Americans Are Paying Their GROWN Children's Bills! ($1,400 a month!)
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- Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024
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My parents were unable to pay for my college but they were able to allow me to live with them rent free while I achieved both my Bachelors and Masters Degrees. This allowed me to graduate debt free and this gave me a serious leg up in the world. I did not move out of my parents’ house until I was 27. However, my parents gave me such a blessing by allowing me to stay with them and save money while I was in school. I love my parents so much ❤️
I usually agree with Dave, but I think what your parents did is what parents in many countries do to help their children be safe and save up to own a home and start their own family. It is definitely NOT enabling. It is setting you up for financial and familial success.
Are you giving anything back tho???
He’s not talking about that he agrees with your statement he’s talking about parents paying millennials houses when they live in a different house when paying for them why they should be working that’s not the same thing you still learned respected and savings and responsibility
I don't think your situation is what Dave is talking about, you were actively working towards something. He's talking about parents paying their kids bills that have the ability to pay their own. This is especially harmful when their kids have addiction issues. You see that a lot.
This is awesome, I want to do the same for my children, no student loan debt for them is my desire. Just because your 18 don’t mean your ready to leave home. I believe there is a way to help without enabling and or kicking them out before there ready to live on their own. God Bless your parents.
I worked with a 47 yr old man whose mother paid his bills and gave him a new car and a free home to live in. His pay check was all fun money. He had the nerve to shame people for struggling to pay their bills
Is that for real!!!!!!! 47 years old !!!!!!!!
His mother is a part of the trouble
Sounds like she didn't want him living in her house, & couldn't get him out any other way.
So mum was playing the hero. Son was playing her and getting whatever he wanted. See a pattern here.
Watch him line up at the food bank when mom cuts his narcissistic @$$ off.
I'm so glad i grew up in poverty listening to Dave as a teen.
Now i live life like no others and am very happy with my debt free life.
If u are glad to grow up in poverty why are u not in poverty now?
Debt free means nothing
How much u make matters
@@johndone8045some of the highest paid people are poor. Doesn't matter what you make.
When I was 14, I went every Saturday and did yardwork on 4 different people's yards. I would mow the yard, edge the walkway, driveway, and gutters, then blow everything off. I used a PUSH mower and hand held blower and I walked to all these yards. I started at 8am and was done by noon. I charged $40 a yard and gave my dad $5 a yard since I was using his hardware and gas. I did this one summer (June-August) and had $850 in my account. Spent $250 on new school clothes and my first pair of name brand shoes (Nike Air Force Ones)!
I could barely get my parents to pay for anything as a child…More or less as an adult. I’m 37 and my husband and I have no help and make it work. That’s life. No handouts no family, just us raising our girls the best we can.
sounds like my life. I'm doing pretty well now, but most people consider me very frugal.
exactly as it should be! those folks getting nearly everything paid for are in for an eventual rude awakening.
I've known a few people that have paid their adult kids bills through their kids 40s and 50s. It is just crazy to think that the adult kids are not embarrassed about this.
Kids are parents way of achieving immortality after passing away.
My parents are still paying my younger brother's bills. He's 49.
I know a 65 year old that’s living off an 88 year old. It never ends
My wife’s parents still pay her cell phone bill, and she’s almost 40. I find it really ridiculous to be quite honest, as when my kids hit 18 or out of college, they’ll have to pay their own cell phone bills.
My wife and I were raised very different. My folks retired at 59 years old and her parents are in their 70s and retirement is not an option. He parents made just as much if not more money way then my parents, and both her parents have college and my parents had no higher education. My folks lived below their means, her parents live above their means. I am on track to retire when I’m around 60, my wife is 12 years younger than me, and she will retire with me, and she will only be 48. We live like my parents did. We still have nice stuff and going all inclusive an actions, but that’s all generated from passive income, as we are wise with what we do with our money.
Yeah, they’re pathetic!
I bought my first house at 27, it was a fixer. I lived in my parents basement for about two years while I made the house livable. Had to do it myself(with Dads help) as I certainly couldn't afford to pay anybody to fix it. I haven't had to pay rent since I was 24 and being able to not pay rent while literally building equity into my house was a game changer for me. Almost 20 years later and it's a nice little rental property for me.
My sister is a CPA and she says this is common. Lots of young adults spend too much on useless things, then expect mom or dad to help. Most know how much or imagine how much they will "get as an inheritance" and think they should have it now. They think somehow mom and dad will survive. Once a parent dies, they want the surviving parent to move into an apartment or nursing home and let them have it all. Moms are the biggest problem, wanting to protect their especially adult sons from real life. If dad interferes he will have to live with a wife who is angry and a "Karen".
They weren't taught the implications of the story of the prodigal son
It's one thing to help while going through college or during an emergency like a health issue, a layoff or divorce, etc. But to pay bills EVERY month! That is sabotaging your child's ability to learn, thrive, and survive in this world!
Yea, my mom took my sister back during a divorce but she wanted to leave after a few months. Saved for a year and got a place. Took some adjusting.
I agree Dave.!!! I have a 24 year old that gets up every morning & comes to work with his parents & paints cars all day. He hates when people say "this next generation is lazy". He is far from lazy as he has some 14- 16 hour days painting. BUT- the difference is he was raised like his parents were with the mindset- If you want something- work for it!
I agree my son is 25. He works a 3 rd shift in a lab as a scientist. He is so hardworking. So proud
@@katemiller7874 Good job Momma!!! 😊
My mom complains about people these days not wanting to work and how I shouldn't complain about my job or look for another position. I am of course the same person who worked three jobs at one point to keep a roof over your head and she has refused to work for the past 20 years always coming up with some excuse or another or looking for some kind of way to get others to pay her bills.
@@littlesongbird1 Unfortunately it is even in the older generation & I'm sorry you are going thru this with your mom. But I am rooting for you girl- to make a fabulous life for yourself, you are the exception to the rule "taught by what they see". You go girl!!! 👏👏👏
@@Chele-nm4qx Thank you. sorry for venting like that but but yeah I hate to say it but the older I get the more I am glad I am not like her.
There is no labor crisis. The labor is no longer valued. THAT’S the crisis.
💯
Employers only expect you to stay on the job until you find one that pays better. And they’re tired of having to fill in for Mom and Dad during your “working” hours. No, you may not go barefooted in the office. No, you may not bring your blanket to work. Actual irl management issues, btw.
There's a labor crisis, wage crisis and inflation crisis. All of this plays a part
No, there is not. There is a lazy and entitled crisis.
@@joypeaceandhappiness1501
There is not a wage crisis. There is a crisis of not knowing how to live within our means.
My parents didn't get air conditioning in their house until 12 years ago, years after we had all graduated college. That was one way to ensure all three children moved out quickly! 😂
We never had air conditioning all my life! :D
Haha, "way to ensure all three children moved out quickly!" Love it.
Lol
Definitely!
🤣😂
I’m in the middle. My daughter worked part time when she was 15 and 16 years old. But at 17 and 18 years old school was to much. So we told her to focus on school. She graduated in the top 10 in her class . She got accepted to the university she wanted to go. She only works in the summer now and helps me out on her Christmas break. She ended up getting a full scholarship.
How is that “being in the middle”? Your daughter is gifted, works hard, and is doing everything right.
@@genxx2724 I think most ppl say that kids should work thru college, but we didn’t let her during the school year.
@@rodrigocortes3641 It depends on their major. Some majors require too much time studying.
@@rodrigocortes3641 Yes but she got a full scholarship so I would assume that her on campus expenses during the school year were low so she could afford to just work the summers.
If you are an adult, you should pay your own bills. If you are a married adult, you should pay your own bills. If you are an adult with children, you should pay your own bills. Yes, even if your parents are able and willing to help, pay your own bills.
Thankyou! Where’s the sense of dignity.
Yes!! Then when your parents get older, you help them.
Na
Amen!
If they have more than enough and will pass on leaving $ behind, YES take it....but take it and INVEST it!
We made a rule in our house when my daughter was little. "If you throw a fit you automatically don't get what you want."
The other rule is the word "Deserve" is not uttered in our house. Nobody "Deserves" anything that word exudes entitlement.
If you haven't EARNED it then it's not yours.
I'll help set my daughter up for success but once she is out in the world and we turn her loose she gets to sink or swim.
Hopefully we taught her enough different strokes to get where she needs to go.
That’s a good upbringing. Mine was the same. But I think a hard-line “sink or swim” policy may be too draconian.
@@genxx2724 In real life it's sink or swim. If you don't prepare your children for it, they will sink.
Don’t get mad if your daughter ends up doing onlyfans to meet financial needs. It’s not easy as it used to be. Maybe help her get settled with a real job then let her sink and swim.
Some parents are at the age where they need taking care of, some cultures live several generations in the same yard. Some parents have medical issues, some adults living with parents finish school without huge student loans as their foundation - not all adults living with their parents are leeches and lazy😢
Yeah.
It definitely depends on the actions of the kids.
Are they drinking all the time, or buying drugs?
Kick them out.
Are they working or in college? I see nothing wrong supporting them.
Case by case basis.
If they are working and not going to college, they should pay rent/utilities. Obviously, there are exceptions.
I’m sure he’s not talking about those types
Exactly. My adult son.has mild autism and lives with me. Dave and his holier then thou mentality can take a hike.
Once I got a full time job at 20 years old (after getting my Associates Degree), my sister & I paid my parents bills to give them a break! I am now 62 & retired.
Well you lived back when things were affordable and pay was reasonable compared to the cost of living. Its a different world now.
"Doesn't know what Duty is and doesn't answer the Call" 😂
Family called us "Drill Sargents" because we made our kids get up and do weekend chores on Saturday mornings. Cut the grass, edge the lawn, cut the bushes, etc. Now our oldest is a college graduate with his own apartment, a retirement plan, and an emergency fund. Their kids can't keep a job but somehow can play the game all day.
Anecdotally, my aunt and uncle were like you. My parents were really relaxed with me. I’m now the kid with the good job and good finances while my aunt’s kids are both deadbeats. They didn’t learn how to do anything not dictated by mom and dad.
the horror!😁
You did it right. Good parents
@@willmichael4033same here. Had a pretty lax life, occasional BS from my dad, but still grew up to do well for myself. Then again, my other siblings didn't turn out as well, so it's a gamble.
Some parents believe in the phrase “I want to give my kids the things I never had”. I think that mindset leads parents to providing too much and not allowing their kids to “figure things out” on their own.
Sometimes what kids needs is a reality check. Sometimes getting in a screaming match with room mate over roomie refusing to figure out how to load start and unload dishwasher is the best teacher of all
You nailed it
They definitely over correct
Yup
@Planet of the Idiots So do you feel that way about all families who work in a family business? If so, I just think that's kind of weird thinking on your part.
I'm a millennial and couldn't agree more. Some of my peers who are also parents look at me like I'm a monster when I say I'm okay with my kids failing. Character building and habit training take effort.
And they won’t fail because of you♥
Why have children then?
Because you want to have another life who grows up as an actual human being. Not a child that never learns independence and personal sovereignty.
@@re_flow you shouldn’t be having children if you’re not willing to take responsibility for the life you created. The children didn’t ask to be born.
Are you ok if they are homeless? Have you seen rent prices?
This generation has suffered two recessions, pandemic, mass layoffs, an astonishing rise in higher education, a never ending war. Currentlycars prices are ridiculous, housing is out of control, prices driving up in big part to what’s coined as greedflation. But yes, the problem is we don’t know hard work! Should have known! For the first time in our history we’re economically worse off than our past generation but it’s the work ethic guys.
It is. Do you realize the people before us lived through a depression? How about 18% inflation rates when I was a kid? Gas being rationed at the pumps. People went and got 2nd and 3rd jobs to make ends meet and learned to say NO to spending on stuff they didn’t need. Today, immediate gratification rules the day, lots of people act like work is supposed to be a minimal part of our day, and they “deserve” whatever they want.
@@TK-431 and those 18% mortgages were on $45k homes.
It’s VERY expensive trying to break into adulthood now, while “I got mine” boomers are sitting on half a million in home equity and colllege degrees didn’t cost a hundred grand.
College costs have greatly outpaced inflation as have child rearing costs, housing, etc so maybe it’s worth cutting young adults a break.
And yet EVERYONE else went through this also. It's called life.
@@TK-431 That's exactly correct. It's always wise not to saddle oneself with debt for a degree that doesn't even guarantee a decent-paying stable job. A vocational degree while living well below one's means is far better.
Stop whining. Just stop. Stop victimizing yourself and disgracing our generation.
I literally never asked my mom for money after I got a job in the 9th grade…I am 42 years old now…I feel so liberated that I learned how to manage money no matter the amount…not saying that I didn’t struggled but I never asked anyone for anything…
Neither did I. Never got a leg up from anyone.
Its almost impossible to find someone willing to hire a 9th grader. Its almost impossible even for a 15 year old to drive to work now, not to mention it takes 100% or more of a teens paycheck to pay for insurance and gas.
Excuses excuses
Same here but started at 16. Never asked for anything after that
I'm a millennial and I can't imagine my parents ever paying for anything for me. Even if they could, I wouldn't accept it. How will they retire if they spend their money on me? It's crazy
I left the nest at 16 yrs old. Joined the military at 19 yrs old. Never looked back... retired at 45 yrs old.
Me too! Except I was 17, and I plan on working until I am dead.
Multiple generations actually need to learn to live together
I know many people paying for their adult children and have almost nothing in retirement. Absolutely insane.
Unfortunately we gave one of our children over $50k and nothing changed. Panicked and learned the hard way to step back and consider the situation.
There's a fine line between helping and enabling.
The best lesson parents can teach their children is to survive on their own and have the knowledge to know they can.
Teach your kids how to fish and stop feeding fish
I got pocket money when I was 13. My parents made sure I had a side job when I was 14. Pocket money stopped the same week. That was end of the story of supporting me with free money.
Good
Be proud.
That doesnt exist any more. There is no one who will hire a 14 year old. Not too mention you cannot even drive until like junior or senior year now.
Maybe we need to start addressing housing affordability and why the price of housing has skyrocketed compared to the average income.
yep intrest rates up but salaries dont match
its very simple. idiots are willing to pay the banks the amount of these inflated housing prices. If people stop buying, the prices will come down...watch!
Housing supply and demand. Plus they don’t build started homes anymore. I see developments building $350-$400k houses but there needs be be more $250k houses.
@@jacobmonti453 100%. The issue is the supply has been severely constrained due to regulations around where and what you can build. A lot of these regulations are supported and lobbied by existing homeowners who want to keep their property values sky high.
BULL...no wonder our society SUCKS! good grief!
I’m in my late 20s and live with my parents but I have no shame because during this time I earns my bachelors in applied math debt free and also now work as a remote developer and I saved like 80-90 percent of my take home pay because my parents let me live with them. I am beyond grateful and I wouldn’t have been able to do it if it wasn’t for their help. It’s not always the case that adults who live with parents are lazy. I think we all just do the best with what we are given.
Living with your parents is fine! Don’t believe the ridicilous American/western culture. It’s very normal to stay with your family if you are unmarried. Doesn’t make you lazy or less responsible. Some of the best people in this country live like that (Asians, Indians, middle eastern, Nigerians). My kids will stay with us till marriage as my husband and I did. All I do expect of them is to be hard workers
@@alqoshgirl I can understand how it can be dangerous because if parents are enabling you then you can very easily slip into unhealthy habit but also it can be a great asset if you can use the opportunity to upskill yourself in terms of career, education, finance and health
Agreed! I got my own house because my place of work was too far from my parents' to continue commuting with my 80 hour weeks. But if that were still an option, I 100% would still live with them and set myself up for a better future. Faster than I currently am. It's a blessing, and I am glad you are able to recognize it as such
Just curious, how's your dating life?
@@28goldenboy, that’s the thing. A grown woman with goals and responsibilities of her own, my not give someone that still lives with their parents the time of day. It really depends on the individual and what they’re currently doing with their living situation and future aspirations.
Lol doesn’t know duty and can’t answer a call, that line was hilarious Dave 😂
My mom would never do such a thing , you can get help with a phone bill maybe, but 1400 a month ! thats crazy
We did not spoil our kids. Each is now a hard-working, law-abiding adult.
I grew up with my mom and even into my adulthood of twenties and thirties of living with my mom, but I always strove for paying half of everything. Half the rent, half the utilities, and my own bus pass. Every now and then, I remember watching those daytime talk shows where adult children would live with their parents but rely on their parents to cover everything. These were fully grown, perfectly capable adult children living off of mom and dad.I thought that was disgusting back then and vowed to never be that person. I still think that's disgusting.
You lived with an elderly woman well into your 20s and 30s. Shame on you.
@@karlabritfeld7104 She wasn't elderly at all. She died at the age of 58. and we were financial roommates. Don't judge.
@@karlabritfeld7104
I cant tell if this is sarcastic or not, I honestly hope not.
@@karlabritfeld7104 I know right? Elderly people belong in nursing homes not in your home
So. Much THis.
Well I’m a millennial who has never had a parental hand out and has worked incredibly hard, graduated from university into a recession and now starting a family in a time of inflation and insane costs of living. So it’s not all of us!
Good for you! You can join the club.
Where is this? Can I have my bills paid by my parents 😂
I just sent this to my dad and told him to get with the program 😂😂😂
@@Cupcake813x, I wouldn’t blocked you for sending that to me if I was your dad. Jk! 🤦🏾♂️🤣
Some people pay their kids bills other pay their kids salary
I just mentioned this. He has no room to speak
grod805, It would be different if his kid didn't work for the money though. He was talking about parents that just give their kids money without the kids having to do anything for it.
First job I had was de-tasseling corn, at age 14. Parents helped me get it and it was BRUTAL. Learned to work with my brain and not with my back. Lesson learned.
If you have detasseled corn, you have done real work. The only thing I can compare it to is shingling roofs in the hot sun.
De-tasseled corn starting at age 12 through college years in Indiana. That became my spending money to get me through the year. Eventually led to foreman position in the fields and finally to contracting seasonally with Pioneer Seed Company. Big money. Real Fast. Ten summers or more in all. Those were the days....
@@brucehamm6197 Purdue?
Thanks for the part on "not all of them". Absolutely drives me crazy when boomers talk about millennials in general. I work hard.
I'm sure you do but your generation has the largest proportion of useless people. Your generation was the first one where victimology took over en masse.
Many millennials work hard and they are not the ones to blame if they are living off their parents. Boomers are.
I agree. My friends/coworkers and I work crazy hard at our engineering firm. I'm the oldest on my team at 35. Most of my staff are Gen Z and Younger Millennials.
I don't like that Dave got suckered into this argument though. It's objectively more expensive to live now.
I'm living debt free, don't even have a mortgage on my house. However, life is truly more expensive than what my parents went through.
@@e79422 All generations are to blame.
Good for you but we were raised alot different and I’m so glad.
Dave handed his daughter a high-paying job as soon as she finished her "communications" degree. That IS PAYING HER BILLS!!!
Not really. He makes is daughter WORK!
He does, he knew what she could do or not do and he gave them all jobs. They never worked. His other daughter is off the air but really, it's silly. Rachel is well off, her husband is making good money, Dave gives everyone a good salary, he said they get the same as the hosts. The grandbabies get spoiled rotten. He is not comparing apples to apples.
@@amireallythatgrumpy6508 I think she's fine, as long as she brings in $$, people like her and she still can be home at a reasonable time, she's happy.
I work overtime at my job, attend school full-time and I still struggle without my family's help. It's extremely difficult to own a home for example and still pay other bills off of just retail/food service wages. My family helps me when they can and I attend school to eventually stand on my own and maybe even help my younger family members.
Good job.. Dave Ramsey helps his own kids so he shouldn't be preaching this.
Your family helps you? You first said you're doing all this without your family's help. Which is it?
Something I see with young adults these days is they don’t think about getting roommates.
My husband and I got married young and we needed roommates for the first few years of our marriage.
@@cindys.6154
Dave Ramsey doesn’t pay his kids bills. He also worked with them to teach them how to save for big purchases as kids.
@@karlabritfeld7104 Occasionally, my family can't help me. I struggle in those times to make ends meet. I also do have a roommate so that's not an issue. I haven't lived by myself ever. I also used to work seventy hour weeks at two different jobs but I wasn't enrolled in school at the time.
Perhaps parents who pay for their children’s expenses have two things going on: they feel guilty for the past, and they have no confidence in their children’s abilities.
Perhaps they didn’t prepare their children for the future and are now afraid to see them fail.
Or they want their children to save enough for a house payment. It's stupid to pay somebody else rent when you can pay your parents the similar amount or save that amount.
Or they want them to fail so they will remain dependent upon them.
Boy I wish my parents would pay $1400 of my bills 😂 that would be awesome
that would pay most of my mortgage😂
but my parents have the same problem as me...cant retire...only a few years ahead of me on a nortgage payment cause they had ro move for work too
I've been on my own since I was 19. I told my parents I wanted to figure it out and it's sweeter when you work through that struggle on your own.
This phenomenon is less about being lazy and more about enabling and the expectation that many kids must always have the best and newest stuff. They always fall back on the “participation trophies” and so on but much of this is this group wanting to always have the best- new cell phone, car, nicest house, etc.
Your so wrong it hurts.
Or life is getting way too expensive… no body can afford rent or homes anymore
I think you’re right. It’s a combination of enabling and entitlement.
I agree with this also, I think as soon as kids can truly be shown how much stuff cost the better. My son is 16 we gave him his first car, just like we said we would. But he has to pay the insurance, gas, and half of all major repairs. He works Wendy's part-time. He recently got a girlfriend and took her out on a date and came home and said well I didn't realize how much all this truly cost and I said welcome to adult life. The quicker they can see the value of a dollar the better off he will be.
@@troyspears6470 there is this as well. No one can deny it is tougher than it used to be get started in life.
My wife and I disagreed on this issue. I did not enable my kids financially. Our neighbors thought we were in economic hardship because our kids were asking them if they needed any jobs done for them. Today my sons make well over six figures and my younger daughter is headed in the same direction. They are all financially responsible and abhor debt. My wife now says I was right. I never had any doubt! Kids need to learn hard work.
Both my siblings live with my mom, there in their 30s, pay no bills.. it's disgusting.
The hypocrisy of Dave’s eagle leaving the nest story is quite hilarious
I’m gonna go out on a limb and say his kids all live a pretty nice lifestyle. They all work at Ramsey Solutions (including at least one of his son in law)
Now no offense to Rachel, but there’s no possible way she’s on the air or selling books without daddy
That’s all fine, they are good kids, but let’s not pretend they aren’t afforded privileges
Dave paid for all his kids college tuition as well
@@MrJimmy3459 It's part of his baby steps... parents save tuition on a 529 account...
@@MrJimmy3459 But they had to go where he said...very controlling.
@@scalas01 He didn't give them a choice, maybe not top students but he said one wanted to go a state away and he said no. He had millions by then, but just didn't want to do it. They didn't have to keep listening but money talks.
I do live with my parents because things are very expensive. I work full time. My parents do travel so they like that I'm here to take care of things while they are gone.
Excuses. No job crisis just contentment with not growing up
OK burden
@D L nope. Just saving up... you know like Dave recommends to have your emergency fund in place...
Wow and you admit that? Lol
@Dreamer wow I guess you can't read?
Some young adults are paying their parents bills or parents are living with their children.
This Goes both ways.
If parents pay adult kids 1400 a month the kids are robbing their parents retirement. Yeah the parents will have to live with their kids when they are retired
Exactly
My dad was a general contractor. If I got in trouble at school, I got to go to work for him the next day without pay. (If I refused, he'd show me the door).
I worked two jobs between 16 to 32.(either school and a job or two jobs when i was out of school.) I never took out a student loan. Only had a $3000 personal loan for a car (and no car payment since), and haven't rented since 2008, and I'm a Millennial.
Excellent
I can see guitar in the hands, easy chilling life dude :D you are rockstar
💯
Dave is lucky if his adult children don't need his help in this economic climate. I've worked since I was 15 and worked 50-80 hours a week since then. Even with that, with this recent historic inflation, my family and I have struggles. No participation trophies here!
He's just a typical boomer, crying how much harder he worked back in his day and downplaying the younger generations work.
I think it’s pathetic to have a parent pay their kids phone bill when they work full time but have money for “extra things” 🤮 grow up
I work in Insurance all you won’t believe how many 30 , 40, and even 50 yr old ppl STILL having mommy and daddy lay for their insurance
No way!! That makes me sick.
Yup, I saw it too when I worked in Insurance…
I’m a millennial parent. My kids don’t have to leave when they become adults, but they do have to start contributing like adults. Other countries stay together as a family not because they’re weak but because they’re just closer to each other. I want that. My sons will pay rent and utilities and buy groceries but they don’t have to leave if they will help.
That should lead to a really swell love life for them.
@@stormyweather2807 Motivation to find better paying work.
Amen! I’m with you. My kids were the same way. Four out of five succeeding on their own. The youngest at home (paying rent) and learning “to adult.”
@@stormyweather2807 It depends on how you look at it. On the one hand, if they realize living at home is lowering their prospects-which hopefully they will see because they will still have been expected to work and be adults-they will have the means and skills to break out on their own and fix it. No one will shame them for that. They are also welcome to leave. HOWEVER, in the long game, lots of people looking for a partner are not just looking for someone who can take care of themselves, but someone who’s already saved up wealth and made real life progress. A really smart kid could use living at home with it’s graces and likely lower financial expectations and use that time to build up savings and make investments in their future with more safety than they would otherwise have-THEN they can move out later on when they have a lot to offer. If they just stayed at home because they were scared and didn’t want to adult, then I’d agree with you. But if my kids pull that it’s the only reason they would get kicked out.
@@andianderson3017 wise perspective, im a young guy in 20s doing that, dont care if love life suffers temporarily so i can build wealth or some buffer and not live pay check to pay check right off the bat,lol . Traditional americans are so set on being independent right of the bat at 18 and suffer financially for no reason, but america is starting to see the benefit of families sticking together, a little longer at least, especially as times are getting harder economically.
Dave-with all respect with the cost of living crisis, student loans and low salaries during your first career years sometimes there is no other way to pay bills or manage in life without help. And is vice versa, when parents are old kids will help them.
as a bmx rider that has had head injuries, helmets did not make us whimps or worst riders. it has saved lifes (cranmer, banasiewicz) and protected brains. please dont advocate not helmet use FFS.
As a millennial, I can genuinely say that participation trophies are what ruined my generation. However, it was our Gen X and Boomer parents that insisted we get those stupid trophies to begin with…
Now what’s next? What kind of parents are we going to be?
I never post on RUclips but as a millenial who got participation trophies it did not have any psychological impact on me. Learning how to do hard things and learning how to fail AND recover from that failure is what many of us fail out. There are so many options that if we fail at something we don't try again. We move into something else or just give up. Trophies have nothing to do with it
Well Said I blame the parents and school system way before the children.
@@mattmadonna6102because when you failed at something meaningful, you didn't get your reward. Maybe those trophies did matter after all. 😂😂😂 bigger psychological impact than you thought...
As did their parents before them, as did their parents before them. Participation trophies date back to the 19th century
The guy who handed his kids jobs is telling people what to do. I think it all depends on the situation to be honest. These young people are expected to work hard, but not make enough to live. Then we yell at them for giving up. I would not work hard either if nobody is willing to pay me a living wage.
All 3 kids and grandkids have Papa Dave taking care of them. The live well, get good salaries, have to put up with a controlling dad but it's that or someone else's dad or mom being your boss. They do fine but didn't struggle, college paid for and Rachel talks of how he spoils them.
Wow! My parents would never have done that. If I wanted school clothes I worked to pay for them. College I paid for every one of my degrees. Nobody ever assisted me and I didn't expect it.
I pay my wife bills and after listening to this I now realize I am enabling her. It's now time to stop.
Lol 😀 😆
That’s your wife.
Kick her out
🤣🤣🤣
Be the change
OR
Be homeless
My parents taught me about work ethic by example. I started working at 16 making $1.25 an hour. Yes, that shows I am that old. Now I am retired and no debt except my mortgage which will be paid off in about eight years or less. I agree with everything Dave says. No kids to support. No one to take care of me in my old age except me.
So you were born in 1947 and yet won't pay your mortgage off until 2031 when your 84 years old. Yet you want to criticize others for their choices and "work ethic"
So when you can no longer take care of yourself then what?
My understanding there a housing shortage with stater homes at 350k. The student loan debt average 30k. With jobs that only pay 50k on average. The math is still math.
Yup!
So you have to go to college? You have to take on that debt, without a plan? There's nothing out there you can do that will provide a quality of life for you that doesn't involve college?
@@conman823 No you don't have to go to college but if your job only 50k which is the average in America your not buying a house that starts at 350k. You can't afford it even with no debt. Even a apartment now is around 1500 you can't afford that either without roommates or living with other people.
@@2009Holleywood- apartments pushing $1700 or more
Cost of living for our generation is completely different and Dave didn’t look into this unfortunately
Stop making excuses
Because of a lack of supply/production from no one working…
He is talking about my ex-husband! My ex-husband whom is over the age of 40 is still living with Mommy! And then his sister and her husband have his father! I still don't understand that!! I totally agree with Dave!! My youngest daughter turned 18 and she moved out! I was worried about her but I don't know I think she should be fine!
@@tucoramirez9729 ur right it's an excuse, but working a $20 hour job is not gonna be enough to get by
that explains the housing, but I took pride in paying my own bills while living with parents, and it is easy without full rent overhead
Parents don't want kids to feel any pain or have any controversy....they forgot this is what makes people who they are. Most of the greatest human beings to ever walk the planet failed way more than they succeeded!!!!
Dave should look in the mirror, his kids live a very lavish lifestyle. I’m sure his daughter and husband really could afford their multi million dollar house on the merits of their own labor without daddy Dave
Failed way more than they succeeded! I didn’t know that.
@@MrSmokeyBrewster "just a small loan of a million dollars" energy
When I was in college my parents would only give me 200 a month for food and that was it. I had to pay for my own housing by getting jobs and by my second year I didn’t need their assistance. It felt good being able to walk into a grocery store and buy food with money I made.
The issue isn't living at home. The issue is that you live at home, but don't pull your weight. I am in my early 20's, make $50k/year, and am living at home right now. I pay for "rent", my own food, car insurance, phone, electric, and oil. I do my own chores and help around the house. Just under $1000/month. Living at home allows me to save half of my take-home pay, pay off debt, etc. I think this video talks about people who don't do 75% of what I just mentioned.
I agree. There is no way you can give someone $1400 a month unless they simply aren't paying ANYTHING. If they need that much then they need to live at home anyway because they cant afford to live on their own. If they are at home then they need to pay their way and contribute to the household domestically. It's mutually beneficial and everyone saves money! If they are doing this, then parents wouldn't need to give them $1400 a month. Parents are literally stifling their kids by not making them pay their own way and care for themselves domestically. All of it including doing their own laundry, yard work, cleaning or their area, cooking their own food they bought, paying utilites and portion of mortgage, their car expenses etc. Living with your parents as roommates helps people to see their parents as people and not as parents which is a very mature frame of mind. You sound like you are doing an excellent job of meeting your goals and you are working with your parents as a family moving forward in life! That is what family is for❤. Anyone say anything negative to you about it is jealous because you've got a great thing going and a loving family. There is no need to feel insecure about it at all.
All generations inherited their thoughts from previous generations!! I’m an 80s person, I don’t know where all these entitled, participation trophy kids are. Maybe because I grew up in a military household and lived in base housing, got my first job at Burger King at 15 making $4.25 an hour. Yeah there’s millions of people out here making terrible financial decisions. We all didn’t have parents who were financially savvy, good thing we all have access to this type of content! Very invaluable information, it’s helping me dig myself out from the hole I created!!
My boss complains about his kids all the time at work. Dude pays all their bills and they are losers, I mean I’m a loser too but I’m trying to get my education and try at least that counts for something
Lol
Dave "the only safe place is heaven" 😂 I love his no nonsense
I've actually seen more of parents taking from their kids, where the kids work their butts off, and the parents just take and take and guilt trip and take
I’ve seen it too but in the inner city
Both my husband and I had entitled parents…we owed them something…
The problem is that for your generation, if you worked hard, you got well rewarded. You work hard now and you don’t move forward
What you just said is horse manure. It's a limiting death belief.
The truth is..if you do not work hard now..face the pain of regret later. I can't stand hearing the phrase "Don't work too hard". That is the mindset of the lazy that would rather mooch off those that "earn" their living.
Find a sales job with uncapped commissions. Then opinions dont matter
Have to stop that kind of victim mentality, also what you just said isn't true.
Skill issue
I know some adult children who tell their parents you brought me into this world you can pay for me… unreal
Yeah well who raised them ? And who let them get away with that?
Reap what you sow
Definitely wasn’t me
I know if you were doctors children
Yep. Sad.
I would disown ungrateful adult children if my kids tell me that!!!!
I know a couple who pay the rent for their daughter while her boyfriend that she lives with is unemployed. The daughter works in a bar and goes to a different bar at lunch for alcoholic beverages. The daughter and her boyfriend spend all the money she makes on their habits.
They must be rich to pay two different rents!
Umm, part of the problem is telling kids that there is something higher to aim for than hard word or manual labor. The reason plumber, electricians, and masons can make as much as a doctor now is because there are so few people in those fields.
Idk if it's really balanced when only the top 10% of people in those fields can hit entry level doctor wages.
@@Excalibur2
1. Anyone who has been doing the same job for 20+ years should be at the top of their field.
2. Happy to trade off the balance of not having the stress and hours that a doctor has.
3. Doctors enter the work field with high debt loads. My husband has always built his business using cash. No college needed.
20 year-olds need to not be comparing themselves or their lifestyles to that of their parents (who have multiple decades of experience and work behind them.)
@@Excalibur2- exactly. I don't know why people keep saying thst plumbers are making six figures. Most of them simply are not.
@@ecclairmayo4153 yeah, it seems to be the story that's told about every manual labor job where people can freelance. I get it, some of them work 60 hour weeks and in the right market make bank, but the people I've known are not.
Plus, there's the added stress of basically running your own business: if you work for yourself then you have to handle marketing and customer support, collecting pay and everything else. It's work, it's stressful, and people really need to know what they're signing up for with typical wages instead of some number they may or may not get in 20 years.
After graduating college at 21 nearly 10 years ago, I was told to look for a job and an apartment. It felt harsh at the time but it gave me a significant advantage in my life and career despite having an average GPA. I feel like your independence in your early 20's is just as important as your college grades.
I've never worked a hard day in my life. Out of high school I refused to work in fast food or sack groceries. i'm 54 yrs old now thinking about retiring.
My daughters on a navy scholarship at med school. She pays all her own bills. But I do let her borrow the old Toyota.
That’s crazy, I didn’t want my parents to pay my bills, paid my cell bill once I got my first smartphone, paid own car insurance, etc…
Yup, I'm female, did it all on my own. I notice most of the freeloaders are men.
That's rich coming from the guy who paid for his children's college and gave them all 6-figure executive positions in his company.
It's only bad when others do it!
Came here to say exactly this, positions they are unqualified for as well.
@@Austenfan177 Proves my point.
He needs to shut his pompous mouth.
Exactly
@@Austenfan177 because he just made a video about not paying adult children bills and letting them know hardship. Yet his kids never knew struggle and he paid their education. It's hypocrisy
Dave I don’t think gets it. The cost of living compared to wages is the worst it’s ever been right now.
The irony of Dave admonishing parents for wanting their kids to be comfortable while giving his kids a several hundred million dollar business is incalculable.
Yet the Ramsey kool-aid drunkards will lap up what he's saying to no end...you can't make this up.
Have you heard the saying..."parents who provide their kids a comfortable place to fall back, have kids who fall back"....?
What makes you think hes giving then kids anything?
Why do men get grumpy as they get older?
Giving kids money and giving kids a company they have to run are not even closely related
there is no labor crisis, there is a livingwale wage crisis for sure 😂
This TikTok generation is not tough enough
Well to be fair, wages are lower and food and rent prices along with student loans are making it kinda hard to live on one's own without support as a 20-something.
A consequence of the student loan debt crisis and the pay from jobs not keeping up with the cost of living. Parents are going to do their best to protect theirs until these issues are addressed. It is what it is.
Thank you for having common sense. The average age that a kid stays at home in Europe is 25. I miss real communities. Family built and owned communities.
There are few jobs that keep up with 'the cost of living', and expectations generally. Millions of jobs are going to be made redundant in the next few years, partly due to AI, and this will reduce salaries even further. The only option is to adapt accordingly - there is no other choice. Sponging off parents is unacceptable. Once an adult, you are responsible for your own budget management. There are numerous other legal ways to supplement a salary, through hard work.
@@Lucienne-zz1sw Families are adapting, that's why parents are helping contribute to their children's bills. Anyway, using the word "adapt" or "hard work" is not a real strategy, those are buzz words. You can't adapt out of the cost of living, low salaries, and student loan debt. "Work harder" is not exactly a revolutionary idea. Have you ever considered that there are are those that are already working as hard as they can and still can't make ends meet? On top of that there are certain professions which bar you from working elsewhere or bar you from working over a certain amount of hours. Probably because they recognize the quality of ones work suffers if a person is overworked. Unless the real issues are addressed a lot of people are going to be relying on their families for help. Your view on what is acceptable or unacceptable is irrelevant to the facts of reality.
My daughter is 46. She was on her own and working for over 20 years. She had 2 strokes, and is waiting for SS disability. She's been living off savings and
occasionally watching the neighbors' cats. We did pay for car repairs once she was cleared to drive. She says she'll give us back money when she gets disability.
She has friends who have never supported themselves. Tina, Al's wife
Didn't Dave pay for his kid's college? Why does it matter what adults decide what they want to do with their money? They don't know what their kids are going through. They don't know if their kids can't get a job, has a disability, or is going through some sort of hardship. I wish Fox focused on actual news instead of shaming people for what they do in their personal life.
Here we go! But Dave!!!!
You dont understand! My mom and dad has to pay my bills while I find myself and find Tindr dates!
@@xandercruz900times are hard for a lot of ppl and I see nothing wrong with parents being parents
Ok how much do you get a month? 😂
@Xander Cruz 😂 omg roflmao if you did that with Dave I could imagine how swift of a kick he'd give ya.
@@xandercruz900 What happened to America being the land of the free? I imagine doing whatever you want with your money is included in that.
My husband is constantly giving his adult kids (30’s) money and it drives me crazy. He flips the script on me and tells me that I just don’t like his kids.
He really isn't helping them like this
Watch out. I have a husband exactly like that. His 44 yo son is now living life on us. He has never kept a job even for a year. Now he has to be a single stay at home dad of a 5 yo. His career choice. My husband pays his rent, utilities, cell phone, car insurance and food, while son does nothing! This has been going on for two years. I'm enraged. This is hurting our retirement and we are 70 yo and both of us have health issues. Beware! It will only get worse unless you stop it now.
Sometime parents do it to the kids, too…like we “owe” them. My husband and I both are products of parents that use their kids for financial gain for themselves…
I lived with my parents and helped them with bills up until I was 30. At 30, after saving my own money, bought my own property. Met my husband at 35, bought a house with him and got married at 37. We're expecting our 1st natural, healthy baby this year. I'm 38 now. My hisband and I both brought assets to the table when we met. I can't imagine dating/marrying a man who had his parents paying his bills.
Exactly! Congrats❤
I work at school and many of the kids are aggressive and destructive! They run down the halls screaming and cursing and have very little self control! They write vulger stuff on bathroom walls and recently started stealing from classrooms as they walk/run down the halls! Many have no self control and plenty of bad attitude! The kids and some of their parents have physically attacked the other kids and the teachers! No wonder teachers are quitting by the droves!
Lets not forget about all the school shootings... this is insane! Someone needs to be held accountable!
Blame the parents not the children
We didn’t need cell phones, cable tv, workout rooms in the complex… AC was a luxury. Starting out you’re going to need to start near the bottom and work hard to get ahead.
And when the parents pass on, those deadbeats will come after the responsible sibling expecting handouts from them.
My son is 12 and I wonder how he's gonna get his own place at 18+ when rent cost as much as a mortgage. Guess he can get roommates but still...
That will be for him to figure out. Not you. You will have to let him live life.
@@Dreamer-by4nk how old are you?
@@rein3684 old enough to be a divorced crazy cat lady.
Most likely wont...having roommates or staying in ones parent's house longer will be the norm for working class especially in high cost of living cities
Have 6-8 roommates or live at home till you can save up to buy a house. Those are the only two options to stay near my family.
Rich people pay the way for their kids all the time and give them a ton of money but it's only a problem when working class people do it. Ok.
Working class people are going into debt to do it.
Dave does it
Agree almost completely. I wouldn't be so flippant about how things were when I was young. My first car had no seat belts, but I paid for it. But, that was 50+ years ago. Today, I won't buy a car that isn't safe, particularly with the drug legalization in my State. Be careful not to discourage safety. Thanks
It's not the pot heads that are driving and causing accidents, it's all the drunks who have to go out to bars and drive home after.
Too bad they don't all smoke / drink at home.
Glad to have been raised by my grandparents and learned to work hard at a young age. I retired at 38 and haven’t asked for any help in 20 years. I treat my grandma to dinners and buy her stuff now.