It’s even more difficult to understand my husband had an affair because he had the opportunity to do it, not because he didn’t love me anymore, or we were having issues, only because his friend was doing it so he did, 💔
Mine was also surrounded by a group of male coworkers who were 10+ years younger than him, players, married messing around, single dating multiple women.... when a flirty chick joined the company and started flirting with all of them, he wanted to stand out, to be the special one. not because he didn't love me nor was he having issues in the marriage, nothing. Just a follower, "Why not me? Harmless"
Shame can sometimes be extremely heavy for the betrayed to carry. In my case, it was difficult when my first husband betrayed me and we divorced shortly thereafter (well he left me for her when I was 6 mos pregnant). Years later, in my 7th year of my 2nd marriage, 2nd husband confessed his unfaithfulness. The shame was unbearable. The hurt, the feeling of being so hideously ugly, unlovable. What was it about me that cause not one but 2 different husbands to cheat. I was ashamed to show my face in public; ashamed to be around family or friends even my very good friends who've been with me through those ugly first marriage times. While therapists would tell me it was all on the men or a sad commentary about these times, I lived it in total shame wanting a bag over my head and wishing I could just play ostrich and dig my head in the sand. I had 4 children. I had a demanding job. I had responsibilities. I chose to accept my 2nd husband's apologies but believe me nearly 30 years later and I still struggle. My marriage is in tact but I still feel I walk the road of shame because I stayed in this marriage. Family still treats me askance as if I'm a pushover and a doormat.
Wait you just said two mins before that you did think about and even cried about what it would do to your husband then finished with you didn't even think about your husband with one is it
My question about her crying of her being so unfair and hurting her spouse is, Why didn't she confess rather than waiting to be caught. Another thing is at the AR website most authors answer questions or comments, she has to date never responded.
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It’s even more difficult to understand my husband had an affair because he had the opportunity to do it, not because he didn’t love me anymore, or we were having issues, only because his friend was doing it so he did, 💔
Mine was also surrounded by a group of male coworkers who were 10+ years younger than him, players, married messing around, single dating multiple women.... when a flirty chick joined the company and started flirting with all of them, he wanted to stand out, to be the special one. not because he didn't love me nor was he having issues in the marriage, nothing. Just a follower, "Why not me? Harmless"
Shame can sometimes be extremely heavy for the betrayed to carry. In my case, it was difficult when my first husband betrayed me and we divorced shortly thereafter (well he left me for her when I was 6 mos pregnant). Years later, in my 7th year of my 2nd marriage, 2nd husband confessed his unfaithfulness. The shame was unbearable. The hurt, the feeling of being so hideously ugly, unlovable. What was it about me that cause not one but 2 different husbands to cheat. I was ashamed to show my face in public; ashamed to be around family or friends even my very good friends who've been with me through those ugly first marriage times. While therapists would tell me it was all on the men or a sad commentary about these times, I lived it in total shame wanting a bag over my head and wishing I could just play ostrich and dig my head in the sand. I had 4 children. I had a demanding job. I had responsibilities. I chose to accept my 2nd husband's apologies but believe me nearly 30 years later and I still struggle. My marriage is in tact but I still feel I walk the road of shame because I stayed in this marriage. Family still treats me askance as if I'm a pushover and a doormat.
thanks appreciate your sharing, brings some peace and understanding in my struggles
Wait you just said two mins before that you did think about and even cried about what it would do to your husband then finished with you didn't even think about your husband with one is it
My question about her crying of her being so unfair and hurting her spouse is, Why didn't she confess rather than waiting to be caught. Another thing is at the AR website most authors answer questions or comments, she has to date never responded.