Damn, Rachel... girl, you need therapy, and lots of it. Family can be toxic. Having a relationship with abusive family members is NOT a moral imperative. And just because you struggled, doesn't mean everyone else should struggle. Ify, too, some of his comments... Shayne's uncharacteristic silence this episode was soooo telling! Kudos to him for making it through it lol
I'm really relieved by the comments for once. Rachel's responses in this episode truly shocked me. You don't choose toxic people over their victims, just because they're family.
this whole episode was like 100% bad takes, they shamed people for not being moved out at 23, like I know people in their 30's still at home either due to a lack of well-paying opportunities or for continued education, not to mention it *does* seem like stepmom there wants a perfect single family without step-daughter by the way she talks
@@Brett276 not to mention some cultures normalize a big/extended family under one roof which is more common than you think so really it's more than normal in mamy cases
If you tell a child that their father loves them while he neglects them, they will grow up thinking that love can look like neglect. It is more important for them to be able to recognize love than to believe that their father loves them.
precisely. when she said, "they need to know that their father loves them," i was a little stunned. if he doesnt love them, youll be lying to them and causing so much damage. better to show them that their mom and aunty and grandparents love them even if their father does not.
especially since kids can tell. knowing innately one thing is true and then being gaslit into thinking the opposite is not healthy for anyone and especially a kid. it just leads to confusion and frustration. in this scenario, the best thing to do is to not pretend. don't tell them their father doesn't care about them, but don't tell them he does. show your love for them 5x as much as the father should have.
It’s very obviously a money issue. Leaving your young children in an unlocked house is fine if you live in a nice area, but if they lived in a council estate they wouldn’t feel the same way. When you have money and your son cheats, you can’t abandon him! But I guarantee if the son had money and the dad was the poor one it would flip. Family before everything until that family member can’t afford to move out, then it’s your responsibility as a parent to force them out. These two grew up in average working class homes and think they have the right to speak on actually impoverished peoples lives because of it. I guarantee neither have given a cent to charity despite their riches.
“Why would this person not move out” “I moved out when I was this age” proceeds to tell us the most horrific living conditions that no one would ever want to live with.
Because you have to upgrade yourself from the flat. Older you become it’ll be more difficult to make the first step because all your friends are at level 2 or 3. Life is step by step.
@@saekubo3795 no, it isn't, there is no mile marker, no finish line, everyone has their own pace, get over it Also if you stay at home, work towards a career, and save money, you can actually get a decent living situation sooner
Why does she keep defending the deadbeat cheater?? I kept thinking “good for the dad for taking a stance!! The dude that married his mistress is a POS!” I agreed 100% with the dude making all the good points
My problem with the 23 year old story is that the two go on about how they moved out early, and in the VERY NEXT STORY they say people shouldn't be on a timeline when it comes to something big like marriage, and how nobody should be pressured. Make up y'alls minds
It's the fake acceptance for me. The fake "well you don't need to abide by a timeline" but they just shat on adults living at home. Like y'all are so indecisive about your takes and judged so many people in one breath, but then followed up with the fake acceptance. And the reason it comes off as fake is because they were so adamant about people moving out at a certain age, but then try to sound accepting by saying there's no timeline for people. Clearly there is to Y'ALL judgemental asses. That take annoyed tf outta me. 🙄
It’s whiplash!! Rachel was also all about “don’t disown or throw away family” when talking about the asshole son who cheated on his wife! But then when a father doesn’t want to kick out his daughter the daughter needs to grow up and get kicked out? Like SHUT UP!!
shane being dead silent during certain opinions shared during this actually speaks volumes. he was definitely mentally disagreeing with a lot of what was being said but didn’t want to start up anything bc of how opinionated and defensive things were shared.
I noticed that as soon as they went "SHES 23!!" and expected her to move out. He was completely silent and obv disagreeing so much. I really wish he felt comfortable disagreeing with them
Not gonna lie, I saw it as, “you wanted to get with an older guy for his money, but realized you are with an older guy who is broke and are now stuck”!
Honestly came across a tad bit privileged to me, such life changing decisions don't work for everyone at the same point of their lives. I don't like that they were so judgmental of the girl like that at all
"If you cheat on your wife does that mean you can never have a relationship with your father again?" Took me OUT. Like that is completely unrelated to the conversation here and feels like Rachael grasping at straws to get the conversation back into her favor. Girl accept you had a bad take and accept that sometimes actions have consequences even when you're family
YES. This felt so desperate like "please someone agree with me". I feel a little bad for how torn apart she is in these comments, but it's clear that she has a lot of growth to do. Her takes were NOT GOOD here, and I honestly think a lot of them felt like they came from a very privileged position - it's clear she's never had to deal with cutting off a family member, and arguing for the abuser in these situations is so incredibly harmful.
@@annacompton9362That's what I was thinking! She mentioned before that she's VERY loyal to her family, so she's honestly never had to deal with this sort of stuff before.
i'd been absent mindedly binging these episodes while working but this line is what made me snap to complete attention and check the comments. her takes were making me a little uncomfortable (especially her previous comment "i'm EXTREMELY loyal to family!" made me 😬) but something about that line, man... like... he betrayed the trust of the MOTHER OF HIS CHILDREN, op's grandchildren, WHO IS FAMILY i might add, and rachel is like "he needs help :(" as if they haven't been trying to help him his whole life. no, the EX WIFE needs help. yeesh
It's so crazy how hard Rachel can ride the "Do anything for family" train and then immediately pivot to "If you're 23 you should be moving out and struggle"... Anyone else clock that?
this made me so mad! Girl stfu the economy is shit and you have no idea where these people live what their finances are like or if this person is mentally ready to be out on their own. What about full-time students? My mom allowed my brother to live at home until he was practically done with Med. school because it takes so long, and if he wanted to stay longer she would have no problem.
Definitely!!!! I’m from Germany and study in Munich, rent in Munich even with a roommate or several is still crazy, even with a full time job. And the waitlist for college dorms is extremely long. Just because they had the opportunities and resources to do that, to do “mushrooms in a zoo” doesn’t mean that everyone else does. They are being incredibly ignorant.
Bruh im the second to youngesr of 4. And all but my younger sibling moved out shortly after turning 18. Like that is normal to me and my culture. At 20 its TIME, and if you're making it into your mid 20s thats usually due to like a health concern or because you had a rough break. Like moving back in for a short time if something goes to shit is fine. But moving out between 16 and 20 is pretty much expected
And just to add. Im not saying thats healthy, but that's just where its at in my culture. The oldest person i knew living at home lived there until thwy could buy their own place at like 25. Working fulltime since they were 18
@@Beth-pm9kcif you look at a chart (found out from a mystery podcast) of inflation. Around 2019 it goes from a slow incline to just a roller coaster ride going straight up
Are you living at home when a new baby is coming and there are only 2 bedrooms? What would you do if that was happening? It's the crying to daddy that is embarrassing.
@@FortheBudgies the baby will sleep with the parents or in their room for the first few weeks and then they can stay in another room. I honestly don't know about the 23year old but if she had autism or some mental illness then I could see the argument for why the kid couldn't share that room if they actually consider her a fully functioning adult. Clearly there's a lack of communication, trust and or understanding between the trio. The point is you can make it work if people are trying to solve problems instead of shift responsibility to the burden of one to solve. Not having enough "rooms" or working on getting a better life situation (a 3 bedroom) for all of them tells me that they're not very collaborative individuals. plus it's on the parents for preparing their kids to move out with little things like low rent, a split of bills, building credit etc. Ease them into it or atleast give them a boot camp. Making an excuse that you have no time or that it isn't your job is not very adult and especially irresponsible. It's okay to admit you don't have those skills but it is childish to refuse to gain them or train them 2 months rent and a sticky note that says Goodluck with no skills is a bandage/participation Trophy for poor parenting in work. Sink or swim is for birds with higher bouncy and we wouldn't go kicking people off of clifts telling them to fall or fly. That's murder. Just because some people grab a branch or fall into some net doesn't mean that most people survive. If you get the same results in life from sleeping on your parents couch vs sleeping on some strangers couch (a stranger who'll potentially take advantage of you or remind you of how much of a burden you are to them) ends up being the same, then you need the guidance and help to get better at working with people. Something parents are supposed to teach you. But honestly there are so few adults and parents. People all seem to act like children waiting for other children to pretend that they're the most adult so they can go "nuh huh." She's really just the AH for asking strangers on the internet to raise her kid, step mom or not.
Exactly. She had a conversation with her parent and they're trashing her. This is coming from a place of privilege. The step mom is old enough to be her sibling, disgusting. Step was trying to throw her out and it's obvious.
the way it cut over to them when he said that and they're just looking at him like "wait what do mean controversial"💀 i have never seen anyone be so tone deaf on smosh, iffy was okay for most of it, but she really does not understand that people could have different life experiences 😭
The dad who skipped the wedding is NTA. I can’t stand when a cheaters family just pretend like everything is cool just to keep the peace. Good for them for supporting her and their grandkids. And let’s be clear. 2 wives before 24? That idiot is gonna do it again.
Oh my god, my cousin got divorced from his wife of 12 years last year because she had been having an affair for _years,_ and her family are straight up acting like she did nothing wrong. Their daughter is devastated and they’re trying to like, introduce her to her mom’s “new” boyfriend and there is just nothing more infuriating. They’re acting like she’s fragile and needs support when BITCH YOU CAUSED ALL OF THIS
Rachel saying that the dad should put up with his toxic son, who went against his advice, married and cheated on the mother of his kids, left her without any money or a place to live without any family supports nearby, immediately got married to the woman he cheated with and abandoned his kids- yet the father of the 23 year old should kick out his daughter because “she works full time and should have left years ago”. 💀 The hypocrisy. The whiplash. You could tell Shayne was embarrassed.
You don't understand, it's different. The 23-year-old is a woman so obviously she should suffer and the toxic son is a man so he shouldn't have any consequences for his actions /sarcasm
Rachel; “she’s 23 living at home? Embarrassing!” Also rachel: “the fact that people feel there is a timeline they must adhere to… you’re less worthy because of your age…sad” Please show your math, because?? what?! Hello double standards?
Absolutely!!! Their response to that made me so angry. "you wont ever be a true adult if you dont move out"??? Thats such a capitalist individualist ideology, a lot of us live with family our entire lives because that is our culture not because of financial issues. Not everyone needs to leave their family to live a "full" life. So much BS, so much bigotry, so much entitlement.
Im 27 and i take care of the house. I helped my older brother 36 when he had to move back. I take care of my younger brother. I pay for the house. If my father ever needed to come back, he is welcome. Family doesnt *only* work in the "american dream" style. It works in LOTS of ways. Dude im so heated im sorry lmao
I don't think it's about a timeline. Shayn and co. just had more symphathy for the soon to be mother and the baby who will have no space. Maybe you think you can store a baby in a closet but other people don't. Would you want the baby to rent an own place or the working 23 year old. Some people have no brain.
But the other girl IS doing things and just being shot down left and right because “it’s been done in the family already” while the other daughter, from what little was written, isn’t doing much at all….
@@harmonyoakes6386 honestly that’s something I admire about Shayne, he will try and see multiple perspectives and he will listen to other opinions even if he doesn’t agree.
i guess that's the reason why Rachel never appear on the reddit stories couch again, some of the people has hot takes like Ian, Noah and Tommy got back a few times Ify got some really good advices and takes tho, the "don't let them see their grand child" is terrifingly savage, and i loved it
"I've dated older guys and they liked me until I had an opinion" I mean her point probably still stands but it's still funny she took 2 bad take pills that morning and a whole bottle of orange juice
I had to laugh at this too as soon as he said that I knew they were going make some questionable verdicts I don’t think iv ever met anyone where being described as honest was a good thing Especially after the last episode I was recommended Shayne agreed that people who call themselves brutally honest are looking for an excuse to say wild things And wow they went further than i expected I get playing devils advocate I try to see both sides to every story they even start each answer sounding like they would try seeing both sides only to continue trying to justify the person in the wrong in every story And so passionately it often sounded like they were defending something they have experienced For shayne to even stay quiet when he couldn’t get his opinion across and say out loud he knows how everyone is going to react is very telling
In the case of the girl: honest doesn't mean right 🤣 In the case of the guy, I was sort of agreeing in some stuff with him, but the story of the 23 yo step daughter I'm not sure what was his point. He said the 23 woman acted like a child, but the 33 woman did too
Old comment, but also it makes perfect sense that she would wait to have the conversation with her actual parent and not the step mom who's her peer and probably got with her father when she was already an adult. The step mom shouldn't be part of this conversation. And frankly a baby doesn't need a room until they're a bit older.
27 year old here living with my narcissistic family in the economic fuckery, if I could move out, I would. No one should have to live in a basement with rats and it’s sad that she would be ok with someone else going through that :/
as a 27 year old that had a mouse in my first new space at 22 pls dont feel bad at ALL it wasn't worth it, i struggled a lot, i just got a nice apartment to live in mouse free this year it's super tough living with family! wishing you a better situation in the coming future ❤
As someone who is binging these Reddit episodes, this is the most upsetting episode with the worst takes. As a 27 Nigerian myself, who lives with their parents, I’m really side eyeing Ify for that move out story but Rachel was hard to listen to the entire episode. Misplaced empathy, hypocrisy and just all around misjudgments. As always Shayne was a joy to watch but I will not be revisiting this one when I do comfort listens. At least we have the Macdoesit episodes for prime television
Yeah I just made it to this one for the second time after seeing every other episode atleast 5-7 times each. She’s very annoying. The only other one that’s a bit questionable is where the stepdad had a murder house and the daughter was told about it by a neighbor and wants to move. The guest on the show kept saying that the dad didn’t treat the stepdaughter like a daughter when everything he described was very selfless and fatherly. His take annoyed me
Hey! Im also a 27 year old Nigerian living at home with his parents (i had moved out at one point but moved back to save money when i was unemployed and haven't had the cance to move out again)
I really like what you said about "Misplaced Empathy" because that's truly what it was in that story like I get what she was saying for a lot of it but this guy was so clearly an asshat that she almost came off as supportive and it wasn't a good look
Fr beause when it would pan to all 3 of them Shane was pulling a less than satisfied face to mention the fact that he's much less talkative in this episode any reasonable points he would make about the lack of information on some stuff was shut down which he responded by being queit if he was speaking with ANYONE ELSE he would have definitely expanded on what he wanted to say but he clearly didn't agree with most of what those two were saying at all
I audibly yelled shut the fuck up every time rachel tried defending the son in the wedding story. I have no respect for people who “feel bad” for abusers and deadbeats, especially not when two children are involved. Get over the “but he’s family” mentality already
Same! I don’t like Rachel. She’s an abusive enabler because she doesn’t want to see the worst in someone, even if what they do is actually evil. She doesn’t seem to grasp the concept that there are actual people in the world who are devoid of empathy and truly don’t care about anyone even tho they aren’t also mass murderers. She is sheltered and ignorant and comes across as someone who doesn’t want to face the truth.
this. and the other story about the step daughter not moving out. like, let's not bash those who are trying to prevent themselves from living in a basement with rats in their bed.
@@StonerOfGotham not to mention the prices of food, gas (in some areas), and just about every other resource that one would need in order to live independently
@@jomo00 yes exactly. I was a bit shocked they had such a strong take. Shayne was more empathic and not just screaming “but if I lived with rats she can too!!”😂😂 like bro what
That's exactly why I came to the comments section. I was wondering if I was the only person who disagreed with the hosts' views on when someone should move out of their parents' place.
I have NEVER seen Shayne SO quiet and uncomfortable as he was with the 23 year old moving out story, but I was right there with him, it was pure bullshit what Ify and Rachel was saying, especially Rachel! Holy shit, I have never been so aggravated at a person like I was with her…
also I could be completely wrong, but I think this might be the first if not the only time someone other than Shayne got to hold the tablet to blaze through the comments themselves? like I think at most I remember Shayne holding out the tablet for guests to read but not completely handing it over.
Legit shocked at Rachel's bad takes in this video. Just beacuse someone is family doesn't mean you should overlook them being toxic. Her rant about moving out also really comes off as "well I struggled and went through rough times so everyone should too".
girl…😭 how did she defend leaving a door unlocked with children but somehow called the dad an asshole for choosing a woman in need over his toxic son? what? 💀
@@aff77141facts!!! It’s wild to me how they were defending the mother in the story. Even if something bad was done to her, that doesn’t negate that she’s doing something bad herself
Well I think that it IS dangerous to leave your young kids in an unlocked house for moments of time, I think they’re ere more so defending the fact that the op of that story was wayy more in the wrong in this situation. The op is actually smart and I agree with them, but kidnapping anyone’s kids is just NOT IT, good friend, stupid action
It bothers me so much in the daughter in law story where everyone missed the part where the son took his wife out of her home state, isolated her, and made her a stay at home mother. Its a textbook form of abuse and thats why the father and sister stayed with her. She was all alone and it sounds like her only "friends" was his family. She had no support. They talked about her not being able to afford a place...that's the point, that's the manipulation and abuse. It's so weird how they completely missed that point and thought dad and sister were just doing it for her sanity/the safety of the kids? Yeesh
yeah. i definitely won't be attending some stupid wedding my asshole son is throwing and abandon his manipulated wife alone. if the son is capable of cheating and doing shitty things to their partner, i'm sure he'll be okay lol
Also, the fact that she is PART OF THEIR FAMILY. she has been part of their family for YEARS. The dad and sister are spending time with someone who was brought into their family and taking care of them after their brother has clearly been awful. People don’t have to dump your ex (who hasn’t done anything wrong) just because you do.
Yup. They really missed the point. Ify had a better take, but he still focused on the grandkids (which is fine, they also need support) but the abandoned wife was clearly abused by the son, and the father and sister didn't agree with that. I'm glad they realised that and supported the wife. She really needs it, being left all alone with two kids.
Lookit the upvote to downvote ratio on this episode (there's a Chrome add-on that makes it so you can see dislikes again, I highly recommend it). Most of the other videos are like, thousands and thousands of upvotes, usually under ONE thousand down. ....this one has *7.5K* downvotes (and I'm one of them). The audience did NOT like them.
The jump from “when I was 23 i needed the experience of barely affording rent and living in a rat cave” to “I’m 31 and there should be no timeline to big life moments”. Girl the cognitive dissonance
The absolute WHIPLASH I got from the "you're 23 you need to move out and stop being a burden on your parents" to "There is no timeline for big life milestones! You aren't worthless for waiting!! you're a victim of a societal systemic issue!!!" is fucking WILD. on a lighter note, I, too, was recently diagnosed with as Anemic and let me tell you! It has not changed my life at all except that now I take meds and can, in fact, do MORE things then I could before :)
im not anemic but iron deficient (dangerously close to anemic in my doctors words) and lemme say ive never felt more awake in my life with those supplements man
Honestly they're not considering the place where they are living, here in Italy for example it's really hard to move out because of the living cost. Anyway it might be because of certain mental health issues that she needs extrasupport and we don't know enough context for it.
love how shayne kept his diplomacy all the way to the end and ended with "i'm sure you will disagree with some of these takes..." like bruh he knows these two were acting awful
Yeah literally anemia is not a big deal it just means that you need to eat things that have high iron so you have more iron in your blood so you don't get dizzy.
I mean yes and no. It depends on the cause of the anemia. For instance, some people with liver and GI issues cannot process iron and it's a symptom of a much larger problem. My partner has that for instance, she doesn't just get dizzy. She turns white as a sheet and passes out before potentially vomiting and not being able to hold down food for days just from the sheer nausea and dizziness that comes from the iron lows. Don't misunderstand. I think this guy is a complete twit and honestly I think Ify has the right idea that he's looking for something to drop a bomb and hide behind.
For the most part i listen to these like a podcast but man whenever i looked after they were going off for a while, I had never seen Shayne like that and man I agree.
@@mirita2646 fr, i paused and came to the comments, it was a validating to know that pretty much everyone was feeling the same way about some of their takes
Crazy how rachel expects everyone to accept the cheating lying son back into the family but is grossed out by a 23 year old not being able to move out lol
@@hundredhanded1205 this comment is literally courtney's opinion, I and many ppl agree, it's not character assasination, it's just we think she had a bad take, which is valid.
"They need to grow up thinking that their dad loves them." I knew a kid throughout elementary and middle school who lived with his grandparents and only saw his parents a few times a year. He was told they were just too busy working all around the world earning money to support him. As he got older, his behavior in school got worse and worse. he would goof off, disobey teachers, and even hurt himself in the middle of class. We went to separate high schools and I never saw him again. Several years later, he posted his story to Facebook. He'd always had suspicions about his parents that only grew as time went on. Eventually he made his grandparents tell him the truth. His parents weren't traveling for work. They had never married and after he was born, they broke up. Neither one of them wanted him, so they left him with his maternal grandparents. Out of misguided love, his grandparents demanded that his parents at least pretend to love him and concocted this stupid story to explain why they weren't there 99% of the year. By the time he was 12, his parents had both moved on to start families with other people and had barely bothered to continue with this farce. Having his suspicions confirmed destroyed him. He turned to harder and harder drugs to escape from reality. He risked his life for cheap thrills. He just didn't care anymore whether he lived or died. Eventually, he was able to get help and start the process of recovery, but it's a long f*cking road when both your mind and body are absolutely wrecked. That's what growing up thinking your parents love you looks like when they don't actually love you. Don't ever do that to a kid. Edit: Oh wow I didn't realize this comment got so much attention. To clarify, the quote from the video reminded me of this situation and I posted it as a response to the idea that children HAVE to know an absent parent loves them. Because there's this societal norm that insists a child needs the love of two parents, and if you take that to heart you're definitely going to mess up your kid.
Seriously. Just don't hide important things from kids, they're so much more resilient than people give them credit for and growing up with those hard lessons and a genuine loving hand to help through it will make them a healthy adult, rather than putting them in a snowglobe, isolated from the truth, bound to break when the truth hammer comes down
@@aff77141 I grew up without a father, I would see him once or twice a year until I was 7 and then he just vanished. Nobody ever talked to me about him and love at the same time and it always felt weird being with him, I knew he didn't love me or care about me that much, so when he disappeared it wasn't that bad. I remembered the first time he missed my birthday, I waited for him, and then christmas too, but after that it was pretty easy to let go. I knew he didn't love me and I've always known it's not my fault, it would've been more difficult growing up thinking he stopped loving me because of something I might have done, or finding out he never did. My family gave me all the tools I needed to understand the situation and I thank them for their honesty. People definitely don't give kids the credit that they deserve.
Note how Rachel was all, “I had to live with rats,” and “I know marriage isn’t in the cards for me,” aka a mix of rules for thee and not for me + I can only sympathize with my own experiences. Selfish smh.
Old story, and I feel like the comments have dissected this to death a lil bit, but the jump from “you’re 23, that’s an age you HAVE TO BE MOVED OUT BY and you’re disgusting and a burden for not doing that” to “Im 31 and I refuse to adhere by society’s expectations of my timeline for my life” would have been HILARIOUS if it wasn’t horribly privileged, Western-centric and just incredibly tone deaf
Also, i would LOVE LOVE LOVE for Ify to stop assuming that his immigrant family experience is THE immigrant family experience! 😊 bad takes all around, 0/10!
I don't think it is Western-Centric as in my country (Western), pretty common to still be living with your parents until you are 25-30 years old, especially with the prices of basic necessities and rent or a mortgage increasing exponentially.
Yeah it was disheartening. I was dealing with manic depressive episodes, severe anxiety and PTSD at 23. If I had moved out then I would not be alive right now. I was barely holding on when I had the support of my family directly behind me and around me. I cannot imagine the hell I would have been in dealing with the burdens I deal with now that I live alone. I would be dead or homeless in less than six months.
Iffy saying “i get shits hard right now but you gotta find a way” while he’s wearing a gold watch, a gold chain, and a gold ring, baffles me. You can tell both of the guests were sooooo entitled and had hand outs their whole lives and had it easy. They just assume everyone should be where they are in life and that’s hella sad. I mean Shayne’s cold slient stare screams volumes.
I don't know his story but even if he earned all his money he doesn't know that girl's live and her whole environment. I do not think her parents were crazy for asking her to move out and maybe the daughter didn't run the numbers once she could split a roomate. But going into on the route of "go live" as if money or better job offers will just appear because their parents need the space is crazy and gotta love how they just assume the daughter is pilling on the dollars and not helping in the house with anything even though not even OP mentioned that to make her case look better (which if she really was thinking she wasn't the asshole here I think it's a pretty good point to bring up)
idk i really dislike some of rachel's takes, even at damien's funeral roast her jokes bashing him for pursuing an autism diagnosis were just... and i know the jokes were cleared w damien but as another autistic person i couldn't get behind it.
@@tsukikiki23she honestly seems like the person who has to be the sob story. No one can have a harder life than her and everyone must feel bad for her.
I genuinely feel bad for Shayne here, especially during the 23 year old living with her parents still, because he tried so hard to get a word in edge-wise and kept getting talked over and I watched him struggle so hard with his non-confrontational personality while he had to sit there and listen to the two of them monologuing and basically trashing this poor girl. And for him to try and say "Hey we don't have a ton of information here so there could be reasons why" only to be met with "well when I first moved out yada yada yada" and being further talked over until they literally ran out of the same statements to repeat, Shayne is someone who is incredibly empathetic towards the people in a lot of stories they end up reading but this really emphasized just how much he tries to empathize with people. Also yeah no, to absolute GO IN on this poor 23 year old for not moving out of her parents house because she "needs to grow up" and then IMMEDIATELY go into the "there's no timeline for life and nobody's going to tell me when to do what" about the marriage vs. new child, like girl WHAT? Did you not JUST monologue for like 15-20 minutes over you trying to dictate another person not meeting a "timeline point"?!
as someone who is 23 and struggling to find employment, living in a black mold infested apartment, this episode was fucking awful. i would not be alive without the support of my dad because i would starve to death. i spend every second i'm not applying to jobs taking surveys for like $2 an hour. genuinely fuck everyone other than shayne in this episode i used to love ify but this made me really reconsider everything about him. absolutely will be avoiding that woman like the plague now too she's absolutely vile.
@edaaaah I'm 20 and I'm unemployed and finding it hard to find a job but even my parents would never pressure me as there is no right time to move out, you do it when your ready
I’m 24 and live at home still. It’s expensive out there and it’s much easier to simply split expenses with my parents than try to figure out a whole new thing with money I don’t have lol
Dude it's so crazy, I was literally doing projects and was playing this episode in the background around the "23 year old being forced to move out" story is when I was questioning why couldn't hear shayne speak- he's usually so talkative- I had to read the comments section TT__TT
The fact that she though that was a flex 😭😭😭 like who wants that?? I wouldn’t wanna have to “make it work” if it means sacrificing my well being for no reason. Like. What are we winning here? Independence with the side of the plague??
When she brought up the rats, I was shocked. Does she honestly think that the 23 year old should move out, most likely to a rat infested shithole, just because she herself struggled? Rachel just had the worst takes this episode.
Rachel describing her living conditions when she first moved out like girl… im sorry you lived with rats but that doesn’t mean other people should have to???
Right shes so confident that everything she says is correct. But ok just because your life and experience went a certain way doesn’t mean it will apply to everyone
Exactly. I'd expect that from someone a couple generations older. That mentality of "well, I had it bad so you should have to too." I thought the whole point was to try to make life better for your children. Also, I'm really hoping Ify's kid doesn't have any life problems that keeps them at home past his "expected timeline." It's just ridiculous. I remember being 23 and I had a debilitating medical condition at the time that made it to where I couldn't work and was house-bound. After several surgeries, I'm back on track with where I want to be in life now but dang, if I'd heard this back then, I would've felt hopeless. Thank God I had loving, empathetic parents who helped me through it both emotionally and financially.
rachel talking about how there “shouldnt be a timeline” during the story about the daughter and cousins, but also mocking a 23 year old for still living at home rly grinds my gears
Yeah, agreed... the grindset-mindset *reeked* in the 23yr old discussion. Why *would* you move out young (a really weird traditional expectation which is just crazy in this economy) to a worse off situation when you aren't being forced to? And yet, when it's about marriage and kids, also traditional expectations, folks have all the time in the world?
As a mother i can say that leaving your child home alone who is very young is not only irresponsible but also shows a lot of neglect. When you have friends telling you they will go to the store for you and you still choose to go yourself leaving your child alone that shows how much more she cared about going out then just staying home being a mom.
Read as "If they're not blood or didn't raise me, I don't have to listen to her or even try a dialogue with them..." Me: *starts counting fingers* teachers, siblings, people known as experts in their field, employers, anyone I've asked for advice on because I know I'm inexperienced in...
@@castleoffiction96 It read as an evil stepmom who the daughter was afraid of (For good reason she was confronted by The stepmom who completely disregarded her decision And harassed her into her room. Eh, 6 of 1
51:55 for anyone wondering. Ify normally has great family takes but what the fuck was he smoking on this one. I couldn't imagine my theoretical Step-Mom, who would be a handful of years older than me asking to step in on me and my Father's private conversation. One raised me and ones trying to replace me. Wtf.
Right! I can imagine the daughter feeling “kicked out”/“replaced” considering it’s because of the new baby.. I feel so sorry for her! 😢 And yes, the world IS crazy expensive. So that’s a fair point on its own either way. Anyway, she brought it up with someone she was comfortable with. And it’s not Step Moms right to argue with that.
As someone who’s watched everything in this series and been uncomfy with some tales this one was just… insufferably hard to watch. The takes in this were so bad and judgemental and hypocritical that they made me feel like shit as a victim of a very clear abusive relationship like the DIL story. Rachel really makes herself sound ignorant when she changes her opinions based off on what she wants to say to sound smart. How can you say “there’s no timeline for major lifetime events” then imply all young adults who can’t afford to move out our losers and burdens?
Also, you three are all privileged and live in La and have money so trying to talk down to people making minimum wage who literally can’t afford anything is not the hot take you think it is.
I was so excited to watch this, and I rarely if ever comment on videos, but I could not agree more! I was honestly DISGUSTED by some of the reactions in this. Like is this smosh or did I somehow accidentally watch a Joe Rogan taping.
She inadvertedly called a lot of people around the world losers and burdens. I mean, look at some countries where adults and their kids still live with their parents (I believe some places in India have that custom). I lived with my grandpa until I was like 22-23, the housing market was crap, I had too little income even if I found a space, I did help with rent/water/electricity even though he hadn't asked me to help, he didn't want me to help. That made me so disguisted. "Moving out" doesn't have s*it to do with "becoming an adult human". My sister has had 2 kids, and for the first couple of months, they slept in their parents room in their crib. So like, it's not like "Oh baby is coming in 6 months, we need to prepare space", you have time. My niece had her daughter when she lived in a 1-room small little place. They made it work just fine, a baby doesn't take much space (living wise, attention wise they take a lot of space).
"Girl you're 23" is so USA-centric it's insane to me. You don't know her financial situation, her psychological situation, you don't know nothing. A burden to her parents? His dad talked to her and agreed the best thing to do was to keep her in the house. Y'all spent a lot of time defending a bunch of 30 years olds in other stories 'cause other people wanted them to "grow up and act like adults" by saying that there is not a single way to be an adult and then say stuff like these?
also it's insane that they assumed she wasn't helping out at all? She could be paying rent, or maybe she does a lot of work around the house. Two months rent is nice, but not enough to live on for an extended period of time if her job doesn't pay enough, she still has to pay for groceries and gas too, that's also not counting any potential spend money so she's not just going to work and being at home all the time. Also don't know why they assumed she wasn't in school at all
@@colleen_marieexactlyyy 💀 also her saying something along the way "I struggle so you should too," abt moving out is so 😬 ... I just can tell she has a comfy and wide economic safety net from her parents/family.
@@colby_247in Latin America and Europe people don't move just because they're adults either. There's usually another reason, but it's not like "well, I'm 20 I have to leave the house"
For reallll, I live in Australia and at 23 its completely normal to live with family because most people stay at home through university. Like who can afford to move out while you're studying 😭
i’m 23 and just had to move back home. my dad wasn’t happy about it bc im an adult. then he saw how completely defeated and broken living in an expensive home with two roommates who were absolutely awful. everyone’s timelines are different and i wasn’t ready to move out. not everyone can “be a human adult,” which is a dick thing to say. idk. i’m unhappy with that take.
The human adult comment was really out of line. People have lots of issues and using that as a rubric for what is normal and acceptable is really immature.
From the moment she reworded Shayne saying “that’s a really nice way to say you’re a bitch Rachel” I was not expecting her takes to be good. As someone that lives in a place where multi-generational homes is a thing, I can’t imagine not living with my parents. Housing is expensive and pay rates are a bare minimum. She’s so out of touch. I’d rather be living here with my parents and sharing bills, than doing everything by myself living in a shithole apartment that costs $1650.
9:10 the thing that they’re all missing is the part about her being in a custody battle. The majority of kidnappings are by the other parent, family member or (coincidentally) close family friends. The OP was wrong but the fear of kidnapping originated from the fact that her friend is currently in a custody battle and if her ex tried to kidnap the kids it could be done easily.
“Kids should grow up thinking that their father loves them!” Should they? I grew up thinking that even though his behavior suggested otherwise, and it scarred and traumatized me to some points I’m still realizing
@@indys9005 this was exactly what I was thinking. Should they believe he still loves them and is there for them even tho he’s an absent parent and doesn’t give a shit? This is a HUGE L on Rachel
Same with my mom. Realizing that relationship was damaging to me and cutting her out of my life was when I finally starting growing into myself. The way they responded to that story...
honestly i wish rachel never would have done this episode because i see her so much differently now… i cannot stand people who are so loyal to family that they excuse their behavior/enable
Yeah, I'm never going [and this is my first time seeing her on Smosh btw] I'm never going to see her as anything better than this. It isn't a matter of differing opinions, it's a matter of I can not respect this person at all now. There's no chance to even gain respect, because this initial impression has completely broken that chance. Enabling and justifying the son here is just a huge yikes. Part of me feels sorry for her, cause there's a deep layer of repressed trauma that she seems to be a victim of there, but I just can not get around the fact that she is making these arguments.
It especially gives me whiplash when she then goes on to approve of kicking out the 23 year old daughter who clearly stated their financial issues and didn't even consider how they probably feel like they're getting replaced rn 🙃
Ive actually had really awful anemia, resulting in an emergency blood transfusion last year. It's impacted my life way more than folks here have said it does. It's not just cold fingers and needing to eat liver, for me its been heart palpitations and infusions. Still would never expect someone to change their plans like that for me, the fuck. It's clearly an excuse
Agreed. I was a little displeased with the flippant “cold fingers” comment, but seeing how the rest of the video was that was not the worse offense. Anemia can 100% affect your quality of life. But I’m this story it doesn’t sound like that is the case.
This girl is so far out there its crazy. How she keeps defending the deadbeat dad who cheated on his wife with his next wife is just mind boggling. My gawd.
The cognitive dissonance is astounding. To say 23 means you’re too old to live with your parents and then to immediately pivot: I’m in my thirties, I don’t plan to get married anytime soon there’s no need to place an age on a milestone. Like pick one, you’re either too old to have not met a “standard” cultural milestone in time and therefore pathetic or you’re not.
Honestly like how disconnected from reality are they? I don't know their circumstances but like don't they live in LA? I always thought it was expensive as hell there. I live in Sydney and to buy a one bedroom apartment you basically have to sell your soul, not to mention food prices have gone up too. I'm only 18, studying in Uni, and my degree takes 4 years. So by their logic in the one year after getting my degree I should have a high enough paying job to move out fully and buy my own place and support myself... like I'm so happy for you if that's possible but where for me the only way that's possible is if I just settle for a not great place and scrimp on everything. If your parents can afford to support you a little longer, why not save up money so you can actually set yourself up for a successful future instead of settling for wasting your money and putting yourself in debt. You're just creating a mountain to climb later on and all you get out of it is faux societal validation... Just goes to show how important it is to value the idea of perspective. People come from different places in life... I really don't see the point it judging them for that.
@@notaspeck6104I think I should add some context for how crazy living in California is, not just LA. California in general, most apartments are like $1800-$2000+ a month (la is probably significantly higher), to rent you need double the income of rent, you need a good credit score, on top of that, there's added expense with utilities, on top of food, transportation, etc. So like most of the people I know either live with 2+ roommates or live with their parents. It's completely normal to live with your parents at 23 and this mentality coming from people who live in LA is insane to me. Like you know how expensive life can be, so judging someone for them living with their parents is so upsetting.
i know that rachel had the worst takes and ify had one bad take, but rachel and ify going back and forth on the skipping son’s wedding story really wowed me. every part of rachel’s take on that story made me so angry, and ify giving his side of it instead of her just spewing made me happy
Same, i thought i was taking crazy pill for a hot sec. IMO it was pretty plain to see for everyone why he did what he did and it was very much understandable.
After her third rant in excess of a minute I was like ight she doesn't exist anywhere near this family so it'd be nice if she stopped talking because Gramps already did the right thing.
I can at least say this: Rachel is good at discussion. Not once did she cut off Ify or cop any sort of tude or fire back in a manner that wasn’t passive. Even though her takes were very iffy and easily disagreeable, we can at least admit she is good at seeing other sides. Personally, I feel like someone who is open to other opinions/actually listens to other opinions despite a bad take is overall better than someone who always has decent takes but can never listen to opinion. Ify had some damn good takes though and that’s for certain
I was thinking it's rediculous they left their kids. Your a mother, take ur kids with u. My parents had 8 kids at home, but the oldest was like 16. But these kids are so young
Listening to Rachel continuing her take on the dad not going to his wedding is killing me!!!! I'm glad to hear Ify prioritise the kids' wellbeing and Shayne giving good neutral takes!
Plus, it's just basic human decency. The dad's son is a piece of shit, sure, granted. But the mother is still a human being, and had to be feeling extremely abandoned and scared for their future, even with the parents getting her and her kids an apartment. Sure, the dad should always normally go to their child's wedding whenever possible, but in this case the son didn't deserve his father there. I just hope the son's new wife finds out sooner rather than later what kind of guy she married, because she's very likely in for the same sort of situation that his ex-wife is now in.
@@chanson8508 I think she also failed to see that the man is clearly abandoning his previous wife as if she’s trash, like all the responsibilities he is supposed to carry is just dumped on the poor woman. Plus there were also hints that he is clearly a very very selfish man, with him saying he only wants things on HIS terms and rather than speaking and talking it out with his family. Also with the point about demonising the father, i think it’s worse to give hope to the children and then them finding out the truth about their father. I would rather grow up with the truth than to live in a lie. But maybe that’s my take on it.
“Like a child waited until she got her dad alone” are you insane? We’re shaming her and calling her a child now because she wanted to talk to her parent and explain her feelings in private?????? These guests are awful and lack all empathy
Like that’s her dad of course she just wants to talk to him not his new wife who’s only ten years older than her and trying to push her out of her home
Literally why would she even have the conversation with the woman 10 years older than her who thinks she calls the shots on her life instead of with her actual parent she started living with while stepmom was still a child? That was such a fucking weird take among a sea of weird takes. And it's just pretty messed up how his entire justification on why that was low is just that gross thing of infantilizing fathers and "oh you know we can't say no to our daughters" like the fathers aren't the one who should be the responsible parent when it comes to conversations with their daughters.
The stepmom isn’t her parent in any way, shape or form. She doesn’t get to decide anything for the stepdaughter. Also, a baby needs to sleep in the parents’ room to protect it from cot death. It takes up no space.
was listening to this on spotify got on youtube to see what the response to this was becauseShayne felt absent the whole episode and now I can see why from his facial expressions this is a hard watch holy shit
As a 23 year old who is in grave danger of having to move back in with my parents because I can't afford school and rent working full time... this hurt
No one is saying don’t live with your parents. However u need boundaries. Especially if your parents aren’t well off. & you should also be aware that you do lose some type of independence. But as long as u both can live together comfortably, there’s no problem with living w/ parents
@eemahknee thank you for the vote of confidence, I had lived with my parent up until recently and we'd be alright. However I do think they are saying in the video I shouldn't be living with my parents and my existence is a burden to them if I have to which is just a rough take
@@siobhandrown885 I can see why you would feel this way. You would only be a burden if you are making things harder for your parents. If u don’t do house chores, if u don’t try to help w/ bills, making messes, break things.. you’re parents are giving u a place to stay so u have to help out in some way I personally feel. I hope things work out for u & don’t be discouraged by social media. Do whatever makes you both happy.
You aren't the only person in this situation. Most of my friends and I all had to move back in too. It's really tough out there for so many of us. You're doing your best and it is more than enough.
Don't listen to the stupidity in this video! Life is hard and I'm so glad you have a safety net for when things get ugly. Good for you! You'll get where you want to be
The entitlement coming from these two when talking about the 23-year-old. Just ridiculous. The daughter clearly did not feel comfortable talking with the step mother and told the dad about the situation. And even after that, the step mom went on and comfort the daughter. Clearly, the step mother crossed that boundary and it seems like she attacked the daughter from the daughter's perspective even after telling no once.
I come back every so often to this one because I sometimes convince myself that it wasn't THAT bad. But, boy howdy, it WAS that bad. I can see why neither one was invited back.
Sorry you lived in a rat infested basement Rachel, but as a 20 something I’m gonna live with my mom and do the chores she asks in the comfort of my childhood bedroom! We shouldn’t rush milestones, right? Or is that just about weddings not moving out.
I'm 20 and my sister is 22. We both live with our mum in our childhood home. We give her money for food, electricity etc. We do chores. Our house is big enough to house the 3 of us and if my sister and i wanted to start our own families there would still be enough room for everybody. Neither of us are planning on moving out any time soon and that is completely normal.
literally like as a 20 year old her response was mind blowing. like between being a student and having a job im doing my best, but to belittle a 20-something for living at home, then telling her rat-infested horror story is wild to me. i don’t know a better way to say it but like…that seems like a personal, familial thing on her end. her rat-infested horror story is the exact reason people are scared to move out, and many parents would do a lot to help out before letting their kids move into that situation. so condescending to repeatedly refer to the op as “kids,” because they’re comfortable in her family home, and aren’t under any heavy pressure to move out
@@cdrew555 and like... if she has experienced how bad it can be, why would she wish that on other people? Why does she want other young adults to have to live like that if we have the better option of living with our parents?
As someone who left home at 17 (abusive home) if you feel safe and comfortable enough to stay and save....fucking do it. There is no glory in struggle that hard
As someone who struggled after having to leave home early, Rachels whole "i struggled so should you" energy was so infuriating, dont even get me started with how she was defending that deadbeat piece of crap, my blood was boiling I feel like she grew up around people who were victim-blamers 😓
Her take on the father not attending the son's wedding was so fucking infuriating too. That pos son CLEARLY abused that poor woman, not only cheated on her. It's literally a fact that he FORCED her to become a sahm- there is no scenario in the world where that wouldn't be an abuse situation
sorry for the fricking essay, but here goes: for real, i was on the verge of tears. I had to move out way earlier than I was ready for because my parents suddenly decided to move far away. I tried staying with them, but it isolated me completely from my old social life and made going to uni much more difficult, so I had to move out. My parents never considered me a burden. I probably could've lived there until I was 30. My sister was encouraged to leave home early because she constantly wanted to do her own thing without taking us into account (like coming home at 3am during the week, waking up my parents who are light sleepers) and got very argumentative when my parents tried to set boundaries regarding that behaviour. I didn't have any of that since I was much more introverted, so my parents had no problem with me still living with them. And I didn't see a reason to move out either: uni was only 20 minutes away, and living on my own would just create a ton of extra work for me next to my studies in terms of chores that were now just divided over the family. Being neurodivergent, having to take care of everything by myself is one of the most exhaustive things I have ever had to do. My parents moved in together right out of their parents' homes, they never had to take care of everything by themselves, they are sometimes completely oblivious to how hard this shit is for me despite being neurodivergent themselves. I still struggle with the trauma of my parents suddenly moving right after I also came back home from a traumatic exchange which left me utterly homesick. It's like I never really came home and every kind of comfort has just been ripped away from me. I feel like Rachel and Ify are also just totally insensitive to the fact that some people (especially neurodivergent people) need more time before they're ready to move out and handle life on their own. ffs man, I really fucking hated their takes.
For Rachel to say that it’s time for the 23 year old to move out and then in the VERY NEXT STORY say something along the lines of “there is no timeline to abide too” lmfaoo what. Heavy privilege talking, not everyone can afford to move out at the same time.
I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with my gf as my roommate essentially and we can barely afford it. I make just over 40K and she makes right around 40K I believe and we still struggle on certain months. Not even considering hobbies, groceries, travel, etc. I left my parents for my own reasons but if a father and daughter are cool living together in this economy, I applaud them !
@ glad to report is has ! We’ve upgraded to a two bedroom. Currently saving for a house and adopted our sweet sweet dog Skywalker a few months ago ! But it’s a lot of hard work and communication between me and the Mrs. But that’s life !
Rachel gives hard white knight vibes - only progressive in words, not in thought (in this case, not in words either, but judging by the other story that's what she aims for)
@@Amy-se8vqlegit. 24 here, and still living with family, AND i’m constantly battling the thoughts of being a burden. their comments made me so incredibly angry.
I was doing something else while watching this and I started to hear the bad takes so I looked over and Shayne looked like he wanted to crawl in a hole and die. Same brother!
The way Rachel immediately laughs at the fact that this 23 year old is still living with their family 44:22 is so gross to me. She's instantly looking down on this person because they are not financially stable enough to live on their own. I don't think I could last 5 minutes being in the same room as her, I couldn't even finish this video because her opinions upset me so much
She seems to chuckle in condescension at most of the stories. "That's not how science works." You mean that's not how genetic combinations work? Quite an annoying person trying to present as sweet.
honestly i thought she did the quick maths and read 33 year old wife and i was like damn that was perceptive but no... not to beat a dead horse but saying i moved out before then so everyone else should too... ridiculous
this was a hard watch. i’ve never seen this episode til now and i see why : ( like everyone else, this story 51:41 (about the step daughter) was just… wow. you can preach being all for being family oriented and still feel this way? it’s truly heartbreaking.
As a 22 year old living with family, I cannot imagine someone 10 years older then me trying to push me out of the house when I can’t afford it Also the assumption the daughter wasn’t helping around the Blair is wild
Exactly! Like just because the step mom (who wrote the post) didn’t say if she contributed or not doesn’t mention she doesn’t! If she’s in a situation like mine she probably does some cleaning, cooking, contributing to the household fund, etc. Why did they immediately assume she’s some mooch?
Its the fact that they were willing to literally help her with 2 months rent and help find a roommate and all that, and she has a full time job, and yet she still is like no i dont want to move out that shows that she's unwilling to become an adult and wants to keep mooching off her father, and pulling her father aside away from the step-mother is really shady
@@noahtrombley3339 i don't know where they live, but in my city even when you get a two room flat and get a roommate you have to pay up to 600 bucks. Just for your split. And your room is as big as a closet. Two months of rent won't save anything, especially when you have to pay deposit. We don't know what the daughter situation is, how much she gets payed if she is in an apprenticeship etc. But the economic situation is awful rn, especially in my country you will have to pay ridiculous amounts for gas and energy rn. We don't know how far she lives from her workplace, how she gets there etc. I think it's just not a good way to handle it. Just have the babys crib in the parents room or living room (that's how alot of familys used to do to that when you couldn't afford a bigger home for your growing family) and for the first some years try to figure out a play and get moving. But kicking her out, out of the blue with just some months time of eviction is absolute bullocks.
Ngl, this episode had some of the absolute worst takes in it yet. I've watched all of these so far and I normally agree or at least get their point of view of the cast, but I cringed so hard at some of their assumptions and responses. News flash: putting yourself in a crappy spot and sacrificing yourself so others feel better about their shitty behavior is not always the right move. It especially got me when they said the kids should grow up thinking their father loves them even if he doesn't. That is just encouraging generational trauma. As someone who's father very much should not've been a part of my childhood, it's not healthy to do that to those children. The empathy is really in the wrong places in this video. I mean, they didn't stop for even a second to consider that the 23 year old who was told to move out probably felt like they were getting replaced. Between the stepmom and then being kicked out for a new baby to take their room? It must've crossed their mind that their father is just building a new family that doesn't include them and the stepmom solidified that because instead of discussing solutions she just told her to get out and that's that. The cast this time, instead of even considering the kids perspective, just ASSUMED they're a burden who is financially taking advantage of their father. This whole video gives me the ick 🙃
they called her immature for wanting to stay in her childhood home while the parents can't sacrifice their space to put a crib in their room? The baby's not even born yet and she has to give up the years that could help her get some actual stability. She's not the one who chose to have a baby.
Same. I've been absolutely enjoying this series, but this is the first time one of these videos pulled me out of what I was doing (I put these on as background noise) and scroll down to the comments to see if anybody else was thinking what I was thinking.
Rachel, girl, family first isn’t always the best policy. When you have toxic family members, sometimes supporting that person ISN’T the right move. Actions 👏🏼 have 👏🏼 consequences 👏🏼.
PREACH!! T H A N K YOU for saying this! I have a diagnosed malignant narcissist brother that's always acting this way (same as the person in this story), and he does NOT need to be awarded support for his bad behavior. Rachel, I would love for you to meet my trash can of a brother. He may flip the script on your views a bit. I know he sure killed my empathy meter for me.
My dad literally had sex with his gf in front of me. Didn't apologize and blamed me, doesn't think he was in the wrong. Blamed my brother for the divorce since he showed my mom evidence of him cheating. Thinks my brother "brainwashed" us into hating him. I could write a book on all the shit he's done. Literally the worst part is that he can't even conceive the thought he could be in the wrong. He charged is gf's daughter extra for toilet paper for using more because she has crohn's disease.
She's from Texas. As someone also from Texas, a lot of people here are raised with the "family is everything" mentality, and it can be very hard to break. I lucked out because my parents were not from here and don't have that view, but OMG, the number of people here who do is kinda scary.
Defending the deadbeat son/father and saying “family is everything” then turning around and wanting the stepdaughter to get kicked out of her house is absolutely crazy. That gave me whiplash. If you’re going to have awful takes, at least be consistent.
I’m so sick of the whole “well I suffered so you should too” mentality. There was no mention of the daughter not helping out around the house or being difficult to live with it’s purely because they were having a baby. I feel like it would be fair to try and work something out but clearly there was more to that story. For Rachel to say “you’re not an actual human adult until you move out” is insane. Also having a full time job doesn’t explain anything about how much money she makes or how long ago she left school. Also seeing how she defended that pos as if his family shouldn’t hold him accountable, I just know that if it was a step son the reaction would have been different. I hated them talking over Shayne but makes sense why he doesn’t usually let other people read because it’s harder to redirect and moderate
I remember watching some episodes of this Reddit series initially and being like “wow I love how these are so chill and these people take time to form opinions and talk about things thoroughly and understand if they’re complicated”, and now we’re here lmao
@@HeyMayais Yeah-(I should’ve used a tone tag lol), I wasn’t referring to that necessarily! Just more that oof this whole series is comprised of at worst decent overall takes, and mostly of well thought out discussions, but here it was like a slap in the face of the opposite in a really frustrating/tense manner(my original comment was intended to be a joking tone!) Although I would’ve preferred Shane give some pushback, letting the guests dig their own hole seemed like the better outcome in this instance honestly. /gen /neu /lh
@@sunshineeee ok take this however you wish to but know its meant in good faith - what the FUCK are those tone indicators???? i get that s/ means sarcastic or whatever and /j means like joke but at what point are we confusing people more than clarifying intent? NOT EVEN TO MENTION that some people use /s as serious? theyve become too fkn disparate and decentralized to mean anything to more than just chronically online people so im sorry i have no idea what they mrean
I've been binging these and have had a fun time with all the episodes, and haven't even looked at the comments, BUT this episode frustrates me so much that I can't even finish it. Such a shame. Feel like this one could've (maybe even should've been) cut before being posted. Some of these takes are not just wild, but also extremely insulting
Seriously I think shane was literally just as uncomfortable as everyone watching are with the takes. Considering he’s extremely quiet this episode and doesnt seem to add much almost implying he doesn’t want to argue about it. Just sorta two people I dont want to see on this show again because they just don’t seem to understand the significance of the situations.
seriously I feel bad now after watching like half of it, they should at the very least put a warning on it because this is really unhealthy for anyone who has had issues with these sort of things
SAME. I've been going through all of them as my current content binge and I've never once went to the comments until this episode. This one was so bad it stopped me half an hour in.
I'm glad I'm not the only person who thinks "if the guests have a bad take and try to demonize a good intentioned person while shayne sits quietly because he definitely disagrees then i'm not finishing the video"
I feel like they were putting too much emphasis on the fact that it’s a wedding. People usually do that because it’s a once in a lifetime event but when it’s the second one it’s not as important anymore. Regardless the son was still in the wrong for that so I wouldn’t have gone either way.
@@dontmisunderstand6041 exactly! If you’re in a good and healthy relationship, good for you, you can legit just go to the courthouse and be done. Dude’s son is a shit head for thinking (1) that a marriage THAT EARLY in your adulthood will work out and (2) that his ex wife is supposed to be a stay at home mom just because it suits his view of what a relationship is supposed to be. I’d spend the day with my family members ex/parent to that family members children just to make sure they don’t do anything that could ruin their life or their kids lives and to make sure they’re in a healthy place mentally especially since she is in a town where she has little to no family of her own to help get her through this VERY RECENT and VERY HEAVY rough point in her life.
I've been binging these reddit stories for a few days now and every episode I catch myself thinking: "these people are so cool and so smart and so funny and just genuinely good human beings and I want to be friends with all of them!" and then there's this one... I paused the video to come check the comments to make sure it wasn't just me that was getting mad.
“Girl you’re 23” as someone struggling with severe anxiety regarding my age and the fact that i don’t have my life figured out the way i hope i would’ve that sent me in a tail spine. The complete lack of empathy from Rachel the entire episode was mind blowing. Thank you for the anxiety attack though. 10/10
Yeah I'm kinda in the same boat as you. I'm someone who has the same fears and doubts about not having my "life together", and im about to be 23. Even though I KNOW its okay, even though my mom keeps telling me im young and its normal. Its these kinds of comments from others that reel my fears and doubts back to me. So yeah. Rachel? Shut up. Glad to see so many people against her shaming a 23 year old for not moving out. Makes me feel better and seen.
I'm 25 with anxiety, depression and eating disorders and I'm still with my parents because I needed time to find treatment that works for me. Only now after 3 years of proper treatment for the first time in my life I'm getting close to being able to move out but i still have some work to do. It's ok that you are still with your parents, that you are still figuring things out. Ignore what she said because it sounds like she comes from a very ignorant and narrow minded point of view. Take the time to figure things out it's ok to take time. You are not alone
I whole heartedly disagree that you “can't live your life to the fullest” until you've left the home. To a LOT of people, family is everything. You should never feel embarrassed for not feeling ready to ”leave the nest.” 23 is young. Your brain has only just finished growing. Although I think it's beneficial to live on your own/with roommates, don't feel ashamed if that path isn't for you.
That whole “my life was hard so yours should be too” is the exact mentality that brought us to where we are today. It isn’t “building character.” It’s imposing generational trauma.
We are/were kids, we aren’t supposed to be strong, we aren’t supposed to be getting tough, we aren’t supposed to be ‘building character’. We’re supposed to be safe, we’re supposed to be protected, we’re supposed to have a better life than the generation before us. I could go more in-depth abt this or abt my own parent pet-peeves, but I’ll keep this short and simple for anyone reading this. Remember the sections above, and whenever you reflect on how you were raised and start siding with your parents’ reasoning, just remember what you read one time on the internet in a random RUclips comment. They were supposed to make your life better than theirs. You were supposed to be safe, not strong. You were just a kid.
@@BB-TheCandleFairy May have the wording slightly wrong, but " [His son's mother]'s trying to protect him from the world. I'm trying to prepare him for the world. If he cannot handle me raising my voice to get his attention to see the bigger picture, he is not ready for a world that does not care about his feelings" - Gabriel Iglesias. Also, "Great men are forged in fire" - John Hurt. All of which to say, there are different styles of parenting for a reason. You want to be a shield, fine. But don't villify those who beleive in challenging their children, with real life if necessary
@@castleoffiction96 There's a difference between "real life" and "sharing a mattress with rats". The anecdotes Rachel has are not transferable to any sort of life lesson, and not wanting to move out because you know you're not ready is not an indicator that you're soft.
I would not say just cause one life was rough so should another but postponing your life waiting for things to be good is only going to stagnate your life. I mean real life is rarely going to be easy so if you are only waiting for things to be good or easy it's only going to postpone your life, which just seems rough. Wanting to stay at home to save money makes sense but if that person isn't paying rent or contributing to the household then they can't be upset that the home owners find themselves in a situation in which they can't continue the way things are going either.
@@castleoffiction96 if life is going to challenge them no matter what, then we don't need to put kids through unnecessary pain?? Making your kids childhood hard is only going to make it more difficult for them to be adults, having been a kid who experienced a lot of challenges, life would have been a lot easier if I could at least look back on good times. If anything, putting your kids through messed up stuff just makes it harder for them to deal with difficult things as an adult, you're breaking down their foundation, not building it up.
Rachel’s take on the daughter in law story is just wrong. I can’t be bothered to delve into every layer of it but it’s just wrong. Op’s son very clearly cheated. Op was right for not going to his son’s wedding. Also the daughter in law HAD NO ONE ELSE. Op explicitly pointed out how she didn’t have anyone else mainly because of his son.
Also, OP's son is clearly being abusive. He's isolated his ex (she has no friends or support system in town), expecting her to be the maid-cook-nanny-sex object. OP didn't say it in the main post, but you can see it in the comments from OP and in the main story it's heavily implied. The kids shouldn't be with OP's son. He doesn't care about them and OP is doing what his son should have done.
@@sotrue5413 and it was nice to see Iffy subtly call her out on not seeing the difference between familial support versus enabling destructive behavior.
All she does is defend a literal abuser because he’s “family” BUT SO IS THE DIL AND HER KIDS!!! She became family the SECOND those kids were born, not to mention the son is abusive to DIL and she just IGNORES ALL OTHER OPINIONS she doesnt like. My opinion of her as a person has dropped significantly, and i hope nobody in her life has this issue and tries to come to her for support, because i know she’ll just make things worse
i’ve been binging all the reddit vids but this one was not it. i loved all the others bc rachel had me pretty heated. how can you literally say “don’t put a timeline on milestones” then IMMEDIATELY shit on a 23 yr old girl for still living at her dad’s place? fucking wild to me ALSO she straight up was enabling neglect when it was ab that deadbeat cheater.
This! I started watching it recently and have been binging it. Until now I loved every guest (even if I didn't agree with everything they said), but this episode... geez. I'm happy this was not the first one I saw or I wouldn't keep watching.
!!! And then to acknowledge the cultural aspect of the 23 year old and still argue about it?? Sorry about your experience but the dad clearly has no problem with HIS daughter staying so why are you so angry about it? The parents are old enough to plan for a baby and it’s their responsibility to make space for it, the stepdaughter shouldnt be suddenly put out and pushed aside because of poor planning on their part. I can’t even finish it now which is so sad bc i also love all the others
Same here. I was actually listening to this while doing my laundry and I'm side eyeing most of the time and I definitely notice Shane's silence. I immediately check the comments after I finished my laundry and I'm really glad everyone seems to agree that this episode is a bit weird. But then again, its still nice that they still uploaded this and didn't edit it as much because again, this is about discussion and ofcourse we can disagree or agree about it.
Hi! Came all the way from listening on Spotify because I needed to comment one thing. Fuck Rachel's hypocritic opinions. The way she spoke about everything was exhausting. You're doing great though Shane keep being you
Shayne's silence during the 23 y/o girl speaks volumens about Ify's and specially Rachel's shitty takes. He tried to talk a few times but Ify's and Rachel didn't let him, so he decided to better keep the peace and let them talk. And I get him, aganst these kind of people is better to be quiet, because is like talking to a wall. Really hope they never out them again on another episode.
![I.N "HALLUCINATION" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/n5B5q1Hwt_U/mqdefault.jpg)
Damn, Rachel... girl, you need therapy, and lots of it. Family can be toxic. Having a relationship with abusive family members is NOT a moral imperative. And just because you struggled, doesn't mean everyone else should struggle.
Ify, too, some of his comments...
Shayne's uncharacteristic silence this episode was soooo telling! Kudos to him for making it through it lol
He was so silent in the 23yr step daughter story. Just watching his reactions you could tell he was pissed at their entitled reasonings
@@Knightimous yes! Completely agree with this. The takes on that story was soooo entitled! And ignorant!
Yeah Shane's body language said everything. He was uncomfortable with those responses.
@@ShortSnorlaxx Fine to not agree with their take but you all are absolutely misusing the word entitled.
@M Durham what is a better word then? They clearly are entitled, but probably delusional, too.
I'm really relieved by the comments for once. Rachel's responses in this episode truly shocked me. You don't choose toxic people over their victims, just because they're family.
The grandkids are family too, but even if they weren’t blood, it wouldn’t matter. I completely agree with what you say.
this whole episode was like 100% bad takes, they shamed people for not being moved out at 23, like I know people in their 30's still at home either due to a lack of well-paying opportunities or for continued education, not to mention it *does* seem like stepmom there wants a perfect single family without step-daughter by the way she talks
@@Brett276 agreed. There were so many ignorant opinions shared on this one
I agree! I couldn’t believe how much she was trying to give the guy the benefit of the doubt when he was clearly extremely toxic!
@@Brett276 not to mention some cultures normalize a big/extended family under one roof which is more common than you think so really it's more than normal in mamy cases
If you tell a child that their father loves them while he neglects them, they will grow up thinking that love can look like neglect. It is more important for them to be able to recognize love than to believe that their father loves them.
precisely. when she said, "they need to know that their father loves them," i was a little stunned. if he doesnt love them, youll be lying to them and causing so much damage. better to show them that their mom and aunty and grandparents love them even if their father does not.
especially since kids can tell. knowing innately one thing is true and then being gaslit into thinking the opposite is not healthy for anyone and especially a kid. it just leads to confusion and frustration. in this scenario, the best thing to do is to not pretend. don't tell them their father doesn't care about them, but don't tell them he does. show your love for them 5x as much as the father should have.
PERIOD
Yeah Rachel had dog shit takes 100%. Like what the hell was this whole video
Finally! Someone who understands
“Family before everything” until they’re a 23 yo living at home 💀💀
I guess she meant “Family before everything only if they’re toxic and victimise people” 😂
It’s very obviously a money issue. Leaving your young children in an unlocked house is fine if you live in a nice area, but if they lived in a council estate they wouldn’t feel the same way. When you have money and your son cheats, you can’t abandon him! But I guarantee if the son had money and the dad was the poor one it would flip. Family before everything until that family member can’t afford to move out, then it’s your responsibility as a parent to force them out. These two grew up in average working class homes and think they have the right to speak on actually impoverished peoples lives because of it. I guarantee neither have given a cent to charity despite their riches.
Right?? Totally f*cked up
They were still supporting her, not kicking her out of the family.
@@FortheBudgies but they were kicking her out of the house
“Why would this person not move out” “I moved out when I was this age” proceeds to tell us the most horrific living conditions that no one would ever want to live with.
Thats what i was thinking. Like??? Why would that person want to leave if thats the sht happening
Because you have to upgrade yourself from the flat.
Older you become it’ll be more difficult to make the first step because all your friends are at level 2 or 3.
Life is step by step.
@@nbdy.namedmakii the point was that it's possible to do that and many MANY ppl have to, but this new mom needs a room for her baby.
@@saekubo3795 no, it isn't, there is no mile marker, no finish line, everyone has their own pace, get over it
Also if you stay at home, work towards a career, and save money, you can actually get a decent living situation sooner
@@ellielou52 aka replacing her stepdaughter with her new perfect single family
Why does she keep defending the deadbeat cheater?? I kept thinking “good for the dad for taking a stance!! The dude that married his mistress is a POS!” I agreed 100% with the dude making all the good points
And according to his mother, he pretty much bailed on his kids.
Literally when she said “This is actually really difficult.” I was like “No, not really.”
Probably like her dad lmao
She has Daddy issues
My problem with the 23 year old story is that the two go on about how they moved out early, and in the VERY NEXT STORY they say people shouldn't be on a timeline when it comes to something big like marriage, and how nobody should be pressured. Make up y'alls minds
It's the fake acceptance for me. The fake "well you don't need to abide by a timeline" but they just shat on adults living at home. Like y'all are so indecisive about your takes and judged so many people in one breath, but then followed up with the fake acceptance. And the reason it comes off as fake is because they were so adamant about people moving out at a certain age, but then try to sound accepting by saying there's no timeline for people. Clearly there is to Y'ALL judgemental asses. That take annoyed tf outta me. 🙄
AGREED. AGREED. AGREED.
It’s whiplash!! Rachel was also all about “don’t disown or throw away family” when talking about the asshole son who cheated on his wife! But then when a father doesn’t want to kick out his daughter the daughter needs to grow up and get kicked out? Like SHUT UP!!
I’m sure Rachel got whiplash from changing opinions so fast
This comment is dumb . Not everything is black and white . There is always a grey area
What works for one situation doesn't work for every situation
shane being dead silent during certain opinions shared during this actually speaks volumes. he was definitely mentally disagreeing with a lot of what was being said but didn’t want to start up anything bc of how opinionated and defensive things were shared.
I noticed that as soon as they went "SHES 23!!" and expected her to move out. He was completely silent and obv disagreeing so much. I really wish he felt comfortable disagreeing with them
this! i was like is he still there?? that never happens!
I ran to the comments to comment about the wedding story and saw this comment, omg his face as they talk is priceless
The absolute whiplash of going from "move out, youre 23, grow up." To " theres no timeline on life milestones blah blah blah." Was WILD.
Not gonna lie, I saw it as, “you wanted to get with an older guy for his money, but realized you are with an older guy who is broke and are now stuck”!
I was dying listening to this
Right? Gave me whiplash 💀
glad i wasnt the only one that noticed this lmfaooo
Honestly came across a tad bit privileged to me, such life changing decisions don't work for everyone at the same point of their lives. I don't like that they were so judgmental of the girl like that at all
"If you cheat on your wife does that mean you can never have a relationship with your father again?" Took me OUT. Like that is completely unrelated to the conversation here and feels like Rachael grasping at straws to get the conversation back into her favor. Girl accept you had a bad take and accept that sometimes actions have consequences even when you're family
YES. This felt so desperate like "please someone agree with me". I feel a little bad for how torn apart she is in these comments, but it's clear that she has a lot of growth to do. Her takes were NOT GOOD here, and I honestly think a lot of them felt like they came from a very privileged position - it's clear she's never had to deal with cutting off a family member, and arguing for the abuser in these situations is so incredibly harmful.
@@annacompton9362That's what I was thinking! She mentioned before that she's VERY loyal to her family, so she's honestly never had to deal with this sort of stuff before.
Sounds like she has some toxic relatives that she has to defend all the time.
lmao. Read this just as she said it.
i'd been absent mindedly binging these episodes while working but this line is what made me snap to complete attention and check the comments. her takes were making me a little uncomfortable (especially her previous comment "i'm EXTREMELY loyal to family!" made me 😬) but something about that line, man... like... he betrayed the trust of the MOTHER OF HIS CHILDREN, op's grandchildren, WHO IS FAMILY i might add, and rachel is like "he needs help :(" as if they haven't been trying to help him his whole life. no, the EX WIFE needs help. yeesh
It's so crazy how hard Rachel can ride the "Do anything for family" train and then immediately pivot to "If you're 23 you should be moving out and struggle"... Anyone else clock that?
this made me so mad! Girl stfu the economy is shit and you have no idea where these people live what their finances are like or if this person is mentally ready to be out on their own. What about full-time students? My mom allowed my brother to live at home until he was practically done with Med. school because it takes so long, and if he wanted to stay longer she would have no problem.
Definitely!!!! I’m from Germany and study in Munich, rent in Munich even with a roommate or several is still crazy, even with a full time job. And the waitlist for college dorms is extremely long. Just because they had the opportunities and resources to do that, to do “mushrooms in a zoo” doesn’t mean that everyone else does. They are being incredibly ignorant.
@@caseyengland14 i wouldn't be surprised if she's still getting financial help from fam being that young and living in LA
Bruh im the second to youngesr of 4. And all but my younger sibling moved out shortly after turning 18. Like that is normal to me and my culture. At 20 its TIME, and if you're making it into your mid 20s thats usually due to like a health concern or because you had a rough break. Like moving back in for a short time if something goes to shit is fine. But moving out between 16 and 20 is pretty much expected
And just to add. Im not saying thats healthy, but that's just where its at in my culture. The oldest person i knew living at home lived there until thwy could buy their own place at like 25. Working fulltime since they were 18
As a 24-year-old who still lives with my parents, this is the closest to gaslit I've ever felt until I looked at the comments 😬
SAME HAHAHAHA
Yes this was a crap episode. It’s hard out there. Especially after what Covid did to the economy.
@@Beth-pm9kcif you look at a chart (found out from a mystery podcast) of inflation. Around 2019 it goes from a slow incline to just a roller coaster ride going straight up
Are you living at home when a new baby is coming and there are only 2 bedrooms? What would you do if that was happening? It's the crying to daddy that is embarrassing.
@@FortheBudgies the baby will sleep with the parents or in their room for the first few weeks and then they can stay in another room. I honestly don't know about the 23year old but if she had autism or some mental illness then I could see the argument for why the kid couldn't share that room if they actually consider her a fully functioning adult.
Clearly there's a lack of communication, trust and or understanding between the trio.
The point is you can make it work if people are trying to solve problems instead of shift responsibility to the burden of one to solve.
Not having enough "rooms" or working on getting a better life situation (a 3 bedroom) for all of them tells me that they're not very collaborative individuals. plus it's on the parents for preparing their kids to move out with little things like low rent, a split of bills, building credit etc. Ease them into it or atleast give them a boot camp. Making an excuse that you have no time or that it isn't your job is not very adult and especially irresponsible. It's okay to admit you don't have those skills but it is childish to refuse to gain them or train them
2 months rent and a sticky note that says Goodluck with no skills is a bandage/participation Trophy for poor parenting in work. Sink or swim is for birds with higher bouncy and we wouldn't go kicking people off of clifts telling them to fall or fly. That's murder. Just because some people grab a branch or fall into some net doesn't mean that most people survive.
If you get the same results in life from sleeping on your parents couch vs sleeping on some strangers couch (a stranger who'll potentially take advantage of you or remind you of how much of a burden you are to them) ends up being the same, then you need the guidance and help to get better at working with people. Something parents are supposed to teach you.
But honestly there are so few adults and parents. People all seem to act like children waiting for other children to pretend that they're the most adult so they can go "nuh huh."
She's really just the AH for asking strangers on the internet to raise her kid, step mom or not.
My favorite part is at the end when Shayne says "I'm sure you disagree with us." He knew. He knew what was coming in the comments.
Exactly. She had a conversation with her parent and they're trashing her. This is coming from a place of privilege. The step mom is old enough to be her sibling, disgusting. Step was trying to throw her out and it's obvious.
I thought the same he's literally never said that in one of these LOL
@@Gamfluentshut up
the way it cut over to them when he said that and they're just looking at him like "wait what do mean controversial"💀 i have never seen anyone be so tone deaf on smosh, iffy was okay for most of it, but she really does not understand that people could have different life experiences 😭
1:14:23
The dad who skipped the wedding is NTA. I can’t stand when a cheaters family just pretend like everything is cool just to keep the peace. Good for them for supporting her and their grandkids.
And let’s be clear. 2 wives before 24? That idiot is gonna do it again.
Oh my god, my cousin got divorced from his wife of 12 years last year because she had been having an affair for _years,_ and her family are straight up acting like she did nothing wrong. Their daughter is devastated and they’re trying to like, introduce her to her mom’s “new” boyfriend and there is just nothing more infuriating. They’re acting like she’s fragile and needs support when BITCH YOU CAUSED ALL OF THIS
My thoughts exactly. How long til he's impregnated his new wife and grown bored with her too? The "I know my son and he's too immature" says a lot.
Oh, I guarantee that 2nd marriage will be even shorter than the first. I just hope he doesn't knock her up too.
Also, when you marry someone you are bringing them into your family. So to expect your family to just drop them like you did is unrealistic.
Bro gonna have at least 5 marriages by 35 😂
Rachel saying that the dad should put up with his toxic son, who went against his advice, married and cheated on the mother of his kids, left her without any money or a place to live without any family supports nearby, immediately got married to the woman he cheated with and abandoned his kids- yet the father of the 23 year old should kick out his daughter because “she works full time and should have left years ago”. 💀
The hypocrisy. The whiplash.
You could tell Shayne was embarrassed.
You don't understand, it's different. The 23-year-old is a woman so obviously she should suffer and the toxic son is a man so he shouldn't have any consequences for his actions /sarcasm
Shayne literally agreed with them there, he also reacted absurdly when ify stopped reading. You all just tryna pick favorites
also they are his friends wtf like wdym embarrassed
She’s still in her indoctrinated era .
@@herseycokgericifriends can be embarrassed by things friends say.
shanes reaction to rachel's "yeah, that's so embarrassing" was the very moment these two would never come on again lmao
When was that?
@@melanysplanet500846:20
46 minutes and about 24 seconds into the video @@melanysplanet5008
@@melanysplanet5008it’s at 46:25
Didn’t even notice that he looks like wtf😂
Rachel; “she’s 23 living at home? Embarrassing!”
Also rachel: “the fact that people feel there is a timeline they must adhere to… you’re less worthy because of your age…sad”
Please show your math, because?? what?! Hello double standards?
Absolutely!!! Their response to that made me so angry. "you wont ever be a true adult if you dont move out"??? Thats such a capitalist individualist ideology, a lot of us live with family our entire lives because that is our culture not because of financial issues. Not everyone needs to leave their family to live a "full" life. So much BS, so much bigotry, so much entitlement.
Im 27 and i take care of the house. I helped my older brother 36 when he had to move back. I take care of my younger brother. I pay for the house. If my father ever needed to come back, he is welcome. Family doesnt *only* work in the "american dream" style. It works in LOTS of ways. Dude im so heated im sorry lmao
I don't think it's about a timeline. Shayn and co. just had more symphathy for the soon to be mother and the baby who will have no space. Maybe you think you can store a baby in a closet but other people don't. Would you want the baby to rent an own place or the working 23 year old. Some people have no brain.
But the other girl IS doing things and just being shot down left and right because “it’s been done in the family already” while the other daughter, from what little was written, isn’t doing much at all….
@@maryellchenfucking neither?
Lol you could tell how much Shayne did NOT agree with Rachel and Ify in the 23-year-old stepdaughter story, he is NEVER that quiet.
Right😭😂
He even looked like he was trying HARD to relate to their side, but he couldn't get there.
@@harmonyoakes6386 honestly that’s something I admire about Shayne, he will try and see multiple perspectives and he will listen to other opinions even if he doesn’t agree.
@islagurney3272 and I love how, at the end, he said those are our thoughts. You may not agree with them
i guess that's the reason why Rachel never appear on the reddit stories couch again, some of the people has hot takes like Ian, Noah and Tommy got back a few times
Ify got some really good advices and takes tho, the "don't let them see their grand child" is terrifingly savage, and i loved it
0:14 shayne: "you both are the most honest people I know. You do not hold back."
*oh the foreshadowing*
Cut to the shock and awe he had on his face during the 23 year old move out story lol
"I've dated older guys and they liked me until I had an opinion"
I mean her point probably still stands but it's still funny
she took 2 bad take pills that morning and a whole bottle of orange juice
I had to laugh at this too as soon as he said that I knew they were going make some questionable verdicts I don’t think iv ever met anyone where being described as honest was a good thing
Especially after the last episode I was recommended Shayne agreed that people who call themselves brutally honest are looking for an excuse to say wild things
And wow they went further than i expected
I get playing devils advocate I try to see both sides to every story they even start each answer sounding like they would try seeing both sides only to continue trying to justify the person in the wrong in every story
And so passionately it often sounded like they were defending something they have experienced
For shayne to even stay quiet when he couldn’t get his opinion across and say out loud he knows how everyone is going to react is very telling
In the case of the girl: honest doesn't mean right 🤣
In the case of the guy, I was sort of agreeing in some stuff with him, but the story of the 23 yo step daughter I'm not sure what was his point. He said the 23 woman acted like a child, but the 33 woman did too
Old comment, but also it makes perfect sense that she would wait to have the conversation with her actual parent and not the step mom who's her peer and probably got with her father when she was already an adult. The step mom shouldn't be part of this conversation. And frankly a baby doesn't need a room until they're a bit older.
27 year old here living with my narcissistic family in the economic fuckery, if I could move out, I would. No one should have to live in a basement with rats and it’s sad that she would be ok with someone else going through that :/
27 y/o also reporting. same! next year when i go to grad school, i can move, but until then, i'm here trying to save as much as i can!
as a 27 year old that had a mouse in my first new space at 22 pls dont feel bad at ALL it wasn't worth it, i struggled a lot, i just got a nice apartment to live in mouse free this year
it's super tough living with family! wishing you a better situation in the coming future ❤
As someone who is binging these Reddit episodes, this is the most upsetting episode with the worst takes. As a 27 Nigerian myself, who lives with their parents, I’m really side eyeing Ify for that move out story but Rachel was hard to listen to the entire episode. Misplaced empathy, hypocrisy and just all around misjudgments. As always Shayne was a joy to watch but I will not be revisiting this one when I do comfort listens.
At least we have the Macdoesit episodes for prime television
Yeah I just made it to this one for the second time after seeing every other episode atleast 5-7 times each. She’s very annoying. The only other one that’s a bit questionable is where the stepdad had a murder house and the daughter was told about it by a neighbor and wants to move. The guest on the show kept saying that the dad didn’t treat the stepdaughter like a daughter when everything he described was very selfless and fatherly. His take annoyed me
You could just listen to only the first two stories in this video. Rachael's bad takes don't appear until the third story.
Hey! Im also a 27 year old Nigerian living at home with his parents (i had moved out at one point but moved back to save money when i was unemployed and haven't had the cance to move out again)
@@Deadlyvoltage3oh yeah that was one of the try guys and that episode was insufferable
I really like what you said about "Misplaced Empathy" because that's truly what it was in that story like I get what she was saying for a lot of it but this guy was so clearly an asshat that she almost came off as supportive and it wasn't a good look
It's hilarious how Shayne ended the video with "I'm sure you dissagree with us" Man knows how all this looked
Fr beause when it would pan to all 3 of them Shane was pulling a less than satisfied face to mention the fact that he's much less talkative in this episode any reasonable points he would make about the lack of information on some stuff was shut down which he responded by being queit if he was speaking with ANYONE ELSE he would have definitely expanded on what he wanted to say but he clearly didn't agree with most of what those two were saying at all
i feel so uncomfortable in this episode, i really don't like them
I audibly yelled shut the fuck up every time rachel tried defending the son in the wedding story. I have no respect for people who “feel bad” for abusers and deadbeats, especially not when two children are involved. Get over the “but he’s family” mentality already
🙏
Same! I don’t like Rachel. She’s an abusive enabler because she doesn’t want to see the worst in someone, even if what they do is actually evil. She doesn’t seem to grasp the concept that there are actual people in the world who are devoid of empathy and truly don’t care about anyone even tho they aren’t also mass murderers. She is sheltered and ignorant and comes across as someone who doesn’t want to face the truth.
She wasn’t defending the son at all, I disagree with her but you’re misrepresenting her
@@nataliedickens1289 she wasn’t defending the son nor was she enabling abuse
Duuuude, Yes!!! So happy that Nwadiwe responded every single time. Her way of thinking is very harmful.
A lot of people live with their parents in their 20’s and it’s nothing to be shameful or embarrassed about
It is if it's a 2 bedroom house with a new baby on the way. How does she think that is going to work?
@@FortheBudgies
That’s something the parents should have thought about before having a baby.
@@FortheBudgiesthe dad and his 33 year old girlfriend should’ve thought of that before the girlfriend told his daughter to move out
I hear Rachel speak, and I hear a ton of repressed trauma. Let's not glorify bum fathers doing bum sh*t. Good on those grand parents.
That’s exactly what I thought…she’s projecting her own issues and justifying behaviour
this. and the other story about the step daughter not moving out. like, let's not bash those who are trying to prevent themselves from living in a basement with rats in their bed.
@@jomo00 Right. Like rent is 1k where I live. I can't afford that.
@@StonerOfGotham not to mention the prices of food, gas (in some areas), and just about every other resource that one would need in order to live independently
@@jomo00 yes exactly. I was a bit shocked they had such a strong take. Shayne was more empathic and not just screaming “but if I lived with rats she can too!!”😂😂 like bro what
Got all the validation I needed reading these comments lol. Mad respect for Shayne in this video.
stan respectful shayne ♥️
That's exactly why I came to the comments section. I was wondering if I was the only person who disagreed with the hosts' views on when someone should move out of their parents' place.
I have NEVER seen Shayne SO quiet and uncomfortable as he was with the 23 year old moving out story, but I was right there with him, it was pure bullshit what Ify and Rachel was saying, especially Rachel!
Holy shit, I have never been so aggravated at a person like I was with her…
You know that something is bad if Shayne of all people is mad/uncomfortable
Shayne ended up giving his personal view in another episode and during a Lego building livestream when he wasn't steamrolled by other people
@@joevictor53which one was it?
@@joevictor53what did he say?
@@jeremywaygay it's called "Cozy Lego Building Stream" and he talks about it at 41:10
Shayne’s reaction at 46:27 is absolute gold. It tells you everything you need to know about this episode.
46:28 you are so right. The very brief look to the camera seemed like he wanted help 😂
IM IN TEARS
also I could be completely wrong, but I think this might be the first if not the only time someone other than Shayne got to hold the tablet to blaze through the comments themselves?
like I think at most I remember Shayne holding out the tablet for guests to read but not completely handing it over.
Legit shocked at Rachel's bad takes in this video. Just beacuse someone is family doesn't mean you should overlook them being toxic. Her rant about moving out also really comes off as "well I struggled and went through rough times so everyone should too".
She already has enough problems, do you see how she looks?
@@aslychair3096no need to bring her looks into it.
@@Ellen-wi6fzshe brought LITERAL victims down and was very ageist. she is as ugly as her bad takes
That’s exactly what I got from it too. Just because you were so ready to move out and were willing to live in squalor, doesn’t mean everyone else is.
girl…😭 how did she defend leaving a door unlocked with children but somehow called the dad an asshole for choosing a woman in need over his toxic son? what? 💀
yeah, I'm pretty sure age 5 is illegal to leave a kid alone most states... Not that kidnapping ALSO isn't, but BOTH those people need a police visit
@@aff77141facts!!! It’s wild to me how they were defending the mother in the story. Even if something bad was done to her, that doesn’t negate that she’s doing something bad herself
Well I think that it IS dangerous to leave your young kids in an unlocked house for moments of time, I think they’re ere more so defending the fact that the op of that story was wayy more in the wrong in this situation. The op is actually smart and I agree with them, but kidnapping anyone’s kids is just NOT IT, good friend, stupid action
@@aff77141it’s different if it’s a super safe suburb and the store is right down the street.
That’s not what happened
It bothers me so much in the daughter in law story where everyone missed the part where the son took his wife out of her home state, isolated her, and made her a stay at home mother. Its a textbook form of abuse and thats why the father and sister stayed with her. She was all alone and it sounds like her only "friends" was his family. She had no support. They talked about her not being able to afford a place...that's the point, that's the manipulation and abuse. It's so weird how they completely missed that point and thought dad and sister were just doing it for her sanity/the safety of the kids? Yeesh
yeah. i definitely won't be attending some stupid wedding my asshole son is throwing and abandon his manipulated wife alone. if the son is capable of cheating and doing shitty things to their partner, i'm sure he'll be okay lol
Also, the fact that she is PART OF THEIR FAMILY. she has been part of their family for YEARS. The dad and sister are spending time with someone who was brought into their family and taking care of them after their brother has clearly been awful. People don’t have to dump your ex (who hasn’t done anything wrong) just because you do.
Yup. They really missed the point. Ify had a better take, but he still focused on the grandkids (which is fine, they also need support) but the abandoned wife was clearly abused by the son, and the father and sister didn't agree with that. I'm glad they realised that and supported the wife. She really needs it, being left all alone with two kids.
Ify did bring that up though?
Thank you for saying this. I was waiting for them to mention it but their reasonings never came close to it.
Ah yes, the single and only episode of reddit stories with takes so bad that even Shayne is physically uncomfortable
This one was a tough watch, I've never seen such bad takes on this show before and Shayne clearly hadn't either
It’s always strange seeing how quiet he is cuz normally he’s always going back and forth with the other people on the show
You can tell that Shayne was mortified by some of their responses
Their responses were so bad it made fun watching 😂
He was like "oh god okay we'll have to come up with excuses if they ever want to come back on the show" I love shayne
Lookit the upvote to downvote ratio on this episode (there's a Chrome add-on that makes it so you can see dislikes again, I highly recommend it). Most of the other videos are like, thousands and thousands of upvotes, usually under ONE thousand down.
....this one has *7.5K* downvotes (and I'm one of them). The audience did NOT like them.
@@robinchesterfield42damn 😂 well deserved, I forgot abt the add-on to see dislikes being a thing for a bit. They definitely saw that lol
@gappy6964 so how much is it loll
The jump from “when I was 23 i needed the experience of barely affording rent and living in a rat cave” to “I’m 31 and there should be no timeline to big life moments”. Girl the cognitive dissonance
The absolute WHIPLASH I got from the "you're 23 you need to move out and stop being a burden on your parents" to "There is no timeline for big life milestones! You aren't worthless for waiting!! you're a victim of a societal systemic issue!!!" is fucking WILD.
on a lighter note, I, too, was recently diagnosed with as Anemic and let me tell you! It has not changed my life at all except that now I take meds and can, in fact, do MORE things then I could before :)
haha i feel that, im only slightly anemic but like the most life impacting thing so far has been how it's affected my digestion ig haha
im not anemic but iron deficient (dangerously close to anemic in my doctors words) and lemme say ive never felt more awake in my life with those supplements man
the 'limited [erspective' and 'sad' sent me
Honestly they're not considering the place where they are living, here in Italy for example it's really hard to move out because of the living cost. Anyway it might be because of certain mental health issues that she needs extrasupport and we don't know enough context for it.
@@martinatinacastellanocaste9877 it’s hard to move out at 23 literally ANYWHERE 😬
love how shayne kept his diplomacy all the way to the end and ended with "i'm sure you will disagree with some of these takes..." like bruh he knows these two were acting awful
The way everyone fell apart laughing at “anemia”. Never in a million years would I have guessed the story was going there.
I almost drowned when they said anemia, I had a mouthful of tea!😂
Rachel’s laugh at 11:26 had me pissing my pants laughing
I literally rewound the video thrice just to make sure I wasn't hearing it wrong too
Yeah literally anemia is not a big deal it just means that you need to eat things that have high iron so you have more iron in your blood so you don't get dizzy.
I mean yes and no. It depends on the cause of the anemia. For instance, some people with liver and GI issues cannot process iron and it's a symptom of a much larger problem. My partner has that for instance, she doesn't just get dizzy. She turns white as a sheet and passes out before potentially vomiting and not being able to hold down food for days just from the sheer nausea and dizziness that comes from the iron lows. Don't misunderstand. I think this guy is a complete twit and honestly I think Ify has the right idea that he's looking for something to drop a bomb and hide behind.
Dude, shaynes SILENCE when Rachel and ify were going ham on the 23 yr old is INSANE
his silence is the best part of this entire episode. those two guests need a reality check lmao
For the most part i listen to these like a podcast but man whenever i looked after they were going off for a while, I had never seen Shayne like that and man I agree.
I had to stop watching, I was getting too angry at that part
@@mirita2646 fr, i paused and came to the comments, it was a validating to know that pretty much everyone was feeling the same way about some of their takes
I do feel kinda bad for them tho, regardless of the earned criticism, recieving massive negative feedback must be scarring
Crazy how rachel expects everyone to accept the cheating lying son back into the family but is grossed out by a 23 year old not being able to move out lol
Yeah…that kind of bugged me, too…
I understand nuance, so it doesn't bother me. Why don't you put your own vulnerable opinions out there, Courtney.
@@hundredhanded1205 this comment is literally courtney's opinion, I and many ppl agree, it's not character assasination, it's just we think she had a bad take, which is valid.
@@krisl6537 no way. How are you all so sweet and reasonable? Why did I sleep on this community for so long?
I was ready to fight for my fucking life. Holy shit.
46:25
"That's so embarassing"
*shayne visibly going wtf?*
Rough episode
I didn't notice that but you 100% right. Thanks for the timestamp!
I went back to this and it made me feel so seen 😭
omg i just said the same
His face literally went 😐🤨
i've never seen shayne make that face HELP
"They need to grow up thinking that their dad loves them."
I knew a kid throughout elementary and middle school who lived with his grandparents and only saw his parents a few times a year. He was told they were just too busy working all around the world earning money to support him. As he got older, his behavior in school got worse and worse. he would goof off, disobey teachers, and even hurt himself in the middle of class. We went to separate high schools and I never saw him again.
Several years later, he posted his story to Facebook. He'd always had suspicions about his parents that only grew as time went on. Eventually he made his grandparents tell him the truth. His parents weren't traveling for work. They had never married and after he was born, they broke up. Neither one of them wanted him, so they left him with his maternal grandparents. Out of misguided love, his grandparents demanded that his parents at least pretend to love him and concocted this stupid story to explain why they weren't there 99% of the year. By the time he was 12, his parents had both moved on to start families with other people and had barely bothered to continue with this farce.
Having his suspicions confirmed destroyed him. He turned to harder and harder drugs to escape from reality. He risked his life for cheap thrills. He just didn't care anymore whether he lived or died. Eventually, he was able to get help and start the process of recovery, but it's a long f*cking road when both your mind and body are absolutely wrecked.
That's what growing up thinking your parents love you looks like when they don't actually love you. Don't ever do that to a kid.
Edit: Oh wow I didn't realize this comment got so much attention. To clarify, the quote from the video reminded me of this situation and I posted it as a response to the idea that children HAVE to know an absent parent loves them. Because there's this societal norm that insists a child needs the love of two parents, and if you take that to heart you're definitely going to mess up your kid.
Jesus christ. That poor dude.
well said my man
Seriously. Just don't hide important things from kids, they're so much more resilient than people give them credit for and growing up with those hard lessons and a genuine loving hand to help through it will make them a healthy adult, rather than putting them in a snowglobe, isolated from the truth, bound to break when the truth hammer comes down
@@aff77141 I grew up without a father, I would see him once or twice a year until I was 7 and then he just vanished. Nobody ever talked to me about him and love at the same time and it always felt weird being with him, I knew he didn't love me or care about me that much, so when he disappeared it wasn't that bad. I remembered the first time he missed my birthday, I waited for him, and then christmas too, but after that it was pretty easy to let go. I knew he didn't love me and I've always known it's not my fault, it would've been more difficult growing up thinking he stopped loving me because of something I might have done, or finding out he never did. My family gave me all the tools I needed to understand the situation and I thank them for their honesty. People definitely don't give kids the credit that they deserve.
EXACTLY. If they think he loves them, they’ll only be hurt more when he continually disappoints them.
“we can’t put a timeline on milestones” “if you still live with your parents at 23 you’re not growing up”
Note how Rachel was all, “I had to live with rats,” and “I know marriage isn’t in the cards for me,” aka a mix of rules for thee and not for me + I can only sympathize with my own experiences. Selfish smh.
smh..
I had to live with my mom until I was 25 because of how expensive London is soooo I disagree
Old story, and I feel like the comments have dissected this to death a lil bit, but the jump from “you’re 23, that’s an age you HAVE TO BE MOVED OUT BY and you’re disgusting and a burden for not doing that” to “Im 31 and I refuse to adhere by society’s expectations of my timeline for my life” would have been HILARIOUS if it wasn’t horribly privileged, Western-centric and just incredibly tone deaf
Also, i would LOVE LOVE LOVE for Ify to stop assuming that his immigrant family experience is THE immigrant family experience! 😊 bad takes all around, 0/10!
Wouldn’t it be privileged to be able to live with your parents for a long time and not be forced to move out and struggle.
@@halatiny6537it’s normal for asians
I don't think it is Western-Centric as in my country (Western), pretty common to still be living with your parents until you are 25-30 years old, especially with the prices of basic necessities and rent or a mortgage increasing exponentially.
Yeah it was disheartening. I was dealing with manic depressive episodes, severe anxiety and PTSD at 23. If I had moved out then I would not be alive right now. I was barely holding on when I had the support of my family directly behind me and around me. I cannot imagine the hell I would have been in dealing with the burdens I deal with now that I live alone. I would be dead or homeless in less than six months.
Iffy saying “i get shits hard right now but you gotta find a way” while he’s wearing a gold watch, a gold chain, and a gold ring, baffles me. You can tell both of the guests were sooooo entitled and had hand outs their whole lives and had it easy. They just assume everyone should be where they are in life and that’s hella sad. I mean Shayne’s cold slient stare screams volumes.
I wish I could pin a comment lol the levels of privilege on display here is insane
Ether entitlement or that boomer mentality of younger people need it as bad as I did at that age or worse
I don't know his story but even if he earned all his money he doesn't know that girl's live and her whole environment. I do not think her parents were crazy for asking her to move out and maybe the daughter didn't run the numbers once she could split a roomate. But going into on the route of "go live" as if money or better job offers will just appear because their parents need the space is crazy and gotta love how they just assume the daughter is pilling on the dollars and not helping in the house with anything even though not even OP mentioned that to make her case look better (which if she really was thinking she wasn't the asshole here I think it's a pretty good point to bring up)
I've seen Iffy in other channels and he always misses the mark.
The look he was giving them for that split second at 49:07 was so cold to me. Lol
shayne selling himself once more as one of the most based ppl at smosh lol. his look of quiet discomfort was everything
idk i really dislike some of rachel's takes, even at damien's funeral roast her jokes bashing him for pursuing an autism diagnosis were just... and i know the jokes were cleared w damien but as another autistic person i couldn't get behind it.
He's the best. Hilarious but seems mature n level headed.
@@tsukikiki23she honestly seems like the person who has to be the sob story. No one can have a harder life than her and everyone must feel bad for her.
It's wild how to my knowledge, this was Rachael's last on camera appearance. 💀
@@ryandaso9883thiiis exactly! known way too many people like this in my life so far and she fits that narrative exactly
I genuinely feel bad for Shayne here, especially during the 23 year old living with her parents still, because he tried so hard to get a word in edge-wise and kept getting talked over and I watched him struggle so hard with his non-confrontational personality while he had to sit there and listen to the two of them monologuing and basically trashing this poor girl. And for him to try and say "Hey we don't have a ton of information here so there could be reasons why" only to be met with "well when I first moved out yada yada yada" and being further talked over until they literally ran out of the same statements to repeat, Shayne is someone who is incredibly empathetic towards the people in a lot of stories they end up reading but this really emphasized just how much he tries to empathize with people.
Also yeah no, to absolute GO IN on this poor 23 year old for not moving out of her parents house because she "needs to grow up" and then IMMEDIATELY go into the "there's no timeline for life and nobody's going to tell me when to do what" about the marriage vs. new child, like girl WHAT? Did you not JUST monologue for like 15-20 minutes over you trying to dictate another person not meeting a "timeline point"?!
as someone who is 23 and struggling to find employment, living in a black mold infested apartment, this episode was fucking awful. i would not be alive without the support of my dad because i would starve to death. i spend every second i'm not applying to jobs taking surveys for like $2 an hour. genuinely fuck everyone other than shayne in this episode i used to love ify but this made me really reconsider everything about him. absolutely will be avoiding that woman like the plague now too she's absolutely vile.
@edaaaah I'm 20 and I'm unemployed and finding it hard to find a job but even my parents would never pressure me as there is no right time to move out, you do it when your ready
I’m 24 and live at home still. It’s expensive out there and it’s much easier to simply split expenses with my parents than try to figure out a whole new thing with money I don’t have lol
Dude it's so crazy, I was literally doing projects and was playing this episode in the background
around the "23 year old being forced to move out" story is when I was questioning why couldn't hear shayne speak- he's usually so talkative- I had to read the comments section TT__TT
I'm not even going to mention my age but I still live with my dad but I sure as fuck help out with bills and chores frequently!
“Yeah I lived amongst rats and you should too. That’s part of being an adult”. Honey no.
The fact that she though that was a flex 😭😭😭 like who wants that?? I wouldn’t wanna have to “make it work” if it means sacrificing my well being for no reason. Like. What are we winning here? Independence with the side of the plague??
When she brought up the rats, I was shocked. Does she honestly think that the 23 year old should move out, most likely to a rat infested shithole, just because she herself struggled? Rachel just had the worst takes this episode.
They both ruined their image I had with that. Like wow?! Maturity level 0
Very boomer mentality. I suffered so you have to as well.
Not the best take.
@@Han_jinheeit’s giving “I had to pay student loans so you should too 😡”
I felt so offput by this episode. Coming back and reading the comments made me feel so much better lol
It's a bit of a guilty pleasure for me to come back and read through them again to re-validate my feelings on this video lmao
Rachel describing her living conditions when she first moved out like girl… im sorry you lived with rats but that doesn’t mean other people should have to???
Right shes so confident that everything she says is correct. But ok just because your life and experience went a certain way doesn’t mean it will apply to everyone
She moves out fast cause she was forced to by the bad environment
fr like quit playing opression olympics and set a peanut butter trap or something
LITERALLY. I'm over here like "girl we do NOT want this tf???"
Exactly. I'd expect that from someone a couple generations older. That mentality of "well, I had it bad so you should have to too." I thought the whole point was to try to make life better for your children. Also, I'm really hoping Ify's kid doesn't have any life problems that keeps them at home past his "expected timeline." It's just ridiculous. I remember being 23 and I had a debilitating medical condition at the time that made it to where I couldn't work and was house-bound. After several surgeries, I'm back on track with where I want to be in life now but dang, if I'd heard this back then, I would've felt hopeless. Thank God I had loving, empathetic parents who helped me through it both emotionally and financially.
no way she defended the deadbeat but called the stepdaughter a burden
It's... Yikes lmao
I know. it screams projected family trauma to me.
Which one was the deadbeat ?
@@zoeinkerman969the one who married his affair partner.
Enablers are the biggest problem in toxic family dynamics.
rachel talking about how there “shouldnt be a timeline” during the story about the daughter and cousins, but also mocking a 23 year old for still living at home rly grinds my gears
no same.
It’s “there’s no timeline for life events” until you’re poor…
she grinded my gears through this whole video, genuienly some of the most dog water shitty out of touch takes ive heard in a while
This is the first time I've seen this video. She's really unlikable. She should look over this video again and realize how she comes off.
Yeah, agreed... the grindset-mindset *reeked* in the 23yr old discussion. Why *would* you move out young (a really weird traditional expectation which is just crazy in this economy) to a worse off situation when you aren't being forced to? And yet, when it's about marriage and kids, also traditional expectations, folks have all the time in the world?
As a mother i can say that leaving your child home alone who is very young is not only irresponsible but also shows a lot of neglect.
When you have friends telling you they will go to the store for you and you still choose to go yourself leaving your child alone that shows how much more she cared about going out then just staying home being a mom.
"Like a child, she waited for when her dad to be alone."
Oh, I'm sorry. You mean she waited to talk with her ACTUAL PARENT THAT SHE GREW UP WITH?!?!
Read as "If they're not blood or didn't raise me, I don't have to listen to her or even try a dialogue with them..."
Me: *starts counting fingers* teachers, siblings, people known as experts in their field, employers, anyone I've asked for advice on because I know I'm inexperienced in...
@@castleoffiction96 It read as an evil stepmom who the daughter was afraid of (For good reason she was confronted by The stepmom who completely disregarded her decision And harassed her into her room.
Eh, 6 of 1
51:55 for anyone wondering.
Ify normally has great family takes but what the fuck was he smoking on this one.
I couldn't imagine my theoretical Step-Mom, who would be a handful of years older than me asking to step in on me and my Father's private conversation. One raised me and ones trying to replace me. Wtf.
I would also wait for the lady who wants to kick me out to leave so i can talk to my actual father/parent about it... what the fuck.
Right! I can imagine the daughter feeling “kicked out”/“replaced” considering it’s because of the new baby.. I feel so sorry for her! 😢
And yes, the world IS crazy expensive. So that’s a fair point on its own either way.
Anyway, she brought it up with someone she was comfortable with. And it’s not Step Moms right to argue with that.
As someone who’s watched everything in this series and been uncomfy with some tales this one was just… insufferably hard to watch. The takes in this were so bad and judgemental and hypocritical that they made me feel like shit as a victim of a very clear abusive relationship like the DIL story. Rachel really makes herself sound ignorant when she changes her opinions based off on what she wants to say to sound smart. How can you say “there’s no timeline for major lifetime events” then imply all young adults who can’t afford to move out our losers and burdens?
Also, you three are all privileged and live in La and have money so trying to talk down to people making minimum wage who literally can’t afford anything is not the hot take you think it is.
I was so excited to watch this, and I rarely if ever comment on videos, but I could not agree more! I was honestly DISGUSTED by some of the reactions in this. Like is this smosh or did I somehow accidentally watch a Joe Rogan taping.
She inadvertedly called a lot of people around the world losers and burdens. I mean, look at some countries where adults and their kids still live with their parents (I believe some places in India have that custom). I lived with my grandpa until I was like 22-23, the housing market was crap, I had too little income even if I found a space, I did help with rent/water/electricity even though he hadn't asked me to help, he didn't want me to help.
That made me so disguisted. "Moving out" doesn't have s*it to do with "becoming an adult human".
My sister has had 2 kids, and for the first couple of months, they slept in their parents room in their crib. So like, it's not like "Oh baby is coming in 6 months, we need to prepare space", you have time. My niece had her daughter when she lived in a 1-room small little place. They made it work just fine, a baby doesn't take much space (living wise, attention wise they take a lot of space).
I get the vibe that after filming this Shayne *immediately* went to go find Damien lol
no fr😭
i literally said to my partner "this wouldn't have happened if damien was there" lmao
“Dude I just filmed the craziest episode of Reddit Stories. These comments are going to be absurd”
Also kind of ironic that they weren’t invited back on the show but Damien has… shows who has the better sides on things
@@itsmeyahgirlthey are also on different platforms/companies now.
That ‘burden’ comment during the 23 yr old story? Fucking hell..
"Girl you're 23" is so USA-centric it's insane to me. You don't know her financial situation, her psychological situation, you don't know nothing. A burden to her parents? His dad talked to her and agreed the best thing to do was to keep her in the house. Y'all spent a lot of time defending a bunch of 30 years olds in other stories 'cause other people wanted them to "grow up and act like adults" by saying that there is not a single way to be an adult and then say stuff like these?
also it's insane that they assumed she wasn't helping out at all? She could be paying rent, or maybe she does a lot of work around the house. Two months rent is nice, but not enough to live on for an extended period of time if her job doesn't pay enough, she still has to pay for groceries and gas too, that's also not counting any potential spend money so she's not just going to work and being at home all the time. Also don't know why they assumed she wasn't in school at all
@@colleen_marieexactlyyy 💀 also her saying something along the way "I struggle so you should too," abt moving out is so 😬 ... I just can tell she has a comfy and wide economic safety net from her parents/family.
So this is USA thing? I thought this is a western thing. In Asia, we didn't really move out unless you get a job in another state or get married.
@@colby_247in Latin America and Europe people don't move just because they're adults either. There's usually another reason, but it's not like "well, I'm 20 I have to leave the house"
For reallll, I live in Australia and at 23 its completely normal to live with family because most people stay at home through university. Like who can afford to move out while you're studying 😭
i’m 23 and just had to move back home. my dad wasn’t happy about it bc im an adult. then he saw how completely defeated and broken living in an expensive home with two roommates who were absolutely awful. everyone’s timelines are different and i wasn’t ready to move out. not everyone can “be a human adult,” which is a dick thing to say. idk. i’m unhappy with that take.
Agreed, you arent less of an adult for not moving out right away.
Is you dad still giving you grief about being back home or is he supportive? It's absolutely insane these days.
The human adult comment was really out of line. People have lots of issues and using that as a rubric for what is normal and acceptable is really immature.
From the moment she reworded Shayne saying “that’s a really nice way to say you’re a bitch Rachel” I was not expecting her takes to be good. As someone that lives in a place where multi-generational homes is a thing, I can’t imagine not living with my parents. Housing is expensive and pay rates are a bare minimum. She’s so out of touch. I’d rather be living here with my parents and sharing bills, than doing everything by myself living in a shithole apartment that costs $1650.
this!!!!!
9:10 the thing that they’re all missing is the part about her being in a custody battle. The majority of kidnappings are by the other parent, family member or (coincidentally) close family friends. The OP was wrong but the fear of kidnapping originated from the fact that her friend is currently in a custody battle and if her ex tried to kidnap the kids it could be done easily.
100% agreeing with Ify on the Skipped the son’s wedding situation! Just because someone is family doesn’t mean you have to support their decisions
“Kids should grow up thinking that their father loves them!”
Should they? I grew up thinking that even though his behavior suggested otherwise, and it scarred and traumatized me to some points I’m still realizing
I thought the same thing. What if it distorts their perception of love for the rest of their lives? :(
My thoughts exactly, people would rather risk traumatizing their children than to have an uncomfortable conversation.
@@indys9005 this was exactly what I was thinking. Should they believe he still loves them and is there for them even tho he’s an absent parent and doesn’t give a shit? This is a HUGE L on Rachel
Same with my mom. Realizing that relationship was damaging to me and cutting her out of my life was when I finally starting growing into myself. The way they responded to that story...
Same and I literally cannot stand people expressing affection for me ever because it feels like a lie 🤷♀️
honestly i wish rachel never would have done this episode because i see her so much differently now… i cannot stand people who are so loyal to family that they excuse their behavior/enable
Same
Yeah, I'm never going [and this is my first time seeing her on Smosh btw] I'm never going to see her as anything better than this. It isn't a matter of differing opinions, it's a matter of I can not respect this person at all now. There's no chance to even gain respect, because this initial impression has completely broken that chance. Enabling and justifying the son here is just a huge yikes. Part of me feels sorry for her, cause there's a deep layer of repressed trauma that she seems to be a victim of there, but I just can not get around the fact that she is making these arguments.
Straight up never going to watch a video with her in it again
It especially gives me whiplash when she then goes on to approve of kicking out the 23 year old daughter who clearly stated their financial issues and didn't even consider how they probably feel like they're getting replaced rn 🙃
Yep
Ive actually had really awful anemia, resulting in an emergency blood transfusion last year. It's impacted my life way more than folks here have said it does. It's not just cold fingers and needing to eat liver, for me its been heart palpitations and infusions. Still would never expect someone to change their plans like that for me, the fuck. It's clearly an excuse
Agreed. I was a little displeased with the flippant “cold fingers” comment, but seeing how the rest of the video was that was not the worse offense. Anemia can 100% affect your quality of life. But I’m this story it doesn’t sound like that is the case.
Every single one of Rachel's takes was ass, I'm sorry you had to hear that
This girl is so far out there its crazy. How she keeps defending the deadbeat dad who cheated on his wife with his next wife is just mind boggling. My gawd.
Yeah...Rachel is by the far the worst person on Smosh. Jfc her takes are wild and dangerous.
if these were filmed in front of a live audience, you best believe I would have brought the tomatoes. Get that bitch out of here
Exactly. No one is demonizing him. And no one should pretend he's the best dad ever right now, either.
@@creasdaddythank god she left
She was reaching!! “But I don’t think anyone should be talking bad about the dad to the kids.” No one said that anyone was or would be doing that.
The cognitive dissonance is astounding. To say 23 means you’re too old to live with your parents and then to immediately pivot: I’m in my thirties, I don’t plan to get married anytime soon there’s no need to place an age on a milestone. Like pick one, you’re either too old to have not met a “standard” cultural milestone in time and therefore pathetic or you’re not.
I’m so glad someone pointed this out I was about to comment the same thing. The double standard from Rachel & Iffy is astounding
Honestly like how disconnected from reality are they? I don't know their circumstances but like don't they live in LA? I always thought it was expensive as hell there. I live in Sydney and to buy a one bedroom apartment you basically have to sell your soul, not to mention food prices have gone up too. I'm only 18, studying in Uni, and my degree takes 4 years. So by their logic in the one year after getting my degree I should have a high enough paying job to move out fully and buy my own place and support myself... like I'm so happy for you if that's possible but where for me the only way that's possible is if I just settle for a not great place and scrimp on everything. If your parents can afford to support you a little longer, why not save up money so you can actually set yourself up for a successful future instead of settling for wasting your money and putting yourself in debt. You're just creating a mountain to climb later on and all you get out of it is faux societal validation... Just goes to show how important it is to value the idea of perspective. People come from different places in life... I really don't see the point it judging them for that.
@@notaspeck6104I think I should add some context for how crazy living in California is, not just LA. California in general, most apartments are like $1800-$2000+ a month (la is probably significantly higher), to rent you need double the income of rent, you need a good credit score, on top of that, there's added expense with utilities, on top of food, transportation, etc. So like most of the people I know either live with 2+ roommates or live with their parents. It's completely normal to live with your parents at 23 and this mentality coming from people who live in LA is insane to me. Like you know how expensive life can be, so judging someone for them living with their parents is so upsetting.
Exactly what I was thinking! I’m glad someone wrote it out!!
@@queenautumnween2796I would honestly be so happy to find a one bedroom under 2500 😢
i know that rachel had the worst takes and ify had one bad take, but rachel and ify going back and forth on the skipping son’s wedding story really wowed me. every part of rachel’s take on that story made me so angry, and ify giving his side of it instead of her just spewing made me happy
Same, i thought i was taking crazy pill for a hot sec. IMO it was pretty plain to see for everyone why he did what he did and it was very much understandable.
After her third rant in excess of a minute I was like ight she doesn't exist anywhere near this family so it'd be nice if she stopped talking because Gramps already did the right thing.
I can at least say this: Rachel is good at discussion. Not once did she cut off Ify or cop any sort of tude or fire back in a manner that wasn’t passive. Even though her takes were very iffy and easily disagreeable, we can at least admit she is good at seeing other sides. Personally, I feel like someone who is open to other opinions/actually listens to other opinions despite a bad take is overall better than someone who always has decent takes but can never listen to opinion. Ify had some damn good takes though and that’s for certain
@@AdolisYT no yeah that’s totally fine and a great trait to have, but consistency is also a good trait too which she lacks
So... you want people to just think what you think or what?
At 49:08 Shayne's face and clenching fist says so much, I'm so glad he was there!
Oh my god I didn’t even notice. But this is the first time I’ve seen him look like that
I respect the hell out of Shane as a host for letting his guests give their batshit takes even when he clearly doesn't agree because I could NEVER.
Yes!!!
Yeah girl was tripping about enabling the father that abandoned his wife and kids.
we stan a respectful shayne 🤭
I was thinking it's rediculous they left their kids. Your a mother, take ur kids with u. My parents had 8 kids at home, but the oldest was like 16. But these kids are so young
He almost agreed with everything they said 😭 Even if he wasnt agreeing in inside, he didnt even try to argue or tell his point
Listening to Rachel continuing her take on the dad not going to his wedding is killing me!!!! I'm glad to hear Ify prioritise the kids' wellbeing and Shayne giving good neutral takes!
Yes! Thank you!
Plus, it's just basic human decency. The dad's son is a piece of shit, sure, granted. But the mother is still a human being, and had to be feeling extremely abandoned and scared for their future, even with the parents getting her and her kids an apartment. Sure, the dad should always normally go to their child's wedding whenever possible, but in this case the son didn't deserve his father there. I just hope the son's new wife finds out sooner rather than later what kind of guy she married, because she's very likely in for the same sort of situation that his ex-wife is now in.
Yes I was like why is this ENABLER speaking so freely with a 🔥 🗑 🔥 opinions 🤔 those kids he will likely abandon are family too 🤦🏾♀️
Thank you, like I was shocked a lot of her takes we’re upsetting and she was kind of sassy especially with iffy for some reason.
@@chanson8508 I think she also failed to see that the man is clearly abandoning his previous wife as if she’s trash, like all the responsibilities he is supposed to carry is just dumped on the poor woman. Plus there were also hints that he is clearly a very very selfish man, with him saying he only wants things on HIS terms and rather than speaking and talking it out with his family.
Also with the point about demonising the father, i think it’s worse to give hope to the children and then them finding out the truth about their father. I would rather grow up with the truth than to live in a lie. But maybe that’s my take on it.
“Like a child waited until she got her dad alone” are you insane? We’re shaming her and calling her a child now because she wanted to talk to her parent and explain her feelings in private?????? These guests are awful and lack all empathy
Yeah that took me out, it's the parent she trusts the most for obvious reasons and her dad would obviously be more understanding 💀
Like that’s her dad of course she just wants to talk to him not his new wife who’s only ten years older than her and trying to push her out of her home
Literally why would she even have the conversation with the woman 10 years older than her who thinks she calls the shots on her life instead of with her actual parent she started living with while stepmom was still a child? That was such a fucking weird take among a sea of weird takes. And it's just pretty messed up how his entire justification on why that was low is just that gross thing of infantilizing fathers and "oh you know we can't say no to our daughters" like the fathers aren't the one who should be the responsible parent when it comes to conversations with their daughters.
The stepmom isn’t her parent in any way, shape or form. She doesn’t get to decide anything for the stepdaughter. Also, a baby needs to sleep in the parents’ room to protect it from cot death. It takes up no space.
scrolling through these comments for emotional support watching this video and just wanted to say I love your pfp
was listening to this on spotify
got on youtube to see what the response to this was becauseShayne felt absent the whole episode and now I can see why from his facial expressions
this is a hard watch holy shit
As a 23 year old who is in grave danger of having to move back in with my parents because I can't afford school and rent working full time... this hurt
No one is saying don’t live with your parents. However u need boundaries. Especially if your parents aren’t well off. & you should also be aware that you do lose some type of independence. But as long as u both can live together comfortably, there’s no problem with living w/ parents
@eemahknee thank you for the vote of confidence, I had lived with my parent up until recently and we'd be alright. However I do think they are saying in the video I shouldn't be living with my parents and my existence is a burden to them if I have to which is just a rough take
@@siobhandrown885 I can see why you would feel this way. You would only be a burden if you are making things harder for your parents. If u don’t do house chores, if u don’t try to help w/ bills, making messes, break things.. you’re parents are giving u a place to stay so u have to help out in some way I personally feel. I hope things work out for u & don’t be discouraged by social media. Do whatever makes you both happy.
You aren't the only person in this situation. Most of my friends and I all had to move back in too. It's really tough out there for so many of us. You're doing your best and it is more than enough.
Don't listen to the stupidity in this video! Life is hard and I'm so glad you have a safety net for when things get ugly. Good for you! You'll get where you want to be
They didn't use a single clip of this episode on the year end compilation. And I find that hilarious 😂
LMAOO I LOVE THAT shayne and the editors got the message
Because they realized how truly toxic the takes they had in this episode are. Lol.
@@Knightcowboy89which ones?
@@HA-nj1qtMost of them
@@Knightcowboy89 you can tell by the look on shanes face that hes uncomfortable and probably wondering if he should just axe the episode.
The entitlement coming from these two when talking about the 23-year-old. Just ridiculous. The daughter clearly did not feel comfortable talking with the step mother and told the dad about the situation. And even after that, the step mom went on and comfort the daughter. Clearly, the step mother crossed that boundary and it seems like she attacked the daughter from the daughter's perspective even after telling no once.
I come back every so often to this one because I sometimes convince myself that it wasn't THAT bad. But, boy howdy, it WAS that bad.
I can see why neither one was invited back.
Sorry you lived in a rat infested basement Rachel, but as a 20 something I’m gonna live with my mom and do the chores she asks in the comfort of my childhood bedroom! We shouldn’t rush milestones, right? Or is that just about weddings not moving out.
I'm 20 and my sister is 22. We both live with our mum in our childhood home. We give her money for food, electricity etc. We do chores. Our house is big enough to house the 3 of us and if my sister and i wanted to start our own families there would still be enough room for everybody. Neither of us are planning on moving out any time soon and that is completely normal.
literally like as a 20 year old her response was mind blowing. like between being a student and having a job im doing my best, but to belittle a 20-something for living at home, then telling her rat-infested horror story is wild to me. i don’t know a better way to say it but like…that seems like a personal, familial thing on her end. her rat-infested horror story is the exact reason people are scared to move out, and many parents would do a lot to help out before letting their kids move into that situation. so condescending to repeatedly refer to the op as “kids,” because they’re comfortable in her family home, and aren’t under any heavy pressure to move out
@@cdrew555 and like... if she has experienced how bad it can be, why would she wish that on other people? Why does she want other young adults to have to live like that if we have the better option of living with our parents?
As someone who left home at 17 (abusive home) if you feel safe and comfortable enough to stay and save....fucking do it. There is no glory in struggle that hard
@@Vitasaurushonestly? As a 30 year old? Jealousy, it's jealousy. Irrational yes but that's what it is.
As someone who struggled after having to leave home early, Rachels whole "i struggled so should you" energy was so infuriating, dont even get me started with how she was defending that deadbeat piece of crap, my blood was boiling
I feel like she grew up around people who were victim-blamers 😓
She definitely did, that part pissed me off tooooo
I mean, she is from Texas 😅
it’s very gen x of her 😭 even tho she’s gen y lmaoo
Her take on the father not attending the son's wedding was so fucking infuriating too. That pos son CLEARLY abused that poor woman, not only cheated on her. It's literally a fact that he FORCED her to become a sahm- there is no scenario in the world where that wouldn't be an abuse situation
sorry for the fricking essay, but here goes:
for real, i was on the verge of tears. I had to move out way earlier than I was ready for because my parents suddenly decided to move far away. I tried staying with them, but it isolated me completely from my old social life and made going to uni much more difficult, so I had to move out.
My parents never considered me a burden. I probably could've lived there until I was 30.
My sister was encouraged to leave home early because she constantly wanted to do her own thing without taking us into account (like coming home at 3am during the week, waking up my parents who are light sleepers) and got very argumentative when my parents tried to set boundaries regarding that behaviour. I didn't have any of that since I was much more introverted, so my parents had no problem with me still living with them. And I didn't see a reason to move out either: uni was only 20 minutes away, and living on my own would just create a ton of extra work for me next to my studies in terms of chores that were now just divided over the family.
Being neurodivergent, having to take care of everything by myself is one of the most exhaustive things I have ever had to do. My parents moved in together right out of their parents' homes, they never had to take care of everything by themselves, they are sometimes completely oblivious to how hard this shit is for me despite being neurodivergent themselves. I still struggle with the trauma of my parents suddenly moving right after I also came back home from a traumatic exchange which left me utterly homesick. It's like I never really came home and every kind of comfort has just been ripped away from me.
I feel like Rachel and Ify are also just totally insensitive to the fact that some people (especially neurodivergent people) need more time before they're ready to move out and handle life on their own.
ffs man, I really fucking hated their takes.
For Rachel to say that it’s time for the 23 year old to move out and then in the VERY NEXT STORY say something along the lines of “there is no timeline to abide too” lmfaoo what. Heavy privilege talking, not everyone can afford to move out at the same time.
I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with my gf as my roommate essentially and we can barely afford it. I make just over 40K and she makes right around 40K I believe and we still struggle on certain months. Not even considering hobbies, groceries, travel, etc. I left my parents for my own reasons but if a father and daughter are cool living together in this economy, I applaud them !
I hope your situation will get better !
@ glad to report is has ! We’ve upgraded to a two bedroom. Currently saving for a house and adopted our sweet sweet dog Skywalker a few months ago ! But it’s a lot of hard work and communication between me and the Mrs. But that’s life !
I literally couldn't finish this episode, just seeing how they trashed someone for being 23 and living with their parent is so bizarre to me.
Rachel gives hard white knight vibes - only progressive in words, not in thought (in this case, not in words either, but judging by the other story that's what she aims for)
100%, I'm 25 and live with my parents so this was just so frustrating to watch.
@@Amy-se8vqlegit. 24 here, and still living with family, AND i’m constantly battling the thoughts of being a burden. their comments made me so incredibly angry.
I know 23 is SO YOUNG!! if I could I would have to stay with my mom until I wanted to and she would gladly take me if I ever needed to move back. Wtf
This episode only made me feel more insecure about being 21 and still living with my mom. My least favorite episode so far
Shayne was so quiet during the bad takes from the others lol, you can tell he disagrees
on top of how they wouldn't let him talk when he tried to. as if he isn't the host.
he should've said something then
I was doing something else while watching this and I started to hear the bad takes so I looked over and Shayne looked like he wanted to crawl in a hole and die. Same brother!
The way Rachel immediately laughs at the fact that this 23 year old is still living with their family 44:22 is so gross to me. She's instantly looking down on this person because they are not financially stable enough to live on their own. I don't think I could last 5 minutes being in the same room as her, I couldn't even finish this video because her opinions upset me so much
She seems to chuckle in condescension at most of the stories. "That's not how science works." You mean that's not how genetic combinations work? Quite an annoying person trying to present as sweet.
@@davidlaki why would you judge her over that sentence tho, just cuz you’ve disagreed with other things you dont gotta nitpick
Yeah this Rachel person is gross
I agree
honestly i thought she did the quick maths and read 33 year old wife and i was like damn that was perceptive but no... not to beat a dead horse but saying i moved out before then so everyone else should too... ridiculous
this was a hard watch. i’ve never seen this episode til now and i see why : ( like everyone else, this story 51:41 (about the step daughter) was just… wow. you can preach being all for being family oriented and still feel this way? it’s truly heartbreaking.
As a 22 year old living with family, I cannot imagine someone 10 years older then me trying to push me out of the house when I can’t afford it
Also the assumption the daughter wasn’t helping around the Blair is wild
Exactly! Like just because the step mom (who wrote the post) didn’t say if she contributed or not doesn’t mention she doesn’t! If she’s in a situation like mine she probably does some cleaning, cooking, contributing to the household fund, etc. Why did they immediately assume she’s some mooch?
Maybe she contributes, just not to the new wife, considering it's not her problem to raise their child for them.
I’m 22 and only moving because my parents are moving and I don’t want to come with them, it’s scary.
Its the fact that they were willing to literally help her with 2 months rent and help find a roommate and all that, and she has a full time job, and yet she still is like no i dont want to move out that shows that she's unwilling to become an adult and wants to keep mooching off her father, and pulling her father aside away from the step-mother is really shady
@@noahtrombley3339 i don't know where they live, but in my city even when you get a two room flat and get a roommate you have to pay up to 600 bucks. Just for your split.
And your room is as big as a closet.
Two months of rent won't save anything, especially when you have to pay deposit. We don't know what the daughter situation is, how much she gets payed if she is in an apprenticeship etc.
But the economic situation is awful rn, especially in my country you will have to pay ridiculous amounts for gas and energy rn.
We don't know how far she lives from her workplace, how she gets there etc.
I think it's just not a good way to handle it.
Just have the babys crib in the parents room or living room (that's how alot of familys used to do to that when you couldn't afford a bigger home for your growing family) and for the first some years try to figure out a play and get moving.
But kicking her out, out of the blue with just some months time of eviction is absolute bullocks.
Ngl, this episode had some of the absolute worst takes in it yet. I've watched all of these so far and I normally agree or at least get their point of view of the cast, but I cringed so hard at some of their assumptions and responses. News flash: putting yourself in a crappy spot and sacrificing yourself so others feel better about their shitty behavior is not always the right move. It especially got me when they said the kids should grow up thinking their father loves them even if he doesn't. That is just encouraging generational trauma. As someone who's father very much should not've been a part of my childhood, it's not healthy to do that to those children. The empathy is really in the wrong places in this video. I mean, they didn't stop for even a second to consider that the 23 year old who was told to move out probably felt like they were getting replaced. Between the stepmom and then being kicked out for a new baby to take their room? It must've crossed their mind that their father is just building a new family that doesn't include them and the stepmom solidified that because instead of discussing solutions she just told her to get out and that's that. The cast this time, instead of even considering the kids perspective, just ASSUMED they're a burden who is financially taking advantage of their father. This whole video gives me the ick 🙃
they called her immature for wanting to stay in her childhood home while the parents can't sacrifice their space to put a crib in their room? The baby's not even born yet and she has to give up the years that could help her get some actual stability. She's not the one who chose to have a baby.
PREACH. Putting the onus on the victim to be the bigger person is disgusting.
fat agree
Same. I've been absolutely enjoying this series, but this is the first time one of these videos pulled me out of what I was doing (I put these on as background noise) and scroll down to the comments to see if anybody else was thinking what I was thinking.
@@SapinoPhilimoanyup I listen while working and I had to stop what I was doing just to see if I was crazy
Rachel, girl, family first isn’t always the best policy. When you have toxic family members, sometimes supporting that person ISN’T the right move. Actions 👏🏼 have 👏🏼 consequences 👏🏼.
PREACH!! T H A N K YOU for saying this! I have a diagnosed malignant narcissist brother that's always acting this way (same as the person in this story), and he does NOT need to be awarded support for his bad behavior. Rachel, I would love for you to meet my trash can of a brother. He may flip the script on your views a bit. I know he sure killed my empathy meter for me.
My dad literally had sex with his gf in front of me. Didn't apologize and blamed me, doesn't think he was in the wrong. Blamed my brother for the divorce since he showed my mom evidence of him cheating. Thinks my brother "brainwashed" us into hating him. I could write a book on all the shit he's done. Literally the worst part is that he can't even conceive the thought he could be in the wrong. He charged is gf's daughter extra for toilet paper for using more because she has crohn's disease.
She's from Texas. As someone also from Texas, a lot of people here are raised with the "family is everything" mentality, and it can be very hard to break. I lucked out because my parents were not from here and don't have that view, but OMG, the number of people here who do is kinda scary.
THANK YOU!!! I was so upset by her response. It was very naive and enabling of negative behavior to continue
@@Seraphicsorcery i was so pissed of
My goodness
Defending the deadbeat son/father and saying “family is everything” then turning around and wanting the stepdaughter to get kicked out of her house is absolutely crazy. That gave me whiplash.
If you’re going to have awful takes, at least be consistent.
I’m so sick of the whole “well I suffered so you should too” mentality. There was no mention of the daughter not helping out around the house or being difficult to live with it’s purely because they were having a baby. I feel like it would be fair to try and work something out but clearly there was more to that story. For Rachel to say “you’re not an actual human adult until you move out” is insane. Also having a full time job doesn’t explain anything about how much money she makes or how long ago she left school. Also seeing how she defended that pos as if his family shouldn’t hold him accountable, I just know that if it was a step son the reaction would have been different. I hated them talking over Shayne but makes sense why he doesn’t usually let other people read because it’s harder to redirect and moderate
I love Damien. This episode made me so much more grateful for his empathy.
I remember watching some episodes of this Reddit series initially and being like “wow I love how these are so chill and these people take time to form opinions and talk about things thoroughly and understand if they’re complicated”, and now we’re here lmao
@@sunshineeee I feel it depends on how willing Shane is to speak up for his opinion. He pretty much just let them talk here, lol.
@@HeyMayais Yeah-(I should’ve used a tone tag lol), I wasn’t referring to that necessarily! Just more that oof this whole series is comprised of at worst decent overall takes, and mostly of well thought out discussions, but here it was like a slap in the face of the opposite in a really frustrating/tense manner(my original comment was intended to be a joking tone!) Although I would’ve preferred Shane give some pushback, letting the guests dig their own hole seemed like the better outcome in this instance honestly. /gen /neu /lh
More Damien please!
@@sunshineeee ok take this however you wish to but know its meant in good faith - what the FUCK are those tone indicators???? i get that s/ means sarcastic or whatever and /j means like joke but at what point are we confusing people more than clarifying intent? NOT EVEN TO MENTION that some people use /s as serious? theyve become too fkn disparate and decentralized to mean anything to more than just chronically online people so im sorry i have no idea what they mrean
I've been binging these and have had a fun time with all the episodes, and haven't even looked at the comments, BUT this episode frustrates me so much that I can't even finish it. Such a shame. Feel like this one could've (maybe even should've been) cut before being posted. Some of these takes are not just wild, but also extremely insulting
Seriously I think shane was literally just as uncomfortable as everyone watching are with the takes. Considering he’s extremely quiet this episode and doesnt seem to add much almost implying he doesn’t want to argue about it. Just sorta two people I dont want to see on this show again because they just don’t seem to understand the significance of the situations.
seriously I feel bad now after watching like half of it, they should at the very least put a warning on it because this is really unhealthy for anyone who has had issues with these sort of things
Yo literally same.
Been binging the series and this is the first one I've actually had to check the comments on, cause WTAF?
SAME. I've been going through all of them as my current content binge and I've never once went to the comments until this episode. This one was so bad it stopped me half an hour in.
I'm glad I'm not the only person who thinks "if the guests have a bad take and try to demonize a good intentioned person while shayne sits quietly because he definitely disagrees then i'm not finishing the video"
You know you’re saying some wild shit when Shayne just stares and nods in silence
Rachel really said "you should put your values to the side for a wedding"
Yeah.. 😬
Especially since he is in the wrong
I feel like they were putting too much emphasis on the fact that it’s a wedding. People usually do that because it’s a once in a lifetime event but when it’s the second one it’s not as important anymore. Regardless the son was still in the wrong for that so I wouldn’t have gone either way.
Weddings don't matter. Flat out. It's the least important day in any relationship, ESPECIALLY a healthy one.
@@dontmisunderstand6041 exactly! If you’re in a good and healthy relationship, good for you, you can legit just go to the courthouse and be done. Dude’s son is a shit head for thinking (1) that a marriage THAT EARLY in your adulthood will work out and (2) that his ex wife is supposed to be a stay at home mom just because it suits his view of what a relationship is supposed to be. I’d spend the day with my family members ex/parent to that family members children just to make sure they don’t do anything that could ruin their life or their kids lives and to make sure they’re in a healthy place mentally especially since she is in a town where she has little to no family of her own to help get her through this VERY RECENT and VERY HEAVY rough point in her life.
I've been binging these reddit stories for a few days now and every episode I catch myself thinking: "these people are so cool and so smart and so funny and just genuinely good human beings and I want to be friends with all of them!" and then there's this one... I paused the video to come check the comments to make sure it wasn't just me that was getting mad.
SAME!
Saaaame
Dood.......I'm a caregiver....and I had to excuse myself AT WORK to read some of these comments.......
Bro I feel like you summed up my reaction perfectly. This was wild.
YES
“Girl you’re 23” as someone struggling with severe anxiety regarding my age and the fact that i don’t have my life figured out the way i hope i would’ve that sent me in a tail spine. The complete lack of empathy from Rachel the entire episode was mind blowing. Thank you for the anxiety attack though. 10/10
THIS !!! some people move different with their timelines and for them to shame a 23 year old not knowing anything about her…
Yeah I'm kinda in the same boat as you. I'm someone who has the same fears and doubts about not having my "life together", and im about to be 23. Even though I KNOW its okay, even though my mom keeps telling me im young and its normal. Its these kinds of comments from others that reel my fears and doubts back to me. So yeah. Rachel? Shut up. Glad to see so many people against her shaming a 23 year old for not moving out. Makes me feel better and seen.
I had to turn the video off …
I know
Since I turned into an adult this year moving out is all I can think about
This story was definitely not something I needed
I'm 25 with anxiety, depression and eating disorders and I'm still with my parents because I needed time to find treatment that works for me. Only now after 3 years of proper treatment for the first time in my life I'm getting close to being able to move out but i still have some work to do.
It's ok that you are still with your parents, that you are still figuring things out. Ignore what she said because it sounds like she comes from a very ignorant and narrow minded point of view. Take the time to figure things out it's ok to take time. You are not alone
I whole heartedly disagree that you “can't live your life to the fullest” until you've left the home. To a LOT of people, family is everything. You should never feel embarrassed for not feeling ready to ”leave the nest.” 23 is young. Your brain has only just finished growing. Although I think it's beneficial to live on your own/with roommates, don't feel ashamed if that path isn't for you.
That whole “my life was hard so yours should be too” is the exact mentality that brought us to where we are today. It isn’t “building character.” It’s imposing generational trauma.
We are/were kids, we aren’t supposed to be strong, we aren’t supposed to be getting tough, we aren’t supposed to be ‘building character’.
We’re supposed to be safe, we’re supposed to be protected, we’re supposed to have a better life than the generation before us.
I could go more in-depth abt this or abt my own parent pet-peeves, but I’ll keep this short and simple for anyone reading this. Remember the sections above, and whenever you reflect on how you were raised and start siding with your parents’ reasoning, just remember what you read one time on the internet in a random RUclips comment.
They were supposed to make your life better than theirs.
You were supposed to be safe, not strong.
You were just a kid.
@@BB-TheCandleFairy May have the wording slightly wrong, but " [His son's mother]'s trying to protect him from the world. I'm trying to prepare him for the world. If he cannot handle me raising my voice to get his attention to see the bigger picture, he is not ready for a world that does not care about his feelings" - Gabriel Iglesias.
Also, "Great men are forged in fire" - John Hurt.
All of which to say, there are different styles of parenting for a reason. You want to be a shield, fine. But don't villify those who beleive in challenging their children, with real life if necessary
@@castleoffiction96 There's a difference between "real life" and "sharing a mattress with rats". The anecdotes Rachel has are not transferable to any sort of life lesson, and not wanting to move out because you know you're not ready is not an indicator that you're soft.
I would not say just cause one life was rough so should another but postponing your life waiting for things to be good is only going to stagnate your life. I mean real life is rarely going to be easy so if you are only waiting for things to be good or easy it's only going to postpone your life, which just seems rough. Wanting to stay at home to save money makes sense but if that person isn't paying rent or contributing to the household then they can't be upset that the home owners find themselves in a situation in which they can't continue the way things are going either.
@@castleoffiction96 if life is going to challenge them no matter what, then we don't need to put kids through unnecessary pain?? Making your kids childhood hard is only going to make it more difficult for them to be adults, having been a kid who experienced a lot of challenges, life would have been a lot easier if I could at least look back on good times. If anything, putting your kids through messed up stuff just makes it harder for them to deal with difficult things as an adult, you're breaking down their foundation, not building it up.
Rachel’s take on the daughter in law story is just wrong. I can’t be bothered to delve into every layer of it but it’s just wrong. Op’s son very clearly cheated. Op was right for not going to his son’s wedding. Also the daughter in law HAD NO ONE ELSE. Op explicitly pointed out how she didn’t have anyone else mainly because of his son.
Also, OP's son is clearly being abusive. He's isolated his ex (she has no friends or support system in town), expecting her to be the maid-cook-nanny-sex object. OP didn't say it in the main post, but you can see it in the comments from OP and in the main story it's heavily implied. The kids shouldn't be with OP's son. He doesn't care about them and OP is doing what his son should have done.
Agreed. I didn't like her take at all. She's definitely the enabling type.
She's one of those "but he's family" people.
@@sotrue5413 and it was nice to see Iffy subtly call her out on not seeing the difference between familial support versus enabling destructive behavior.
All she does is defend a literal abuser because he’s “family” BUT SO IS THE DIL AND HER KIDS!!! She became family the SECOND those kids were born, not to mention the son is abusive to DIL and she just IGNORES ALL OTHER OPINIONS she doesnt like. My opinion of her as a person has dropped significantly, and i hope nobody in her life has this issue and tries to come to her for support, because i know she’ll just make things worse
i’ve been binging all the reddit vids but this one was not it. i loved all the others bc rachel had me pretty heated. how can you literally say “don’t put a timeline on milestones” then IMMEDIATELY shit on a 23 yr old girl for still living at her dad’s place? fucking wild to me ALSO she straight up was enabling neglect when it was ab that deadbeat cheater.
“You should move out at 18, its societal”
“You dont have to get married and have kids, its just societal”
This! I started watching it recently and have been binging it. Until now I loved every guest (even if I didn't agree with everything they said), but this episode... geez. I'm happy this was not the first one I saw or I wouldn't keep watching.
!!! And then to acknowledge the cultural aspect of the 23 year old and still argue about it?? Sorry about your experience but the dad clearly has no problem with HIS daughter staying so why are you so angry about it? The parents are old enough to plan for a baby and it’s their responsibility to make space for it, the stepdaughter shouldnt be suddenly put out and pushed aside because of poor planning on their part. I can’t even finish it now which is so sad bc i also love all the others
Same here. I was actually listening to this while doing my laundry and I'm side eyeing most of the time and I definitely notice Shane's silence. I immediately check the comments after I finished my laundry and I'm really glad everyone seems to agree that this episode is a bit weird. But then again, its still nice that they still uploaded this and didn't edit it as much because again, this is about discussion and ofcourse we can disagree or agree about it.
I rewatch them on the background and this one I cant- its so bad
Hi! Came all the way from listening on Spotify because I needed to comment one thing.
Fuck Rachel's hypocritic opinions. The way she spoke about everything was exhausting. You're doing great though Shane keep being you
I’m here for the same reason I felt like I was crazy because these tales were ridiculous
Shayne's silence during the 23 y/o girl speaks volumens about Ify's and specially Rachel's shitty takes. He tried to talk a few times but Ify's and Rachel didn't let him, so he decided to better keep the peace and let them talk. And I get him, aganst these kind of people is better to be quiet, because is like talking to a wall. Really hope they never out them again on another episode.