Me! Although I've been getting over him.... and going through the workbooks make it a little harder sometimes because I find myself focusing on that relationship (we were together 9 years) and I start to miss him again. But I know this is necessary so I push through!
Your workbooks and videos are one of the things that keep me going. I do one exercise per day without breaks. Once I'm done, I'll probably start again to retain the information. Broken heart is a great motivator. Thanks Coach for all your hard work!
After 4yrs. She broke up on 15th sept. I used no contact rule and She reach out at 18th Sept. 20th Sept. 24 Sept. And 26th Sept and she accepted she love and missed me and she's want to be with me. Also she told me she need a little bits of time and not to contact her until she did. But I can't hold anymore, Coach Craig Kenneth need your suggestion.
Me! I'm learning so much. I know this may be asking a lot but it would be great if you had a forum on your website where those of us who bought the knowledge could ask questions.
When I travel I don’t listen music I put this on and look outside with this in my ear, when I go to sleep I listen to this to fall asleep when I wake up I listen to this it rlly helps with the anxiety❤️
Imagine having Margarete as your mom and Graig as your brother on those difficult times.. Man no one would suffer for to long. Just imagining those two to talk with you as you want, would make things so much easier. Love them. And watching them everyday for hours and hours.
This is actually a very very good explanation on why not reaching out is by far the best thing to do, and also what happens in the ex during your not reaching out. So good!
I never knew that you craig and margaret are the new type of drug that could help ease our relationship diseases.. appreciate your work man...GOD BLESS
My ex reached out EXACLTY after 30 days of NC. He needed to talk about something very serious and I was the only who could understand... We didn't talk too much about our emotions but he could have talked to ANYONE about this, but he chose to reach out. I am still going to go through NC after the conversation and MAKE him reach out again. Be strong peeps!
So I saw my ex last night at a mutual friends get together I brought up some old memories she did too and she never once mentioned about the guy she’s with idk if they are together still about 5-6 months passed before this meetup happened she said I looked different and the whole time she was there we just laughed and played a few games of pool mostly turns out things haven’t been going too well on her side so really guys if ur ex seems really happy without u u never know what’s going on inside their head
Okay, my ex really IS stubborn by nature. But how can we tell the difference between an ex feeling too prideful and willful at the moment to make contact and one who is gone, gone, gone?
I can’t emphasize much more how much these videos have helped me through my break up. After 2 years of being together, I got dumped right after New Years because she didn’t think it was the correct time for us. Till this day I still don’t know what “It’s just not the right time” mean!? I started the No Contact rule on the 2nd of January and gave in a week later. I wrote her a page long letter apologizing for all the stupid shit I did and surprisingly she wrote back! Thanking me for understanding why she broke off things and that it’s not the right time for us. So that being said, by what coach Craig has taught me. I must move on, let go, work on myself and start no contact again. And I intend to do that exactly. Hoping for the best! Thanks Coach Craig & Margaret for your wise words.
Same, 7 months here. Silence is a form of communication, however, and a powerful one at that. In her eyes, you likely look strong, independent, and like you’ve moved on. She will be much more curious about you. Being in contact with her with NEVER make her view you in that way. You’ll also never know what she’s thinking or feeling at any given time so don’t try...it may seem ‘viscous’ that she hasn’t reached out but that’s your idea not hers.
@@shaunab.4281 My ex husband reached out to me after nearly 2 years as well. Not sure why he did it since it turns out he got remarried. We had been in NC that whole time. He gets nostalgic when we talk and even confessed to still having feelings. It just proves people will come back eventually, even if you don't reconcile.
Great video! 15 years of marriage ended in a very high conflict divorce in April. I believe my ex-was a Narcissist, and I finally stood up for myself during and after the divorce exposing his affair, lies, manipulation, and gas-lighting. As much as I miss him (trauma bond), I know that this is for the best. I will continue to get therapy and work on me. Thank you both for your videos.
I made the mistake of begging and pleading my ex and it really pushed her away after I had a second chance I rushed into it and showed my emotions, I now realise since watching you both is how big a mistake I made. Doubt we will talk again
Wow you just described my breakup perfectly. He actually didn’t want to break up but felt he had to for reasons I won’t go into right here. It came out of nowhere. Totally loving and affectionate the night before and then boom. He immediately got cold and callous when I did everything wrong and begged etc. He ended up saying that he had to compartmentalize and put me and his feelings about me in a box. He didn’t deal with them at all. He immediately asked out a girl who had flirted with him and has been in a rebound relationship ever since we’re 4 months broken up today). I saw them at an event for the first time last week and couldn’t believe my eyes. The body language was terrible. He never introduced her to anyone. She was an introverted wallflower. Nothing wrong with that except he’s the opposite and kept leaving her at the table to go socialize all night. He finally danced with her at the end of the night after watching me dance with others. Last night he checked all my social media pages and opened our chat app which time stamps when someone last looked at your chat. I had pretty much lost all hope until seeing that last night.
WOW, another 10 out of 10 video...I cannot believe what gems these videos are! I thank you for your hard work and know that you are a real life changer for me and many, many others. Long live Coach Craig and Margaret! Greetings, Rob
Either my ex is stubborn or just doesn’t care or isn’t interested at all to reach out. Haven’t heard from my ex in well over a year. Oh well, if she don’t want me someone else will
Thanks, man. This video gives me hope. I am focusing on correcting my own mistakes, ways of thinking, workout, learn new skills to be the best me when she is ready to talk again. If she is too stubborn, I will reach out when I am ready.
never fool for a woman bro , they are emotinal based , one day they feel good around you and other day they hate you , so you can never trust to a woman , when someone says something to us we beliave and trust and thinking about that way , on locigal point of view , that is why when girls play hot and cold , interested and disinterested we confuse and say to ourself how a person can be this fickle , they are just kids and does not know what they want , never take them serious or take things personally otherwise it will fuck you up and you will question everything , when you talk with a woman think as like you are talking with a 10 years old child , never put your emotions on it
35 days of NC so far and almost 6 months since the breakup. I still cry every day. I have been working on myself and have lost 36 pounds and have been reading books on relationships. I cry every day on the drive to and from the gym on some days. I wish she would contact me. This is the most intense pain I have ever felt. We were together for 4 years and she left because I developed an eating disorder and went up to 300 pounds and became depressed and didn't want to leave the house and spend quality time with her because I physically couldn't move and I was ashamed of how I looked. I think she left me because of that, I really don't know because she never gave me an explanation. Some days the pain is so bad that I wish somebody would just kill me just to make the hurt stop.
My breakup was last July. We were together 4 years as well. 102 days of NC. I spent about 6 months begging lol. I get it though. My advice to you is don't criticize yourself too hard. Women are just wired differently than men. I've seen gorgeous women with bigger men or what some people see a less attractive or whatever. It's not all about looks man. It's about confidence and being secure with yourself and knowing your self worth. When my girl left me, it was all sorts of excuses. Nothing was consistent and it was all confusing to me. The point is, they were just bored and done with you. I don't know how good your relationship was not if it was a good one and you continue to work on you, you'll feel less pain. Not saying you won't think about her still because I still do as well but I can eat, sleep, work and workout and hang with family and friends and life is good. We were all single at one point in our lives. Mainly high school years or just after and we can be single again. Just keep the NC going and don't break it.... EVER!!! She'll either miss you or won't but if you work on yourself and get that confidence going, women will feel that. There's a energy you put out there and people can sense it. Better days are ahead though, I promise because I felt like you did too.
@@axelbriggjern3534 I stopped counting the NC days but its well past the 3 month mark. I am still very sad and still cry but its no longer every day so I guess thats a sign of improvement. I am continuing with my workouts and my weight keeps dropping and I am getting stronger physically as the weeks progress. I just wish I could get over all this already. I still have to force myself to get out of bed every day and deal with the day and missing this person who kicked me out of her life. If I had been a piece of crap boyfriend, this would be so much easier to accept because it would be a "that's what you get for treating her that way" type of thing but I was a good partner to her the whole time and that's what has made this so hard. Thank you for your words, Axel. It really means a lot.
@@underclassh3r058 Thank you for reaching out and writing all that. Its been over 3 months of NC and I still miss her a lot and still cry and I hate myself for feeling that way because I wish I could just let it go but its not like there is an on/off switch for feelings. Our relationship was great, there was no fighting or abuse or cheating or anything like that. That is what makes this so hard because if i had been a piece of crap to her, it would be more easy to accept that she left me because of that but I was good to her the entire time. You are right though, she just got bored and tired of me. I have thought about this as well this whole time apart from her. She didn't even give me a proper or even a dumb excuse to leave. She just drifted away slowly and then hit me with a text saying "I am not for you and you are not for me". I was blidsighted by it. She got bored of me. That hurts even more and I feel so worthless. One thing she can't take away is my ability to better myself. I am over 50 lbs down and I want to lose 50 more and I am reading so many self-help books and working on The Knowledge. This still hurts so damn much but I won't break NC. I know my worth and I will not chase after somebody who doesn't want me in their life. Thank you for reaching out and writing all that. I hope I can get to a point where I can stop feeling this pain more sooner than later because I hate having to live day after day with this pain and not having anything to take it away.
@@jessiepalermo7234 Jessie Palermo I know man. I told you better days are ahead and they are and they have been for me. At the same time, I've been sucked into every RUclips video on women and relationships. Learning all I can. Trying to find a balance between being a good/loving guy and Alpha. Before I go further, 1) I was a great guy and I would say that 85% of each year with my ex, we were great but the other 15% was bad. I had a mouth on me and my words hurt. That said, it's not like she didn't hurt me really bad. She just didn't use words but when we were on, we were on fire and in a good way. She just didn't see it that way. Looking at myself during this time of self progress and self reflection, I've learned that I don't need to yell or get mad. The reason I did was because I was insecure with myself. I'm very very secure with who I am because I know my worth. I found it during this breakup. I've even tested it on on girls that I've gone out with. So when you're ready to date again or get your ex back (should that happen), it's ok to be jerk. Women sadly want you to challenge them. They want you to say "no". This one girl gets mad at me all the time. I never yell, I never swear and I never apologize.... EVER!!! I am who I am and I'm in control. I tell her that I won't be second to other guys aaaaaaand at times I tell get bluntly about what I see and want with a few simple words. Yes she gets upset and blocks me and sends me text about how she doesn't like me and you know what? She can't make it a whole day without talking to me. I just let her be and I don't chase. It's always her apologizing. And why? Because she sees I'm strong and I'm indifferent and confident because I am. I've been single for almost a year now and I don't need my ex and I don't need her or any other girl. They are nice to have but you are the prize my friend. Once you see that, you'll see relationships a lot differently. We sadly don't live in the 50s anymore. The world has changed and we're playing by the girls rules. If you ever doubt your money or looks, just remember that even Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp got left and they were successful and had money. Girls just get bored. Now to wrap this up, I'm not saying you can't be great to a woman and treat her nicely. Just don't show your cards and don't tell her everything you're thinking. You've always gotta be a mystery and strong. Make her text you good morning 90% of the time. Never apologize (big beta move), stop texting emojis (James Bond wouldn't do that). I made all these mistakes and then some because I cared too much. I still do but I learned the hard way that you can't reveal yourself to be this "nice guy". Surf RUclips on the red pill stuff and read the comments and listen to these guys but filter it as some of these guys are just angry but there is truth in what they are saying and then you just need to apply it to your life. Keep doing what you're doing. Focus on you and remember that you are the prize and women will chase you. Love them like they'll be with you forever but protect yourself as if they'll leave you tomorrow.
@@underclassh3r058 Dude. Thank you so much. Damn. I needed to hear that. Thank you so damn much. This is going to keep me going and I will come back to this whenever I feel weak or overwhelmed with all this that I am going through.
Thanks for your videos Craig. You and Margaret have great insight. I'm learning so much. I've made a lot of mistakes but know I've done a lot of things right as well. She appears to have mild to moderate bipolar symptoms. She is taking a new antidepressant that seems to make her a little manic. I go back and forth from feeling there is no hope but other times feel she will eventially come back.
I am in a really difficult situation... she broke up with me and I realized something yesterday. I was cold and neglected her, the problem was, that I was frustrated, I had my own problems and didnt want her to feel them, nor share my worries. This frustration was growing and I was fleeing from those problems, the side effect was the the mentioned cold behavior. She texted me yesterday, I helped her. A few hours later told her about my conclusion about the relationship (I feel like she's taken my behavior too personal), but also said, that I dont expect her to change her mind.
I really want to know all those things my ex cannot tolerant. He never showed or expressed proactively. He's a bit dismissive avoidant. Every time I try to ask him it's like pushing him to do sth painful. But without him telling me, I really am not sure if my guesses are correct.
My ex is stubborn, but I also believe he has Borderline mixed with narcissistic and depressive episodes. I've studied 1 year long by myself Borderline through reading after a Psychologist friend told me that he could have it. I was patient 2 years long. I could even teach him how to change his emotional abusive traits to a certain extent. Seriously I was even thinking about becoming a therapist, because everyone started to ask me how I did it. I was patient and often reacted with love, but I've started to set boundaries that didnt sound like ultimatums. Sadly last 2 months I believe that his life problems loaded also to some episodes. He was often very defensive, created fights where he verbally abused me. So almost 2 weeks ago it escalated and he himself quit the relationship ( again = typical Bpd) . He basically does crap and then runs from solving things for 70% and jumps directly to " ending the relationship ". I've confronted him that he abused me and wasn't supportive and kind of evil. After hours he apologized, and wrote that he is sad to hurt me and afraid to hurt me more. However I kept my boundary and told him that it has to change. He sounded vulnerable so I did No Contact after that for a week. In our case 1 week is like a month lol. But he ignored my message so I've told him that I'm sad etc.that he ignoring me in such a way..my message wasn't bad or desperate. I know he is alive etc.. so I know he giving me the toxic silent treatment. Therefore I love to watch your videos. Each time I feel like posting something on WhatsApp that shows I care about him, I just watch your videos or I force myself to do things. I'm not a typical codependent as I thought, read about it also lol...but I guess once you start to set boundaries and the other person tht maybe has a disorder and is untreated, reacts to it...it is never ending well. It's like you're trying to reason with a 5 year old. I love him, but I'll remain to my second attempt of No Contact...I'm at day 4 🙌 ....
No contact works. Trust me. Just happened for me. I done all the wrong things and finally left him alone after I found these videos and he reached out. Now I don’t know that I even want him Back after all I’ve went through in the past 6 months alone. It’s funny how it works. Lol. Thanks for the great advice Craig and Margaret 💕
I'm starting to believe that a majority of these ex's are getting a kick out of knowing that person wants them back or the pure power of just being able to say let me stop all this foolishness let get back together and never look back
The way i see it ,is that even doe you think that they don't love you any more,deep down they do.remember they fall in love with you and it not because you force them,is that you had something that is different than other and that what make it so strong.Yes is that we are afraid to be rejected if we text back or do a call indirect.That why we try to touch the water before get in.
I went to talk about reconciliation and my ex is all pissed off still 2 months later talking about how she DOESNT WANT TO GET BACK TOGETHER!! And stuff. When I never even brought up getting back together... wtf
How much time do you give them ? Its been 4 months apart, yes i did the begging and pleading for 2 months if not a bit longer. I speak to her every second week when I pick up the kids but not about anything special
Could you do a video on exs that are insecure(about themselves ) or current partners that are insecure. How do we notice or help them with their insecurities?
Omg 3:30 this just reminded me of our relationship, it was always her way or no way! Thank you for reminding me! My ego just wants her to reach out so i can reject her haha but i’m really doing some inner work to get over it
Hi Coach Craig and Margaret - I really like your videos! I think the video ignores something that may possibly happen: You are still waiting for your "stubborn" ex to contact you; In the meantime, you have started to date someone new (and perhaps your ex has, too); You may still miss your ex, and your ex may still miss you (and maybe he/she is in a rebound relationship); A couple of months have passed and: 1. Either your ex is still missing you but they know you have someone new - so they won't reach out 2. OR by the time they reach out you are starting a new relationship - so how LONG should you wait...? Maybe if you hadn't started a new relationship they would have contacted you 3. OR your ex's so called "rebound" has helped them to forget you / your ex is doing everything to forget you even though they are missing you...they are basically fighting it. What do you? You don't date? You let them fight themselves and forget you? You are dating someone but somehow insinuating to them that you want them to reach out? Sometimes it's just complicated even though desire & love are so powerful... What do you think?
I have begged and pleaded one time after breakup for a day. Then after a week I tried talking to her to give me another chance to which she completely denied but she asked me many time to remain friends with me to which I declined. And later after 2days she misbehaved with me and so we both ended up arguing. Then after 2 weeks I again contacted her to just remain like friends as she said me earlier but this time she herself declined to be friends and disrespected me and insulted me instead. After that I blocked her and I am no contact since then for 6weeks now. Will the previous conversations with her hamper my chances?
Hi Craig, wonderful video as always. Not directly related to stubbornness but could you do something on whether a person can switch attachment styles during a relationship. I feel this is what happened to me...
Latvian women are reeaaaaaly stoborn in this. They would prefer to keep silent and not reach out then to do something about it. They even accept worse future partners, just because they think that the previous relationship can not be fixed. So, they will not even bother themselves with such ideas like getting back together again.
Hi craig im from the philippines and i am always watching ur vid, i just want to know how long should i wait for them to reach out? Its been 9months now since my break up but still i havent hear from her
Hoping to schedule an email coaching next month. Have been watching your videos and not contacting him at all. He blocked me on FB. As hurtful as breakup was, he was the guy I developed the most attachment to with daily chats and he really helped me through my dad's brief illness and death in March. He has bipolar disorder and been divorced twice. So many things come into play. Definitely could use your input.
We broke up and initially were getting along just fine, she said she wanted to marry me when she got her shit together and stuff like that. Later she started saying I’d not given her space and we argued a lot. She would get pissy with me whenever I went out (we were still talking everyday) just like we used to, she told me she loved me a few times and kissed me a few times after we broke up before any of this happened but then she started saying all of our friends had told her I’d been talking crap about her and one day she told me she’d slept with another dude (I later found out the dude she slept with was the guy who was trying to get together with her before we started dating). She then changed her story and said she knows didn’t think that I’d said any crap about her. I kinda feel like she was just trying to mess with my head and didn’t know what she wanted.
My ex reached out three months after the break up. We set dates to hang out and She has a boyfriend now, I don’t know how to go about it. What should I do? Any advice would be great!
Just focus on having a good time, try to avoid any relationship talk. Try to reattract her in simple but not over bearing ways. Keep it light and keep it fun. After the date analyze the date and make a decision based on how you felt it went and what you think the best part going forward
It could be good! Its a position you probably have been waiting for. If it was me, as I went through this exact thing, when you originally met, was your ex in a relationship? Even if the relationship was on the way out? If not thats a positive for sure. If your ex was... Look into triangulation. Every situation is different. My ex as it turns out always had a foot in another place ( not cheating but having backup )
My ex of 5 years broke up with me. We had an amazing relationship, no complaints. I did NC for 2 1/2 months, she contacted me wanting to see my dog, so when I got back into town we met up and I asked her to bring my things back to me. Our meet up was great, but she did cry multiple times and the reason for her crying she said I make her emotional not because she’s mad or sad, but because she remembers all the good times we had. She also mentioned she unfollowed me on instagram because she saw me with another girl on my story. She also mentioned she stalks me everyday and watches all my stories still. She forgot my things so a few weeks later we met up again and it was another great time and she cried again and asked why I didn’t tell her happy birthday and if I forgot. She said she misses hanging out with me and my friends. When I text her she is very quick to reply. I am not sure what she is doing. She obviously misses me and loves me, but won’t initiate or admit she possibly wants me back. I am confused on what to do. Should I continue to allow her to watch my instagram stories? Or maybe cause paranoia by hiding my stories from her? I’m just so confused on what it is I need to do.
What about if they have friends that they moved in with that are non stop talking mad crap about me and is constantly telling her to move on and to never come back to me? You know how friends are.
My situation is very peculiar My Ex broke up with me over the month of August... My Ex had health issues and stressed to the point she ended up in hospital! She has had heart issues all her life... BUT over a stressful incident (not my fault) she blamed me for it ALL and now even after 2 months she blames me and always brings her health issues up and absolutely HATES me... She hasn't blocked me on anything... I've been understanding and have been kind to her every time I've spoken to her... YET she still HATES ME and blames me for all her issues... We were together for 3 amazing months then she just broke me! I am hopeful to get her back one day! Just need advice on anything.
what if my ex has already reached the stage of missing me and is making it so clear through his actions? however he says he has trouble forgetting all the bad memories tho he still misses and cares about me dearly. is there ever a chance for these memories to slowly be forgotten and for us to get back tgt and start afresh?
😆 you are both so amazing Margaret and Craig. I’ve watched many of your clips .. good job guys . Can you make a video « after pulling away slowly with little to no contact, he or she broke up with me via TEXT!!! Is that a trend now guys To break up via texts and not in person ?
My ex cheated on me she said her feelings changed and she kept ignoring it, I am totally blindsided by this she seemed so love just the day before! We also share a home. Please help me I'm suffering
its been 3 months after the breakup, we kept talking for a while, then i started doing no contact and waiting for him to reach out, he texted me to tell me he will always love me and then he got cold, he reached again days later with an indirect direct approach and then i failed and contacted him we talked for a bit like we were still together but for moments he was cold, he told me that i should move with him to FL, and that made me fail the no contact, after that i contacted him again and it was a bad idea, he was cold and distant, we are supposed to video facetime on sunday but honestly i dont think it will be a good idea. Idk what to do, its been 3 months and i dont want to get stuck with a person that one day seems to be fine and the next day i feel like he doesnt want me in his life anymore. Help!
So get this I work with my ex of six months, who went into a relationship with someone else that also works there. They got together less than three months after we split. We were together four years this time, with a previous relationship together for eight years. She is ditzy, and was cluesless that we had a history. She must have found out, because she approached me today and said, "I hope I haven't done anything to make you hate me". She said she didn't know that he and I had been together. She was really nervous, rocking back and forth from one foot to another. I was as cool as a freaking cucumber (thank you Craig and Margaret!). I'm sure she will tell him she talked to me, and he will flip! She definitely has an anxious attachment style, and now that she knows about us...well...I hope she pushes him away. Wtf? Who does this? I'll be right over here.
I was dating a guy for almost a year, and I ended our "situationship" because he did not want for us to be exclusive, and I am becoming emotionally invested. But since the breakup, he is constantly "checking on me" every 2-3 weeks. I wasn't too eager for a conversation, nor rude, like what Craig said. Its been four months since we parted ways, and he does not initiate a meetup. Receiving miss calls, calling me by a nickname he gave me, asking me how was family etc. I was telling myself that I should be stronger the next time this happens, but I keep on going back to 0 when he does that, I am still hoping that he would eventually change his mind on things, but he keeps breaking no contact. Is he bored? Is he stubborn to admit? Is he confused? Mixed signals? :( Help.
i try to be strong my ex is hot and cold i suppose u would say, calling me my pet names kissing if we see eachother telling me he still loves me then next day dont message me calling me by my proper name no kisses on texts, its messing my head up cuz im so in love with the guy, i was never allowed to say he was my bf even tho we were exclusive but he said cuz then it indicates it will lead somewhere :/ im trying to do no contact but i wasnt the one who did the breaking up so maybe its because u did it that hes acting that way
Hello Coach Craig! I have a quick question, my bf broke up with me a little over a week ago and just unfollowed me on Instagram last night. Do you think I should unfollow him back too? (even if I still want to get back with him)
my ex dumped me completely out of the blue and put up a new Facebook page with his ex-girlfriend on it! despite that the page said he is single. before his ex-girlfriend was on the page I saw the page and sent him a message asking him what was wrong and telling him that I'm worried about him. This was a month-and-a-half ago. I also called him once only to have him pretend to not know who I was despite that I was calling from my own phone number which he knew by heart, and then I said my name and he hung up on me. what a piece of crap. I have done nothing since. I have not contacted him in anyway. I was hoping he would at least come around and explain himself. instead, out of the blue again, he has now blocked me from messaging him on his new Facebook page to spite that I was not messaging him! I sent him the one message a month-and-a-half ago which he never read! It shows the message is unread even to this day and yet he blocked me from messaging him at all just a few days ago. why would someone block you from messaging them if you weren't messaging them? I thought maybe his ex-girlfriend put the whole page up herself and then she's doing this but of course he's not speaking to me and he pretended not to know who I was when I called and he is the one who hung up so I guess all this other stuff is him as well. Can you explain what this is?
My ex is so stubborn that after 4 month of NC she sends her mother for the rest of her stuff in the apt. her birthday being near, yeahh what a coincedence on puting me on some thought investment... what does she want... I dont know, what to do? some help please...it feels like,, hey Im hear, but in an aggresive way...help please..I love her and miss her so much... but I went on NC since day 1...not a single hi...is she pissed because of that? Is this her direct indirect approach, or this is her being pissed cause of the NC since day 1 not a single hi or begging or pleading..
No one can get into her head. Maybe she is mad you didn't try to chase or maybe she just wants to move on. Sending her mom to get her stuff isn't an indirect direct approach. An indirect direct approach is if she contacts you with some excuse like "can you give me the recipe for your chicken soup". It's random contact when the person doesn't want to come out and say "I miss you".
Yeahh what a coinscidene her birthday being near... its like no contact is fucking with her head so I must put this guy in some thought investment and see if he talks to me it really looks like that... I will go NC until the end...until she is humble enough to talk to me...I wasnt the best bf ever but she had attitude problems...if she wants her stuff well thats fine... everything she does has consecuences...and this pain and pride and anxiety and power struggle will not last for ever...that is the only certain thing I know...If she gets her stuff she will make it easier for me to keep moving forward.. . so on the long run probably she is doing a favour to me....I will only be this cool character watching the show with popcorn and never stop working on myself...If she wants my attention..she will have it being humble and peaceful...not making war like a spoiled bratt...
What if you are on good terms after 30 day. No contact and i have phyical , mentally abd pdycologically changed. I am happy at peace i have even been seeing a therapist and practicing being positive but they are in a rebound relationship. Will they ever come back???
So if my stubborn ex contacts me during no contact with an indirect direct message do I reply since that’s the best he can do?? We broke up bc he had a goal prior to dating to continue his education and career out of state. After a year of dating I asked for commitment (he had never asked me to be his gf) he said he couldn’t continue the relationship while out of state so I broke it off even though he had made no plans to leave yet.
Thsnk Craig for your knowledge. I am so tired trying to get over this situation. My girlfriend break up two weeks ago and since then I decided not to talk with her (no contact) after I drop my last message that " i have given her the space she needs that she should contact me whenever she change her mind"... When I asked her the reason why she broke up then the only thing she could say is that "I am a good Christian, a kind and gentle guy, that we have so many differences that I love her more than she loves me" I really love my girlfriend and want her to come back to me. I am really confused. I wanted to call her this weekend to see what she have to say. Please guys, what should I do?
You are anxious just like I was just after the breakup. It's only been two weeks. She needs time to miss you and to appreciate you for who you are. My ex liked that I was a Christian and many things about me but logic with her doesnt apply. She went from reasons of we have differences to we don't seem compatable to we dont seem natural together to she just wants to be alone and her latest... She's afraid I'm going to change who I am for her. I wish I could afford the coaching from Craig but my finance aren't good right now. I have learned a lot however in the last 2 months and am trying to engage in personal growth. Work on yourself. Keep watching the videos.
@Scott Nowakowski thanks so much. You said it all. I guess that is what she is exactly thinking about change. I couldn't afford the finance too. I just hope one day she realise and come back to me. I am on No contact for almost three weeks now. I told her in my last reply that she should work on her prefences. The videos have really helped me to know the necessities. Thanks so much. I really appreciate dude.
@@josefedu8595 No problem. I know it hurts a lot. Hang in there. Be strong. It will get better as time passes. You may be in a better position than me with 3 weeks compared to 3 months since my break up. Dont break the no contact.
I like a guy he likes me too but never express it n when i try to express he change the topic i dont want my love story to end before starting can u please suggest me something Sir
I’ve been watching a lot of these videos except none that I have found address the grieving partner. My boyfriend lost a parent and grandparent in a short span of time, became depressed, antisocial and a workaholic. Our relationship was great but it became too much for a new relationship to endure. Its been 30 days of no contact but I’m not sure if this is the right way or what else I can do?
Vince Garza yes because your other option is to chase! Dude your time is your time, if she wants more of what she can't have then she's obviously not respecting your wishes. No contact and if she reaches out then negotiations can resume! Don't compromise more of yourself than what's healthy for you!
Vince Garza please DO NOT LISTEN TO THE GUY ABOVE ME! If she broke up with you because she felt neglected and that you wasn’t giving her time why would you continue to not give her any attention and no time with nc? Does that even make sense? How about fixing what she said she’s unhappy with and trying to work it out? She didn’t break up with u because of your personality or anything, but the fact that she felt neglected which can be fixed without doing nc
Hi, are there people around here who want to talk and give advice about my situation? Basicly my ex broke up like 2 months ago and we had our fights and chats after it, never worked out because we didnt had our rest period of course. So last weekend she called me on accident and I picked up my phone. We had a chat and after I texted her if she wanted to go for a walk. So in the end we met and we both were not sure if it would be good to meet but actual we had such a great time together that day. She told me that I changed so that was a nice achievement/compliment. After that I started talking a bit more about what happend and boom we kissed again. So after that we went to the station and said goodbye in a nice way. Here it comes, she actual asked me "spontanious" if I want to go with her to France next weekend. For me this sounds like the moment I was hoping for to happen. I could use some guidance in this situation. Since we both mentioned we have missed each other and I would like to take this oppertunity the right way haha.
Temxion ' dude it sounds great in my opinion. Her interest sounds high again. Just be cool on your end and enjoy it! Keep watching videos on relationship maintenance, as you can move away from breakup therapy! Congratulations!
@@Danash2013 these are beautiful empowering words to me, thank you! I will watch those video's! Hopeful they will give me some extra power and confidence haha! Staying cool is doable, I would do a lot to win her back. But I know I have fear of losing loved ones that could make it a bit harder.
Temxion ' Temxion ' watch Corey Wayne dude. Always gauge her attraction to you. You must be mindful that breakups can happen out of nowhere. You seem aware of your anxiety, so keep working on that. Keep her out of your personal growth, as that's for you! Also watch Craig's vids on being their mountain and being their superman, you can never let a woman move you off your emotional centre and core! Bon voyage!
My ex broke up with me at the end of February. I respected his decision. We talked later and told me I broke up with him. Because of this I didn't feel right about doing a long NC. Each time I would write after waiting maybe 5 or 10 days. He always answers me with he misses me and twice sent pictures of red roses. And the last time a picture of a cupid. He has never written to me first. Should I start NC until he writes to me first? Is there a chance we will get back together?
3 weeks separated now. but he is daily texting me. he does random visits. he is saying he wants out but he is sending me mixed signals. is he just guilty for hurting me?
Post pics with a guy you legit like.. Not to make an ex jealous.. "Moving on" is the only way to create value and attraction.. Don't go overboard though.. That's when it becomes obvious that you're trying to get someone's attention.
@J J If it's months later, it's fine. One can't assume jealousy if you're in NC beyond 3-4 months. Then that's just the exes insecurity. Can't wait around forever.
Who’s working on The Knowledge this weekend? Remember true change takes spending time on yourself!
Me! Although I've been getting over him.... and going through the workbooks make it a little harder sometimes because I find myself focusing on that relationship (we were together 9 years) and I start to miss him again. But I know this is necessary so I push through!
Your workbooks and videos are one of the things that keep me going. I do one exercise per day without breaks. Once I'm done, I'll probably start again to retain the information. Broken heart is a great motivator. Thanks Coach for all your hard work!
After 4yrs. She broke up on 15th sept. I used no contact rule and She reach out at 18th Sept. 20th Sept. 24 Sept. And 26th Sept and she accepted she love and missed me and she's want to be with me. Also she told me she need a little bits of time and not to contact her until she did. But I can't hold anymore, Coach Craig Kenneth need your suggestion.
Me! I'm learning so much. I know this may be asking a lot but it would be great if you had a forum on your website where those of us who bought the knowledge could ask questions.
Coach Craig Kenneth can i get that book at a book store ?
Can I just say I really love Margaret? I love my own mother but I feel like Margaret is a wonderful motherly teacher.
She’s the best. I love her too!
She's has some funny one liners
She’s in heaven now; this was painful and shocking and unbelievable to me!!!
When I travel I don’t listen music I put this on and look outside with this in my ear, when I go to sleep I listen to this to fall asleep when I wake up I listen to this it rlly helps with the anxiety❤️
It'd been 4 months since my break up. I'm still watching everyday.
Kenny Tai same here. :(
Me too
Stay motivated on The Knowledge Kenny!
Mine 9 months im still watching too
Move on
Imagine having Margarete as your mom and Graig as your brother on those difficult times..
Man no one would suffer for to long.
Just imagining those two to talk with you as you want, would make things so much easier.
Love them. And watching them everyday for hours and hours.
Craig is more like that cool uncle
This is actually a very very good explanation on why not reaching out is by far the best thing to do, and also what happens in the ex during your not reaching out. So good!
I never knew that you craig and margaret are the new type of drug that could help ease our relationship diseases.. appreciate your work man...GOD BLESS
Agreeee
My ex reached out EXACLTY after 30 days of NC. He needed to talk about something very serious and I was the only who could understand... We didn't talk too much about our emotions but he could have talked to ANYONE about this, but he chose to reach out. I am still going to go through NC after the conversation and MAKE him reach out again. Be strong peeps!
No Sherlock how has it been now?
Give it time , let him reach out again , don't ruin your chances
Up
Update
So I saw my ex last night at a mutual friends get together I brought up some old memories she did too and she never once mentioned about the guy she’s with idk if they are together still about 5-6 months passed before this meetup happened she said I looked different and the whole time she was there we just laughed and played a few games of pool mostly turns out things haven’t been going too well on her side so really guys if ur ex seems really happy without u u never know what’s going on inside their head
Yes I know:)
Okay, my ex really IS stubborn by nature. But how can we tell the difference between an ex feeling too prideful and willful at the moment to make contact and one who is gone, gone, gone?
did i leave anchovies at the back of your refrigerator ??! OMG! Hilarious Margaret!!
My view of thinking my ex is stubborn has changed today. Yes she was never stubborn before break up. Human psychology is so unpredictable.
I can’t emphasize much more how much these videos have helped me through my break up. After 2 years of being together, I got dumped right after New Years because she didn’t think it was the correct time for us. Till this day I still don’t know what “It’s just not the right time” mean!? I started the No Contact rule on the 2nd of January and gave in a week later. I wrote her a page long letter apologizing for all the stupid shit I did and surprisingly she wrote back! Thanking me for understanding why she broke off things and that it’s not the right time for us. So that being said, by what coach Craig has taught me. I must move on, let go, work on myself and start no contact again. And I intend to do that exactly. Hoping for the best! Thanks Coach Craig & Margaret for your wise words.
6 months in of no contact and have heard nothing from her. Vicious 😖
Same, 7 months here. Silence is a form of communication, however, and a powerful one at that. In her eyes, you likely look strong, independent, and like you’ve moved on. She will be much more curious about you. Being in contact with her with NEVER make her view you in that way. You’ll also never know what she’s thinking or feeling at any given time so don’t try...it may seem ‘viscous’ that she hasn’t reached out but that’s your idea not hers.
James C it took two years for my ex husband to reach out. Two years of absolute no contact. We are slowly getting back together.
m b Thank you my friend. Some strong and wise words. At 7 months do you hold out any hope for her reaching out?
Shauna B. Good to know. Good luck and many thanks
@@shaunab.4281 My ex husband reached out to me after nearly 2 years as well. Not sure why he did it since it turns out he got remarried. We had been in NC that whole time. He gets nostalgic when we talk and even confessed to still having feelings. It just proves people will come back eventually, even if you don't reconcile.
Great video! 15 years of marriage ended in a very high conflict divorce in April. I believe my ex-was a Narcissist, and I finally stood up for myself during and after the divorce exposing his affair, lies, manipulation, and gas-lighting. As much as I miss him (trauma bond), I know that this is for the best. I will continue to get therapy and work on me. Thank you both for your videos.
These videos are what helps me get through the pain.
Craig and aunt Mar you made me realized who I was and now I em back as in me my self it's good to feel again thank you very much.
I made the mistake of begging and pleading my ex and it really pushed her away after I had a second chance I rushed into it and showed my emotions, I now realise since watching you both is how big a mistake I made. Doubt we will talk again
Update
Now we talking! When i realised the immature ego that Will Never apologise i gave up!
Watching your videos make me feel so much better thank you !
Wow you just described my breakup perfectly. He actually didn’t want to break up but felt he had to for reasons I won’t go into right here. It came out of nowhere. Totally loving and affectionate the night before and then boom. He immediately got cold and callous when I did everything wrong and begged etc. He ended up saying that he had to compartmentalize and put me and his feelings about me in a box. He didn’t deal with them at all. He immediately asked out a girl who had flirted with him and has been in a rebound relationship ever since we’re 4 months broken up today). I saw them at an event for the first time last week and couldn’t believe my eyes. The body language was terrible. He never introduced her to anyone. She was an introverted wallflower. Nothing wrong with that except he’s the opposite and kept leaving her at the table to go socialize all night. He finally danced with her at the end of the night after watching me dance with others. Last night he checked all my social media pages and opened our chat app which time stamps when someone last looked at your chat. I had pretty much lost all hope until seeing that last night.
Finally! Finally I got to hear the definition of the "indirect direct approach." Great video, Craig and Margaret. Thank you!
WOW, another 10 out of 10 video...I cannot believe what gems these videos are! I thank you for your hard work and know that you are a real life changer for me and many, many others. Long live Coach Craig and Margaret! Greetings, Rob
Either my ex is stubborn or just doesn’t care or isn’t interested at all to reach out. Haven’t heard from my ex in well over a year. Oh well, if she don’t want me someone else will
Thanks, man. This video gives me hope. I am focusing on correcting my own mistakes, ways of thinking, workout, learn new skills to be the best me when she is ready to talk again. If she is too stubborn, I will reach out when I am ready.
I just want the pain to go away. she is very very cold towards me. just a week before she was insanely hot for me
Tell me about it bro, same boat..you're stuck in that moment but it will fade over time.
never fool for a woman bro , they are emotinal based , one day they feel good around you and other day they hate you , so you can never trust to a woman , when someone says something to us we beliave and trust and thinking about that way , on locigal point of view , that is why when girls play hot and cold , interested and disinterested we confuse and say to ourself how a person can be this fickle , they are just kids and does not know what they want , never take them serious or take things personally otherwise it will fuck you up and you will question everything , when you talk with a woman think as like you are talking with a 10 years old child , never put your emotions on it
Update???
35 days of NC so far and almost 6 months since the breakup. I still cry every day. I have been working on myself and have lost 36 pounds and have been reading books on relationships. I cry every day on the drive to and from the gym on some days. I wish she would contact me. This is the most intense pain I have ever felt. We were together for 4 years and she left because I developed an eating disorder and went up to 300 pounds and became depressed and didn't want to leave the house and spend quality time with her because I physically couldn't move and I was ashamed of how I looked. I think she left me because of that, I really don't know because she never gave me an explanation. Some days the pain is so bad that I wish somebody would just kill me just to make the hurt stop.
My breakup was last July. We were together 4 years as well. 102 days of NC. I spent about 6 months begging lol. I get it though.
My advice to you is don't criticize yourself too hard. Women are just wired differently than men. I've seen gorgeous women with bigger men or what some people see a less attractive or whatever. It's not all about looks man. It's about confidence and being secure with yourself and knowing your self worth.
When my girl left me, it was all sorts of excuses. Nothing was consistent and it was all confusing to me. The point is, they were just bored and done with you. I don't know how good your relationship was not if it was a good one and you continue to work on you, you'll feel less pain. Not saying you won't think about her still because I still do as well but I can eat, sleep, work and workout and hang with family and friends and life is good. We were all single at one point in our lives. Mainly high school years or just after and we can be single again. Just keep the NC going and don't break it.... EVER!!! She'll either miss you or won't but if you work on yourself and get that confidence going, women will feel that. There's a energy you put out there and people can sense it. Better days are ahead though, I promise because I felt like you did too.
@@axelbriggjern3534 I stopped counting the NC days but its well past the 3 month mark. I am still very sad and still cry but its no longer every day so I guess thats a sign of improvement. I am continuing with my workouts and my weight keeps dropping and I am getting stronger physically as the weeks progress. I just wish I could get over all this already. I still have to force myself to get out of bed every day and deal with the day and missing this person who kicked me out of her life. If I had been a piece of crap boyfriend, this would be so much easier to accept because it would be a "that's what you get for treating her that way" type of thing but I was a good partner to her the whole time and that's what has made this so hard. Thank you for your words, Axel. It really means a lot.
@@underclassh3r058 Thank you for reaching out and writing all that. Its been over 3 months of NC and I still miss her a lot and still cry and I hate myself for feeling that way because I wish I could just let it go but its not like there is an on/off switch for feelings. Our relationship was great, there was no fighting or abuse or cheating or anything like that. That is what makes this so hard because if i had been a piece of crap to her, it would be more easy to accept that she left me because of that but I was good to her the entire time. You are right though, she just got bored and tired of me. I have thought about this as well this whole time apart from her. She didn't even give me a proper or even a dumb excuse to leave. She just drifted away slowly and then hit me with a text saying "I am not for you and you are not for me". I was blidsighted by it. She got bored of me. That hurts even more and I feel so worthless. One thing she can't take away is my ability to better myself. I am over 50 lbs down and I want to lose 50 more and I am reading so many self-help books and working on The Knowledge. This still hurts so damn much but I won't break NC. I know my worth and I will not chase after somebody who doesn't want me in their life. Thank you for reaching out and writing all that. I hope I can get to a point where I can stop feeling this pain more sooner than later because I hate having to live day after day with this pain and not having anything to take it away.
@@jessiepalermo7234 Jessie Palermo I know man. I told you better days are ahead and they are and they have been for me. At the same time, I've been sucked into every RUclips video on women and relationships. Learning all I can. Trying to find a balance between being a good/loving guy and Alpha.
Before I go further, 1) I was a great guy and I would say that 85% of each year with my ex, we were great but the other 15% was bad. I had a mouth on me and my words hurt. That said, it's not like she didn't hurt me really bad. She just didn't use words but when we were on, we were on fire and in a good way. She just didn't see it that way.
Looking at myself during this time of self progress and self reflection, I've learned that I don't need to yell or get mad. The reason I did was because I was insecure with myself. I'm very very secure with who I am because I know my worth. I found it during this breakup. I've even tested it on on girls that I've gone out with.
So when you're ready to date again or get your ex back (should that happen), it's ok to be jerk. Women sadly want you to challenge them. They want you to say "no". This one girl gets mad at me all the time. I never yell, I never swear and I never apologize.... EVER!!!
I am who I am and I'm in control. I tell her that I won't be second to other guys aaaaaaand at times I tell get bluntly about what I see and want with a few simple words. Yes she gets upset and blocks me and sends me text about how she doesn't like me and you know what? She can't make it a whole day without talking to me. I just let her be and I don't chase. It's always her apologizing. And why? Because she sees I'm strong and I'm indifferent and confident because I am.
I've been single for almost a year now and I don't need my ex and I don't need her or any other girl. They are nice to have but you are the prize my friend. Once you see that, you'll see relationships a lot differently. We sadly don't live in the 50s anymore. The world has changed and we're playing by the girls rules. If you ever doubt your money or looks, just remember that even Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp got left and they were successful and had money. Girls just get bored.
Now to wrap this up, I'm not saying you can't be great to a woman and treat her nicely. Just don't show your cards and don't tell her everything you're thinking. You've always gotta be a mystery and strong. Make her text you good morning 90% of the time. Never apologize (big beta move), stop texting emojis (James Bond wouldn't do that). I made all these mistakes and then some because I cared too much. I still do but I learned the hard way that you can't reveal yourself to be this "nice guy". Surf RUclips on the red pill stuff and read the comments and listen to these guys but filter it as some of these guys are just angry but there is truth in what they are saying and then you just need to apply it to your life.
Keep doing what you're doing. Focus on you and remember that you are the prize and women will chase you.
Love them like they'll be with you forever but protect yourself as if they'll leave you tomorrow.
@@underclassh3r058 Dude. Thank you so much. Damn. I needed to hear that. Thank you so damn much. This is going to keep me going and I will come back to this whenever I feel weak or overwhelmed with all this that I am going through.
My ex dumped me in December 2017. I've never heard from him again.
LaoSoftware I hope you have been dating. He may come back but don’t put your life on hold for that long.
Thanks for your videos Craig. You and Margaret have great insight. I'm learning so much. I've made a lot of mistakes but know I've done a lot of things right as well. She appears to have mild to moderate bipolar symptoms. She is taking a new antidepressant that seems to make her a little manic. I go back and forth from feeling there is no hope but other times feel she will eventially come back.
Scott Nowakowski updates?
Why you want someone like that?
Yeah IDK he's so proud & macho. I really hope he's well I miss him. Take care stay awesome everyone.
I am in a really difficult situation... she broke up with me and I realized something yesterday. I was cold and neglected her, the problem was, that I was frustrated, I had my own problems and didnt want her to feel them, nor share my worries. This frustration was growing and I was fleeing from those problems, the side effect was the the mentioned cold behavior. She texted me yesterday, I helped her. A few hours later told her about my conclusion about the relationship (I feel like she's taken my behavior too personal), but also said, that I dont expect her to change her mind.
The same thing happened to me with my ex.
How about their EGO?
Can you please make a video.
Ps. Love you both!
Please
This is one of my favorite videos, thank you Craig for all of your help, when ever I’m going through stuff I watch your videos.
I really want to know all those things my ex cannot tolerant. He never showed or expressed proactively. He's a bit dismissive avoidant. Every time I try to ask him it's like pushing him to do sth painful. But without him telling me, I really am not sure if my guesses are correct.
My ex was too stubborn to admit he wanted his ex wife back! Forget about me
My ex is stubborn, but I also believe he has Borderline mixed with narcissistic and depressive episodes. I've studied 1 year long by myself Borderline through reading after a Psychologist friend told me that he could have it. I was patient 2 years long. I could even teach him how to change his emotional abusive traits to a certain extent. Seriously I was even thinking about becoming a therapist, because everyone started to ask me how I did it. I was patient and often reacted with love, but I've started to set boundaries that didnt sound like ultimatums. Sadly last 2 months I believe that his life problems loaded also to some episodes. He was often very defensive, created fights where he verbally abused me. So almost 2 weeks ago it escalated and he himself quit the relationship ( again = typical Bpd) . He basically does crap and then runs from solving things for 70% and jumps directly to " ending the relationship ". I've confronted him that he abused me and wasn't supportive and kind of evil. After hours he apologized, and wrote that he is sad to hurt me and afraid to hurt me more. However I kept my boundary and told him that it has to change. He sounded vulnerable so I did No Contact after that for a week. In our case 1 week is like a month lol. But he ignored my message so I've told him that I'm sad etc.that he ignoring me in such a way..my message wasn't bad or desperate. I know he is alive etc.. so I know he giving me the toxic silent treatment. Therefore I love to watch your videos. Each time I feel like posting something on WhatsApp that shows I care about him, I just watch your videos or I force myself to do things. I'm not a typical codependent as I thought, read about it also lol...but I guess once you start to set boundaries and the other person tht maybe has a disorder and is untreated, reacts to it...it is never ending well. It's like you're trying to reason with a 5 year old. I love him, but I'll remain to my second attempt of No Contact...I'm at day 4 🙌 ....
No contact works. Trust me. Just happened for me. I done all the wrong things and finally left him alone after I found these videos and he reached out. Now I don’t know that I even want him Back after all I’ve went through in the past 6 months alone. It’s funny how it works. Lol. Thanks for the great advice Craig and Margaret 💕
❤️
@@CoachCraigKenneth you guys have seriously saved me from another breakdown. Thank you.
I love watching you two, the best combo 💞🤸♂️🤸♀️
I'm starting to believe that a majority of these ex's are getting a kick out of knowing that person wants them back or the pure power of just being able to say let me stop all this foolishness let get back together and never look back
I agree!!!!!
But one thing is for sure those tables always turn
It's not the same case for everyone
The way i see it ,is that even doe you think that they don't love you any more,deep down they do.remember they fall in love with you and it not because you force them,is that you had something that is different than other and that what make it so strong.Yes is that we are afraid to be rejected if we text back or do a call indirect.That why we try to touch the water before get in.
How appropriate that this has appeared right now! She comes and goes for months, plus I think she is triangulating.
I went to talk about reconciliation and my ex is all pissed off still 2 months later talking about how she DOESNT WANT TO GET BACK TOGETHER!! And stuff. When I never even brought up getting back together... wtf
How much time do you give them ? Its been 4 months apart, yes i did the begging and pleading for 2 months if not a bit longer. I speak to her every second week when I pick up the kids but not about anything special
Could you do a video on exs that are insecure(about themselves ) or current partners that are insecure. How do we notice or help them with their insecurities?
Omg 3:30 this just reminded me of our relationship, it was always her way or no way! Thank you for reminding me! My ego just wants her to reach out so i can reject her haha but i’m really doing some inner work to get over it
Hi Coach Craig and Margaret - I really like your videos!
I think the video ignores something that may possibly happen:
You are still waiting for your "stubborn" ex to contact you;
In the meantime, you have started to date someone new (and perhaps your ex has, too);
You may still miss your ex, and your ex may still miss you (and maybe he/she is in a rebound relationship);
A couple of months have passed and:
1. Either your ex is still missing you but they know you have someone new - so they won't reach out
2. OR by the time they reach out you are starting a new relationship - so how LONG should you wait...? Maybe if you hadn't started a new relationship they would have contacted you
3. OR your ex's so called "rebound" has helped them to forget you / your ex is doing everything to forget you even though they are missing you...they are basically fighting it.
What do you? You don't date? You let them fight themselves and forget you? You are dating someone but somehow insinuating to them that you want them to reach out?
Sometimes it's just complicated even though desire & love are so powerful...
What do you think?
I have begged and pleaded one time after breakup for a day. Then after a week I tried talking to her to give me another chance to which she completely denied but she asked me many time to remain friends with me to which I declined. And later after 2days she misbehaved with me and so we both ended up arguing. Then after 2 weeks I again contacted her to just remain like friends as she said me earlier but this time she herself declined to be friends and disrespected me and insulted me instead. After that I blocked her and I am no contact since then for 6weeks now. Will the previous conversations with her hamper my chances?
Great video you guys! Very insightful 😎😎👍
Hi Craig, wonderful video as always. Not directly related to stubbornness but could you do something on whether a person can switch attachment styles during a relationship. I feel this is what happened to me...
What if he’s stubborn and left you with someone else? Is there still hope on doing this? Please help 😢
Love This Video - Spot On!
Thank you, dear Coaches. I needed this tonight. ✨
I love you both!! You make me feel happy and positive.
You guy's are great I love you guys!! 💗
Latvian women are reeaaaaaly stoborn in this. They would prefer to keep silent and not reach out then to do something about it. They even accept worse future partners, just because they think that the previous relationship can not be fixed. So, they will not even bother themselves with such ideas like getting back together again.
Thank you Craig and aunt Mar you guys doing a good and soulful dead blessed you both.
Hi craig im from the philippines and i am always watching ur vid, i just want to know how long should i wait for them to reach out? Its been 9months now since my break up but still i havent hear from her
Hoping to schedule an email coaching next month. Have been watching your videos and not contacting him at all. He blocked me on FB. As hurtful as breakup was, he was the guy I developed the most attachment to with daily chats and he really helped me through my dad's brief illness and death in March. He has bipolar disorder and been divorced twice. So many things come into play. Definitely could use your input.
We broke up and initially were getting along just fine, she said she wanted to marry me when she got her shit together and stuff like that. Later she started saying I’d not given her space and we argued a lot. She would get pissy with me whenever I went out (we were still talking everyday) just like we used to, she told me she loved me a few times and kissed me a few times after we broke up before any of this happened but then she started saying all of our friends had told her I’d been talking crap about her and one day she told me she’d slept with another dude (I later found out the dude she slept with was the guy who was trying to get together with her before we started dating). She then changed her story and said she knows didn’t think that I’d said any crap about her. I kinda feel like she was just trying to mess with my head and didn’t know what she wanted.
Sounds like it. Insecure
does this apply for long distance?
Am I supposed to know what to do with this high, high level of accuracy?
great and insightful video.
It’s true!
My ex reached out three months after the break up. We set dates to hang out and She has a boyfriend now, I don’t know how to go about it. What should I do? Any advice would be great!
Just focus on having a good time, try to avoid any relationship talk. Try to reattract her in simple but not over bearing ways. Keep it light and keep it fun. After the date analyze the date and make a decision based on how you felt it went and what you think the best part going forward
It could be good! Its a position you probably have been waiting for. If it was me, as I went through this exact thing, when you originally met, was your ex in a relationship? Even if the relationship was on the way out? If not thats a positive for sure. If your ex was... Look into triangulation. Every situation is different. My ex as it turns out always had a foot in another place ( not cheating but having backup )
My ex of 5 years broke up with me. We had an amazing relationship, no complaints. I did NC for 2 1/2 months, she contacted me wanting to see my dog, so when I got back into town we met up and I asked her to bring my things back to me. Our meet up was great, but she did cry multiple times and the reason for her crying she said I make her emotional not because she’s mad or sad, but because she remembers all the good times we had. She also mentioned she unfollowed me on instagram because she saw me with another girl on my story. She also mentioned she stalks me everyday and watches all my stories still. She forgot my things so a few weeks later we met up again and it was another great time and she cried again and asked why I didn’t tell her happy birthday and if I forgot. She said she misses hanging out with me and my friends. When I text her she is very quick to reply. I am not sure what she is doing. She obviously misses me and loves me, but won’t initiate or admit she possibly wants me back. I am confused on what to do. Should I continue to allow her to watch my instagram stories? Or maybe cause paranoia by hiding my stories from her? I’m just so confused on what it is I need to do.
How did it end?😅
I just texted my ex gf of 14 yrs and told her I told like her ignoring me and she has broken my heart and I never want to speak to her again 🤣
hahaha i dent even like ice in my soda!! lol
What about if they have friends that they moved in with that are non stop talking mad crap about me and is constantly telling her to move on and to never come back to me? You know how friends are.
My situation is very peculiar My Ex broke up with me over the month of August... My Ex had health issues and stressed to the point she ended up in hospital! She has had heart issues all her life... BUT over a stressful incident (not my fault) she blamed me for it ALL and now even after 2 months she blames me and always brings her health issues up and absolutely HATES me... She hasn't blocked me on anything... I've been understanding and have been kind to her every time I've spoken to her... YET she still HATES ME and blames me for all her issues... We were together for 3 amazing months then she just broke me! I am hopeful to get her back one day! Just need advice on anything.
Thank you for this video.
what if my ex has already reached the stage of missing me and is making it so clear through his actions? however he says he has trouble forgetting all the bad memories tho he still misses and cares about me dearly. is there ever a chance for these memories to slowly be forgotten and for us to get back tgt and start afresh?
Tell him to take his time. DON'T tell him you've changed
😆 you are both so amazing Margaret and Craig. I’ve watched many of your clips .. good job guys . Can you make a video « after pulling away slowly with little to no contact, he or she broke up with me via TEXT!!! Is that a trend now guys To break up via texts and not in person ?
My ex cheated on me she said her feelings changed and she kept ignoring it, I am totally blindsided by this she seemed so love just the day before! We also share a home. Please help me I'm suffering
its been 3 months after the breakup, we kept talking for a while, then i started doing no contact and waiting for him to reach out, he texted me to tell me he will always love me and then he got cold, he reached again days later with an indirect direct approach and then i failed and contacted him we talked for a bit like we were still together but for moments he was cold, he told me that i should move with him to FL, and that made me fail the no contact, after that i contacted him again and it was a bad idea, he was cold and distant, we are supposed to video facetime on sunday but honestly i dont think it will be a good idea. Idk what to do, its been 3 months and i dont want to get stuck with a person that one day seems to be fine and the next day i feel like he doesnt want me in his life anymore. Help!
So get this I work with my ex of six months, who went into a relationship with someone else that also works there. They got together less than three months after we split. We were together four years this time, with a previous relationship together for eight years. She is ditzy, and was cluesless that we had a history. She must have found out, because she approached me today and said, "I hope I haven't done anything to make you hate me". She said she didn't know that he and I had been together. She was really nervous, rocking back and forth from one foot to another. I was as cool as a freaking cucumber (thank you Craig and Margaret!). I'm sure she will tell him she talked to me, and he will flip! She definitely has an anxious attachment style, and now that she knows about us...well...I hope she pushes him away. Wtf? Who does this? I'll be right over here.
I was dating a guy for almost a year, and I ended our "situationship" because he did not want for us to be exclusive, and I am becoming emotionally invested. But since the breakup, he is constantly "checking on me" every 2-3 weeks. I wasn't too eager for a conversation, nor rude, like what Craig said. Its been four months since we parted ways, and he does not initiate a meetup. Receiving miss calls, calling me by a nickname he gave me, asking me how was family etc.
I was telling myself that I should be stronger the next time this happens, but I keep on going back to 0 when he does that, I am still hoping that he would eventually change his mind on things, but he keeps breaking no contact.
Is he bored? Is he stubborn to admit? Is he confused? Mixed signals?
:( Help.
i try to be strong my ex is hot and cold i suppose u would say, calling me my pet names kissing if we see eachother telling me he still loves me then next day dont message me calling me by my proper name no kisses on texts, its messing my head up cuz im so in love with the guy, i was never allowed to say he was my bf even tho we were exclusive but he said cuz then it indicates it will lead somewhere :/ im trying to do no contact but i wasnt the one who did the breaking up so maybe its because u did it that hes acting that way
Hello Coach Craig! I have a quick question, my bf broke up with me a little over a week ago and just unfollowed me on Instagram last night. Do you think I should unfollow him back too? (even if I still want to get back with him)
my ex dumped me completely out of the blue and put up a new Facebook page with his ex-girlfriend on it! despite that the page said he is single. before his ex-girlfriend was on the page I saw the page and sent him a message asking him what was wrong and telling him that I'm worried about him. This was a month-and-a-half ago. I also called him once only to have him pretend to not know who I was despite that I was calling from my own phone number which he knew by heart, and then I said my name and he hung up on me. what a piece of crap. I have done nothing since. I have not contacted him in anyway. I was hoping he would at least come around and explain himself. instead, out of the blue again, he has now blocked me from messaging him on his new Facebook page to spite that I was not messaging him! I sent him the one message a month-and-a-half ago which he never read! It shows the message is unread even to this day and yet he blocked me from messaging him at all just a few days ago. why would someone block you from messaging them if you weren't messaging them? I thought maybe his ex-girlfriend put the whole page up herself and then she's doing this but of course he's not speaking to me and he pretended not to know who I was when I called and he is the one who hung up so I guess all this other stuff is him as well. Can you explain what this is?
Your ex is a narcissist. He enjoys your suffering. That’s what narcissists do.
How can my ex miss me, if he's been dating for almost 6 months?
There is a difference between missing the good times with someone, and missing you because they want to try again
My ex is so stubborn that after 4 month of NC she sends her mother for the rest of her stuff in the apt. her birthday being near, yeahh what a coincedence on puting me on some thought investment... what does she want... I dont know, what to do? some help please...it feels like,, hey Im hear, but in an aggresive way...help please..I love her and miss her so much... but I went on NC since day 1...not a single hi...is she pissed because of that? Is this her direct indirect approach, or this is her being pissed cause of the NC since day 1 not a single hi or begging or pleading..
No one can get into her head. Maybe she is mad you didn't try to chase or maybe she just wants to move on. Sending her mom to get her stuff isn't an indirect direct approach. An indirect direct approach is if she contacts you with some excuse like "can you give me the recipe for your chicken soup". It's random contact when the person doesn't want to come out and say "I miss you".
Yeahh what a coinscidene her birthday being near... its like no contact is fucking with her head so I must put this guy in some thought investment and see if he talks to me it really looks like that... I will go NC until the end...until she is humble enough to talk to me...I wasnt the best bf ever but she had attitude problems...if she wants her stuff well thats fine... everything she does has consecuences...and this pain and pride and anxiety and power struggle will not last for ever...that is the only certain thing I know...If she gets her stuff she will make it easier for me to keep moving forward.. . so on the long run probably she is doing a favour to me....I will only be this cool character watching the show with popcorn and never stop working on myself...If she wants my attention..she will have it being humble and peaceful...not making war like a spoiled bratt...
What if you are on good terms after 30 day. No contact and i have phyical , mentally abd pdycologically changed. I am happy at peace i have even been seeing a therapist and practicing being positive but they are in a rebound relationship. Will they ever come back???
So if my stubborn ex contacts me during no contact with an indirect direct message do I reply since that’s the best he can do?? We broke up bc he had a goal prior to dating to continue his education and career out of state. After a year of dating I asked for commitment (he had never asked me to be his gf) he said he couldn’t continue the relationship while out of state so I broke it off even though he had made no plans to leave yet.
Thsnk Craig for your knowledge.
I am so tired trying to get over this situation. My girlfriend break up two weeks ago and since then I decided not to talk with her (no contact) after I drop my last message that " i have given her the space she needs that she should contact me whenever she change her mind"... When I asked her the reason why she broke up then the only thing she could say is that "I am a good Christian, a kind and gentle guy, that we have so many differences that I love her more than she loves me" I really love my girlfriend and want her to come back to me. I am really confused. I wanted to call her this weekend to see what she have to say.
Please guys, what should I do?
You are anxious just like I was just after the breakup. It's only been two weeks. She needs time to miss you and to appreciate you for who you are. My ex liked that I was a Christian and many things about me but logic with her doesnt apply. She went from reasons of we have differences to we don't seem compatable to we dont seem natural together to she just wants to be alone and her latest... She's afraid I'm going to change who I am for her. I wish I could afford the coaching from Craig but my finance aren't good right now. I have learned a lot however in the last 2 months and am trying to engage in personal growth. Work on yourself. Keep watching the videos.
@Scott Nowakowski thanks so much. You said it all. I guess that is what she is exactly thinking about change. I couldn't afford the finance too. I just hope one day she realise and come back to me. I am on No contact for almost three weeks now. I told her in my last reply that she should work on her prefences. The videos have really helped me to know the necessities. Thanks so much. I really appreciate dude.
@@josefedu8595 No problem. I know it hurts a lot. Hang in there. Be strong. It will get better as time passes. You may be in a better position than me with 3 weeks compared to 3 months since my break up. Dont break the no contact.
@Scott Nowakowski thanks so much. I will keep to it. I really appreciate. Have a blissful weekend. 💖
You guys rock 😚
What about even after admitting i miss u , they disappear
I like a guy he likes me too but never express it n when i try to express he change the topic i dont want my love story to end before starting can u please suggest me something Sir
I’ve been watching a lot of these videos except none that I have found address the grieving partner. My boyfriend lost a parent and grandparent in a short span of time, became depressed, antisocial and a workaholic. Our relationship was great but it became too much for a new relationship to endure. Its been 30 days of no contact but I’m not sure if this is the right way or what else I can do?
Natalie Mendoza So what happened?
Thank you !!
Ur welcome
I already feel much better today with your reply like you were the guardian angel of relationships! I will smile for the rest of the day :)
On a Saturday? Yey
What if she broke up with me because I didn't make enough time for her will NC work?
Vince Garza yes because your other option is to chase! Dude your time is your time, if she wants more of what she can't have then she's obviously not respecting your wishes. No contact and if she reaches out then negotiations can resume! Don't compromise more of yourself than what's healthy for you!
Vince Garza please DO NOT LISTEN TO THE GUY ABOVE ME! If she broke up with you because she felt neglected and that you wasn’t giving her time why would you continue to not give her any attention and no time with nc? Does that even make sense? How about fixing what she said she’s unhappy with and trying to work it out? She didn’t break up with u because of your personality or anything, but the fact that she felt neglected which can be fixed without doing nc
Hi, are there people around here who want to talk and give advice about my situation?
Basicly my ex broke up like 2 months ago and we had our fights and chats after it, never worked out because we didnt had our rest period of course. So last weekend she called me on accident and I picked up my phone. We had a chat and after I texted her if she wanted to go for a walk. So in the end we met and we both were not sure if it would be good to meet but actual we had such a great time together that day. She told me that I changed so that was a nice achievement/compliment. After that I started talking a bit more about what happend and boom we kissed again. So after that we went to the station and said goodbye in a nice way.
Here it comes, she actual asked me "spontanious" if I want to go with her to France next weekend.
For me this sounds like the moment I was hoping for to happen.
I could use some guidance in this situation. Since we both mentioned we have missed each other and I would like to take this oppertunity the right way haha.
Temxion ' dude it sounds great in my opinion. Her interest sounds high again. Just be cool on your end and enjoy it! Keep watching videos on relationship maintenance, as you can move away from breakup therapy! Congratulations!
@@Danash2013 these are beautiful empowering words to me, thank you! I will watch those video's! Hopeful they will give me some extra power and confidence haha!
Staying cool is doable, I would do a lot to win her back. But I know I have fear of losing loved ones that could make it a bit harder.
Temxion ' Temxion ' watch Corey Wayne dude. Always gauge her attraction to you. You must be mindful that breakups can happen out of nowhere. You seem aware of your anxiety, so keep working on that. Keep her out of your personal growth, as that's for you! Also watch Craig's vids on being their mountain and being their superman, you can never let a woman move you off your emotional centre and core! Bon voyage!
@@Danash2013 it was a rollercoaster of emotions, which started beautiful and ended in a hell on earth. I am lost again and full of rejection.
@@temxion5800 what do you mean? What's happened man?
My ex broke up with me at the end of February. I respected his decision. We talked later and told me I broke up with him. Because of this I didn't feel right about doing a long NC. Each time I would write after waiting maybe 5 or 10 days. He always answers me with he misses me and twice sent pictures of red roses. And the last time a picture of a cupid. He has never written to me first. Should I start NC until he writes to me first? Is there a chance we will get back together?
What if your exes texts you every few days and says “just checking on you” how do you respond ??? Pls help
Don't respond.
You both are too cute!!!
Margaret, can we be friends?
3 weeks separated now. but he is daily texting me. he does random visits. he is saying he wants out but he is sending me mixed signals. is he just guilty for hurting me?
Please can anyone help me?
Can i come online or put a dp on what's app during no contact please tell me
I love who I am and won’t be a crostini puppet
You 2 R...The Best 😝😎😁
You guys got me 😂
Can I get my ex back after making him mad by begging & pleading? Or should I try to make my ex jealous with another guy?
Post pics with a guy you legit like.. Not to make an ex jealous.. "Moving on" is the only way to create value and attraction.. Don't go overboard though.. That's when it becomes obvious that you're trying to get someone's attention.
@J J If it's months later, it's fine. One can't assume jealousy if you're in NC beyond 3-4 months. Then that's just the exes insecurity. Can't wait around forever.