@@stevenlewin4129 if you haven’t experienced that specific thing yourself, it won’t make sense to you, & will seem like an oxymoron... but for those of us that experience it during flashbacks, it’s the most accurate description possible😉
You are 100% correct . Especially when you zone out whilst in a conversation and people just look at you confused and turn their head around to see what your looking at . It’s so bad
One of the many difficulties of PTSD is having such intense sensory experiences, and then struggling to communicate those experiences in words. It seems that most language is cruelly inadequate, and we find ourselves trapped in a glass box without a voice. Oh, it isn't that we are silent--because we scream and scream from the inside of our bodies, from inside this clear, glass specimen box, where we are on display, but entirely misunderstood. It's just that the screams echo over and over inside of us, yet to our horror, our mouths have been sewn entirely shut. In this twisted, macabre theater, nobody in the audience can even see the thread weaving in and out of our tightly drawn lips. They don't know. We just look plastic, indifferent, mechanical. Let us out! Dear God, please, break the glass and let us out!
@@Snowbever everyone that has ptsd has a different reaction and undermining the way some people feel about their specific event is counterproductive and I also have to say that you probably dont suffer from this debilitating, crushing, mind and body altering condition and as a person who suffers from this if you dont have something productive or comforting to say keep your comments to yourself. This person took guts to put this video out and I for one appreciate it
@@xalvira I just saw that my comment has 159 likes and 5 comments, but RUclips never notified me of any of this until your reply, Taylor. Thank you, to everyone, because so often I think that I have important things to say, but but live in a world full of people who aren't listening. Thank you for listening, really. It means everything to me.
I actually don’t remember my trauma (my doctor thinks it’s a repressed memory) so I don’t get the visual aspects of the trauma. I just feel emotionally really scared and overwhelmed and I often have the thought of “I wanna go home” even if I’m already at home. So basically I feel like I’m in the headspace I was during my trauma, but I don’t see anything in my mind’s eye. I also get really bad hyperarousal, especially if I can’t get away from a trigger. One example I can think of is when I was at my grandparents house and their dog wouldn’t stop barking. One of my triggers is sudden loud noises (like balloons popping and dogs barking) and there was no way for me to get away from the dog. It didn’t help that it was really humid outside and I had to pretend everything was fine. My hyperarousal that day got so bad that filtered water tasted too strong and metallic on my tongue. It felt like the world was turned up too high. It was too loud and too bright. Even the slightest smells burned my nostrils. My hair felt sharp against my skin. I described it to a friend I texted throughout the experience as: “I want to explode. Not like I want to scream or yell or anything. Just explode. Like, kaboom. But not in a suicidal way?” So that’s my experience with PTSD, I guess
I don’t have PTSD, but that sounds a lot like my Hyperesthesia when I get overwhelmed by all the physical sensations. Just this feeling of being so completely frustrated and done with the whole experience I wish my body would just explode and get it over with.
This is quite similar to what I feel like when I’m having a sensory overload (I don’t have ptsd but autism) so it’s cool to see two completely different disorders have similar features :D
thank you for being the voice that I don't know how to be. I have C-PTSD... It's cost me almost all my friendships.. my relationship.. everything. all I have is literally the clothes on my back.. and it's hard because I'm a single mom of 3 a d the world expects me to be "normal" all the time. thank you for being the voice I can't be.. speaking of things that have got to be incredibly difficult for you.. you're making a difference in this world. may you be blessed.
+Monica Kline we're in this together, friend ❤️ I hope that someday it won't be such a rare thing to come across someone else with c-ptsd, cause we'll be having more conversations about it
Monica Kline stop being so dramatic bruh u don’t gotta go like I cri... Everytiem... It’s so bad.... My pop tart died.... Like bruh what’s with all the skipping and paragraphs
Monica Kline I have ptsd too and struggle with some of these things that you have said I also tend to cut myself off from all my friends because of the anxiety I get and I’ve lost a lot of friends too because of this people just tend to think I’m a bit weird and anti social but they don’t really know what’s going on inside are heads !
I had a flashback in a fabric store because someone slammed a bolt of fabric onto a table and the noise was very triggering, I remember thinking “really why now”
I ended up developing PTSD after my dad passed. I always explain it to people like this. It's like watching a movie reel on repeat in your head of that traumatic event over and over.
I find it vaguely familiar to nostalgia. Smells or tastes will trigger it. Like a bad version of reminiscing about some cool day on the beach with your family and those emotions you had... only your brain turned into the devil incarnate, and you really don't want to be remembering whatever it is because those emotions are the fucking worst, and fuck you brain!!! Seriously this video made me feel better. Thanksx
My boyfriend and I got into a slight argument and he witnessed my first ptsd flashback and it’s really annoying bc it over comes you and you can’t really have a trigger word bc it happens so fast and paralyses you and you only think about that one things, then after is just dissociation
sucks cuz ill be having a super deep conversation with someone and brain decides to loop then i lose track and people think im bored or ignoring them when im really just spacing out in a memory
you did a good job describing it, i get a variety, emotional fbs where i only feel the emotion, physical doby memories or flashbacks where i just feel pain and then i have the images you describe being in the minds eye. it seems everything that should be together as one memory has been compartmentalized or shattered so there are just a bunch of pieces to multiple puzzles all mixed up together
Absolutely, As a survivor with PTSD I agree with everything you are saying. I would also like to let you know that that is one of the running theories about how to treat PTSD through Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR). During sessions of EMDR the therapist will tell you to think about specific parts of your trauma, while having you do a task ranging from looking left and right in a pattern to using clickers to engage both sides of the brain. This in theory causes the pieces of the trauma to be defragmented and the brain can complete the processing and allow it to enter long term memory. Once entered into long term memory the individual is not re-experiencing the trauma and attempting to process it, they are able to recall it as a being an event that happened in the past and is not currently happening thus reducing the symptoms of PTSD. Also if you have certain triggers that you feel as though are too powerful, try exposure therapy!!!
I second Nina Yee, that’s very nice of you. The channel Psyche2Go has some very helpful videos too. It’s helped my parents understand my C-PTSD and GAD much better than I’ve been able to explain. I’ve been watching some of the various PTSD channels and I like this channel a lot too. She’s very kind in how she hosts her shows. I think of myself as an easily startled woodland creature because of the C-PTSD. I’m sure some others with the condition would agree they feel the same. So, it’s very calming and helpful that she has a gentle, kind manner. (*Edited to correct my misspellings.)
I thought I didn't have flashbacks because the only descriptions of it i see sometimes are from war veterans. but my trauma is so different from war trauma i just hardly relate, but thats also the kind of trauma i hear about constantly. every time someone explains PTSD to me (like i need it explained to me?) they give me the vet example. It totally kills me.
Yea, I get that it’s because ptsd was recognized first as shell shock and I found out it was recognized because of the Vietnam war because they were being treated like bad guys because it wasn’t for freedom like the other world wars, I found that out last year and likely they got the respect they deserve which was most likely before I was born, but other than that, other traumas should be addressed and emotional flashbacks cuz I don’t hear about them a lot, just visual and it can make people feel heard and also finding out somethings wrong helps people understand their problems and how to cope and get better and get help, which it obviously doesn’t happen in one day tho but it’s worth it, also most people with ptsd weren’t in the war, or army and most were women which is probably suprising to some people since people see ptsd as someone who was in the war and women weren’t in the war back then so that’s why I think people would be suprised by that
I had absolutely no idea those were flashbacks! I have those ALL the time, but I thought it was a different kind of PTSD. I never thought I could have ptsd bc I didn’t experience flashbacks , but I thought those were a lot more vivid and real than what I experience. Can flashbacks look different for anyone? Does the definition of flashback vary from person to person?
+Noah Bradford from my understanding, it can vary. I find that flashbacks on tv are pretty unrealistic, but some people apparently do reenact their trauma. But a lot of people I've talked to have the same type of flashbacks as I do
I don't show any symptoms of PTSD but i remenber someone punched me in the stomach and i got a really bad flashback a quick image.but this is the first time it happened to me i'm not haunted with that trauma so i guess i'm okay
Look up the difference of emotional vs visual flashbacks. Visual is what the media usually depicts. Its a loss of sense of reality, you visually start hallucinating and usually have auditory hallucinations. These vary depending on the severity. Emotional flashbacks contain an emotional hallucination for lack of a better term. Where you feel the exam same emotions as when the event was at its peak, and/or the physical sensations. You don't have a loss of a sense of reality, but can react to people differently. I can't go to sleep without adjusting myself so I don't have an emotional flashback where I physically feel like I am being raped again, and have the same emotional reaction. I often have to try and direct those flashbacks to get to sleep. Its particularly troublesome when you are somewhere in public and you suddenly feel like someone is rubbing up against you and penetrating you. You know its not happening, and people may notice something is wrong, but you can't just say "Oh, my organs hurt because I feel like there is a dick currently entering and exiting me because my cousin used to beat and rape me". You might get a few awkward stares.
@@cyansius3950 im so sorry that happened to you thats awful. As you might see in my earlier comment, idk if what i experience are actually flashbacks but I really relate to you on the sleep thing. Ive never seen someone else say that before too. Its very hard for me to sleep on my back without getting nightmares or experiencing what I think might be "flashbacks but not really" as well.
I'm a South Korean Dude and i don't know if i REALLY have severe PTSD, but my brain sometimes brings me some bad part of my childhood whatever i feel happy or not. It's mostly about being bullied, stalked, making *HUGE* mistakes and facing family issues even. Sadly i remember them clearly than positive ones... I'm trying to be happy right now. Relying on my best friends and such. But oh my, it's NOT easy. I'm just glad that i'm still breathing, watching this video. And speaking of Huge Mistakes, 3 months ago, it was a hot summer day, i searched up some gory pics on the web because i wanted to chill myself out... But honestly i have no idea why i did it, but proceeded anyways. Eventually found the pic that *haunted* me when i was a kid. It was so sudden and scrolled down quickly as possible, but it was too late. It already carved me deeply. I had to live like hell because of returning of flashback. Never talked to my family, stayed up until 5 am, struggled for 2 months. Yes, i know that i brought this on myself and wasn't careful what i was doing... But it's far too late and i'm so regretful right now... Ironically, i really like some horror pics and designs. I really do!(Hence i play Doom often) However... Certain things, especially something from my childhood creeps me out and traumatizes me. Although i like such genre, i'm not gutsy enough. It's not a big deal, and others have had worse! That is true... If only i was happy and positive, tho. Sorry for off-topic rambles. I really appreciate your detailed video. Please keep up the good work!!
This was a very educational video - i'm trying to write a book about someone who has PTSD, and im doing as much research as i can before i get to start writing
The way you discribe it, with the smells that trigger, those are the strongest for me. Sounds and sights are strong as well. My friends with has says" I've had trama and I'm fine". Trama and complex trauma aren't in the same galaxy! Thank you, I have needed you and your channel for a long time!
Im so happy i came across this because i dont know anyone else who suffers from ptsd because of withnessing the loss of a loved one this helps so much to know someone has the same issues as me
I know I'm a bit late but I just found your channel. I just got done watching this video and I just want to say thank you. My friends have been asking me about it because they are actually concerned, (which surprises me), and I showed them your video and a few of them were about to cry, so thank you because you were able to describe something I couldn't so thank you. I have PTSD from 11 years of physical abuse from my step dad. I will have a flashback 5 or 6 times on a good day. I get really tense and my mind gets confused between what's happening around me and the memory that the trigger brought up. It's a terrifying experience for me and I have become violent from it on occasion. I zone out, I'll watch what's happening outside of my body sometimes, and at times I will loose moments throughout my day. I know that you probably won't read this but if it helps someone who goes through a similar thing to know that they are not alone then I think I helped. So thank you.
I just had a multiday panic attack (Didn't know what they were). I have complex PTSD from a lifetime of serious chronic health issue Trama. I started, having trouble breathing, passing out, raised blood pressure, sweats, dizziness, tremors, severe convulsions and really thought I was dying. I started self treating my imagined condition until it got so bad that I went to the ER. It took the ER, my dad, and a friend to convince me it was all in my head. Now, that I reconize this all the attacks of low blood sugar in the past(So I thought) were panic attacks on a smaller scale. Wow, these attacks are really understated.
I stopped at 2:33 because I was crying from the moment you mentioned a clip looping. This is the first time I’ve heard something close to what I experienced a lot all day everyday. Thank you for this video. I needed a good cry.
yes I have had emotional flashbacks, my brain goes into survival mode, hyper vigilance, extreme agitation, sensory overload, ie down the rabbit hole I go,
I get these constantly. Several per day. Kinda frustrating when I'm sick of thinking of what they're about. Anyway, I've described them as like having a nightmare, but when you're awake. Or kind of like a daydream, like when you were in grade school - you zone out staring out the window at birds or whatever, and then the next thing you know, the teacher calls on you to answer the question, and you don't know what to say because you weren't paying attention. The last couple minutes are just a blur to you, but during that time, you were re-visiting those situations. Only difference is, staring out the window at birds is kind of cathartic. PTSD flashbacks can make you angry, sad, etc.
I have 3 different cases of PTSD. You can laugh at the one last night if you like. I broke my leg 2 years ago and had 3 surgerys to save it , so I bruised it yesterday morning, and after I fell asleep I got up at 3:00 AM yelling I BROKE MY LEG , I CAN'T WALK , HELP ME TO THE CAR !!!! After a shower to clean off the sweat I sat and laughed at my self to chill out. Sad , but I worked that one out to be nothing more than a bad dream. It sucked though and I hope no one goes through it.
ReviewCam : I'm sorry, I should have stated in my first comment that I use comedy / laughter to help me through some of my problems. I can be pretty open about almost anything that's happened to me , and I'm willing to encourage anyone that can benefit from my view of my self that way to laugh with me. I hope you didn't take offense to my first message. I do take it seriously and even have gotten help for the other 2 things. ( Sexualy abuse as a 10 - 14 yearold and getting shot in the back by a poacher ). I won't let it stop me. sometimes it can mess up a day. and at 47 I'm still working on it. Hope this finds you well my friend. Take care.
For me, I have different kinds of flash backs. I think I rarely get the kind of visual flash backs I used to get where its like, I get triggered and then its like a tunnel and it feels like my entire reality is now becoming the place I was in the past where the trauma happened. It sort of feels like on a daily basis I get bits and pieces of shit every day. A lot of the time its just me thinking im a child / acting like a child, acting child-like? Not always seeing images but feeling a lot of horrible feelings / body sensations that are from the trauma, that is huge. I can feel like that pain all day every day. Sometimes I have body memories where I can literally feel the traumatic thing happening again on my body. Visual flashbacks happen in quick succession for me, sometimes ill just keep getting flashes of horrifying things, images of terrible things, one after the other for a while. I see the effects of CPTSD now a lot in my relationships and how it affects my identity and how I view the world and other people. Every day I wake up terrified of being alive.
My flash back is sound a voice,a door opening then I get scared and my heart races real fast. My triggers are a lot. It all depends on the day. What I saw or heard. I got shot 5times in my home. And now I struggle with trying to just be normal if that makes sense. My life is my home now. I get scared if people walk toward me. Night time is hard for me cause I think about my situation more at night. So sleeping is a problem for me cause I'm always watching my door to make sure no one comes in.
B.B Designs/Photography I was pistol whipped/beaten and shot at but he was charged with attempted murder so I now I feel like someone is going to kill me at night especially in the car because I was in the car with the killer
My flashbacks are very similar to yours. Something triggers me and it’s like the outside world doesn’t exist, it’s just me and my brain. I re-experience the same emotions I had during the trauma and it plays over and over again in a loop, just like you said. Usually I end up in fetal position somewhere because I lose control of my body. My hands also tremble a TON. I thought I had Parkinson’s the first time I had a flashback because the hand tremors were so bad. Fortunately, I only have these flashbacks about 1-4 times a month, so I can only imagine what it’s like for you to have to go through so many every day. I sincerely hope you’re able to overcome this and live a life free of this awful stuff. The fact you’re able to talk so openly about it on camera shows that you’ve already come such a long way already and are stronger than you know!
Thank you for sharing this. I live with C-PTSD and for me it depends on the time of the year. I can go months without any issues but suddenly it will hit me like a bus and for many months I hope you are recovering
What I get with my PTSD. Is I'll get the flashbacks of that night I'll feel EVERYTHING that I felt from that night, hear everything from that night, smell everything from that night. I'll space out alot like how you do while also being hyper aware of everything around but not able to do much about it until I come back. Then when I come back I'm super foggy headed for a bit. What triggers me most seems to be talking about it. Even now its triggering me and I've legit sat here for a soild 10 minutes just trying to get out what I wanna say but I feel that its important so I'm trying to push through. Hospitals also trigger me along with ambulances and sirens. I see or hear them and will go into an episode of either seeing that night or hearing sounds from that night. I've also recently started developing night terrors where I'll have nightmares of that night and wake up screaming and crying. It's weirding me out though cause I never had night terrors when he first passed....he passed almost two years ago. I'm thinkin it's probably from other stresses in my life that my brain is just taking and turning into that one specific trauma? I dont know? I'm glad I'm not alone in this though!
Wait I’m crying. Finally. Someone explained exactly how I feel. I’ve been diagnosed for a while but never had I heard someone explain it exactly as I experience a flashback. I don’t feel alone. Thank you
so im late on this video like all the other comments are a year old but someone can finally put it into words. ive been through many different traumas and most people do think flashbacks are like how they're portrayed on TV but most of the time I do get them like you do, very rarely is it kind of a "clip" i don't know how to describe it. and then auditory ones are very strange like ill be sitting in class then ill start hearing really loud yelling (i was around a lot of abuse) and i start looking around because sometimes i can't tell if others are hearing it because at school people do get in fights and sometimes the voices aren't as clear so it is really hard to describe im sorry if this doesn't make any sense but yes, thank you for making this.
Thank you for this video. I know this video is kind of old, but it was helpful for me to hear someone describe a flashback, it makes me feel less dramatic
Well I don't have flashbacks that often but like normally depending on what it is about my body just shuts of and like half of brain is awake replaying the moment and i'm just like when is it over please please and then it's like waking up from a nightmare
Im a nursing student studying mental health and thank you so much for sharing! This is very hard to understand for someone who hasn't been through it. I appriciate you. Thank you so much. You are a strong soul and I wish you so much healing
Thank you for sharing. It's very courageous and very helpful. Thank you for clarifying that flashbacks are in your mind's eye. Until really recently I thought flashbacks had to be literal hallucinations and so I didn't realize they were flashbacks and when my therapist started calling them such, I got kind of confused. Mine aren't repetitive quite like that, but I can relate so much with what you've said. The flashback space-out, yes, where you keep talking but you wonder just how obvious it is that you mentally were transported to another time. I've never head anyone else understand this before. It's so nice to hear someone else talk about it.
+Jane May I thought the same thing (about hallucinations) for the longest time, too! I think that's just how we see it on TV, which makes sense cause it's so hard to understand in the first place, nevermind visually represent it. I'm glad I'm not alone in having flashbacks, and that you aren't alone in it either ❤️
I've been dealing with PTSD for at least 25 years. It's not fun. You discribed it well. Some days the triggers are less some bring me right back like it just happened. The triggers can be a thought, lyrics in a song, words spoken or read or just pop in my head. They can be sounds, smells, pictures, flashes of memories.
This made me feel so much better that I’m not alone in this, I just cried & went through an episode before I watched this! You helped me gain strength in realizing I’m not alone. I have ptsd & the flashbacks take me back as if I’m there again, it gets so hard to snap out of it! My mom is trying her hardest to understand still. I’m going to share your video in hopes she can finally understand!
Hi, thank you for making this video. I just almost drown in the river trying to help my nephew drawning. We were safe in the end, and it didn't become a big deal, or I tried to not make it a big deal because I didn't want him to feel it was, maybe for myself too. But I've having flashback loops just like you explained. I'm trying not to think about it but it just pops out like every minute. I think it's also because it hasn't been much time past yet. I wanted share this to someone who understand the similar situation and I came across this video. I wanted a word " I understand." He seems he is fine now. He kept playing in the river safely after that too. It only happened to me today, but I can under stand better about how the flashbacks are like. and I can guess how hard and sad and stressful they are for you. Also I'm so proud of you trying to explain them so cheerfully. Thank you so much！ ❤️
When PTSD was at its worst for me I was literally hallucinating things related to the event, colours, the smell of the room, pain in my stomach, voices, etc. it made school very difficult and I underachieved academically
Came across your channel today and I love it! My boyfriend told me that he has PTSD because of a childhood trauma. I never came across people who had it until i met him 1 1/2 years ago. I wanted to know more about it and read a lot of things and watched a lot of videos but none of the ones I saw explained it as good as you did. He does not talk about it that much... eventhough I know that everybody experiences PTSD differently, it is still good to hear it from the point of view of a person who deals with PTSD. Videos like this not only help people who suffer from it, but also people close to them. Your other video "What not to say to someone with PTSD" also helped me to be more sensitive and to pay more attention. Thank you so much for helping me understand PTSD more. Keep on the good work, because your videos are amazing. I hope that your channel gets bigger and gets more attention, because you deserve it!
From the first 20 seconds you completely explained how I feel. It’s really hard to imagine it day-to-day. I’m sure some are dramatic but it’s difficult to trust movies. I appreciate this video a lot
Flashbacks for me are like the rest of the world kind of goes on mute while it’s happening. Like I jumped into a pool of water and then when it stops, it’s like surfacing from the water. I lose track of conversations if that’s what’s going on or I’ll forget what happened during the part where the flashback is happening. I’ve watched three of your videos so far and I’m so happy that I found your channel. I’ve never heard of someone else who got PTSD from watching a loved one die of a prolonged illness and I’ve had several people tell me that EVEN THOUGH I’ve been medically diagnosed with this, it’s not real because “you can’t just get PTSD from someone dying”. I will be watching the rest of your videos for sure.
If those are flashbacks what do you call it when you feel like you are involved in the situation right then? My most significant flashbacks happen when someone does something similar to something someone has done in the past. While I know I'm in my current situation it FEELS like I am in the past situation that caused trauma and that feeling like... infects the whole situation and I'm treating the other person as if they had harmed me or were going to harm me. And they're left there thinking I'm accusing them of being a monster and I'm acting like a straight psychopath and I actually end up hurting them instead of them hurting me. And I end up being the abusive person. I also ruminate on different things the way you describe that also cause me to dissociate especially when it reminds me of trauma but I don't really consider those flashbacks. My flashbacks are so much more horrible than I can actually express here but it's all just feelings. No visuals or auditory stuff. I was clinically diagnosed several years ago.
I’m sorry you’re suffering, I’ve been in that place as well and it’s unbearably heavy to live with the past piling on top of the present. I hope this day is treating you gently ❤️
I was diagnosed with ptsd a few months ago, and this is very similar to what I experience, thank you for discussing it because it made me feel so validated ❤️❤️
Thank you for the warning, choosing to not watch the rest of the video at this time because I'm actually doing ok today and want to keep that going lol. Your description is spot on! I never even thought that I had PTSD because all I ever knew about it was very dramatic versions of it on TV. When I was diagnosed I was like woah this all makes so much sense
For me my flashes backs are like pieces adding up until the picture is the pain I felt from said sensory functions that I felt after my brother unexpectedly died from his coach ran him to death. It was deemed man slaughter because he knew that when my brother asked to take a break and his body was in clear distress that the coach forced my brother to keep on running, which he ended up running until he couldn't run anymore, not breath, or just move in general because his heart was overexerted. Anyways the flashbacks for me are like pieces because it seems like when I get my flashbacks there are things that really stood out to me either because at the time my mind was just trying to grab onto something that made sense, or something that was so intense in that moment. It was all so fucking intense during and after but the things I remember the most was the panic in my father when he ran us to the hospital. That sense of we don't know why my brother was in the hospital, but it's not a broken bone it's something much worst. My dad is just as confused and as frantic as I am. Then arriving into the E.R. to hear blood curdling crying as my mom is yelling, crying at the top of her lungs in agony and then the horrible realization that this was going to be life changing for the worst. Then to look at the nurses as I was too afraid to cry as the nurses horrified, and hopeless as my mother and yet could never feel the same pain unless they too lost a healthy 12 year old on what was suppose to be a normal day. Then to peer in the room where about five doctors were around this body, I didn't have to see the face I knew it was him. Hearing the defibrillator fire off, but no heart beat, no goodbyes just the screech of a deadline. To then turn away in horror feeling like my entire world was gone in an instant. For my parents to come out of a nearby room crying, then to go into said room myself and start to screech in pain the things I didn't want anyone to see but they heard a 10 year old cry out an equally blood curdling cry of true loss and pain. There's a lot more to the story, things that have gone on for months even years after my brother's death. The men who killed my brother helping the school system to cover up the murder, and doing so successfully. The town either hating us, or being on our side because they knew that we were good people. And the fact I couldn't live a normal life after what happened to my brother which to some people might seem like no big deal, you should have been able to live a normal life after that. Which honestly only happened after I had an opportunity to go to another school an hour away to feel like I could live a somewhat normal life and even then there was a few hitches. It still feels at times I can't ever be normal, either from the fact that my parents don't want to lost their only child and can be over protective at times, or even the fact that certain trigger, or dreams either remind me of the fact my brother is not living life by my side and he's forever stuck in the past never the present, I'll get jealous easily if I see my cousins relying on each other like me and my brother use to; even just the fact that good memories eventually turn sour because of that traumatizing event that ended it all... It's earth shattering in every sense of the word, and when he died a lot of people noticed a part of me died as well. Which when I heard a person actually say that to me it verified I' not the only to have seen the grueling change as well. Hopefully writing out my frustrations to this community will help with some of the dreams I've been having lately that have been confusing and painful to me. Most of said dreams are having a lot to do with my PTSD, and my fear of losing those I currently love which has originated from this traumatic event. I know my comment is a jumbled up mess, but it's hard for me to recount everything that I not only went through by my family so I'm just probably going to end it here.
SealAwayHearts I lost my brother too. God bless you. I read every word and felt the pain and loss you described. My brother’s murderer was not charged. I never got to say goodbye. I felt it all. I don’t like sharing my emotions about it anymore because I feel like everyone is trying to move on healthily and not fall into depression about it so all of my emotions stay stuck inside of me. I find comfort in thinking that he knows I love him and I care. I think about him every single day and I feel guilty any time I’m happy without him but as soon as I get that feeling, I realize I’m thinking of him and I think he knows because the spiritual world is much different. Although morbid, I have found comfort in the thought that we all have to go one day. And the saddest loss is the first loved one to go. They are always the most unexpected and we feel so bad and so guilty that it had to be them. But please take comfort in the idea that his spirit never died. He still exists. His body died. And every good memory you have of him is like him being right there living that moment with you reminiscing. I hope you are better. Take care. ❤️
@@MsChrissyLW "But please take comfort in the idea that his spirit never died. He still exists. His body died." - I think that was just so beautifully stated and wholeheartedly agree. Sending love :)
I’m new to all of this. I had my twin brother pass away. I fell apart. Then my girlfriend of 12 yrs we have 2 girls together started cheating on me. She manipulated me really good telling me everything’s fine. It was 2 months of hell on earth she tortured me and my daughters. She ended up destroying our home and getting arrested for domestic violence. She came home and stopped cheating but now I’m reliving this mess through flashbacks. Everything in this video is true.
It does get repetitive. I will go awhile thinking that I'm handling it well and given myself good healthy outlets and all of a sudden something with happen and im back emotionally and I just want to hide from people and I get very anxious and worried and I start over thinking everything if I'm in front of people and I become really worried that they will notice that inside I'm having a moment where I am just falling apart. Also I get this weird sick feeling that happens to me and for just a few seconds im very nauseous and I need to breath for a moment.
me and my friends have a code word for it, we call it "trauma attack" what it feel like for me is i just freeze and my mind goes blank and all i can see are flashbacks and then i cry hard, its happened a couple times but that really only happens like if someone dose something that triggers me, my main trigger is someone grabbing my throat.
My flashbacks are more emotional triggers. Something happens that triggers emotions that bring me back to traumas and it's almost like i'm almost in that moment again.
For many years I had emotional flashbacks which felt very intense. I would become hyper vigilant with an intense feeling of fear inside of me. I would feel disconnected but hyper aware and of my surroundings. Anything could trigger it - a loud noise, a crowded space or confined space. I discovered ways to regulate my nervous system through yoga, breathwork, somatic exercises and somatic experiencing. My healing started though when I met someone who helped me co regulate my nervous system. For me, it was my husband. From there I discovered the other modalities for self regulation. I have been totally symptom free for 20 years. I had had symptoms of derealisation and panic/anxiety for 20 years after a traumatic event left me with undiagnosed ptsd. I now realise how important it is to understand the autonomic nervous system and finding ways to regulate. The vagus nerve is key! Polyvagal theory is a must read modality for anyone with ptsd and associated symptoms. Also look into somatic experiencing. The body holds our trauma!X
I think you did a great job of explaining this! And yes! Your flashbacks greatly resemble mine 😊 Thank you for making this video- it really helps people know they are not alone. Blessings and love 💖
You've literally described my life to a tee. They're like videos on repeat! It's freaking awful and I feel useless. Always. And the space-i-ness(sp) varies depending on how long it "looped". I get both sight and sounds. I don't feel like I went back through time and I'm watching everything through a 3 person view. Most big life things, like losing a loved one, will stick with me and never go away. I call my loops "Daydreams". They happened often, but I never really went to a therapist or counted how many of them I have at a time, so I couldn't really go into depth about that. (Not that I would, publicly, anyhow.) I just felt like I need to share my experiences with you. ☺️
Your description matches mine, pretty much. I hate that loop. I have gone for years without them and then they reappear. I no longer have nightmares thank goodness. I love your sharing as it helps others understand and for those of us who battle PTSD it helps to know we are not alone.
It really really sucks when I get my flashbacks, I pretty much relive the moments that happened on November 14 2013 when our dairy barn burnt, we had put sawdust into the haybarn (upper level of the barn) since we didn’t have the normal bedding for the animals and we were starting chores at 5:30 at night when I could smell a fire type smell mixed with wood, i let mom and dad know and we looked outside no neighbors had a bonfire and the wind was blowing away from the barn so it wasn’t the wood stove for the house, I then got sent into the haybarn and came down not seeing anything minutes after me coming down dad went up and tried putting a bale of hay out of fire that when he gave it enough oxygen it burst into a fireball and the air all around was hot some parts even burning he yelled get back and i and mom ran to the other end of the barn, she called 911 and I got a 5 gallon bucket of water to try to put some bedding that was on fire out that didn’t even help, then my dad fell down the hay chute on fire and ran past me screaming and I ran with him beating his left arm so the fire would go out and stop burning him, after he got out I tried to save some of the animals and make sure nobody else was inside the barn, my dad was airlifted to UW-Maddison burn unit where we lived in Madison for over a month with dad having sustained 2nd and 3rd degree burns to the face hands and most of his left arm, fire trucks and ambulances with lights and sirens on really hurt me bad with sparking flashbacks, when fire trucks go bye I’m instantly back watching the barn burning and hearing the cows screaming inside the barn, when ambulances go by I see my dad on the table inside with the breathing tube in his mouth with mom and the left side and his work boots in front of the table. Sometimes my fidget spinner helps with my PTSD attacks and one time so far I couldn’t even spin it I just held it tight and had to talk about my attack with a manager during work while it was happening, and it’s rare I can talk to anyone during a flashback. My dad,mom, brother and I are still together and closer than ever since that day, my family was so proud when I was Awarded the Bronze Medal of Valor for saving his life during the fire that he videoed my ceremony, and I uploaded it to RUclips as well as video of the fire I took that night. To explain the medal, I am a first lieutenant in the USAF AUXILIARY. My flashbacks are worse at night from 5:30 and on since the fire started then, my family and friends have been very supportive of me in my times of PTSD attacks, even got a medical alert dog tag to wear when out in public. My military buddies will Also talk to me about what PTSD they have to make me feel better. I watched this video due to having woke up from a flashback nightmare and it really helped me calm down.
I only realized I may have PTSD last year. I was sleeping with my grandmother, she fell off the bed and few days later passed away. Now whenever I sleep next to someone and they move slightly, I could be in a deep sleep, I wake up and reach to "safe" them but they are not falling. My heart would raise and I get overwhelmed with that exact dreadful feeling I felt when my grandmother fell. It's been 6 years, I haven't seeked help yet.
my flash backs fully distract me ill get quite and still like im frozen and either hear muffled memories or see something that is similar to what has happend to me ill go back in third person and see one of those memories. heart races and if people move quick behind me things can get bad how i react.
Chris Manning I hear and see them vividly but I’m still sitting in my room. I hear the same thing over and over. I didn’t realize that’s what I was doing until I listened to a song with someone yelling the same thing over and over. I was like “hey that’s what it’s like.”
Oh god, thanks for clarifying this. I know this is a late reply but I was googling around because I was worried I was overreacting about my PTSD. And then you explained how yours worked and I went "those are flashbacks? But I have those all the ti-- ohhhhhhhhhh..." I didn't realize I could live a life without those. thanks so much
I know someone who was in a war in the middle east and sometimes they just go offline for a minute they wont react to anything and stare off to void... it's creepy. When they wake up from that they are really far away feeling
Ah yeah, I believe that's what people refer to as the "thousand yard stare" - when a person does that, they are nowhere near the present moment and it can be uncomfortable not only for us experiencing it, but for those around us. Nobody ever really knows how to react or help haha
I really love how you’ve done this. It’s very tasteful and I feel honest and genuine and not like idk cliche it’s good. This is nice to listen to. I appreciate you and this.
Really emotional!!!. Very intense. I'm there in the moment again. I struggle to breath normally, and tears just flow. I have triggers. For example. An ambulance parked at the doctors surgery!!!!. If I'm in the car park I have to get out!!!!!!. Even if it meant crashing my car. I have to get away from the scene!!!!!. Nightmares. Reenactments of certain events. All centred around 2 events. December finding out my precious friend. My dad was terminal with cancer!!!!!!. Then in January found out my 28yr relationship with my husband was over, as he left to be with my bf. Dad passed in the August...omg. how do I begin to process all this??. PTSD and anxiety are the weights I'm left with. It hard!!!!!!. Getting the right help is hard!!!!, but I must remain, and do remain positive. Some days being harder than others. Thank you for reading xxxx😘
I am 75 and suffer from Complex PTSD. First trauma occurred about 10 yrs. old. I was asked to make a decision both options being extremely traumatic. I froze physically for 8 hours. Basically the rest of my life when I had to make a choice tof one of two people, I would instantly go back mentally and physically to the first trauma. The way It feels like that I accidently stuck my hand in a electric light socket and could not remove it. Fear goes through my whole body. The trauma root is that no one is around to help or cares. It is REAL at the time and takes hours to recover.
It’s something I would definitely bring up with a doctor/therapist if you’re comfortable, because even if it doesn’t seem “serious” it’s still heckin uncomfortable when your brain is trying to work something out like that 💚
I don’t know why, or how, but this is pretty much exactly how my flashbacks feel, though they’re definitely not as frequent as yours. Someone who directly reminds of one event (I knew them at the time) is now at a place that I go to almost daily and every time I see them I get flashbacks, so at the moment they’re happening 5-6 times a day. I hope they do subside eventually, though. More than anything, I hope that dude will just go somewhere else.
Good descriptions. I have severe complex PTSD. Mine can be close to what you describe. Others are way way different. I find certain senses really intense: usually visual, emotional and physical. For example from a few days ago: running down a red carpet spiral staircase with no apparent end. Could feel the carpet. Also wearing white beads broken and tapping on the wall. Could feel the tapping as well as hear it. overwhelming terror of being chased......................whoooooosh I come out of it. There was a lot more but I don't want to trigger anyone. I know the situations meaning but cannot say. Can't remember a darn thing for like an hour after it has completely cleared.
I survived maybe the worst natural disaster of the past 50 years. I lost some of my family and it broke my body. I had terrible ptsd for a few years afterwards. Any trigger would put me into a state of catatonia. Please seek help if you have ptsd. Any major tsunami brings back mine and I immediately call for a therapist.
Thank you for telling those who might be triggered by medical stuff. And I’m so glad you did this video because I get these all the time and I thought that panic attacks were way worse than what was happening to me. You explained this so well.
Thanks so much for sharing! I am a nursing student learning about PTSD, and its so great to get some insight into what it is like to have it! Thanks again :)
Your so accurate. I spent 6 years and 6 tours total in the war. And this is one of the most accurate representations I’ve heard of my situations. Thank you.
I'm glad I found this. I'm 100% my son hit PTSD and he was diagnosed as bipolar. He was in prison for 11 years and he has all those symptoms. He throws up also because he smells things. He repeats loudly the same episode (words) over and over during the day.
Gosh, I hope your flashbacks have diminished somewhat. Mine were constant for the first few years, then over an 8yr period, reduced to a few times a day, sometimes not at all, then I had an intense month recently where they were pretty much constant and now I'm back to a few times a day. Mine are how you described yours.
I'm thankful to have really supportive friends who understand what I go through. I'm normally very friendly and extroverted but when I'm having an episode I'll become silent and pull myself out of reality until their like hey dude you okay? Make someones day and try to talk to them
Thankyou for being vulnerable in order to educate us. :) I was curious about how this really presents more in people and trying to better understand what it’s like.
Girl you are on point! At least for me you are. You described it all PERFECTLY. I range from "good days" where I can have none to "horrible days" where I know I should just hide in bed under the covers(but can't with 4 kids) because EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHING triggers me.
Yes I hear sounds too. Like for example I use to be in programs. Kids use to be restrained including myself and sometimes when a child is screaming I panic, get jumpy or get anxiety as if a peer was being restrained or I was.
I didn't realize that what I experience are flashbacks, but it's pretty much exactly what you described. For me they're mainly emotional flashbacks where I'll get a wave of the worst grief or most gut-wrenching anxiety, but I'll also experience a prominent visual component as well. However, I've never been formally diagnosed with PTSD or C-PTSD.
Has anyone had triggers from remembering a pet they lost? My boyfriend had a dog when he was a kid, and since his family was abusive I think this dog was the only one he was close to, so he’ll start crying hysterically and saying his dogs name sometimes...
My flashbacks are visual. They come out of nowhere and I'm either in the perspective of my mum who died and what she may have been feeling or it's my fear of what happened. It plays in a loop. It's like my mind is a data base and its trying to find a solution to the trauma but its stuck . I just cry and cry and feel like there is no barrier between me and my mum. I'm feeling what she would have been feeling and it overwhelms me so much I can go into deep crisis
Thank you for being the voice that I haven’t been able to be. I have to admit, I laugh and smile a lot; watching your videos. Simply because I can finally relate to someone 💙 thank you again for being that bright light at the end of the tunnel.
I have PTSD from a robbery... ever since losing my mom and kid? my PTSD? has been worse.. everyday my body wakes up immediately triggered by the reality.. my body is so strained without knowing I started doing " Exposure Therapy". Whenever I felt danger was lurking outside? I would go stand where I felt the threat was.. this calms my body and helps it recognize what I am seeing is real, what I am thinking? Is not as bad as it appears. I hope everyone who struggles like I do? You find love and light, and healing!! idk if we ever will have a normal life again, but we can adjust
thank you I'm sorry I couldn't get through this video, your description of a flashback really let me see what was happening to me because I can barely function when it happens.
I could see that this would help explain what flashbacks from PTSD feel like. As someone with PTSD, I have lots of them... But there are times where I actually have a PTSD episode, and the images come in even quicker. It becomes so disorienting and terrible to the point I can only lay on the floor and cry hysterically. I feel like those small and fragile moments are even harder to explain.
I have social anxiety disorder, but i get this too. I have just a few experiences that come in visual loops, but i really struggle with the emotional state and being snappy with those around if something causes me to regress for some reason. I've just recently started to figure out that my random, excessive anger actually just happens when I am in fear, althoughthe situation may not call for it, but reminds me of a situation that did. It is hard to stay grounded, but catching it when you're not is a significant first step. I'm just gonna be watching your vids the rest of the day at work lol
3:25 for skip
When you said you zone out but yet you’re still hyper aware of everything going around you, that is so accurate
M8 zone out and aware mean totally different things (not insulting anyone)
@@stevenlewin4129 if you haven’t experienced that specific thing yourself, it won’t make sense to you, & will seem like an oxymoron... but for those of us that experience it during flashbacks, it’s the most accurate description possible😉
Yeah, it sometimes feels like I'm mentally passing out lol
You are 100% correct . Especially when you zone out whilst in a conversation and people just look at you confused and turn their head around to see what your looking at . It’s so bad
One of the many difficulties of PTSD is having such intense sensory experiences, and then struggling to communicate those experiences in words. It seems that most language is cruelly inadequate, and we find ourselves trapped in a glass box without a voice. Oh, it isn't that we are silent--because we scream and scream from the inside of our bodies, from inside this clear, glass specimen box, where we are on display, but entirely misunderstood. It's just that the screams echo over and over inside of us, yet to our horror, our mouths have been sewn entirely shut. In this twisted, macabre theater, nobody in the audience can even see the thread weaving in and out of our tightly drawn lips. They don't know. We just look plastic, indifferent, mechanical. Let us out! Dear God, please, break the glass and let us out!
Awesomely accurate description. Showing my therapist this.
I’m showing my therapist this. I’m crying, I couldn’t write this into words and I’ve tried for YEARS
That sounds more like depersonalization or derealization to me
@@Snowbever everyone that has ptsd has a different reaction and undermining the way some people feel about their specific event is counterproductive and I also have to say that you probably dont suffer from this debilitating, crushing, mind and body altering condition and as a person who suffers from this if you dont have something productive or comforting to say keep your comments to yourself.
This person took guts to put this video out and I for one appreciate it
@@xalvira
I just saw that my comment has 159 likes and 5 comments, but RUclips never notified me of any of this until your reply, Taylor. Thank you, to everyone, because so often I think that I have important things to say, but but live in a world full of people who aren't listening. Thank you for listening, really. It means everything to me.
I have PTSD and I’ve definitely had moments of “Goddammit, brain, now is not the greatest time for a flashback!”
Same
Fr
Yea…
ptsd flashback feels just like waking up from a nightmare for a long time.
Your explanation is so on point. The “cringe” feeling when it replays again is by far the worst part for me.
I actually don’t remember my trauma (my doctor thinks it’s a repressed memory) so I don’t get the visual aspects of the trauma. I just feel emotionally really scared and overwhelmed and I often have the thought of “I wanna go home” even if I’m already at home. So basically I feel like I’m in the headspace I was during my trauma, but I don’t see anything in my mind’s eye.
I also get really bad hyperarousal, especially if I can’t get away from a trigger. One example I can think of is when I was at my grandparents house and their dog wouldn’t stop barking. One of my triggers is sudden loud noises (like balloons popping and dogs barking) and there was no way for me to get away from the dog. It didn’t help that it was really humid outside and I had to pretend everything was fine. My hyperarousal that day got so bad that filtered water tasted too strong and metallic on my tongue. It felt like the world was turned up too high. It was too loud and too bright. Even the slightest smells burned my nostrils. My hair felt sharp against my skin.
I described it to a friend I texted throughout the experience as: “I want to explode. Not like I want to scream or yell or anything. Just explode. Like, kaboom. But not in a suicidal way?”
So that’s my experience with PTSD, I guess
Ik this is old, but same. I experience the emotions but the memories are mostly gone
Very accurate description of what I feel daily.
Me too, I don't remember most of my childhood lmao
I don’t have PTSD, but that sounds a lot like my Hyperesthesia when I get overwhelmed by all the physical sensations. Just this feeling of being so completely frustrated and done with the whole experience I wish my body would just explode and get it over with.
This is quite similar to what I feel like when I’m having a sensory overload (I don’t have ptsd but autism) so it’s cool to see two completely different disorders have similar features :D
thank you for being the voice that I don't know how to be.
I have C-PTSD...
It's cost me almost all my friendships..
my relationship..
everything.
all I have is literally the clothes on my back..
and it's hard because I'm a single mom of 3 a d the world expects me to be "normal" all the time.
thank you for being the voice I can't be..
speaking of things that have got to be incredibly difficult for you..
you're making a difference in this world.
may you be blessed.
+Monica Kline we're in this together, friend ❤️ I hope that someday it won't be such a rare thing to come across someone else with c-ptsd, cause we'll be having more conversations about it
Hello It's me bruh man up and leave ur damn house stop cryin boi
Monica Kline stop being so dramatic bruh u don’t gotta go like
I cri...
Everytiem...
It’s so bad....
My pop tart died....
Like bruh what’s with all the skipping and paragraphs
Monica Kline I have ptsd too and struggle with some of these things that you have said I also tend to cut myself off from all my friends because of the anxiety I get and I’ve lost a lot of friends too because of this people just tend to think I’m a bit weird and anti social but they don’t really know what’s going on inside are heads !
Monica Kline are you homeless?
I like that metaphor of files being pulled out and loops like a broken record.
yes very much so
I had a flashback in a fabric store because someone slammed a bolt of fabric onto a table and the noise was very triggering, I remember thinking “really why now”
I ended up developing PTSD after my dad passed. I always explain it to people like this. It's like watching a movie reel on repeat in your head of that traumatic event over and over.
The fact that you said 5-20 times a day.... THANK YOU! Your experience is helping me better understand someone I truly care about.
paralyzing
I find it vaguely familiar to nostalgia. Smells or tastes will trigger it. Like a bad version of reminiscing about some cool day on the beach with your family and those emotions you had... only your brain turned into the devil incarnate, and you really don't want to be remembering whatever it is because those emotions are the fucking worst, and fuck you brain!!!
Seriously this video made me feel better. Thanksx
My boyfriend and I got into a slight argument and he witnessed my first ptsd flashback and it’s really annoying bc it over comes you and you can’t really have a trigger word bc it happens so fast and paralyses you and you only think about that one things, then after is just dissociation
sucks cuz ill be having a super deep conversation with someone and brain decides to loop then i lose track and people think im bored or ignoring them when im really just spacing out in a memory
you did a good job describing it, i get a variety, emotional fbs where i only feel the emotion, physical doby memories or flashbacks where i just feel pain and then i have the images you describe being in the minds eye. it seems everything that should be together as one memory has been compartmentalized or shattered so there are just a bunch of pieces to multiple puzzles all mixed up together
This!!!
Absolutely, As a survivor with PTSD I agree with everything you are saying. I would also like to let you know that that is one of the running theories about how to treat PTSD through Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR). During sessions of EMDR the therapist will tell you to think about specific parts of your trauma, while having you do a task ranging from looking left and right in a pattern to using clickers to engage both sides of the brain. This in theory causes the pieces of the trauma to be defragmented and the brain can complete the processing and allow it to enter long term memory. Once entered into long term memory the individual is not re-experiencing the trauma and attempting to process it, they are able to recall it as a being an event that happened in the past and is not currently happening thus reducing the symptoms of PTSD. Also if you have certain triggers that you feel as though are too powerful, try exposure therapy!!!
Researching this because my boyfriend deals with this. This was very helpful, thank you!!!
That is so nice of you. I wish that some of the people in my life took the time to understand me better like this
I second Nina Yee, that’s very nice of you. The channel Psyche2Go has some very helpful videos too. It’s helped my parents understand my C-PTSD and GAD much better than I’ve been able to explain. I’ve been watching some of the various PTSD channels and I like this channel a lot too. She’s very kind in how she hosts her shows. I think of myself as an easily startled woodland creature because of the C-PTSD. I’m sure some others with the condition would agree they feel the same. So, it’s very calming and helpful that she has a gentle, kind manner. (*Edited to correct my misspellings.)
Stellate Galleon Block
I thought I didn't have flashbacks because the only descriptions of it i see sometimes are from war veterans. but my trauma is so different from war trauma i just hardly relate, but thats also the kind of trauma i hear about constantly. every time someone explains PTSD to me (like i need it explained to me?) they give me the vet example. It totally kills me.
Yea, I get that it’s because ptsd was recognized first as shell shock and I found out it was recognized because of the Vietnam war because they were being treated like bad guys because it wasn’t for freedom like the other world wars, I found that out last year and likely they got the respect they deserve which was most likely before I was born, but other than that, other traumas should be addressed and emotional flashbacks cuz I don’t hear about them a lot, just visual and it can make people feel heard and also finding out somethings wrong helps people understand their problems and how to cope and get better and get help, which it obviously doesn’t happen in one day tho but it’s worth it, also most people with ptsd weren’t in the war, or army and most were women which is probably suprising to some people since people see ptsd as someone who was in the war and women weren’t in the war back then so that’s why I think people would be suprised by that
I had absolutely no idea those were flashbacks! I have those ALL the time, but I thought it was a different kind of PTSD. I never thought I could have ptsd bc I didn’t experience flashbacks , but I thought those were a lot more vivid and real than what I experience. Can flashbacks look different for anyone? Does the definition of flashback vary from person to person?
+Noah Bradford from my understanding, it can vary. I find that flashbacks on tv are pretty unrealistic, but some people apparently do reenact their trauma. But a lot of people I've talked to have the same type of flashbacks as I do
I don't show any symptoms of PTSD but i remenber someone punched me in the stomach and i got a really bad flashback a quick image.but this is the first time it happened to me i'm not haunted with that trauma so i guess i'm okay
Look up the difference of emotional vs visual flashbacks.
Visual is what the media usually depicts. Its a loss of sense of reality, you visually start hallucinating and usually have auditory hallucinations. These vary depending on the severity.
Emotional flashbacks contain an emotional hallucination for lack of a better term. Where you feel the exam same emotions as when the event was at its peak, and/or the physical sensations. You don't have a loss of a sense of reality, but can react to people differently.
I can't go to sleep without adjusting myself so I don't have an emotional flashback where I physically feel like I am being raped again, and have the same emotional reaction. I often have to try and direct those flashbacks to get to sleep.
Its particularly troublesome when you are somewhere in public and you suddenly feel like someone is rubbing up against you and penetrating you. You know its not happening, and people may notice something is wrong, but you can't just say "Oh, my organs hurt because I feel like there is a dick currently entering and exiting me because my cousin used to beat and rape me".
You might get a few awkward stares.
@@cyansius3950 im so sorry that happened to you thats awful. As you might see in my earlier comment, idk if what i experience are actually flashbacks but I really relate to you on the sleep thing. Ive never seen someone else say that before too. Its very hard for me to sleep on my back without getting nightmares or experiencing what I think might be "flashbacks but not really" as well.
@@ninayee6361 What was your earlier comment? I don't see your name.
I'm a South Korean Dude and i don't know if i REALLY have severe PTSD, but my brain sometimes brings me some bad part of my childhood whatever i feel happy or not. It's mostly about being bullied, stalked, making *HUGE* mistakes and facing family issues even. Sadly i remember them clearly than positive ones... I'm trying to be happy right now. Relying on my best friends and such. But oh my, it's NOT easy. I'm just glad that i'm still breathing, watching this video.
And speaking of Huge Mistakes, 3 months ago, it was a hot summer day, i searched up some gory pics on the web because i wanted to chill myself out... But honestly i have no idea why i did it, but proceeded anyways. Eventually found the pic that *haunted* me when i was a kid. It was so sudden and scrolled down quickly as possible, but it was too late. It already carved me deeply. I had to live like hell because of returning of flashback. Never talked to my family, stayed up until 5 am, struggled for 2 months. Yes, i know that i brought this on myself and wasn't careful what i was doing... But it's far too late and i'm so regretful right now...
Ironically, i really like some horror pics and designs. I really do!(Hence i play Doom often) However... Certain things, especially something from my childhood creeps me out and traumatizes me. Although i like such genre, i'm not gutsy enough. It's not a big deal, and others have had worse! That is true... If only i was happy and positive, tho.
Sorry for off-topic rambles. I really appreciate your detailed video. Please keep up the good work!!
This was a very educational video - i'm trying to write a book about someone who has PTSD, and im doing as much research as i can before i get to start writing
Did you finish he book
The way you discribe it, with the smells that trigger, those are the strongest for me. Sounds and sights are strong as well.
My friends with has says" I've had trama and I'm fine". Trama and complex trauma aren't in the same galaxy! Thank you, I have needed you and your channel for a long time!
Usually when I get a “trigger” my flash back loops and even tho it may be for a minute it feels like hours
Im so happy i came across this because i dont know anyone else who suffers from ptsd because of withnessing the loss of a loved one this helps so much to know someone has the same issues as me
I know I'm a bit late but I just found your channel. I just got done watching this video and I just want to say thank you. My friends have been asking me about it because they are actually concerned, (which surprises me), and I showed them your video and a few of them were about to cry, so thank you because you were able to describe something I couldn't so thank you. I have PTSD from 11 years of physical abuse from my step dad. I will have a flashback 5 or 6 times on a good day. I get really tense and my mind gets confused between what's happening around me and the memory that the trigger brought up. It's a terrifying experience for me and I have become violent from it on occasion. I zone out, I'll watch what's happening outside of my body sometimes, and at times I will loose moments throughout my day. I know that you probably won't read this but if it helps someone who goes through a similar thing to know that they are not alone then I think I helped. So thank you.
I just had a multiday panic attack (Didn't know what they were). I have complex PTSD from a lifetime of serious chronic health issue Trama. I started, having trouble breathing, passing out, raised blood pressure, sweats, dizziness, tremors, severe convulsions and really thought I was dying. I started self treating my imagined condition until it got so bad that I went to the ER. It took the ER, my dad, and a friend to convince me it was all in my head. Now, that I reconize this all the attacks of low blood sugar in the past(So I thought) were panic attacks on a smaller scale. Wow, these attacks are really understated.
I stopped at 2:33 because I was crying from the moment you mentioned a clip looping. This is the first time I’ve heard something close to what I experienced a lot all day everyday. Thank you for this video. I needed a good cry.
This is the very first video I have found that actually describes my experiences having flashbacks with CPTSD. Thank you so much for sharing!
yes I have had emotional flashbacks, my brain goes into survival mode, hyper vigilance, extreme agitation, sensory overload, ie down the rabbit hole I go,
I get these constantly. Several per day. Kinda frustrating when I'm sick of thinking of what they're about. Anyway, I've described them as like having a nightmare, but when you're awake. Or kind of like a daydream, like when you were in grade school - you zone out staring out the window at birds or whatever, and then the next thing you know, the teacher calls on you to answer the question, and you don't know what to say because you weren't paying attention. The last couple minutes are just a blur to you, but during that time, you were re-visiting those situations. Only difference is, staring out the window at birds is kind of cathartic. PTSD flashbacks can make you angry, sad, etc.
I have 3 different cases of PTSD. You can laugh at the one last night if you like. I broke my leg 2 years ago and had 3 surgerys to save it , so I bruised it yesterday morning, and after I fell asleep I got up at 3:00 AM yelling I BROKE MY LEG , I CAN'T WALK , HELP ME TO THE CAR !!!! After a shower to clean off the sweat I sat and laughed at my self to chill out. Sad , but I worked that one out to be nothing more than a bad dream. It sucked though and I hope no one goes through it.
ReviewCam : I'm sorry, I should have stated in my first comment that I use comedy / laughter to help me through some of my problems. I can be pretty open about almost anything that's happened to me , and I'm willing to encourage anyone that can benefit from my view of my self that way to laugh with me. I hope you didn't take offense to my first message. I do take it seriously and even have gotten help for the other 2 things. ( Sexualy abuse as a 10 - 14 yearold and getting shot in the back by a poacher ). I won't let it stop me. sometimes it can mess up a day. and at 47 I'm still working on it. Hope this finds you well my friend. Take care.
For me, I have different kinds of flash backs. I think I rarely get the kind of visual flash backs I used to get where its like, I get triggered and then its like a tunnel and it feels like my entire reality is now becoming the place I was in the past where the trauma happened. It sort of feels like on a daily basis I get bits and pieces of shit every day. A lot of the time its just me thinking im a child / acting like a child, acting child-like? Not always seeing images but feeling a lot of horrible feelings / body sensations that are from the trauma, that is huge. I can feel like that pain all day every day. Sometimes I have body memories where I can literally feel the traumatic thing happening again on my body. Visual flashbacks happen in quick succession for me, sometimes ill just keep getting flashes of horrifying things, images of terrible things, one after the other for a while. I see the effects of CPTSD now a lot in my relationships and how it affects my identity and how I view the world and other people. Every day I wake up terrified of being alive.
I relate to your comment the most here. Sorry to hear that you are going through something similar. Hang in there.
Me too! Every day i wake up terrified to be alive. This sucks and is exhausting. You're not alone.
Same here
My flash back is sound a voice,a door opening then I get scared and my heart races real fast. My triggers are a lot. It all depends on the day. What I saw or heard. I got shot 5times in my home. And now I struggle with trying to just be normal if that makes sense. My life is my home now. I get scared if people walk toward me. Night time is hard for me cause I think about my situation more at night. So sleeping is a problem for me cause I'm always watching my door to make sure no one comes in.
B.B Designs/Photography I was pistol whipped/beaten and shot at but he was charged with attempted murder so I now I feel like someone is going to kill me at night especially in the car because I was in the car with the killer
My flashbacks are very similar to yours. Something triggers me and it’s like the outside world doesn’t exist, it’s just me and my brain. I re-experience the same emotions I had during the trauma and it plays over and over again in a loop, just like you said. Usually I end up in fetal position somewhere because I lose control of my body. My hands also tremble a TON. I thought I had Parkinson’s the first time I had a flashback because the hand tremors were so bad. Fortunately, I only have these flashbacks about 1-4 times a month, so I can only imagine what it’s like for you to have to go through so many every day. I sincerely hope you’re able to overcome this and live a life free of this awful stuff. The fact you’re able to talk so openly about it on camera shows that you’ve already come such a long way already and are stronger than you know!
Thank you for sharing this. I live with C-PTSD and for me it depends on the time of the year. I can go months without any issues but suddenly it will hit me like a bus and for many months I hope you are recovering
What I get with my PTSD. Is I'll get the flashbacks of that night I'll feel EVERYTHING that I felt from that night, hear everything from that night, smell everything from that night. I'll space out alot like how you do while also being hyper aware of everything around but not able to do much about it until I come back. Then when I come back I'm super foggy headed for a bit. What triggers me most seems to be talking about it. Even now its triggering me and I've legit sat here for a soild 10 minutes just trying to get out what I wanna say but I feel that its important so I'm trying to push through. Hospitals also trigger me along with ambulances and sirens. I see or hear them and will go into an episode of either seeing that night or hearing sounds from that night. I've also recently started developing night terrors where I'll have nightmares of that night and wake up screaming and crying. It's weirding me out though cause I never had night terrors when he first passed....he passed almost two years ago. I'm thinkin it's probably from other stresses in my life that my brain is just taking and turning into that one specific trauma? I dont know? I'm glad I'm not alone in this though!
Is this what it’s like when veterans have the “thousand yard stare”?
Adam Yes. Absolutely.
Wait I’m crying. Finally. Someone explained exactly how I feel. I’ve been diagnosed for a while but never had I heard someone explain it exactly as I experience a flashback. I don’t feel alone. Thank you
so im late on this video like all the other comments are a year old but someone can finally put it into words. ive been through many different traumas and most people do think flashbacks are like how they're portrayed on TV but most of the time I do get them like you do, very rarely is it kind of a "clip" i don't know how to describe it. and then auditory ones are very strange like ill be sitting in class then ill start hearing really loud yelling (i was around a lot of abuse) and i start looking around because sometimes i can't tell if others are hearing it because at school people do get in fights and sometimes the voices aren't as clear so it is really hard to describe im sorry if this doesn't make any sense but yes, thank you for making this.
Thank you for this video. I know this video is kind of old, but it was helpful for me to hear someone describe a flashback, it makes me feel less dramatic
Well I don't have flashbacks that often but like normally depending on what it is about my body just shuts of and like half of brain is awake replaying the moment and i'm just like when is it over please please and then it's like waking up from a nightmare
Im a nursing student studying mental health and thank you so much for sharing! This is very hard to understand for someone who hasn't been through it. I appriciate you. Thank you so much. You are a strong soul and I wish you so much healing
Thank you for sharing. It's very courageous and very helpful. Thank you for clarifying that flashbacks are in your mind's eye. Until really recently I thought flashbacks had to be literal hallucinations and so I didn't realize they were flashbacks and when my therapist started calling them such, I got kind of confused. Mine aren't repetitive quite like that, but I can relate so much with what you've said.
The flashback space-out, yes, where you keep talking but you wonder just how obvious it is that you mentally were transported to another time. I've never head anyone else understand this before. It's so nice to hear someone else talk about it.
+Jane May I thought the same thing (about hallucinations) for the longest time, too! I think that's just how we see it on TV, which makes sense cause it's so hard to understand in the first place, nevermind visually represent it. I'm glad I'm not alone in having flashbacks, and that you aren't alone in it either ❤️
During my flashbacks I cant talk. So my friends try to talk to me during one and I dont answer for awhile
I've been dealing with PTSD for at least 25 years. It's not fun. You discribed it well. Some days the triggers are less some bring me right back like it just happened. The triggers can be a thought, lyrics in a song, words spoken or read or just pop in my head. They can be sounds, smells, pictures, flashes of memories.
It's the worst. And man, 25 years is a long-ass time ❤️
This made me feel so much better that I’m not alone in this, I just cried & went through an episode before I watched this! You helped me gain strength in realizing I’m not alone. I have ptsd & the flashbacks take me back as if I’m there again, it gets so hard to snap out of it! My mom is trying her hardest to understand still. I’m going to share your video in hopes she can finally understand!
Hi, thank you for making this video. I just almost drown in the river trying to help my nephew drawning. We were safe in the end, and it didn't become a big deal, or I tried to not make it a big deal because I didn't want him to feel it was, maybe for myself too.
But I've having flashback loops just like you explained. I'm trying not to think about it but it just pops out like every minute. I think it's also because it hasn't been much time past yet.
I wanted share this to someone who understand the similar situation and I came across this video.
I wanted a word " I understand."
He seems he is fine now. He kept playing in the river safely after that too.
It only happened to me today, but I can under stand better about how the flashbacks are like. and I can guess how hard and sad and stressful they are for you. Also I'm so proud of you trying to explain them so cheerfully.
Thank you so much！
❤️
When PTSD was at its worst for me I was literally hallucinating things related to the event, colours, the smell of the room, pain in my stomach, voices, etc. it made school very difficult and I underachieved academically
Came across your channel today and I love it!
My boyfriend told me that he has PTSD because of a childhood trauma. I never came across people who had it until i met him 1 1/2 years ago. I wanted to know more about it and read a lot of things and watched a lot of videos but none of the ones I saw explained it as good as you did. He does not talk about it that much... eventhough I know that everybody experiences PTSD differently, it is still good to hear it from the point of view of a person who deals with PTSD. Videos like this not only help people who suffer from it, but also people close to them. Your other video "What not to say to someone with PTSD" also helped me to be more sensitive and to pay more attention.
Thank you so much for helping me understand PTSD more.
Keep on the good work, because your videos are amazing.
I hope that your channel gets bigger and gets more attention, because you deserve it!
From the first 20 seconds you completely explained how I feel. It’s really hard to imagine it day-to-day. I’m sure some are dramatic but it’s difficult to trust movies. I appreciate this video a lot
Flashbacks for me are like the rest of the world kind of goes on mute while it’s happening. Like I jumped into a pool of water and then when it stops, it’s like surfacing from the water. I lose track of conversations if that’s what’s going on or I’ll forget what happened during the part where the flashback is happening. I’ve watched three of your videos so far and I’m so happy that I found your channel. I’ve never heard of someone else who got PTSD from watching a loved one die of a prolonged illness and I’ve had several people tell me that EVEN THOUGH I’ve been medically diagnosed with this, it’s not real because “you can’t just get PTSD from someone dying”. I will be watching the rest of your videos for sure.
If those are flashbacks what do you call it when you feel like you are involved in the situation right then? My most significant flashbacks happen when someone does something similar to something someone has done in the past. While I know I'm in my current situation it FEELS like I am in the past situation that caused trauma and that feeling like... infects the whole situation and I'm treating the other person as if they had harmed me or were going to harm me. And they're left there thinking I'm accusing them of being a monster and I'm acting like a straight psychopath and I actually end up hurting them instead of them hurting me. And I end up being the abusive person. I also ruminate on different things the way you describe that also cause me to dissociate especially when it reminds me of trauma but I don't really consider those flashbacks. My flashbacks are so much more horrible than I can actually express here but it's all just feelings. No visuals or auditory stuff. I was clinically diagnosed several years ago.
That’s a fairly good description of mine today as well ❤️
it makes me mad and sad when i have the flashbacks i’m suffering
I’m sorry you’re suffering, I’ve been in that place as well and it’s unbearably heavy to live with the past piling on top of the present. I hope this day is treating you gently ❤️
I was diagnosed with ptsd a few months ago, and this is very similar to what I experience, thank you for discussing it because it made me feel so validated ❤️❤️
Thank you for the warning, choosing to not watch the rest of the video at this time because I'm actually doing ok today and want to keep that going lol. Your description is spot on! I never even thought that I had PTSD because all I ever knew about it was very dramatic versions of it on TV. When I was diagnosed I was like woah this all makes so much sense
For me my flashes backs are like pieces adding up until the picture is the pain I felt from said sensory functions that I felt after my brother unexpectedly died from his coach ran him to death. It was deemed man slaughter because he knew that when my brother asked to take a break and his body was in clear distress that the coach forced my brother to keep on running, which he ended up running until he couldn't run anymore, not breath, or just move in general because his heart was overexerted. Anyways the flashbacks for me are like pieces because it seems like when I get my flashbacks there are things that really stood out to me either because at the time my mind was just trying to grab onto something that made sense, or something that was so intense in that moment. It was all so fucking intense during and after but the things I remember the most was the panic in my father when he ran us to the hospital. That sense of we don't know why my brother was in the hospital, but it's not a broken bone it's something much worst. My dad is just as confused and as frantic as I am. Then arriving into the E.R. to hear blood curdling crying as my mom is yelling, crying at the top of her lungs in agony and then the horrible realization that this was going to be life changing for the worst. Then to look at the nurses as I was too afraid to cry as the nurses horrified, and hopeless as my mother and yet could never feel the same pain unless they too lost a healthy 12 year old on what was suppose to be a normal day. Then to peer in the room where about five doctors were around this body, I didn't have to see the face I knew it was him. Hearing the defibrillator fire off, but no heart beat, no goodbyes just the screech of a deadline. To then turn away in horror feeling like my entire world was gone in an instant. For my parents to come out of a nearby room crying, then to go into said room myself and start to screech in pain the things I didn't want anyone to see but they heard a 10 year old cry out an equally blood curdling cry of true loss and pain. There's a lot more to the story, things that have gone on for months even years after my brother's death. The men who killed my brother helping the school system to cover up the murder, and doing so successfully. The town either hating us, or being on our side because they knew that we were good people. And the fact I couldn't live a normal life after what happened to my brother which to some people might seem like no big deal, you should have been able to live a normal life after that. Which honestly only happened after I had an opportunity to go to another school an hour away to feel like I could live a somewhat normal life and even then there was a few hitches. It still feels at times I can't ever be normal, either from the fact that my parents don't want to lost their only child and can be over protective at times, or even the fact that certain trigger, or dreams either remind me of the fact my brother is not living life by my side and he's forever stuck in the past never the present, I'll get jealous easily if I see my cousins relying on each other like me and my brother use to; even just the fact that good memories eventually turn sour because of that traumatizing event that ended it all... It's earth shattering in every sense of the word, and when he died a lot of people noticed a part of me died as well. Which when I heard a person actually say that to me it verified I' not the only to have seen the grueling change as well. Hopefully writing out my frustrations to this community will help with some of the dreams I've been having lately that have been confusing and painful to me. Most of said dreams are having a lot to do with my PTSD, and my fear of losing those I currently love which has originated from this traumatic event. I know my comment is a jumbled up mess, but it's hard for me to recount everything that I not only went through by my family so I'm just probably going to end it here.
SealAwayHearts I lost my brother too. God bless you. I read every word and felt the pain and loss you described. My brother’s murderer was not charged. I never got to say goodbye. I felt it all. I don’t like sharing my emotions about it anymore because I feel like everyone is trying to move on healthily and not fall into depression about it so all of my emotions stay stuck inside of me. I find comfort in thinking that he knows I love him and I care. I think about him every single day and I feel guilty any time I’m happy without him but as soon as I get that feeling, I realize I’m thinking of him and I think he knows because the spiritual world is much different. Although morbid, I have found comfort in the thought that we all have to go one day. And the saddest loss is the first loved one to go. They are always the most unexpected and we feel so bad and so guilty that it had to be them. But please take comfort in the idea that his spirit never died. He still exists. His body died. And every good memory you have of him is like him being right there living that moment with you reminiscing. I hope you are better. Take care. ❤️
@@MsChrissyLW "But please take comfort in the idea that his spirit never died. He still exists. His body died." - I think that was just so beautifully stated and wholeheartedly agree. Sending love :)
I’m new to all of this. I had my twin brother pass away. I fell apart. Then my girlfriend of 12 yrs we have 2 girls together started cheating on me. She manipulated me really good telling me everything’s fine. It was 2 months of hell on earth she tortured me and my daughters. She ended up destroying our home and getting arrested for domestic violence. She came home and stopped cheating but now I’m reliving this mess through flashbacks. Everything in this video is true.
It does get repetitive. I will go awhile thinking that I'm handling it well and given myself good healthy outlets and all of a sudden something with happen and im back emotionally and I just want to hide from people and I get very anxious and worried and I start over thinking everything if I'm in front of people and I become really worried that they will notice that inside I'm having a moment where I am just falling apart. Also I get this weird sick feeling that happens to me and for just a few seconds im very nauseous and I need to breath for a moment.
me and my friends have a code word for it, we call it "trauma attack" what it feel like for me is i just freeze and my mind goes blank and all i can see are flashbacks and then i cry hard, its happened a couple times but that really only happens like if someone dose something that triggers me, my main trigger is someone grabbing my throat.
I just found your channel and I am so impressed with it. I wanted to cry happy tears because I know you are making a difference.
My flashbacks are more emotional triggers. Something happens that triggers emotions that bring me back to traumas and it's almost like i'm almost in that moment again.
Mine come in the form of fearful thoughts. Very repetitive. They play over and over in my mind. They give me severe anxiety and panic attacks.
For many years I had emotional flashbacks which felt very intense. I would become hyper vigilant with an intense feeling of fear inside of me. I would feel disconnected but hyper aware and of my surroundings. Anything could trigger it - a loud noise, a crowded space or confined space. I discovered ways to regulate my nervous system through yoga, breathwork, somatic exercises and somatic experiencing. My healing started though when I met someone who helped me co regulate my nervous system. For me, it was my husband. From there I discovered the other modalities for self regulation. I have been totally symptom free for 20 years. I had had symptoms of derealisation and panic/anxiety for 20 years after a traumatic event left me with undiagnosed ptsd. I now realise how important it is to understand the autonomic nervous system and finding ways to regulate. The vagus nerve is key! Polyvagal theory is a must read modality for anyone with ptsd and associated symptoms. Also look into somatic experiencing. The body holds our trauma!X
I think you did a great job of explaining this! And yes! Your flashbacks greatly resemble mine 😊 Thank you for making this video- it really helps people know they are not alone. Blessings and love 💖
There is help.
You've literally described my life to a tee. They're like videos on repeat! It's freaking awful and I feel useless. Always. And the space-i-ness(sp) varies depending on how long it "looped". I get both sight and sounds. I don't feel like I went back through time and I'm watching everything through a 3 person view. Most big life things, like losing a loved one, will stick with me and never go away. I call my loops "Daydreams". They happened often, but I never really went to a therapist or counted how many of them I have at a time, so I couldn't really go into depth about that. (Not that I would, publicly, anyhow.) I just felt like I need to share my experiences with you. ☺️
Your description matches mine, pretty much. I hate that loop. I have gone for years without them and then they reappear. I no longer have nightmares thank goodness. I love your sharing as it helps others understand and for those of us who battle PTSD it helps to know we are not alone.
It really really sucks when I get my flashbacks, I pretty much relive the moments that happened on November 14 2013 when our dairy barn burnt, we had put sawdust into the haybarn (upper level of the barn) since we didn’t have the normal bedding for the animals and we were starting chores at 5:30 at night when I could smell a fire type smell mixed with wood, i let mom and dad know and we looked outside no neighbors had a bonfire and the wind was blowing away from the barn so it wasn’t the wood stove for the house, I then got sent into the haybarn and came down not seeing anything minutes after me coming down dad went up and tried putting a bale of hay out of fire that when he gave it enough oxygen it burst into a fireball and the air all around was hot some parts even burning he yelled get back and i and mom ran to the other end of the barn, she called 911 and I got a 5 gallon bucket of water to try to put some bedding that was on fire out that didn’t even help, then my dad fell down the hay chute on fire and ran past me screaming and I ran with him beating his left arm so the fire would go out and stop burning him, after he got out I tried to save some of the animals and make sure nobody else was inside the barn, my dad was airlifted to UW-Maddison burn unit where we lived in Madison for over a month with dad having sustained 2nd and 3rd degree burns to the face hands and most of his left arm, fire trucks and ambulances with lights and sirens on really hurt me bad with sparking flashbacks, when fire trucks go bye I’m instantly back watching the barn burning and hearing the cows screaming inside the barn, when ambulances go by I see my dad on the table inside with the breathing tube in his mouth with mom and the left side and his work boots in front of the table. Sometimes my fidget spinner helps with my PTSD attacks and one time so far I couldn’t even spin it I just held it tight and had to talk about my attack with a manager during work while it was happening, and it’s rare I can talk to anyone during a flashback. My dad,mom, brother and I are still together and closer than ever since that day, my family was so proud when I was Awarded the Bronze Medal of Valor for saving his life during the fire that he videoed my ceremony, and I uploaded it to RUclips as well as video of the fire I took that night. To explain the medal, I am a first lieutenant in the USAF AUXILIARY. My flashbacks are worse at night from 5:30 and on since the fire started then, my family and friends have been very supportive of me in my times of PTSD attacks, even got a medical alert dog tag to wear when out in public. My military buddies will Also talk to me about what PTSD they have to make me feel better. I watched this video due to having woke up from a flashback nightmare and it really helped me calm down.
I only realized I may have PTSD last year. I was sleeping with my grandmother, she fell off the bed and few days later passed away. Now whenever I sleep next to someone and they move slightly, I could be in a deep sleep, I wake up and reach to "safe" them but they are not falling. My heart would raise and I get overwhelmed with that exact dreadful feeling I felt when my grandmother fell. It's been 6 years, I haven't seeked help yet.
For me, it takes me back to the night I was severely bullied.
my flash backs fully distract me ill get quite and still like im frozen and either hear muffled memories or see something that is similar to what has happend to me ill go back in third person and see one of those memories. heart races and if people move quick behind me things can get bad how i react.
Chris Manning I hear and see them vividly but I’m still sitting in my room.
I hear the same thing over and over.
I didn’t realize that’s what I was doing until I listened to a song with someone yelling the same thing over and over.
I was like “hey that’s what it’s like.”
I appreciate your honesty. Sometimes stuff is too hard to talk about, and it’s good to know that I’m not alone in that
Oh god, thanks for clarifying this. I know this is a late reply but I was googling around because I was worried I was overreacting about my PTSD. And then you explained how yours worked and I went "those are flashbacks? But I have those all the ti-- ohhhhhhhhhh..." I didn't realize I could live a life without those.
thanks so much
I know someone who was in a war in the middle east and sometimes they just go offline for a minute they wont react to anything and stare off to void... it's creepy. When they wake up from that they are really far away feeling
Ah yeah, I believe that's what people refer to as the "thousand yard stare" - when a person does that, they are nowhere near the present moment and it can be uncomfortable not only for us experiencing it, but for those around us. Nobody ever really knows how to react or help haha
Post Traumatic Victory Yeah usually I just let them be. My dad said his grandpa had the same thing. He served in ww2 eastern front
Dissociate
I really love how you’ve done this. It’s very tasteful and I feel honest and genuine and not like idk cliche it’s good. This is nice to listen to. I appreciate you and this.
Really emotional!!!. Very intense. I'm there in the moment again. I struggle to breath normally, and tears just flow. I have triggers. For example. An ambulance parked at the doctors surgery!!!!. If I'm in the car park I have to get out!!!!!!. Even if it meant crashing my car. I have to get away from the scene!!!!!. Nightmares. Reenactments of certain events. All centred around 2 events. December finding out my precious friend. My dad was terminal with cancer!!!!!!. Then in January found out my 28yr relationship with my husband was over, as he left to be with my bf.
Dad passed in the August...omg. how do I begin to process all this??. PTSD and anxiety are the weights I'm left with. It hard!!!!!!. Getting the right help is hard!!!!, but I must remain, and do remain positive. Some days being harder than others. Thank you for reading xxxx😘
I am 75 and suffer from Complex PTSD.
First trauma occurred about 10 yrs. old.
I was asked to make a decision both options being extremely traumatic.
I froze physically for 8 hours. Basically the rest of my life when I had to make a choice tof one of two people, I would instantly go back mentally and physically to the first trauma. The way
It feels like that I accidently stuck my hand in a electric light socket and could not remove it. Fear goes through my whole body. The trauma root is that no one is around to help or cares. It is REAL at the time and takes hours to recover.
Should I be concerned if I've experienced that exact 'image of the memory won't stop looping in my mind's eye' issue multiple times...?
It’s something I would definitely bring up with a doctor/therapist if you’re comfortable, because even if it doesn’t seem “serious” it’s still heckin uncomfortable when your brain is trying to work something out like that 💚
@@PostTraumaticVictory i sure do wish i could afford to do that lmao
I don’t know why, or how, but this is pretty much exactly how my flashbacks feel, though they’re definitely not as frequent as yours. Someone who directly reminds of one event (I knew them at the time) is now at a place that I go to almost daily and every time I see them I get flashbacks, so at the moment they’re happening 5-6 times a day. I hope they do subside eventually, though. More than anything, I hope that dude will just go somewhere else.
Good descriptions. I have severe complex PTSD. Mine can be close to what you describe. Others are way way different. I find certain senses really intense: usually visual, emotional and physical. For example from a few days ago: running down a red carpet spiral staircase with no apparent end. Could feel the carpet. Also wearing white beads broken and tapping on the wall. Could feel the tapping as well as hear it. overwhelming terror of being chased......................whoooooosh I come out of it. There was a lot more but I don't want to trigger anyone. I know the situations meaning but cannot say. Can't remember a darn thing for like an hour after it has completely cleared.
I survived maybe the worst natural disaster of the past 50 years. I lost some of my family and it broke my body. I had terrible ptsd for a few years afterwards. Any trigger would put me into a state of catatonia. Please seek help if you have ptsd. Any major tsunami brings back mine and I immediately call for a therapist.
Sometimes you can talk about it, sometimes it’s triggering
Thank you for telling those who might be triggered by medical stuff. And I’m so glad you did this video because I get these all the time and I thought that panic attacks were way worse than what was happening to me. You explained this so well.
Thanks so much for sharing! I am a nursing student learning about PTSD, and its so great to get some insight into what it is like to have it! Thanks again :)
Your so accurate. I spent 6 years and 6 tours total in the war. And this is one of the most accurate representations I’ve heard of my situations. Thank you.
I'm glad I found this. I'm 100% my son hit PTSD and he was diagnosed as bipolar. He was in prison for 11 years and he has all those symptoms. He throws up also because he smells things. He repeats loudly the same episode (words) over and over during the day.
Gosh, I hope your flashbacks have diminished somewhat. Mine were constant for the first few years, then over an 8yr period, reduced to a few times a day, sometimes not at all, then I had an intense month recently where they were pretty much constant and now I'm back to a few times a day. Mine are how you described yours.
I'm thankful to have really supportive friends who understand what I go through. I'm normally very friendly and extroverted but when I'm having an episode I'll become silent and pull myself out of reality until their like hey dude you okay? Make someones day and try to talk to them
Thankyou for being vulnerable in order to educate us. :) I was curious about how this really presents more in people and trying to better understand what it’s like.
I feel like it's probably kinda like a dream where you just are in the situation and you're not really aware you're at home or wherever
Girl you are on point! At least for me you are. You described it all PERFECTLY. I range from "good days" where I can have none to "horrible days" where I know I should just hide in bed under the covers(but can't with 4 kids) because EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHING triggers me.
Yes I hear sounds too. Like for example I use to be in programs. Kids use to be restrained including myself and sometimes when a child is screaming I panic, get jumpy or get anxiety as if a peer was being restrained or I was.
I didn't realize that what I experience are flashbacks, but it's pretty much exactly what you described. For me they're mainly emotional flashbacks where I'll get a wave of the worst grief or most gut-wrenching anxiety, but I'll also experience a prominent visual component as well. However, I've never been formally diagnosed with PTSD or C-PTSD.
Has anyone had triggers from remembering a pet they lost? My boyfriend had a dog when he was a kid, and since his family was abusive I think this dog was the only one he was close to, so he’ll start crying hysterically and saying his dogs name sometimes...
My flashbacks are visual. They come out of nowhere and I'm either in the perspective of my mum who died and what she may have been feeling or it's my fear of what happened. It plays in a loop. It's like my mind is a data base and its trying to find a solution to the trauma but its stuck . I just cry and cry and feel like there is no barrier between me and my mum. I'm feeling what she would have been feeling and it overwhelms me so much I can go into deep crisis
I totally understand what you mean about the muted world And the sound in your ear . And everything is going in slow motion like a silent film
Thank you for being the voice that I haven’t been able to be. I have to admit, I laugh and smile a lot; watching your videos. Simply because I can finally relate to someone 💙 thank you again for being that bright light at the end of the tunnel.
When I have like a sound flash back i always think of it like a CD that got scratched and it's just skipping on the same part over and over again.
I have PTSD from a robbery... ever since losing my mom and kid? my PTSD? has been worse.. everyday my body wakes up immediately triggered by the reality.. my body is so strained without knowing I started doing " Exposure Therapy". Whenever I felt danger was lurking outside? I would go stand where I felt the threat was.. this calms my body and helps it recognize what I am seeing is real, what I am thinking? Is not as bad as it appears. I hope everyone who struggles like I do? You find love and light, and healing!! idk if we ever will have a normal life again, but we can adjust
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thank you I'm sorry I couldn't get through this video, your description of a flashback really let me see what was happening to me because I can barely function when it happens.
I could see that this would help explain what flashbacks from PTSD feel like. As someone with PTSD, I have lots of them... But there are times where I actually have a PTSD episode, and the images come in even quicker. It becomes so disorienting and terrible to the point I can only lay on the floor and cry hysterically. I feel like those small and fragile moments are even harder to explain.
I have social anxiety disorder, but i get this too. I have just a few experiences that come in visual loops, but i really struggle with the emotional state and being snappy with those around if something causes me to regress for some reason. I've just recently started to figure out that my random, excessive anger actually just happens when I am in fear, althoughthe situation may not call for it, but reminds me of a situation that did. It is hard to stay grounded, but catching it when you're not is a significant first step. I'm just gonna be watching your vids the rest of the day at work lol