purchased by other countries and they get paid to be in our movies.
@@fredsmith9714 This movie ripped off footage from another film.
imagine how much worse the film would be if there was a script
Guess the military branches were preemptively trying to push the blame to each other for when the team got merced.
For one of seagulls movies that had navi seals in it , seagull was offered to train with navy seals and he simply stated " there isnt anything they can teach me " he's literally the worst type of person.
Sometimes I get so caught up in watching episode after episode of Space Ice that I forget to hit the like button, but then I think:
"I'll just hit it next time"
Because I'm going to watch them all 7, 8, 9, 10 times.
Only Seagal would write a script where a stealth bomber has a Romulan cloaking device.
Pro tip: They’re called stealth bombers because they don’t show up on radar; not because they can turn invisible. 😅
In sensei's defense I legit thought they turned invisible when I first heard about them. I was a child though and I also quickly learned after that they were invisible to radar which was extremely disappointing
Reminds me of that one where the mafia accountant "knew where the bodies were buried" and he literally took them to buried bodies
we all know that, except Seagul obviously.
Seriously that guy is insane haha. But it gives us great content thanks to Space Ice.
It's a fighter, not bomber.
The Ranger-Seal-Ranger-Seal sequence is solid gold.
Is there any lazier yet pervasive trope than the "people decide to happen to rob the store that the hero is in so he can discover his skills?"
5:23 😂 ‘due to the extra weight the plane had to be refueled the entire flight’. That is perfect writing
The fact that Space Ice calls every one of these movies "the worst ever" and yet is 100% correct definitively proves the existence of a multiverse.
No, it's actually a proof that the laws of physics aren't actually the same in every place and in every direction, which would basically shatter the entire modern cosmology and physics.
Einstein referred to this as "Segal Theory."
“Sésgale magically appears” 😂😂😂 He’s the new face of Lucky Charms 😂😂😂
The bit about the team switching back and forth between Army and Navy made me laugh so hard I think I pulled a muscle.
"Robert F*cking DeNiro shows up" LMAO how do his body doubles keep getting worse? 😂
When the De Niro lookalike shows up again, Space Ice has this bombshell:
"Then, holy shit, De Niro's trapped, but he ain't going out like a bitch, so he plunges to his death, like a fucking boss."
Wait, that's supposed to be his body double? LMAO
@@venichen1 ikr he's not even wearing the same clothes 😂😂😂
@@sharpfalcon6196I’m still laughing at that 😂
I can't stop laughing 😂😂😂
Worst part is... Someone in this world probably saw this movie and LOVED IT 😶
That someone is Seagal
Russians
I loved this movie 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂
Yeah I someone like that lol
@@eternalproductions Chinese
"Everyone realises how stupid that was" at the exact moment "screenplay by steven seagal" message pops up at 1:10 😂😂😂
At this point i think Steven Seagal is just trolling all of us with his bad movies.
Yes he is. Brulliant
"Along with the cashier who rubbed Seagal the wrong way" ROFL DOUBLE LMAO 🤣🤣🤣🤣 🤣🤣🤣🤣
This is the only way to actually enjoy watching a Steven Segal movie 😄😄
I was gonna make this exact comment! hahahaha
😳🥹🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂
He's made a torturous movie hilarious
@SpaceIce i love how you narrate these movies and break down all the bullshit, you make me laugh constantly! Thanks!
Stumbled upon your channel courtesy of a random Facebook post in a WH40K group.
Subscribed
Dear Space Ice…whoever you are.
The pain you’ve no doubt endured having to sit through these action-packed thrillers on our behalf is greatly appreciated. Thank you for your sacrifice.⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
At least they are all mega blockbusters!
@@rightpa Mega direct to Blockbusters...
(You can use this one Ice man).
@@rightpa *Mega blockbuster hit movie* is that one line that gives me a laugh when it comes to terrible Seagal movies.
6 stars out of 5. Just like seagal
I no longer think it's painful for Space Ice to watch horrible movies. I think he gets off on exposing the bad logic and acting in these movies. I mean, it's fun badmouthing something, and getting paid to post your opinion online is just the icing on the cake.
Space Ice Saturday is my favorite day of the week
Deffo is.
LOL what will we do after all Segal’s movies are narrated
I know! I make breakfast for the family while watching lol 🤣
@Andy watch his Reality TV series 'Law Man'
@@The808andrew808 Hopefully Seagal will continue making new cheap shitty movies for Space Ice to ridicule.
Seagal took the “fake it til you make it” philosophy way too far.
It’s amazing how even though I’ve seen any Seagal movies, I can predict exactly what would happen in almost every single one. The moment he went to get that coffee I knew he would beat up some thugs that would try to rob him or someone near him
Segal puts more scenes in his films where people explain how awesome and badass he is, than JCVD enjoys a dance at a Thai bar.
R. Lee Ermey did my favorite one in On Deadly Ground. ruclips.net/video/Iq4dhgD07qo/видео.html
@@Flint-Dibble-the-Don hearing an actual badass like R. Lee Ermey be forced to describe Seagal in such a way hurts the very core of my soul. R.I.P.
"greased up pinguin" you made me laugh so hard I had tears in my eyes. Thank you. You are doing gods work.
The greased up penguin line was absolutely awesome and 100% sold the film for me I need to see that bit.
Add to that a greased up penguin would have lot more credibility.
3:00 😂 God damn, man.. lmfao you are always hilarious, Space Ice. You've got me over here actually laughing out loud at the ass-knife part.. lol
How does this channel not have billions of subscribers??? I was brushing my teeth and did a Danny Thomas spit take laughing at the $100 split 4 ways is life changing money 😂😂😂
Whenever Space Ice reviews another Steven Seagal movie my day gets 10 times better.
It is like a Christmass, but any day of the year.
"A man that has a plot can make a great movie" - A movie producer
"A man that has lost the plot can make any movie" - Steven seagal
🤣
🤣
🤣
"What's a plot?" - Seagal
🤣🤣🤣👍👍👍👍
I tried watching this movie years ago. I got to the convenient store scene. When he slid "across the entire store like a greased up penguin” I shut it off. I couldn't take any more stupidity.
"A neck full of ass knife" is probably the greatest thing i've ever heard
“And it’s never mentioned again”... I don’t know why but that line always kills me😂😂😂
Something as simple like that . 😄 or "But, whatever..." - Space Ice
@@maurobertolone5198 it's also the way he says it xD
That's normal in Seagal's movies, the scripts have more plot holes than a swiss cheese.
I always laugh when Space Ice says 'for the reasons that are never explained'
“Anyways…”
This is the Best channel on Earth!😂
Agreed.
Concur
Merica!
@@marcwilliams1942 Bro your name is so close to mine; you had to spell it with a c???
By any chance is your middle name Anthony? Lol
@@retroroyalplays9457 Mine is lol😂
I'm not surprised the guys in the convenience store didn't notice Seagal, after all, he plays a lifeless clump of mass pretty well.
Dude I swear I’ve been watching these videos every week for two years and somehow missed this one, also who knew there were so many Steven Segal movies
I love how ''and then he just starts murdering everyone'' applies so well to almost every Seagal movie. Seriously, he really needs to keep his blood lust in check.