Best Of Redditor Updates: My wife is addicted to the gym and it's ruining our marriage.
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- Опубликовано: 30 апр 2024
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My wife is addicted to the gym and it's ruining our marriage (w/ Updates)
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She's a cheater. Once a cheater, always a cheater. He goes for women that are taken. Wonder how long it'll take for one or the other to cheat. Forget revenge and let karma handle it. Live your best life and love that child.
They were probably already cheating on each other by the end of this story, tbh
@@m0L3ify I wouldn't be the least bit surprised! 😂
Once that kid is born he should immediately seek split custody, because if the AP can change her mind about things before the kid is born imagine how much trouble he's gonna have after the kid is born
My heart breaks for OP. I was going to the gym every day to try to get in shape like a year ago. Until some dude that I thought was just being friendly started hitting on me. So I stopped going unless hubby goes with me. I take longer walks with the dog or work out at home if he can’t come.
I will never understand how someone can “fall in love” with someone else if they are ACTUALLY in love with their partner. I’ve been with my guy for almost 14 years, and I *literally* cannot imagine my life without him.
Does he piss me off sometimes? Sure! I piss him off, too. 😂 We’ve had our ups and downs, but we’ve always been in the other’s corner when things get hard. We’re a team and I would never allow anyone to get in the middle of that.
We even work together now (been that way for almost 2 years), and while many people seem shocked by that when they hear it, it works incredibly well for us. My brain just can’t believe that OP’s wife was actually in love with him. Maybe she was in love with the idea of him or their relationship? Or maybe she just didn’t really grasp what loving someone else entailed. I hope he gets the emotional help he needs & can form a beautiful relationship with his child, despite her & the AP.
Hey, if you DON’T iss off you "SO" once in awhile, your notdoing marriage right! It's HOW you handle it that matters. Good luck & wishing you another 80yrs together.
@@wandering-neverlost9468 Thank you! And I agree 100%! I’m no expert, but in my experience, as long as you face disagreements with a healthy dose of love, patience, mutual respect, and good communication, most storms can be weathered. 💙💙💙
The nerve of that man. "She told me you didn't want me here, but I have no respect or boundaries, obviously."
Man, that was a wild ride. Poor dude, but apparently, he's having the last laugh already
OPs wife and AP won't be together very long. She's learning that she has shacked up with a selfish pos.
Perhaps, there are plenty of ways she ends up staying with him till he tires of her.
The wife abandoned him, she is not in a stable home, he needs to sue for full custody
OP should try for full custody!
I feel so sorry for this man, to feel like you are that easily replaced, not even with the affair but her moving in with the AP has got to be heartbreaking. It really sucks that it’s his child honestly because he simply can’t win in this situation.
That was a whole lot to unpack! Whew!
OP is already drowning, treading water and stuck in the misery of a life he can no longer have.
Heartbreaking.
I truly hope he can move on, make the life his child deserves and finds everything he himself deserves in the future.
I know it's callous, but all I can think about is why would he choose a partner who always runs from problems? Such partners will sooner or later come across a problem they can't run from and will drag you into it. And sure enough, his partner did just that in the worst possible way.
I'm sad he had to learn this the hard way, but hopefully in the future he won't see learned helplessness as "cute" and actually finds a woman with true integrity. He'll need such a partner if he is to co-parent with such a slimy, spineless, and pathetic thing as his ex who will be unable to protect their child from, well, anything.
The worst thing of all is the child will learn very fast that mom is weak-willed and unreliable. Such dynamics always has the child spending their life either propping mom up or trying desperately to disentangle themselves from mom.
OP, if you can, push for full custody whenever possible.
The AP is so using her for money. I just know that once they spend her half of the house proceeds it's essentially over. She do screwed.
I truly hope op gets full custody of that child.
Everytime Op wants to find out what is going on with his ex he needs to refocus on something that brings him peace of mind or at least movement forward. He needs to start a new hobby, move to a new place, plan a vacation or life goal. The more he stays focused on his "loss" the less he'll allow himself to move forward and be able to see it for what it was, a win. Anytime someone who justifies cheating leaves your life, it's a win.
She HIT HIM???
Jerry, Jerry, Jerry... This feels like it was on Jerry Springer back in the day
If they can't choose you over the other person, it's not you 99% of the time. Be done.
I hope he goes for primary custody & she only gets weekends or 3 days a week. I also hope he finds someone worthy of his time, attention, affection, & love. And after that happens AP cheats on OP's ex-wife! Karma is a Bitch & hopefully knows where she lives!
I can't help but wonder if the wife was on medication when she found out she was pregnant and stopped taking it immediately or weaned off of it. It seems like mental health issues are at play here. I have bipolar disorder, and this entire saga reminds me of the crazy things I did when I was still figuring out which medications worked for me (or not taking medication at all). OP told his soon-to-be ex not to bring her affair partner to his home, and she does so without giving him so much as a warning. She's made all these huge life changes without any regard for OP's wellbeing in the span of a couple of months. She constantly toggles between wanting her affair partner and wanting OP, which may or may not be a manipulative tactic. She's allowing her affair partner to be the sole decision-maker in their relationship. He sounds incredibly controlling, and she's behaving as if she's stuck in the situation when she's not. "I told him this, but he said this, so I'm going to do what HE wants." I would never make most of the life choices she's making now, but I have made huge, incredibly stupid choices just as she's doing while in a bad headspace. I entered into and stayed in a violently abusive relationship much too long while unmedicated, and it took time to escalate to that. The affair partner's behavior sounds eerily similar to my ex's behavior while he was love bombing me. In any case, I would not trust either of those people around my child. Poor OP.
Damn..... it just kept getting worse...
I highly doubt this will last. I hope the custody is fairly arranged and you get to build a great relationship with your child.
They will restore the texts when you get the phone repaired.
Two cheaters together?
It makes a healthy committed relationship next to impossible for longterm.
Gym AP sounds really like a ab**ive SO waiting to happen honestly if he's that pushy where he won't let HER decide anything without HIS okay. I fear deeply for that child once the baby is old enough to start making even the smallest choices for him or herself.
OP should definitely get a paternity test once the baby is born. She's obviously cheating. He should have called the police when she hit him. Should be recorded in case she tries to say he's the abusive one. Her saying she loves OP is total BS. You don't love someone and cheat on them. You don't hurt someone you love that way. I would make SURE he gets 50-50 custody. A good guy doesn't sleep with a married woman
Right now he doesn’t get to interact in regards to anything with his baby because she’s not around so all he can think about is revenge and the horrible things he can do. I used to do the same thing about my son’s donor, because anger helped me function through the hurt until the hurt stopped. I’m guessing once the baby is born, he’ll be able to focus much more on that and the idiot his wife had an affair with will be secondary and not even thought much about, unless he interferes with time with his child and visiting.
Blame shifting, gaslighting, and playing the victim. Classic behavior of a guilty person
Wow.
💚
Guy needs to quit looking at them and focus on him and being a dad to that little girl. Life will take care of his ex and the affair partner. One or both of them will cheat in time.
Sorry this is a hard one.
Unpopular opinion I guess: I found it problematic that he jumped into misogyny mode once he was hurt by her ("gym bike" "who would like a pregnant woman" etc), and the fact that he just reacted ignoring her is very bizarre to me. He was genuinely shocked that the other guy wanted to pick up "his trash", and confessed that he thought she would never leave just because he was familiar to her. Like he knew she wasn't in love already. He said he wanted the divorce just on the principle alone. Don't get me wrong, she sucks big time, she's a cheater, a liar and a coward, but it doesn't seem to me like they had the best foundation for a marriage already?
🙄🙄🙄🙄
She literally cheated on him and played him... He's hurt and wants to say hurtful things to the person WHO HURT HIM. If a person cheats on their spouse, THEY ARE TRASH!
Actually, everything he said is completely true. I've seen a very similar scenario play out in people I've known since middle school or high school, and he's allowed to vent his frustration, feelings, anger, hurt, deepest thoughts anonymously while going through such a difficult time in his life. That would be like my husband finding out in 8 weeks that I've been having an affair and "it might be his baby". It would DEVASTATE him. I can imagine my husband feeling all these things and thinking all of these things. It's one thing to be cheated on, it's a completely different situation with a first time pregnancy/baby, preparing for that, for your marriage to end, and to top it off possibly not being there for the birth of your child and having your ex and her AP in your life constantly reminding you of the wound. What he needs to do that he hasn't: therapy for himself. Ideally before the child is born. Talking to the lawyer about being able to see the birth of his child since they're still married, and he's her next of kin in case something happens during delivery or after. He has those rights. Like ok, he's said some mean things, he broke her phone and punched a man he told to get out of his house. Grand scheme of things, not the worst responses.
I feel awful for him because he's right, it's a weird fucking thing to be born into and deal with as a first time parent. He obviously cares very much which is why he has such a strong reaction to everything.
@@erauprcwa👏
@@erauprcwa Sure, I would hate my husband if he did that to me, but I wouldn't start calling him the n word... Also, I don't think he is with me just because I'm just this thing he is familiar with... I'm trying to say that my impression of their relationship is that they already didn't have the most loving marriage. Not a justification for cheating, there never is one, I just don't see they were crazy for each other, mutually.