Listen to what this man says. It's all true. My ex came back after 6 months, but she hasnt changed at all and ive made immense self worth growth. I have tons of options now, she doesnt. She gave me closure and we met up, had a great time. But it was me who realizes we wouldnt work out, even though she told me she loved me. I cant go through the same discarded breakup again. Remember, if nothing changes....nothing changes. Keep your head up Kings, work on yourself. Pour that love you poured into her back when you were together, and pour it back into you. It should always be poured into you first. Your queen will come.
Coach black ! My ex just called last night at 3 am from almost 3 weeks of no contact. I listened and focused on myself and sharing that with social media and she reached out. She asked me to come over and talk and we both wanted more in the moment but decided on starting from the beginning and going slow. Words can’t describe how much I thank you. Keep your head up people, I at one point lost all hope too.
Psa, she reached out right when i was about to be fine with the fact she was gone. Once you realize your worth and can be fine with what happened , they always come back
I fucked up continue sleeping with him making him think it was okay to juggle me until i learned no contact now im doing no contact im getting crumbs he watches me stalks my social media and call or text but i dont answer doing everything to get my attention at first i was responding now im learning doing it for 30 days im 2 weeks in its so hard but we have 3 kids and been together 10 years and yes i want him back but what he is doing is not ok@@blacademic
Sometimes you just need to know you ok without them and no matter what happens you will be fine and that can take time. Acceptance is key. express yourself once and always let the person know there are no hard feelings you are just expressing the way you feel. Don't chase be ok no matter whT happens. Find things new to look forward to.
These “dumpers” are wild. You have to stay ready so you don’t have to get ready….they’ll throw everything they can to get your attention. Good thing I have my blinders on. 😎☺️
Yeahhhhhh…..same. My sister was following mine on Instagram for a while after we broke up (I don’t have any social media) and said she was celebrating 24hrs after dumping me, posting all this shit about how she was “liberated” and “free” and “facing her demons” and various other cliche stuff, to the point that my sister was even like “what did you do to her? Was your guys breakup ugly?” My ex discarded me 48 hours after the greatest night of our time together, lamenting about how no man ever treated her as well as I did and that the night we had together, seeing her fav band before they broke up, was “one of the greatest nights of her life.” Yet my ex out here posting like she dumped Jeffrey Dahmer and it really just goes to show her lack of emotional maturity. I was really, really sad for the first two weeks after she left because she offered ZERO closure and wouldn’t even do it to my face (despite ME always being the calm, levelheaded one between us). The more time I’ve spent in no contact with her (coming up in a month in the next few days), the more I realize that I really did put her on a pedestal and I’ve concluded that she’s a 32 year old Woman with the emotional maturity of a teenager. 32 years old, never been fired or let go from a job, never been dumped, never really faced any sort of rejection in general. She is EXTREMELY attractive, like a combo of Angelina Jolie and Scar Jo, tall, athletic, the most gorgeous green eyes I’ve ever seen and she’s smart too and grew up in an extremely wealthy household to boot. Rejection is SUCH a powerful tool if you can harness the negative energy and turn it into positivity. The key here is to not fall into the trap of self destructive behavior. Since we broke up, I haven’t had any alcohol, I’ve rekindled several old friendships and even went back to some old hobbies I’ve neglected over the years, I’ve finished reading 3 books, and I’ve been destroying my gym goals. I honestly don’t know if I’d even take her back if she asked, but it doesn’t matter because I’ve already told myself she’s never coming back and I’m not allowed to contact her either and I think her ego will keep her from contacting me as well
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really loved him so much I can’t stop thinking about him, I’ve tried my very best to get him back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of him, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss him and just can’t stop thinking about him
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
I understand you. I´m in the same position right now. I can tell you, that you have to move on, you have to find yourself and self worth and if it´´s meant to be, than he will come back. Trust the Universe. I will try the same now after he dumped me again yesterday after we were back together not even one week ago.
Mia, Don't contact him for 3 months...then get in touch..go out for dinner..dress sexy...treat him like a friend and be cold n distant...leave your dinner date early...go home n never contact him...trust me he will call you n ask you out again n he will ask your hand shortly after that😉
Hey Coach after 50 days or so of no contact I’ve got to a stage where I’d be okay if they don’t come back and I can move on, but I’m still here watching the videos for the lessons, thank you brother
In my situation I lived about 80 miles apart from my ex. Been no contact for about 2 months. I’m pretty sure she was seeing someone else before she broke up with me so she wouldn’t be alone. I had a feeling something was up but there was no communication. What happens in that situation where she immediately starts seeing someone else? I personally wouldn’t go back to her, because of major trust issues at that point but I’m curious what your perspective is on it. Thanks @blacademic
@@l.jeffreymoore2253happened to me, she left me and started seeing someone right away, I’m in no contact, it hurts and I want her back but I can’t. If she does reach out I won’t take her back because of that choice she made
I was hurting for a very long time and then something came over me where I just excepted the break up and moved on and know I don't even want him anymore and it took a long time but know I have someone and he treats me way better thank you so much Coach
Did not do any 1 0n 1 coaching..but i fallowed your advice from your videos..she is now back after 1 year...taking things slow and on my terms. Thanks coach blac.
I am in month 4 of no contact. Didn’t think I’d make it, but here we are. My ex can kick rocks! Her free trial is up! EDIT: Just yesterday, she liked one of my instagram posts. Satan be gone! I ain’t falling for that bait!
@@Omnitrix8 am also 4 months into NC and totally no contact I seem to be moving on and gradually forgetting about her though thoughts about her still flash through my mind Am even in a new relationship. I wish I can entirely forget about her and delete my memories with her so that I can nurture my new relationship
My ex broke up with me a month ago. Our communication broke down over time and I let my ‘bodybuilding’ consume my life without any compromise. In a strange way I’m thankful she walked away as it made me realise what my priorities are in life. I didn’t beg or plead however I did leave her a letter with flowers to express the things I had reflected on. She reached out 2 days after I left the letter saying she really appreciated it and wants to get coffee in a few weeks. These videos have helped me so much, I’m excited but also reserved for this coffee. I believe we are meant to be, somewhere along the way I lost myself and stopped building our relationship. I’m hoping she realises the changes I’ve made.
@@CHEFDADDY21 gotta know your self worth. I do still love her and there was a lot I did wrong in the relationship, I do believe when we get coffee we will be able to communicate and work on things. The breakup was very amicable
Thanks for modeling a healthy mindset, we feel like we are in a dumpster fire😂out here most women today😅its sick 😂down with the sickness, they say kids are the real ride or die, my daughter does a MEAN impression of the intro to that song @@AaronJamesPT
I appreciate this update in your life it gives me hope because I too wasn’t the best partner I made mistakes and she had enough so she broke up with me 4 years gone. It’s been 6 months I find out she’s been hanging out with the guy she told me not to worry about, I hate this feeling but I’ve been going to the gym eating right and I feel disciplined. I really want to leave her a big bouquet of flowers with some letters I wrote and a picture frame of her dog she let go of before we separated, as my final act of love for her
you’re amazing to listen to! you’ve been such a motivator for me in this process. thank you! my ex reached our after seven weeks radio silence. He’s definitely putting feelers out and consistently calling but not chasing at all. I guess I’ll stay nc and hopefully he’ll step it up??? I love him, but I want getting back together to be his idea.
12 years of marriage just thrown away by my wife and we also had two kids who presently live with her. I love how you describe sometimes women would go after the 20% missing when we had a good relation based on that 80% I have not spoken to her for nearly three years. She moved with my kids into her new man’s house. That broke my heart knowing my son and daughter are receiving attention from another man. Is she better now ? I don’t think so but I wish her good luck and happy life
Marriage vows are a joke to modern women. Her chump will get the same treatment as you did. There will always be a need, spoken or unspoken, that will not be met at some point and she will jump ship to the next sucker. Pathological selfishness only gets worse over time. Just grab your popcorn and enjoy your life.
@@TheBlackGlovesOfficialpathological selfishness isn't a woman problem it's a human problem. I'm a woman who is extremely faithful and takes marriage vows very seriously, and meanwhile, I've been cheated on by men who don't take their vows seriously. There's no need to be sexist and assume it's a female problem
Man getting me through my breakup day by day. I did a lot of begging and pleading before I encountered your videos then I went no contact. She'd said I should never contact her. A month later, she is in what I presume her curiosity stage. I am indifferent, and I will continue with the lessons.
Sigh I just did this too. He broke up after our first heated fight and I said everything under the sun trying to fix it and say I was sorry and I loved him. I wish I kept my mouth shut 🥲😔 I said way too much.
2nd time she dumped me. First time your videos helped and we got back together. 2nd time Indisnt even go no contact, just said eff it and stopped talking to her. Living my life fine without her. Your videos helped me focus on myself and be happy with my life
My X I'm sure it's some kind of avoidant. I had to literally BEG for a hug if I had a bad day. I excused his lack of affection as his upbringing. In the end, he left me, thinking some floozy, rich widow 10 years older than him was more desirable. I've been in no contact for 21 days, though he reached out 10 days ago. He wrecked floozy's motorcycle. Yay karma!
Hey Coach. Thanks for being one of the few that always find to have a tone and mindset that initiates such hope for the resolving a breakup. *My story since 2 months back* We broke up over phone after 3 years. After 11 days I saw her holding hands with another dude. I WAS in NC at the time. 2 weeks after that I sent her a text gratulating on the new rebound and at the same time also told her that it was a pity that she initiated the relationship while we were together. And ofc She denied that. Then After 2 weeks i sent her a long message wanting closure she went balistic blaming me for everything, told me to let her go. then she Blocked me everywere (even my number) except for one platform. So up untill that moment , did not call, or anything. But after that it want down hill and I did all the opposite from there. *Knocked on her door while she told me that I behavour was sick for aproaching her. *That she didnt love me and that she also told me to my face that she didnt even read my 3 page letter of forgivness and appreciation. Before I knew that she was dating her friends brother she told med that she did not have any contact with him but then when I confronted her she told me that he only was a "friend" (that I didnt even know about). No sign of accountability and then she blocked me. After all of this I came to learn that she might be an avoidant and im An anxious type. So might be the reason why we stayed so long. So now im healing I guess. Hitting the gym frequently and trying to deal with all of the emotions while focusing on a better future. 🎉
Everything what you said coach is 100% authentic. It’s common for people to continue monitoring their ex partner’s social media even after a break up. Curiosity, Emotional Attachment, Uncertainty, Respect for Boundaries and Mixed Feelings. My ex still watches my social media up to this day, 9 months after she decided to walk away. She could be in a rebound relationship, for that I am certain just knowing how my ex is, but I don’t really care about that. Self-improvement and creating a good social abundance for myself and for the people around me is what makes you high value. As she watches my stories constantly and saw she could loose me, she started to do breadcrumbs. Coach you are correct. No Contact is so powerful. #stayingstrong
I could see a difference, but never understood from where his angst came. I now reflect on the things he said about his ex-wife. His inability to allow her into his world literally drove her mad. I am so fortunate to know when to pull away. He left to see his children, telling me that he would be back in two weeks. I told him not to come back. I deserve better. Coach Blac’s videos have helped me to understand what to pay attention to in my next relationship. My ex strongly displays avoidant behavior almost to the letter. It is unfortunate that he has not been able to forge a healthy relationship with the opposite sex as he approaches 60!
This works!! I haven’t spoken too my ex since march and I’ve had zero contact w her and too my surprise she add me back on snap the other day and is the one texting first all the time but I limit the convo sometimes bc I don’t wanna sound desperate and I’m not replying every second otherwise it looks like I have nothing too do
In my case coach, i dont hesitate to cut all the connections because of his Disrespectful Manners , Calling my name in other way, Accusing me a lot of things that i didn't do . I dont deserve a bare minimum efforts, i dont deserve being Disrespected i dont even doubt my Loyalty and faithfulness that i give him genuinely and this is not the first time he always did we already done the settlement before i tell everything to him openly what that things that can hurt me the most i love this Man wholeheartedly accepting him deeply but if he dont appreciate my presence and dont see my worth of value then Im tried to push the Relationship work it out .
My only question is, how will they miss me via no-contact when they have built a great life for themselves during our long distance. She has a lot of distractions to make herself feel better and after 2 months, is already talking to people.
Thank you Coach Blac. Your advice helps me with my self improvement. I just discovered that I am an avoidant .My ex dumped me last week. I didn't beg or fight when she told me that I always disappear and I don't care about her. I took her for granted. I show no close emotions to her and I never fight with her and I pull away when she says something or criticizes me. Should I stay in no contact since no contact is one of her dislikes about me already? Thanks for all your help.
Yup after 7 months he a Tatted liking my post and just commented on one of them yesterday. I didn’t directly respond only reacted to it with a laugh and left it as is.
What about if I was the one who ended the marriage? I felt my avoidant ex checked out and prepare of losing me 3 months before I file the divorce, he started seeing therapist as soon as I know this time I’m leaving him for real. I’m wondering what stage he is at and who is a dumper in my case? I have been discarded almost of my marriage. We didn’t have sex for 12 years, I was so miserable for too long till I couldn’t handle anymore. We have 2 months physical separation and 1 month of no contact.
Our last form of communication was April 7, 2024, making it four months of NC. When you start to lock in with yourself and start improving all aspects of your life, you begin to see that the NC process was more for you than attracting your ex back…if done properly.
Am 90 days into no contact and I seem to be letting go but thoughts about her flash through my mind regularly Update; Am now 4 months into no contact and going stronger
I learned to never give out your resume during the honeymoon stage. It was turned around and thrown in my face. I was so hurt and told him about my feeling. He then said he does give a f about my feelings. No contact for me ever
She dumped me to try something out with another guy she met while still with me I still have feelings but I have been focusing on myself unlike her I’m healing myself without bleeding on other people
what if they are married and they leave you as a friend? My male married friend doesn't talk to me anymore , I'm a female.. but I think he knew I had strong feelings for him!
What if they dumped you because you were too good for them and they said they didn't deserve you? They felt unable to meet your needs even though they never had a conversation!!
@@Growwithgrace101 That was a cop out. An excuse to leave the relationship. Like seriously, who ACTUALLY leaves a relationship on the grounds of the other being too good?
@@Omnitrix8 well I have to sgree with him! As much as I loved him he gave me breadcrumbs so technically he was correct. I would of been a lotal life long trustworthy partner. I have my life together and no drama. His loss unfortunately.
@@Growwithgrace101 You should still go NC, but If he reaches out you should set boundaries and not fall into the rhtym right away. Of course If you still want him.
@@RebelliouSTR I have been in NC for a year and wouldn't have him back but the breakup still bugs me because nothing made sense...everything that came out if his mouth that day was so confusing and made me question the whole 3 years we were together. It was like one minutes he was there holding my hand walking talking smiling...the next he started shaking and he dumped me with ridiculous excuses and sayung things that just messed my head up. I am still curious to listen and understand. I will be more careful in future.
@@Growwithgrace101 Only answer that comes into mind that he was just not compatible person for you. I believe every man with correct thinking would want his partner to be someone like you or someone that behaves like you've described. Sorry to hear that you haven't got any disclosure to know why exactly but live moves on and we have to carry through and focus on the things we can control. Hope all the best for you.
She broke up with me, and I want to have one last talk. I know people often advise against it, but since we work together and she wants to stay friends, I feel I need to be clear. I just want to tell her that we can’t stay friends, return her things, and let her know that I agree this breakup might be for the best. I'm not going to beg or talk about our relationship-I've accepted that it's over. Should I even do this?
My ex also tried to ask if we could be friends .. i said to him "i dont know about the future, but right now i dont wanna be friends with u. I want a clean cut, so we both can heal from this and focus on other things that are important. Im not saying we should block each other, but i dont wanna be in contact unless there is something REALLY important to say or some kind of emergency."
@@bafibaf1_ DO NOT ACCEPT THE OFFER OF BEING FRIENDS! It simply translates to ‘I will keep you as a backup in case things don’t work out with the new guy!’
@@Omnitrix8 I didn't. I talked with her I respect your decision to break up. Im also won't be someone who don't want me. But I can't be friend with you also. She was so sad almost about to cry. I'm so sad because of seeing her like that but this is the situation right now. But problem is we have to see eachother at work everyday and need to talk sometimes when we are around coworkers and same place.
Please coach help me with this 🙏🏻 My Ex (who dumped me and have a girlfriend) stalking my stories for SEVEN MONTHS ! He's always the first to view them ! (I always post happy things) But he never commented or talked to me. we are in no contact since the break up. Also he doesn't post anything in his social media anymore (He used to post a lot). I really don't know what's going on in his life. The only thing I know is he's watching me. Why he's doing this ☹️ ? I really don't understand
After a week of no contact, my ex called me today. Said he needed help. Says he is going to hurt himself and I need to come over. When I refused he said "nevermind" and "Do not ask my family and friends about me. Clearly I reached out to the wrong person for help." I never want to take this lightly. I sent him the suicide line a and said I can call the police. This made him very angry. I'm not sure how to proceed - go over to check on him? I just don't know what to do with that.
Was in no contact, and he kept reaching out after he left me, started hanging out and sleeping together again. but he got so upset when I saw the text messages on his phone talking to other women and lying telling me he wasn't. Taking them out, but when we go out, I was paying smh cuz he says he's broke and having a hard time without having a good job. Why come back to hurt me again? Crazy thing about it I still believe he is my person. But I told him I'm done went nc again. Wondering will he reach out again?
Dear coach, thank u for all the videos 🙏🏽. It helped me a lot❤️. But I need your perspective on this one: why do men break up with me and then stalking me to be best friends 😢💔 for years. What did I do wrong?
I agree my x has mixed feelings at the moment so I’m going no contact. She likes to spend time with me but then when she hangs out with family they remind her why she left and it confuses her so I’m going to let her be and better my self for her or my next partner. 6 pack incoming
my ex dumped me a few weeks ago, then we both were on different festivals and I did no contact. He wanted me back and told me again that he really wants children with me and a new start because he knows now that we both are meant to be togehter. We were back together, we slept togehter, we wanted to talk about the fresh new start for us and our future, and now yesterday, just a few days after coming back together he dumped me again and blocked me. I cannot understand how a person can do such painfull thinks to someone else. Now Im again in this painfull situation again... I can´t describe how much pain I´m feeling right now.
But what do I do if I broke up with him after went through issues and decided a break was right? Im stuck regretting my decision and he still loves and cares for me but is going through self destructive behavior. We're in our period of no contact right now, im scared to what the outcome may be and how hes going to feel. Hes talking to someone so quickly after our breakup, but has talked about the idea of seeing if we reconnect in the future, and also says he still wants me in his life no matter what. Its so confusing and i dont know what to do.
Keeps messaging right around 2 week duration. I’m done with the bread-crumbing. Too much one sided investment on my part. “I’m not the same man I was then. I got off track, I made mistakes, backslid my way into that place where souls get lost, lines get crossed, and the pain won’t go away. I’ve hit my knees now here stand, There I was, now here I am, I’m changed….” .
It was a mutual break up/divorce . But I still dream about him and get sad when he talks differently with me on the phone. We had kids together and he has someone new and so do I. But I just need to get over it. It’s killing me. It’s been 2 years and I still feel like crap about it
I was logical but angry by HOW they did it. Not the fact that they did it. I tried to reach out for amicable closure- ghosted from the initial breakup txt. Finally went silent. Not playing into their drama games. That’s all they wanted was drama.
Back in March a week before my birthday the girl that I was with for five years and engaged to randomly left. I had no idea about these videos about this concept any of it and for the first month that was absolutely fine. I ended up meeting this girl thatwas on a whole Nother level, but things started to progress with this girl. Reality started hitting me and it started to kill me inside having all these questions. Why would she leave, where did this come from and I felt like I needed so many answers and my biggest mistake was asking her! The things my ex said to me were beyond hurtful, that she didn’t want to settle for me, that what if there’s someone out there that treats her exactly like I do but doesn’t have baggage meaning marriage or kids! That stuff destroyed me as a person. I’ve never been in such a dark place in my life to where I almost did something so stupid to myself. I’ve never cried so hard and panic so much in my life over anything and I just felt like I had to get her back. I was so obsessed with it that I ruined the new relationship with this other person that was an absolute dying piece and just such a great person. So not once this year but I lost two things that were really important to me. My ex fiancé had blocked me on everything, but if I found a way to reach out, she would have our conversations with Me about the same arguments. She told me that she has to block me because she wants to talk to me even if it’s to fight and she doesn’t want to know me she wants to be with me, but she can’t do that . I’ve left her completely alone now for two weeks and she has an old Instagram account that she made two years ago that she only has one post on and like 13 people that she follows and now that I’m posting reels of my day-to-day activity and having fun and doing things that I enjoy, I noticed that she watches every single one of them. I mean it’s exactly what you’re saying in this video. I haven’t reacted to it honestly me posting that stuff was for the other girl cause I wanted to see if she was gonna look lol way too fine to not feel like seeing my fiancé being the one creeping was a huge shock but I honestly don’t care anymore. I don’t know if that means she wants me back or if the no contact thing is putting all of this into her head about losing me, but I do know that that dark place that I was a couple months ago I’ve crawled out of that, and I can’t imagine what my ex could even say that would entice me to get back with her even if that was something that she did.
Amazing how cold and heartless these women are. Leaving was actually the best thing. Think about it, most of us was under that love spell, and once they were gone we improved our lives. What they do to hurt us, only makes us stronger. I’m never going back to that dark place…..ever.
@@yetitv8099 I logged into her IG on Sunday and found out she’s been messing with this dude we both know for awhile. That “I need time and space” was her way of trying something else out and keeping me on the side
Day 101 no contact. She did message twice in July about exchanging our stuff. My brother in law messaged her to coordinate and set up a time and day to do that. She said that she will get back to him. No message from her since.
She’s done, I asked her to call me back after her appointment and she never did, and she said she would. We were together for 5 years and married since 2021. And have a 1 year old, it’s sad actually
@@Luke-gs6kz I know, it killed me. Honestly, I can say that she was the best. Before she left me, we were the greatest couple and everybody used to say that when we walked in a room, we lit it up and we were the perfect couple so happy so loving, so tuned to another. and then couple days after Thanksgiving she picked a fight with me and threw me out and now she’s living with her mom and I’m living where we used to live together. it kills me to be inside there by myself. I get my daughter three times maybe four every week and she’s struggling and I’m doing better. I’ve done Boxing since January and I am now an amateur with a record of 3-0 she said the other day when she saw me she said “ holy shit you’re ripped” I hope one day to make love to her again get closure, but I know she will never find somebody like me
@@Croy617 boxing is huge, did u recently change careers or something? Girls need stability maybe she thought u couldn’t do it? But wow 3-0 is huge, maybe too much porn? Idk dude, I’m going through it too ur a beast
@@Luke-gs6kz I have my own company, she cheated on me while she was on vacation with her mom and our daughter, while I was working making money, 2 weeks she was gone and I had better $8,000, I think the guilt got to her idk man
What if you are the person who "destroyed it" and he left you. You are doing everything for yourself to make it right but is it not then my job to put it back together?
Coach, 4 months of no contact. Not much after initially. She reached out with a small happy birthday… I said thanks and happy early bday… went back to no contact. 5 days later and I still didn’t reach out for her bday. Now she’s mad I didn’t reach out to her. She posted on her social media. I think she thinks I should have reached out and now she’s pissed. What do you do? Continue no contract?
Since she broke up with me she likes my instagram posts and some of the stories, what does that mean? I've been in no contact for one month! It's painful but will not reach out to her! I work in a gym and saw that she is flirting with another guy, she told me about him months ago, i didn't do anything. Is this a sigh that she will not come ir reach out ?
It's been 6 months. I went into no contact immediately and there was no months and months of buildup for her to stop loving me. It was long distance and then I met her in person again and in less than 2 weeks she left and the last message I sent she didn't reply to. She's checked my WhatsApp and telegram status a handful of times since then but has never texted me or reached out or anything. I think it's over and I did nothing wrong. She even said I'm not good for you and that she was really sorry and she thought she was taking all her problems out on me. I don't know what happened. All I know is that she will not talk to me or at least she won't text me or hasn't text me
I guess we the same man. I had this special person. A year ago we were so good together and something happened where she cut all communications and was seeing someone else who later i found out left her less than 3 months. After that we got connected again however i was disappointed when she told me when i asked her if something happened between them in those months, she gave everything to him especially herself. I was held back to fully commit to her even she wanted commitment from me. It took me a month to gather my thoughts if im ready to commit to her fully, and when i did she didnt want it anymore and cut all communication with me. For the whole month of march and two weeks of April i was fighting for her but she gave me cold responses. I stopped everything and recently saw her and approached her after months of not talking and seeing each other. What did i get? Colder responses. Oh well i wish her well and she will always be part of my life and in my heart. Hopefully she takes good care of herself and her family. Azizam
My ex broke up with me a week before my birthday two weeks ago the day he broke up with me i was pleading and begging to not break up with me he blocked me on his phone so i blocked his number and social media at this point i dont want him back this is the second time he walked out on me
I think that doesn't deserve to be taken back at this point. I've really kinda gotten over her in the no contact period. I'd be willing to take the cheese but as for a relationship she would have to do more work than I think she realizes honestly.
Hi Coach, do you think there is a high chanse to get back in this kind of situation: I was in a situationship for 1,5 years. We didnt want to put label on the relationship because the time we met, we both were in a really low period of our time, so we both had many fears and unsures of commitment. In the end, our situationship didnt end short and we started actually act like proper couple. Everything felt fine and the relationship flowed effortlessy. It was imo the best relationship i ever had with someone! After a year or so, I realized my feeling were deeper than his. I still waited a little bit for the chanse that maybe he would ask me to put a proper label on the relationship we were in. That didnt happen in the end, so then i felt it was time me to move on, or to fix this problem together. I gave him some space to reflect on this, and he got into a conclusion that he is still unsure about me, and he started to feel bad that he is holding me in a relatioship where there is no safety for me. He also got into a conclusion, that he wants and needs experience life on his own (bacause his 20s were spent battling with depression), and felt like it feels settling too much if he stays with me. So I let him go and i really wish him for the best. Im ready to battle with my work and improve my life even more. Tbh I even feel a little bit exited about it, even tho i just had the break up. Our connection was real and we saw each others vulnerabilities. I gave him safety and supported him in good and bads moments. The chemistry was on fire hahah! We had many things in common and things we were interested in. Do u think there is a high chanse, that after a while he understands how good things were between us? I really would love if he would start to pursuit me, but I will give this situation lay in the universe's hand..🙏
Great video. My fiacee broke me after a 4 years relation, in a great fight she told me to leace here and then i moved from her like 38 days ago, i tried to be talk with her but she ignored me and from then we are in no contact after 32 days, Yesterday from nowere she blocked me from all platforms, and i did not posted any changed of my life or someting...is she moved on....?
Couch i got break up 2weeks before 3rd time i have gone to no contact again she have started seeing my stories but i didn't see her stories but she is posted many stories yesterday she have posted a sad quote i have ingnored it but suddenly she have unfollowed me today I can't understand why she have done this it's any possibility to get her back again is it she trying to move on forever im confused alot please give me a solution.....😢
Broke up with the girl a month ago. Changed my mind and want to make it work. She said she didn’t know what she wanted. Texting and visits were getting short and late responses. I’m 2 days into no contact rules but her freakin birthday is in a week! Am I really not going to text happy birthday or get a gift or hang out? This has stumped me Coach Blac! What do I do?
This exactly describes what my avoidant ex behaved like after he dumped me , loved me one week , the next week he finished with me . I immediately went in to no contact ( was difficult! ) but I stuck it out . Within 3 weeks we was liking all my Facebook posts ( this was a new behaviour) , I absolutely knew he was trying to get my attention, I didn’t react , I stuck rigidly to no contact , 9 weeks later he finally caved in and started messaging me . We met up for dinner , I quickly realised he hasn’t changed , but rather that he was slightly jealous I appeared to be moving on and enjoying myself in the process , I felt a shift of power at that point . I’m now back in no contact , not really sure how to handle him if he comes back again though , any tips or advice would be welcome .
i didnt actually watch the video but from experience of being the dumper or being dumped heres what i can say: as the dumper i felt like i could do better without her and that the grass would be greener on the other side, but then soon i realized i miss her and nobody could ever take her place but im not the one who went back at first for fear of getting hurt, she came back which made me happy, same relationship but this time i am the one beinf dumped, my pov is that she’s overwhelmed and feels like its not beneficial to her anymore so she left me, ik it sounds toxic but thats how everyone feels when they dump someone, im doing no contact but not before a week of tryinf to get her back, the dumper doesnt care how you feel and they take you for granted at the time, depends on the situation but if they truly miss u and love u they would wanna try again, but if they dont, then they wont reach out and no contact allows you to first find yourself while also potentially attracting your ex back which is what im trying now
Hi coach, Why is he calling me from different numbers after I've done no contact and have 🚫 him? I don't have social media. He's caught on camera coming over to my home unannounced? I was at home but never answered the door and hes caught going on the side and in the back of my home looking around too. The neighbors saw him as well. Wassup with that ish?
Does this apply with anger? He blocked me a month after I already blocked him. But I think he saw me on the ring at his mother’s house.. I was genuinely happy, he probably heard her say how good and beautiful I looked.. then I noticed I was blocked on everything…
I just blocked my ex thru no contact bc he only kept giving me bread crumbs. We had been in no contact for just 15 days. I do not know if I did right blocking him...? I never answered to his bread crumbs.
My situation is a tricky one. My fiancé and I got into a big fight which resulted in me getting arrested for domestic assault. Nothing crazy happened, things just got out of hand. We had been together for over 5 years. We have had problems over the years, but we love each other dearly and were hands down each others best friend. We also have a child together which further complicates things. I'm forced to have no contact with her for 2 months do to the arrest. There are three weeks left. During this time, I've worked diligently on becoming a better man. I know there is a lot we both need to work on, but I would love to work things out. She has told my lawyers that she's not wanting to reconcile though. Should I continue the no contact even after the 2 months of court ordered no contact is up? Or should I apologize for my wrong doings, tell her that I still love her, and suggest that we go on a date and see how we feel about the future.
My ex broke up with me last week, we still love each other but circumstances weren’t great, her family didn’t like me, but we still talk everyday and have met up 3 times for sex now, I’ve tried cutting it off but she keeps coming back and is very in and out when it comes to meeting up now, what should I do?
HI Coach Black, i am stuck in 2yrs craziness with my ex, when I am still tested by ex, and yes I have to admit, that I begged and chased...please tell me when I will in no contact after 2yrs could it help us? I dont know what to do :(. Thank you.
NC for over 1week after chasing him hard for 3week. He sent me Random links to Twitter posts. But never asked any questions. Then he called me a few days later. I ignored the calls and didn’t return. He called again a few days later. I answered and asked he asked if I was okay. I told him I am fine and he asked me if I am sure to which I responded yes. we ended the call after that. Few hours later he sent me a news article. Then I woke up today to another news article. I have been ignoring the articles as he hasn’t said anything or asked any questions. What does this mean? Is he trying to bait me into chasing him?
Hey Coach do you have a video where you're talking about a dumper completely disappearing after breaking up and saying to never bother them again ? It's been a month , still no contact, I don't think I'm getting her back.
going through this now, 4 weeks since i was dumped, she is 60 soon, and had stress from her job and other factors, i think hormones as well. just erupted about everything one weekend, sick of her life routine, and i was involved in that, some of the outbursts she was saying allsorts about everything, midlife crisis maybe. you cant just turn you feelings off like that, although with all those factors i mention, some can, women are complicated at the best of times. its as if ive murdered somebody, all very strange. just have to wait this one out, not done the proper no contact yet, shes very hot and cold when i do contact her. but won't entertain talking about the relatonship at all, thats when it kicks off. so i'm at a loss as to what to do. her family not sure whats up with her. see what happens.
I recently broke up with my ex but he checked out of the relationship since May/June I’m trying to get over the relationship but hit hurts like hell!!! Recently he posted a picture of me on twitter and I’m reaching out to him to ask him why he posted me on his twitter account he does not respond to me. He has blocked me from contacting him. In my mind I’m ready to let the relationship go but emotionally it hurts I don’t know what to do especially with him recently posting a picture of me on his only social media page like whyyyyyyyy
What if you were dumbed for somebody else in a situationship which develeped out of a friendship? I made a trip to a foreign country and she went dating somebody else because she said she wasn't sure i love her.
Hi, he broke up with me in March, he told me horrible things, that he was sure of the separation, that he wouldn't come back and I automatically made zero contact, a month later I sent voice messages with some things I needed to say to go on in peace and I was the lightest possible without blame or blame, he responded kindly but without further conversation on both sides. From March 31st I continued my life, I traveled in April to Milan and in June to Malta (always in total silence) and during the trip to Malta he came to leave a like on my Instagram photo from my holiday (note that I automatically left it unfollowed and I removed it from my followers right after he finished), I continued and remain silent but now in July I noticed that he took the like off my photo. But Im silent 💪🏼 What can I draw as a conclusion from this action? thanks. I love the content 👌🏼🙏🏼
2 days ago she breaks up with me she said we have different personality and thinking and we in contact for 7 months and she knew my personality from the beginning then why she gave me the time and space to go deep with her and now she realized we are different?? Idk what's wrong
![Gunna - HIM ALL ALONG [Official Visualizer]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/HiCxoDeo0hc/mqdefault.jpg)
Listen to what this man says. It's all true. My ex came back after 6 months, but she hasnt changed at all and ive made immense self worth growth. I have tons of options now, she doesnt.
She gave me closure and we met up, had a great time. But it was me who realizes we wouldnt work out, even though she told me she loved me. I cant go through the same discarded breakup again.
Remember, if nothing changes....nothing changes.
Keep your head up Kings, work on yourself. Pour that love you poured into her back when you were together, and pour it back into you. It should always be poured into you first. Your queen will come.
😂 perfect reply to this dick
"Change the ppl around you" another 2 meaning sentence like 👍 his
Coach black ! My ex just called last night at 3 am from almost 3 weeks of no contact. I listened and focused on myself and sharing that with social media and she reached out. She asked me to come over and talk and we both wanted more in the moment but decided on starting from the beginning and going slow. Words can’t describe how much I thank you. Keep your head up people, I at one point lost all hope too.
Psa, she reached out right when i was about to be fine with the fact she was gone. Once you realize your worth and can be fine with what happened , they always come back
Wow you’re blessed. Could we get updates from you frequently just to check on the relationship progress??
Good video, bro. I agree with you in many ways. I also have a video on this topic.
3 weeks no contact she's back King thnx ❤
Boom! Congrats bro 🤞🏿
Nice!
I fucked up continue sleeping with him making him think it was okay to juggle me until i learned no contact now im doing no contact im getting crumbs he watches me stalks my social media and call or text but i dont answer doing everything to get my attention at first i was responding now im learning doing it for 30 days im 2 weeks in its so hard but we have 3 kids and been together 10 years and yes i want him back but what he is doing is not ok@@blacademic
Sometimes you just need to know you ok without them and no matter what happens you will be fine and that can take time. Acceptance is key. express yourself once and always let the person know there are no hard feelings you are just expressing the way you feel. Don't chase be ok no matter whT happens. Find things new to look forward to.
These “dumpers” are wild. You have to stay ready so you don’t have to get ready….they’ll throw everything they can to get your attention. Good thing I have my blinders on. 😎☺️
My dumper is prideful and ego is so high
Yeahhhhhh…..same. My sister was following mine on Instagram for a while after we broke up (I don’t have any social media) and said she was celebrating 24hrs after dumping me, posting all this shit about how she was “liberated” and “free” and “facing her demons” and various other cliche stuff, to the point that my sister was even like “what did you do to her? Was your guys breakup ugly?”
My ex discarded me 48 hours after the greatest night of our time together, lamenting about how no man ever treated her as well as I did and that the night we had together, seeing her fav band before they broke up, was “one of the greatest nights of her life.” Yet my ex out here posting like she dumped Jeffrey Dahmer and it really just goes to show her lack of emotional maturity. I was really, really sad for the first two weeks after she left because she offered ZERO closure and wouldn’t even do it to my face (despite ME always being the calm, levelheaded one between us).
The more time I’ve spent in no contact with her (coming up in a month in the next few days), the more I realize that I really did put her on a pedestal and I’ve concluded that she’s a 32 year old
Woman with the emotional maturity of a teenager. 32 years old, never been fired or let go from a job, never been dumped, never really faced any sort of rejection in general. She is EXTREMELY attractive, like a combo of Angelina Jolie and Scar Jo, tall, athletic, the most gorgeous green eyes I’ve ever seen and she’s smart too and grew up in an extremely wealthy household to boot.
Rejection is SUCH a powerful tool if you can harness the negative energy and turn it into positivity. The key here is to not fall into the trap of self destructive behavior. Since we broke up, I haven’t had any alcohol, I’ve rekindled several old friendships and even went back to some old hobbies I’ve neglected over the years, I’ve finished reading 3 books, and I’ve been destroying my gym goals. I honestly don’t know if I’d even take her back if she asked, but it doesn’t matter because I’ve already told myself she’s never coming back and I’m not allowed to contact her either and I think her ego will keep her from contacting me as well
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really loved him so much I can’t stop thinking about him, I’ve tried my very best to get him back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of him, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss him and just can’t stop thinking about him
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach him?
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive
Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
I understand you. I´m in the same position right now. I can tell you, that you have to move on, you have to find yourself and self worth and if it´´s meant to be, than he will come back. Trust the Universe. I will try the same now after he dumped me again yesterday after we were back together not even one week ago.
@@Allenwatts-y9nhahah scammer!
Mia,
Don't contact him for 3 months...then get in touch..go out for dinner..dress sexy...treat him like a friend and be cold n distant...leave your dinner date early...go home n never contact him...trust me he will call you n ask you out again n he will ask your hand shortly after that😉
Hey Coach after 50 days or so of no contact I’ve got to a stage where I’d be okay if they don’t come back and I can move on, but I’m still here watching the videos for the lessons, thank you brother
Same. It's been 10 months no contact. Sad they didn't want to repair, but I'll be alright. In fact, I AM alright.
60 days here. Third time I’ve had to do this with her. At this point I can give a rat’s ass if she comes back or not this time. Her loss
Same here.
In my situation I lived about 80 miles apart from my ex. Been no contact for about 2 months. I’m pretty sure she was seeing someone else before she broke up with me so she wouldn’t be alone. I had a feeling something was up but there was no communication. What happens in that situation where she immediately starts seeing someone else? I personally wouldn’t go back to her, because of major trust issues at that point but I’m curious what your perspective is on it. Thanks @blacademic
@@l.jeffreymoore2253happened to me, she left me and started seeing someone right away, I’m in no contact, it hurts and I want her back but I can’t. If she does reach out I won’t take her back because of that choice she made
Thing is...The Grass ISN'T GREENER On The OtherSide. Love Your perspective. They have To Put "US" Back Together ❤️
I was hurting for a very long time and then something came over me where I just excepted the break up and moved on and know I don't even want him anymore and it took a long time but know I have someone and he treats me way better thank you so much Coach
LOVE THIS!!!!! This is probably my favorite and it is now my anthem
Thanks for watching! I appreciate the feedback 🙏
Did not do any 1 0n 1 coaching..but i fallowed your advice from your videos..she is now back after 1 year...taking things slow and on my terms. Thanks coach blac.
how did you feel for that year?
How many men did she try out in that time? Mine at least has been with one in 3 months and idk if I could ever take her seriously again :(
You're very experienced & resourceful as well.
The example you gave about the castle was indeed an excellent choice!
Thanks for the feedback! This is my passion. But I appreciate the kind words
@@blacademic I honestly mean every single word I wrote-it's not "kind words",it's the truth.
I am in month 4 of no contact. Didn’t think I’d make it, but here we are. My ex can kick rocks! Her free trial is up!
EDIT: Just yesterday, she liked one of my instagram posts. Satan be gone! I ain’t falling for that bait!
@@Omnitrix8 am also 4 months into NC and totally no contact
I seem to be moving on and gradually forgetting about her though thoughts about her still flash through my mind
Am even in a new relationship. I wish I can entirely forget about her and delete my memories with her so that I can nurture my new relationship
Love the 80/20 example. Was very helpful.
My ex broke up with me a month ago. Our communication broke down over time and I let my ‘bodybuilding’ consume my life without any compromise.
In a strange way I’m thankful she walked away as it made me realise what my priorities are in life. I didn’t beg or plead however I did leave her a letter with flowers to express the things I had reflected on.
She reached out 2 days after I left the letter saying she really appreciated it and wants to get coffee in a few weeks.
These videos have helped me so much, I’m excited but also reserved for this coffee.
I believe we are meant to be, somewhere along the way I lost myself and stopped building our relationship. I’m hoping she realises the changes I’ve made.
Childs mom broke up with me a month ago..I’m body building now. But I’m not goingBack. She gonna have to see this greatness with someone else 👌🏾
@@CHEFDADDY21 gotta know your self worth. I do still love her and there was a lot I did wrong in the relationship, I do believe when we get coffee we will be able to communicate and work on things. The breakup was very amicable
Thanks for modeling a healthy mindset, we feel like we are in a dumpster fire😂out here most women today😅its sick 😂down with the sickness, they say kids are the real ride or die, my daughter does a MEAN impression of the intro to that song @@AaronJamesPT
I appreciate this update in your life it gives me hope because I too wasn’t the best partner I made mistakes and she had enough so she broke up with me 4 years gone. It’s been 6 months I find out she’s been hanging out with the guy she told me not to worry about, I hate this feeling but I’ve been going to the gym eating right and I feel disciplined. I really want to leave her a big bouquet of flowers with some letters I wrote and a picture frame of her dog she let go of before we separated, as my final act of love for her
you’re amazing to listen to! you’ve been such a motivator for me in this process. thank you!
my ex reached our after seven weeks radio silence. He’s definitely putting feelers out and consistently calling but not chasing at all. I guess I’ll stay nc and hopefully he’ll step it up??? I love him, but I want getting back together to be his idea.
12 years of marriage just thrown away by my wife and we also had two kids who presently live with her. I love how you describe sometimes women would go after the 20% missing when we had a good relation based on that 80% I have not spoken to her for nearly three years. She moved with my kids into her new man’s house. That broke my heart knowing my son and daughter are receiving attention from another man. Is she better now ? I don’t think so but I wish her good luck and happy life
Marriage vows are a joke to modern women. Her chump will get the same treatment as you did. There will always be a need, spoken or unspoken, that will not be met at some point and she will jump ship to the next sucker. Pathological selfishness only gets worse over time. Just grab your popcorn and enjoy your life.
@@TheBlackGlovesOfficialpathological selfishness isn't a woman problem it's a human problem. I'm a woman who is extremely faithful and takes marriage vows very seriously, and meanwhile, I've been cheated on by men who don't take their vows seriously. There's no need to be sexist and assume it's a female problem
@@sundragon13it is a woman problem. Women initiate 80% of all divorces. You are a unicorn.
Love what your saying. It provides so much support as well as info. You deserve more subs
Man getting me through my breakup day by day. I did a lot of begging and pleading before I encountered your videos then I went no contact. She'd said I should never contact her. A month later, she is in what I presume her curiosity stage. I am indifferent, and I will continue with the lessons.
Sigh I just did this too. He broke up after our first heated fight and I said everything under the sun trying to fix it and say I was sorry and I loved him. I wish I kept my mouth shut 🥲😔 I said way too much.
It really does makes sence and everything that is being elaborated on this videos is so True 😢😢😭😭👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾
2nd time she dumped me. First time your videos helped and we got back together. 2nd time Indisnt even go no contact, just said eff it and stopped talking to her. Living my life fine without her. Your videos helped me focus on myself and be happy with my life
My X I'm sure it's some kind of avoidant. I had to literally BEG for a hug if I had a bad day. I excused his lack of affection as his upbringing. In the end, he left me, thinking some floozy, rich widow 10 years older than him was more desirable. I've been in no contact for 21 days, though he reached out 10 days ago. He wrecked floozy's motorcycle. Yay karma!
I am the dumper. I broke up with him because I had enough of disrespect.
But i do really miss him. Hoping he reach out.
I love how you go into the psychology, love your content overall ❤
Hey Coach.
Thanks for being one of the few that always find to have a tone and mindset that initiates such hope for the resolving a breakup.
*My story since 2 months back*
We broke up over phone after 3 years. After 11 days I saw her holding hands with another dude. I WAS in NC at the time. 2 weeks after that I sent her a text gratulating on the new rebound and at the same time also told her that it was a pity that she initiated the relationship while we were together.
And ofc She denied that.
Then After 2 weeks i sent her a long message wanting closure she went balistic blaming me for everything, told me to let her go. then she Blocked me everywere (even my number) except for one platform. So up untill that moment , did not call, or anything. But after that it want down hill and I did all the opposite from there.
*Knocked on her door while she told me that I behavour was sick for aproaching her.
*That she didnt love me and that she also told me to my face that she didnt even read my 3 page letter of forgivness and appreciation.
Before I knew that she was dating her friends brother she told med that she did not have any contact with him but then when I confronted her she told me that he only was a "friend" (that I didnt even know about).
No sign of accountability and then she blocked me.
After all of this I came to learn that she might be an avoidant and im An anxious type. So might be the reason why we stayed so long.
So now im healing I guess. Hitting the gym frequently and trying to deal with all of the emotions while focusing on a better future.
🎉
Everything what you said coach is 100% authentic. It’s common for people to continue monitoring their ex partner’s social media even after a break up. Curiosity, Emotional Attachment, Uncertainty, Respect for Boundaries and Mixed Feelings.
My ex still watches my social media up to this day, 9 months after she decided to walk away. She could be in a rebound relationship, for that I am certain just knowing how my ex is, but I don’t really care about that. Self-improvement and creating a good social abundance for myself and for the people around me is what makes you high value. As she watches my stories constantly and saw she could loose me, she started to do breadcrumbs. Coach you are correct. No Contact is so powerful. #stayingstrong
Bro, I better get my girl back
lol lock in bro you got this 🤞🏿
😂😂😂😂 but forreal though 😂
😂😂😂
@blacademic good answer ,Coach B
Hilarious af😅!
I could see a difference, but never understood from where his angst came. I now reflect on the things he said about his ex-wife. His inability to allow her into his world literally drove her mad.
I am so fortunate to know when to pull away. He left to see his children, telling me that he would be back in two weeks. I told him not to come back. I deserve better.
Coach Blac’s videos have helped me to understand what to pay attention to in my
next relationship. My ex strongly displays avoidant behavior almost to the letter. It is unfortunate that he has not been able to forge a healthy relationship with the opposite sex as he approaches 60!
@blacademic3 Good morning! Are you suggesting that I book a session? Please advise.
90 days no contact, i already surpassed her, I've found many womens want me
Oh its a contest😂lol sad
This works!! I haven’t spoken too my ex since march and I’ve had zero contact w her and too my surprise she add me back on snap the other day and is the one texting first all the time but I limit the convo sometimes bc I don’t wanna sound desperate and I’m not replying every second otherwise it looks like I have nothing too do
@blacademic3 fake
10x bro....the nc stuff....work 100% ....day by day..not like it was in the past ...i got my self respect back ..again 10x alot bro
In my case coach, i dont hesitate to cut all the connections because of his Disrespectful Manners , Calling my name in other way, Accusing me a lot of things that i didn't do . I dont deserve a bare minimum efforts, i dont deserve being Disrespected i dont even doubt my Loyalty and faithfulness that i give him genuinely and this is not the first time he always did we already done the settlement before i tell everything to him openly what that things that can hurt me the most i love this Man wholeheartedly accepting him deeply but if he dont appreciate my presence and dont see my worth of value then Im tried to push the Relationship work it out .
My only question is, how will they miss me via no-contact when they have built a great life for themselves during our long distance. She has a lot of distractions to make herself feel better and after 2 months, is already talking to people.
Thank you Coach Blac. Your advice helps me with my self improvement. I just discovered that I am an avoidant .My ex dumped me last week. I didn't beg or fight when she told me that I always disappear and I don't care about her. I took her for granted. I show no close emotions to her and I never fight with her and I pull away when she says something or criticizes me. Should I stay in no contact since no contact is one of her dislikes about me already? Thanks for all your help.
Yup after 7 months he a
Tatted liking my post and just commented on one of them yesterday. I didn’t directly respond only reacted to it with a laugh and left it as is.
What about if I was the one who ended the marriage? I felt my avoidant ex checked out and prepare of losing me 3 months before I file the divorce, he started seeing therapist as soon as I know this time I’m leaving him for real.
I’m wondering what stage he is at and who is a dumper in my case? I have been discarded almost of my marriage. We didn’t have sex for 12 years, I was so miserable for too long till I couldn’t handle anymore.
We have 2 months physical separation and 1 month of no contact.
Our last form of communication was April 7, 2024, making it four months of NC. When you start to lock in with yourself and start improving all aspects of your life, you begin to see that the NC process was more for you than attracting your ex back…if done properly.
Am 90 days into no contact and I seem to be letting go but thoughts about her flash through my mind regularly
Update;
Am now 4 months into no contact and going stronger
I learned to never give out your resume during the honeymoon stage. It was turned around and thrown in my face. I was so hurt and told him about my feeling. He then said he does give a f about my feelings. No contact for me ever
After 3,5 weeks he send me a message to check in. I responded short but nice. And now it’s quiet again….
@@BGZ2022 he was testing water, to see if you still had the same feelings for him. He’s probably a narcissist
She dumped me to try something out with another guy she met while still with me I still have feelings but I have been focusing on myself unlike her I’m healing myself without bleeding on other people
Coach what’s the name of the instrumental in your videos??? It puts me at peace and I’d love to just listen to it on repeat
what if they are married and they leave you as a friend? My male married friend doesn't talk to me anymore , I'm a female.. but I think he knew I had strong feelings for him!
What if they dumped you because you were too good for them and they said they didn't deserve you?
They felt unable to meet your needs even though they never had a conversation!!
@@Growwithgrace101 That was a cop out. An excuse to leave the relationship. Like seriously, who ACTUALLY leaves a relationship on the grounds of the other being too good?
@@Omnitrix8 well I have to sgree with him! As much as I loved him he gave me breadcrumbs so technically he was correct. I would of been a lotal life long trustworthy partner. I have my life together and no drama. His loss unfortunately.
@@Growwithgrace101 You should still go NC, but If he reaches out you should set boundaries and not fall into the rhtym right away. Of course If you still want him.
@@RebelliouSTR I have been in NC for a year and wouldn't have him back but the breakup still bugs me because nothing made sense...everything that came out if his mouth that day was so confusing and made me question the whole 3 years we were together. It was like one minutes he was there holding my hand walking talking smiling...the next he started shaking and he dumped me with ridiculous excuses and sayung things that just messed my head up. I am still curious to listen and understand. I will be more careful in future.
@@Growwithgrace101 Only answer that comes into mind that he was just not compatible person for you. I believe every man with correct thinking would want his partner to be someone like you or someone that behaves like you've described. Sorry to hear that you haven't got any disclosure to know why exactly but live moves on and we have to carry through and focus on the things we can control. Hope all the best for you.
She broke up with me, and I want to have one last talk. I know people often advise against it, but since we work together and she wants to stay friends, I feel I need to be clear. I just want to tell her that we can’t stay friends, return her things, and let her know that I agree this breakup might be for the best. I'm not going to beg or talk about our relationship-I've accepted that it's over. Should I even do this?
My ex also tried to ask if we could be friends .. i said to him "i dont know about the future, but right now i dont wanna be friends with u. I want a clean cut, so we both can heal from this and focus on other things that are important. Im not saying we should block each other, but i dont wanna be in contact unless there is something REALLY important to say or some kind of emergency."
@@igchannel2174 When this happened how its going?
@@bafibaf1_ DO NOT ACCEPT THE OFFER OF BEING FRIENDS! It simply translates to ‘I will keep you as a backup in case things don’t work out with the new guy!’
@@Omnitrix8 I didn't. I talked with her I respect your decision to break up. Im also won't be someone who don't want me. But I can't be friend with you also. She was so sad almost about to cry. I'm so sad because of seeing her like that but this is the situation right now. But problem is we have to see eachother at work everyday and need to talk sometimes when we are around coworkers and same place.
IM PRAYING FOR EVERYONE 😢I PRAY EVERYDAY I GET HEALING ❤️🩹 AND OR MY EX BACK
Please coach help me with this 🙏🏻
My Ex (who dumped me and have a girlfriend)
stalking my stories for SEVEN MONTHS !
He's always the first to view them !
(I always post happy things)
But he never commented or talked to me.
we are in no contact since the break up.
Also he doesn't post anything in his
social media anymore (He used to post a lot).
I really don't know what's going on in his life.
The only thing I know is he's watching me.
Why he's doing this ☹️ ? I really don't understand
After a week of no contact, my ex called me today. Said he needed help. Says he is going to hurt himself and I need to come over. When I refused he said "nevermind" and "Do not ask my family and friends about me. Clearly I reached out to the wrong person for help." I never want to take this lightly. I sent him the suicide line a and said I can call the police. This made him very angry. I'm not sure how to proceed - go over to check on him? I just don't know what to do with that.
Great channel bro! lots of great info in these vids
Was in no contact, and he kept reaching out after he left me, started hanging out and sleeping together again. but he got so upset when I saw the text messages on his phone talking to other women and lying telling me he wasn't. Taking them out, but when we go out, I was paying smh cuz he says he's broke and having a hard time without having a good job. Why come back to hurt me again? Crazy thing about it I still believe he is my person. But I told him I'm done went nc again. Wondering will he reach out again?
Dear coach, thank u for all the videos 🙏🏽. It helped me a lot❤️. But I need your perspective on this one: why do men break up with me and then stalking me to be best friends 😢💔 for years. What did I do wrong?
I agree my x has mixed feelings at the moment so I’m going no contact. She likes to spend time with me but then when she hangs out with family they remind her why she left and it confuses her so I’m going to let her be and better my self for her or my next partner. 6 pack incoming
My ex broke up with me yesterday…I still have all my stuff at his place and I still have his keys. What do I do?
my ex dumped me a few weeks ago, then we both were on different festivals and I did no contact. He wanted me back and told me again that he really wants children with me and a new start because he knows now that we both are meant to be togehter.
We were back together, we slept togehter, we wanted to talk about the fresh new start for us and our future, and now yesterday, just a few days after coming back together he dumped me again and blocked me.
I cannot understand how a person can do such painfull thinks to someone else. Now Im again in this painfull situation again... I can´t describe how much pain I´m feeling right now.
Going back to an ex Is like reading the same book twice you know the ending .
I'll watch a good movie twice
Reading the same book twice can also help you understand what you didn’t the first time you read it
@TheTruth_888 very good! Brilliant
But what do I do if I broke up with him after went through issues and decided a break was right? Im stuck regretting my decision and he still loves and cares for me but is going through self destructive behavior. We're in our period of no contact right now, im scared to what the outcome may be and how hes going to feel. Hes talking to someone so quickly after our breakup, but has talked about the idea of seeing if we reconnect in the future, and also says he still wants me in his life no matter what. Its so confusing and i dont know what to do.
Keeps messaging right around 2 week duration.
I’m done with the bread-crumbing.
Too much one sided investment on my part.
“I’m not the same man I was then.
I got off track,
I made mistakes,
backslid my way into that place where souls get lost,
lines get crossed,
and the pain won’t go away.
I’ve hit my knees now here stand,
There I was, now here I am, I’m changed….”
.
It was a mutual break up/divorce . But I still dream about him and get sad when he talks differently with me on the phone. We had kids together and he has someone new and so do I. But I just need to get over it. It’s killing me. It’s been 2 years and I still feel like crap about it
I was logical but angry by HOW they did it. Not the fact that they did it. I tried to reach out for amicable closure- ghosted from the initial breakup txt. Finally went silent. Not playing into their drama games. That’s all they wanted was drama.
Back in March a week before my birthday the girl that I was with for five years and engaged to randomly left. I had no idea about these videos about this concept any of it and for the first month that was absolutely fine. I ended up meeting this girl thatwas on a whole Nother level, but things started to progress with this girl. Reality started hitting me and it started to kill me inside having all these questions. Why would she leave, where did this come from and I felt like I needed so many answers and my biggest mistake was asking her!
The things my ex said to me were beyond hurtful, that she didn’t want to settle for me, that what if there’s someone out there that treats her exactly like I do but doesn’t have baggage meaning marriage or kids! That stuff destroyed me as a person. I’ve never been in such a dark place in my life to where I almost did something so stupid to myself. I’ve never cried so hard and panic so much in my life over anything and I just felt like I had to get her back.
I was so obsessed with it that I ruined the new relationship with this other person that was an absolute dying piece and just such a great person. So not once this year but I lost two things that were really important to me.
My ex fiancé had blocked me on everything, but if I found a way to reach out, she would have our conversations with Me about the same arguments. She told me that she has to block me because she wants to talk to me even if it’s to fight and she doesn’t want to know me she wants to be with me, but she can’t do that . I’ve left her completely alone now for two weeks and she has an old Instagram account that she made two years ago that she only has one post on and like 13 people that she follows and now that I’m posting reels of my day-to-day activity and having fun and doing things that I enjoy, I noticed that she watches every single one of them. I mean it’s exactly what you’re saying in this video. I haven’t reacted to it honestly me posting that stuff was for the other girl cause I wanted to see if she was gonna look lol way too fine to not feel like seeing my fiancé being the one creeping was a huge shock but I honestly don’t care anymore. I don’t know if that means she wants me back or if the no contact thing is putting all of this into her head about losing me, but I do know that that dark place that I was a couple months ago I’ve crawled out of that, and I can’t imagine what my ex could even say that would entice me to get back with her even if that was something that she did.
Amazing how cold and heartless these women are. Leaving was actually the best thing. Think about it, most of us was under that love spell, and once they were gone we improved our lives. What they do to hurt us, only makes us stronger. I’m never going back to that dark place…..ever.
@@Flagarana yeah it’s crazy for sure.
I think usually they have your replacement lined up
Yes they always have a back up plan, self going through the same course NC for 20 days and counting
@@yetitv8099 I logged into her IG on Sunday and found out she’s been messing with this dude we both know for awhile. That “I need time and space” was her way of trying something else out and keeping me on the side
Hard to do NC when yall have a small child together…
I’m am ex I wanted to breakup because I want to take care of myself, heal, then move on with my life.
Day 101 no contact. She did message twice in July about exchanging our stuff. My brother in law messaged her to coordinate and set up a time and day to do that. She said that she will get back to him. No message from her since.
She’s done, I asked her to call me back after her appointment and she never did, and she said she would. We were together for 5 years and married since 2021. And have a 1 year old, it’s sad actually
Fuck
These people don’t care about you, pay attention and never let it happen again
@@Luke-gs6kz I know, it killed me. Honestly, I can say that she was the best. Before she left me, we were the greatest couple and everybody used to say that when we walked in a room, we lit it up and we were the perfect couple so happy so loving, so tuned to another. and then couple days after Thanksgiving she picked a fight with me and threw me out and now she’s living with her mom and I’m living where we used to live together. it kills me to be inside there by myself. I get my daughter three times maybe four every week and she’s struggling and I’m doing better. I’ve done Boxing since January and I am now an amateur with a record of 3-0 she said the other day when she saw me she said “ holy shit you’re ripped” I hope one day to make love to her again get closure, but I know she will never find somebody like me
@@Croy617 boxing is huge, did u recently change careers or something? Girls need stability maybe she thought u couldn’t do it? But wow 3-0 is huge, maybe too much porn? Idk dude, I’m going through it too ur a beast
@@Luke-gs6kz I have my own company, she cheated on me while she was on vacation with her mom and our daughter, while I was working making money, 2 weeks she was gone and I had better $8,000, I think the guilt got to her idk man
What if the dumpee started No Contact 3 weeks late?
What if you are the person who "destroyed it" and he left you. You are doing everything for yourself to make it right but is it not then my job to put it back together?
Coach, 4 months of no contact. Not much after initially. She reached out with a small happy birthday… I said thanks and happy early bday… went back to no contact. 5 days later and I still didn’t reach out for her bday. Now she’s mad I didn’t reach out to her. She posted on her social media. I think she thinks I should have reached out and now she’s pissed. What do you do? Continue no contract?
Since she broke up with me she likes my instagram posts and some of the stories, what does that mean? I've been in no contact for one month! It's painful but will not reach out to her! I work in a gym and saw that she is flirting with another guy, she told me about him months ago, i didn't do anything. Is this a sigh that she will not come ir reach out ?
It's been 6 months. I went into no contact immediately and there was no months and months of buildup for her to stop loving me. It was long distance and then I met her in person again and in less than 2 weeks she left and the last message I sent she didn't reply to. She's checked my WhatsApp and telegram status a handful of times since then but has never texted me or reached out or anything. I think it's over and I did nothing wrong. She even said I'm not good for you and that she was really sorry and she thought she was taking all her problems out on me. I don't know what happened. All I know is that she will not talk to me or at least she won't text me or hasn't text me
I guess we the same man. I had this special person. A year ago we were so good together and something happened where she cut all communications and was seeing someone else who later i found out left her less than 3 months. After that we got connected again however i was disappointed when she told me when i asked her if something happened between them in those months, she gave everything to him especially herself. I was held back to fully commit to her even she wanted commitment from me. It took me a month to gather my thoughts if im ready to commit to her fully, and when i did she didnt want it anymore and cut all communication with me. For the whole month of march and two weeks of April i was fighting for her but she gave me cold responses. I stopped everything and recently saw her and approached her after months of not talking and seeing each other. What did i get? Colder responses. Oh well i wish her well and she will always be part of my life and in my heart. Hopefully she takes good care of herself and her family. Azizam
How do you tell if someone has checked your WhatsApp?
@@pattiherland8420 in the status section down below, you will see an eye symbol. Click on it and you will see the list of people who have viewed you.
My ex broke up with me a week before my birthday two weeks ago the day he broke up with me i was pleading and begging to not break up with me he blocked me on his phone so i blocked his number and social media at this point i dont want him back this is the second time he walked out on me
Coach what do you do when they come back if you still want to move forward? I'm on day 3 of no contact and just called me 9 times lmao
I think that doesn't deserve to be taken back at this point. I've really kinda gotten over her in the no contact period. I'd be willing to take the cheese but as for a relationship she would have to do more work than I think she realizes honestly.
Hi Coach, do you think there is a high chanse to get back in this kind of situation: I was in a situationship for 1,5 years. We didnt want to put label on the relationship because the time we met, we both were in a really low period of our time, so we both had many fears and unsures of commitment. In the end, our situationship didnt end short and we started actually act like proper couple. Everything felt fine and the relationship flowed effortlessy. It was imo the best relationship i ever had with someone!
After a year or so, I realized my feeling were deeper than his. I still waited a little bit for the chanse that maybe he would ask me to put a proper label on the relationship we were in. That didnt happen in the end, so then i felt it was time me to move on, or to fix this problem together. I gave him some space to reflect on this, and he got into a conclusion that he is still unsure about me, and he started to feel bad that he is holding me in a relatioship where there is no safety for me.
He also got into a conclusion, that he wants and needs experience life on his own (bacause his 20s were spent battling with depression), and felt like it feels settling too much if he stays with me.
So I let him go and i really wish him for the best. Im ready to battle with my work and improve my life even more. Tbh I even feel a little bit exited about it, even tho i just had the break up.
Our connection was real and we saw each others vulnerabilities. I gave him safety and supported him in good and bads moments. The chemistry was on fire hahah! We had many things in common and things we were interested in.
Do u think there is a high chanse, that after a while he understands how good things were between us? I really would love if he would start to pursuit me, but I will give this situation lay in the universe's hand..🙏
Great video. My fiacee broke me after a 4 years relation, in a great fight she told me to leace here and then i moved from her like 38 days ago, i tried to be talk with her but she ignored me and from then we are in no contact after 32 days, Yesterday from nowere she blocked me from all platforms, and i did not posted any changed of my life or someting...is she moved on....?
Couch i got break up 2weeks before 3rd time i have gone to no contact again she have started seeing my stories but i didn't see her stories but she is posted many stories yesterday she have posted a sad quote i have ingnored it but suddenly she have unfollowed me today I can't understand why she have done this it's any possibility to get her back again is it she trying to move on forever im confused alot please give me a solution.....😢
What if he never texts after a month of No contact?
What about the dumper who was cheated on? I still struggle and can't quite figure out why I'm mourning even though I was done dirty...
That’s a bit different, if anything they need to be begging you for a chance
Broke up with the girl a month ago. Changed my mind and want to make it work. She said she didn’t know what she wanted. Texting and visits were getting short and late responses. I’m 2 days into no contact rules but her freakin birthday is in a week! Am I really not going to text happy birthday or get a gift or hang out? This has stumped me Coach Blac! What do I do?
Just let it be and stay strong king
You are amazing thank you
This exactly describes what my avoidant ex behaved like after he dumped me , loved me one week , the next week he finished with me . I immediately went in to no contact ( was difficult! ) but I stuck it out . Within 3 weeks we was liking all my Facebook posts ( this was a new behaviour) , I absolutely knew he was trying to get my attention, I didn’t react , I stuck rigidly to no contact , 9 weeks later he finally caved in and started messaging me . We met up for dinner , I quickly realised he hasn’t changed , but rather that he was slightly jealous I appeared to be moving on and enjoying myself in the process , I felt a shift of power at that point . I’m now back in no contact , not really sure how to handle him if he comes back again though , any tips or advice would be welcome .
i didnt actually watch the video but from experience of being the dumper or being dumped heres what i can say: as the dumper i felt like i could do better without her and that the grass would be greener on the other side, but then soon i realized i miss her and nobody could ever take her place but im not the one who went back at first for fear of getting hurt, she came back which made me happy, same relationship but this time i am the one beinf dumped, my pov is that she’s overwhelmed and feels like its not beneficial to her anymore so she left me, ik it sounds toxic but thats how everyone feels when they dump someone, im doing no contact but not before a week of tryinf to get her back, the dumper doesnt care how you feel and they take you for granted at the time, depends on the situation but if they truly miss u and love u they would wanna try again, but if they dont, then they wont reach out and no contact allows you to first find yourself while also potentially attracting your ex back which is what im trying now
Hi coach, Why is he calling me from different numbers after I've done no contact and have 🚫 him? I don't have social media. He's caught on camera coming over to my home unannounced? I was at home but never answered the door and hes caught going on the side and in the back of my home looking around too. The neighbors saw him as well. Wassup with that ish?
Does this apply with anger? He blocked me a month after I already blocked him. But I think he saw me on the ring at his mother’s house.. I was genuinely happy, he probably heard her say how good and beautiful I looked.. then I noticed I was blocked on everything…
I just blocked my ex thru no contact bc he only kept giving me bread crumbs. We had been in no contact for just 15 days. I do not know if I did right blocking him...? I never answered to his bread crumbs.
Do what you feel is right. Trust yourself
Nice hat
My situation is a tricky one. My fiancé and I got into a big fight which resulted in me getting arrested for domestic assault. Nothing crazy happened, things just got out of hand. We had been together for over 5 years. We have had problems over the years, but we love each other dearly and were hands down each others best friend. We also have a child together which further complicates things. I'm forced to have no contact with her for 2 months do to the arrest. There are three weeks left. During this time, I've worked diligently on becoming a better man. I know there is a lot we both need to work on, but I would love to work things out. She has told my lawyers that she's not wanting to reconcile though. Should I continue the no contact even after the 2 months of court ordered no contact is up? Or should I apologize for my wrong doings, tell her that I still love her, and suggest that we go on a date and see how we feel about the future.
What about 5 months of no contact? 😢
My ex broke up with me last week, we still love each other but circumstances weren’t great, her family didn’t like me, but we still talk everyday and have met up 3 times for sex now, I’ve tried cutting it off but she keeps coming back and is very in and out when it comes to meeting up now, what should I do?
HI Coach Black, i am stuck in 2yrs craziness with my ex, when I am still tested by ex, and yes I have to admit, that I begged and chased...please tell me when I will in no contact after 2yrs could it help us? I dont know what to do :(. Thank you.
NC for over 1week after chasing him hard for 3week. He sent me Random links to Twitter posts. But never asked any questions. Then he called me a few days later. I ignored the calls and didn’t return. He called again a few days later. I answered and asked he asked if I was okay. I told him I am fine and he asked me if I am sure to which I responded yes. we ended the call after that. Few hours later he sent me a news article. Then I woke up today to another news article. I have been ignoring the articles as he hasn’t said anything or asked any questions. What does this mean?
Is he trying to bait me into chasing him?
Hey Coach do you have a video where you're talking about a dumper completely disappearing after breaking up and saying to never bother them again ? It's been a month , still no contact, I don't think I'm getting her back.
going through this now, 4 weeks since i was dumped, she is 60 soon, and had stress from her job and other factors, i think hormones as well. just erupted about everything one weekend, sick of her life routine, and i was involved in that, some of the outbursts she was saying allsorts about everything, midlife crisis maybe. you cant just turn you feelings off like that, although with all those factors i mention, some can, women are complicated at the best of times. its as if ive murdered somebody, all very strange. just have to wait this one out, not done the proper no contact yet, shes very hot and cold when i do contact her. but won't entertain talking about the relatonship at all, thats when it kicks off. so i'm at a loss as to what to do. her family not sure whats up with her. see what happens.
I recently broke up with my ex but he checked out of the relationship since May/June I’m trying to get over the relationship but hit hurts like hell!!! Recently he posted a picture of me on twitter and I’m reaching out to him to ask him why he posted me on his twitter account he does not respond to me. He has blocked me from contacting him. In my mind I’m ready to let the relationship go but emotionally it hurts I don’t know what to do especially with him recently posting a picture of me on his only social media page like whyyyyyyyy
What if you were dumbed for somebody else in a situationship which develeped out of a friendship? I made a trip to a foreign country and she went dating somebody else because she said she wasn't sure i love her.
Hi, he broke up with me in March, he told me horrible things, that he was sure of the separation, that he wouldn't come back and I automatically made zero contact, a month later I sent voice messages with some things I needed to say to go on in peace and I was the lightest possible without blame or blame, he responded kindly but without further conversation on both sides. From March 31st I continued my life, I traveled in April to Milan and in June to Malta (always in total silence) and during the trip to Malta he came to leave a like on my Instagram photo from my holiday (note that I automatically left it unfollowed and I removed it from my followers right after he finished), I continued and remain silent but now in July I noticed that he took the like off my photo. But Im silent 💪🏼 What can I draw as a conclusion from this action? thanks. I love the content 👌🏼🙏🏼
Are there any scientific studies supporting this?
2 days ago she breaks up with me she said we have different personality and thinking and we in contact for 7 months and she knew my personality from the beginning then why she gave me the time and space to go deep with her and now she realized we are different?? Idk what's wrong
🤷🏾♂️Y do narcs call your mother if you go NoContact?