Im with you. My mother gets very upset when i tell her. If i dont marry at the age of 34... she will never talk to me . Im now 29 .... do u have advice to me?
@@Ava-bp1ze relationships 101. you can't control another persons behaviour, only your own. call her bluff and if she keeps talking to you but talking shit be straight up. tell her that you will see her and talk with her less and less depending on how much she comes at you. you permit what you tolerate.
My #1 reason: child support payments. The moment you create a kid you become a slave who doesn't even have a right to keep enough of your hard earned money to sustain your dignity. No, thanks.
I don't have kids and I'm 47 and I feel happy everyday. I don't want kids. if I have kids there goes all my money and stress on them. right now I'm happy because I'm free from all that . I've gotten so used to spending my own money how I want to spend it and focus on myself.It feels great
@@silasbishop3055 Less human beings leaving a carbon footprint, less damage to the earth. Less people milking off the system. These are very real scenarios that also impact money and taxes.
@@vladram9084 On the contrary, declining birth rates in the West is a massive crisis. If a nation is not capable of self-preservation, it will cease to exist. Do you not have an obligation towards your ancestors, and towards your race to carry the torch of self-propagation which has been carried for hundreds of thousands of years? Do you really not see any moral issue with being a genetic dead end, and valuing your own pleasure and comfort over the lives of your unborn offspring?
You had older parents who didn't give you a childhood. I'm oldest of 5 kids and looked after my younger siblings while my parents who were young when I was born were being kids at the expense of my teen years. By the time I had finished school I had wiped all the snotty noses and dirty behinds I ever thought I'd ever have to. So, having a vasectomy at 22 wasn't that much of a decision for me and have never regretted it. Have told very few people I've done it and feel under no obligation to explain myself to anyone. If they want me to have kids, they can pay for them and raise them. Until then, it's none of there business and I don't answer to them. Yes, I'm going to live my life. Am I making up for lost teen years? You can't make up for lost time. You can make the most of the time ahead and that's what I'm doing. I had my taste of parenthood. Am now moving on. All my baggage has wheels and you can't see me for dust!!
I had a childhood just like yours! I had to take care of my younger siblings and did not get to be a teenager just the maid and nanny! I never had any children of my own for that reason.
I can so relate to this! My mom was 37 and my dad was 46...we have almost nothing in common. I'm 26 and I don't want kids either, only want to focus on my career goals. Nice vid 👍
I'm really happy to see more men talking about this. Obviously this issue HUGELY affects women, but there doesn't seem to be many guys who talk about this, so thank you!
it affects a man HUGHLY if he's in love with a woman , she wants them, he never even considered it because he saw no value in it, just like he never considered vacationing in Mongolia , not sure this qualifies as "talking" about it, but I'll let music and photographs do my talking> ruclips.net/video/jqkmFszKWCo/видео.html
I'm just like you - no exposure to kids when I was growing up and don't know how to talk to kids. Also, I think extroverts are much better with kids. As an introvert, I find them intrusive and exhausting.
Can totally relate. Dont want kids either and hate people saying I will change my mind. They are some Facebook pages that have people in the same boat. Also, can say they your childhood was different, but closely relatable to as well. Barley had childhood or teenage years. Was pushed to be a adult at young age. Not offended here and ignore those saying you'll want kids later. There are people in the same boat as you.
I think being with the person they want to be with is more important. Like some people wouldn't leave there partner just because there partner can't have kids or doesn't want them. Even if they wanted kids
95% is really sad if that's true. I honestly believe in this day and age, people who choose to have children in this world of excess human have more explaining to do than those who don't. It's time we stopped being anxious about this subject, and stopped feeling the need to explain our completely rational choice. Those who want or have children never get asked why they're choosing that path in the face of so many difficulties in the world right now. It's time for a paradigm shift.
For men..you are tied as a Jr partner to the will a woman, who can abort a mans offspring at will.. or decide he is good enough and have a baby and soon a pension ...one way or another. I think it's great men have learned. I understand why women don't want children either...
I'm single man in my 40's and I don't want any of my own kids ever.I'm a mentally challenged man with special needs and mental heal problems.I have a.d.d.depression,anxiety disorder.i live on both low income and disability money.i had a very bad childhood.
that's good.I'm a gay single man without kids.I have had some single fathers asked me out on dates in the past and I tell them no way.They think I'm being selfish just because I don't want my own kids ever.Most of my relatives and old high school friend that's my current landlord that are parents accept that about me unlike some strangers that think they are better than me and try to tell me that Jesus is a married man with kids.I know that's not true even thou I'm an old fashioned man or religious man.
I have TOTAL sympathy for BOTH your (Mark Goudy, Larry Kuehn) situations. I had the BEST possible NEARLY PERFECT secular non-religious intelligent parents one could have and the BEST most comfortable childhood a child could have. Yet, I STILL feel the same way you do. I have ADDITIONAL reasons for opposing breeding, of course, but both of YOUR reasons are MORE than sufficient! Best of luck for both of you!!
my advice is to stay off social media because all you will see is friends and family posting pics of their kids because thats all they got they are a shell of who they once were, after a while someone or something will try to guilt trip you into having a child because everyone else has them but stay strong and dont give in i personally disconnected from social media and this helped me to really be secure in my decision, influence and guilt can play a big role in a persons decision in life.
Same don’t want kids to I hate when people annoy me for on reason it’s no ones business if I don’t want kids and that makes me happy then yeah rather have a pet
I think I found my type same I don’t want kids because you give birth to it makes me sick and crying changing nappies taking them to school looking after them and everything I’m not doing that sorry I want to live my life travel work have lots of money and a nice car that’s all love is more important to me
I'm 23 and loathe the thought of having kids...... reason? Because i don't want something that's more expensive than a horse and drains money like water through a sieve, i have lot's of fragile things that i do not want to put away, i like having my swords on display, like spending my money on myself and always want dogs and cats...... kids don't mix with anything i like..., call me selfish if you like but i *NEVER EVER!* want a kid, I'd prefer to stay single forever than have a kid
Most people say the "best" time to have kids would be from 27 - 32. By that time most people would have a decent career and done all of their wild and crazy activities. My parents had me when they were 32. I'm 31 and they will be 63 this year. I would have to say that I'm very fortunate for being brought up in a middle class family in Chicago. Both of my parents were active in my life and busted their butts to make sure I had most of the things I needed. And I am really close with them. I did grow up with two brothesr who were way older than (12 years/14 years gap). My parents didn't really get the chance to live it up because they had their first kid at 18. Now at they're current age, they are trying to make for lost time (especially my dad - aka mr workaholic). However, I am grateful for all of the fun times I had with them. I remember countless time my dad played video games with me. He was the one that got me into Mortal Kombat. To this day whenever they come and visit we always have to get a few rounds :) I'm sorry you had rough childhood man. I will agree with you though. Time is ticking. I'm single with no kids as well. I was engaged at one point when I was 24 ish, but that got fucked up. I'm giving myself until 35. After that its no goes for me.
"By that time most people would have a decent career and done all of their wild and crazy activities." What about the billions of extraordinarily unlucky ones: too poor since birth to afford wild & crazy activities, held hostage inside prison, sent to war?
This really moved me man. My parents had me and my brother in their early 20's with the absolute decision they wanted me (My mother is in her early 40's and I've just turned 21). They've worked their asses off to raise me and gave me all the opportunities not a lot of kids had. I know deep down they've missed some time for themselves and I'm trying to see how I can pay back for their decades long of hard work. Now I'm actually really independent on my travels and education, pay for my own tuition, work my ass off at my job and pay for my own transportation. Even though I still live with them, I make sure they don't need my dependence. I carry on as an adult of the house, do my taxes on my own and sometimes with assistance, pay my cellular bill, get some groceries for myself and sometimes for my parents. Buy my own booze. Some times I buy a bottle of wine and share with my mother, carrying on a variety of discussions and arguments. They know how expensive it is to live on your own in your early 20's. But what influenced me from considering not having children in the future is from witnessing other families going through their teenage son or daughter suddenly having a kid they did not prepare for, while having their parents raise them while they go to school. I even known some friends of mine that are completely devastated from having kids, even though they wanted one. Damn I even know a few couples that are childless and are so loyal, wealthy and happy as hell. Now they know I absolutely don't want children and want a vasectomy, and they were completely supportive of that and lead me to a urologist (that I will pay from my own funds). I think kids are cute (some of em) and I had the privilege of baby sitting one that called me and my brother his "brown brothers" to his teacher. That moved me a lot. But again, that's just one fortunate kid that I've happen to experience. Can't wait to see him grow up. But a kid like that isn't valid to say my own kid will become like that or similar. In fact, I wouldn't mind being a teacher later on or a tourist for families. I couldn't really see myself as a father figure, but possibly a good uncle or role model. Now that's something to look up to!
Very good point! I'm 27 years old and I don't want to have kids. I just cannot see my self as the father. I had a very bad childhood because my father never liked me and he kicked me out on the street when I was 10. Also, my mother spanked me a lot and I feel that today I have some mental problems because of my childhood. I have a sister 11 years old and my mother behave here on another level compare to mine. I just cannot see my self as the father!
Similar situation here. I keep hearing mostly ppl not wanting kids are those with bad childhoods. Yet we keep being looked at as weird and “not ok” it’s outrageous 😑
Anytime someone tells me he or she doesn’t want kids they never need to explain anything. I think they probably have similar reasons like me. Because I don’t want kids either.
My mom was 36 when I was born and my dad was 28. I made a video on my channel about why I don’t want kids. I’m glad to see there are also men who don’t want them.
You can go two ways in life,you can have fun or you can have kids.i know so many people that their marriages fell apart after having kids,what does that tell you.no kids no support payments!
I agree that it’s nice to hear men talking about this (I’m a childfree woman). It seems like a lot of men don’t really reflect on whether they want kids or not, they just go with the flow. 😅 I guess I’d like to add that there’s a little too much focus on the ”quality” of women’s eggs when it comes to children developing conditions and so on. Even if men technically can have kids until they die, sperm quality declines with age too.
I feel like a lot of people who chose to NOT have kids could basically write a small book on their reasons. Myself included. So many good reasons not to. The "reasons" to have them would basically just be an "ooops".
I couldn't do parenthood fulltime. I love kids to the point that i would return them to their parents. Patience is not in my vocabulary. My sims 3 and sims 4 games are more than enough for me. If I don't like the family i simply delete them and start over. Cant do that in real life. Even though i had a great childhood, i still dont want them.
My uncles have kids way younger than I am. Honestly, I love playing with them, but I still don't want kids. Don't even get me started on the teenage years, certainly don't want to deal with that
95% of the population wants kids. Well I guess being in my 40s has its advantages. People no longer expect me to have children. I have a good excuse now. I’m almost in menopause. But I did have to deal with some annoying people during my 20s and 30s who could not accept my lack of desire to have children.
Hey Mark. (Long comment, beware) I was looking at the comment section and I can only see how encouraging it is for us to become childless. We are both young men and most say that "we'll change our minds" but I see this as a motivation for myself to become childless, I wouldn't even worry about this people. I'm in my early 20's and I've recently scheduled myself to get a vasectomy in the next few months. And being open with my parents and telling them I want this, they were pretty supportive and directed me to a possible urologist 5 minutes away from where I live. The ideology of having kids has been discouraging for me for the past 5 years. I have witnessed a lot of young teenage couples ending up having kids of their own and paying child support, and many of my friends that are childless are travelling from Canada to Japan, Korea, Europe, and working in a pretty decent pay check. And those that have children are actually wishing they were childless. So obviously it's pretty justifiable why you and I want to be childless. I'm getting some feedbacks saying: - "What if you meet a woman that you care about deeply that wants children?". My answer: Well first of all, women that want children completely turn me off and I see it a bit threatening. I think women that don't want kids are extremely sexy ;3. - "Don't you want to wait till your 30 when you absolutely think you want children?". My response: I could yes, but the span of 8 years is a long time that anything could happen. I don't go out to parties and bang bitches. But if I do meet someone that I love in my early to mid 20's and just depend on condoms and birth control, that's a bit risky to me still. There's always that error that things will go down real fast. - "Don't you want to carry on your families genetics?" My response: What kind of question is that? We're not cavemen anymore where the fittest survive anymore. My genes are meaningless right now. We have genetic modifications and vaccinations to help people fight through diseases regardless of genetics. So no, I won't carry on my families genetics. - And the classic "If you don't want kids, don't have sex". My response: Well that's easier said than done my friend. That's defying being naturally human. Everyone at least tried it once in their life. Some others have sex once a week. Most relationships are bonded from having sex without the goal of having children. To tell people "to not have kids is to not have sex in the first place" is like saying "to not get into a car accident is to not get out of the house in the first place". It matters how safe and careful you are. But eventually, you gotta go somewhere. My main reasons why I want to have a vasectomy: - Simply, I just DO NOT WANT KIDS! Period. I think their cute (Some of em). But I can't see myself being the permanent care giver. - I would like to focus on my career and personal well-being. I would love to travel around the world without the care of children and only myself and likely my partner in the future. - Don't want to pay through child support if I happen to be having a kid and going through a break up or divorce - Would like to grow my savings for a possible house project in the far future and other likely projects.
I don't have kids because I simply have no desire to. I feel no want for one and only see them as work and expense that i don't currently have. I don't hate kids either and will always be nice to any I encounter but I simply don't want one myself. Just like some people have no interest in sports i guess and having them just because its what people do or because you'll feel differently when they are your own isn't good enough reason to for me.
Thanks for this video. I am not cut not for kids either. My freedom is so important. I agree, you have to be able to afford to have a pet too.. and also have the time, it is not easy to go on holiday with a pet let alone a kid. Pets and kids tie me down #england
I would suggest if your not in the space or career position to support children I’d take another glance at it there is nothing wrong with you if don’t want children it’s completely normal you’ll end up being the cool uncle or aunt at the end of the day becuase your not stressed out by your own anyways be kind out there ya’ll!
As much as im greatfull that my parents had me I'm certain 💯 percent never want kids.reasons for.... Money .travel. car .less bills .and stress free .and a 🐕.and hustle and make as much
My dad had a neurodegenerative disease called Huntington's Disease. There is no cure and it is fatal. There's a 50% chance i could have the mutated gene, and i have decided i do not want to have my own kids because i don't want them to have to worry about ending up with it or see me go downhill and feel like they need to care for me. I don't want my kids to have to live in the shadow. If i have it well It's gonna end with me. Not trying to bash anyone who has, or is at risk of HD or any other disease and has/wants to have children, but i think it would be morally wrong if i subject my children to suffering when I fully knew the risk.
Yeah. I will stay alone with my life and rather take care of pets all my life. Its so much responsibility.oh lord my god. N i dont want someone controlling my life. With all that diseases coming up, population boom, asteriods threatning, tsunami threat. Fight with lady. Fight with children. Oh lorn my god. Its just too much. My body is not designed for this much pressure. I don wanna get a life in world n screw thier life just for my enjoyment. 😫😫😫😫😫😫😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱Its so scary.
Damn, sorry about what you had to deal with during your childhood. You're still young though, so you can have all the fun you want. I myself never wanted to have children. Now I'm African, so you can probably imagine all kinds of people in my ears talking to me about kids. But I've always had this stance since I was a kid myself. I also don't do relationships, I just pump then dump lol. But just in case you change your mind, early 30s ain't old to have kids if you're a DUDE! lol Keep doing your thing bruh, I'm sure things will work out. Peace.
Ed Denoy Well, I’m not going to raise an annoying kid for 18 years just to have them take care if me when I’m older! And just because you have kids, them taking care of you is not a guarantee!! They will eventually go off on their own lives
Good to hear your thoughts, Mark. I wholeheartedly agree with all! I'm sure I don't have to tell you this, but always use protection. There are women who have no conscience when it comes to "oops-ing". My Mom had me when she was 37, and the generational/cultural chasm was even more profound. She was born in the 1920s (I'm 60), was brought up in "old country" Eastern Europe, and was far more traditional-minded, despite being in an oppressive marriage (my Dad died when I was 7). My two older sisters married while still in their teens, partly in an attempt to replace the father figure in their lives. Both sisters became Mothers immediately, and I saw how parenthood sharply curtailed their freedom, dashed any hopes and dreams they might have entertained, consumed their youth, and made them subject to their controlling husbands. I made the decision at 14 that I wouldn't have kids, and as I grew older, it was a source of escalating friction between my Mom and myself "I didn't raise you to not be a Mother" (her actual words). My Mom died when I was in my early 20s, and while I missed -- and will always miss -- having her in my life, I know she would never have accepted me as a full-fledged grown woman, while remaining single. In her mind, a woman's only path to adulthood was through marriage and children.
It's something I'm afraid of. But when I'm given the opportunity to talk about it, I make it clear I will walk away if they try to trap me into that. The discourages them. I think men should have more of a say in that. LIke, if a woman wants to have an abortion, fine but men should be allowed to have a say in it too. Maybe a legal procedure for being able to walk away for men who are raped/tricked. My mom did bother me for awhile about if she'd have grandkids but she seemed to just give up on it and pseudo accept my step-nephew as a grandchild.
I'm almost 52 years old, I have an 8-year-old and a four-year-old girl. I live in Oregon and the state health insurance pays for checkups and emergency care for free. Over the last two years my wife's practice has not produced enough to go over the poverty limit. So between the child tax credit and mortgage interest rate deduction and a few other things we have paid nothing in taxes in this year received $982 from the state $5600 from federal. We had no idea this would happen. After my wife quit her job at the hospital because of the you- know-what mandates. We thought we would have to use our savings to pay taxes but instead we got almost a $9000 return the first year. You seem like you have a kind disposition very patient and willing to learn you could be a really good dad. What a loss😒
@@TheMarkGoudy Your Purpose should be set by You alone, not your Finances. When I was 30, I wanted kids, but I also thought I wasn't meant to have kids. It wasn't until I found an incredible wife to go on this journey. It also helps that she makes enough money to finance this family. Did you know that women are now 70% of every Ivy League graduating class. Finding an educated money maker shouldn't be too hard. This setup also gets rid of the other argument men have, losing your kids and having to pay child support or alimony in a divorce. My wife also has an incredible office romance that I totally approve of. She works from home lol😉😉 Concerning cost of having a child it's not nearly as much as you think it is. Insurance pays for most of the medical costs the state pays for the schooling, clothing is extremely inexpensive due to Craigslist or Facebook you can get an entire bag of children's clothes for 20 bucks. Last year my son attended a charter school where we received a $1300 return to be used on school expenses Thats about what we pay in property tax bonds for school. If you require that you your child have all the brand new and best of everything yes it can be extremely expensive. Just like if I mandated that I own a Lamborghini in order to drive instead of my 2007 Toyota Rav 4, that would be a lot more expensive. I have had a great life so far, I was in the Army during the Gulf war, then drove a truck for 25 years. Now I trade futures at home. Take risks, or better yet learn to mitigate risks.😃
@@gov2260 christ. A novel. I’m not going to read all that. Just know that I don’t want kids. Nothing to do with my finances. You are trying to force me to do something with my body that I have chosen not to do. That’s not your place.
That last emoji says it all. You are a bitter and miserable person. And you know what they say. Misery needs company. Go talk to your wife and kids, we will enjoy our child free lives.
That’s fine at least someone is doing something better for the earth not like other selfish people good on you I’m childfree and glad I am doesn’t mean we are here we need to raise other people really 🙄
Please could you discuss your upbringing in more detail and perhaps talk about your relationships with parents? I enjoy your content and am interested in you as a person and how you came to be who you are on your channel. Great channel, but I think posting more content would help it grow. Another idea for a video could be "20 random facts about me" or "favourites of the month" ... Such tags would give the viewers more insight into you as a person. Also perhaps a story-time/ advice video about your emotionally abusive/ rocky ex-relationship which you mentioned in a previous video.
Do you want to get married someday? What if she wants/already has children? Does that change things? I have a couple friends who don't want kids and that is fine, but one of them just moved in with a girlfriend who has a child and she says she loves this child even though she doesn't like or want children in general.
Me, no I don't want to be married especially since im 29 never had a girlfreind and is perceived as "shallow" because of my preferences. I'm simply not attracted to black women. (my own race) I'm on SSI I can't drive etc. And I don't want to be with a woman who has given birth either. I also like women that are a handfull of years younger than me. No one under 18 that just gives me the shivers..
Personally, you should never get involved with someone who feels differently about the subject of children than you do. On any level of 'intimate/personal' relationship. Not one night stands, and certainly not dating. You don't want to be childfree and then stuck with a kid they want to keep.
Good thing is there are a lot of sites, forums groups online for childfree men and women. Even meetups just to hang out. Can always meet childfree women
Em A. Not always true because where i live there are no meet up groups for child free people. (I have tried talking to people on child free groups on Facebook but all those people eventually stopped talking to me because the only thing i had in common with them was that they didn’t want kids either. Also none of them live close to me so they didn’t want to be friends with me because they didn’t ever want to travel to see me and I didn’t have money at that time to go visit them. I still don’t have that much money so going to states where most child free people live like florida or California isn’t an option for me. I have talked to a few child free people from Iowa and Minnesota but even they refused to come see me and even though those states are close to where i live I still couldn’t afford to go there because that would still be to expensive for me.) I’m the only person in the state i live in other than my fiancé that doesn’t want kids. So because of that I don’t have any friends here since they all tell me constantly that I shouldn’t be alive just because I don’t want to reproduce. They can’t accept the fact that i dont want kids since they think i have no purpose in life. I told them many times there is more to life than kids but they don’t understand that. I have lived here for 5 years and never met anyone else that doesn’t want kids and i get told by everyone i have talked to that i am the only person they have known in this state that doesn’t want kids so that proves that there are no other child free individuals here. All people here care about is reproducing every year so this definitely isn’t the state to live in for child free people. Thankfully I’m moving next may and then i will be in a state where others are child free and where my choice to never have kids will be accepted.
The fear of being sued or accused of child abuse can actually lead to child neglect and endangerment.There are some people who would not touch a child wandering alongside a busy highway. Not enough protection for good samaritans in this twisted world where you may fall prey to a scam.
@@TheMarkGoudy Well I think some states have good samaritan laws that do offer protections, but very little is known about them. Panic and fear rule over common decency.
I turned 30 in late October and still don’t want kids. I’ve known since high school that I wanted everything to do with not having kids and I am steadfast in my stance on that. My parents don’t understand it but oh well! 😂
Full disclosure, my level of do not want is so strong I probably need therapy. Even AS a kid, I hated kids. As I got older, nothing about the process of pregnancy and birth and raising looked more awful than good. Alot stems from a self hatred- I hate myself to a point I dont want another human even close to being like me. Birth looks disgusting. Sorry not sorry. Dont put it on my chest all soggy and smelly and screaming RIGHT after I just experienced the worst pa in the world short of setting yourself on fire. No, I dont think it's cute when is smears food everywhere. No I dont think it's cute that they just learned how to nod. Congrats, you can move your neck, so glad it took you 4 months just to do that....yeah I'm gonna stop. It's pretty clear I shouldn't reproduce.
Kids are just dead weight for most people. Only if you have a shitload of money,it could make sense to have kids. Because then you could hire babysitters and pay for daycare and school and whatever.
What you’re talking about resonates with my experience. I didn’t have much of a childhood either so I’m definitely enjoying letting my creative inner child shine at 41. Its never too late. You deserve to listen to your inner child too. Make the most of your deserved freedom. All the best 😘🤞🏻
Also I had a parent that was constantly ill - and still is- and I made a vow that in 2019 that I’m not responsible for their own sense of worthlessness. It all comes to their own perception and to be honest, you aren’t the caretaker of your parents. You aren’t responsible. I hope you realize this sooner than I did. It took me 40 yrs
Hi Mark. You might be interested in my book "Planned UnParenthood - Creating A Life Without Procreating". It's available online through many of the usual places. Cheers.
Mark, My mom was 38 when I was born. So I can understand what it's like to have older parents. And I'm my mom's legal guardian. My mom is elderly and unwell.
I personally don't want kids either, however I'm the one pressured to babysit by those who have children, contribute to expensive items at baby showers, pay extra taxes for being single/no depends. Parents: give us a grand child. Me: okay, I'll fr give you full custody if i do. Parents: ... I'm not raising children. (Then I'm told the challenges 😂) Somehow, some way i get involved. Feeling like a Taylor Swift song: i swear i dont love the drama. It loves me 😅
I simply don’t like kids. And not good around them. I know I don’t want or need to be a parent. I’m going to live my life how I WANT, not how society wants lol
On a silly note, my bf was ranting about how kids take all of the theater seats on a weekend when our lack of planning was confronted when trying to get into a sold out Despicable Me 2 movie LOL!! he was cracking me up when he was saying "they dont work, they take all of the seats, they ruin it for me!" I was dying from laughter! I think my bf is jealous of kids sometimes, bc when our neighbors son walked out with a spider man costume during the summer, and I asked him "are you jealous? lol" and he was like "yes! LOL! look at that kid having all of the fun"
Not changing a diaper? Haha, come on guy.. Yes I expect men to change diapers, do dishes, cook etc. just how I expect myself to work while also doing those domestic duties. Idk if I will have kids but shit is not that scary. (I work in healthcare.)
+Namaka Lis What is your problem? I don't want to change a diaper so suddenly I can't do anything you assign as a woman's role? It has nothing to do with fear. It's my choice . You have no right to take that from me.
+MarkGoudy Well said, Mark. Healthcare workers are actually kind of stupid, BION. Yes. I said that. No, you do not have any obligation to agree with me. What is my evidence for such a generalization? The way every single one of them, from nurses to surgeons, is 100% unaware of what healthcare costs or even whether their billing departments even charge anything for certain services (they ALWAYS do, but the healtcare people are 100% unaware). Plus, just some of the DUMBEST people I've met have been nurses (they HAPPEN to be female nurses, but, their gender IS unimportant).
Alright. What about people who have never had a 'significant' relationship? Is it normal for middle aged people to have never really been in a real relationship. Or even not care if it doesnt ever happen?
You are funny w/o trying! I can relate! I get so upset even when sister tries to pass her kids along to being my responsibility. Like No. You kept having babies. That was your choice not mine. I'll babysit sometimes but only if it doesn't inconvenience me. Lol
Mark : You can have my five rug rats if you get bored because you can at least have a tax break but you have to pay for their college education, food , clothing ,dental needs , health care costs. Having kids will definitely force you to grow up quickly for the 1st 18 years of their life.Unfortunately when they become teenagers you will have to cope with their drama.
Well, it looks like antinatalism can be wrong if there is an alternative if life sucks. What if you can exit anytime? I think that antinatalists are fighting for the wrong cause, let me explain why: Imagine that there is a right to exit for free anytime anywhere for anyone no matter age or health condition and this is acceptable by society as norm, will there still be a problem to procreate ? So I think that you are fighting for the wrong cause. All of you should fight for the right to exit for anyone anywhere anytime for free with free cremation.
@@TheMarkGoudy Well. let me educate you: Not wanting kids is seen negative by society, especially in "US and A". You can have a bunch of kids, but with the condition that they have the right to exit anytime anywhere, for free, painless, assisted for free by doctors, free cremation and other things for free in this process of exiting life, Will procreation still be a problem for you? I see lot's of people these day fighting for the wrong reasons: childfree, antinatalists, efilists, atheists. All these problems can be solved by giving people the right to exit anytime anywhere in the world.
@@TheMarkGoudy There will always be people forcing someone into existence, so in the end there will be two types of people: 1) who want to exist till they change their mind, when they get ill or older; 2) who does not want to exist; Not all people think they are forced into existence, that's the problem.
I'm not antinatalist. I'm not fighting and I don't have a cause. I've made a decision about what I want to do and I gave my reasons. Nothing in this video tells anyone else what THEY should do. I don't think that having kids is morally wrong, it's just not what I want. I support the right to assisted suicide but there's more that you haven't considered. What about how their "right to exit" affects others? Who is going to pay for free cremation and why is that the only option?
@@usalawlemon I don't think you listened to my reasoning in the video. Just because the kids could kill themselves at any time, that doesn't address the reasons I gave.
Hey mark I totally understand your reasons for not wanting children. But for some reason i know you would be a great father based on what you been through.
you are just missing the best experience of all, moments that cant be valuable, so mmm... things that really matter cost, you know. And the sacrifice really matters. have a good life :)
Having children is a choice and you shouldn't be judged by it. I know i might be too young to choose that i don't want kids (i'm almost 15) but I think parenthood is a very hard task to do and you need patiece, will and love especialy for mothers since they do a lot of work, not saying that dads don't have to hard work to rise their children
I'm so glad I'm not a parent. I have money, can sleep and relax, travel, little stress, enjoy life and the finer things
Same dude same
Sonja, da nisi ti negdje blizu mene možda :) ?
Sleep and a low stress life is very important. You typically look/age better than most parents
why do people who are not yet parents fail to observe happy people like yourself, then when they reach child bearing age, still have kids?
I can believe that.
The reason why I don't want kids is because I just want to have the whole life and fun to myself and focus on of what I like to do.
Agreed! People don't understand that you can have an equally happy life without kids.
Yess agreed same here I love kids and stuff but I reather have fun in life and do my thing plus kids are very expensive
Im with you. My mother gets very upset when i tell her. If i dont marry at the age of 34... she will never talk to me . Im now 29 .... do u have advice to me?
@@Ava-bp1ze relationships 101. you can't control another persons behaviour, only your own. call her bluff and if she keeps talking to you but talking shit be straight up. tell her that you will see her and talk with her less and less depending on how much she comes at you. you permit what you tolerate.
Exactly. The planet is overpopulated anyway.
My #1 reason: child support payments. The moment you create a kid you become a slave who doesn't even have a right to keep enough of your hard earned money to sustain your dignity.
No, thanks.
Valid point, eloquently written and funny too. 😂
If that's your number one reason, then you shouldn't get married either for fear of splitting assets.
your age group?
When I think that one condom tear/or lying woman can have me on the hook for 18 years, it makes me glad that I can afford cocaine and hookers.
I don't have kids and I'm 47 and I feel happy everyday. I don't want kids. if I have kids there goes all my money and stress on them. right now I'm happy because I'm free from all that . I've gotten so used to spending my own money how I want to spend it and focus on myself.It feels great
I knew at 17 I didn't want kid's. Made it permanent @ 22. I tell people I'll have kid's when I grow up. I'm 58, and have NO intentions of growing up!
Me either lol
In other words, you don’t want children because you are a manchild and are ostensibly proud of that fact?
@@muz1658 It's a figure of speech professor.
@@muz1658 funny cus there are so many manchild even after getting married so your point doesn't stand
I can believe that.
you should get a tax return for not having kids
Victor Ramirez 👏🏾👏🏾 I agree
Why? Kids are future consumers. As you age you will consume less. That is less contribution to jobs and tax revenue.
@@silasbishop3055 Less human beings leaving a carbon footprint, less damage to the earth. Less people milking off the system. These are very real scenarios that also impact money and taxes.
@@silasbishop3055 Typical myopic breeder response.
@@vladram9084 On the contrary, declining birth rates in the West is a massive crisis. If a nation is not capable of self-preservation, it will cease to exist. Do you not have an obligation towards your ancestors, and towards your race to carry the torch of self-propagation which has been carried for hundreds of thousands of years? Do you really not see any moral issue with being a genetic dead end, and valuing your own pleasure and comfort over the lives of your unborn offspring?
You had older parents who didn't give you a childhood. I'm oldest of 5 kids and looked after my younger siblings while my parents who were young when I was born were being kids at the expense of my teen years. By the time I had finished school I had wiped all the snotty noses and dirty behinds I ever thought I'd ever have to.
So, having a vasectomy at 22 wasn't that much of a decision for me and have never regretted it. Have told very few people I've done it and feel under no obligation to explain myself to anyone. If they want me to have kids, they can pay for them and raise them. Until then, it's none of there business and I don't answer to them.
Yes, I'm going to live my life. Am I making up for lost teen years? You can't make up for lost time. You can make the most of the time ahead and that's what I'm doing. I had my taste of parenthood. Am now moving on. All my baggage has wheels and you can't see me for dust!!
I love this comment. Please come by youtube channel to see watch my video on being childfree
Similar experience to me. I told my Mom when I was a teen that I would never become a parent.
I had a childhood just like yours! I had to take care of my younger siblings and did not get to be a teenager just the maid and nanny! I never had any children of my own for that reason.
I’m a Nigerian guy (West Africa). I never want kids. I didn’t know there were guys just like me around the world. Keep it up 👍I subscribed
It's because you are smart.
I can't wait until I'm gone.
😂
I can so relate to this! My mom was 37 and my dad was 46...we have almost nothing in common. I'm 26 and I don't want kids either, only want to focus on my career goals. Nice vid 👍
divatart90 I was 37 and my hubby was 59, when we had our only and planned daughter after 10 years of marriage.
Happy international Child free day
I'm really happy to see more men talking about this. Obviously this issue HUGELY affects women, but there doesn't seem to be many guys who talk about this, so thank you!
it affects a man HUGHLY if he's in love with a woman , she wants them, he never even considered it because he saw no value in it, just like he never considered vacationing in Mongolia , not sure this qualifies as "talking" about it, but I'll let music and photographs do my talking> ruclips.net/video/jqkmFszKWCo/видео.html
I'm just like you - no exposure to kids when I was growing up and don't know how to talk to kids. Also, I think extroverts are much better with kids. As an introvert, I find them intrusive and exhausting.
Can totally relate. Dont want kids either and hate people saying I will change my mind. They are some Facebook pages that have people in the same boat. Also, can say they your childhood was different, but closely relatable to as well. Barley had childhood or teenage years. Was pushed to be a adult at young age.
Not offended here and ignore those saying you'll want kids later. There are people in the same boat as you.
they can say I'll change my mind all they want. I just smile, say ok, and then what else is on your mind?
I think being with the person they want to be with is more important. Like some people wouldn't leave there partner just because there partner can't have kids or doesn't want them. Even if they wanted kids
im turning 40 soon. never liked kids, never will.
95% is really sad if that's true. I honestly believe in this day and age, people who choose to have children in this world of excess human have more explaining to do than those who don't. It's time we stopped being anxious about this subject, and stopped feeling the need to explain our completely rational choice. Those who want or have children never get asked why they're choosing that path in the face of so many difficulties in the world right now. It's time for a paradigm shift.
maybe in the 1950's but in modern times I'd say its 20 -25% lower than that.
For men..you are tied as a Jr partner to the will a woman, who can abort a mans offspring at will.. or decide he is good enough and have a baby and soon a pension ...one way or another.
I think it's great men have learned.
I understand why women don't want children either...
Okay, I love children like my nieces and nephews, but I don't want to have children on my own 😱
Why is that if you don’t mind me asking?
I'm single man in my 40's and I don't want any of my own kids ever.I'm a mentally challenged man with special needs and mental heal problems.I have a.d.d.depression,anxiety disorder.i live on both low income and disability money.i had a very bad childhood.
+Larry Kuehn I understand. My childhood was bad as well. I'm sure that's part of why I don't want kids.
that's good.I'm a gay single man without kids.I have had some single fathers asked me out on dates in the past and I tell them no way.They think I'm being selfish just because I don't want my own kids ever.Most of my relatives and old high school friend that's my current landlord that are parents accept that about me unlike some strangers that think they are better than me and try to tell me that Jesus is a married man with kids.I know that's not true even thou I'm an old fashioned man or religious man.
I have TOTAL sympathy for BOTH your (Mark Goudy, Larry Kuehn) situations.
I had the BEST possible NEARLY PERFECT secular non-religious intelligent parents one could have
and the BEST most comfortable childhood a child could have. Yet, I STILL feel the same way you do.
I have ADDITIONAL reasons for opposing breeding, of course, but both of YOUR reasons are MORE than sufficient! Best of luck for both of you!!
I'm a proud non-religious spiritual man.I'm a modern man not an old fashioned man.
my advice is to stay off social media because all you will see is friends and family posting pics of their kids because thats all they got they are a shell of who they once were, after a while someone or something will try to guilt trip you into having a child because everyone else has them but stay strong and dont give in i personally disconnected from social media and this helped me to really be secure in my decision, influence and guilt can play a big role in a persons decision in life.
Same don’t want kids to I hate when people annoy me for on reason it’s no ones business if I don’t want kids and that makes me happy then yeah rather have a pet
I think I found my type same I don’t want kids because you give birth to it makes me sick and crying changing nappies taking them to school looking after them and everything I’m not doing that sorry I want to live my life travel work have lots of money and a nice car that’s all love is more important to me
Same Girl 🥰
I'm 23 and loathe the thought of having kids...... reason?
Because i don't want something that's more expensive than a horse and drains money like water through a sieve, i have lot's of fragile things that i do not want to put away, i like having my swords on display, like spending my money on myself and always want dogs and cats...... kids don't mix with anything i like..., call me selfish if you like but i *NEVER EVER!* want a kid, I'd prefer to stay single forever than have a kid
Same Girl i am a cats mother and i loove it
You have cats that is 🤢
@@ericortega1745 you have kids, that is 🤢
Most people say the "best" time to have kids would be from 27 - 32. By that time most people would have a decent career and done all of their wild and crazy activities. My parents had me when they were 32. I'm 31 and they will be 63 this year. I would have to say that I'm very fortunate for being brought up in a middle class family in Chicago. Both of my parents were active in my life and busted their butts to make sure I had most of the things I needed. And I am really close with them. I did grow up with two brothesr who were way older than (12 years/14 years gap). My parents didn't really get the chance to live it up because they had their first kid at 18. Now at they're current age, they are trying to make for lost time (especially my dad - aka mr workaholic). However, I am grateful for all of the fun times I had with them. I remember countless time my dad played video games with me. He was the one that got me into Mortal Kombat. To this day whenever they come and visit we always have to get a few rounds :)
I'm sorry you had rough childhood man. I will agree with you though. Time is ticking. I'm single with no kids as well. I was engaged at one point when I was 24 ish, but that got fucked up. I'm giving myself until 35. After that its no goes for me.
"By that time most people would have a decent career and done all of their wild and crazy activities."
What about the billions of extraordinarily unlucky ones: too poor since birth to afford wild & crazy activities,
held hostage inside prison, sent to war?
Nevertheless, I had the most perfect parents in the universe, too. Born & raised in New Jersey.
This really moved me man. My parents had me and my brother in their early 20's with the absolute decision they wanted me (My mother is in her early 40's and I've just turned 21). They've worked their asses off to raise me and gave me all the opportunities not a lot of kids had. I know deep down they've missed some time for themselves and I'm trying to see how I can pay back for their decades long of hard work. Now I'm actually really independent on my travels and education, pay for my own tuition, work my ass off at my job and pay for my own transportation. Even though I still live with them, I make sure they don't need my dependence. I carry on as an adult of the house, do my taxes on my own and sometimes with assistance, pay my cellular bill, get some groceries for myself and sometimes for my parents. Buy my own booze. Some times I buy a bottle of wine and share with my mother, carrying on a variety of discussions and arguments. They know how expensive it is to live on your own in your early 20's. But what influenced me from considering not having children in the future is from witnessing other families going through their teenage son or daughter suddenly having a kid they did not prepare for, while having their parents raise them while they go to school. I even known some friends of mine that are completely devastated from having kids, even though they wanted one. Damn I even know a few couples that are childless and are so loyal, wealthy and happy as hell.
Now they know I absolutely don't want children and want a vasectomy, and they were completely supportive of that and lead me to a urologist (that I will pay from my own funds). I think kids are cute (some of em) and I had the privilege of baby sitting one that called me and my brother his "brown brothers" to his teacher. That moved me a lot. But again, that's just one fortunate kid that I've happen to experience. Can't wait to see him grow up. But a kid like that isn't valid to say my own kid will become like that or similar. In fact, I wouldn't mind being a teacher later on or a tourist for families. I couldn't really see myself as a father figure, but possibly a good uncle or role model. Now that's something to look up to!
Very good point! I'm 27 years old and I don't want to have kids. I just cannot see my self as the father. I had a very bad childhood because my father never liked me and he kicked me out on the street when I was 10. Also, my mother spanked me a lot and I feel that today I have some mental problems because of my childhood. I have a sister 11 years old and my mother behave here on another level compare to mine. I just cannot see my self as the father!
Similar situation here. I keep hearing mostly ppl not wanting kids are those with bad childhoods. Yet we keep being looked at as weird and “not ok” it’s outrageous 😑
Anytime someone tells me he or she doesn’t want kids they never need to explain anything.
I think they probably have similar reasons like me.
Because I don’t want kids either.
they don't NEED to explain but I prefer that they do, just so I know some good answers to share publicly.
You are a smart gentleman. Props to you.
My mom was 36 when I was born and my dad was 28.
I made a video on my channel about why I don’t want kids.
I’m glad to see there are also men who don’t want them.
It donest matter how old I am I don’t want kids and don’t want something in me because I’m smart
You can go two ways in life,you can have fun or you can have kids.i know so many people that their marriages fell apart after having kids,what does that tell you.no kids no support payments!
That's another reason not to have them. You can give 100% and if the other person's not willing to, it'll still end in divorce.
I can relate to that Mark about you not wanting to have kids. I never had kids either because I never wanted kids.
Don’t want any to I would rather have a cat dog or bird I have two birds and one cat I’m happy that’s it
I agree that it’s nice to hear men talking about this (I’m a childfree woman). It seems like a lot of men don’t really reflect on whether they want kids or not, they just go with the flow. 😅 I guess I’d like to add that there’s a little too much focus on the ”quality” of women’s eggs when it comes to children developing conditions and so on. Even if men technically can have kids until they die, sperm quality declines with age too.
Don’t worry, you didn’t offend me at all.
Thank you for your honesty.
It’s so interesting to hear it from a man‘s point of view.
I feel like a lot of people who chose to NOT have kids could basically write a small book on their reasons. Myself included. So many good reasons not to. The "reasons" to have them would basically just be an "ooops".
I couldn't do parenthood fulltime. I love kids to the point that i would return them to their parents. Patience is not in my vocabulary. My sims 3 and sims 4 games are more than enough for me. If I don't like the family i simply delete them and start over. Cant do that in real life. Even though i had a great childhood, i still dont want them.
You and I share a similar reason for not wanting kids. This video was good and I was able to resonate with it
My uncles have kids way younger than I am. Honestly, I love playing with them, but I still don't want kids. Don't even get me started on the teenage years, certainly don't want to deal with that
I'm blessed I'm not a young father and nor will I ever have a child or get married.not giving up my path on what I want to do in life
95% of the population wants kids. Well I guess being in my 40s has its advantages. People no longer expect me to have children. I have a good excuse now. I’m almost in menopause. But I did have to deal with some annoying people during my 20s and 30s who could not accept my lack of desire to have children.
I can relate. I was around alot of adults and kids my age when I was growing up. I wasn't around tiny babies that often.
Hey Mark. (Long comment, beware)
I was looking at the comment section and I can only see how encouraging it is for us to become childless. We are both young men and most say that "we'll change our minds" but I see this as a motivation for myself to become childless, I wouldn't even worry about this people.
I'm in my early 20's and I've recently scheduled myself to get a vasectomy in the next few months. And being open with my parents and telling them I want this, they were pretty supportive and directed me to a possible urologist 5 minutes away from where I live. The ideology of having kids has been discouraging for me for the past 5 years. I have witnessed a lot of young teenage couples ending up having kids of their own and paying child support, and many of my friends that are childless are travelling from Canada to Japan, Korea, Europe, and working in a pretty decent pay check. And those that have children are actually wishing they were childless. So obviously it's pretty justifiable why you and I want to be childless.
I'm getting some feedbacks saying:
- "What if you meet a woman that you care about deeply that wants children?". My answer: Well first of all, women that want children completely turn me off and I see it a bit threatening. I think women that don't want kids are extremely sexy ;3.
- "Don't you want to wait till your 30 when you absolutely think you want children?".
My response: I could yes, but the span of 8 years is a long time that anything could happen. I don't go out to parties and bang bitches. But if I do meet someone that I love in my early to mid 20's and just depend on condoms and birth control, that's a bit risky to me still. There's always that error that things will go down real fast.
- "Don't you want to carry on your families genetics?"
My response: What kind of question is that? We're not cavemen anymore where the fittest survive anymore. My genes are meaningless right now. We have genetic modifications and vaccinations to help people fight through diseases regardless of genetics. So no, I won't carry on my families genetics.
- And the classic "If you don't want kids, don't have sex".
My response: Well that's easier said than done my friend. That's defying being naturally human. Everyone at least tried it once in their life. Some others have sex once a week. Most relationships are bonded from having sex without the goal of having children. To tell people "to not have kids is to not have sex in the first place" is like saying "to not get into a car accident is to not get out of the house in the first place". It matters how safe and careful you are. But eventually, you gotta go somewhere.
My main reasons why I want to have a vasectomy:
- Simply, I just DO NOT WANT KIDS! Period. I think their cute (Some of em). But I can't see myself being the permanent care giver.
- I would like to focus on my career and personal well-being. I would love to travel around the world without the care of children and only myself and likely my partner in the future.
- Don't want to pay through child support if I happen to be having a kid and going through a break up or divorce
- Would like to grow my savings for a possible house project in the far future and other likely projects.
I’m a woman who doesn’t want kids and never wanted them 🤝 Agree with all u listed
I don't have kids because I simply have no desire to. I feel no want for one and only see them as work and expense that i don't currently have. I don't hate kids either and will always be nice to any I encounter but I simply don't want one myself. Just like some people have no interest in sports i guess and having them just because its what people do or because you'll feel differently when they are your own isn't good enough reason to for me.
Your life so your choice i can respect that
Thanks for this video. I am not cut not for kids either. My freedom is so important. I agree, you have to be able to afford to have a pet too.. and also have the time, it is not easy to go on holiday with a pet let alone a kid. Pets and kids tie me down #england
Who choose being childfree is a right for have freedom.
Smart, kind and wise people who choose childfree.
I am in the same boat. I had to parent my parents as well. I love how honest you are.
I would suggest if your not in the space or career position to support children I’d take another glance at it there is nothing wrong with you if don’t want children it’s completely normal you’ll end up being the cool uncle or aunt at the end of the day becuase your not stressed out by your own anyways be kind out there ya’ll!
As much as im greatfull that my parents had me I'm certain 💯 percent never want kids.reasons for....
Money .travel. car .less bills .and stress free .and a 🐕.and hustle and make as much
My dad had a neurodegenerative disease called Huntington's Disease. There is no cure and it is fatal. There's a 50% chance i could have the mutated gene, and i have decided i do not want to have my own kids because i don't want them to have to worry about ending up with it or see me go downhill and feel like they need to care for me. I don't want my kids to have to live in the shadow. If i have it well It's gonna end with me. Not trying to bash anyone who has, or is at risk of HD or any other disease and has/wants to have children, but i think it would be morally wrong if i subject my children to suffering when I fully knew the risk.
Yeah. I will stay alone with my life and rather take care of pets all my life.
Its so much responsibility.oh lord my god. N i dont want someone controlling my life. With all that diseases coming up, population boom, asteriods threatning, tsunami threat. Fight with lady. Fight with children. Oh lorn my god. Its just too much. My body is not designed for this much pressure. I don wanna get a life in world n screw thier life just for my enjoyment. 😫😫😫😫😫😫😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱Its so scary.
Damn, sorry about what you had to deal with during your childhood. You're still young though, so you can have all the fun you want. I myself never wanted to have children. Now I'm African, so you can probably imagine all kinds of people in my ears talking to me about kids. But I've always had this stance since I was a kid myself. I also don't do relationships, I just pump then dump lol.
But just in case you change your mind, early 30s ain't old to have kids if you're a DUDE! lol
Keep doing your thing bruh, I'm sure things will work out. Peace.
But who will change your diaper when you get old ?
Ed Denoy Well, I’m not going to raise an annoying kid for 18 years just to have them take care if me when I’m older! And just because you have kids, them taking care of you is not a guarantee!! They will eventually go off on their own lives
@@kendalstubblefield3096 LOL in these days your annoying kid will live with you until 30 years , not for just 18 years !
Good to hear your thoughts, Mark. I wholeheartedly agree with all! I'm sure I don't have to tell you this, but always use protection. There are women who have no conscience when it comes to "oops-ing". My Mom had me when she was 37, and the generational/cultural chasm was even more profound. She was born in the 1920s (I'm 60), was brought up in "old country" Eastern Europe, and was far more traditional-minded, despite being in an oppressive marriage (my Dad died when I was 7). My two older sisters married while still in their teens, partly in an attempt to replace the father figure in their lives. Both sisters became Mothers immediately, and I saw how parenthood sharply curtailed their freedom, dashed any hopes and dreams they might have entertained, consumed their youth, and made them subject to their controlling husbands. I made the decision at 14 that I wouldn't have kids, and as I grew older, it was a source of escalating friction between my Mom and myself "I didn't raise you to not be a Mother" (her actual words). My Mom died when I was in my early 20s, and while I missed -- and will always miss -- having her in my life, I know she would never have accepted me as a full-fledged grown woman, while remaining single. In her mind, a woman's only path to adulthood was through marriage and children.
It's something I'm afraid of. But when I'm given the opportunity to talk about it, I make it clear I will walk away if they try to trap me into that. The discourages them. I think men should have more of a say in that. LIke, if a woman wants to have an abortion, fine but men should be allowed to have a say in it too. Maybe a legal procedure for being able to walk away for men who are raped/tricked.
My mom did bother me for awhile about if she'd have grandkids but she seemed to just give up on it and pseudo accept my step-nephew as a grandchild.
I'm almost 52 years old, I have an 8-year-old and a four-year-old girl. I live in Oregon and the state health insurance pays for checkups and emergency care for free. Over the last two years my wife's practice has not produced enough to go over the poverty limit. So between the child tax credit and mortgage interest rate deduction and a few other things we have paid nothing in taxes in this year received $982 from the state $5600 from federal. We had no idea this would happen. After my wife quit her job at the hospital because of the you- know-what mandates. We thought we would have to use our savings to pay taxes but instead we got almost a $9000 return the first year. You seem like you have a kind disposition very patient and willing to learn you could be a really good dad. What a loss😒
Why do you think it’s my purpose to produce children?
@@TheMarkGoudy Your Purpose should be set by You alone, not your Finances.
When I was 30, I wanted kids, but I also thought I wasn't meant to have kids. It wasn't until I found an incredible wife to go on this journey. It also helps that she makes enough money to finance this family. Did you know that women are now 70% of every Ivy League graduating class. Finding an educated money maker shouldn't be too hard. This setup also gets rid of the other argument men have, losing your kids and having to pay child support or alimony in a divorce. My wife also has an incredible office romance that I totally approve of. She works from home lol😉😉
Concerning cost of having a child it's not nearly as much as you think it is. Insurance pays for most of the medical costs the state pays for the schooling, clothing is extremely inexpensive due to Craigslist or Facebook you can get an entire bag of children's clothes for 20 bucks. Last year my son attended a charter school where we received a $1300 return to be used on school expenses Thats about what we pay in property tax bonds for school. If you require that you your child have all the brand new and best of everything yes it can be extremely expensive. Just like if I mandated that I own a Lamborghini in order to drive instead of my 2007 Toyota Rav 4, that would be a lot more expensive. I have had a great life so far, I was in the Army during the Gulf war, then drove a truck for 25 years. Now I trade futures at home.
Take risks, or better yet learn to mitigate risks.😃
@@gov2260 christ. A novel. I’m not going to read all that. Just know that I don’t want kids. Nothing to do with my finances. You are trying to force me to do something with my body that I have chosen not to do. That’s not your place.
That last emoji says it all. You are a bitter and miserable person. And you know what they say. Misery needs company. Go talk to your wife and kids, we will enjoy our child free lives.
@Apricot90 Society thanks you for deleting yourself from the gene pool.
That’s fine at least someone is doing something better for the earth not like other selfish people good on you I’m childfree and glad I am doesn’t mean we are here we need to raise other people really 🙄
Please could you discuss your upbringing in more detail and perhaps talk about your relationships with parents? I enjoy your content and am interested in you as a person and how you came to be who you are on your channel. Great channel, but I think posting more content would help it grow. Another idea for a video could be "20 random facts about me" or "favourites of the month" ... Such tags would give the viewers more insight into you as a person. Also perhaps a story-time/ advice video about your emotionally abusive/ rocky ex-relationship which you mentioned in a previous video.
Do you want to get married someday? What if she wants/already has children? Does that change things? I have a couple friends who don't want kids and that is fine, but one of them just moved in with a girlfriend who has a child and she says she loves this child even though she doesn't like or want children in general.
I've always wanted to get married. I would never consider even dating a women who has kids.
Me, no I don't want to be married especially since im 29 never had a girlfreind and is perceived as "shallow" because of my preferences. I'm simply not attracted to black women. (my own race) I'm on SSI I can't drive etc. And I don't want to be with a woman who has given birth either. I also like women that are a handfull of years younger than me. No one under 18 that just gives me the shivers..
Personally, you should never get involved with someone who feels differently about the subject of children than you do. On any level of 'intimate/personal' relationship. Not one night stands, and certainly not dating. You don't want to be childfree and then stuck with a kid they want to keep.
Good thing is there are a lot of sites, forums groups online for childfree men and women. Even meetups just to hang out. Can always meet childfree women
Em A. Not always true because where i live there are no meet up groups for child free people. (I have tried talking to people on child free groups on Facebook but all those people eventually stopped talking to me because the only thing i had in common with them was that they didn’t want kids either. Also none of them live close to me so they didn’t want to be friends with me because they didn’t ever want to travel to see me and I didn’t have money at that time to go visit them. I still don’t have that much money so going to states where most child free people live like florida or California isn’t an option for me. I have talked to a few child free people from Iowa and Minnesota but even they refused to come see me and even though those states are close to where i live I still couldn’t afford to go there because that would still be to expensive for me.) I’m the only person in the state i live in other than my fiancé that doesn’t want kids. So because of that I don’t have any friends here since they all tell me constantly that I shouldn’t be alive just because I don’t want to reproduce. They can’t accept the fact that i dont want kids since they think i have no purpose in life. I told them many times there is more to life than kids but they don’t understand that. I have lived here for 5 years and never met anyone else that doesn’t want kids and i get told by everyone i have talked to that i am the only person they have known in this state that doesn’t want kids so that proves that there are no other child free individuals here. All people here care about is reproducing every year so this definitely isn’t the state to live in for child free people.
Thankfully I’m moving next may and then i will be in a state where others are child free and where my choice to never have kids will be accepted.
The fear of being sued or accused of child abuse can actually lead to child neglect and endangerment.There are some people who would not touch a child wandering alongside a busy highway. Not enough protection for good samaritans in this twisted world where you may fall prey to a scam.
I've thought of that. It's bad enough I don't want to be around them in the first place and then be accused of something.
@@TheMarkGoudy Well I think some states have good samaritan laws that do offer protections, but very little is known about them. Panic and fear rule over common decency.
I turned 30 in late October and still don’t want kids. I’ve known since high school that I wanted everything to do with not having kids and I am steadfast in my stance on that. My parents don’t understand it but oh well! 😂
Full disclosure, my level of do not want is so strong I probably need therapy. Even AS a kid, I hated kids. As I got older, nothing about the process of pregnancy and birth and raising looked more awful than good. Alot stems from a self hatred- I hate myself to a point I dont want another human even close to being like me. Birth looks disgusting. Sorry not sorry. Dont put it on my chest all soggy and smelly and screaming RIGHT after I just experienced the worst pa in the world short of setting yourself on fire. No, I dont think it's cute when is smears food everywhere. No I dont think it's cute that they just learned how to nod. Congrats, you can move your neck, so glad it took you 4 months just to do that....yeah I'm gonna stop. It's pretty clear I shouldn't reproduce.
Kids are just dead weight for most people.
Only if you have a shitload of money,it could make sense to have kids.
Because then you could hire babysitters and pay for daycare and school and whatever.
I just want to spend all of my own money and time on myself, not on a child. I think that's pretty normal.
What you’re talking about resonates with my experience. I didn’t have much of a childhood either so I’m definitely enjoying
letting my creative inner child shine at 41. Its never too late. You deserve to listen to your inner child too. Make the most of your deserved freedom. All the best 😘🤞🏻
Also I had a parent that was constantly ill - and still is- and I
made a vow that in 2019 that I’m not responsible for their own sense of worthlessness. It all comes to their own perception and to be honest, you aren’t the caretaker of your parents. You aren’t responsible. I hope you realize this sooner than I did. It took me 40 yrs
Marriage and children a lose , lose situation, especially for men .
Hi Mark. You might be interested in my book "Planned UnParenthood - Creating A Life Without Procreating". It's available online through many of the usual places. Cheers.
Child development class and a little spoiled brats at church made me not want to have kids
Happy Childfree Day
Thank God I'm not alone
I didn't sign for this 😂😂😂😂😂👍🏻
Mark, My mom was 38 when I was born. So I can understand what it's like to have older parents. And I'm my mom's legal guardian. My mom is elderly and unwell.
Uber and Lyft can’t legally take children by themselves.
I personally don't want kids either, however I'm the one pressured to babysit by those who have children, contribute to expensive items at baby showers, pay extra taxes for being single/no depends.
Parents: give us a grand child.
Me: okay, I'll fr give you full custody if i do.
Parents: ... I'm not raising children. (Then I'm told the challenges 😂)
Somehow, some way i get involved.
Feeling like a Taylor Swift song: i swear i dont love the drama. It loves me 😅
This is what your "Family Portrait" will look like when you start a family with an old man.
⚰️👰🐣
Do you really want this?
Good points. I am cf myself. However 2:25 news flash thats the stuff a woman is avoiding too.
I simply don’t like kids. And not good around them. I know I don’t want or need to be a parent. I’m going to live my life how I WANT, not how society wants lol
On a silly note, my bf was ranting about how kids take all of the theater seats on a weekend when our lack of planning was confronted when trying to get into a sold out Despicable Me 2 movie LOL!! he was cracking me up when he was saying "they dont work, they take all of the seats, they ruin it for me!" I was dying from laughter! I think my bf is jealous of kids sometimes, bc when our neighbors son walked out with a spider man costume during the summer, and I asked him "are you jealous? lol" and he was like "yes! LOL! look at that kid having all of the fun"
I have a black panther costume and I am a 24 year old indian woman. You're never too old to have fun!
I think you are more fun with kids than you are made yo believe. I loved your story of how you interact with them.
Not changing a diaper? Haha, come on guy..
Yes I expect men to change diapers, do dishes, cook etc. just how I expect myself to work while also doing those domestic duties.
Idk if I will have kids but shit is not that scary. (I work in healthcare.)
+Namaka Lis What is your problem? I don't want to change a diaper so suddenly I can't do anything you assign as a woman's role? It has nothing to do with fear. It's my choice . You have no right to take that from me.
MarkGoudy tell him bro
+MarkGoudy Well said, Mark. Healthcare workers are actually kind of stupid, BION.
Yes. I said that. No, you do not have any obligation to agree with me.
What is my evidence for such a generalization? The way every single one of them, from nurses to surgeons, is 100% unaware of what healthcare costs or even whether their billing departments even charge anything for certain services (they ALWAYS do, but the healtcare people are 100% unaware).
Plus, just some of the DUMBEST people I've met have been nurses (they HAPPEN to be female nurses,
but, their gender IS unimportant).
Me neither !
Well...I wouldn't put a kindergartner in a Uber. I would drive the kid to school or get their guardian to take them.
Would yo put a kindergartner in a tax?
Nice because I don’t want kids for sure
more power to you man
also, I hope you didn't let the kid ride an uber alone!
Most uber drivers are very nice and helpful people. I'm saying from experience.
I already raised my little brother for the 10 years he's been alive. Don't need my own kids lol.
Alright. What about people who have never had a 'significant' relationship? Is it normal for middle aged people to have never really been in a real relationship. Or even not care if it doesnt ever happen?
It’s normal. Most people haven’t. Titles mean nothing . It’s the meaning behind the relationship
You are funny w/o trying! I can relate! I get so upset even when sister tries to pass her kids along to being my responsibility. Like No. You kept having babies. That was your choice not mine. I'll babysit sometimes but only if it doesn't inconvenience me. Lol
I really enjoyed what you had to say in this video. I hope you have better days ahead. I'm sure you will have better days ahead
Is there a way to PM on RUclips?!
Samantha B no
I hope that you get to go out and have those wonderful experiences
are they slow learners❓
+Eddie Porter who?
Mark : You can have my five rug rats if you get bored because you can at least have a tax break but you have to pay for their college education, food , clothing ,dental needs , health care costs. Having kids will definitely force you to grow up quickly for the 1st 18 years of their life.Unfortunately when they become teenagers you will have to cope with their drama.
But why is someone not considered grown up until they have kids?
+prettysteeve47 ^^
+prettysteeve47 What an easy privileged life you must have led to have the luxury of unnecessarily forcing THAT kind of burden upon yourself.
Oh wow. I can't help but be attacked for my choice of not having kids. How about you stick to your sad ol life and leave our lives to ourselves.
Yep kids can be expensive 😆😂🙃
not 95%, its 77%
What is?
@@TheMarkGoudy % of people who want children.
@@urbana11229 Where are you getting that statistic? Mine wasn't meant to be literal but it is based on my own experience.
Call an Uber for a kid???
Wow. mil·len·nial!!!!
Thankfully you are not.
What?
Did you never sit in a taxi before you turned 18? 😂
Well, it looks like antinatalism can be wrong if there is an alternative if life sucks.
What if you can exit anytime?
I think that antinatalists are fighting for the wrong cause, let me explain why:
Imagine
that there is a right to exit for free anytime anywhere for anyone no
matter age or health condition and this is acceptable by society as
norm, will there still be a problem to procreate ?
So I think that you are fighting for the wrong cause.
All of you should fight for the right to exit for anyone anywhere anytime for free with free cremation.
Lol bro what?
@@TheMarkGoudy Well. let me educate you: Not wanting kids is seen negative by society, especially in "US and A". You can have a bunch of kids, but with the condition that they have the right to exit anytime anywhere, for free, painless, assisted for free by doctors, free cremation and other things for free in this process of exiting life, Will procreation still be a problem for you?
I see lot's of people these day fighting for the wrong reasons: childfree, antinatalists, efilists, atheists.
All these problems can be solved by giving people the right to exit anytime anywhere in the world.
@@TheMarkGoudy There will always be people forcing someone into existence, so in the end there will be two types of people:
1) who want to exist till they change their mind, when they get ill or older;
2) who does not want to exist;
Not all people think they are forced into existence, that's the problem.
I'm not antinatalist. I'm not fighting and I don't have a cause. I've made a decision about what I want to do and I gave my reasons. Nothing in this video tells anyone else what THEY should do. I don't think that having kids is morally wrong, it's just not what I want.
I support the right to assisted suicide but there's more that you haven't considered. What about how their "right to exit" affects others? Who is going to pay for free cremation and why is that the only option?
@@usalawlemon I don't think you listened to my reasoning in the video. Just because the kids could kill themselves at any time, that doesn't address the reasons I gave.
CAN RELATE!
Hey mark I totally understand your reasons for not wanting children. But for some reason i know you would be a great father based on what you been through.
Your very mature !
Have you ever wanted kids?
No
you are just missing the best experience of all, moments that cant be valuable, so mmm... things that really matter cost, you know. And the sacrifice really matters. have a good life :)
Not having kids is the best experience of all. You do you
Having children is a choice and you shouldn't be judged by it. I know i might be too young to choose that i don't want kids (i'm almost 15) but I think parenthood is a very hard task to do and you need patiece, will and love especialy for mothers since they do a lot of work, not saying that dads don't have to hard work to rise their children