Exactly what I’m thinking. She wouldn’t have snapped from one comment. And I couldn’t help but feel that maybe the dad has been comparing Ann with his late wife this whole time if this is how the teenagers talk to her. 10 years is such a long time to NOT build that relationship with Ann
I can’t believe the dad just let this go on happening. He was completely okay with having his wife feel less than, actually thinking she is. Then he gets surprised when she agreeing to a divorce when he threatened her with one? What a fool.
Before the plate smash, OP complained that his wife was no longer worked to keep late wife's memory alive on Mother's Day, Christmas, or late wife's 40th birthday. This woman died when the girls were 2 and 4. They have been in a constant state of grieving for a woman they barely knew. It's important to keep photos and share memories of loved ones past, but OP and MIL have forced their grief on these girls to the detriment of the mother figure they had.
tbf i think that the reason why ann lost her cool is because she's been listening to the same sort of crap grandma's been saying for a decade, and for a decade no one ever stood up for ann. Because there's no way that what grandma was saying wasn't meant to be a dig at ann. 10 years of 'oh the poor girls have lost their mother and are forced to raise themselves all on their own because there is no one there for them.' in ann's face as she does everything for them, must've been like a punch to the face.
I've heard this before. OP is an enormous failure. Daughter pregnant daughter at 16. Teen pregnancy is not cure, 14 and 16 is plenty old to cook for themselves. She's not their mother, so she's not going to act like that. The girls are to blame, but OP is more to blame. He's a terrible man who raised terrible children. I hope the wife gets full custody of her boys and can go NC with this horrible family. My husband ever calls me a b, that's grounds for divorce on its own. Do not call me out of my name. His wife honored his late wife and was a good mom without trying to replace the deceased. She deserves so much better than these horrid people. They have too much nerve
Honestly, I think the Dad in this scenario is the biggest a hole. Between him, and his deceased wife’s mother they are perpetuating this situation by keeping the girls in a constant state of grief. I mean it doesn’t seem like they have tried to heal from the girls mother, passing away when they were young. this man has been married to the new wife for 10 years and Met her before that. This means these girls were only maybe two and four when the current wife came into their life. It’s terrible to lose a mom especially when the girls were very young. However, their father has done a huge disservice by not allowing the girls to move through the grief process, and build a closer relationship with the new wife. I’m sure the new wife never tried to become the only mom or erase the fact that the girls mom passed away but by continuously, focusing on the deceased wife and not fostering relationship with the new wife and the girls left them in this extremely charged and toxic bubble. You will never get over losing your mom. the way this father handled it has made it way worse. The current wife needs to divorce this man and he needs to check himself into intensive therapy maybe even like an inpatient mental health facility along with those two girls. This entire situation is horribly sad.
100% with you. He sat back and watched the family relationships deteriorate for YEARS and only now that it is inconvenient for him does he bother to step in at all or suggest counseling (which it sounds like it is far too late for)
Wow. Imagine a step mom having to keep the old Mom's memory alive? Also screw those kids. The kid is 16 and going to be a Mom herself. Good for Anna leaving. They have been married for 10 years. That means she has been there since they were 4 &6. Their Mom died when they were 2 and 4. Literally she is the only Mom these kids have known. They deserve it. Good for Anna leaving.
This had to be going on for years for Anne to snap, plus the girls said they wished she had died instead of their “real” mom. She may not have been their biological mom, but for all intents and purposes, she was their real mom for the majority of their lives. To be treated as a second citizen in her own home, and then the hubby calling her names. I think she’s right to leave, it won’t get any better for her there.
OP is the AH. He really thought calling his wife out of her name when she was already done after the girls made it clear how they felt about her after a decade was the right move and is shocked that she gave him back the ring. Don't threaten her with a good time. I don't see how OP can make things right when so many lines were crossed.
I think you’re missing it. He said that the wife did not go with them to celebrate deceased mom‘s birthday. What do they do for her birthday? They celebrate dead mom on Mother’s Day. What do they do for Anne on Mother’s Day? I think there’s a whole lot more to this than just her overreacting. Former mother-in-law I’m sure has been getting digs in since the day she met her husband is selfish and oblivious Good on you Anne for giving your ring back and moving on
It is the girls fault. They said what they said and felt absolutely ok doing it. That shows their father supported that type of behavior out of them all along. He is more worried about keeping the dead mother/wife alive. Why should the new wife be part of the dead persons 40th birthday celebration? Hope hubby has a great life with his pregnant teen and dead wife. Anne is long gone and good for her.
Ann having to constant butt heads with dead wife's family is just beyond the pale. Especially if OP never stood up for Ann (his wife) to them. Seems like he just rolls with whatever crap they want to dump on Ann and wants her to roll over and take it. Do not blame her one bit for anything she did. She has to look out for herself and her two kids. I hope she divorces his ass and sticks him for child support and limited visitation - with a stipulation that the two boys NEVER have to be around the dead wife's toxic family (I mean, they are not related at all and have no reason to see them - ever!). Agree with another comment here: the girls are old enough to cook and be responsible for themselves. Hell, the 16 year-old is going to be responsible for another life in a few months - she best get her crap together!
OP is a major AH. Kids are equally horrible. I don't blame Anne at all for this. She wasn't acting like a child. She gave them the relationship they wanted. She was disrespected not only by the kids, but by OP, and his former in-laws. The only thing I would have done differently is tell them i'd cancelled the gender reveal so they'd see how much work she actually had done for it
OP delete his post. There was a lovely commenter that grabbed some of his reply’s. He doubled down in his comments. Anne, I hope you find peace in your life and feel lighter now you are not being abused.
Typically the OP of these posts try to make themself sound better in the situation and the other person/people sound like the villain, but even with that, Ann still sounds like a saint. Just how long has this been going on that she just cracked almost violently? I honestly hope Ann files for divorce because OP doesn't deserve her. From what it sounds like, he hasn't supported her one bit and just let this verbal and emotional harassment happen in the background, and then proceeded to get mad at her when she was giving his daughters exactly what they wanted instead of disciplining them.
Soooo OP tells his wife to f off and she does exactly what they asked for and now they're mad at her? 😂 That's rich. She's not the A hole. She was told her many years of contributions meant nothing cause hubby is always comparing her or putting deceased wife on a pedestal. No offense. Wife is dead. She's dead. Honor her and move on. But you don't get to be mad when you say extremely hurtful and malicious things to current wife and expect her to keep people doing things. This has happened many times. You can tell by her reaction. If OP can't move past his grief and build a life with the current wife then he needs to end things. However he's dragging his kid through constant replaying grief cause he doesn't want to let go. It's not fair to the current wife.
Ohhhh wait until that baby starts waking Rose up every two hours ALLLLLL night. Well okay, I hate it when the final straw reaches the camels back and the person who overloaded that camel are like “I’m SoRrY I wAnT tO TaKe It BaCk!” Did it ever occur to OP that his late wife’s family is stirring the pot on purpose? Maybe they didn’t like the fact that he got remarried and they’re going out of their way to alienate Ann and actively encouraging the girls to do the same. Really look at what happened here: they gave a pregnant teenage girl this spiel about “I’m so sad you had to grow up and go through your first pregnancy without a Mom” with the woman who raised her and is planning and paying for her baby shower standing there. They acted like Ann didn’t have ears and hasn’t lifted a finger for that brat. THAT is a mind game if I ever saw one.
Why did op not sit everyone down? It is so disrespectfull what happened and his wife was clearly waiting for back up and all she got was more disrespect. I get grandma wanted her daughter there. Losing a child is the worst pain. But dad should have stepped in!!
The daughters wanted their cake and to eat it too. They didnt want her to mother then but wanted her to mother them. Sorry but the wife is not an ass hole, she gave them exactly what they wanted and the girls *SHOULD* feel guilty because they *ARE* guilty...
Mathing: OP met 2nd wife two years after 1st wife, been married for ten this second time. Youngest child from first marriage could be no older than 2, so older daughter was no more than 4. I.E. - 2nd mother has been there for literally EVERYTHING for these two girls for their whole known lives. I can't figure out for the life of me WHY husband has ingrained his first wife's memory into two children who could never know her. I have strong suspicions that FORMER in laws have been pushing and pushing this whole time for the better part of a decade to force the pain of loss onto children who would probably never have understood otherwise in order to keep some semblance of their late child/sister alive, and OP crap dad here has been just that - crap. Unsupportive, blaming everything on his second wife, not drawing lines in the sand and boundaries with late wife's family that should have been there from the get-go.
The update I saw in Reddit comments said that after a week the eldest daughter wrote an apology letter so did her sister a few days later. She didn't open them left them on the bed side table unopened and basically told them all to f off and tapped out.
The father is thd one who keep the wound open, he keep his children thinking sbout their real mother as be sacracent and never gave Anne the creidit for what she has done for his children shows he doesn't respect what she has done. Then he put the same message in words.
It's lovely to remember their Mum,but why every birthday, Christmas anniversary etc. Don't think that's helpful for the girls,. I'm a mum and I would love to think of anything happened to me,I'd love someone like Ann to take care of them.
ESH Grandmother is a 1 OP is 2 or 1 depending on how controlling she is, also sounds like he might be prolonging his family's grief but we don't know how much of that is grandmonster . Stepmother 3 or 2 depending on how hard she pushes the daughters boundaries you don't get to ignore a kids feelings about the fact that they lost a parent, or be that petty to children. The girls are either brainwashed or currying favor with grandmonster. The only people in this family who might be okay are the boys, who are probably watching this mess with popcorn or traumatized.
I get the hurt, but also know that teenage girls that are biological yours will also say mean shit like that. I took in my niece when she was a teenager and she sure as hell didn't have one problem saying stuff like "I didn't ask you to do the things you do for me" or my favorite "that's why I like grandma better than you". I have been taking care of this girl since she was 6 and her mom passed. I moved her in with me at 15, when she had a big blow up with her dad. And after all the stuff I had done and continued to she had no problem telling to my that she didn't care and I she like my mom that wanted her to stay with her abusive dad to keep the peace, better? I was hurt and pissed and we raged, but not once did I stop doing the things she needed as a parent, because that's not what parenting is about. We talked, we got therapy, she got older and wiser, she apologized for being a brat. She is 21 now and are relationship is great now. Once you make the choice to be a mom to kid you don't get to stop because they are assholes to you. The girl was 16 and pregnant, baby daddy dumped her, and her grandma just brought up her dead mom. My niece freaks out emotionally when people bring up her dead mom too. So yeah, it sucked, but it's not surprising the girl lashed out, it wasn't fair, it was mean, she needs to apologize and they need therapy. When I took in my niece and everything I had learned about child rising kids with trauma and issues it is normal for them to lash out like that. If she was 20, sure quit trying to parent, but a 16 year old high on pregnancy hormones doesn't mean what she says. And it was only the oldest one that said what she said, the stepmom took her hurt out of the 14 year old that didn't say anything hurtful. That's how you know the stepmom is taking it too far. The dad shouldn't call her a bitch that's never okay. He needed to put himself in her shoes. And that grandma was out of line. But to not try to talk it with the girls she claims she loved like her own, is petty. Again a real parent doesn't get to stop being a parent because their kids is an asshole. My friend's young son has called her all kinds of things and hit her, she is still being a parent. Not all kids are easy, sweet, well mattered. Now it's possible because this from the dad's prospective he hasn't been seeing the cracks, how hard his girls and the grandma had been on his wife. But it's also possible that hearing, you're not my mom and everything you ever done doesn't matter just cut too deep and if that's the case, while she's not the asshole for being that hurt. She is also not the mom to them she claims, if she can just turn it off like that. You call me a bitch, I'm leaving your ass too. She's not wrong for leaving him, though.
ESH! Except for the two young boys of course. IMO the single biggest mistake a stepparent can make is to try to take the place of an actual parent, whether deceased or divorced. That being said, it sounds like up to this point Ann was doing a good job of helping to raise the girls. But then the deceased wife's family coming in and telling Molly how hard it must be without her mother, totally ignoring Ann's contributions over the years and the two girls telling Ann off that she's not their mother is simply a disaster! And OP, what exactly were you doing/saying, because it doesn't sound like you tried to mediate and calm things down at all? While I think Ann may have gone too far in not doing the everyday things like fixing breakfast and especially in calling off the gender reveal party, can you really blame her? And then to accuse her of all things so she left? I would suggest you and the girls get to therapy and I hope you gent get Ann to join you. I would also suggest you explain to your deceased wife's family that they stop making digs at Ann and her contributions to your girls. What a hot mess, sheesh!
They were literally 2 and 4 when their Mom died. How isn't she their Mom? She apparently has to go and celebrate the dead Mom and keep her memory alive and even the Dead Moms family and him push her out. Why should they have so much involvement?
@@kellharris2491 I agree with you on that. In every way except biologically she is their mother. But it get the feeling grandma and aunt have been filling their heads that Ann is not the mom and dad hasn't stopped it.
Erm Ops kids need a huge lesson in manners at base point, OP is a dick because he has allowed the wall to build by deceased wife's family its ok to remember her but attending a would be 40th birthday party for a dead person is effing weird. GOOD FOR YOU ANNE go be happy and appreciated 👏
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They’re only sorry because their servant, who they also planned to use as a full time carer for the new baby, is no longer around to do all the work.
I wonder how many comments like this have happened behind the scene before Ann finally broke. 😢
Exactly what I’m thinking. She wouldn’t have snapped from one comment. And I couldn’t help but feel that maybe the dad has been comparing Ann with his late wife this whole time if this is how the teenagers talk to her. 10 years is such a long time to NOT build that relationship with Ann
Why are the girls crying? Ann is 'staying in her lane'.
And since the 16 years old is apparently old enough to be a mom, she better act like an adult now.
I can’t believe the dad just let this go on happening. He was completely okay with having his wife feel less than, actually thinking she is. Then he gets surprised when she agreeing to a divorce when he threatened her with one? What a fool.
Before the plate smash, OP complained that his wife was no longer worked to keep late wife's memory alive on Mother's Day, Christmas, or late wife's 40th birthday. This woman died when the girls were 2 and 4. They have been in a constant state of grieving for a woman they barely knew. It's important to keep photos and share memories of loved ones past, but OP and MIL have forced their grief on these girls to the detriment of the mother figure they had.
tbf i think that the reason why ann lost her cool is because she's been listening to the same sort of crap grandma's been saying for a decade, and for a decade no one ever stood up for ann. Because there's no way that what grandma was saying wasn't meant to be a dig at ann. 10 years of 'oh the poor girls have lost their mother and are forced to raise themselves all on their own because there is no one there for them.' in ann's face as she does everything for them, must've been like a punch to the face.
I've heard this before. OP is an enormous failure. Daughter pregnant daughter at 16. Teen pregnancy is not cure, 14 and 16 is plenty old to cook for themselves. She's not their mother, so she's not going to act like that. The girls are to blame, but OP is more to blame. He's a terrible man who raised terrible children. I hope the wife gets full custody of her boys and can go NC with this horrible family. My husband ever calls me a b, that's grounds for divorce on its own. Do not call me out of my name. His wife honored his late wife and was a good mom without trying to replace the deceased. She deserves so much better than these horrid people. They have too much nerve
Honestly, I think the Dad in this scenario is the biggest a hole. Between him, and his deceased wife’s mother they are perpetuating this situation by keeping the girls in a constant state of grief. I mean it doesn’t seem like they have tried to heal from the girls mother, passing away when they were young. this man has been married to the new wife for 10 years and Met her before that. This means these girls were only maybe two and four when the current wife came into their life. It’s terrible to lose a mom especially when the girls were very young. However, their father has done a huge disservice by not allowing the girls to move through the grief process, and build a closer relationship with the new wife. I’m sure the new wife never tried to become the only mom or erase the fact that the girls mom passed away but by continuously, focusing on the deceased wife and not fostering relationship with the new wife and the girls left them in this extremely charged and toxic bubble. You will never get over losing your mom. the way this father handled it has made it way worse. The current wife needs to divorce this man and he needs to check himself into intensive therapy maybe even like an inpatient mental health facility along with those two girls. This entire situation is horribly sad.
100% with you. He sat back and watched the family relationships deteriorate for YEARS and only now that it is inconvenient for him does he bother to step in at all or suggest counseling (which it sounds like it is far too late for)
Good point
Let me file those papers now
Wow. Imagine a step mom having to keep the old Mom's memory alive? Also screw those kids. The kid is 16 and going to be a Mom herself. Good for Anna leaving. They have been married for 10 years. That means she has been there since they were 4 &6. Their Mom died when they were 2 and 4. Literally she is the only Mom these kids have known. They deserve it. Good for Anna leaving.
You're right, that lashing out didn't come out of nowhere
This had to be going on for years for Anne to snap, plus the girls said they wished she had died instead of their “real” mom. She may not have been their biological mom, but for all intents and purposes, she was their real mom for the majority of their lives. To be treated as a second citizen in her own home, and then the hubby calling her names. I think she’s right to leave, it won’t get any better for her there.
Yes OP is the A hole! They treated that woman as a maid took all she did then dismissed her. That was really trash behavior
OP is the AH. He really thought calling his wife out of her name when she was already done after the girls made it clear how they felt about her after a decade was the right move and is shocked that she gave him back the ring. Don't threaten her with a good time. I don't see how OP can make things right when so many lines were crossed.
I think you’re missing it. He said that the wife did not go with them to celebrate deceased mom‘s birthday. What do they do for her birthday? They celebrate dead mom on Mother’s Day. What do they do for Anne on Mother’s Day? I think there’s a whole lot more to this than just her overreacting. Former mother-in-law I’m sure has been getting digs in since the day she met her husband is selfish and oblivious Good on you Anne for giving your ring back and moving on
OP's audacity is insane
It is the girls fault. They said what they said and felt absolutely ok doing it. That shows their father supported that type of behavior out of them all along. He is more worried about keeping the dead mother/wife alive. Why should the new wife be part of the dead persons 40th birthday celebration? Hope hubby has a great life with his pregnant teen and dead wife. Anne is long gone and good for her.
Ann having to constant butt heads with dead wife's family is just beyond the pale. Especially if OP never stood up for Ann (his wife) to them. Seems like he just rolls with whatever crap they want to dump on Ann and wants her to roll over and take it. Do not blame her one bit for anything she did. She has to look out for herself and her two kids. I hope she divorces his ass and sticks him for child support and limited visitation - with a stipulation that the two boys NEVER have to be around the dead wife's toxic family (I mean, they are not related at all and have no reason to see them - ever!). Agree with another comment here: the girls are old enough to cook and be responsible for themselves. Hell, the 16 year-old is going to be responsible for another life in a few months - she best get her crap together!
Dads the biggest AH. I mean its definitely petty. But sometimes people need alittle petty. Id do the same thing honeslty. Screw him.
It is the 16 year Olds falt! She screemed at her so she's done
Not enough discussion about how Rose is 16 and pregnant. Oh. Mah. Gosh.
OP is a major AH. Kids are equally horrible. I don't blame Anne at all for this. She wasn't acting like a child. She gave them the relationship they wanted. She was disrespected not only by the kids, but by OP, and his former in-laws. The only thing I would have done differently is tell them i'd cancelled the gender reveal so they'd see how much work she actually had done for it
OP delete his post. There was a lovely commenter that grabbed some of his reply’s. He doubled down in his comments.
Anne, I hope you find peace in your life and feel lighter now you are not being abused.
Typically the OP of these posts try to make themself sound better in the situation and the other person/people sound like the villain, but even with that, Ann still sounds like a saint. Just how long has this been going on that she just cracked almost violently? I honestly hope Ann files for divorce because OP doesn't deserve her. From what it sounds like, he hasn't supported her one bit and just let this verbal and emotional harassment happen in the background, and then proceeded to get mad at her when she was giving his daughters exactly what they wanted instead of disciplining them.
Soooo OP tells his wife to f off and she does exactly what they asked for and now they're mad at her? 😂 That's rich. She's not the A hole. She was told her many years of contributions meant nothing cause hubby is always comparing her or putting deceased wife on a pedestal.
No offense. Wife is dead. She's dead. Honor her and move on. But you don't get to be mad when you say extremely hurtful and malicious things to current wife and expect her to keep people doing things. This has happened many times. You can tell by her reaction. If OP can't move past his grief and build a life with the current wife then he needs to end things. However he's dragging his kid through constant replaying grief cause he doesn't want to let go. It's not fair to the current wife.
I know it doesn't apply to this story, but can we get a female brozo award? Maybe a Mrs. Bizznatch or something?!
The Bitchbiscuit award!😂
oooooh I like that one!
Ohhhh wait until that baby starts waking Rose up every two hours ALLLLLL night.
Well okay, I hate it when the final straw reaches the camels back and the person who overloaded that camel are like “I’m SoRrY I wAnT tO TaKe It BaCk!”
Did it ever occur to OP that his late wife’s family is stirring the pot on purpose? Maybe they didn’t like the fact that he got remarried and they’re going out of their way to alienate Ann and actively encouraging the girls to do the same.
Really look at what happened here: they gave a pregnant teenage girl this spiel about “I’m so sad you had to grow up and go through your first pregnancy without a Mom” with the woman who raised her and is planning and paying for her baby shower standing there. They acted like Ann didn’t have ears and hasn’t lifted a finger for that brat. THAT is a mind game if I ever saw one.
Why did op not sit everyone down? It is so disrespectfull what happened and his wife was clearly waiting for back up and all she got was more disrespect. I get grandma wanted her daughter there. Losing a child is the worst pain. But dad should have stepped in!!
The daughters wanted their cake and to eat it too. They didnt want her to mother then but wanted her to mother them.
Sorry but the wife is not an ass hole, she gave them exactly what they wanted and the girls *SHOULD* feel guilty because they *ARE* guilty...
OP’s wife is great.
I love the petty, it was completely warranted.
Good for her.
Mathing: OP met 2nd wife two years after 1st wife, been married for ten this second time. Youngest child from first marriage could be no older than 2, so older daughter was no more than 4. I.E. - 2nd mother has been there for literally EVERYTHING for these two girls for their whole known lives.
I can't figure out for the life of me WHY husband has ingrained his first wife's memory into two children who could never know her. I have strong suspicions that FORMER in laws have been pushing and pushing this whole time for the better part of a decade to force the pain of loss onto children who would probably never have understood otherwise in order to keep some semblance of their late child/sister alive, and OP crap dad here has been just that - crap. Unsupportive, blaming everything on his second wife, not drawing lines in the sand and boundaries with late wife's family that should have been there from the get-go.
Praise? She just wanted kindness and respect?
Listen to your wife, Dusty… she is 100% right!
The update I saw in Reddit comments said that after a week the eldest daughter wrote an apology letter so did her sister a few days later. She didn't open them left them on the bed side table unopened and basically told them all to f off and tapped out.
Why I would never be a step parent
yes, you are
May have gotten the girl's name reversed.
You know OP left out, that his mom has probably been doing this for a while, and he has probably been defending his mother the whole time.
The father is thd one who keep the wound open, he keep his children thinking sbout their real mother as be sacracent and never gave Anne the creidit for what she has done for his children shows he doesn't respect what she has done. Then he put the same message in words.
I agree with the woman. Having kids is hard I can imagne. So yeah 😂 she is not their mom so yeah dad can pick up the slack now.
OP deleted their post lmao
It's lovely to remember their Mum,but why every birthday, Christmas anniversary etc. Don't think that's helpful for the girls,. I'm a mum and I would love to think of anything happened to me,I'd love someone like Ann to take care of them.
The wife’s pov is wild.
100% ascon 1
UPDATEEEEE.
He deleted his post. I was hoping Ann made one
Take on all the responsibilities to the girls but don’t get the title or respect. Take the girls and mil abuse or I’ll divorce you …wow op yta
ESH Grandmother is a 1 OP is 2 or 1 depending on how controlling she is, also sounds like he might be prolonging his family's grief but we don't know how much of that is grandmonster . Stepmother 3 or 2 depending on how hard she pushes the daughters boundaries you don't get to ignore a kids feelings about the fact that they lost a parent, or be that petty to children. The girls are either brainwashed or currying favor with grandmonster. The only people in this family who might be okay are the boys, who are probably watching this mess with popcorn or traumatized.
💚
I get the hurt, but also know that teenage girls that are biological yours will also say mean shit like that. I took in my niece when she was a teenager and she sure as hell didn't have one problem saying stuff like "I didn't ask you to do the things you do for me" or my favorite "that's why I like grandma better than you". I have been taking care of this girl since she was 6 and her mom passed. I moved her in with me at 15, when she had a big blow up with her dad. And after all the stuff I had done and continued to she had no problem telling to my that she didn't care and I she like my mom that wanted her to stay with her abusive dad to keep the peace, better?
I was hurt and pissed and we raged, but not once did I stop doing the things she needed as a parent, because that's not what parenting is about. We talked, we got therapy, she got older and wiser, she apologized for being a brat. She is 21 now and are relationship is great now. Once you make the choice to be a mom to kid you don't get to stop because they are assholes to you. The girl was 16 and pregnant, baby daddy dumped her, and her grandma just brought up her dead mom. My niece freaks out emotionally when people bring up her dead mom too. So yeah, it sucked, but it's not surprising the girl lashed out, it wasn't fair, it was mean, she needs to apologize and they need therapy.
When I took in my niece and everything I had learned about child rising kids with trauma and issues it is normal for them to lash out like that. If she was 20, sure quit trying to parent, but a 16 year old high on pregnancy hormones doesn't mean what she says. And it was only the oldest one that said what she said, the stepmom took her hurt out of the 14 year old that didn't say anything hurtful. That's how you know the stepmom is taking it too far.
The dad shouldn't call her a bitch that's never okay. He needed to put himself in her shoes. And that grandma was out of line. But to not try to talk it with the girls she claims she loved like her own, is petty. Again a real parent doesn't get to stop being a parent because their kids is an asshole. My friend's young son has called her all kinds of things and hit her, she is still being a parent. Not all kids are easy, sweet, well mattered.
Now it's possible because this from the dad's prospective he hasn't been seeing the cracks, how hard his girls and the grandma had been on his wife. But it's also possible that hearing, you're not my mom and everything you ever done doesn't matter just cut too deep and if that's the case, while she's not the asshole for being that hurt. She is also not the mom to them she claims, if she can just turn it off like that. You call me a bitch, I'm leaving your ass too. She's not wrong for leaving him, though.
ESH! Except for the two young boys of course. IMO the single biggest mistake a stepparent can make is to try to take the place of an actual parent, whether deceased or divorced. That being said, it sounds like up to this point Ann was doing a good job of helping to raise the girls. But then the deceased wife's family coming in and telling Molly how hard it must be without her mother, totally ignoring Ann's contributions over the years and the two girls telling Ann off that she's not their mother is simply a disaster! And OP, what exactly were you doing/saying, because it doesn't sound like you tried to mediate and calm things down at all? While I think Ann may have gone too far in not doing the everyday things like fixing breakfast and especially in calling off the gender reveal party, can you really blame her? And then to accuse her of all things so she left? I would suggest you and the girls get to therapy and I hope you gent get Ann to join you. I would also suggest you explain to your deceased wife's family that they stop making digs at Ann and her contributions to your girls. What a hot mess, sheesh!
They were literally 2 and 4 when their Mom died. How isn't she their Mom? She apparently has to go and celebrate the dead Mom and keep her memory alive and even the Dead Moms family and him push her out. Why should they have so much involvement?
@@kellharris2491 I agree with you on that. In every way except biologically she is their mother. But it get the feeling grandma and aunt have been filling their heads that Ann is not the mom and dad hasn't stopped it.
Everyone but Ann sucks here
Erm Ops kids need a huge lesson in manners at base point, OP is a dick because he has allowed the wall to build by deceased wife's family its ok to remember her but attending a would be 40th birthday party for a dead person is effing weird. GOOD FOR YOU ANNE go be happy and appreciated 👏