Talking with Someone who is Suicidal | Kati Morton
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- Опубликовано: 27 июл 2024
- 1) ask questions & listen. I know many people worry that by even bringing up suicide you could make it worse for someone, but trust me, it’s actually better to bring it up, talk about it, and give them a safe space to express what’s going on.
2) don’t try to fix it! I know we love them and want them to feel better, but this isn’t something we can fix.
3) offer real support. What I mean by that is offer to help them find a mental health professional, take them to appointments, help pay for it if you can, or simply check in on them regularly and see how they are doing.
4) Stick with them. Now I know that sounds a bit odd, but many of you have told me that the reason you waited so long to speak up and reach out was because you were afraid of people leaving you, saying you were too much of a burden and you feeling worse than you did before. Reassuring your loved on that you will stick with them through this, and that you are happy to support them and be there for them will go a long way.
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If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room.
One of the signs that is often missed is a sudden recovery, people assume that the person is feeling better and everything is ok but it’s actually a huge red flag
A very good point. I have experienced that behaviour myself. It feels such a relief to have a ‘way out’ finally decided that a lot of stress is lifted and that comes across as suddenly being much better.
Well-observed!
Yeah my retarded family doesnt notice shit about what i've planned. I'm hoping I 100 % ruin the family. They wanted to create a demon. They've succeeded.
Very true..
It's because they are thinking they're finally going to have all the pain stop.
Knowing that it won’t trigger suicide to talk about it is vital.
There’s big differences between not wanting to be alive and actively wanting to kill yourself, and another step again to be planning it.
What if you plan it, but are too scared to act it out? What if the only thing that you're afraid of is the unknown, and that's what death is? What do you do when the only reason you didn't end up dying, was because you're scared?
......asking for...a friend...
@@justnobody5112 reach out to someone, anyone. Could be a friend, a counselor, or support groups online. Its important that you don't feel like you're fighting all on your own. Wanting to die but being scared is often a silent cry for help. It can be very isolating and overwhelming. Try distracting yourself by doing things that used to make you happy(that's what worked for me).
Take your time and know the struggle is worth it. ❤
Listen more, talk less and be sure to not make it about yourself, focus on that person and keep in mind, they are not you. This really helped me when I was helping a friend.
Thank you so much for the tip! xoxo
Thank you Kati for doing such great work and for replying! 😊
Spot on. I've stopped sharing my feelings because people make it about them. If I am dealing with my mother...they get upset because their mother has passed away... THIS ISNT ABOUT YOU!!! Listen
My mom does the complete opposite of all these tips... always makes it about her and never listens or even try to understand.
ffs, wish my friends could do this
“don’t try to fix it”
THANK 👏🏼 YOU👏🏼 KATI👏🏼 i think people have good intentions but as you said in the moment it is incredibly invalidating and makes me want to isolate even more
So glad you felt the tips I offered are good ones!!! xoxo
@@Katimorton Well about the tip Stick with them
I have a friend that doesn't want to let me be around them when they are going to cook or going to walk when they said the same Day that his mental is not even a bit stable
How do i help him then?
"Someone else's mental health is NOT your responsibility." it's so hard to admit that but it's so true. I honestly try to ALWAYS be there for people who are going through rough times and I find myself constantly getting burnt out because I want to help but I can't force them to take my help or get professional help and it really sucks
Well for me I learnt that I don’t want to live for myself as there is no point so I live for others meaning that I’m the same.
My friend recently told me they had planned to kill themselves in a few months that’s, well. If that person dies I’m gonna go with them.
@@Maddy_VA u still alive? I hope you are
same sadlley
@@Drummerdudegirl hi yeah.. I'm getting help now sorry I was in a bad place !
@@Maddy_VA you don't have to apologise for being in a bad place. I hope it all works out
Just sit with them, let them talk, listen and don't judge. It really helps. Thank you.
Thank You.
Noted my friend just attempted it and idk what to do I just wanna do something knowing I could do something just not knowing how to do it
But when I ask them if they're ok they say they're fine. Ik theyre not but they just won't say anyhting how do I deal with this?
@@naww8210 ask them in a quiet, alone place and make them sure that u wont judge them
"Dont try and fix it"- yikes! I do this. I try and give advice when I really have no place to give advice. Thanks for making this video and helping me be a better friend
I would highly recommend the book how to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk - it’s helped me so much to build strong and honest connections with people and it’s easy to understand and incorporate into your way of speaking
People need to feel special. When we tell someone in pain they shouldn't be, or try to explain why they shouldn't be, it doesn't change their feelings - but often makes them feel more inadequate. Listening and staying with them truly communicates they are special and worth it.
I agree. It is much more important to listen to someone in that situation than to give them advice or try to "fix" them.
Couldn't agree more. xoxo
People need to feel heard and helped with their actual problems not told they’re special and everything will get better. I’ve been there and that approach is basically useless.
@@HeavySmoker22 I'm not saying they should be "told" they are special. We need to feel we are special. Many times we do that for ourselves and it shows in our bias. Showing other people they are special is showing interest in them, investing time in them, not just saying things to them. People can tell the difference.
Sorry Paul i jumped the gun there a bit, thanks for clarifying. I agree it’s about feeling connected and worthwhile in some sense, just got a bit triggered about everyone wanting to feel special.
My best friend tells me that I am the only thing keeping her alive. I feel bad, it puts so much pressure on me and It's all I can think about all day. I don't want to sound selfish, but it feels like I'm going through it too, I can't focus and I can only think about her. I don't know what to do.
Me too
I feel the exact same. I’m not built for helping people so it feels like even more pressure because I’ve been doing everything this RUclips video told me not to do. it’s so stressful because I want to help but I don’t know where to start and it’s not great knowing ur friend could one day just not be there.
I've been suicidal before and believe me I would rather have someone bring it up to see if I'm ok than not too.
Insomnia and erratic behavior and mood swings, high distress and crying a lot are other signs
Also, don't take it personally. It's not about a single person or event. This only makes it worse bc they start to feel like they're hurting you and get worse. On top of it they'll learn to hide it better to try an not hurt you. Please just don't express taking it personally💖
Emerald Emily thank you so much for this reminder. I thought about no longer reaching out to people after having my feelings hurt when I did. I had to readjust my thinking and realize it wasn’t personal just emotion because I really didn’t want to not help out a hurting friend.
Thanks. A topic so desperately in need of discussing. So many people out there don't know how to respond to someone who is suicidal. Im learning this in my mental health course I've been doing. Great work.
Blondie-11 Yes. And talking about it really does take so much power out of it. The more matter of fact and upfront we can all be in our conversations about it, the less of a hold it has.
Blondie-11 I can tell you what we need most, love , not judgement
I’ve been suicidal so long I can’t believe other people don’t feel suicidal.
Life saving video. Thank you. If you’re struggling? The very moment you feel like letting go? Remember why you’ve held on so long......might be something big, an event, might be something minor, like looking forward to a new movie.....there’s a reason you’ve held on this far. ✌🏽
Cowardice.
Fear of death, really. That's all.
Thank you
@@iainpennywatson I'm not really sure what you mean by that. If you are you are saying that you feel people who are feeling suicidal or that have committed suicide are cowards ( I have a friend who feels that way) you couldn't be more wrong. You and no one else can possibly understand the overwhelming pain they are in and hopelessness/helplessness they feel. I hope you are not giving that message to anyone who is currently feeling suicidal. Instead, simply encourage them to seek professional help.
@@justnobody5112 I'm not sure I understand the meaning of your comment. I'm just trying to understand.
Adding to the "stick with them" tip, make plans to hang out with them, and if they cancel, don't get offended, just reschedule and try again, as many times as needed. Send cards, or flowers, or a funny video you just saw. Remind them you are thinking of them, even if they don't reply right away, or at all.
TY Katie-
I've been waiting for a therapist for my PTSD for 8 yrs.
I want & need therapy & can't get it.
The ONLY things that get me through are your channel & art.
TY for existing-you prevent my death often.
Wow! 8 years is a long time! Wish you the best! I am glad you have found a healthy outlet!
It's true, PTSD work is so hard to try to approach! I just started work this year for a trauma from 25 yrs ago bc it took me that long to feel ready, and after 3 months had to take a break. Hold on boo
@@BethGreenwood TY :) I have cptsd but autocorrect changed it. I will give the channel a try & I appreciate you for sharing and offering solidarity & a source 💕💕💕💕 Be Well & Hugs!!
@@ColinCasperLMHC TY - XO (It is... ) 💕XO
@M B TY • I'm in Canada & it's been due to an annoyingly unbelievable string of admin. errors. I've been erroneously dumped from several waiting lists after several doctors I'd been waiting for either retired or moved.💕💕💕💕One doctor completely forgot about the ptsd cos I have a serious heart condition too.
It's really difficult to wait but everyone is so kind on this channel and Katie truly helps
Be Well & Hugs!!😊
Hi katie. I was suicidal after my divorce. I felt very desperate one day and reached out to a work friend that told me she went through the same thing. I asked her when she felt like living again... The difference was she would ask me directly if I was having suicidal thoughts. She came and walked with me and let me talk about the pros and cons of suicide. Just not being embarrassed to talk about such a shameful topic helped me.
Great tips. I have worked for a suicide prevention line for 2 years and I want to encourage people to volunteer as counselors. 99% of our counselors are volunteers. They go through extensive training and there is usually no prior experience necessary. As more people get volunteer experience on the Lifeline we will have a society that is more equipped to handle mental health challenges.
I am in mental health unit after trying to hurt self this vidoe was so helpful and I going send it to my family so they can understand a bit more
I am so glad you are getting help and support.. and I hope my video helps your family understand so they can be supportive too :) xoxo
Best wishes for you. I hope your outlook on life gets better for you.
As someone who has attempted suicide, nine years ago. I have to say that the one thing I have had support from good friends.
When I first shared my feelings, I felt I couldn’t go on. Now nine years on, I realise that all needed was someone to listen to me and understand.
Thanks for posting this video.
I know someone who has had suicidal ideation for 34 years. I told her that I don't want her to die, but I also don't want her suffering to continue, so unless or until I have an idea for a solution, I'm not going to stop her doing it. She really appreciates that. Not so long ago, I was right on the edge of suicide. I remember how much suffering is involved. My experience is that the majority try to bully a person into not committing suicide without addressing the suffering, and the truth is that that is really selfish, because what it comes down to is that they want the person to continue being in their lives, and the person's suffering doesn't matter to them. Controversial, perhaps. But true.
"don't try to fix it"
Thank you Kati for saying this!! I really needed to hear it because I used to be very suicidal and now I understand why when my parents told me to just go do something and stop laying in bed being lazy that made it worse. I'm way less suicidal now than I was a year ago but hearing this helps me understand and maybe be able to tell the person that that isn't helping if they say something like that.
It's also important to not take anything personally when the friend or family member says harsh things, especially if they have BPD. Those of us with BPD can be ugly when we're in pain, but it's because we're scared you don't care or will abandon us. Reassure the person that you won't. Just be present, and listen. Don't give invalidating advice. That's not what we need to hear, we just want you to be there.
This is for you if you are struggling, if you feel like giving up, if you feel like you don't have any more fight left in you, I want to tell you this: You are worth it, you were put on this Earth for a reason, you have a purpose in this life. The pain your feeling now is only temporary . Your life is worth fighting for you are not alone. Things will get better for you, there is light at the end of the tunnel.
You are stronger than you think. Don't give up and never lose hope. I want you to know there’s a future waiting for you, if you choose to get there. In your future, you’ll know happiness. In your future, this dark cloud won’t be hovering over you, and you will meet some of the most remarkable people.
There are many wonderful days ahead of you.❤️❤️❤️You’re unique, amazing, beautiful, needed, wanted, and loved by so many. Your presence in the world, it matters. I need you to know that.Dont be afraid to get help and speak up .You’ve been so strong up to this point, and I am so proud of you for continuing to fight 🦋🦋
Thank you x
It’s a nice thought, but essentially it’s nonsense. Sorry.
iainpennywatson wow thanks for the positivity
Titi Oke Positivity for positivities sake is utterly pointless, well to me anyway what you say sounds nice but it’s meaningless to a lot of people, I have nothing and I’m preparing to end it. If you want to get better you will and I don’t do everything you say means nothing. Sorry, but you have to understand some people can’t pretend to be positive with no evidence for any reason to be. But what you say too some will feel good and it’s a nice thing to do but some people it’s pointless.
I don’t so*
As a crisis counselor with Crisis Text Line, I thank you for the important service you provide here, and for supporting us with this fundraiser.
🔥ATTENTION🔥This video isn’t monetizable & won’t run ads cause it talks about suicide. Kati KNEW this but made it anyway cause so many people need it. KATI IS THE HERO WE DON’T DESERVE!!!!! ❤️❤️❤️ Show your thanks by supporting her 🌟PATREON!!!🌟
www.patreon.com/katimorton
Why should be everything recompenced with money? This materialistic approach is exactly the opposite to what help should be.
Candy Twiggy Twist Kati provides all of her videos 100% free to everyone, which she chooses to do because she believes help shouldn’t only be available for those who can afford it. However, I believe that Kati also deserves to be able to pay her rent so I choose to provide her with what financial help I can afford and I encourage others to do the same. You and everyone else are under NO obligation to finically support Kati for all of the resources she provides us at no cost, but to say that Kati shouldn’t have a way to support herself for her content is offensive.
Who are you? Looks loke a fake account, subscribed only to Kate's channel and liking only her videos ?? This is not sane.
I lost my mom to suicide last August. Thank you for bringing up the topic. Unfortunately, even with so many people taking all of these steps with my mom it still didn’t stop her. I guess my 2 cents would be to anyone else who has lost someone, just know it was NOT your fault. I have worked tirelessly to unburden my guilt, but it still it hits me sometimes. So many “what ifs” that I have literally thrown them up. This will be a forever work in progress to recover from. If you are feeling suicidal, I promise it is absolutely not the answer. Your life is more precious than I can express. You mean something in this world. You are needed.
Kara McDonald so sorry you had to go through that 😿. Kati has a great video on losing someone to suicide that u may find helpful ruclips.net/video/Tj8DXLnURZE/видео.html
Thank you Kati for pointing out that we are not responsible for someone else's mental health. I had friends in the past that were suicidal and I felt sooo bad that I was not able to help them, it almost felt like it was my fault for not making them feel better. As you said it's up to them to decide that they want to get better and work for it, all we can do is be there for them and support them.
Thank you for this video I’m a childhood abuse survivor and ex firefighter , military too and so many die a day and this is important all I can say is never give up and stay strong
I'm 20. I've had all of the symptoms since 2013. I isolated myself and what my friends decided to do was abandon me. I have no friends now. My family have also been no different to be honest. I tried to hide it so well, and for the most part I did, and I don't think anyone really realised how I felt but they all just left me. No one has ever cared for me in my life.
I've definitely started to isolate myself when I was going. through this... luckily I'm on the other side of the tunnel now. Simply asking R U OK? can make such a difference. Thank you so much for discussing on this topic! Especially because this is really close to home and to some of my close friends❤this has been very useful🌹🌹🌹if you're reading or watching this video, please remember you're not alone❤
Asking are you OK really never helps it makes me feel like I am making it obvious and makes me want to stay alone even more...
Yikes
@@alexmcdreamy9936 how about......im right here for you? Ive got you back if you need me ad im not going anywhere? Does that help at all? Promising not to judge and just to listen and let you vent. Does that mean anything?
Kind of way better than asking r u OK yes
@@alexmcdreamy9936 agreed
I really appreciate you talking about how unhelpful the intuitive things to say can be. When I am really down, not only do I not believe it will get better and such, I am unsure if I even want it to anymore.
I'm at the lowest point in my life and this video really hit home for me...your videos help me a lot....it's like talking to someone with out having anyone to talk to.
Lynn Modest so sorry your in a bad place right now but know that with the right help it DOES get better! ❤️ Also ck out Kati’s video on how to deal with ur own thoughts of suicide ruclips.net/video/6n3XEbloPRI/видео.html
What a great video, we don’t always know what to say in those kind of situations. And the fact that you say that others mental health is not our responsabilities. Because once I thought I was the one that kept a friend alive because she told me that all the time and talked about her suicidal thoughts to me every day. It was so draining for me since I was also in a dark place in that time.
Anyway, thanks for your awesome videos!
This was amazing, really well dealt with for such a sensitive subject. Listening is so important, people need to be heard and need to be shown that you care
I'm so glad you posted about this!!
Awe you really are lucky!! Having support is so important!! xoxo
Kati Morton It absolutely is, sometimes we all need some help!! Nobody can do everything alone!! ❤️
Thank you Kati. I have been watching many of you videos. As someone who suffers from BPD, BED, PTSD, and Depression I have struggled so long with my suicidal idealization. I have been, well in FL, Baker Acted multiple times and been to treatment both from Alcohol and Substance abuse and for my Eating Disorder. The struggle is so very real and it is a constant battle. Anyways, you channel is very informative, for someone like me who "wants to know the problem" so I can work on solving it and taking appropriate action. Keep doing what you are doing. God Bless
This is so important for people to understand! I work at a Baker Act unit for teenagers and I don't think many people realize how often this comes up for the people they are about. Many people just avoid it because it is too uncomfortable to talk about.
I'm so happy you talked about crisis text line! I volunteer for them and they are a really great support line. I hope more platforms like this can help the people who need it :)
I just listened to my friend and held them whilst they cried on my shoulder. They asked me about my own experience (years ago I attempted suicide and wound up in the hospital). I told them why I turned myself into the hospital and told them how happy I was that I was still here. My friend listened and we sat together for a long time just crying. The next morning my friend went to see their GP and then eventually a psychologist and psychiatrist and they’re doing a lot better now, but I still check in daily and make sure to make plans once a week etc etc because I love this person and would do anything for them.
Thank you for posting this. An old friend took his life less than 2 weeks ago after dealing with some difficult things from social media. I'm close with his family and it really rocked their whole world.
RIP Alec Holowka
Jeff Tease so sorry that happened 😿. Kati has a great video that may help with this: ruclips.net/video/Tj8DXLnURZE/видео.html
yesssss i did a mental health awareness workshop yesterday
This is a video I really could have used when I was younger 💗 thank you! Wish all the best to the people out there who try to help other people, it can be really difficult sometimes so always remember to check in with your self first if ur doing okay before u try to help others. Dont burn yourself by trying to make other people stay warm
Kati you deserve a massive raise!
I volunteer for the crisis text line. It is the most rewarding and challenging thing I do. It is hard to listen during someone's dark times, but I am happy to be an ear, or well eyes for them.
This is brilliant. So many lives can be saved by heeding the advice of this video. It's sensitive and level-headed. Great work, Kati!
Awe thanks Patrick!! So glad you liked the video!! xoxo
We definitely need more people like you Kati. Your video is amazing and I already told so many people about your channel because everyone should know about stuff like this! It's important.❤
Awe thanks Yuni!!! xoxo
Thank you for this video. I shared it to Facebook because people need to learn how to properly handle the tough conversations. Love your videos. 💜
Thank you for making this video Kati. There is NOT enough funding. I've called local hotlines while in distress and the people I spoke to were literally zero help. I got off the phone feeling worse last time. I was shocked and dismayed at how unprepared these services are!
this video is amazing and on point. while at my lowest and surprisingly reaching out to someone for support the last thing I want is to be invalidated. i’m not asking you to fix me - i’m asking for someone to listen. the few times ive reached out to someone has been when i’m not safe to be alone. all i need is the company and some love.
Thank you for making this, Kati.
Yes and yes again about sticking with the person. I had so many friends who stopped asking how I was and if I wanted to do something with them, mainly because I had my depression and cancelled because, well, I was suicidal. I didn’t have anyone who kept even asking how I slept or how I was, even though they know about my background. It really did make it worse. Just asking how someone is helps a lot. Being noticed helps a lot.
Alexis Stenar how are you doing? ❤️
Thank you Kati. I often times wonder how people perceive me, knowing that I feel this way often times. I want so bad to get out of this depression, but my efforts to better myself is taking its toll on me. I am so tired and fatigued now. Being 44 and dealing with this is something that I never imagined happening in my lifetime. But here I am. Thank you for all that you do. It helps.
I feel like you read my mind! My sister has BPD and I always resort to your videos on BPD. Well she just attempted.... thank you for these videos. They help me try to understand
Thank you for this video! I know that this hotline helps so many people! I am aware I've never called but I knew threw a few friends that they can help.
Sending soo so so much love and support to every single person
Thank You!
Thanks for this Kati! Since my husband killed himself in 2017... I've been struggling talking to my one friend who is in my opinion very suicidal
I’m so sorry for your loss and the legacy it’s left behind for you. You are important too - please don’t forget to look after yourself. I hope your friend will be able to access the help he/she/they need xx
I'm sorry, I know the grief suicide leaves behind... It's totally different than when someone dies any other way and it sucks! My dad committed suicide in 2017 too... Right before Christmas. I saw him the day before too - the last person in his family to see him and the last person to tell him I loved him, the last person he said he loved. Sometimes that memory makes me feel better and sometimes it rips me apart all over again. I wish I'd seen this video before it happened but idk if it would have made a difference anyway without having all of the knowledge and wisdom I've gained from experiencing losing someone you never thought you'd have to life without to suicide. Anyway, I feel you and I know how it much it hurts. Also, after he died A LOT of people opened up to me for some reason and told me that they sometimes struggled with suicidal thoughts so maybe just talking genuinely about your husband and how he died with no pressure on them to add to conversation will get your friend to open up.
It's a great "coffee and a chat" topic.
If you have just one person who can be there for you; whether a mental health team member, or a friend/ family member. I agree that it can definitely lessen the pain and isolation from the darkness of how suicidality can affect ourselves.
Staying in the present moment and reminding ourselves as well, "I have thoughts..but I am not my thoughts " is also important.
We are the rulers of ourselves as you mentioned in your video.
Thanks for your amazing advice as always Kati. 💛💛💖🙌
This video was really helpful. As more and more of us come to terms with our depression and anxiety, I find that these conversations are becoming more common. While a lot of your videos help those of us who are struggling with our own feelings, I also appreciate any advice on how to be a friend and supporter to somebody else who is struggling. Thanks, Kati!
Hey, Kati!! I am a crisis counselor for Crisis Text Line so THANK YOU for supporting them!!! You rock!!!
Thank YOU for your dedication and work. You're making a difference 💜
Allison, come join us!! It’s a great place to volunteer and we always need more CCs!!
@@jennprichard3943 i would love to someday! As soon as i get myself together enough to stop using the line myself 💜
Allison, I totally get that!! Keep us in mind and when you feel ready come on over!!
I volunteered for crisis text line when working for my undergraduate in psychology. Now in my Masters for Mental Health counseling while working as a recovery counselor for those struggling with addiction!
Watching your videos on how to help loved one with depression or suicidal. My boyfriend of 2 years is currently going through a really rough time and I’m struggling to help him through it. I get stressed myself and I want to stop and take care of myself but I feel if I do that I won’t really be helping him and he will try to start taking my stress on and try to make me feel better. I really need these videos right now. And I’m glad you’ve made these for people going through it ❤️
Thank you, so so much for this video! I agree with EVERY point and piece of advice. While I was going through my own struggles with depression, thoughts of suicide, and self harming behaviors, I had many people trying to be supportive. Some did a great job, some did okay but were obviously unsure of how to be supportive, and one actually made things worse with her good intentions but lack of understanding and need to fix me. I'm sharing this video on social media and saving it for quick reference. Because I'm open about my own experiences, people often ask me for advice on how to help a loved one, I always give them advice similar to this video... now, I have an excellent quick reference to share with them. Thank you, so much.
Yes i am female & here is my suicidal *true?* poem:
The memories hurt
The scars hurt more
I don't know what it's like
To drop dead on the floor.
Locking the door.
Grabbing the noose
Making it tied.
This small girl,
Is about to die.
Roses are red
My bruises are bleeding
The only sound at night
Is the sound of me weeping.
I fake at day
I cry at night
The people say
That I should go *die.*
Maybe I should follow?
Maybe I should not.
But that Is up to you.
Cause I cannot decide
Whether I should -live- or *not..*
*Should I Stay or Should I go?*
*I've forgotten how to tell..*
*Did I ever even know?*
Thank you. I have a lot of my friends come to me to talk and this really helps. 🌹Have a lovely rest of your day.
I feel rude for not saying this in my previous comment. Thank you so much for doing this, we must find ways to help others and ourselves carve the future.
Thanks Kati I really needed to see this. I Have a loved going through something and I would like to help. So this video is a great start.
Thank you so much for sharing this! It is amazing! The only thing I have to add is: try not to be apprehensive when discussing suicide with loved ones. Suicidal ideations are a NORMAL reaction for all life throws at us. Help your loved ones know that their feelings are valid and normal. I’m currently a grad student in pursuit of a counseling degree and that is one thing my professor said that felt really profound.
Great video I have been waiting on this one for a few years, thank you. Would a video about how suicidal individuals should talk to loved ones about it be a good episode, I would enjoy it. Thanks again.
A friend of mine confided in me of her suicide plan. This was after she told her therapist. I told her she was very brave to share that. We talked about each other's similar issues and yes we know we are responsible for our own recovery journey. As horrible as it sounds, it's nice to know we are not alone and we can support each other.
It was crazy that about a year ago I was pretty suicidal, and I was always trying to just push it down and be there for everyone else still. Once I had a breakdown and let my boyfriend know I was feeling that way, it was then that those feelings finally dissipated. I felt like a new person after all of that burden was off of my shoulders.
I hope You’re getting the help you need! You deserve all the love in the world💗💗
Love this! Shared on my FB page for this week! Thank you!
Awe thank you so so much!! xoxo That's so helpful :)
this has been super helpful, i have a few suicidal friends and i'd like to think that maybe i've saved them. i've just wanted to make sure i was doing it right and not accidentally invalidating them. this video should be watched by everyone
Katie I sent this to my mom. She's awful to me and I hope this helps her see me.
Thank you.
how are you doing?
This video is really helpful.
I myself have suicidal thoughts.
Some people may already know that I’ve had depression sense 2013.
My suicidal thoughts got worse sense before my surgery in January I I haven’t really recovered from that.
I love how you let others know how they can help, because speaking from experience.... it’s not easy to reach out.
IAmWhatICreate1999 so sorry ur going through this 😿 ck out Kati’s video on suicidal thoughts ruclips.net/video/6n3XEbloPRI/видео.html
TK thank you love, but don’t be sorry.
I’ve been dealing with this for a long time. Recent events made them bad again but I know that I do need to get help.
Thanks for the video, I’ve seen this one but it definitely won’t hurt to watch again. ❤️❤️
Thanks Kati, really helpful vid! I think one of my friends needs support and this has inspired me to reach out, now that I know how to. I find that listening to other people vent about similar things I’m going through makes me feel better too:)
James Bendall ❤️
Kind of amusing to see this pop up in my feed on the day I started a hunger strike.
Why did you start a hunger strike?
This is an amazing topic! Thank you Kati.
These are really good tips, Kati. I really appreciate you talking about this topic. You are an amazing human being and what you do is just beyond words 💗💗
Last Autumn, I was suicidal for months. I had to stay in the hospital twice (well, 2 different hospitals once). I can say with near certainty that yes, trying to fix such a feeling, such a horrible experience can become detrimental, but we must always attempt to make a goal for the future, be it near or far, to live a happier life. Personally, I'd believe that to be a final goal for any treatment.
Glad you did a video on this one kati
I've used the crisis text line several times, the ability to text rather than having to talk in those really hard moments was extremely helpful. I wish I had had a friend to talk to but I had isolated for to long, I didn't have anyone left.... Love everything you said though, it would have been extremely helpful if someone had done those things interacting with me....
Wonderful video, Kati! I would say Boundaries are a really important part of this (as someone who went through it with a friend last year). Be realistic with what you can offer them in order to take care of yourself too. Don't promise them that you will be available 24/7 if that's not something you can actually deliver on. I made check in points ("I'm going to check in on you tomorrow around noon, is that okay?") and then made sure to be really consistent with them. It helped both of us by being really clear about what I could deliver on, while still caring for my own physical/mental health!
Jocelyn Steele Lane thanks for the great tips!
Thank you Kati. This video is helping me to listen to my partner right now.
Such an important discussion!! Shared on facebook in Australia!!:) please do more videos on suicide prevention:)!
Thank you Kati for everything❤️you always have the right video at the right time:)
Awe of course! so happy to be a helpful resource :) xoxo
I wish I had this when I was sucidal in my teenage years.
Laura Gadille ditto
Well done Kati you covered this very well - I will be showing your clip to some young people who are attending some Suicide Prevention Training
U explained this very well and very realistically. This rly helped me alot to know what to do thank u so much.
Im really happy to see this because almost my friends are experiencing depression and Im the only one that doesnt so I reallg want to help them jn every way I can. Now I know what to do and what not to do when communicating with them. Thank youu so much Kat!!
Thank youuuu, this was rlly helpful
thanks for this
I've felt that talking to and being with someone who's suicidal or in a crisis can feel like being with my thoughts/obsessions during meditation: you notice (listen) them but don't engage (fix) with them. And I always try to remember, am I really making them feel uncomfortable by asking? or am I just feeling uncomfortable asking? This isn't your conversation, it's theirs, and if you need to talk to someone, you can find someone for yourself!
Thank You Katie ! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Thank you so much for sharing this content of yours and for putting together such an informative snippet on the topic. At first, when I saw the notification, I thought you would be conversing with a suicidal person, which I also valued hearing, and was pleasantly surprised by what you presented.💫 I wish I could send this video to my loved ones without feeling like I might possibly get smack (along with some stigma from family) though I will share it as a mass post on my Twitter and wherever else I feel I can. I aim to spread the message that none of us are or should [have to] feel alone, though that phrase & concept can get a bit ironic when you can feel alone yourself too. Besides therapy, I am going to have to find whatever support system can work for me and that I won’t have to worry about burdening, per se. Thank you so much again, Kati!❣️😇🧠
Riddhi Dhanik Kati already has a great video on that! ruclips.net/video/6n3XEbloPRI/видео.html
I have to say this has been the best video I have seen on this subject.
“You are not responsable for another persons mental health”
My mother is 86 years old and has been on a slow suicide in that she just stays in bed and eats very little.
When I visit her I have to say I have never seen her more peaceful in my entire life.
“Take care of yourself”
So true when she first started going downhill (she is married so she is not alone) 9 months ago my husband and I offered to move in to take care of them. They both said No.
Now when I visit she is basically saying goodbye to me. At this point I have tried everything and both my husband and I are emotionally physically drained.
I have reached a point of conflict because I always believed in a person who has a terminal sickness has the right to choose how to die.
She is 86 years old and her husband has Cancer.
Thanks again Kati. :D
I told my sister if she knew I went to a therapist for a while and she opened up about going to a therapist herself. I asked why, she said suicidal thoughts and depression. I had not clue. We cried together and talked for a long time and honestly that was such a break through moment. Now I make sure to check in on her often, let her vent, spend more time with her... What I learned from this video is to not try to fix it, I'm such a fixer and tend to give unsolicited advice but I should stop doing that and just listen more.
Thanks for making this. Most people give me the attitude of "sucks to be you" when I open up about feeling suicidal. They don't want to hear it and tell me to shut up and that it's not really that bad. It's very invalidating and makes me want to do it even more because then I beat myself up for making them uncomfortable. Like I get if you don't want to hear it. Tell me respectfully that you aren't the right person to help me, but then also don't ask what's wrong with me of you notice I'm down if you aren't prepared for the truth. It just feels fake when someone acts like they care, but they end up making me feel worse.
It's not your responsibility to keep them comfortable. You're right. If they can't handle it, they shouldn't ask. If they are invalidating your feelings, it's better for you I think to not tell them. But keep trying to find people who won't do that. They do exist and are so helpful to have.
I was in 1 situation like this. A friend of mine was thinking of committing suicide and im bad at talking people out of a situation like this. Overall I saved them from doing it, but having the right resources would of been so helpful. I'll bookmark and save. Thanks for creating this video
I have depression myself but this story isn’t about me. My best friend has been cutting for 3 years it had really started slowing down and she stopped and I was happy we had these check in calls because we live 23 miles away and don’t see each other a lot but a little while ago her step brother started telling everybody he knew that she was Suicidal that night she relapsed 10 deep cuts she called me after because she was going to cut more and knew she shouldn’t but the temptation was really strong I admit I was Pissed I kinda went off after I was calm again I told her I was sorry and that it wasn’t her I was mad at and that I wasn’t mad at her nobody but me had known she was and had ever cut I convinced her tell someone I know it was had for her to do but she hasn’t cut in a little while now and I’m really proud of how far she’s come and I want you the person reading this to know that you are worth it and that whatever your going threw it will get better it may not seem like it but it will