I can’t get over Reddit deciding it’s homophobic to want YOUR dress to remain a dress. It’s extremely sweet that OP decided to give her daughter the dress after all, but she wasn’t homophobic in not wanting to. She wanted her memories of her late husband to fully stay in tact, and there is a chance that will be lost if the dress is altered. It really isn’t that difficult of a concept, and it frustrates me how easy some people reach for homophobia the second someone is doing anything that a queer person doesn’t like.
Right?! It honestly sounded like those commenters either A. Over read too much into everything so everyone is aggressive or B. They’ve never been married to a person they love and so they don’t understand the sentimental value of how important those things would be ESPECIALLY since her husband passed away when they were all so young.
I will not be giving my daughter my dress when she grows up 😅 alterations or not, passed away husband or not. It’s waaaay too sentimental to me and I’d rather see her find that “perfect dress” that fits HER. The experience of finding the dress is just as magical and sentimental as the dress itself. I never understand why moms/daughters do that, especially when they make such wild changes to the point it barely even looks like the original anymore.
Yea, OP said her daughter's fiance could wear it and they'd be fine to alter it to fit her, but not to split the dress, THERE IS A SIGNIFICANT DIFFERENCE IN *SPLITTLING* A DRESS *AND ALTERING THE BODDESS* and ALTERING IT TO BE BIGGER, THE DRESS ITSELF WOULD BE THE *SAME*
Right?! While I don’t think I would have been able to say that to my Dad I don’t understand how he could think 2 WEEKS is even remotely acceptable. My Mom passed away from breast cancer when I was around 16-17 years old. My Mom was sick and in and out of the hospital for 6 years. When she was first diagnosed they gave her 6 months at best and she said “ yall don’t know who the fuck I am “ and literally turned those months into years. My parents didn’t get along. I literally remember them fighting more often than I remember them getting along. At some point partially due to our house being too small my Dad slept in the living room and Mom slept in the bedroom with my younger siblings and for awhile myself. I’m sure there was other reasons why they slept separately. My Dad also snores loudly and my Mom was a very lite sleeper. Again they also didn’t always get along. All that being said my Dad did everything he possibly could to make life as good and as easy as possible and when she eventually passed away it was still very painful for him because I do know they both still had love for each other in their own weird way. I don’t remember my Dad ever bringing a girlfriend home to meet us until I was like 19 years old. My 2 younger siblings were 9 and 10 when Mom passed away and so maybe it was because they were so young. My Dad planned to never get married again I think he was looking for a companion. He was a very kind and loving man and nobody wants to grow old alone. Unfortunately the women in that age break atleast that he found were definitely single for a reason though they were all pretty nice many of them were fucking bananas dog and I mean atleast one of them was batshit crazy in a sketchy way. But my Dad is a fixer and wanted to save her. Eventually though he let her go thankfully. I wouldn’t have faulted my Dad for dating sooner than he did but 2 weeks is fucking crazy. Unfortunately we lost Dad to his own cancer back in 2017. He was the opposite of the Dad in this story and so again I am blown away!!!
The lying, the constant emotional manipulation, and choosing his mistress over comforting his grieving kid. He never cared about anyone but himself. His wife died suddenly within a month of illness and he immediately jumped in bed with his mistress. How do you have no emotions towards something like that? It was like he was waiting for his wife to die. He brought the mistress into the house immediately after and forced his kids to watch him disrespect the memory of their mother by parading around his betrayal. And you know they were sleeping together beforehand. The dad was always lying, why would he stop now? He's just trying to make it seem less egregious. He moved her into their house within 2 weeks of his wifes death. They were together long before what he's admitted to.
LMAO I thought something worse I think "to me, you are dead unlike my mother, because I will forever remember her, but I don't want anymore to know you"
The father is a liar. I don't believe for a second that he didn't have a physical relationship with his AP. I think they were having a full-blown affair. He just didn't want to admit it to his daughter. That guy will find another 'real love' and will cheat on the new wife, too. The fiancée 'on a break': she was going on a 6 week trip and decided they were on a break and she blocked him because she fully intended to cheat while she was away.I completely disagree with Sophia and Riley. OP doesn't owe her anything.
Yeah this is my thought as well. It took about 3.5 weeks to coordinate my aunt’s funeral … and we are still figuring out my aunt’s estate now and this guy already moved on?
I disagree with Sophia the fiancé does NOT owe ANYTHING to his fiancée. She broke up with him and block him, she blindsided him. Nothing is owe to her.
Oh man, I could have written that daughter’s story. Story time: I met my dad’s girlfriend for the first time 4 months after my mother’s death and he announced they were getting married. I tried to keep my grieving to myself, bc if it came out that I was missing my own mom- it was an insult to the new wife. I was 20 and he demanded I call her mom. I’m freaking out of the house already at this point. It didn’t matter what I did, I was against their marriage. Fast forward 15 years later and she found out from me that he remarried 6 months after my mom’s death. She went white and from that point forward was a bigger advocate to me than my dad ever was. Fast forward again and she passes in 2020. My dad was still convinced I was against their marriage. He declares he could never marry again because he’s grieving 2 wives now (yah think, bc I had this gut feeling he never got over mom.) The dude was a professional gaslighter and I’ll be working on not taking his blame the rest of my life.
I am into historical dressmaking and for centuries our bodices and skirts were separate pieces anyway. It would be very simple for a tailor or a seamstress to take the bodice off give it a fresh waistline and after the wedding it could be reattached to the skirt or you could put a permanent waistband on the skirt and wear them separately but together. This is totally doable. Also F my phone keyboard. 😂
if anyone else is confused, brain trust usually means a group of advisors, so when he said brain trust he was saying that she had went into the bathroom to text her friends for advice and ideas on how to proceed with the conversation.
I disagree with you guys on one thing, the chick who took the break before she decided to go on a trip? I’m assuming she did that to cheat. That’s the first thing that comes to mine and I’m sure that’s what OP was thinking. He doesn’t owe her a conversation. Because she sure as hell Didn’t have a conversation with him after telling him she wanted to go on a break while they were engaged. And said she let him sit for a week without saying a word. She owed him that much. So he doesn’t owe her a thing. Not even a conversation.it’s equal and therefore no one can say he owes her anything. Treat others how you want to be treated.
Foe the 1st time ever I disagree w the worm queen. There's no way I owe my ex fiancee anything. You didn't give me the decency of an explanation for the break, let me say my piece on the matter, AND blocked me so I can't contact her? Yeah no. At that point what makes you think I owe you an explanation for anything 😂😂😂
We all know what she was doing while over there! If you block your significant other, then you are hiding something and the only thing that would be relationship ending is cheating. Edit to add that I agree that as soon as she said that to me before walking onto a plane, I would know what she had planned and end it right then and there. She already made her decision about your relationship so there's no need to have a discussion about it! He didn't even really need to face her to get the ring back. She could have handed it over to a friend or even one of his family members.
True. They should meet if the op wants an answer and explanation. He should do it for himself as should any person who gets hurt like this. The deer doesn't owe the wolf who bit him.
The mother is not homophobic!!!! Family heirlooms are exactly that! To stay like that and being passed to next generation. I would NEVER alter my mom's wedding dress!
The girl in the last story definitely lived the single life on her trip. Her excuse that she needed to think about their relationship and wanted no contact doesn't explain why she was never posting on Instagram even though it sounds like that was an everyday thing for her.
The first story is very similar to my half sister (same father different mothers) . My step mom whom I didn’t get along with and she didn’t like me, passed away and within a day of us returning from her funeral our father went on a date with the step mothers “best friend” and acted as if there was nothing wrong with it. I didn’t like my step mom but I was very angry with our father for disrespecting her as well as my sister. He went MIA from that point forward. Said he was going to work and come to find out her was at the “best friends” house for two weeks a couple blocks away. He was caught because the “best friend’s” son was my little brother’s best friend and my brother could hear my father talking in the background over the game they played on Xbox
I lost my mother suddenly when I was 44 and it will always hurt. Grief is a lifelong walk. You need so much support on this journey, especially when it’s a parent, especially when you are teen.Theres so much you will want to share with mom that is not possible now. You needed your dad at this time to hold u in this new reality. But anyway glad u are in therapy! It helps !
26:08 people calling the mom homophobic are reaching. Homophonia is real, it happens a lot and acting like this is homophobia is minimizing what homophobia really is imo.
I don't think it's homophobic to expect someone who's female to wear a dress. She just didn't want to loose the memories of the dress. My mum's the same but if she forces me into a wedding I'm wearing a black wedding dress, despite her wanting me to wear white. She's old fashioned, where they expect girls to look like girly and guys to look manly. She's pregudiced at most towards how people look.
@@rainmeh4255 exactly. She, also, eventually became aware of her own expectations and worked through that. Also, I love the idea of a black wedding dress, they look incredible at weddings.
@@snicole042well some of you homophobes go out of your way to physically harm and dehumanize people simply because you “disagree with them” . So you seem like little cowards to me. The OP of the story isn’t homophobic. Freaks that hate people so much that they go out of their way to harm them, chastise them, and belittle them are. Understood?
@@snicole042also have you not seen all of the people online losing their minds over rainbows being in classrooms? Or burning books? Or trashing items they bought simply because a company supports pride month? lol definitely seem like little pussies to me
It sounds like the father has zero emotional maturity. It’s one thing to not really love your wife the mother of your children to easily replace with another woman but to not even care about your child’s feelings and emotions. I think this father sounds psychopathic. The mother fulfilled his needs until she couldn’t and died and he quickly replaced her with another. This next woman is a fool. If this isn’t a massive red flag then I don’t know what is. So this next woman should expect that her now husband can quite easily move on from her shoulder they break up or she was on her death bed. To see a father not care about his daughter and put a new woman in his life over his child speaks volumes of his character. This father also cries to manipulate. Probably worked for him in the past as he relies on others to care about his feelings and emotions despite his lack of for others feelings and emotions.
A girl's group can be incredibly supportive, but equally destructive at times. Since this was such a long vacation, I tend to assume she is the first among her clique to be married. Several of the others could be jealous, and persuade her that this was a test of the relationship, or some other BS. She likely only realized afterwards that her sisters really didn't have her back.
Depending in the time period the story takes place. It may have been safer for op's daughter to dress like a female instead of a male. Just recently started to be more accepting of that kind of stuff. That doesn't mean she was homophobic. That means she just wanted her daughter to be safe.
Yep, as a mother, that was my first thought, too, when they were kind of bashing her for trying to protect her daughter from judgey conservatives & whatnot. It's a mom thing to want to keep our kids safe, even when they're grown. It comes with the territory! 🥰
Reddit is quick to jump to homophobia. My ex husband was caught talking to other men during our marriage and decided he wanted to be a woman during our subsequent divorce and I posted there for support and was ripped to shreds for not understanding why his cheating was fine 😂
I mean both things can be true. Your ex can be a shitty person for cheating on you AND you can be in the wrong for your current behavior. Like this right here is transphobic.
My dad moved in the woman he met online from the Philippines that he would text while sitting next to my mom as she got chemo treatments. Like a month after my mom had passed the woman was already in the house. He’d been cheating on my mom for 20 years before she was diagnosed with cancer with random women he’d meet online or at sleazy bars. He’s a gross person.
i feel like ppl are forgetting that the dress also has significance to the mother as well. there’s a difference between making slight alterations to the size, but cutting it up and making it something completely different when it has such sentimental value is not ideal
They used to have different mourning times, guys would onlyt have to wait to marry a short while and women way longer with far more rules. After all, he was only mourning a mere woman. But even that wasn't two weeks.
Oooh boy, I'm a bisexual woman and there is no way this is homophobia. She supported her daughters wedding to a woman, she supported her by agreeing to let her use the dress and then had second thoughts because of the potential of it being completely changed from it's original state. It's not about the tux, and even if it was, clothing.does.not.make.you.gay. Now marrying the same sex because you love them? THATS gay. She never disagreed with the wedding. She never disagreed with her daughter wearing a tux. She simply thought deeper on her dress being changed so drastically. It is really irritating to see so many people stretch this to homophobia knowing damn well we get teased as "snowflakes" for being "offended" by everything. This is the kind of thing that furthers those negative thoughts and mindsets about people in the LGBTQ community. OP needs to take all of those comments and throw them in the bin, never should have had to have answered questions that were asked or statements that were said by people who have a lack of critical thinking and want something to cry about. I'm sorry but THIS is why i've distanced myself from the community. Just like I've distanced myself from the feminist movement, too many extremists make the WHOLE culture and community about them and you end up walking on eggshells if you don't fit the mold of the "perfect gay person" or "perfect feminist" or hell even the "perfect ally". I'm sure someone will get mad at my wording but that would just prove my point.
My mother (my dad agreed with her) would force me into a dress/skirt all the time, especially if I had to go to church. Because "you have to look presentable to god" I hated it, love trousers and I'm not lesbian (I think) just hate skirts and wear them a few times a year, when I "dress up".
The 1st story hit me hard. My father passed away in Nov 2021. May of 2022, on my parent's 39th wedding anniversary, she met a guy. Sep 2022, 4 months after meeting, AT MY AUNTS WEDDING, he proposed to her. May 2023, a year and 6 months after her husband of 38 and a half years passed away, 3 days before their anniversary, and married him. They attempted to plan a big wedding, but no one RSVP. They also had the same honeymoon as my parents.
Here's the thing, to take a break in a relationship it has to be discussed before hand and mutually agreed upon, with clearly defined boundaries about what is and is not acceptable during said break, and have both parties consent. If not then you are just ending the relationship. She clearly just wanted to go have sex with a bunch of people on her trip and decided if I tell him we are on a break then he can't be mad at me for cheating. Any decision in a relationship, that effects the relationship (ie: breaks, physical intimacy, combining finances, major purchases with combined finances, moving, allowing someone else to live with you and so many more) has to have consent from both parties or the relationship should not exist in the first place. The only exception to that is ending the relationship, that one person's can decide on their own. She decided unilaterally that they were going to be on a break so she could go cheat for 6 weeks, told him in the literal last minute she was seeing him for the 6 weeks then blocked him, SHE ended that relationship then boarded a plane to go sleep her way around Europe with her college friends.
36:15 I agree Riley. A “break” is a breakup because obviously something isn’t working in the relationship and in a normal relationship (not this one) the relationship needs to end and if the two people get back together that’s a new relationship and it doesn’t happen for a while. “Breaks” are a breakup lite. I don’t understand the ‘rules’ and am not gonna sit in limbo I’d rather heal with closure. I think needing space is healthy but a break is a breakup.
my Dad started dating his longtime coworker, only a couple months after my mom died. My sister was highly upset that he moved on so fast. i wasn't. Our case was a little different. My mom had been sick for 10 years. She told my dad to remarry and "be happy." Specifically, she wanted him to marry her best friend (who hadn't had a relationship since her fiance passed away in her 20s). The best friend was not interested 😂😂😂😂 but they did remain friends. My dad and i spent years taking care of my mom. Not only did he have her blessing to move on, but my dad and i suddenly had all these blocks of free time which were just empty. When you have all day, every day to sit and grieve an event that was honestly not very surprising (although still depressing and traumatic)... you can process it very quickly. We didn't clean out her things for 3 years. But my dad hadn't gotten laid for many years before my mom left. i was not even a little bit salty for him going to get some expeditiously 🥴🥴
To be clear about the wedding dress: it is totally possible to make the bodice and skirt separates while maintaining the integrity of the dress so that it can still be worn as such. There are a few designs where it is more difficult to do so, but unless it is a very unusual style of dress it shouldn’t be a problem. It isn’t as significant of a change as OP seems to think it is
I clicked because of the title. My dad was already talking to his next wife while my mom was sick, and just 6 months after she passed, they got engaged. 1 year and 2 months after my mom passed, they got married. Me and my brother were still relatively young- he didn't consider what was best for us at all. I was 8 going on 9 when my mom passed, and they wed a few weeks before I turned 10. My brother is 4 years older and was in 8th grade when he wed her. The lady hated kids and expected us to cater to her like we were the help. My dad ended up dying 4 years later, so I got to go live with my mom's sister ❤
My mother met my stepfather a couple months after his wife of around 20 years died and they married a few months later, and their relationship is a very good one and I'm very happy for them. (He's very good to her, which I was concerned about because my father was not.) That being said, generally I do believe people might want to consider waiting before looking for someone, especially with a relationship that had lasted for a long time.
The story about the dress reminds me of that one movie, "27 dresses" where the younger sister completely cuts up the deceased mothers dress. Some people just are not as emotionally invested when it comes to objects. It happens. Just two people, With different view points when it comes to the significance of material possessions
7:00 in Mexico this happened with a 2 famous people a couple of decades ago. There was this young actress that was married to her 2nd husband. She had a girl from a previous marriage with another famous actor, and a baby with her current husband. One day pulling off from a parking spot she saw through the review mirrior two arm thugs that robbed them. She had a heart attack right there and passed away, she was inher thirties. She was a beloved artist her whole family was in the show biz and well known. It was so sad to see them all grieving for her. Not even a month after we all found out her widow married a famous singer. Of course they were attacked by everyone. Over the years it got lighter but nobody forgot or felt sorry when they said they felt bad for being attacked for getting married so soon after his wife's death, and claimed there was nothing previously between them. But even if they weren't, it was still not ok.
Is there a maximum limit for how many months you have to wait before dating after your other half dies?? My hubby is alive so it is not really applicable, but we are married for almost 29 years and we are together for almost 36,5 years... Not sure I would want to get in to another relationship if I lost my hubby, but I think there should be a maximum to Sam's rule.
42:30 I think the brain trust was her friend group. Like, I think they hyped her up about how this fight would go and when OP didn’t follow that script, she had to go back to her friends and regroup.
The brain trust means OP’s GF went to the ladies room to call her girls to get a good defense on his switch of tactics. He’s saying obviously they couldn’t come up w/a thing. Go, Kappa Alpha Theta
The brain trust = the group of her friends who may be helping her figure out how to respond or act in this situation. A brain trust is just a group of minds who come together to brainstorm, discuss, ideate.
Anyone who tries to blame the kid for the parent neglecting the child. Please remember the child is a product of the parent. It's a child is not behaving or acting out in any way there is a high possibility that it is the parent's fault. So the child is grieving the loss of her mother and she is acting out as brat that is what you need to be a parent and step in and help console your child and at least hold her hand through the grieving process since they are too young to experience this type of grief. It doesn't matter what the child did or why. The parent is responsible and the fact the parent was neglectful when they needed to be there is not child's fault.
I think the damn rad fams need to shut the hell up over this dress, I literally grew up with a sister who went through a lot of these things, because these people clearly are not thinking they do not understand how cruel people can be to a child just because they're different, I'm glad my mom waited till my sister was strong enough to defend herself before letting her cut her hair and dress mascuine because I don't even want to know how those assholes at family events would have made her feel when she was too young to defend herself. They don't know s*** if they're saying that the mom was wrong for trying to protect her daughter for as long as she could before allowing her daughter to blossom into who they were, when she knew they were strong enoygh to stand the push back. And on the topic of the dress, ITS HER DRESS, Op can do whatever the hells she wants with it! I wouldn't want a significant dress to me having the skirt taken off of it either! It just doesn't make sense to significantly alter a dress that belonged to her mother when it doesn't fit her style already, if she wants a connection to her father it would make far more sense if she took something from her father's old wardrobe to incorporate into the suit she wants to wear for her wedding. I'm sick of people trying to make people like this mother seem like they're homophobic simply because they have boundaries with THEIR OWN STUFF. This woman loves and supports her daughter these people need to shut up.
On the topic of long engagements: my fiance and I have been engaged since the beginning of COVID. We are both transmasc, don't want our dead names on our marriage license, and keep having financial crises that prevent the $3-700 fees for two name changes. I guess I think there should be a good reason to wait, because if we had our names already, we'd probably be married by now.
In the first story op when being shutdown by her dad, by saying she's too young, she should have said "well if you're gonna shut me up now I am glad to not go to your wedding" then walk out
Story 1: stinky man trying to justify his stinkiness; father is the AH Story 2: I think we read this one before 🤔🤔and while Op is not 100% the AH in this story, but her kid is asking for a piece of her parent(s) on her person. The homophobic comments were people REALLY jumping to conclusions Story 3: asking for a break at fiancé level is unhinged!!
Now I'm curious what kind of infection she got, it's interesting that she got sick AFTER they started spending time together. As a true crime junkie, this scenario is SO much more common than anyone could imagine. JS
i low key love this mom. i hope things worked out but the realization that the mom saw her daughter's kid self as the her real self & that was holding her back is 👌🏿💪🏿 28:30 Sophia says the mother's fears were not important & I hard disagree. I want to remind anyone who sees this that it's still dangerous to be gay/trans/etc. violence still happens & some are murdered. to me, it's like a black mom telling her son to be mindful of his size and skin tone & others responding with it doesn't matter what people think. granted one has a bit of choice as far as what you do & no matter what I do, people will see me as a big black man. the mom wasn't an ahole & I agree letting the daughter express herself but that doesn't mean the mother's fears weren't warranted.
I disagree with Sofia in the ex fiancée story. She blocked him and left for weeks asking for a break just to be single and do what she wanted on the trip. He does not owe her anything, no conversation, nothing. He gave her the opportunity of a conversation to get the ring back, she didn’t even deserve that.
Man even the victorians grieved longer than two weeks (the men 'only' mourned for 6 months, women for up to 2 years) - in a society where widowers got to quit 'early' compared to widows they still would find 2 weeks immoral
The second story, the mom is not homophobic. How we all grew up is different. She never forced her daughter. She just loved her dress which is normal especially that her husband is gone. This was wrong of people to attack her for.
I'm in a long engagement because we fell on a hard financial situation shortly after we got engaged, but we're saving together to make it happen next spring.
Jobs never give you enough time off for bereavement. The state of GA gave me 3 days when an immediate family died. Years before when my dad died my job in a sewing factory gave me 2 weeks. Both are too short but the 3 days the state allowed is ridiculous.
36:16 that girl wanted to cheat, and say "WE WERE ON A BREAK" ( Friends style)🤣🤣🤣 47:35 she made it sound she was going to a third world country with no cellphone reception. It's fricking Europe
7:11 Just came here to say this! You guys!!!!!! I saw that. I clocked that. I know😂😂😂 I knew it, I know it. 😊😊. Who else sees it?? Don’t say what I’m talking about just say if you know it too 😉 I’ve been saying it. I know some others have noticed as well.
27:58 I feel like there are FAR too many redditters wanting to call her homophobic and it’s CLEARLY because she wants to keep her meaningful wedding dress as close to in take as possible. SHES NOT THE ASSHOLE TO WANT TO SAVE HER WEDDING DRESS AS A FUCKING DRESS!! I would offer my daughter my wedding dress but about 6 months ago it was unfortunately lost in a fire. We lost a lot of meaningful and devastating important sentimental family heirlooms.
@amybellamy5130 Thank you so much I really appreciate that. I'm definitely looking into fireproof safes but I wish it's something I had before hand. I would never of been able to save everything but I would have been able to save alot more than the small handful of items that were thankfully at my siblings houses.
@Raraking4796 I can only imagine. My heart breaks just thinking of what you must be feeling! I hope you're able to find ways to easily replace anything that can be replaced. This may seem silly or dumb (it's something I would do, so yeah... I guess that checks out 🤭), but for the things you aren't able to physically replace, maybe take some time to write a little tribute to those things - what they meant to you/reminded you of, how you'll remember them, and maybe what you learned from losing them & how that will help you going forward to make sure your futures treasures are kept safe? I don't mean to be bossy - I'm just a big weirdo and silly shit makes life a little easier, at least in the world as I know it! 🖤
First story, dad never grieved his wife I refuse to believe he did Second story, op is not being homophobic, it’s obvious she doesn’t wanna make crazy changes to her dress especially the dress she married her late husband in. And she even offered it for her daughter’s fiancé (how is that homophobic) obviously it didn’t happen because of the crazy alterations that would need to be made but she tried to have it included and it just didn’t work out. She’s trying
I’m confused why the op is being labeled “homophobic” for saying it was difficult to dress her daughter, her verbiage was not “I had to force her to wear dresses” so we don’t know what difficulty consists of. I personally was difficult to dress for basic events, and I don’t identify as anything other than my birth certificate but dislike clothing not conducive to nap time 😂 Without context it says more about the event than them or myself IMO Some things aren’t complicated and should be left at face value.
While I don't think the mom is homophobic, or that She should feel pressured to let her daughter use the dress etc. I do think she could have won some points with her daughter had she suggested they go suit shopping instead of dress shopping. I feel like I would understandably be frustrated as the mother, feeling torn etc. However as the daughter I would also feel like I wasn't being listened to/understood if after not only telling my mother I wanted to wear a suit for my wedding, but that I wanted to turn her dress int a suit and she suggested we could go dress shopping. The story turned out sweet though.
Lady blocking her fiancé while in Italy: He doesn’t owe her anything. She BLOCKED him, if she wanted to talk, she could have talked to him then. She’s made her choice now lie in bed.. or whatever that saying is.
I can’t get over Reddit deciding it’s homophobic to want YOUR dress to remain a dress. It’s extremely sweet that OP decided to give her daughter the dress after all, but she wasn’t homophobic in not wanting to. She wanted her memories of her late husband to fully stay in tact, and there is a chance that will be lost if the dress is altered. It really isn’t that difficult of a concept, and it frustrates me how easy some people reach for homophobia the second someone is doing anything that a queer person doesn’t like.
Right?! It honestly sounded like those commenters either A. Over read too much into everything so everyone is aggressive or B. They’ve never been married to a person they love and so they don’t understand the sentimental value of how important those things would be ESPECIALLY since her husband passed away when they were all so young.
I will not be giving my daughter my dress when she grows up 😅 alterations or not, passed away husband or not. It’s waaaay too sentimental to me and I’d rather see her find that “perfect dress” that fits HER. The experience of finding the dress is just as magical and sentimental as the dress itself. I never understand why moms/daughters do that, especially when they make such wild changes to the point it barely even looks like the original anymore.
Me neither. I don't keep to much, but what I do, I cherish, and I don't want then altered I anyway. I would have had the same reaction
Reddit is a cesspool.
Yea, OP said her daughter's fiance could wear it and they'd be fine to alter it to fit her, but not to split the dress, THERE IS A SIGNIFICANT DIFFERENCE IN *SPLITTLING* A DRESS *AND ALTERING THE BODDESS* and ALTERING IT TO BE BIGGER, THE DRESS ITSELF WOULD BE THE *SAME*
Perhaps I'm just heartless but I totally would've told my dad "it should've been you" 🤷🏼♀️
Right?! While I don’t think I would have been able to say that to my Dad I don’t understand how he could think 2 WEEKS is even remotely acceptable. My Mom passed away from breast cancer when I was around 16-17 years old. My Mom was sick and in and out of the hospital for 6 years. When she was first diagnosed they gave her 6 months at best and she said “ yall don’t know who the fuck I am “ and literally turned those months into years. My parents didn’t get along. I literally remember them fighting more often than I remember them getting along. At some point partially due to our house being too small my Dad slept in the living room and Mom slept in the bedroom with my younger siblings and for awhile myself. I’m sure there was other reasons why they slept separately. My Dad also snores loudly and my Mom was a very lite sleeper. Again they also didn’t always get along. All that being said my Dad did everything he possibly could to make life as good and as easy as possible and when she eventually passed away it was still very painful for him because I do know they both still had love for each other in their own weird way. I don’t remember my Dad ever bringing a girlfriend home to meet us until I was like 19 years old. My 2 younger siblings were 9 and 10 when Mom passed away and so maybe it was because they were so young. My Dad planned to never get married again I think he was looking for a companion. He was a very kind and loving man and nobody wants to grow old alone. Unfortunately the women in that age break atleast that he found were definitely single for a reason though they were all pretty nice many of them were fucking bananas dog and I mean atleast one of them was batshit crazy in a sketchy way. But my Dad is a fixer and wanted to save her. Eventually though he let her go thankfully. I wouldn’t have faulted my Dad for dating sooner than he did but 2 weeks is fucking crazy. Unfortunately we lost Dad to his own cancer back in 2017. He was the opposite of the Dad in this story and so again I am blown away!!!
The lying, the constant emotional manipulation, and choosing his mistress over comforting his grieving kid. He never cared about anyone but himself. His wife died suddenly within a month of illness and he immediately jumped in bed with his mistress. How do you have no emotions towards something like that? It was like he was waiting for his wife to die. He brought the mistress into the house immediately after and forced his kids to watch him disrespect the memory of their mother by parading around his betrayal.
And you know they were sleeping together beforehand. The dad was always lying, why would he stop now? He's just trying to make it seem less egregious. He moved her into their house within 2 weeks of his wifes death. They were together long before what he's admitted to.
Don't do that. You are an AH Brook.
@@dudeorduuude5211 I don't have a reason to my dad isn't that sick of a person.
LMAO I thought something worse I think "to me, you are dead unlike my mother, because I will forever remember her, but I don't want anymore to know you"
The father is a liar. I don't believe for a second that he didn't have a physical relationship with his AP. I think they were having a full-blown affair. He just didn't want to admit it to his daughter.
That guy will find another 'real love' and will cheat on the new wife, too.
The fiancée 'on a break': she was going on a 6 week trip and decided they were on a break and she blocked him because she fully intended to cheat while she was away.I completely disagree with Sophia and Riley. OP doesn't owe her anything.
Nah, it's all he was willing to admit to.
Fully agree on both points.
Wow! Two weeks! In some places people have hardly had a funeral in two weeks.
Yeah this is my thought as well. It took about 3.5 weeks to coordinate my aunt’s funeral … and we are still figuring out my aunt’s estate now and this guy already moved on?
I disagree with Sophia the fiancé does NOT owe ANYTHING to his fiancée. She broke up with him and block him, she blindsided him. Nothing is owe to her.
💯 agree!
Oh man, I could have written that daughter’s story.
Story time:
I met my dad’s girlfriend for the first time 4 months after my mother’s death and he announced they were getting married.
I tried to keep my grieving to myself, bc if it came out that I was missing my own mom- it was an insult to the new wife. I was 20 and he demanded I call her mom. I’m freaking out of the house already at this point.
It didn’t matter what I did, I was against their marriage. Fast forward 15 years later and she found out from me that he remarried 6 months after my mom’s death. She went white and from that point forward was a bigger advocate to me than my dad ever was. Fast forward again and she passes in 2020. My dad was still convinced I was against their marriage. He declares he could never marry again because he’s grieving 2 wives now (yah think, bc I had this gut feeling he never got over mom.)
The dude was a professional gaslighter and I’ll be working on not taking his blame the rest of my life.
I am into historical dressmaking and for centuries our bodices and skirts were separate pieces anyway. It would be very simple for a tailor or a seamstress to take the bodice off give it a fresh waistline and after the wedding it could be reattached to the skirt or you could put a permanent waistband on the skirt and wear them separately but together. This is totally doable.
Also F my phone keyboard. 😂
if anyone else is confused, brain trust usually means a group of advisors, so when he said brain trust he was saying that she had went into the bathroom to text her friends for advice and ideas on how to proceed with the conversation.
I immediately said she's calling her friends!
That was my take on that one, too 🤜🏻💥🤛🏻
I disagree with you guys on one thing, the chick who took the break before she decided to go on a trip? I’m assuming she did that to cheat. That’s the first thing that comes to mine and I’m sure that’s what OP was thinking. He doesn’t owe her a conversation. Because she sure as hell Didn’t have a conversation with him after telling him she wanted to go on a break while they were engaged. And said she let him sit for a week without saying a word. She owed him that much. So he doesn’t owe her a thing. Not even a conversation.it’s equal and therefore no one can say he owes her anything. Treat others how you want to be treated.
I said the same thing !!!
Foe the 1st time ever I disagree w the worm queen. There's no way I owe my ex fiancee anything. You didn't give me the decency of an explanation for the break, let me say my piece on the matter, AND blocked me so I can't contact her? Yeah no. At that point what makes you think I owe you an explanation for anything 😂😂😂
Agreed
We all know what she was doing while over there! If you block your significant other, then you are hiding something and the only thing that would be relationship ending is cheating.
Edit to add that I agree that as soon as she said that to me before walking onto a plane, I would know what she had planned and end it right then and there. She already made her decision about your relationship so there's no need to have a discussion about it! He didn't even really need to face her to get the ring back. She could have handed it over to a friend or even one of his family members.
True. They should meet if the op wants an answer and explanation. He should do it for himself as should any person who gets hurt like this. The deer doesn't owe the wolf who bit him.
The mother is not homophobic!!!! Family heirlooms are exactly that! To stay like that and being passed to next generation. I would NEVER alter my mom's wedding dress!
The girl in the last story definitely lived the single life on her trip. Her excuse that she needed to think about their relationship and wanted no contact doesn't explain why she was never posting on Instagram even though it sounds like that was an everyday thing for her.
38:00 honestly she doesn't deserve to talk to OP after she just drops the bombshell of "taking a break". She doesn't deserve shit
The first story is very similar to my half sister (same father different mothers) . My step mom whom I didn’t get along with and she didn’t like me, passed away and within a day of us returning from her funeral our father went on a date with the step mothers “best friend” and acted as if there was nothing wrong with it. I didn’t like my step mom but I was very angry with our father for disrespecting her as well as my sister. He went MIA from that point forward. Said he was going to work and come to find out her was at the “best friends” house for two weeks a couple blocks away. He was caught because the “best friend’s” son was my little brother’s best friend and my brother could hear my father talking in the background over the game they played on Xbox
The brain trust was him insinuating that she went to the bathroom to contact her gal pals for advice on what to do and they came up empty.
Hearing how you two call your mothers when on a trip warmed my heart ❤️
I lost my mother suddenly when I was 44 and it will always hurt. Grief is a lifelong walk. You need so much support on this journey, especially when it’s a parent, especially when you are teen.Theres so much you will want to share with mom that is not possible now. You needed your dad at this time to hold u in this new reality. But anyway glad u are in therapy! It helps !
26:08 people calling the mom homophobic are reaching. Homophonia is real, it happens a lot and acting like this is homophobia is minimizing what homophobia really is imo.
I don't think it's homophobic to expect someone who's female to wear a dress. She just didn't want to loose the memories of the dress. My mum's the same but if she forces me into a wedding I'm wearing a black wedding dress, despite her wanting me to wear white. She's old fashioned, where they expect girls to look like girly and guys to look manly. She's pregudiced at most towards how people look.
@@rainmeh4255 exactly. She, also, eventually became aware of her own expectations and worked through that. Also, I love the idea of a black wedding dress, they look incredible at weddings.
It’s not real. Being phobic means you have fear, not agreeing with something does not mean you’re in fear. That makes no sense.
@@snicole042well some of you homophobes go out of your way to physically harm and dehumanize people simply because you “disagree with them” . So you seem like little cowards to me. The OP of the story isn’t homophobic. Freaks that hate people so much that they go out of their way to harm them, chastise them, and belittle them are. Understood?
@@snicole042also have you not seen all of the people online losing their minds over rainbows being in classrooms? Or burning books? Or trashing items they bought simply because a company supports pride month? lol definitely seem like little pussies to me
It sounds like the father has zero emotional maturity. It’s one thing to not really love your wife the mother of your children to easily replace with another woman but to not even care about your child’s feelings and emotions. I think this father sounds psychopathic. The mother fulfilled his needs until she couldn’t and died and he quickly replaced her with another. This next woman is a fool. If this isn’t a massive red flag then I don’t know what is. So this next woman should expect that her now husband can quite easily move on from her shoulder they break up or she was on her death bed. To see a father not care about his daughter and put a new woman in his life over his child speaks volumes of his character. This father also cries to manipulate. Probably worked for him in the past as he relies on others to care about his feelings and emotions despite his lack of for others feelings and emotions.
Omg! Riley inviting us all to a live that happened probs 2 weeks ago is kinda the best 😂
Hey OKOP fam. My mother passed away today. I may be MIA a while but I’ll be back. ❤
I'm sorry for your lost and hope that you get the support you need. We will still be here for you.
Sorry for your loss. We will always be here for you waiting when your ready ❤
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending love❤
I can't comment on the reg chat :/
Im so sorry... I just saw ur comment :/ I hope you're ok. Thoughts and prayers... we love u
How can you claim homophobia when she is not only paying for the wedding but also OFFERED it to the bride!
A girl's group can be incredibly supportive, but equally destructive at times. Since this was such a long vacation, I tend to assume she is the first among her clique to be married. Several of the others could be jealous, and persuade her that this was a test of the relationship, or some other BS. She likely only realized afterwards that her sisters really didn't have her back.
That first story was wildddddd
Depending in the time period the story takes place. It may have been safer for op's daughter to dress like a female instead of a male. Just recently started to be more accepting of that kind of stuff. That doesn't mean she was homophobic. That means she just wanted her daughter to be safe.
Yep, as a mother, that was my first thought, too, when they were kind of bashing her for trying to protect her daughter from judgey conservatives & whatnot. It's a mom thing to want to keep our kids safe, even when they're grown. It comes with the territory! 🥰
Sophia and Riley are my fave duo ❤ I love days that they host 🎉
Reddit is quick to jump to homophobia. My ex husband was caught talking to other men during our marriage and decided he wanted to be a woman during our subsequent divorce and I posted there for support and was ripped to shreds for not understanding why his cheating was fine 😂
This world is fucked!!!
Sorry to hear that by the way. It’s like mourning the man you married and your marriage in so many ways that people don’t understand
I mean both things can be true. Your ex can be a shitty person for cheating on you AND you can be in the wrong for your current behavior. Like this right here is transphobic.
@@thevoidbender cheating is cheating regardless of who it was with. It's not transphobic just because they are trans. Trans people can also be shitty.
7:16 That Look at each other, After je said, that he knows how fast a realationship can go in two weeks ❤🎉❤
Dumb fiancee: Teehee, let's take a break.
OP: Okay, I'm BREAKING up with you.
My dad moved in the woman he met online from the Philippines that he would text while sitting next to my mom as she got chemo treatments. Like a month after my mom had passed the woman was already in the house. He’d been cheating on my mom for 20 years before she was diagnosed with cancer with random women he’d meet online or at sleazy bars. He’s a gross person.
Tinfoil hat: did the dad in first story “help” the mom to her death?
My bio dad did the same thing but got married in the month...yeah
OMG I'm so sorry 😞
So sorry you lost both your parents.
It was a long time ago thank you all, hurts my heart for op 10000%
tbh at this point it feels like the channels belongs to Sophia and Riley and boys are just guests lol
i feel like ppl are forgetting that the dress also has significance to the mother as well. there’s a difference between making slight alterations to the size, but cutting it up and making it something completely different when it has such sentimental value is not ideal
They used to have different mourning times, guys would onlyt have to wait to marry a short while and women way longer with far more rules. After all, he was only mourning a mere woman. But even that wasn't two weeks.
As a women I wouldn’t even go into the home that quick she’s in the wrong as well.
Oooh boy, I'm a bisexual woman and there is no way this is homophobia. She supported her daughters wedding to a woman, she supported her by agreeing to let her use the dress and then had second thoughts because of the potential of it being completely changed from it's original state. It's not about the tux, and even if it was, clothing.does.not.make.you.gay. Now marrying the same sex because you love them? THATS gay. She never disagreed with the wedding. She never disagreed with her daughter wearing a tux. She simply thought deeper on her dress being changed so drastically. It is really irritating to see so many people stretch this to homophobia knowing damn well we get teased as "snowflakes" for being "offended" by everything. This is the kind of thing that furthers those negative thoughts and mindsets about people in the LGBTQ community. OP needs to take all of those comments and throw them in the bin, never should have had to have answered questions that were asked or statements that were said by people who have a lack of critical thinking and want something to cry about. I'm sorry but THIS is why i've distanced myself from the community. Just like I've distanced myself from the feminist movement, too many extremists make the WHOLE culture and community about them and you end up walking on eggshells if you don't fit the mold of the "perfect gay person" or "perfect feminist" or hell even the "perfect ally". I'm sure someone will get mad at my wording but that would just prove my point.
Love this much calmer episode. Lose the loud guy please and I’d definitely catch every ep
Toxic redditors jumping to conclusions?? That’s so wild!
Maybe I watch too much true crime but am I the only one who thinks the dad and his side piece may have had something to do with the mom’s death????
My mother (my dad agreed with her) would force me into a dress/skirt all the time, especially if I had to go to church. Because "you have to look presentable to god" I hated it, love trousers and I'm not lesbian (I think) just hate skirts and wear them a few times a year, when I "dress up".
The 1st story hit me hard. My father passed away in Nov 2021. May of 2022, on my parent's 39th wedding anniversary, she met a guy. Sep 2022, 4 months after meeting, AT MY AUNTS WEDDING, he proposed to her. May 2023, a year and 6 months after her husband of 38 and a half years passed away, 3 days before their anniversary, and married him. They attempted to plan a big wedding, but no one RSVP. They also had the same honeymoon as my parents.
Here's the thing, to take a break in a relationship it has to be discussed before hand and mutually agreed upon, with clearly defined boundaries about what is and is not acceptable during said break, and have both parties consent. If not then you are just ending the relationship. She clearly just wanted to go have sex with a bunch of people on her trip and decided if I tell him we are on a break then he can't be mad at me for cheating. Any decision in a relationship, that effects the relationship (ie: breaks, physical intimacy, combining finances, major purchases with combined finances, moving, allowing someone else to live with you and so many more) has to have consent from both parties or the relationship should not exist in the first place. The only exception to that is ending the relationship, that one person's can decide on their own. She decided unilaterally that they were going to be on a break so she could go cheat for 6 weeks, told him in the literal last minute she was seeing him for the 6 weeks then blocked him, SHE ended that relationship then boarded a plane to go sleep her way around Europe with her college friends.
36:15 I agree Riley. A “break” is a breakup because obviously something isn’t working in the relationship and in a normal relationship (not this one) the relationship needs to end and if the two people get back together that’s a new relationship and it doesn’t happen for a while. “Breaks” are a breakup lite. I don’t understand the ‘rules’ and am not gonna sit in limbo I’d rather heal with closure. I think needing space is healthy but a break is a breakup.
my Dad started dating his longtime coworker, only a couple months after my mom died. My sister was highly upset that he moved on so fast. i wasn't.
Our case was a little different. My mom had been sick for 10 years. She told my dad to remarry and "be happy." Specifically, she wanted him to marry her best friend (who hadn't had a relationship since her fiance passed away in her 20s).
The best friend was not interested 😂😂😂😂 but they did remain friends.
My dad and i spent years taking care of my mom. Not only did he have her blessing to move on, but my dad and i suddenly had all these blocks of free time which were just empty.
When you have all day, every day to sit and grieve an event that was honestly not very surprising (although still depressing and traumatic)... you can process it very quickly.
We didn't clean out her things for 3 years. But my dad hadn't gotten laid for many years before my mom left. i was not even a little bit salty for him going to get some expeditiously 🥴🥴
To be clear about the wedding dress: it is totally possible to make the bodice and skirt separates while maintaining the integrity of the dress so that it can still be worn as such. There are a few designs where it is more difficult to do so, but unless it is a very unusual style of dress it shouldn’t be a problem. It isn’t as significant of a change as OP seems to think it is
I clicked because of the title. My dad was already talking to his next wife while my mom was sick, and just 6 months after she passed, they got engaged. 1 year and 2 months after my mom passed, they got married. Me and my brother were still relatively young- he didn't consider what was best for us at all. I was 8 going on 9 when my mom passed, and they wed a few weeks before I turned 10. My brother is 4 years older and was in 8th grade when he wed her. The lady hated kids and expected us to cater to her like we were the help. My dad ended up dying 4 years later, so I got to go live with my mom's sister ❤
I finally got what OP meant when he said he wants to see if Scottish food is really a dare. 🤦🏾♀️😭
My mother met my stepfather a couple months after his wife of around 20 years died and they married a few months later, and their relationship is a very good one and I'm very happy for them. (He's very good to her, which I was concerned about because my father was not.) That being said, generally I do believe people might want to consider waiting before looking for someone, especially with a relationship that had lasted for a long time.
The story about the dress reminds me of that one movie, "27 dresses" where the younger sister completely cuts up the deceased mothers dress. Some people just are not as emotionally invested when it comes to objects. It happens. Just two people, With different view points when it comes to the significance of material possessions
7:00 in Mexico this happened with a 2 famous people a couple of decades ago. There was this young actress that was married to her 2nd husband. She had a girl from a previous marriage with another famous actor, and a baby with her current husband. One day pulling off from a parking spot she saw through the review mirrior two arm thugs that robbed them. She had a heart attack right there and passed away, she was inher thirties. She was a beloved artist her whole family was in the show biz and well known. It was so sad to see them all grieving for her. Not even a month after we all found out her widow married a famous singer. Of course they were attacked by everyone. Over the years it got lighter but nobody forgot or felt sorry when they said they felt bad for being attacked for getting married so soon after his wife's death, and claimed there was nothing previously between them. But even if they weren't, it was still not ok.
Is there a maximum limit for how many months you have to wait before dating after your other half dies?? My hubby is alive so it is not really applicable, but we are married for almost 29 years and we are together for almost 36,5 years... Not sure I would want to get in to another relationship if I lost my hubby, but I think there should be a maximum to Sam's rule.
OKOP FAN FROM DESTIN RIGHT HERE!
31:14 the updates are really killing the homophobia allegations. OP obviously loves her daughter so much!
42:30 I think the brain trust was her friend group. Like, I think they hyped her up about how this fight would go and when OP didn’t follow that script, she had to go back to her friends and regroup.
The brain trust means OP’s GF went to the ladies room to call her girls to get a good defense on his switch of tactics. He’s saying obviously they couldn’t come up w/a thing. Go, Kappa Alpha Theta
The brain trust = the group of her friends who may be helping her figure out how to respond or act in this situation. A brain trust is just a group of minds who come together to brainstorm, discuss, ideate.
Anyone who tries to blame the kid for the parent neglecting the child.
Please remember the child is a product of the parent. It's a child is not behaving or acting out in any way there is a high possibility that it is the parent's fault.
So the child is grieving the loss of her mother and she is acting out as brat that is what you need to be a parent and step in and help console your child and at least hold her hand through the grieving process since they are too young to experience this type of grief.
It doesn't matter what the child did or why. The parent is responsible and the fact the parent was neglectful when they needed to be there is not child's fault.
I absolutely think he is in mourning and is love bombed. I am so so sorry I hope he will heal and won't be hurt from this situation.
I feel like a year is almost a minimum engagement length, if you are trying to plan a formal wedding...so much that needs planned and scheduled ahead.
I think the damn rad fams need to shut the hell up over this dress, I literally grew up with a sister who went through a lot of these things, because these people clearly are not thinking they do not understand how cruel people can be to a child just because they're different, I'm glad my mom waited till my sister was strong enough to defend herself before letting her cut her hair and dress mascuine because I don't even want to know how those assholes at family events would have made her feel when she was too young to defend herself. They don't know s*** if they're saying that the mom was wrong for trying to protect her daughter for as long as she could before allowing her daughter to blossom into who they were, when she knew they were strong enoygh to stand the push back.
And on the topic of the dress, ITS HER DRESS, Op can do whatever the hells she wants with it! I wouldn't want a significant dress to me having the skirt taken off of it either! It just doesn't make sense to significantly alter a dress that belonged to her mother when it doesn't fit her style already, if she wants a connection to her father it would make far more sense if she took something from her father's old wardrobe to incorporate into the suit she wants to wear for her wedding. I'm sick of people trying to make people like this mother seem like they're homophobic simply because they have boundaries with THEIR OWN STUFF. This woman loves and supports her daughter these people need to shut up.
She definitely used that break as a hall pass
Hell no! That fiance doesn't OWE her sh*t!
On the topic of long engagements: my fiance and I have been engaged since the beginning of COVID. We are both transmasc, don't want our dead names on our marriage license, and keep having financial crises that prevent the $3-700 fees for two name changes. I guess I think there should be a good reason to wait, because if we had our names already, we'd probably be married by now.
In the first story op when being shutdown by her dad,
by saying she's too young,
she should have said "well if you're gonna shut me up now I am glad to not go to your wedding"
then walk out
sorry if it's been asked/answered, but what is with Sophia's star sticker? Is it a pimple patch?
Yes, it's a patch
Story 1: stinky man trying to justify his stinkiness; father is the AH
Story 2: I think we read this one before 🤔🤔and while Op is not 100% the AH in this story, but her kid is asking for a piece of her parent(s) on her person. The homophobic comments were people REALLY jumping to conclusions
Story 3: asking for a break at fiancé level is unhinged!!
The brain trust is all her friends that she went on the trip with
On the last story basically she was like I'm nervous about the engagement I need a few weeks getting ran through with my collage friends in Italy 🇮🇹 😅
Owes her is a wild take. He doesn’t owe her anything. She ghosted him for 6 weeks….
Now I'm curious what kind of infection she got, it's interesting that she got sick AFTER they started spending time together. As a true crime junkie, this scenario is SO much more common than anyone could imagine. JS
i low key love this mom. i hope things worked out but the realization that the mom saw her daughter's kid self as the her real self & that was holding her back is 👌🏿💪🏿
28:30 Sophia says the mother's fears were not important & I hard disagree. I want to remind anyone who sees this that it's still dangerous to be gay/trans/etc. violence still happens & some are murdered.
to me, it's like a black mom telling her son to be mindful of his size and skin tone & others responding with it doesn't matter what people think. granted one has a bit of choice as far as what you do & no matter what I do, people will see me as a big black man.
the mom wasn't an ahole & I agree letting the daughter express herself but that doesn't mean the mother's fears weren't warranted.
Wait... If she wants to wear a suit, why not have her father's suit from his wedding?
I think it said that the father was buried in his wedding suit.
So sorry and send big 🤗
I'm from around Destin! I love the beaches
35:04 what if you’re trying to save for the perfect wedding?
I disagree with Sofia in the ex fiancée story. She blocked him and left for weeks asking for a break just to be single and do what she wanted on the trip. He does not owe her anything, no conversation, nothing. He gave her the opportunity of a conversation to get the ring back, she didn’t even deserve that.
The purpose of getting engaged is to have time to plan your wedding.
No he wants proof so everybody can see exactly how she is so she can't twist it and make it seem like it's all his fault
I can’t help but think wtf was that woman thinking going into that house 2 weeks after he lost his wife?!! Such a heartless C U Next Tuesday
Man even the victorians grieved longer than two weeks (the men 'only' mourned for 6 months, women for up to 2 years) - in a society where widowers got to quit 'early' compared to widows they still would find 2 weeks immoral
The six weeks break story-She definitely took a cheat break and already planned to meet someone on the trip.
I hate that people get called homophobic for not doing what someone who happens to be gay wants
Omg imagine calling someone homophobic for NOT wanting the skirt of YOUR WEDDING DRESS to be chopped off…
The second story, the mom is not homophobic. How we all grew up is different. She never forced her daughter. She just loved her dress which is normal especially that her husband is gone. This was wrong of people to attack her for.
Dad in first story: He genuinely sounds like a narcissist
I'm in a long engagement because we fell on a hard financial situation shortly after we got engaged, but we're saving together to make it happen next spring.
Don't let anyone deny you roasted marshmallows.
40:50 my sons birthday is august 10th so that was just weird to hear 😭😂
Jobs never give you enough time off for bereavement. The state of GA gave me 3 days when an immediate family died. Years before when my dad died my job in a sewing factory gave me 2 weeks. Both are too short but the 3 days the state allowed is ridiculous.
36:16 that girl wanted to cheat, and say "WE WERE ON A BREAK" ( Friends style)🤣🤣🤣
47:35 she made it sound she was going to a third world country with no cellphone reception. It's fricking Europe
7:11 Just came here to say this! You guys!!!!!! I saw that. I clocked that. I know😂😂😂 I knew it, I know it. 😊😊. Who else sees it?? Don’t say what I’m talking about just say if you know it too 😉 I’ve been saying it. I know some others have noticed as well.
Thank you! 🙌🏻😅🤞🥰
27:58 I feel like there are FAR too many redditters wanting to call her homophobic and it’s CLEARLY because she wants to keep her meaningful wedding dress as close to in take as possible. SHES NOT THE ASSHOLE TO WANT TO SAVE HER WEDDING DRESS AS A FUCKING DRESS!! I would offer my daughter my wedding dress but about 6 months ago it was unfortunately lost in a fire. We lost a lot of meaningful and devastating important sentimental family heirlooms.
I'm so sorry for all that was taken from you by that fire! 😢💔
@amybellamy5130 Thank you so much I really appreciate that. I'm definitely looking into fireproof safes but I wish it's something I had before hand. I would never of been able to save everything but I would have been able to save alot more than the small handful of items that were thankfully at my siblings houses.
@Raraking4796 I can only imagine. My heart breaks just thinking of what you must be feeling! I hope you're able to find ways to easily replace anything that can be replaced.
This may seem silly or dumb (it's something I would do, so yeah... I guess that checks out 🤭), but for the things you aren't able to physically replace, maybe take some time to write a little tribute to those things - what they meant to you/reminded you of, how you'll remember them, and maybe what you learned from losing them & how that will help you going forward to make sure your futures treasures are kept safe?
I don't mean to be bossy - I'm just a big weirdo and silly shit makes life a little easier, at least in the world as I know it!
🖤
First story, dad never grieved his wife I refuse to believe he did
Second story, op is not being homophobic, it’s obvious she doesn’t wanna make crazy changes to her dress especially the dress she married her late husband in. And she even offered it for her daughter’s fiancé (how is that homophobic) obviously it didn’t happen because of the crazy alterations that would need to be made but she tried to have it included and it just didn’t work out. She’s trying
I am gobsmacked with the dad.
I’m confused why the op is being labeled “homophobic” for saying it was difficult to dress her daughter, her verbiage was not “I had to force her to wear dresses” so we don’t know what difficulty consists of.
I personally was difficult to dress for basic events, and I don’t identify as anything other than my birth certificate but dislike clothing not conducive to nap time 😂
Without context it says more about the event than them or myself IMO
Some things aren’t complicated and should be left at face value.
While I don't think the mom is homophobic, or that She should feel pressured to let her daughter use the dress etc. I do think she could have won some points with her daughter had she suggested they go suit shopping instead of dress shopping. I feel like I would understandably be frustrated as the mother, feeling torn etc. However as the daughter I would also feel like I wasn't being listened to/understood if after not only telling my mother I wanted to wear a suit for my wedding, but that I wanted to turn her dress int a suit and she suggested we could go dress shopping. The story turned out sweet though.
Lady blocking her fiancé while in Italy: He doesn’t owe her anything. She BLOCKED him, if she wanted to talk, she could have talked to him then. She’s made her choice now lie in bed.. or whatever that saying is.
So i only watched for 20 minutes,so if you said this after that i apologize, but am i the only one thinking he killed his wife?!
41:08 it’s weird but she clearly wanted to sleep with other guys on this trip for sure! That’s why her fiancé was blocked on everything.