Unhealthy Boundaries With The Ex
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- Опубликовано: 2 окт 2024
- Unhealthy Boundaries With The Ex
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In this episode Couples Academy practitioners discuss the topic Unhealthy Boundaries With The Ex
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Im a woman, and a friend of mine is completely obsessed with her child's father. He has moved on and married someone (they had never married), yet she still goes to his mother's house to eat dinners, spends each holiday with his family and not her own, and even tags along on their couple-vacations! All under the guise of "we are just mature and are all getting along for the kids". No ma'am. That is called obsession. I bet the wife isn't really cool with this, and is just too intimidated to set boundaries.
Plus, she claims she and the wife are close "friends". How? Why? There's a such thing as being cordial, but friends?? No, its unhealthy. That's her way to have a piece of him.😵💫
Couple's vacations omg 😮😮😮😮😮 no way. Too close.
I’m married 5 years ,we had many issues with the ex due to kids and control .His children live with us . Go to Mom weekends . They were arguing a lot because she didn’t like me involved . It finally felt like he was handling her better and then I found out accidentally that him and her were talking and texting several times a day for several months and not about the kids . He says he stopped but had to get caught to stop .It took me years to get him to have boundaries now he breaks them himself by hiding their communication with me . The reason they broke up is she left him for another man and left kids with him . Now the man dumped her .And she has been trying to destroy our marriage for years .But I blame my husband .Problem I have is I told him go back to her if he’s gonna talk and text and share whatever daily .1500 texts a month and over 300 calls to me is too much . He won’t go back to her he says he wants to be with me so I don’t understand why all that talking if he was happy with me . I know she’s very manipulative but I still blame him . I’m feeling like I am missing something .His behavior is very confusing
Ya. It's Def a huge slap in the face when you have sat there and listened to him tell you all of these things that his ex did to break his heart. Hurt him. And ruin their relationship. Yet for some reason there is still this annoying loyalty STILL there. . . Same thing here. My boyfriend tries to tell me. Oh I blocked her. But then when it's convenient he mentions how he is calling her. She contacts him all freaking week long and not just about kids. He acts all annoyed when he mentions it to me. Like he can't stand her. But then when I personally SEE the conversation my self, he is polite as can be. He goes out of his way to bend over backwards any time she doesn't want to parent their five year old. Or if she needs car advice. She was on his insurance up until today. And only off because the insurance company literally told him she had to be. When she shouldn't have been on there to begin with. He will see me get pist. Make these comments that I should basically be tolerant because when I met him, unknown to me. He had barely kicked her out a few months before and wasn't even legally divorced, so my divorce was two years old when he met me. And that means I somehow am supposed to be some kind of patient because his is newer. Dude him and I are going on a YEAR! I truly wonder on a regular basis, that regardless of how good of a woman I am compared to her, as his wife coming home with hickies and cheating four damn times with four different dudes. In the 6 years they were married. That at the end of the day. He isn't over her. And I refuse to compete 🤷🏼♀️ especially with that! ....sorry just venting. I could only imagine your anger and your hurt. I am so sorry 😔
Sorry your goingbthrough same thing. What's good is your not married to him so you can walk away if you want with less headaches ..These men just don't respect themselves enough apparently to be treated better by the exes .
I think people are underhanded and not truthful! I think there’s hidden feelings even if they’re remarried they can be very deceitful
Its usually men who don't know how to communicate rules. If he hasn't set boundaries he wants none
This is COMMON SENSE ADVICE
Engaged and my fiancée ex just never seems to go away from the picture. They have a child in common (21yrold) they still have to contact each other and always when we aren't together or when he is at work. The messages are always deleted if they text. I blocked her # and he unblocked it. So close to just say f*ck it to thos engagement since I dont feel respected or like he gives me me place as future wife.
Ouch! That’s awful
RUN RUN RUN FAST
ITS AN INTEGRITY ISSUE DONT HANG OUT buddy buddy I understand if they have young children
19:35 oh yes I had a friend husband pull that crap like oh we bought this house together so it's their house. too, she had key could come in whatever . I told my friend then yay need to move to house thats both of urs
Im dating a man and I waited many years of being single for. He already has a child from a previous marriage but his ex wife and him get a long a little " too well". I wish, they had more of a horrible breakup because she comes around the house whenever she feels like it and only lives 5 minutes away from him. Its great that there relationship is amicable for the sake of their ten year old, but I dont like her coming around for coffees. I have asked that if he plans to marry me, he needs to have clearer boundaries with her. He won't ever have to meet any of my exes, but I will feel very uncomfortable her just " coming over" especially without me present. I want to have me as the wife and her being his past, needs to be dealt with in the right way. I am finding this hard because he says they are just friends, but they aren't, their exes. He wont have to deal with mine, so im finding it hard, that I have to deal with her.
Makes perfect sense.
Leave him. Why are you getting into this drama?
That would make me uncomfortable too :(
My husband have a 28 year old daughter that always invite him when her mom, (his ex wife) is present. Invite to go stay in airbnb while on vacation, invite to her mom's house. I don't like it.
My bf and I have been together for a year. When I first met him his ex wasn't talking to him she had him blocked, at one time she had a restraining order on him. Now they're talking (they have 5 young adult kids) he says they're talking for the kids BUT recently she has been telling him she has problems with her new husband and her marriage is I guess on the rocks. I got upset and we had a big argument. He says he will not go back and doesn't know why she's telling him this. Another time she was complaining to him about her hormonal woman issues. He says it's because they were together for a long time. Should I be concerned. He made it clear he's going to continue communicating with her because of the kids.
At least he's telling you in then open..It's worse to be lied to and told they don't even speak then you find out they do on a daily basis .
It's inappropriate of her to be telling him that stuff. That crosses a boundary. My BF's ex was opening up to him about her struggles w/ her bf, the guy she cheated on my bf, her ex for. Inappropriate. Keep the dialogue about kids + that's it. When my name is brought up there's issues yet she can bring her BF's name up, no problem.
My BFS exwife the mother of his 16 yr old, she is remarried and she saw us interacting at church as good friends but are interested in each other. His ex wife started to interrogate me as to how I knew her ex, also she told me “ I am the mother of Isaiah” and they are coming to church tomorrow. Again this ex wife has been married for 8 yrs to someone else. She’s 47 and acts like a teenager. She has no right to ask me all these questions. They were only married for a short time. he does not interact with her. But invites her and her husband to their sons birthday parties.
This is great advice rewatching ❤❤❤❤ thank you
Boy is this needed advice
My fiance lived beside his x and didn't tell me.
Wow
Run !!!
SPOT ON
FORSAKING ALL OTHERS!!
$250/1k subscribers on youtube. Push you to a bigger audience
That's disrespectful and disloyal. As your husband, you should be his #1 confidant and priority. You 2 became 1 when you both said "i do". Where's the concern for you?
I think it’s very suspicious
the ex of my BF confronted me! How dare her at church trying to let me know that she’s the mother of their kid.
Do all of these principles still apply if you're dating and S/O has potential narcissistic abuse from their ex (unresolved) and they overly communicate and vacation at their home or spend birthdays and holidays with ex and ex in laws?
I love this.