Hi J&J, loved the discussion about fetishes and wanted to offer a different perspective from someone with a fetish (spanking) and who is active in a fetish community. First, I think there is an important distinction between a kink and fetish, although the two often get used interchangeably even by fetishists. In short, kinks are usually wants and desires that fall outside "normal" sexual activity but aren't a necessity for one to feel fulfilled sexually. But fetishes are often required for one to feel sexually fulfilled and are often central to a person's sexuality. Some fetishist, such as the author Jillian Keenan, even argue that some fetishes, like spanking, are a type of sexual orientation due to their nature of being "innate, unchanging, and unchosen." I can't speak for all people with a fetish but I know for myself that I recognized from an early age (around 5 or 6) that I was interested in spanking. I've heard many other spankos (spanking fetishists) and even people with different fetishes (tickling, rope, diapers) similarly say that their interest started from an early age. On Jared's question about if women have fetishes, the answer is obviously yes! I'm sure there might be different gender ratios across different fetish groups. I think it seems like only men have fetishes because men tend to be the loudest. I also know from my own community women can be hesitant to advertise their fetish out of fear of getting swamped with unwanted male attention both within the spanking community and outside of it. Most men also tend to consume fetish porn more while most women with a fetish I've noticed tend to consume it through reading/writing erotica and fanfiction. On the community aspect, I understand a vanilla person being taken aback by the idea of a community or based around a sexual subject or activity. But I've found immense value in meeting other people who can relate to this part of my identity. Having a fetish can be lonely and isolating. I feel like every person with a fetish person has struggled with insecurity, shame, and a lack of belonging (I don't think I've meet anyone who isn't self-aware enough to recognize what they're into is a little weird). Having a community, whether online or offline, can bring a sense of belonging and normalcy that many crave. Additionally, it can also function as a form of safety, especially for women, to identify predators and problematic people. I'm not sure the emailer's boyfriend's reddit group necessarily serves all these functions, but I'd wager he definitely feels some self-guilt and hesitation to bring it up to the emailer (perhaps justifiably so based on her reaction), and probably finds some sense of belonging posting in the reddit as the only outlet for this fetish. Sorry for the novel, just felt inspired share!
This is one of the best RUclips comments I’ve ever read. Many great points. Learned something new. Disagreed without villainizing. If I could nominate this comment to the RUclips hall of fame, I would.
Jordana and Jared provide the MOST hilarious commentary all while being gentle and kind to a hopeless romantic “maybe we’re looking at the same mooooon”. 😂 LOVED this episode
What does it say about me that I would much rather watch this than the current news coverage? My guess is that I love the consistent and trustworthy content.
Just fyi: the sound was a bit echoy on this one. But that doesn't effect the content :D Loved the episode! "Sounds like you could move on and live a happy life with your husband - NOT SO FAST" xDDDD
Hey guys, just a heads up that the last two episodes haven't been added to the full episodes playlist which causes them to not show up on RUclips Music. Of course, I just came to RUclips to watch/listen anyway but just wanted to let you know.
![FNAF vs TF2 - Episode 2 [SFM]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/z5b3V2-VLb0/mqdefault.jpg)
Hi J&J, loved the discussion about fetishes and wanted to offer a different perspective from someone with a fetish (spanking) and who is active in a fetish community.
First, I think there is an important distinction between a kink and fetish, although the two often get used interchangeably even by fetishists. In short, kinks are usually wants and desires that fall outside "normal" sexual activity but aren't a necessity for one to feel fulfilled sexually. But fetishes are often required for one to feel sexually fulfilled and are often central to a person's sexuality. Some fetishist, such as the author Jillian Keenan, even argue that some fetishes, like spanking, are a type of sexual orientation due to their nature of being "innate, unchanging, and unchosen." I can't speak for all people with a fetish but I know for myself that I recognized from an early age (around 5 or 6) that I was interested in spanking. I've heard many other spankos (spanking fetishists) and even people with different fetishes (tickling, rope, diapers) similarly say that their interest started from an early age.
On Jared's question about if women have fetishes, the answer is obviously yes! I'm sure there might be different gender ratios across different fetish groups. I think it seems like only men have fetishes because men tend to be the loudest. I also know from my own community women can be hesitant to advertise their fetish out of fear of getting swamped with unwanted male attention both within the spanking community and outside of it. Most men also tend to consume fetish porn more while most women with a fetish I've noticed tend to consume it through reading/writing erotica and fanfiction.
On the community aspect, I understand a vanilla person being taken aback by the idea of a community or based around a sexual subject or activity. But I've found immense value in meeting other people who can relate to this part of my identity. Having a fetish can be lonely and isolating. I feel like every person with a fetish person has struggled with insecurity, shame, and a lack of belonging (I don't think I've meet anyone who isn't self-aware enough to recognize what they're into is a little weird). Having a community, whether online or offline, can bring a sense of belonging and normalcy that many crave. Additionally, it can also function as a form of safety, especially for women, to identify predators and problematic people. I'm not sure the emailer's boyfriend's reddit group necessarily serves all these functions, but I'd wager he definitely feels some self-guilt and hesitation to bring it up to the emailer (perhaps justifiably so based on her reaction), and probably finds some sense of belonging posting in the reddit as the only outlet for this fetish.
Sorry for the novel, just felt inspired share!
This is one of the best RUclips comments I’ve ever read. Many great points. Learned something new. Disagreed without villainizing. If I could nominate this comment to the RUclips hall of fame, I would.
@@jaredfreid Aw damn thank you!
You said this much more eloquently than me. I was just going to say that yes women also have fetishes.
Jordana and Jared provide the MOST hilarious commentary all while being gentle and kind to a hopeless romantic “maybe we’re looking at the same mooooon”. 😂 LOVED this episode
I LOLED so hard :D
The moon joke!! That killed me 😂😂😂😂
What does it say about me that I would much rather watch this than the current news coverage? My guess is that I love the consistent and trustworthy content.
This is a fun one
I must stop listening to your show at the gym - I randomly burst out laughing and someone may think I’m laughing at them. This pod is 10/10 🥇
Moving to a new city sounds really fun. Nashville would welcome Jared and his hat!
And his hat 🤣
Felt this writer it’s hard to admit your part to play in a toxic relationship and love the feedback to go back to therapy to heal
Please do the auction and donate to charity. It would be so funny!
Just fyi: the sound was a bit echoy on this one. But that doesn't effect the content :D Loved the episode!
"Sounds like you could move on and live a happy life with your husband - NOT SO FAST" xDDDD
thanks for letting us know so I can flag that note to the team!
I fell bad for her husband. Responding to an exes e-mail and telling him "I'll always love you". WTF is that lol She's not over that guy.
I love this Jared lmao Sell everything & Go to San Fran !
Hey guys, just a heads up that the last two episodes haven't been added to the full episodes playlist which causes them to not show up on RUclips Music. Of course, I just came to RUclips to watch/listen anyway but just wanted to let you know.
Thanks for the heads up!
Jared loves sf so much, fall there!!
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