AUTISM In Girls: KNOW These SYMPTOMS (2018)
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- Опубликовано: 31 май 2024
- Autism in girls can show differently, this video shows how to identify girls with Autism. Know these symptoms**** How do women and girls experience autism? ➡ www.autism.org.uk/womensday
AUTISM Characteristics ➡ bit.ly/2pnE2ua
Autism and Girls ➡ www.scientificamerican.com/ar...
The women with autism but don’t know it ➡ theconversation.com/the-women-...
Female Autism ➡ www.highspeedtraining.co.uk/h...
Females with Aspergers Syndrome ➡ bit.ly/2HxRrGJ
(video) Facts About Girls with Autism ➡ • AUTISM in GIRLS - Fact...
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About This Video
In this video Dan Jones from The Aspire World talks about autism in girls, female autism and women with autism. Girls and aspergers syndrome and girls with autism have an interesting history, and it is sometimes hard to spot autism symptoms in girls. Autism in females has a different set of symptoms. Autism in girls Know these symptoms to know girls and autism / girls with aspergers syndrome, and signs of autism in girls.
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The Aspie World very accurate!
Nice thx for the info
Hey, Dan, the majority of ones I know with Aspergers Syndrome are boys. I don't know any girl with Aspergers Syndrome. I don't see how Aspergers Syndrome effects more boys than girls, it's very strange to me.
I think you were completely accurate with this video! I’m a girl with autism, and I was diagnosed very late (just last year) and I’m 17, almost 18 now. However after my mom learned more about autism, she realized that I had been displaying symptoms all along, and they had just written off the symptoms as some weird quirks and just being really shy. All the symptoms you talked about, I exhibit, especially the over talking about one thing even though I’m very passionate about it. (mine is specifically movies, and I annoy my parents almost all the time), people just assuming that I was quiet, and having other people talk for me. I still do the last one, especially when I order food at a restaurant, I make my parents order for me, and even if I do say something I look anywhere but at the waiter.
Hi Dan! I just wanted to say that the ratio 4:1 is not necessarily true, because if you think about it, girls hiding the symptoms more lead to late, misdiagnosis, or no diagnosis at all. This means a large portion of girls are not counted in the ratio, therefore it is untrue. This is just my theory from personal experience, but i believe it holds some truth.
I wonder how many females go through life with a type autism and never get diagnosed
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I'm just wondering if there's any reason to get the diagnosis? I turned 30 last summer and this is 100% my life
I'm 51. I had some things happen that made me wonder. I will talk to my doctor a week from today.
I am 51. Never diagnosed. Does this mean it's not real?
i have all this traits but idk f it's kist social anxiety only or social anxiety+ autism
Sadly, for older girls, if they're quiet they may be perceived as snobby. This can exacerbate the social anxiety they already feel. :(
People have told me that when they first met me they thought I looked "scary". Mind you I'm 5 feet tall xD I guess I have a severe resting bitch face on top of never talking...people just think I'm furious all the time - which isn't too far from the truth either :P
I have generalized anxiety, crowd anxiety and autism. Life is hard since my parents yell at md for my problems I don't tell them about them. I am 19 and got told by my doctor recently that I'm autistic but choose not to tell my parents because I don't want my anxiety attacks to come one due to yelling
Grace Dixon - You really should tell your parents. It might be easier to talk to one parent, if you feel overwhelmed by sharing in a group and let them pass the info to the other parent. Try to calmly let them know what your doctor said. Don't blame them for past frustrations, since they probably didn't know. Just try to help them to understand and I'm sure they will become your biggest allies.
Also, you're welcome to message me if you need a friend. :)
@@marshmallowweekly8575 -
tried and got yelled at for faking as they called it@@primabellas6856
I wonder how many people think: "I'm just awkward, or socially inept, or an introvert, or just a bad person for not caring about socializing," when really they are on the spectrum.
I'm undiagnosed, but a lot of these points hit home for me.
The quote is me everyday
Same I'm not diagnosed but I experience a lot of those points
This was me..
I am an introvert, but after getting an ADHD diagnosis at 19, and the psychologist saying that it's likely that I am on the spectrum (without making me pay $1000 for additional testing), I was able to find videos like this, and HowToADHD that explain a lot about me. I feel less awkward and broken now that I know I'm not just a weirdo.
Raine Ashyr I’ve always found I try to be a social butterfly, but in Primary, the girls I hung out with thought I was annoying, a crybaby and expendable
1. Relying on other people to talk for them
2. Having a passionate specific interest
3. May restrict the topic of conversation that they initiate to their specific interest
4. Anxiety
5. Shy & quiet
6. Become less interactive and social with age
Oh god, less social? I already have no friends.
This describes 90% of my personality
This is lit 80% me
Less social!? Well there's no hope for me then 😬
Woah this is actually so true 😯
I'm the queen of workarounds. Sending an email in stead of calling, asking someone else to talk for me, reading a book so people don't talk to me, pretending I don't see someone on the street, etc. One time my boyfriend decided that if I didn't call the pizza place there would be no pizza, so we ate lunch at 5pm, because it took me 3 hours to finally be able to call. He never tried that again.
lmao that's so me. I have very bad eating habbits because of this. I don't like cooking in the first place and I live alone and cooking for one is just terrible. I'm always left with leftovers* which I hate. I hate the taste of it and I hate handling cold food. I always have to ask my mom to clean food that has gone bad from my fridge. That's why I often just get delivery. And because I just hate calling I usually have lunch at like 7pm.
Goele Deckers I do that as well. I never understood why I had such issues with it.
Me too!
Lol i can relate
@Julie Hodson I am not officially diagnosed either (when I went to see a therapist about anxiety issues she said there is no doubt I'm autistic, though, but I never felt the need to go through the diagnosing process). I have the same thing when meeting people on the street, not knowing what to do, looking around and just looking at the last moment to say hi (or bye, I'm still confused about that too). And I also have light prosopagnosia, it's very difficult for me to recognise faces, I mostly recognise hair and clothing style or the place I usually meet them. Once I met my neighbour in a bank and he said hi and I thought that was very creepy, because I had no idea who he was until I got home and associated the clothes of the man who had said hi with crossing my neighbour in the hallway. Mostly I don't care how people feel about me, but when things like this happen I feel kind of embarrassed.
Being social is hard. After hello how are you and maybe mentioning the weather, then what to talk about....
I don’t even get that far haha! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
The setting gives you something in common, if you're in school, you can talk about that, if you're in the bus stop, mention the bus schedule or sth like that. It won't always result in a good conversation, but it's something to try. Also don't forget to ask questions to keep the conversation going. Like 80% of my conversations are questions and smiles :D At least keeps it going for a bit so I don't look rude.
That's what I'm saying!!!! I try to tell my sister this and she doesn't get how hard it is for me!
To seem neurotypical you have to talk when they are silent to not talk out of context and give subjective opinions which aren't too much radical and don't ever talk about what have been demonstrated by science. It's not enough to have interest in a lot of matters to have many things to talk about. You have to believe in magical medecine and esoteric thinking or anything or try to not show your opinion to avoid anybody pointing at you for your lack of social connection.
I am so bad with social chit chat
I was told I won't be diagnosed unless the symptoms crippled my life and that I couldn't function. The mental health care system in the country is amazing.
Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
BlackRibbonTV I literally got this response too when I tried to get diagnosed 😤 it’s crazy cus why would you change the name to calling it an autism *spectrum* disorder if you’re willingly going to exclude certain people on the spectrum?? It’s so medically regressive
@@Androgynary I'd laugh if it wasn't so sad. Our mental health system lacks what can only be another path to mental health.
I was super lucky that I went to a woman who specialized in Autism. I was technically diagnosed twice: once when I was around 2, and again at 16.
@sassymatazzy Just a heads-up: this comment is long.
"What's the benefit of being labeled with a mental health disorder if you're symptoms are not life crippling?"
I don't know, maybe catching the condition in time so one can learn good strategies for dealing with certain problems and knowing how one works for sure instead of not having support until you crash down hard (and possibly takes your life along)? Otherwise, what's the point of diagnosing early in the first place? Are we really just gonna wait for someone to crash down to lend a hand? Aren't we looking to avoid that in the first place?
"You can still get therapy without the label."
But you won't know if your problems are really autism, and you need to be sure in order to know exactly what steps to take (e.g. while both PTSD and ASD present sensory overload and oversensitivity to stimuli, PTSD is due to hypervigilance while in autism it's neuronal in nature. So, for a person with PTSD, you'd like to use primarily CBT for the anxiety and hypervigilance alongside dealing with their past trauma, but with autism you offer stim toys, breathing exercises and changes in their environment like a sensory room or noisecancelling headphones). Also, certain services or help need that you be diagnosed.
"You can still heal and learn how to cope with your symptoms through RUclips channels like this one, or from websites and books."
But it's not sure. You don't know if it is or if it isn't since one is no expert. Also, others wouldn't take your needs seriously (it's not just you filling these needs and done, no problems; sometimes your environment needs to know how you work too, e.g. accomodations in college or work). And one doesn't "heal", as in you don't become neurotypical. You are still autistic. The only difference would be if you get support or not, and that's only made with a diagnosis. Appearing fine on the outside doesn't discount hidden struggles.
"Would being diagnosed make you feel more like you're part of a community? You can also get that feeling without being diagnosed."
Wrong, because autistics are only 1% of the population. Most of the environment is populated by people who do not have this set of struggles, strengths and traits, and won't understand them no matter how much you explain. It's very isolating. Most people won't understand you have genuine challenges for eating at the designated hour, for example. Or for taking a bath (due to sensory issues). Or for understanding certain manners of speech. Or for talking when overwhelmed. They instead think you're lazy, incompetent, rebel, rude, arrogant, etc.
And these labels are placed on undiagnosed autistics for great part of their childhood and adolescence by unknowing neurotypicals (parents, friends, teachers, etc). And one, not knowing about autism or even thinking about it, swallows the entire pill and think we're defective since everyone else says so. This erodes a kid's self-steem, y'know? Perfect recipe for depression.
The diagnosis sheds a light on our being: on how we work. It says: I'm not broken, I'm not being mean and lazy; I have legitimate struggles. My experience is valid, and there are others like me.
This is why getting a diagnosis is important: to understand oneself, to legitimize our struggles, to recognize one's nature (ourselves or others), to access services if there's something that really hinders someone. One is autistic for life. Best to know that's what we're dealing with so we can use good strategies, instead of having the constant doubt of being wrong because we looked up symptoms on the internet. Hope this clears your confusion.
If I'm being honest, I think I might have autism but I feel like if I tell someone they'll say "you just have a bit of anxiety"
silki sushi Same kinda
I have a lot of symptoms of both male and female aspergers (I' m female) And I feel like its getting worse (I'm 17) my mom noticed and she took me to some psychologist who specialises in problem youth (teenagers who don't go to school, take drugs etc...) She said theres nothing wrong with me after one visit. After that I found out that my mom didn't even considerd autism (which is weird since she is nurse that helps the doctor who does those every 2 years health checks and where you go when you catch cold or something, I don't remember how are these doctors called in english and she deals with autistic kids all the time), she just thouth I just have some problems in school or something I'd want to talk about. I don't know how should I tell her or anyone else that I think I may have aspergers
@@ada2314 You have my life to a T. Nurse mother, psychiatrist that said there was nothing wrong after one visit as a teen. No one considers Asperger's, people say it's only a little social anxiety despite it causing many meltdowns... Like, I totally understand how you feel.
The easiest way to go about it is to just say what you're thinking. Say you feel you align with many of these symptoms and would like to speak to a specialist to confirm or deny your suspicions. Now you don't need to say it so formally as me, that's just how I talk about stuff like this.
Ok, I'll try to talk to her. But I think she won't listen to me, then she'd be angry with me and for some reason I just can't take when I'm getting yelled at, I just start crying and can't argument about anything and I just feel so bad and stupid
Me too. My husband thinks I am just dr googling/ self diagnosis faking it. Whatever you call that when you think you have every sickness. Not supportive at all.
I'm actually writing a book about female autism called: The Suffering Chameleon.
Oh cool!!!
Ree Snape
Maybe you should call it the suffering starseed
That's awesome!!!
Amazing title, that's exactly how i feel. I would love to read it.
Victoria Arcturus
Cool, you also believe that we are starseeds?
there's also unintentionally stealing personality traits of people who are nice to them. this used to piss a lot of people off when i was in high school (long before i was diagnosed)
Honey Boom i used to do that in middle school and then my cousin told me "ur not acting like urself. Be urself" at first i didnt know what he meant cuz i thought i was being me. This was before me and anyone in the family knew abt my aspergers. I didnt find out until i was 16 and in foster care.
Honey Boom oh I think I’ve done that idk if I realize I do that but I feel like that makes sense.
Yes, I guess you could call this a work around. I figured out that is scares people when they figure out you are copying them. It even annoys me when I realize I am copying their body movements; sitting like they are or standing like they are. I don't even mean to do it.
Tamara Pope that's actually just ordinary human behaviour. i saw a documentary on body language once and they explained that.
A few years in another video someone said we're like 'social chameleons'. We don't naturally know or understand how to act, so we observe others all the time. When we find ourselsves in a similar situation, we mimic them hoping to get the desired response. But, when the people are there that youve mimicked and they recognise it, they get upset. Although they should really feel honoured lol :D
I'm undiagnosed but damn, I identified with everything in this.
✌🏼Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
Same
Here exactly the same. As I watched this video and the other one, I am in tears of relief to know there do exist other people like me. Espcially as a grown up woman, when you still don't understand why you feel so different than the rest of the world.
Since a few years ago I started to think I probably could have Autism as I looked back on my 'weird' life patterns. Looking it from the bright side I often make the joke, that people like me are in fact, talented actors.
Anyways, I am so thankful for our Autist fellow companions who make this kind of video's and the ones who share their comments about their experiences! This helps me really a lot, in times of feeling extremely lonely.
Same
Same here! Feel like I FINALLY found my tribe.😃🤗 SUCH a relief knowing I'm not the only one & I'm not "weird" lol!🙂
In regards to ordering pizza; pizza ordering apps have been a lifesaver!!!
Yes i will not call and order on the phone for anything !lol
I will often not even get pizza that you can't order online.
The Problem is you still have to open the door 😖
@@danamuller5016 COVID-19 helped that with contactless delivery.
Bee noneyabeezwax sameee
for me the biggest problem is people telling me I don't have it, and then being weirded out by my behavior.
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terry -o-brain it’s sort of the same for me? I’m currently going through a diagnosis or autism and I’m just searching up signs and symptoms because I’m pretty sure I don’t have it but everything I’ve looked at is literally all me. When people tell me I have it, I get anxious about my behaviour so I’m very cautious on what I do because I’m afraid in case I show it too much. I don’t know why though, I’ve got 2 brothers with autism. I guess it scares me because of the way they behave when they have tantrums. Maybe that’s how people perceive me and I don’t want to be known for being moody. I have depression and major anxiety so it doesn’t help much? Sorry if this offended you I just wanted to tell you that it’s similar for me too 😊
@@Summerooo I've been in a similar position!! Actually I'm going to a therapist tomorrow to talk about getting a diagnosis.. so I'm preparing evidence of why I think I have it. When I first realized it was a possibility (about a year and 4 months ago) it totally freaked me out. I was so paranoid about every single thing that I did. It was like my whole reality flipped and I didn't know how to handle it, and I was completely terrified, getting more and more scared the more I realized just how accurate every symptom I read was. I was also scared of people's perception of me.
An important thing to note is that a diagnosis doesn't change who you are, it just helps to describe. If you're diagnosed with aspergers it doesn't mean you're going to start acting like your brothers, and it doesn't mean people think you act like them either. You also don't have to tell anyone you don't want to. Your family will probably know, but you don't have to tell your friends or anyone else if you don't want to. In the end, just try to get used to the idea and relax. After being shocked and scared of the idea, the validation of your symptoms can be quite freeing.
Rebecca Federkins thank you ❤️ I hope everything goes well for you!
I feel your pain girl! I had severe phone anxiety few years ago, the phone ringing or a door knock triggered my panic attacks and I could not explain it to anyone. It was completely irrational, I would psych myself up just to make a phone call which is only ever to drs etc. never friends/family except my parents. I took a receptionist job where I answered the phone constantly, it was hard at first but it really helped my anxiety. It still affects me to this day but I don’t panic as much, but it depends on my stress levels and mood.
For me, my biggest traits are: Not being able to cope with disappointment (if my plan goes wrong I act like a child and people giving me alternative plans can go to hell because my entire day is already ruined),
being overly self-concious,
being extremely tired after engaging in social contact,
social anxiety,
tensing my muscles when I feel intense positive emotion,
extreme sensory issues (sometimes my boyfriend trying to cuddle me can bring me to tears because sometimes it literally hurts my skin)
and having serious problems with my emotion regulation (depression, hyperactivity, derealisation)
I can talk perfectly about my traits and emotions, but it's as if I talk about somebody else, I know tons of information but I can't seem to apply it to my own life which is really hard.
Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
@crystalballon it’s like you just described my entire life and way of being, this is the first time I really considered maybe this might be a diagnosis closer to what’s really goin on with me, and your comment made me feel less alone. Ty
This sounds like borderline.
@@Froggo7 I don't know. The sensory issues are usually not related to borderline, unless it's more than one disorder working together.
@@Froggo7 it's not. That's a very common misconception but it's extremely harmful because it overlooks major detrimental traits like sensory issues, intense social anxiety and pretty much the entire psychopathology of aspergers. Borderline can be cured and typically only appears in late teenhood. Aspergers can't be cured and is consistently present throughout your entire life. It also implies that said person with aspergers inherently has borderline personality traits which leads people to think that they lie, manipulate, are dangerous and impulsive (mostly due to stigma against borderline) when the vast majority of people with aspergers are the exact opposite. This misinterpretation is something that people with aspergers, ESPECIALLY women with aspergers face all too often and it can end up leaving them with no psychiatric treatment, their suffering diminished to attention seeking and their personality completely mischaracterized which leads to even more problems for someone with aspergers.
The way you talked about the regression with social situations and the like in autistic girls really hit me hard. Because that’s what’s kept everyone, including my only family from believing I’m autistic, is that I appeared to develop normally, and I was a fairly social child. But I started to regress around high school, and it’s gotten harder and harder for me. I needed to hear this, to have this validation. Thank you so much.
✌🏼Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
The regression is difficult. I was very social, but kept having terrible experiences with terrible people. Now, I have trouble wanting to have connections with people
@@onnie.6815I've had the same experience! I have a husband now he treats me really good and makes me laugh all the time! I found him through Facebook dating! But I've dated a lot of people and attempted to make friends with a lot of co workers and had it really hurt me. But it was all worth it to find my husband!
At this point, at age 27, I'm extremely (if not completely) hermitic and only leave my home when absolutely necessary. I have one friend that I'm comfortable around, mainly because he's on the spectrum as well and we're fortunate enough to be neighbors. I have a boyfriend whom I suspect may also be somewhere on the spectrum and we try our best to communicate effectively. I am unable to work after sustaining severe burn-out trying to take on a neurotypical person standard work-load, masking for over a year to the point where my body just gave out and I had to be hospitalized. Female ASD visibility is so important. Thank you for making this video and raising the topic. Autistic women and girls need to know that they have every right to be who they are, to claim their space and stand up for themselves and their needs. Not constantly having to cover up their struggle, constantly worrying about being exposed and overexerting and exhausting themselves trying to live up to neurotypical standards of normality.
my life has taken almost exactly the same path as yours.... it makes me feel less lonely to know others have had similar experiences.
This was beautifully put. I couldnt have said it better mysrlf honestly. That neurotypical workload is horrible- god forbid you get somone who is a workaholic and cant understand y you dont want to work
the last one hurt cause i've noticed it in myself. i'm getting progressively worse in my moods, my attitude, my anger issues and anxiety fits. the thought of having to find a job that requires talking to strangers (the only one currently available for me) is paralyzing. and evaluation for autism is not only expensive, but i fear that after spending that money i will be sent away because "i'm not autistic enough"
My daughter is like u. As her mom I just want her to be "ok" ppl around her call her crazy, evil or whatever and it pisses me off.
I've noticed it in myself too and it scares me so much, I have mood swings like hell, I always have but more and more intense, I've also always had a temper but I used to feel like I had at least SOME control of it. Sometimes because of things that are either stupid or legit, I'll cry and cry and fear hits like a punch to the stomach and I can't control it people think that I can but I CAN'T. I've never had anxiety but I fear getting that aswell. I try, I really try to talk to people, but I've always been shy and quiet and it makes me feel so so horrible when I just don't want to be around people, even my mom. I've never thought about having autism before but I'm afraid, because I can relate to almost every one of the symptoms, I might have it. I've always been going from hobby to hobby and interest to interest but when I get an interest I'll have a huge obsession to it for a few months until I move on to something else. I've always feared fireworks because they were so loud and big and scared me and I've always been a picky eater, people think I'm weird. I finally think the puzzle pieces have clicked and I fear what will happen to me if this progresses, I'm afraid of it and afraid of what I might become
"They become obsessed with a book series or tv show..." **looks around at merch** Well... _-shit.-_
😂✌🏼
I feel personally attacked by this comment LMAO! this is me with
Inuyasha 🤣
I had to laugh at this one because it's so true XD
*looks at my star trek coaster then at my dalek teacup* yeah... uh.. just um.. yeah
Me and my 75 amiibo figures feel called out...
My boyfriend does not understand my Aspergers and will still force me to call for the pizza and call his friends to let them know something. It gives me extreme anxiety and I'm never left thinking that it wasn't so bad, but instead I'm "traumatized" and will just fear it more and more every time
Sounds like you need to talk to him about it. Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
People will often think that fear will go away once you face it.
Yes, exposure is the most effective way to treat phobias. However, it's something you need to build up.
In high school we had to do a lot of presentations, so that it would become easier. Instead, it just made me freak out more and more.
However, on a personal level I managed to (temporarily) beat a lot of anxieties. I tried doing the things I was afraid to do in small steps. I would do it when I had a strange confidence boost, or when certain conditions made it easier (e.g. talking to a stranger in a concert queue, the only place on earth where I feel like I fit in).
People who don't have similar fears themselves often won't understand how big and real it is for you. Even if you try to explain, they will often brush it off. Only if you can connect it to something that's fearful for them they might understand the way it feels, but even then a lot of people can't seem to apply it to something "abnormal". Luckily there are enough people who understand too!
I hope you can find a way to explain it to him, you deserve to be respected for the entire you.
My husband does the same... for me however, it has gotten better. Not the initial part where my anxiety goes through the roof, but I am capable of making the call and having done so multiple times, I now know what to say because I've repeated it so many times - hence making it a little bit easier each time.
He's helping you That's why
AJ The RPG gamer as I said. It’s not helping me. It’s making my anxiety worse
Actually, the last point kinda surprised me. I've been wondering for a long time whether I could have Asperger's but I remember being more outgoing and social when I was younger. I had no problems with meeting people and having new friends up until middle school and after that everything changed. I always used this excuse to myself like "I can't be on the spectrum cause during childhood I wasn't like this as much". But hearing that this regression is fairly common makes so much sense! I've always been presenting other symptoms, this was the only thing that didn't add up basically.
Oh interesting! Thank you so much for the comment and input! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
My 2 daughters were mostly 'fine ' until transitioning to high school. Then bam,like someone flicked a switch.
anxiety ...worst symptom in girls
Yeah it is not good at all 😩.
NV.Starlight Chihuahuas #worldbenzoday
Social anxiety at its finest. I only catch it before I go out or feel pressured to talk to people who Idk, due to trust issues.
@@ansnfbsknanssshshbsnsndnd5438 Right? You wouldn't believe how many disorders I am diagnosed with ever since I was in elementary school, all because my psychiatrist doesn't believe Aspergers can affect females.
Then when we get old, we find people aren't worth it and we burn bridges and live alone or with one person we trust.
Sky Marie so true :D
Sky Marie or none...
The only one you can trust is yourself.
Yesss
Yes!
I couldn't easily trust because so many of my friends would talk behind everyone's back, so I didn't understand or trust, as they would obviously do it to me too!
Bridges are such a security risk. :)
I was never professionally diagnosed, but everything I’ve read or heard about autism has got me convinced that I’m somewhere on the spectrum. It really is hard for people to see autism in females because even we don’t believe we have it until we start really looking into it, and even then we’re in denial.
I intend to get a diagnosis as soon as I can, just to be sure.
I just realized I may have it to fam, it explains so much and why I act the way I do.
Same here :)
Internet List - 50 Positives of Having Asperger's - might be helpful 🦋🌿
1. Relying on other people to talk for them
2. Having a passionate specific interest (movie series, tv show, book series)
3. Resticting the topic of conversation to their specific field of interest
4. Anxiety
5. As children, the parents describe them as a shy, quiet person
6. The girl becomes less and less social, more anxious, etc
@@LolaCrazy2221 I'm not russian in the slightest :D
Looks like I have autism 👊😔
I was never shy and quiet- in fact I was hyperverbal and didn't know when to stop talking. If I couldn't say what was going through my head I would go absolutely crazy. I wasn't very good with social situations even though I was always loud and chatty, however as I have grown older I hate social interaction even more since I am more aware about certain rules that exist. I am more reserved now. I find that autistic people who are hyperverbal can be overlooked at times, not all of us are shy and quiet.
Stereotypes makes it difficult to notice. Mostly because girls are "quieter" and "more emotional", thus people don't get diagnosed until later in life. Also, girls are more forced into training how to interact with others due to how girls interact with each other as children.
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People just won't tolerate behavior from girls that they'll accept from boys. It's wild.
I'm very quiet and very emotional.
I definitely relate to the social regression as I aged. It became increasingly difficult for me to keep up with mimicking to fit in causing unmanageable anxiety. The only way I could relieve the anxiety was to withdraw from the "character" required to blend in. Once I became myself I was no longer socially "typical" and isolation became comforting.
Hydro Fire - officially diagnosed with ADHD a few years ago but I feel certain I’m more aspie and have never looked into diagnosis- women my age were completely overlooked for things like this. I was shy but social in K-4th or so, but by 7th grade had completely shut down and would read books in hallways to avoid eye contact even. It’s highly likely that nobody even heard me speak in HS. Teachers would call on me and I’d shake my head and stare at desk and refuse to answer. PE and lunch we’re particularly painful as I was forced to partner up or interact. I think it’s because we are expected to be social and girls tend to be more social but as we get older the obsessive facts and ignoring of social queues gets us noticed and in my experience teased. They would say things right to my face about how weird I was, and I’d start panicking that if they said it to be directly then what were they saying behind my back. At that point there was no trust and everyone was an enemy. Even at 39 now I find social interactions hard at work and while I cope by plastering on a smile and have canned responses - I still feel dread and panic and don’t really initiate or know how to exit the conversation
I'm 24 and I find it too hard to "fit in" so I don't
I absolutely relate.
Before watching this video, despite being diagnosed at eight: *I do **_not_** have autism.*
Five minutes in: *Are you kidding me? I feel personally called out right now.*
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I'm a woman diagnosed with ASD and I relate to this so much! I always make people do things for me. When I have movie night with my friends, we always order food. I just order it online, and let one of my friends open the door because I just can't...
I also have an obsession with cats. I know everything about cats, and I collect everything cat related. I even have cat curtains hanging in every room from my house.
And I'm extremely shy. To a point where I just "ignore" people who talk to me. I even ran away crying one time when a stranger asked me for directions. LOL
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I love cats too!
Nailed it, except for number 3, I won't talk about what I'm interested in, unless the other person expresses the same interest in the subject and they would have to bring it up cuz I won't. But everything I think is really spot on with me🤔
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Same, I NEVER initiate conversation, and I definitely do not small talk.
Yeah, girls might cover their passion as part of masking. They might know that it wouldn't be socially acceptable to rant about it if the other person hasn't shown interest.
@@Evija3000 exactly I don't wanna come off even more weird then I already know I do😳
Yes, I prefer to keep my interests hidden. Expect insects. Insects are wonderful 🐞
I have such a hard time looking people in the eye. It actually really bothers me
Yes I can totally agree.
Me too...and sometimes I encounter people who are obsessed with making eye contact to the point that they get angry if I look away or return to the task I was trying to accomplish while they ramble on and on about things that are generally totally irrelevant to me.
how can you talk and make eye contact at the same time 😣
@@rachelromberger4760 I also think it may be a sexual thing for neurotypicals...if I force myself to smile and make eye contact with them they get grabbier and want to talk about "feelings" and "intimacy" and make inappropriate comments about my physical appearance and get offended if I pull away from them and tell them to stop doing it. It really annoys me.
my boyfriend and I used to fight about that but then he learned to accept the fact that I'm just unable to process the info coming out of his mouth while looking at is eyes. It took him a while but he gets it now.
Hi, I'm a 33-year-old female on the spectrum. I've been thinking about the practical side of these issues for a while now. I'm starting to suspect that the social anxiety actually has a lot to do with language fluency. I hate talking on the phone because the pacing requires me to take in information and rapidly form a response. When I'm talking on the phone I tend to have awkward silences and overlap the other person a lot, and this causes me to feel anxious about talking on the phone. Texting or emailing allows me to set the pace and formulate responses at a slower rate. I don't know, it's just a thought.
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Omg I don’t think I have social anxiety but literally same I am terrible at talking (unless it’s jokes sort of) but I love to write
Language fluency! Thank you! I've been looking for a term so I can explain to my mum why Im not intentionally withdrawing, i have terrible language fluency because of my aspergers. She knows I have aspergers but doesnt quite get the language fluency flaws
Same here! Sometimes I actually feel there is some sort of impairment and not just due to anxiety. I mess up even when I'm talking to a sibling with no one else around. I've had this problem as a kid.
Can Female with Autism have a child with no autism ?
I miss the sensory overload thing. Apparently, this occurs more often and more expressed in female autists (females with autism spectrum) than males. Specially sound. Visible from the outside (not autside) if she seems to overreact to a smashing vase. Or is tired an irritated after a visit to a noisy pub. Or just shuts down. Or hates you when you did not brush your teeth. Or if you used after shave (copiously). Also, Apparently tics (repetitive movements) are less present in females on the spectrum than in males. Also stuff like brah's, tights and other nasty contraptions may feel to invasive on her skin. (Brah's without a hoop or itchy lace but just elastic might be better). She may not like being touched by just anyone (as her partner: try a short shoulder massage and ask her before you touch).
Oh interesting I put there. Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
All of this is true. When I first had to wear a bra I would cry a lot and be really angry all the time. I used to smash windows and hit my sister for talking while I was dealing with the anguish of having an uncomfortable tag on my singlet when I was a young child
Oooh.. i totally get this.. for the longest time i felt i have no stims but i realise i have always been careful about not letting anyone see them including my family.. as i already feel like i don't belong. (Not because i had delusions that i am adopted) but i just felt odd.. and i knew that because my family spends more time with me they know i am odd even if other ppl just think i am shy and polite. I realised recently though that even though i almost never stim now i haven't been able to let go pf my love for spft fabrics and my annoyance at an embroidered or shiny fabric bedsheet being on the bed as opposed to the spftest cotton to i can keep rubbing it. I still do it when i am alone along with a few other stims. Including when i find my bra, or the stitching in my tshirts annoying. I do it alone coz at one point i did it enough that my parents took me to a psychologist.
Literature. When i was teenager i preferred to stay at home reading books than going to parties, plus i can't stand too much noise.
Yeah!!!
Yeah, I used to spend literally the whole 2 weeks of school holidays in my room reading and only coming out for food and the occasional shower
Same I did the party thing, it was never fitted for me. I also had my video games and movies my friends didn't understand.
Omg as a kid I could not stop reading...unless it was a boring textbook...unless I got distracted with a different chapter than what we were studying.
When I was in school I used to hide in the library during recess and write my own stories or read books. Then when I was a teenager I left high-school and I home-schooled myself. I hated the constant noise and social obligations.
My boyfriend always gets annoyed with me if he has to ask a store employee for something for me. But in my life I have practiced and perfected my puppy eyes for situations like these. So he can't resist, poor guy.
Ah, it can be difficult.
The last pizza slice I hate asking people stuff... I am just shy... no other symptoms
I used to make siblings or friends ask sales people for help etc. now I usually make my kids do it - I can and will if I have to, but it’s something I avoid whenever possible.
I have no problem at all approaching strangers and asking them something. Knowing it's highly unlikely I'll ever see them again, removes my anxiety. I just wish it worked on the phone (which I don't use).
I always have to ask other people to ask about things for me. I can ask people directly, but it makes me so anxious that i usually will get someone else to run just give up. Recently I was able to muster up the courage to go to the sandwich area in my schools cafeteria and tell the person what I water instead of getting pre made food. My friends laughed it off but it felt like a big accomplishment for me
Me: why the heck is this on my recommended list?
Also me: has autism, dyspraxia, anxiety and depression.
The "specific interest" category for me is a bit more broad, you could say. I want to know the 'why &how' to nearly everything I come in contact with . Some people confuse me with a knowitall... I'm just genuinely curious
This used to cause me so much trouble as a kid. Even teachers couldn't stand me asking all the questions... It's made me really self-conscious so now as and adult I just try to keep it all in and not talk about how stuff works to anyone. It's hard knowing I can't ever relax and just be myself around other people, but at least nowadays I can google up just about anything.
@@Xtalllll this has been my only worry about getting diagnosed, i feel the exact same , but worry that I need to have some sort of specific special interest. but with depression, ptsd, n bad parents, its like, i dont rly talk or show interest in much things so idkkkk
@@julialennjastorch2630 most people don't know the "why"/"what if" answers and silencing those with questions is their way of securing their own anxiety .
Not everyone sees the potential of thought & most find thinking in itself to be an anxious task. Others like us, find it comforting to discover new things/reasons for things .
I was called a "know it all" numerous times. I like learning how things work also.
@@Catlily5 even though I'm no saint, people still often confuse me for a kiss-up because I tend to religiously (sometimes obsessively) follow the phrase "If you're going to do something, do it the Right way. " Cutting corners isn't comfortably a part of my vocabulary or lifestyle. All or nothing sort of mentality.
As a person who was raised female, the biggest problem is that we get overlooked. Having an obsession with makeup isn't seen as a specific enough interest, regardless of how extensive the interest might be. If we do not communicate well, we're just sweet quiet girls or we're told to go do it anyway. In a way, we're not 'allowed' to be autistic, in that most symptoms we display will get shut down or we'll be reprimanded.
Sylien I can relate so much!!! Totally agree with the makeup one.
I can totally relate. I not only have an obsession with makeup, but movies as well, and it’s not considered a “weird” enough interest for people to notice just how obsessive I am about it. Most people just assume I’m a film buff or something, but it’s literally the only thing I talk about
Cassidy Pitts it feels good to know your not alone with those obsessions, I LOVE greys anatomy hehe but I feel odd talking about some other show or whatever. Do you collect movies, or do you just watch? I’m weird, I like taking notes and making edits to post on Instagram.
Nooby Cuber right now I mainly watch them, but I would love to collect them! I agree, it feels kinda weird to talk about something other than what I know, and I swear I actively try to avoid talking about movies in public, but once I get into talking about it, it’s hard to get me to shut up. haha
Sylien so agree, my obsession was imence to the point I would shop lift every shade and hue of lipstick and nail colour. I would arrange said cosmetics in lines on my dressing table as a teenager, later I chopped all of the lipsticks and melted them down into one weird colour, the melted mixture landed on a finger causing a painful blister, it was the first thing I thought of when it dawned on me that I may be on the spectrum a few months ago, I'm still angry that no body noticed somthing,
People are all too eager to diagnose women with other emotional problems or tell them it's all in their head.
This is not exclusive to autism or any other personality disorder - this is the way it has always been, ever since "hysteria" was considered a catch-all for problems that women have suffered from.
Women are more readily dismissed in regards to all health problems - even physical ailments are blamed on them overreacting or it being "in their head" and they are readily dismissed.
"even physical ailments are blamed on them overreacting or it being "in their head""
kind of sounds like anxiety, simply dismissing people isn't really gonna do much though
My mum says it's all in your head so much I'm slowly starting to believe it, on one level she is right.
People are VERY quick to just say women have any kind of emotional problem and brush them off, you’re right. That makes it very difficult
That's like saying pneumonia is not real because it's all in your lungs.
I went to my doctor to explain to him that I had been having panic attacks for 2 years, and that I think I had depression or anxiety. I came in his office shaking a crying. I know it stems from the trauma I dealt with growing up, and being home from college triggers that. I gave him a five minute run down of my story, and he said that I looked like a smart girl with a bright future, and that he wasn't going to prescribe me medication which I didn't ask for, or diagnose me because it would go on my record forever. He said things will get better essentially, and sent me on my way with a 75$ bill. All this after listening to me speak through tears and hyperventilating for less than 5 minutes. Still don't have a diagnosis, and am trying to get by.
Obsession was my main thing. I obsessed over everything, still do. It is great. I'm weird because I can easily talk to anyone about anything. I'm just very weird.
Lets talk about insects?
Jensan Ruby i like bees, they’re adorable.
That's awesome. They also pollinate and help crops. What type of bee is your favorite?
I like (and hate) mosquitoes, because they remind me of rats. They transmit insane amount of disease, aka the deadliest animals in the world, and some species were able to spread around by hiding inside used car tires and getting a ride to anywhere.
I'm thinking of getting seen for a diagnosis for Asperger's. I am 20 I grew up in a bubble or that's how I see it. I live in the middle of nowhere so I kind of attributed these traits to that.
Basically I have been seen by everyone as shy, innocent and quiet for my whole life. I've been obsessed with learning everything I possibly can for as long as I can remember. I never fit in or understood how to but I got by on the guise of being cute which seemed to make my silence acceptable.
I have moments where words get caught in my throat and no matter how hard I try I can't speak. Phone calls scare me unless I write a script I can't make them.
I like to think very deeply about everything I am constantly analyzing everything. I used to accidentally insult people when trying to help them by pointing out stuff. I have never understood why people laugh at others pain. I have panic attacks and I can still cry when not getting my way (which I hate I don't like it because people give me loads of attention and it freaks me out)
If a friend tells me an interest of theirs I will look it up obsessively and then try to talk to them in extreme detail about it. People not liking me is scary because I don't know how to process that.
My mom said I was late to talk but once I started talking I never shut up. I taught myself a lot before going to school and as a little kid going to school was my dream.
I always have felt like I'm weird like there's something off. I have read avidly from a very young age. I can name a lot more things as well that make me think I have Asperger's. I guess I'll have to wait and see what my therapist says.
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It's difficult to get a proper diagnosis as a female in the US. Even more frustrating when your interest/s are things like human behavoir.
Roger Smith good luck. I know it is really difficult to get anyone to hear you out when you're so obsessed with human behavior that you can accurately predict people's reactions. Although i do personally have a difficult time with "reading people" when its directed toward me...be it good or bad. Perfect example would romantic interest. I can pick up on it pretty quickly when someone is romanticly interested in a friend or someone else in the room. But any time someone has ever been like that toward me...i have missed it completely. So maybe if you can come up with examples like that it would help you? Idk.
Roger Smith i do have anxiety but have found this issue to still be true even when 100% anxiety free situation. My only guess is that when it's directed at me half the picture is lost. When i watch tv and movies for me it's fairly similar to life in that I'm not really part of what's going on. Just off to the side watching it all go down.
Lily R I'm precisely the same way! Human behavior and psychology are my special interests, so it was difficult to get the psychologist I saw for diagnosis to take me seriously when I can do things like interpret non-verbal cues correctly or predict others' behavior. But it's just as you say, when the behavior is related to me, I miss it entirely. I can't tell when I'm being bullied or flirted with, but I can pick it up immediately when it's directed toward someone else.
Psychology and theories of human behaviour are my special interest too! I'm glad I'm not the only one! Mine started with a drive to be able to predict social situations in order to cope with them better and excitement that there are patterns in the apparent chaos that everyone else sees. Was that the same for you guys?
I really wish you all the best seeking your diagnosis Roger!
That's exactly what I do. I am majoring in psychology for that reason. I felt the psychologist were getting it wrong. If I could understand their logic then I could hide amongst them, maybe, even be able to be an influence them.
He pretty much summed up my life.
I’ve been in and out of therapy since my teenage years and none of my therapists or doctors ever mentioned autism.
I had the same issue, I had multiple psychologists for anxiety etc. none of them picked up on my ADHD or autism. Best thing is to go to your GP or family dr and ask for a psychiatrist referral for a full diagnosis. Initial appointment and diagnosis is usually super expensive here in Australia its over $500 before rebate, but follow ups are much cheaper and depending on your diagnosis you might not need regular visits like I do. Its totally worth it to get a proper diagnosis.
Because in fact many of them are useless. Even the most famous in the matter. I think 50% of the ASD diagnosis of my psychologist were wrong. I know I have it for sure since I even didn't know that ASD exist. I have all traits but he had some doubts at the begining while other patients of him are schizoid or avoiding personality. And I even met hostile patients from the organization who in fact have BPD. It was very clear everytime I've met other autistic people. Those irresponsible diagnosis makes very difficult for the society to understand what ASD is about. We need tangible diagnosis to avoid stigmatization of ASD.
Jimi x And to avoid years of unneeded frustration and confusion about our identity. In today’s society identity is everything, without knowing who we really are makes every aspect of life difficult and confusing.
@@kerryanne7126 I know my identity but we have to fight for our rights in front of this giant ignorance of society. I convinced the teachers of my university to offer different conditions for the autistic students. But I know a guy from the organization (with wrong diagnosis) who is in the same university and he is against to offer any help to the autistic students. And organizations of ASD in my country are doing nothing for our recognition in society. I know the ex-president of the ASD organization of my country and she left it as it was a nightmare and most problems came from the ignorance of the families and the national institutions. We are the last priority in my country. My brother who have BPD doesn't even believe in the existence of the ASD!
Jimi x Yeah see I don’t have high expectations for the rest of society. I don’t expect everyone to bend over backwards to accept us, they wouldn’t do it for their own ‘kind’ let alone those who are different. My uni has disability services so I just use them, no dramas there and if there is I would just take it to the staff and then higher up to vice chancellor if needed. I’ve never dealt with ASD organisations as I wasn’t diagnosed till adulthood and have never contacted them. Where I am most organisations are very accepting as discrimination is against the law, as for individuals and families its always going to be problematic. My family don’t fully understand it or believe it yet 2 of us are officially diagnosed and the rest are most likely undiagnosed autistic. I’ve personally never met any other high functioning ASD people so obviously its not hugely common where I am so its understandable that people don’t believe it; they think you have to be mute, completely non-social to have ASD. Which as we know isn’t always the case.
I’m starting to believe I may be on the spectrum. I actually stay inside all the time and still make friends order for me at restaurants. I would thing it’s just social anxiety but I also feel like mentally I’m kinda stuck being a kiddo.
Yes it could be deeper than just anxiety!
My little sister is autistic, she has gotten better but loud noises would send her into a panic attack pretty much, she had speech problems so I would have to talk for her. She is very smart though, she is really good at art and math.
I’m a 15 year old female and I know for a fact that I’m on the spectrum. I can’t even begin to explain how frustrating it is to not have anyone take you seriously when you ask for a diagnosis. I’ve mentioned it to my parents before but they were so dismissive about it, as if it wasn’t even possible, and now I’m too nervous to talk to them about it, or anyone really.
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The same way with my mother and my psychiatrist. I'm too nervous to even bring it up to anyone again, but this is becoming a more serious and obvious problem ever since I got into college because now I have to be independent and I'm failing terribly.
I'm sorry :( this has to change. didn't get my autism diagnosis until I had a complete breakdown in my early twenties. I know it is very frustrating.
I'm late to finding this, but as someone still not getting taken seriously at 42 & drawn to what you wrote, I would suggest treating yourself as if you believe you & practicing not falling into the habit of creating an abusive relationship with yourself. Been there, done that & do not recommend. The world makes it an easy route to go.
We don't need anyone's permission to accept ourselves for who we are & if someone would rather you go on a shame & self-hatred spiral then maybe they need some care & respite too because we deserve a chance to thrive.
Denial of my reality slays me when people would rather discount me than offer an ounce of consideration & yet often have challenging personalities of their own.
I hope you learn to embrace & love yourself for who you are. I hope I figure it out too. Acceptance is a hard lesson. I'm looking forward to that arms raised in victory moment when I did it & grats on figuring out 'what your deal' is early enough to be able to even start advocating for yourself & educating yourself. Yay!
Your parents are not professionals. Even if they were, they can't properly diagnose you since you are close to each other.
Find a professional specialized in the spectrum. It can be now or later as an independent adult.
It is important that you get to decide about your life quality and your physical and emotional health. You deserve to be heard, especially if it's about yourself.
For thirteen years of my life, I was labelled as nothing more than "shy" and "introverted", then I got diagnosed with GAD, and shortly after that, ASD. Things are a lot better now.
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I have just turned 30 and was only diagnosed at 27 and it was a huuuuuge relief for me! I was so happy to finally understand why I was different and now I am owning it :)
Yeah I thought I was getting better at social interaction and forced myself to chit chat and stuff and, couple years later, I am now eighteen and I can barely look at people whom I'm talking to. It feels like all that "process" I made with social anxiety was just thrown in the thrash...
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I zone out a lot. I don't make eye contact. I don't like being around being a lot of people. I cant stand my socks being crooked around my toes. I rub my hands lot. I got calluses on my fingers. Im 35 & sometimes I still try to get my mom or sister to talk for me. I obsesse over Rocky Horror or Orange is the new black or American horror story. I have been diagnosed with anxiety & depression & bipolar. Everything you have said in the video is me. I don't like being touched much. Im 35.
Dee Griminger sorry to jump on your post but I also have an issue with sock not being on properly and I even make sure my partner and my kids are on correctly to the extent I have adjusted there socks and they call me strange 😂
@@beckypureheart5625 Thought i was the only 1
I did also that's why I had to jump on your post 🙌
I also have issues with cloth with bad texture. But one time it felt like literal sandpaper on the inside, so thats probably also badly made clothing everywhere. And the cloth is often softer on the *outside* and that feels deceiving
oh my god when the socks are just like half an inch different than the others it’s absolutely infuriating
All of these apply to me. But my obsessions are a bit different. I do get obsessed but it doesn't last long. Sometimes obsession is so strong I get anxiety over it and can't touch the thing again. This is umm... weird but I get obsessed with people. Celebrities in particular. I don't know every single detail about them but I immagine myself knowing them. It's just in my head, no one knows I ever think about this person. I'm currently also obsessed about being a carpenter/woodworker. I have no idea how to get started though. I watch videos on youtube constantly but I don't have tools and space to do it.
Pootin ugghhh saaaammmeee!
Same here
I like to look up celebrity's heights and their ages. Yeah, I want to know how tall a random stranger I saw on t.v once is.
OMG when he was saying obsessing over things I originally didn't think I do that because mine are fleeting it can even be only a week. Reading this is completely me, even the wood working haha. Lol at one point I would go to stores looking for all the equipment and and having to over and over stop myself from getting this stuff for monetary reasons ugh
Pootin I get obsessed with celebs too, but also, with other things. I’m a worrier, have sever anxiety and panic attacks. I’m currently fighting to get diagnosed. I have made these excuses. I’m too tired to go out. I don’t feel well.
Thank you so much for posting about this. I'm a teenage girl diagnosed with Aspergers, anxiety, and depression and seeing this video made me so happy that someone is trying to make a difference for the ASD community.
I'm scared that I'm going to be stuck for the rest of my life at a "teenage" level. As a female I have been able to mask the issues for a long time but now as I'm in my 20s it becomes so much more apparent because everyone else has seemed to leave their "awkward stage" and I'm still here. After learning about aspergers/asd I visited my dad after a long while and was floored because I finally saw things for what they were. He's never been diagnosed but I am sure he has it as well. He would hate the idea that he has anything though so I can't mention it. I just wish people were more understanding. People have really shunned him and rejected him without understanding why he is the way he is. And now that I'm understanding why I am the way I am, it sucks when I can't really share or when I try to with my husband he ignores it because he doesn't know how to deal with it. It really makes it lonely. Thanks for the video.
Sounds like a shitty ass husband.
Give him time! I had the same with my husband when I started suspecting I had ADHD (and all throughout the evaluation period)... That was back in 2011. I was diagnosed and well... Now that I suspect I may be an aspie, he's completely different, he doesn't disregard it and he has taken some of the tests (as a control thing.... Just to check). So he's being supportive, in his own way. Give him time and try to talk to him.
Talking to other autistic people (online) helps so much. Like on forums, not just RUclips comments. I went in to get formally diagnosed because I was crashing and burning, but by the time I got my diagnosis three weeks later, I already felt a lot better because I'd been talking to other autistic NBs & women, and kind of figuring out what had been going wrong.
I really hope things are going better for you now.
I feel ya about being stuck as a teenager. I am 2 weeks away from turning 40 and whenever i interact with much younger colleagues they always seem to be more adult, more put together, more mature than me. I feel like I'm forever 15. Weird, because my daughter is 15 so sometimes shes the one to get me undistracted or it will seem like were just hanging out like 2 friends. I just cannot imagine her friends' parents acting with them the way I do with her. We have a lot of fun sometimes.
Me too... I was talking to my mom about it recently. She said it's ok and that we have support systems. It doesn't feel easy, but I do believe we can manage this effectively.
As a 16 year old female on the spectrum, I often avoid talking about my autism and hearing other people talk about autism makes me cringe because I don’t think I’ve fully accepted my diagnosis, even ten years later. However, you have a very gentle manner when it comes to portraying Autism which made thinking about my symptoms feel so much less uncomfortable and embarrassing, so thank you!
Hey every little helps, 😬⚡️. I am glad you enjoy my videos, thank you for the kind words and thank you for the comment.
"Passionate about one thing."
Club Penguin, Toontown, and League of Legends here.
Hence why I make merch for it for a living and sell at conventions, because it helps with anxiety to be around like-minded people and be mutually excited about video games-
Oh my goodness, CLUB PENGUIN. I used to spend hours and hours on Neopets, but when that got old, Club Penguin took up much more of my time after school than I'd like to admit. I stuck around longer than my friends who quit after a month or two, and soon it reached the point where I would design penguin clothes in Photoshop and email them to the company as suggestions. I knew this wasn't typical of other 6th graders, so I tried to keep this obsession a secret, but occasionally when someone would mention Club Penguin, I'd give myself away by rambling.
I’m really passionate about kpop, crimeology and Minecraft 😂✌️✌️✌️
My brother is also an aspe, and I've realized I learned a lot about talking for him, and from there it's been an aid to my friends both on spectrum and ones with more extreme social anxiety.
I'm constantly seeking to consume more information about and experiences from different folks on spectrum. Thanks for being a voice for a part of your community that is often over looked.
this is interesting. I hate how underdiagnosed girls are as many of them struggle massively, as I know from my own experience. Many 'mask' and hide behind this 'mask'. Girls are more likely to copy other girls, and family members as I did growing up but always wondered why everything felt so difficult and why everyone just seemed to 'know' what they were doing and how to interact with others whereas I didn't. I had to learn everything and its exhausting. Not forgetting the constant sensory difficulties and anxiety that makes things feel impossible.
Thank you for the comment.
Same here!
sophie andrea ME TOO!
I had the same experience
ugh the "shy" label
Yes. My daughter is an Aspie and definitely not shy. lol
However, she does burn out fast and has to withdraw at times.
If you are a human I have at least a little fear of you (I don't completely trust ANYONE EVER!!!!), however it is not usually noticeable until one of my OCDs get triggered. I get very aggressive when scared and start growling, howling, whimpering, excessively drooling, cowering down, hiding and hyperventilating... I've been told that it doesn't look very good from society's point of view... I can't say I BLAME people for looking at me like I'm some sort of demon... Especially in places like Walmart. 😅
P.s. That includes my loved ones. I tend to stay alone in my room....
@@kidwolf0015 I'm one of the few people she trusts and tries to "get" her.
Don't worry about what people at Walmart think of you. They're no one to judge. 😂
I was "snobbish."
I was diagnosed with anxiety-depressive disorder and schizotypal. I only see a therapist once every month or two because of where I live. I am going to bring this up to my therapist because I relate to each symptom you mentioned. Thank you.
I display a majority of these behaviours and I’ve questioned if I have some form of autism for a few years but people say “there’s no way you have it, you don’t freak out all the time” because all they know of it is the meltdowns associated with more severe cases. And as the video talks about, it’s harder to identify in females. It does explain a lot of behaviours and the way my brain works and I may have to talk to someone about this. Thank you for making this. I was far more socially abled when I was younger, but still very shy and introverted. It’s only gotten worse now that I am in the early-to-mid teens. Again, this really helped and I am very grateful that you made this.
It is so varies in people but has some common traits (that’s how it’s diagnosed) I would talk to a professional if you are eBaying to get an official diagnosis :)! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I'm 33 yold and felt identified with all you said. I never thought about this perspective. I don't know if I am in the spectrum but it felt confortable to listen to you and understand that we have to accept our differences. Even today i could totally relate to your example about asking for a pizza on the phone, I still ask my husband to make the call, i love the internet since i don't have to talk to the other side of the phone. I've always been described as a shy child, an introvert. My mother used to 'help' me make friends. I could not engage. I use to have only 1 or 2 friends and avoid contact with groups. on my teen years i was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and recently i sought treatment for anxiety and depression. Anyways.. i can be just feeling related or not.. but what stand out for me on what you said it's how exhausting it feels to have social interaction. I often avoid to hangout with friends and coworkers telling my self i don't feel well.
Thanks for sharing your knowledge and perspectives!
Aláya Dullius I really want yold to be a real word used to abbreviate year old.
hahah i could say i'm not a native speaker, but i was just lazy
Many of the best creations came outbif people being lazy :P
You could also have anxiety disorder like me.
probably is that! I've been treating and feeling better
I feel like we get overlooked and sort of brushed over as "just hormones". When I first told my teachers and friends about my autism they didn't believe me until I actually had to show them my doctor's note thingy mijig (lol). But it's just ridiculous!
That's pretty much just because you are female. I'm diabetic also and I have all the equipment a diabetic wears, and unless I get really forceful about it, my family and former employers would make like I was faking diabetic problems. Even small ones, like needing a second to test my blood sugar or eat to fix a low. I actually had a ketoacidosis episode several weeks ago, as a 14 year diabetic, and my parents thought I was faking. For some reason. It makes people feel good to bring down women, especially pretty ones.
Megan Williams Same here!. Someone said to me that they thought it was hormones, but they have no idea what Autism is.
Ugh that must have been horrible for you. And it feels like a violation when people want evidence. I was constantly told off for just about everything at school. I look back with anxiety and hatred for the most part. At least there is actual help and understanding available now xxx
My therapist is asking me all kinds of questions because I told him I was on the spectrum. He’s still confused about female traits vs male. It’s disturbing how much is unknown
I have my evaluation next week. I've been diagnosed with social anxiety but I doubt it's that...there is so much more to it that you have specified that makes sense to me. This is something I never thought about until watching your videos and it really hit a nerve for me. Honestly thank you for your channel it is so informative and spreads awareness!
I’m 18 and I have Asperger syndrome. I completely relate to that last one. I’m very often seen as the shy/quiet/nice girl and until this year I didn’t have many good friends. Without having a sort of “status” as a senior, I struggled to approach new people. I’m glad this video is out there and that there are people like me out there who are supportive and kind.
Yeah!!!
I'm an older woman with aspergers and as I've gotten older. I am way happier in silence or focusing on a task and losing myself in my own head, all by myself. Going from topic to topic absorbing info like a sponge!
This is very very accurate. I was always diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and/or social anxiety as a child and teenager. Only in my mid twenties I was diagnosed with ASD. I was always viewed as shy but in reality I was struggling alot in social situations so I had to do masking all the time which is exhausting. I have specific obsessional interests and generally only want to talk about those. I don't care for the interests of others. Thanks for explaining to others what autism is all about!
Thank you for all your videos. I'm in America, 39, female, and only discovered this about myself last year. There are so few resources and getting an official diagnosis has been nothing but dead ends. My TP was even told, "we don't even know what that is", when seeking a place to refer me. Your content has been something my wife and I can watch together and gain understanding.
I do have my wife handle a lot of the social things and I find myself having to work harder at being a yes vs. a no on outings as I get older.
I could go on but I'll just finish with, Thank You! Keep being awesome and sharing!
Everyone is telling me to phone my own stuff now that I'm an adult but I still get nervous and anxious and start to freak out heck even when talking to family and friends my heart pounds crazily.
Yeah it can be difficult at times.
I was diagnosed with aspergers few years ago.. Your interest point is ever so slightly wrong. Women, like myself, we don't necessary are interested on one particular thing like men, but we have many or not at all. it doesn't work like this. myself, I wan't to know everything about everything. So maybe my passion is knowledge? I feel like i just watered my whole point there.. but I know for fact, that the interest trait is not similar between males and females.
i feel like u. i seem to be interested in all kinds of info, i get all passionate for a while and then i drop it. i know lots of useless info lol! i think men since they are more compartmentalized naturally, tend to focus on one thing especially if theyre aspies; but we women's brains are more integrated so thats a big difference between men and women
This is a general overview but! Everyone is very much individual and will facet from this a bit.
Exactly me! Altough I think for me, it's my ADHD, that changes the subject of my obsession from time to time, so I collect like awfull amount of information on a topic I'm now passionate for and I don't forget anything, so it's like I'm a living encyclopedia of kitchenmachines, stationary, Harry Potter, languages, programming languages, cars - whatever.
idk about it I tend to have very specific obsessions and interests and also have never masked my autism like other girls did I would just tell people they were annoying lol
My sister calls me “Wikipedia” because I constantly spout bizarre facts or know things that seem odd. I’ll obsess over a subject and research exhaustively before changing subjects. The crazy part is I have sketchy memory (like I seldom know what month it is) but I can recall facts I heard once 10+ years ago and hadn’t thought about since. Same with music. If I have heard a song and knew artist and song title I can recall it a decade later. My kids like to play “Shazam” with me, they queue up the app and I surf the radio and call out songs and artists generally faster than the app can.
A doctor diagnosed my daughter as 1 a genius and 2 almost on the spectrum, said if he checked off one more symptom he would have put in on it. Thankfully the child study team considered his assessment and their own professional experience and are saying she is on the spectrum so that she can have the services she needs. This year has been her best year so far. She was even the 5th grade student of the month for September. A huge change from being the kid hiding under her desk or in the stairwell.
Which makes me think the diagnostic process is somewhat subjective and a bit of art rather than a science.
I got diagnosed at 32 and it explained so much in my life. I didn't know about the bonus fact, I didn't really know why I got less social and it takes more energy for me to be social than before.
I wish someone would have known these things back in the 70's when I was growing up. I haven't been formally diagnosed but I've taken the online test and scored very high. The results said "autistic AF". I just know this is what I have. It all makes so much sense now. My father couldn't stand it that I wouldn't make eye contact so he'd hold my chin up and force me to look at him. To this day I feel I have to make eye contact but it's so awful for me to do. I hate it. I've finally isolated myself so much that I don't step out of the house for months at a time. Friends and family finally gave up and I can't blame them. I'm fantastic with animals and communicate quite well with them when I lose one it takes a part of my soul and I'm destroyed for months on end. I'm obsessed with anything paranormal and anything physics related. I love to read and just be left alone. I think I would have been ok in life if I hadn't had such a mean, abusive father. I know ppl can't blame their parents for their failures in life, but I can honestly say his mental and physical abuse really damaged a very sensitive soul. Sexual abuse was mixed in and seeing some violence about ten years ago really tipped me over the edge. I was at home with a friend and we saw my neighbor beat up and shot through my window. Because of my testimony, these men are in prison for life, bit while my friend was able to pick up with her Life after the shock, I wasn't able to so easily. I just don't do well with humanity being the way it is anymore. I don't want to deal with people anymore. I have my husband but even he gets frustrated because I don't want to go to festivals with him or to his family reunions. I understand, it can't be easy living with someone like me. And the suicidal ideation has been a real problem with me. I didn't know all of this was related to aspbergers till a few months ago. I have anxiety through the roof and in all these years, not one doctor has connected the dots. I'm 48 but feel like I'm 88. I'm tired of fighting my thoughts all alone. It's exhausting. It wouldn't change anything if I had a professional diagnosis. I don't know if there's medications for this. I've done the anxiety drugs and they help temporarily then I just get hooked. I had to clean myself off of the pain pills and anxiety drugs they pumped me with. I'm proud of myself, it wasn't easy, but I've been drug free for a year now. There's nothing pharmaceuticals can do for me. I know I could do better and try harder to assimilate myself into the world, but it's just so difficult. I suppose this hasn't been too uplifting for anyone to read. I don't feel sorry for myself, but I do feel sorry for the little girl in me that was crushed by a man that didn't know how to love or be compassionate. I wish all the children could just be safe and treated kindly. Maybe it was one of the blows I took to the head that made me not right. Who knows. I'm sorry for writing this. There's too much for me to sit and erase and I've got hungry cat's crying for food. I wish anyone reading this a safe and happy life. I love you, I just don't want to be around you 😘
oh i hope it gets better for you
If your black growing up in the hood its a nightmare to be a girl with Aspergers and not know it until your 50. You really have to fit in and being different is a no-no. Your surpose to be cool and thats that. Someone in the hood is not surpose to like hiking or camping, reading, star trek to the point of having the star trek books and love science and collect comic books. You have to look people in the face and understand what people are saying to you. I thought people were talking in code to keep me out of the conversation. They used me and abused me and even now I dont like being around them but now I have a job where I work with tons of Black people and I find they hate me and will still not talk to me. I do not conform to peoples idea of what I should be like and will never will. I will never wear a weave or have my nails done and decided against having kids when I saw no one was doing that well with kids. I hate rap music also and find no value in it and the words in rap are foul at best.. I found one black friend out of the brunch but she is no longer there. I stand up for myself now and do not care if they do not like the fact that I am much more knowledgeable on subjects than they are and I hate that they are not intersted in learning any thing at all and are content to be stagnant. I do tend to by habit spout out facts on a subject which is I thought was called conversation, but they will not talk to me. They think its strange for me to know all that stuff and I am shocked they do not. I do not hate them and love to listen to them talk because black people have a way with words no one else has and will say words incorrectly but it sounds cool when they do it and its fun to hear them but I wish they would grow and learn more because they are smart. My family did not like me either and admired me at the same time. They did not know what was wrong with me and I wanted them to like me but my mother did not like me but they liked my adventurous spirit and longed to be as free as me because I was always going to places they could not and seeing new things.. We are only now working things out but it was so bad living with them that I dont trust them much. I hang around scientist and who ever I find along the way to be friends with and life is good. Took years for me to say this but ' BUT I LIKE ME' I'm intersting and there are many just like me and they are interesting as well. Think will take my telescope outside if its still dark right now. Yes, Im a black woman with a large telescope and I love the stars. Weren't you lisenting?
ohmymonkey22 sorry people treated you like that. But you go girl! That confidant attitude now. I guess 50 years sure teach you a lot of things. I bet you're wise now. Yeah black ones have a cool animated side about them usually. I'm used to having some in my congregation where I lived in NC, white and black but after I moved to TX is mainly Spanish and white. But different people are all interesting in their own way. :)
Good for you Hun enjoy I get you.😉
ohmymonkey22 I just want to say that I'm so proud of you. Even though you endured all of this you stayed far enough removed to find your true self. I hope that makes sense. God bless you! You are a 🌟
ohmymonkey22 I would love to be friends with you! I am almost 40 and I believe I have lived my entire life with Asbergers. No one ever got me either! I was always the weird one, and I was bullied in High school, but I didn't know that it was wrong. I thought that this group of girls just didn't like me. I never spoke up for myself. I have often said I hate people. I love animals. I look at the birds and I say hello to them. I love nature. I could look at the stars forever. I wish I had a telescope. I love poetry and write poetry about nature. I follow scientists on Twitter!!! Lol! You are a awesome lady. I loved reading your story. I totally get you. My son was diagnosed with Asbergers at age 14. So yes I believe this is me as well. I love him so much. Take care. ❤
A bit problematic with your generalizations of black people. It could be your neighborhood or town but there are lots of black weirdo’s in the world and plenty who would accept you if they knew you.
Every single one of these hit home so much. Thank you for this video.
I can totally see myself in these descriptions, especially the last one. I'm happy i've told my mom about my asperger's suspection and she's very supportive of it, i hope i will be able to get a diagnosis, i'm almost 18 now.
I’m a 15 year old girl with High functioning Autism, I was just diagnosed with it only a year and half ago because my parents didn’t know enough about girl’s systems with Autism. I went through 14 years of absolute no help with my autism because no one could tell I had it, when really the signs were all there. Those 14 years of not understanding what was wrong with me, crying because no one knew how to me, being told to ‘just suck it up and deal with it’, and overall just suffering could have been avoided if my parents watched this video. I expressed these traits when I was younger very clearly and still do, but in smaller ways. I wanted to thank you for making this video, I’ve felt like I, and girls in general, are constantly overlooked and just told to suck it up when it comes to Autism. We need more people like you to spread awareness about Autism.
Oh hey!! ooh make sure to sing up to my mailing list so you are first to know when I publish new content :)!! -> bit.ly/Autism_Updates
Diagnosed at age 60 - went through what you went through for 60 years. Glad you now know so young, so give yourself a good life moving forward! ❤
I completely stumbled onto this video. Thought it would be a very interesting topic. And now I'm walking away from it thinking that I might need to find some place to have a professional weigh in on me.
Things I know from my childhood I don't have much memory of include, my parents said I didn't start talking until very late. In pre-k I had to change my first pre-school because I was scared to interact with other kids.
Things I know. I am anxious when interacting with people, but I love being on stage, in the spotlight, as long as I'm not having to talk to people. When I do interact, I do want it on my terms or I find I have nothing to say. I've had people tell people who were with me that I make them awkward because I won't talk, but I just think that either everything is fine or I have nothing to say. The whole obessive hobby thing and focus on that is something I've always had. I just attributed it to one track mind.
IDK, just never saw anything framed in this way and now my chest is tight and I need to lie down. Thanks for the video.
👍🏼
I'm afraid these videos may make alot of people believe they have autism strictly bc they have certain personality. it's more if it causes extreme problems in ur life. cant get or keep a job, relationship issues, other basic life skills that are negatively affected
I feel this so much! Never went through diagnosis or proper therapy, but I grew up mimicking social tactics and sometimes even trying to decode cues like how long to maintain eye contact or how to sit and stand... and I've been frustrated with how I can't speak coherently in long, fluid sentences during in-person conversations with strangers, when I can express myself much better in writing. Always thought it was social anxiety and depression, but now I'm suspecting something more.
My daughter on the spectrum is obsessed with My Little Pony. Spot on with this video. Great information.
Oh awesome!! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I am 23 and I've been referred to the Adult Autism Team, where I live, to be assessed for ASD but the waiting list is ridiculously long so I don't have a clue when I'll get a definitive answer. So, I'm just going to go through each point to reaffirm my belief that I am on the Autism Spectrum. This will be the longest comment on a video I've ever written. 😂
1. I still do this! I literally ask one of my parents or a friend to order something for me or to ask for something for me; although, i'm getting better at phoning for appointments and things myself. I even had my friend hand out my Christmas cards to our class last year!
2. My passions jump and change a lot but last for years at a time. When I'm into something I'm reeeeaalllly into it and I have to actively stop myself from talking about it all the time and people get annoyed with me if I go on about it.
3. I've learned not to do this anymore but it is related to 2. I was unaware that I did this up until my friends at school fell out with me because I was constantly talking about whatever I was "obsessed" with and I didn't engage in how they were or what they were interested in.
4. I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Recently, this has been getting the better of me and I have been avoiding college and work placement things because of the social aspects causing me anxiety. I also pretty much never go out with friends. In all honesty, I'd just rather not plus I generally find the world to be a scary place and I worry about things that probably won't happen if I go out.
5. YeS. The shy thing. My ex-friends at secondary school literally told me that I couldn't hang out with them anymore and that they didn't want to be friends with me because I was tOO QUIET WHAT KIDN OF EXCUSE. Clearly, I still have feelings about it lol. When I'm at family things, everyone's always like "wOw, LyNn, YoU'rE VeRy TaLkAtIvE!!!!" and laugh and I'm like "Haha. Yeah. Same joke. Every time. How Funny. Can we go home yet." Also, at my last college, about 4 or 5 years ago, I was labelled as "wee quiet Lynn". For some reason quiet = innocent. People used to literally tell me to cover my ears when they were telling their sex stories or even if they were swearing. Like????? I am a person??? Like you???? Just because I'm quiet, doesn't mean I'm a little angel or something????? I'd just rather listen to your stupid/embarrassing/ridiculous/funny stories????? I honestly have almost zero life experience because I'm too anxious to do things, so, I have no stories to tell???? 😂
6. I think I was fine with social interaction at nursery and primary school. Then the transition to secondary school completely shook me and I became more and more withdrawn and then all the bullying and bad stuff happened which obviously made it worse... I used to play with my cousins fine when I was little and now I can't talk to them at family events. I can't talk to any of my family properly to be honest. I just sit and listen to everyone talking and even that takes it out of me.
Woooo. If you read this, I am deeply sorry.
Whoop that’s an epic comment haha! Keep them coming! Thank you!!!
This sounds just like me. I’m obsessed with Harry Potter, Disney, at one point Michael Jackson, and to an extent: Starkid. But mostly Disney. I memorise all the words to films, know random facts no one cares about, collect Disney shit, worked in Disney stores and Disney world. I am diagnosed with anxiety and depression but I feel there’s more to it than that because my triggers seem random and nothing any counsellor has said I feel really applies to me. I don’t have much empathy for other people, I’m quite irritable, and as a child I wasn’t shy I was too aggressive and forwards. I can’t stand smelly perfumes on tubes, loud noises and crowds make me anxious, and bright lights - especially retail ones - give me migraines. I don’t like people changing plans last minute and I don’t like not knowing plans in enough advance so my course stresses me out to no end when they send me timetables the night before.
The Lynn Diaries hi! I know this is an old comment, but I was wondering if you could tell me how you sought a diagnosis as an adult? I’m 18 and have little clue how to go about it. Thank you.
Hello! I made a list of the reasons why I suspect that I am on the Autism spectrum and took it to my GP. She actually just sat and read it while I waited. Then she attached the list to the referral letter to send off to an Autism specialist. I then had an agonising 4 month wait for a letter that said there is a lengthy waiting list for a diagnostic assessment. So, I am not diagnosed yet... and I have a feeling that it could take years. I'll still be hanging on in there, though. Good luck, if you decide to seek a diagnosis!
The Lynn Diaries I just love you..I had to say that 💕
You just described my life. My family always thought I was shy and researching to understand one of my students behavior and how to properly interact with him, Inrealized I had A LOT of autistic traits. Everytime I wacht a video or read something about female autism, is like looking into a mirror. Is still hard to talk about it with my family because they "don't see it in me" but I FEEL. I had to give up my carrer as a teacher because it was impossible for me to handle the kids and their parents, the other teachers and all the job tasks. I was going crazy. Today I work as translator and I am very much happier because I don't need to see anyone but my close family. I becoming "a werdo" but I love myself much more now I know "what is wrong with me". Thank you for this video. I'm adding it to a playlist to show my family how autism really works. 😊
Hey that’s awesomely interesting.
Yes I have Aspergers and been diagnosed and this is me. Thank you for this
My friend is on the spectrum and I definitely noticed the anxiety. One of the prominent things about her anxiety is that she monitors her diet, being afraid to eat too unhealthy, or she has anxiety about having a phone out when on the streets because she's afraid of people judging her.
One of the things I did notice after you mentioned it is that she never really asked me to order anything from her, she's perfectly able to order her own food in McDonalds or in a pizza place. Not sure if she doesn't have that symptom, but if she did, then I'm super proud of her for overcoming it!
How about consistent bullying because people are trash
Yeah people can suck some times.
Are you not really good at insults because you can sense other people's insecurities as soon as you meet them? That really helps with bullies.
Amythest Jasmine your wonderful just the way you are .people bully because they are insecure. They have the problem.
Yeah I get called a weirdo which doesn't help with the socialising thing
What about the trolls who are aspies. Theres a dark side of aspergers people dont seem to talk about
OMGOSH! Thank you for sharing this! My 8 year old son has autism and I just realized that so does my 16 year old daughter. Her and I just had an awesome conversation about this and I think we are both so relieved to have an answer to the things she has experienced her entire life. She is high functioning and it never occurred to me until at the same time I saw your video God reminded me of some early childhood signs. You will be in my prayers! I homeschool my children so knowing that they are on the spectrum is really going to help us! Thank you again for your videos!
Thank you so much for this video, endless gratitude 🥺
I was diagnosed at age 11 after a misdiagnosis with ADHD.
My obsession is Nintendo, especially Mario, Pokemon and EarthBound.
I'm a perfectionist so I get anxious about doing something new unless it's similar to something I have done before. Because of this, I always interrupted class whenever I got a question wrong, especially in my math classes and I ended up having to be on independent study for 2 and a half years in high school. I still graduated with high honors, though. I also hate being rejected, which is why I dreaded group projects or having to find a partner because every time I would also someone to be my partner or a part of their group, they either all ready had a partly or flat up say no.
I can never tell is someone is being serious or joking unless they have a really specific tone to it.
Yeah I understand all them points.
Adhd is always a side diagnosis to Asd, you usually don't have one without the other. X
Thank you for making this video!
I'm female and in my mid 20s, who isn't diagnosed but questioning, and I wonder:
- Is crying a way of stimming? I cry a lot, without knowing why I'm even crying or without feeling sad, but I think I'm doing it to relieve myself from some form of weird pressure inside me. It always happens when I'm overstimulated to some degree, either because I'm happy or sad, or because the environment is too loud and I cannot really handle it.
- Sarcasm. Sure, it's said that those on the spectrum usually don't get it, but what if it's the other way around? I get sarcasm, and to be more precise, I LOVE hearing sarcasm (but I'm not really aware when I'm using it myself). But at the same time, I never get it when people aren't sarcastic. I've had quite a lot of conversations that ended awkwardly because I mistook a serious statement for sarcasm.
Hey no problem thank you for the kind words and thank you for the info and comment.
I cry every day at least once. I've figured out it's simply an overload of emotion. I feel happy the same as sad... it hits me like an overwhelming tsunami of emotion and I cannot stop myself from crying. The only way I can decipher if I'm happy or sad is to examine the events leading up to the feeling...
For example: I'm crying. It feels huge and overwhelming and my system is shocked. Am I happy or sad?
...I have to ask myself what JUST happened right before this feeling hit me? If my dog just died I can conclude I feel sad-pain and thus I'm crying. If a person just saved a puppy from a burning building I can conclude I'm feeling happy-pain. I truest cannot distinguish one from the other without knowing the even that lead up to the triggering of the emotional tsunami.
The feelings are so intense they always register with my system as a form of "pain" thus I cry. The good news is I tend to happy cry a lot more then I sad cry. The bad news is even witnessing the slightest act of selfless human compassion like letting the car next to them in to merge onto the highway will set me off with happy-pain and crying.
I would have to say that since stimming is a form of emotional regulation that the crying is basically doing the same thing. It may not be true stimming by definition, but it is preforming the same function as stimming by helping you bring yourself back into a state of being emotionally regulated. Helping you internally normalize, calm and re-focus yourself.
I get feelings of extreme excitement if it's something I like and clap or I laugh and stifle it into a weird inhale. If it's something that isn't pleasant (a room of 50+ people talking at once), I feel like ripping out my hair and I get depression-like symptoms. The excited claps and inhales are relatively new, though.
I too do not have a diagnosis (can't see how I could get one in my area, California) but also questioning on and off, whenever I have problems in life coming back here makes me feel I'm not alone for once. The crying thing happens to me too (and I am not a crier) it just happens when I am overstimulated. And the sarcasm thing too. I realized that I have learned to either take someone seriously all the time or sarcastic all of the time (depending on my experience with that person) but that leads to both taking sarcasm literally or seriously and think they mean what they said, responding accordingly OR exactly your experience of someone being serious but took it sarcastically. Someone said they were hurt and I thought they were being sarcastic but they were actually hurt.
I totally get the crying thing. I'm not diagnosed but I have a lot of the signs; at the least, I definitely have some form of sensory processing disorder which explains SO MUCH. I don't cry as much as I used to, but can definitely cry from pure overwhelm, not necessarily from eg sadness.
I recently got diagnosed and watching these videos makes me feel less excluded. Thanks for the video :)
This video is spot on! My five year old daughter has been placed on the spectrum and every trait you mention fits her. She is in preschool now and #6 is becoming more and more apparent.
Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
Thank you so much for making this video. As a female with Asperger's Syndrome,this really brightens my day. Hopefully through your content,people will be more understanding of autism in both boys and girls.
Yes I hope so! Thank you for the comment.
I was one of the few autistic women who were diagnosed at age 2. My symptoms were quite "masculine" when I was really little. Everything you pointed matched my autistic experience as I got older. I also have hyperlexia, which means that my reading ability is so advanced that I was miles ahead of my NT peers. This is attributed to my Autism, and I have heard that it's a common trait in autistic girls. As a part of developing my disguise as an NT, or what I like to call my taupe mask, I quickly learned that I couldn't talk about my special interest all the time, and I had to ask people about their interests and how their day has been.
In 43 and just got diagnosed. The hurdles are ridiculous.
Hey, I am 28 and I was diagnosed in December 2019. And I am so happy. Finally I can understand to myself. Sorry for my broken English, I am from Czech Republic.
Hey your English is perfect 👌🏼. Fantastic to know you feel happy now 😀✌🏼💚. Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
Masking is societal as well. Women tend not to be train spotters. Men on the spectrum often focus on more abstract interests that are more obvious. Women tend to hide their special interests. Again, this is cultural- men are encouraged in math and stats, etc where women are forced to be more sociable and soft skills so from early age we are pushed to hide things or can hide things more because we have been taught more about sociability (and avoidance) as females where males are more likely to be encouraged in their special interests at first or not held to the same social expectations.
Yes very good info. Thank you for the comment.
I'm a 26 year old woman, I've been married 8 1/2 years, I have a 2 year old and a 7 year old, my 7 year old is on the spectrum and was on diagnosed a year and a half ago, my whole life I've been mimicking how others behave but I thought everyone did, my whole life I've always felt weird/different/thought differently/experienced things differently but didn't say anything because I thought everyone was like me and nobody else talked about it.....
I have been the parent of a child on the spectrum and never thought I could be on the spectrum.... I was diagnosed yesterday and just learning that the way I experience life so drastically different than how others experience it blew my mind!
If you are a female and experience sense's that others don't, don't know what emotion your feeling, feel or think of things others find odd, mimic the behavior of others in social situations, experience feeling like you can't/don't have to breath for no reason or just have always had a general suspicion that you are different.... It is worth looking into a diagnosis!
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This and the other one with the autistic lady has had me in tears. I came to your channel because my son has strong traits which like you said at the end are getting stronger as he is getting older. Since he was born he and me have been like two peas in a pod, we both feel like we understand each other, I feel like I've never known another person so much like me. After watching your female autism vids I've got to say, that's me, too. I masked for years using drugs and alcohol. Jobs lasted a while before I had episodes of severe anxiety and depression and I quit. As a child, yes, shy, yes, selective mutism, all of that. Now I just have to decide what to do about it.
I think when I saw this video in my recommended I worried if something was untrue about my own diagnosis of the spectrum disorder, but I do relate to most of the symptoms here...
I’ve just been put in speech classes and educational programs my whole life and the people around me push me to do my best and talk more and speak out, so some people doubt me when I talk about it since it’s not as much of a hinderance as everyone expects.
It’s fine though. Great video and keep up the nice work!
As a girl with Asperger syndrome I approve this video.
Thank you.