More of a Divorce Attorney's Thoughts on Love and Marriage-James Sexton
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- Опубликовано: 21 сен 2024
- A second Soft White Underbelly interview and portrait of James Sexton, a divorce attorney in NYC. Here’s a link to Jame’s first video:
• A Divorce Attorney's T...
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James's books, How To Stay In Love:Practical Advice From An Unexpected Source and If You’re In My Office It’s Already Too Late:A Divorce Lawyer’s Guide To Staying Together are available on Amazon.
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"I've had cases where this person is just fluidly psychotic like straight up should be in this chair being interviewed by you"
Had me dying
I read your comment exactly same time he was saying it. Like 1 second ahead 😂🎉❤
That opening monologue was like Quentin Tarantino talking about his new movie 😂
Spot on!!!
❤
💯😂
Tarantino and Saul Goodman vibes
Never married and made it to the age where I'm watching all my friends be extremely miserable in their next round of divorces and then they immediately sign up for wife number three!? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills
How old are you? I hit 40, and I'm seeing the first waves of divorces.
Same. Nothing can compare to having peace, complete freedom throughout the day and way more money saved.
Men are taught to hate relationships. So when they feel unhappy in one they think it's normal. It's not. You're supposed to enjoy your partners company most of the time, with brief periods of unhappiness.
When I was 45 (about 20 years ago), I noticed that men got way too comfortable being married. It’s just not in their comfort zone to be without. The women I’ve known, have all said that once was more than enough.
I’ve only met a couple of men I would want to commit to. Unfortunately, it took me too long to realize that.
I'm 43 and all my male friends 40 to 50 have all gotten divorced except 1 guy. All of the wife's starting watching TikTok looking at Tarot Cards, Astrology, going to therapy and then all of a sudden the missed out of life and boom 💥 I'm not happy and want a divorce.
I'm in the same boat as well married 17 yrs and together 21 with 3 sons. I'm over it all and just applied for my passport, opened a new bank account, opened a post office box.
Did couples counseling and I was blamed for things 20 yrs ago. Therapist told.my wife sounds like you feel lost and unfulfilled and that she took no accountability for her own failed mistakes, wife get pissed off and doesn't want to return back, which tell me that the therapist she has been seeing for the last 3 yrs doesn't hold her accountable nor acknowledge her bad chlices she has made in our marrage, so it's a waste of money in the long run.
25 years and the chill down my spine and magic is still there for my wife and I, overjoyed to be the outlier
@@ryancohen5580 I love ❤️ this. It DOES exist!!!!
Same, same, brother. We're the lucky few. Cheers to the wonderful women that make our day, one day at a time, until death do us part.
@@thetechguychannel I love this so much! Lucky woman.
I feel the same way. I'm not constantly aware of it but he really is the only man I've ever been interested in dating and he is absolutely my person. I'm so grateful I found him and that my life turned out the way it has.
@@thetechguychannel I am convinced my wife and I have been in love throughout all our lifetimes, if past lives exist, she’s been my lady and I have been her man always and forever.
It's easy to be married when you aren't selfish. It's not an easy process but if you plan on having children, they'll do better in life with parents that didn't run away due to the slightest discomfort.
Being married and being parents are two different things.
Everyone is selfish in a way. The question is how to control it. We're struggling with it...
@@waterbug1135how?
@@jaughnekow Put chips and computers in our heads lol. But seriously, there's no ethical fix. Our biological system is the root of all this bs. Just find the people that will keep the same ethics and morals as you, like nature intended.
@@jaughnekow
selfish in the moment or selfish in the long run?
Selfish people, meaning people who put their interest high, will take care of the relationship because they will understand the impact on them if it fails.
There is “present you” now and there is “future you”. The people that our society calls selfish usury care only about the present and not about the future.
Fellow divorce attorney here (Pennsylvania and New Jersey). I am so happy divorce attorney James Sexton has a platform to tell the general public what we see all the time. Get educated about divorce if you are even thinking about getting married. Or simply stay single. You can still have amazing relationships without bringing state law into your life and finances.
@@jcnlaw I simply don't understand the laws in your country.
But then again I don't understand who marries without a prenup.
So maybe I'm the problem and not your country!
I am also in your area, in NJ burns of Philly. I’ve been trying to partner with a divorce lawyer who understands narcissism I can refer people to.
@@leneo1731you are not the problem. The laws in the United States vary widely from state to state. Overall, marriage is a bad idea in the United States (and Canada) for most ambitious people.
A hospice volunteer!?! LOVE THIS GUY. I work as a private in-home Palliative/Hospice/End-Of-Life caregiver and agree 💯 with James's viewpoint of living life w a " No B S" attitude...say the thing, say what's real, say it all w empathy and love and truth. And fully comprehend that this life thing is finite and that's OK - dying and death are part of a life, but in the interim there's so much to experience AND we can choose to talk about it all w/o the rose colored glasses on. Thank you, James and Mark! Please continue!
@@cherielafleur3137 Aptly said. And he is a dog lover, too ✌🏼💛
@@saudigold50 LOVE IT!
Thank you for giving me a gift for my son of incalculable value
This interview encompasses just about every category of what it is to be human and it serves as a guide to be successful at it
Mr Sexton you are in fact a national treasure
I say this as a man in the city of New York who is going through an EXTREME case of a traumatic divorce and my son and step daughter were SEVERELY traumatized
Beautifully put. Thank you.
@@InkaPley thank you for saying so
James is a radical realist. A persistent pragmatist. Life is easier when you can face ugly truths. His energy is the face of absurdity always impresses.
He’s in a maze. He truly knows quite a bit
This guy is brilliant he is 100% honest I love it please have him on again
He's been on few times if you haven't seen already...watch those ..plus hes been on soooo many other channels
Mr. Sexton! as a 23-year-old who's not married or anything, the fact that I could listen to you for two hours speaks volumes about how much I admire your brilliance. Your interviews have been incredibly informative, and it's clear you're truly passionate about what you do . Awesome interview !
You're an old soul Yana ❤
Man the line, “if I had known it was the last time my kids would call me daddy, I would have taken a moment to cry. I’m just dad now” hits me hard.
Okay this guy has literally too many amazing quotes!!! Yeah he's definitely a national treasure with all his stories and thoughts about the world and human beings in themselves 🙏🏻
I like this guy. Even though he's a divorce lawyer, he talks like us military Vets who have been war. Everyone is full of shit, nothing makes sense, laws can be unfair and go against you, and people have no loyalty. No BS common sense, straight to the point, I love it.
I am a legal professional and I’ve never thought about it Ike that before. Now that you mention this, this is really true and eye opening.
“I really still dont know why this is interesting” it’s because you are articulating, out loud, very publicly, the unpopular truths that a very silent majority of us are too afraid to speak out loud because it will make a room silent and awkward, and hurt our woefully married friends’ feelings.
Just because you are in the silent majority doesn’t mean it is awkward for others to hear this.
I’m happily married long term. Been with the same person for 30 years.
I’m sure what he says is true for a good number of people.
Doesn’t make it any less or more true for me. 🤷♀️
I think it’s so funny when. He says “forego f-ing everybody else…”
As of the majority of people cold attract an unlimited amount of sexual partners. As if you don’t, typically, have to “work” for those encounters as well. Even if you buy love, you still have to work for it.
But wtf do I know…I’m a BJJ brown belt and we are all absolutely insane.
Especially the females 😆
He was 100% on point.
Mark is cool. I have to admit. He’s the ghetto people’s Johnny Carson. This was a fun interview!
😂
Carson had zero educational value though lol
@@longdong3889 What up Dong. Yeah. Johnny was all G.A.M.E.
I could listen to this guy all day. Thanks for posting.
Maybe this guy is a little bit crazy- but he's also brilliant, insightful, funny and incredibly sexy. He doesn't fit the attorney stereotype, he's more of a romantic than he realizes and when he choked up telling of his child he clinched his humanity. This was one of my favorite interviews.
Thanks for having him on again, I could listen to him all day.
Familiarity breeds contempt. A phrase I heard like 25 years ago. But rings true in most relationships
It is a bizarre dynamic. We get into relationships wanting to be close to a person, but if that happens it hurts the relationship. But it depends on expectations and how you define "relationship". My parents screamed at each other, treated each other with contempt. Married 73 years when mom passed at 91. I kind of thought dad would be happier, but he's been very broken up. I don't understand it. I have to assume familiarity trumped their contempt for each other. Bizarre.
@@waterbug1135 when you’ve been with someone so long you can fear the unknown. A relationship can be glory or hell. Either way when it’s all you’ve known for so long it’s your normal. People stay because of comfort. Comfort in the contempt?????
James Sexton is the guy who got me to sub to SWU. Channel has come a long way Mark.
There we go, I was waiting for this one. Thank you Mark ❤
However I didn't expect it to start that way 😂
😂😂 for sure
I love the ending with the shirts, Mark thanks for finding everyone and letting them be heard! They look like a weight has been lifted off their shoulders 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🙏🏻
Okay. I like his honesty, He is too energetic for me tho😂😂
Am exhausted listening to him😂
I thought it was just me!
@@samantha551 🤣🤣🤣
He’s on a good one ❄️
@@tiffanymo3683I take addy (prescribed) and I felt the geek immediately
I watched to the very end and this man has made me want to totally change myself in many ways, I will be doing a lot of inner investigation and going to the people that have been in my life the longest with some questions. Thank you so much Mark for interviewing this man because he is really one of a kind, he's definitely missing his true calling in life and should be a life coach but with all the experience from everything he's earned I think when he retires he could be one to just have something to do and keep making a difference in the world 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🙏🏻
Got married at 23 my wife was 21, 45 years later I tell my wife how beautiful she is at least once a day, probably more so now than we were younger. The vast majority of my siblings, nieces and nephews and cousins are long term marriages. I don’t know about the rest of them my wife and ever went to or need a marriage counselor. Is it easy all the time no but I couldn’t think of a better person to spend my life with.
You forgot to tell people she wears the pants in the family
@@jeff1130ok Jeff confession by projection, so does she walk you on a leash, oh sorry I assumed it was a she, it’s a safe place Jeff you can tell us.
@@lvr8429another person with confession by projection I’m sorry the other guy had a better dick and know s how to use it. Btw we are together 99.9% or the time.
@@56SpookdogDon’t be upset that strangers troll your successful relationship. It’s jealousy. Pure and simple. I’ve been happily married since 18 and 13 years later we are still thriving. We needed marriage counseling once after I got PTSD from a deployment but thankfully we became so much stronger from it. People either grow together or grow apart. Growing apart has more often then not because people don’t take accountability of their own issues and hope the other partner will fix them. Glad you both are happy and well. Cheers to another 45 years and I hope to experience the same with my spouse! 🎉
@@lvr8429
Seeing him going to tears thinking about taking care of and loving his child is the first and only thing he is saying that he believes and he knows is true! Yeah all this bad shit happens but when you are truly in love all of the monetary and status goes straight out the window!!!
“We’re feeding the negativity. Negativity is very valuable right now. Like, people tune in to watch shit get fucked up. People pay and want to see fails” The irony lol
I adore James. Always great when you have him on
Ditto❤
This guy should take his experience and stories as a lawyer in NYC and hit the stand up comedian circuit. He’s got the charisma and talent
Comedy doesn’t pay as well as hedge fund guys tho 😢
He should do a Ted talk.
@@Collageartist69 Great idea. His knowledge & experience from the ‘not so’ glamorous & giddy BS unions would certainly make an attentive audience think more about marriage & the serious contract it is
"
in Brazilian jiu-jitsu like if somebody pretends they’re good at it, they’re going to get found out real fast like, you can’t fake your way through it, you can’t buy your way into it, you can’t get a fake version of it like you could have a fake Rolex, or a fake Birkin bag like …" Sort of what we’re seeing on the national political stage right now.
We need to protect this man at all cost! Thank mark
@@Hakimnageye ✌🏼
I love this guy. This is absolutely an attorney you want on your side.
He’s too expensive for me. But I love his interviews
@@Abby-ll5yw - Few can afford him ✌🏼
I wonder what his fees are 🤑
he has dropped serious gems in this interview and made me really think about a lot. has great points and topics that made me dig deeper than the surface. WOW. 💙💙💙
The fact that people still get married is mind boggling to me.🤦♂️
For many of us with shit passports, marrying our significant others is the only solution
My buddy keeps badgering me on when im going to get married. He married early and cheats on his wife lol. I quoted this guy from his first appearance: “if every time you walked outside there was a 56% chance of a bowling ball falling on your head, you probably wouldnt go outside anymore. Thats the divorce rate…56%”
@@ifyoureadthisyoudiwhat? What is a shit passport?
For the children.
@@JFEnterprize I live in the EU with a Serbian passport, whereas my long-term girlfriend is an EU citizen.
I need a visa just to go to the UK, Ireland or USA as a tourist. She doesn't.
For living in Europe, I need to renew my residence permit annually, paying for the privilege every time, she needs nothing.
We can agree the passport is shit.
This guy’s personality and mannerisms are so Ken Rosenberg of GTA Vice City. 😂
😂😂😂💯
He’s from NY yea. The people he deals with between multi millionaires and mob men.
“I stick my head outta the gutter for one freaking second and date shovels SHIT IN MY FACE!”
Hey yah all from NZ
I love this guy sooo much. Listened to his book 3x - classic. All I can say is that fortunately, I will never need his services ;). Hearing about it is priceless though
This guy knows more about human nature and psychology than most trained psychologists do.
Good morning people. You are loved
James I love you, and I love how your voice goes up 10 octaves when you’re excited! But I wonder if that would become “the snort when she laughs” after a few years 😂
My ex wife would say yes. For sure.
He found what he is naturally good at. Sad when society doesn't recognize passion anymore.
@@longdong3889 ✌🏼
Besides the last interview this is literally the 2nd most profound interview I’ve ever heard.
Magic, a world treasure! He verbalizes our troubles the most succintly, down to earth way, that is his genius, i guess
"Do what you love." The words of privileged folk. I guess they think people love those chitty jobs that somebody's gotta do.
I’ve known that this guy has been on SWU but never dared to watch until now and it doesn’t disappoint.
My clear take-aways based upon experience :
1) Prenups don’t work
2) ***Never get involved with a woman who was born in the same town that y’all live in ***
3) Love actually does work when realities are communicated and that both man and woman are willing to work hard at it!!!!!!!!!!
Sexton is on fire and on point. He would know from a legal perspective how Love and Marriage works. I personally think getting married before 24 is a couple not liking their personal circumstances at that time. I would only marry after a 4 yr courtship and she never was married or had kids/drug free and low romantic partners. Depending on age. My age range is mid 30’s to 50’s for being involved with a woman.
Guess great minds think alike….married first time & only time @29. Waited 5 yrs to be sure of compatibility. Still in the game 28yrs later. Communication & commitment key players
I got married to my wife last year. Been living with each other for 8 years . Big advice to people who plan on getting married. Live with that person. when you do you tend to know that person on a deeper level, whether they’re clean freaks or messy. And just like school, marriage isn’t for everyone. Only get married if you believe in true love and she’s your soulmate, other than that it is just a title or piece of paper. I’ve witnessed my own parents get divorced and yeah I was 15 years old when it happened.
Sound advice. Followed this game plan. Married 28yrs still in the game…….
My parents have been married for 65 years. Its amazing!!!!
James really can warn us about the future pitfalls of romance. Unlike most ‘experts’ we’ve listened to on SWU, he also wants us to avoid them and have a glorious future 😅 very entertaining, thanks Mark 😊
Married my husband 25 years ago been together for 30 years and I am 52 years also ❤
It seems like we as people are self-destructive. Real love and loyalty are like a disease to most people.
@@JJPHILLYLG - Everything boils down to survival of the fittest ✌🏼
People will say he’s crazy just because he’s viewing an emotional topic from a logical standpoint
You and Jim hit this one out the park again. Great interview and insight into what relationships should really be like. Keep on being great Mark. ❤❤❤
Have'nt seen the whole video, but I'm pretty sure he could go on for much longer.
He’s so extra I love it 😂
@@victorias5386 he'll be back, trust.
@@katismysecondname5152loves the sound of his voice.
And Back to me…
😂😂😂😂😅😅😅
Absolutely love Jim, could listen to him forever.
I just love this guy! So authentic. Would love to have dinner with him and actually have an interesting genuine conversation with another authentic human being. So rare today 😎
Entertaining...He peels back the fake layers of marriage and relationships 💪🏾
I rewinded this post more than 15 times at different segments. His quotes are superb, needs to just make a book of quotes.
Long time subscriber here!
Enjoy! Mr Mark!
❤😊
I have to disagree with him. While i do often feed my dog bacon 🥓 she loves me for me and the bacon is just one small part of the package.
😂😂😂😂😂
As soon as you die your dog will eat you 😂
My favorite divorce lawyer
Okay, 60 year old woman still happily married, but he speaks the absolute truth. Im not one to cry easily, but the beautiful people at the end was it for me. Thankyou 💙 🌎
Been married 32 years and the secret to staying happily married is God and communication and compromise. Divorce isn’t the answer. Where ever you go there you are. Rarely is it only your parents issues.
Agree except religion. No religion in my home, but a successful marriage of 28yrs. Communication, compromise, commitment.
This Is Probably The Greatest Interview In The History Of The Internet. I Mean That With All Honesty. Everything He’s Talking About Is Everything That I Speak About (I Cuss The Same Way) On Relationships, Marriage, And Divorce. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 Interview
Y’all have to get James’ book!!! Brilliant.
But the audiobook narrated by him is even better!
I watch @ 20” burst- with 5-10” reflection time - this experience of two men unfolding for us is a gift.
I think maybe this guy see so many trauma from divorce, he is also getting traumatic himself.
I ABSOLUTLY LOVE listening to him. Right on!!
This dude is awesome ! He gives the most realistic perception on ppls expectations. Straight up !
Gosh I can’t get enough of this man 😁😆
Very wise man. Love every interview with him
I like what he said about marriage being a long term investment. It’s hard but well worth it compared to the emptiness and self serving nature of the alternative.. for me at least
I agree and I’ve been married since I was 17 35 years now..nothings perfect and if anyone said they don’t argue is full of it and it ain’t normal 😂❤
Yet it is still an investment that needs two people to continually invest in it. Something most people are not willing to do long term in the current culture.
Lord have mercy on us. We’ve come to this. 😢
He is truly a national treasure !
*Eyeroll*
$100k to maintain a Koi pond is not possible. You can give someone $100k and say it's for Koi pond maintenance, but that amount couldn't be spent for actual maintenance. I don't know who is making stuff up or this was some income tax and/or money laundering scheme.
Often when people say unbelievable things it should be considered unbelievable.
I watch James Sexton interviews as if was a comedy set he is deliriously funny!
The guys not wrong....certainly an interesting perspective
This guy is crazier than 99% of people you interviewed
In a good meaning I hope?
He’s not bird nest in the hair type. He’s type a1 personality nuts. 😮
Bro watched a 2 hour video in an hour
@@GamingAndChill 😂
He is definitely a talker and NOT a listener! You can tell he hates listening. Can't say I've ever seen an attorney with arm tattoos (probably has a personality disorder).
Yay! Another one ❤️
As always, Thank you Mark!
I'm gay and I've been with a few extremely beautiful women. Let me tell you, beauty means nothing in the long run. Sure its nice that a beautiful woman picked you but that shit goes down the drain very quickly as the relationship goes on. Yes, I feel that there has to be a certain amount of physical attraction to each other initially. But once you get to know each other it don't mean shit. Truly.
@@AdamGoldswainheard of her
Never heard of her
@@AdamGoldswainI'll definitely look her up
@@AdamGoldswaini was able to see pictures of girl on girl action but they were only pictures. No video. Some accounts are private. Whenever I see girl on girl porn it is usually disappointing because it's obvious that the women aren't really into it. Watching 2 women getting it on who truly love what they're doing is a sight to behold.
@@AdamGoldswainNo, these days my life is consumed with the political discourse in this country and this election could be the culmination of the best or worse determination of all of our lives.. I'll check out the hub.
Love this guy. Everything that comes out of his mouth is accurate. 🙌🏼
never clicked on a video so fast
Woke up saw this guy again so figured worth a go. Never watched his first. But like most of marks stuff a1
I know that this man is spot on......thank you for this.
Man, this is a great talk. Thanks for arranging another interview Mark, I loved this one!
I’m so glad its love me and my man have together and not just sex.. hell of a difference 😁
Let me know if you ask for his phone if he freely gives it to you 👀
@@JFEnterprizemine would freely give me his phone damn right after 35 years of marriage ❤
@@JFEnterprize👍🏽 💯Most couples won’t survive the phone inspection 🧐 😆
i dated a chick that threw up in my mouth because she drank too much and i didn’t give af. i still think about that chick to this day, she was truly someone special
This absolutely fascinating. My dad was a criminal lawyer who defended the entire spectrum. Then my parents went through a horrendous divorce. The funny or sad part was he was wise to her cheating and had a gum shoe following her to get evidence of infidelity that he used in court, and she had evidence of his psychological abuse. She wound up leaving and I stayed with him. He worshiped the ground she walked on but she had nothing but disdain and disgust for me, which for a kid who loved a good dad was hard to deal with.,
He's back!!!
I LOVE THIS GUY! He just sees it how it is.
I would love to see a judge watch this man defend his client
Love the honest truth that women have so little to offer yet expect the moon ❤
No, women expect the moon is reaching to them....😎😘
this man is the better person at speaking, you cannot convince me of otherwise
I so love this guy !!! I can’t believe that more people don’t think this way everyone should know if it is on paper in a text kiss your ass goodbye. I always said never document anything you want or don’t want people to see or know. I love everything he has to say if politicians were as honest as he is I would vote for his ass in a minute. Even if he didn’t know nothing about politics.
Cocaine is a hell of a drug
Lame.
You’re confusing inner happiness and healthy energy with a BS platitude.
Cant attack his argument so you attack his character.
@@saudigold50 Inner happiness? His guy’s mind is racing.
Lawyer man is based
I think he's 100% sober and has raging ADHD.
This man instead of being a divorce lawyer he should be a comic 😅
All good comedy is usually just the funny interpretations of life experiences ect. Taking a positive look at it rather than the doom and gloom route. Like Ron whites tater salad skit. Was real. He said he make a million dollars over the 5mph rickity bridge one for doing 10pm over it cause his foot must of slipped off the brake. 🥳😂🤣
❤Great interview guys!
I just love James!! ❤️ These interviews with him are so informative and interesting..he’s definitely the most dynamic person Mark interviews!! Thank you, Mark, for giving us more James! Love you both! ❤️❤️
This is beautiful work!
You can't have James Sexton and not expect to hear "whoever discovered water isn't fish" 😅