Because the mom refused to acknowledged her ocd, thinking her hisband wouldn't love her anymore. That irrational fear is the foundation of her child misdiagnosis.
@@snowyconfession The mother's fear is not so irrational, I mean, not everyone would be willing to understand a person with such a condition, but she still should have put her child's wellbeing first.
They'd rather listen to famous doctor than a random doctor in a hospital. People that cause misinformation like that should be locked up. It only damages the sheep of America
@@geographylover6028 Caring meant accepting that what the "kids in school" say and how they stare doesn't determine who his son is. Most importantly caring meant that his son was different and special but he was just that, His son.
@Chinenyenwa Mecha caring also means trying to make sure your child has the best life possible and not ignoring things that lead to bullying, social stigmas, and ultimately a worse life.
People who can't handle "different" shouldn't be allowed to have kids. Being some version of abnormal is just part of being human, so the parents should do the human thing and adapt.
Easier said then done. You say adapting is a human thing but it's generally the opposite. Humans hate dealing with changes or anything that is outside their "norm." Seeing how the parents treated their kid is normal and common. Sad, but true..
Eh, lots of neurological conditions can be legitimately life-limiting. Tics and OCD can be really quite unpleasant to live with - if they can be treated, they should be. Obviously in this video the parents are over the top, the treatment is bogus and they have skewed priorities, but a lot of neurodiversity rhetoric goes way too far in treating all neurological conditions as if they just 'differences'.
I don’t think the dad is mad that she had OCD, I think he’s upset that she went along with unnecessary treatments for their son and put him through this when she new better
I do think you're probably right, maybe the actor is bad, or the direction was bad, or the person who titled this video was bad.. because there certainly wasn't enough to say he was mad or rejected the Idea of OCD being a thing.
Maybe. At the same time he was aware his son needed surgery for something possibly life threatning and he stalled it because that surgery MAY affect the boys tics.. like ..priorities dude.
I think we're not trying to understand this young woman. She's probably believing that her life is better off the way it is without having to deal with her tics, she is trying to be protective just doing it very wrongly, if her husband finds out she has tics he would likely leave her and if you observe from the chemistry between them she really wants her husband maybe not as much as he wants her. This is just my opinion but, we all deal with stress and strain differently she just doesn't want her son to have any reason to feel the way she felt when she was younger. Although her decision might kill him, in her mind he is a better child without the tics.
i don’t think it was about him having some prejudice. the way mental illnesses especially something like OCD are stigmatized causes a lot of people to feel ashamed for having them even if it’s out of their control. unfortunately the world we live in treats people with mental illness as less than or weak.
It also sounds like she has a lot of trauma. Many failed relationships where her not being "normal" cost her people she loved. After years of that you would do anything to pretend to be perfect. Does that justify hurting her son? No. But the Dad walking away like that just proved her worst fears right.
@@curelightchild He walked away because she'd been lying to him about their sons health. 🙄 I would've done the same thing. She made that poor boy go to God knows how many unnecessary doctors visits, and made him take pills he didn't need.
It’s hard to believe that people could actually be like this… it’s shameful that some parents could say they love their kids and then act like this. I’m grateful for mine.
As someone who grew up with a parent who was convinced that my OCD, Depression and Anxiety had to be "something else" because my little sister didn't have it, unfortunately, yes this is does happen in real life.
As an autistic person, I am infuriated. If I ever have kids and if any of them are neurodivergent, which is very likely considering how many neurodivergent there are in my family, I will not force them to change themselves. I will just love them and say "Yeah, kiddo, same here, no worries."
My daughter is Autistic and I love her to bits. She has the most unique qualities and moments. My inlaws, tho...? They started blaming my husband for her being defective and calling him the same. We don't talk to them anymore.
I’d be furious if my parents wanted me to be “normal.” My mom told me before that I’m not normal since I’m autistic & my dad is also autistic & he wants to deny his autism since he got a late diagnosis when he was being medically discharged from the military at the time
@@kimberlybellard6972 we don't even talk about my daughter's diagnosis. We're a family of weirdos and if people can't accept that, it's their hang up. Maybe your dad wasn't ready to leave the military. If I had my dream job and was happy doing it, I'd be pretty upset, too.
Once had a teacher who refused to believe i am Autisstic. She thought i was a crybaby and told me to behave normally. But i can't do that. I can't behave normal. It's simply a part of my personality.
Why would the mom need to admit she has OCD for her son to be diagnosed with it, or even be suspected of having it? Lots of people have OCD without either parent having it. And him having tics could be a separate tic disorder.
It's more that she needed to admit that she knew it wasn't pandas. That she was certain it wasn't caused by meningitis because it was more likely that is was just ocd with strong genetic factors.
They wanted her to admit it so they would allow them to treat him properly. The whole reason they didn't is because they believed the other doctors diagnosis of PANDAS. So that's really the reason they wanted her to admit it.
they needed her to admit that she has it so that the doctors could see if some of the issues her son was having could be from genetically inherited OCD, which would therefore allow them to treat him properly. They also generally like to or need to have a patient’s medical history on file in order to save time on future exams, diagnoses, and prescriptions, but that’s a bit of a side bit compared to the other stuff.
When I was in elementary school, my teachers highly suggested that I be evaluated for autism. But for some reason, my mum was *absolutely* certain that I was fine. She refused any tests or therapists, and to this day, I haven't been evaluated. Going on 21, gonna just do it myself. No idea why she was so against it, she wouldn't even let my dad do it for her-
Make sure to do it as soon as possible. Many doctors and treatment programs stop testing for or treating autism at 21 years old or 25 years old. I didn't realize that I had autism until I was 22, and aged out of all free testing options. The tests were only offered by one doctor in my area and were so expensive we couldn't afford them. Now I'm older than 25 and can't get treatment locally even if I take the test. Don't miss your chance to get help.
Some parents want “perfect” kids. Nobody is perfect. I have two special needs siblings that my parents have sacrificed everything for and even advocated for.
same here. I have a sneaking suspicion I might have autism or some mental health thing. but my parents (adoptive) keep denying it over and over again. once I am old enough, I'm gonna go check for myself.
@@Swhitmo1 there is not much of a treatment for autism though. Some therapies, but... I dunno, I don't even seek diagnosis. I went for ADHD diagnosis since that one actually has meds that help.
They have an agenda to drug up people with autism. Glad, your parents dodged the bullet. The drugs they offer cause just additional harm. You need to adjust your life accordingly and learn to accept yourself with your maybe disadvantages and ride on the advantages that autism has to offer. Greetings from an Aspie.
The fact that they think that those "ticks" are a higher priority tells me that they either are stupid, or that they care far more about themselves and their perception than their son's health. Either way, I personally have no idea what it is like to live with OCD, but these people shouldn't even be parents, if they much rather literally poison their son than accept that he is different.
OCD is pretty much a death sentence if not treated. Like all anxiety disorders, it gets worse with time. OCD runs in my family and I didn't get skipped. A childs suffering is the cost of a parents denial
@@Cupcakes76 Like with most conditions OCD lies on a fairly broad scale and it certainly isn't a death sentence if ignored. Especially if it has run in the family for generations like mine it is entirely possible that you learn to cope with it without any of you even identifying it as OCD. Its no coincidence that many of my family "traditions" are effectively just CBT and exposure therapy.
@@Cupcakes76 As someone with OCD, I can assure you it's not a death sentence. Yes, it is an anxiety disorder, but if your case is mild enough, it can be handled and you can learn to live with it. There are many who have a severe enough case of it that it can seriously mess up their life and they need constant therapy and medication to get by. But not everyone with it is like that. However, even if you didn't need help with it as a kid, (like I didn't), as you grow older and life gets more stressful, it can worsen to the point of needing to seek out help. Mine has begun to worsen due to several stressful events in my life over the past 5 years, and now it really affects my life in an increasingly negative way. However I've begun to learn to manage it and I'm actually doing quite well despite how different it is now than it used to be. I don't even need medication. There's also a couple different versions of OCD. There's the version most people have that everyone thinks about when they think of OCD, and then there's one referred to as "just right" OCD, or sometimes "incomplete" OCD. This is the version I have. I don't have horrible thoughts telling me if I don't do something pointless my house will burn down. I just get an overwhelming feeling that something isn't right and I have to perform pointless compulsions to fix it. Sometimes "fixing" it will take seconds, sometimes I'll repeat the compulsive action 1,000 times until I "feel" like its right. Excessive hand washing usually falls into this OCD variation, but can also fall into the regular one. And yes, excessive hand washing is a thing for me. I just don't feel right if I've only washed once. It has to be 3 or more times. It doesn't destroy my life, and I'm certainly not dying young because of it, but it can be quite annoying. Especially when I'm running late to work and I can't leave until I've backed down the alley 20 times making sure the garage door did actually close and I didn't imagine it. Many neurodivergencies function differently person to person. You can't say just because your experience is one way that everyone else with the same neurological issue will be the same way. Knowing what it's like for me, I can imagine how bad it is for you if you believe it's a death sentence if untreated, and I'm terribly sorry you have to live like that. But please speak from your own experience instead of labeling all of us as the exact same. However, I will agree that if a person's situation gets bad enough without them knowing what's going on, it may begin to drive them crazy, especially if intrusive thoughts are involved as they often are with OCD. This could possibly lead to suicidal tendencies. There's also the possibility that the disorder itself could lead to a person developing some rather negative or detrimental compulsions that could cause physical and/or mental damage over time. That is a possibility (I used to make my pain "even", so like if I hit my shin while stepping into the shower, I'd hit the other shin until it hurt just as bad. Glad I was able to nip that in the bud once I realized it was a serious issue). But it's rare for OCD to get to that point or anywhere near that point without someone noticing, whether or not they're even aware the person is suffering from OCD. It's nearly impossible for a person, especially a child, to be suffering from a case of OCD severe enough to have become life-threatening without themselves or someone else noticing there's a problem. So it most likely will not remain untreated till the point of dying from it. So if that's what you meant, I understand, but it's not super likely. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. Have a lovely day/night. Edit: I added the last paragraph about possible negative stuff that could but probably won't lead to death.
Living with OCD is terrible I spend nights climbing in and out of my bed and I can't stop it's like a never ending pattern but I can't stop I'm afraid that something might happen. I have things I refuse to do and I repeat certain things it's made me an outcast in school. OCD is like being in a cycle that u can't escape.
As someone who lives with ocd daily, the disorder itself does not kill you. But, if it’s not properly treated, it can make your life a nightmare. There are times when the effects of it can be fatal (such as suicidal thoughts or lifelong physical health problems). But, if it’s treated, you can manage it and have a good life.
Actually, I would guess she carries selfish pride and couldn’t handle not being accepted. She just has a flawed viewpoint, because when you’re healing, you realize you want honesty in a relationship. This action isn’t caused by love for her husband or child.
I have OCD and anxiety and depression inherited from both of my parents. And my brother has it to . there's no shame in mental health. Sending love and positive thoughts to everyone out there who's struggling with mental health 🙌
@@melodycamrucco9211 obsessive compulsive disorder, also classified as an anxiety disorder that causes obsessive, intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors that temporarily calms irrational behaviors and fears down
That look the husband gives towards the end when she admits everything really is a masterfully done scathing look that sums his emotions up nicely: "You didn't trust me, the person you married and concieved a child with, with something important that not only has endangered the life of our child, but it was done on the premise that you thought I wouldnt love you. I am betrayed by the vert notion. This is single handedly the most selfish thing I've seen you do and need to reconcile my thoughts and feelings of how to proceed." Its not the fact she has OCD or that she gave their son OCD, its the fact she was willing to risk the life of their child for a superficial lie.
Based on how that guy was he 100% would have married someone else instead of her if he knew. Honestly her fear is probably factual but that doesnt make it less selfish since she added a child to the mix. Just saying her reason had merit because based on that guy's reactions he would rather go for a 'normal' wife so he could have higher chance of 'normal' kids. Again doesn't excuse her actions merely explains them
Mmmm yeah no I don't think the guy who said "kids are starting to stare" truly cares. Dude literally prioritized keeping the harmless tics in check over his son's bloodflow-cut bowels. Douche is a textbook closet ableist. The wife submitting herself to this relationship in fear she'd be alone due to stigma was no better.
@@JDog2656when they abuse their son by giving him unnecessary medicine for a year to the point he needs parts of his intestines removed you certainly can judge them.
In reality, a mother that hid that kind of a condition from her husband for a decade would NEVER admit to having OCD. She would deny it all the way to her son’s funeral.
My family blamed my long labor and me for my daughter’s developmental delays. Finally at age 11 we got an answer it was genetic. So vindicated!! I have several neurodivergent children biological and step and love them all.
@@karenashton5053 I am sorry but that is unfair. A C-section is invasive surgery,so it is a big decision to do it. For thousands of years it wasn’t an option. In fact you would have probably died in a previous century, and even today if you were giving birth in many poorer countries. I am sorry as it really isn’t my business, but I feel somewhat outraged for your family to criticise or make you feel guilty for a having to make a difficult choice, especially after you had had a long and painful labour. Then for your child to have special needs. I think you must be a very strong person to have got through it all and to be a good parent. Well done you.
@@brontewcat thank you so much. Its been 34 years so I’m not as outraged. It was unfair to me and my daughter. But she has done well even with a genetic disorder.
As an functioning autistic I understand some don’t want face reality or don’t want want admit they gave child a incurable condition to avoid the guilt and blame on something else ‘the first stage of grief is denial
I'm high functioning on the Spectrum, previously diagnosed as Asperger's. I was so high functioning that my parents didn't notice until 6th grade, when I got tested. My Mom has felt guilty ever since, blaming herself for not getting me tested sooner. She's a wonderful mother, but she can't accept my assurance as anything better than biased.
I wasn't diagnosed until I was nearly 50. My mom refuses to believe me because as a female, I'm considered high functioning. Her own bias refuses to allow her to acknowledge my reality. It's sad for her. I'm fine. In fact, way better now that I understand why I am the way I am. ✨
Like you op I'm a high functioning autistic person with Asperger's I was diagnosed with it at 5 or 6 don't remember but my now fiancé has signs of autism that she thinks is normal she doesn't like certain materials, certain shapes of food, etc she wants to get tested and I'll support her but her mother on the other hand doesnt want her to get tested (she's the middle child between the older with ADHD and the youngest who has some minor birth defects) which I find very strange my mum and dad where good with me being autistic to an extent they're a bit old fashioned mum was the one who spotted it even being a new mom so I don't see why she would favour her other two children with disabilities over her middle child that may or may not have a disability just seems strange
I've had OCD and a few other things probably (never got tested), but man if it can help your mom then show her this. I'm an artist and a few months ago some of the products I was using caused a skin infection, my skin is pretty beat up from the amount of hand washing I do. Dermatologist was asking questions so I told him, I wash my hands a lot. He says that's OCD, you shouldn't do that. (I understand he's not a psychologist but still, that's kinda insensitive to say to someone with OCD.) Anyways, my mom was with me and when we left, she told me to never mention my condition to anyone ever again. She knows but she cares more about her and the family's image. I was 23 when that happened. I was 21 when I told her I had issues, she never thought to get me tested. Your mom did a great job getting you tested and accepting you the way you are. She's an amazing parent. Your parents noticed, my parents still don't accept it after being told by a doctor.
All it took for my dad to be around an autistic woman to understand that it's what I had. We spent a long night talking about how he understood now and was beyond sorry. My mom is a different story. She didn't let me go to therapy until I was 18 when she found one of my journals and read it and realized I was right at the cliff's edge. But even now she doesn't want to say I have autism, she says "you have Asperger's" 🙄. My thoughts when she says that: Woman that's a high functioning form of AUTISM!
I'm sorry you had to deal with bad parents. You're not the only one. There are some other people who have bad parents who don't understand their children's disorders, mental illnesses, etc.
@@callanightshade8079I hate how therapy is so stigmatised. It's really not what people think it is. It's like sometimes when you go to religious leaders or gurus for advice when you discuss your problems with them, except therapists go a step further and dedicate a great deal of their time into helping you navigate through your problems over many hours and days, and help YOU come to effective conclusions about your suffering.
I had PANDAS when I was nine and developed tic disorders from it. This poor kid didn't need to be on antibiotics for so long. I still have my tics and I'm 21 now. The antibiotics are to treat the strep infection causing the PANDAS, not the tics. The parents are just as much to blame as the doctor. Doing something therapeutic or focusing like music or sports can help tics decrease and there are therapies you can do to help decrease them. Even other medications like non-stimulants could help decrease tics. There were other things they could've done before putting him on a serious panel of long-term antibiotics.
I had pandas too when I was younger because of the flu, I know I had tics but I repressed most of that time in my life. The treatment is so taxing, both for the body and the mind. Putting him through that for something like OCD is horrible
The Mom didn't tell the Dad about it being OCD because she thought he wouldn't love her. That tells me that she already had someone or someone's in her life who already that blamed her and didn't accept her or her condition. It's genetic, so probably her own family. She then hid it and continued to hide it when treating her son. It doesn't make the bs she put her son went through right, because she should have spoke up.
It's unbelievable the attitudes some people still have toward neurodivergents, especially children. Though honestly, I don't think the husband felt betrayed because of the OCD, I think he felt betrayed because the wife lied to him and willfully put their son through things he never needed to keep up the lie. Not to mention from realizing how shallow she must think he is if she believed he'd leave her for something like that.
My husband has ADHD and so does my brother. I have a communication disorder that makes me stutter as well as ADD. I know there's almost a definite possibility that my kids will have it too. I will never turn away from them like those parents did.
My son has autism and has good days some bad days with behavior and trouble with communication. Over time I've learned how understand and get him to understand. Some of my own family say, "I don't know how you do it." "I couldn't handle dealing with him." ECT. Everytime I tell them he is the way he is meant to be. I will do anything help him make it in this world and over come anything that comes his way.
I can’t believe this. I suffer from anxiety and depression, and am currently trying to figure out if I have OCD. My parents didn’t believe me either, and it took my dragging them to my doctor for a diagnosis to get them to realize I wasn’t making it up. Parents who do this to their children only make their mental states worse. Don’t worry about what other people think, get your child help!
@@scottlally8374 OCD means obsessive compulsive disorder. It basically means that one part of your brain tells you something has to be perfect at a certain time, and you’ll think if you don’t do it something bad will happen.
Yea but this wasnt about the son it was about the mom. She didnt want to accept her diagnosis..she didnt tell her husband so he went along with the PANDAS theory especially after a doctor co signed it. Some people have such a hard time accepting themselves that they also cant accept when they see themselves in their kids.
@@emiereardon4618OCD is not actually just making things perfect. It's mainly about your mind controlling you. Uncontrollable thought/ intrusive thoughts.
i was diagnosed with PANDAS in third grade and i am so grateful that i got the support i needed from my family. i get told probably 3 times a week that PANDAS isn't real and it hurts me to watch this video knowing that his own parents don't accept him.
I really suffered with o.c.d. when I was younger,my parents used to go mad in me for it, made me a thousand times worse. Some people shouldn't be allowed to have kids. I'm in my 30's now and funnily enough I brought up my O.C.D today I went through as a child and my mother just got annoyed and nasty
Yeah, I am 17 currently, and when telling my mom that I think I have adhd, and possibly dyslexia (though maybe it could just be me not realizing that it's just adhd, so I wanna test those theories out more) and made some excuses on why I couldn't have it. 1. Teachers would have diagnosed me with it (they legally can't diagnose you with adhd, can with dyslexia, plus I think they might have at one point tried to tell my mom that something was wrong with me, but she made excuses then too) 2. I didn't act the same as my two very hyperactive 7 year old cousins. For the dyslexia she just complained about how she thinks she has it (same type that I think I might have) and how she wishes they diagnosed her in school because she would have probably done so much better and maybe even gone to college, proceeded to say nothing and do nothing about me saying I might have it.
This is why I’m scared to be with someone, I’m diagnosed with ADHD and a a bit of OCD, all from my dad. My first relationship I had, my boyfriend didn’t want to deal with my issues and left me once he found out. The other one used me as he wanted people to see him as a good person who’d date someone no matter what’s wrong with them and behind closed doors gets upset when I over clean or forget or move too much at home.
OCD,ADHD,AUTISIM ETC. I get these things are diffrent and something people and peers understand but its sadly a difficulty that people deal with we dont notice these since it a day to day life, its just a reaction that we just have. The best option to do is to just figure out what kind of reactions we have rather than seeing it as a social problem,depending on the reaction, parents should just be patient because to be told you have these issues is difficult enough
I have adhd pretty bad with needing to shake my leg,tap on something, anything to control it and im always hated on by my moms boyfriend because he hates it and "can control his so why cant i?" Type of attitude towards me
My son was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 5 years old but he outgrew it when he got into high school the Dr taken him off all his meds. He fine now.every now and then he gets a little bit overwhelmed with stuff but he’s handling everything well.
@@deathringer1003 offer to go help your mum with shopping then explain , in the car, I want to spend time with you while we're still together- I'm happy that having a boyfriend makes you happy but he has to stop criticizing me or I'll look to living rlsewhwre- can you ask him to back off and explain I can't help. It????
The fact the dad was so adamant but when he learned the truth he immediately is horrified is actually quite heartwarming. He genuinely loves his son and thought it was best for him. Sometimes crap like this is just misinformation, sometimes people can be taught better
I've had OCD/Asperger's for as long as I can remember. Made me a prime target for bullying and made my parents think that there's something wrong with me, thus I had to take Ritalin for two and half years. They stopped once they realized it was doing more harm than good, at which point my Mom and grandparents tried to learn more about my tics (walking in circles, walking back and forth, washing my hands a lot, and a couple others that I stopped doing years ago, naturally). My Dad and big Sis took longer to wrap their heads around why, but they're cool, now, with who and how I am.
This episode is horrible. I have PANDAS and it is absolutely real. It took forever to find a dr who knew what is was and I was misdiagnosed before being correctly diagnosed and able to start treatment that worked.
As a person who struggled with undiagnosed OCD for most of my life, this makes me angry. If I had known I had OCD earlier in my life, I could have been able to manage the anxiety and compulsions way earlier. The fact that this could have happened to this child just because his mom doesn't want to admit he has this disorder infuriates me. He could have ended up like me, an adult who's just now getting help for OCD
watching this as someone with OCD and Tourette syndrome was so upsetting to see parents that respond like this. OCD runs in my family on my mom’s side and she is the type to really want to keep appearances. I’m the first in the line to develop tics and i’m really grateful she was willing to accept my diagnoses when my tics got very bad.
I used to wash my hands around 75-100 times a day as a kid. I had a bunch of other ticks as well, and usually never knew I was even doing them. My parents never understood it and they’d scold me for it. My dad would go ballistic over my ticks. Told me it was all in my head and to just be a man and get over it. That’s the worse thing you can say to someone with ocd. It’s no joke.
i mean it is technically 'all in your head' but it doesnt help, from what i know its a controlling condition that restricts you and more people should take it seriously
I agree. But it’s pretty much uncontrollable. I’m not a psychiatrist so I wouldn’t know how to explain the ticks to someone who doesn’t have it. I think kids with it have worse ticks than adults, because you slowly grow out of some ticks with age, or at least don’t let it bother you as much. It gets tiring the older you get. I’ve progressed a lot over the last ten years. It’s still there, just not as bad.
As someone with handwashing OCD, 75-100 is insane. I stopped keeping count of how many times I did it, but I know I never did it that much…I hope you’re better now
I have a mom like her. I have epilepsy. My mom ignored my invisible seizures for the first 18 years of my life passing them off as bad behavior and some of them as good behavior. Bad behavior: Staring at the wall, bad memory; Good behavior: being very quiet and having random spurts of energy (like some one shot me with adrenaline). She tried to manage it, being a nurse and all, but never could and so passed it off as me acting purposely. I will say she honestly had no clue I had a condition; but I also know if I never had a convulsive seizure, she would have continued to blame me to this day. My brain damage is horrendous. It’s to the point the doctors have recommended excises for the elderly. I must wear memory bracelets with my address so I don’t forget etc. I’m only 28 years old
On one hand, the bigger one here, it's actuallty nice to see PANDAS talked about. A lot of irl people get scoffed at or ignored b/c its so hard to diagnose appropriately but it is a devastating disorder.
I was diagnosed with OCD when I was in high school, but until I was officially diagnosed by the family doctor, my mother refused to believe me when I told her my suspicions. She believed a person could only have OCD with their hands and be obsessively clean. I always had to wash my hands, but after puberty, I struggled with keeping my room clean. My OCD has changed drastically over the years, and I struggle with taking medication and finding the right therapist. It started with cracked, bleeding hands from excessive hand washing and not being able to tough my clothes if I was wearing them, worrying about the worst possible outcome, intrusive thoughts, and having to use my shirt to open door handles.
I can see both sides of the situation. Not the part with the dad but I know that sometimes fear and uncertainty can be quite debilitating. The fear of losing someone, whether their love or respect. When it can’t be let out it’s internalized. It builds up until you get panic or anxiety attacks. Sometimes you even come to fear yourself. On the other side of the coin when issue’s start to affect others, especially those you care about, then it’s time to put your foot down. It would be hard and painful but it needs doing.
I know this child's pain. My parents tried to think of any reason that my tics could be caused by something they could fix. I have Tourette's syndrome and I have OCD. I can't be "fixed" in the sense that there is something to repair. I just have to handle life with a bit of a difference in my normal. My father found a way to accept that. My mother far less so. I work to find humor in my tics and in the chaos of my mind, and my father gets that as my way to cope, my mother doesn't think there is anything funny about my tics. She's wrong, because there is indeed something pretty funny about my cussing out penguins on a daily basis or my uncontrollable waving or nodding at strangers. Yes, some tics are awful and I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy with the amount of pain they cause me, but if I can find joy in my tics others can too. There are some medications that have been found to aid in lessening the frequency or severity of tics and I have found one that helps me. These treatments aren't for everyone, but having a means to aid my day to day function has allowed me to keep my head above water and enjoy life to the fullest. I could up my treatment and likely remove all my tics, but that wouldn't be me and I wouldn't be happy.
And trying to explain it with visual aid to my therapist just started to make it hard to control. Trying to keep it a secret is the only way I've ever been able to control it.
I'm a single mom and I have OCD, and am very open about it. Because it's not about just me. You NEED to be 100% open with medical pros, otherwise it could end in tragedy!
I have OCD. Real OCD. Not the quirky "cute" thing people love to depict it as and smack "little bit ocd" on mugs and t-shirts. Its hard enough having to live with it as an adult.
I could never excuse what the mother did here, but I do feel for her. OCD is extremely stigmatized and misunderstood by most people. If she had been treated with compassion and understanding, as well as respect, in regards to her own diagnosis, she likely would have told her husband about her OCD before they got married. But because she was so afraid of being ostracized for her disorder, she hid it. And she thought that because hiding it worked for her, it would be the best way for her son to handle it too. This is why it's important to talk about and destigmatize misunderstood disorders and neurodivergancies, from autism and adhd, to schizophrenia and OCD.
My mom was good. But my dad still doesn’t understand my mental issues, including severe ocd, misophonia, and trichotillomania. I likely got PANDAS as a toddler when Scarlett fever attacked my brain and waged war on it.
As some who is autistic and has ADHD, I think it is appalling for these parents to seek dangerous treatments for something because they refuse to accept that their child is “different”
The Mom was so unaccepting to herself that she let it come in the way of being herself, a wife, a mother. I think she realizes her mistake, but I hope the guilt/regrets don't cloud her as well.
This makes me glad for my mother who also has OCD and I inherit it from. When she started to notice signs of it from her own experince she was able to help me work through it and get myself a therapist to help me deal with it
Society has told generations of kids that being different is bad and they we should hide it however we can, we can’t just blame her for doing this wrong decision as if it was her original idea, she obviously has been bullied or something more
"Thought if you knew there was something wrong with me you wouldn't love me," oh honey the OCD isn't what's wrong with you. What's wrong with you is the fact that you rather put your son through this much pain and risk than just admit to yourself and your son that he's neurodivergent.
It’s more like the mom than the dad. The mom knew her son had OCD but still took him to a doctor who gave him medication for something that he didn’t have. The father didn't know that his wife had OCD and his son inherited it from her. She let her own insecurities affect her son. It was her fault.
I have Asperger's and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Neither were my parents, in fact they did everything in both their powers to help me through it and it's why I'm who I am today. Shame on any parent who thinks having a disability makes you an outcast or a freak or unlovable. I pity those who are so narrow-minded.
I have a whole family of neurodivergent people (a husband with ADHD, my daughter also has ADHD and my son is a non verbal autistic), I would never not love them because of their needs and differences. I also would never make them go through unnecessary procedures and take unnecessary medicine.
I have OCD,TICS,anxiety and tourette syndrome, it's truly hard, my anxiety makes up stuff like " you're mom will die if you don't do this " and even though it sounds so illogical I feel like it's real and like it'll be my fault, and then when I do it might not feel right so I do it a bunch of times until it feels " right " sometimes I even bite myself because I think someone I hate is controlling my hands and will take all my family's love, it hurts and it's tiring but it's not as simple as just to just stop, if a doctor says you're kid might have something don't deny it or refuse to believe it.
My parents do this to me. Long term antibodiodics, IV infusions, all that has permanently damaged my liver. My mom has munchousens. This is abuse. My parents found a way around dhs and cps. This is all too real.
That woman could have killed her son. All those antibiotics probably harmed him. Now the husband is probably going to divorce her for lying to him and maybe take the son
I was diagnosed with asperger when I was a teenager with relatives from both sides also showing signs I am blessed with an understanding family which is why seeing things like this hurts and scares me how my life could have been
I'm a doctor and I have OCD. My mother tells that I'm fine and I don't suffer from any ocd or whatever. When I told my parents, they told me I've become mad. That really hurt me. I was preparing for my pg exams. I lost track. I even told them the only resort is getting treated. My father listened to it, but said nothing. All these years they were proud parents but they drew the line there.. I hope I gain strength to do it for myself.
I just told my parents about that yesterday, after some years failing college for that (with the risk of not being able to continue due to money problems). They cannot understand it too, i will have to work in something else to start paying my treatment with an CBT-therapist. I feel very supported in other areas but this one is hard for them to grasp already...
Please be so very proud of yourself. Ocd crippled me in high school. I could be so far in my college education if Covid didn’t hit after it was already so bad. You’re a whole doctor! Defied the odds. Ocd cannot control us.
I’m neurodivergent and this makes me cry everytime I watch the boxset because I’m a outcast to parts of my family I don’t feel completely loved by parts of my family because of my mental health I still blame myself for being born this way even though I shouldn’t blame myself but I can’t stop blaming myself because I been blamed for messing up the family way too many times I’m convinced I’m the problem 😢I want to love myself and my uniqueness but it’s hard I’m learning self love gradually but gradually is not enough in my eyes I should of had self love and self esteem years ago I’m 22 and still hating myself.
I feel for the mom. I just wish she would have gotten help. However, physical problems should ALWAYS have priority over mental health issues. When the physical issues are under control, then you can worry about the mental health issues.
mental health issues can turn into physical issues and often can be the cause of them. when i first moved into my college dorm my anxiety was so bad that i made myself sick to the point where i couldn't eat for weeks because i would throw up immediately and i had horrible stomach pain worse than when i had apendicitis. so no, i would beg to differ that it is important to look at both.
@@Lena-bu6zn what I meant was that as a provider, you have to take care of the physical symptoms first, especially if they’re life threatening. Then, you treat the mental symptoms. If possible, you can work on both simultaneously. I’m well aware that they can cause each other. However, I’ve been told many times that my patients’ issues were behavioral when they were, in fact, physical health issues that had to be treated first.
6:57 He lives with his wife and his son is that grown up and he didn't notice his wife had OCD. Behaviour out of the ordinary such as waving hand tend to be noticed though. You notice them after one week under the same roof.
I suffered from mental illnesses as a child growing up being told it was from being abused as a kid. I’ve suffered all through my adult years and in that time I birthed 2 sons. Now they’re grown and both of them suffer from mental health issues. I feel so guilty! Had I known what was wrong with me would be passed onto my babies I wouldn’t have had children. I love them no matter what and don’t wish they were never born but I feel super guilty that they suffer mentally like I do. I would never wish what we go through on anyone.
The husband is the problem, the mother didn't want her child to go through what she did as a child, which is understandable, but she is still in the wrong as well.
I have anxiety disorder, though it has got better over the years. At first, we didn't know what it was and it took months to diagnose and multiple doctor/hospital visits. Tried pills but didn't like the side effects, quit cold turkey and slowly improved. It was more understandable in my case because a few months before the symptoms started, I'd experienced a severe emotional trauma coupled with big changes in my life.
I dont get why someone would be ashamed to say their child has OCD. Or if you even have OCD! It's something you cannot control that you have, there are over 7 billion people in the world, you are totally going to find friends who will accept you and even help with your condition.
@misukiantabella1643, as someone who has an OCD, I can tell you that OCD can take many forms, not only things like constant hand-washing; and that each form of OCD can bring its own types of shame, low self-esteem, self-hatred, embarrassment, and need to hide the compulsive action(s) from others. Also, just because there are millions of people in the world doesn't mean that those of us with OCD will find it easy or even possible to meet a lot (or in some cases, even a few) people who will be truly supportive, non-judgmental and trustworthy if we confide in them about our condition. Personally, for every supportive and non-judgmental person I've found regarding my OCD, I've probably had to deal with at least twenty, probably more, who have laughed, called me names, exposed me to rooms full of people, made fun of me to my face and behind my back, and definitely judged me. I have friends I've known and trusted for almost 30 years that I've never told because I'm so ashamed. So to make a long story short (too late), it's not nearly as easy for some people with OCD to share about it with others as you might think, and it can also be very difficult to find truly supportive and accepting people to tell.
@@kirajenmystic9955 I believe you have nothing to be ashamed of, but I understand how you do not want to tell others about it. I'm sorry you've suffered through meeting such rude people, but I hope you will find someone who accepts all of you!
@@maskedlucario Thank you. Knowing logically that we shouldn't feel ashamed of something is often eons away from how we actually feel, especially when others have treated us in a way that tells us we are right to feel ashamed for the way we are or for what we're doing. But I have been incredibly blessed to find a husband, a couple friends and a few family members who are accepting and supportive, even though I haven't managed to make any progress with overcoming my OCD. I wish everyone with an OCD had at least one person like this in their lives.
People are cruel and kids are extremely cruel little people with no filter. What I mean by that is that her son would quite likely get bullied for his OCD. It feels like she was bullied for her OCD in high school -- and never got any support from her parents, aside from “stop acting weird and they’ll leave you alone”. As a result, she ended up with a deep-seated fear of rejection and avoidance of ever acknowledging her condition. So, when she realized her son’s classmates were starting to treat him differently, she was so desperate to prevent him from repeating her experience that she believed it was just PANDAS and not something permanent. I’m not defending her, but I can understand where she is coming from -- people like her are subtly told it’s their problem for being born that way and it’s their fault for being mocked and bullied. That they will never be accepted as they are unless they "fix" themselves. She didn’t want to see her son come home crying from school and go to classes expecting ridicule from his peers -- and in her mind, therapy seemed like a small price to pay. Once again, she isn’t in the right in any way -- but this is just the way society scars people.
I've heard situations where people have ocd, and they get very panicked when things aren't the exact way they want. There are parents who refuse to see/accept the reality that's right in front of them.
Yo I have ADHD and high functioning autism. If you are worried that someone you love will not love you for having a mental disorder, you won’t know unless you ask. Talking about it will help you understand if they are right from the beginning. If you are afraid then that’s ok. It’s scary to know how they will react but once you get it out of the way then you will be able to live your life.
I have OCD myself and it can be hard to live with. You just keep going on with life because you have to take care of yourself. I work in a daycare and that’s germ city, I tell myself everyday that their are germs 🦠 everywhere and there’s really nothing you can do about it.
As someone with ADHD, mental health problems, and probably mild autism or OCD, any parent that doesn't take good care of their child has failed as a parent.
My father refuses to accept I’m just different because god gave me a cocktail of disorders: ADHD OCD ADD Bipolar etc. It gets very discouraging and hurts when he tries to make me “normal”.
The fact that you claim both ADHD _and_ ADD makes it seem like you're self-diagnosing. By the way, ADD is no longer a valid diagnosis in the DSM-5, since the symptoms are already part of the ADHD complex. Meaning if you have ADHD, you _already_ have what used to be ADD by default.
@@JakkFrost1 Okay 1: I didn’t know there were changes I’m 13. 2: I’m not “self diagnosing” my mother took me to get tests 6 years ago because her and my father were curious and it turns out that I have ADHD OCD and Bipolar Disorder. Notice how I took out the ADD because apparently there was a change I didn’t know? Yw.
As someone who has a mental disorder (BPD and PTSD is anyone is wondering) I know the fear and the shame that comes with it, but you HAVE TO BE TRANSPARENT ON THE CONDITION! Especially if there is a genetic component to it. My mental health disorder is genetic, I know that because my mom had depression when she was younger. If your partner judges you for your mental health struggles, he isn't even worth the time.
Uh, excuse you. WRONG with someone??? All you need is 1. And then you got people who grab like, 5-7 and totally waste them all and that's not worse? You would probably do well to learn the methods of having a low waste lifestyle.
![Twenty One Pilots - The Line (from Arcane Season 2) [Official Audio]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/XCz7WUotXs8/mqdefault.jpg)
The fact that the mom knew there was a high chance it was OCD and she still let him take a controversial treatment for something unrelated is wild
I know! That’s what makes her worse than the dad in my eyes.
Because the mom refused to acknowledged her ocd, thinking her hisband wouldn't love her anymore. That irrational fear is the foundation of her child misdiagnosis.
It was stupid thing to do. Hiding her own health history from her husband and blaming another illness for her son condition.
@@snowyconfession The mother's fear is not so irrational, I mean, not everyone would be willing to understand a person with such a condition, but she still should have put her child's wellbeing first.
It’s what happens with stigma
I could somewhat understand it since ocd is treated as a joke. In school especially you are treated as a freak
They'd rather torture their son than accept that he's different....
They'd rather listen to famous doctor than a random doctor in a hospital.
People that cause misinformation like that should be locked up. It only damages the sheep of America
i think the mom would rather torture the son that admit that *she* isn't normal
@@zilesis1 yeah, the father had no idea what was going on with his wife and I think he was genuinely trying to care for his son.
@@geographylover6028 Caring meant accepting that what the "kids in school" say and how they stare doesn't determine who his son is.
Most importantly caring meant that his son was different and special but he was just that, His son.
@Chinenyenwa Mecha caring also means trying to make sure your child has the best life possible and not ignoring things that lead to bullying, social stigmas, and ultimately a worse life.
People who can't handle "different" shouldn't be allowed to have kids. Being some version of abnormal is just part of being human, so the parents should do the human thing and adapt.
Yup
Variety is the spice of life
Easier said then done. You say adapting is a human thing but it's generally the opposite. Humans hate dealing with changes or anything that is outside their "norm."
Seeing how the parents treated their kid is normal and common. Sad, but true..
Eh, lots of neurological conditions can be legitimately life-limiting. Tics and OCD can be really quite unpleasant to live with - if they can be treated, they should be. Obviously in this video the parents are over the top, the treatment is bogus and they have skewed priorities, but a lot of neurodiversity rhetoric goes way too far in treating all neurological conditions as if they just 'differences'.
EXACTLY!!! Our differences, abnormalness, quirks are what make us individuals and human. Without them we’d just be Cybermen with flesh!
at least the mother isn't that kind, she admits that her son has OCD because her genes transferred into him
I don’t think the dad is mad that she had OCD, I think he’s upset that she went along with unnecessary treatments for their son and put him through this when she new better
I do think you're probably right, maybe the actor is bad, or the direction was bad, or the person who titled this video was bad.. because there certainly wasn't enough to say he was mad or rejected the Idea of OCD being a thing.
Could be both
Maybe. At the same time he was aware his son needed surgery for something possibly life threatning and he stalled it because that surgery MAY affect the boys tics.. like ..priorities dude.
I think he's also horrified that she believed he was so shallow that he wouldn't love her or their son if he knew.
*knew
As someone with OCD, ADHD, and depression the fact that the mom was willing to lie for so long instead of just admit she had OCD is disgusting.
I think we're not trying to understand this young woman. She's probably believing that her life is better off the way it is without having to deal with her tics, she is trying to be protective just doing it very wrongly, if her husband finds out she has tics he would likely leave her and if you observe from the chemistry between them she really wants her husband maybe not as much as he wants her.
This is just my opinion but, we all deal with stress and strain differently she just doesn't want her son to have any reason to feel the way she felt when she was younger. Although her decision might kill him, in her mind he is a better child without the tics.
Same I have ADHD, OCD, depression, and anxiety. I hate when people don’t wanna help their kids.
@@chinenyenwamecha4876 either way she shouldn't be a mom
@@goofball2228 same but I have minor ocd and no adhd
Ditto
He's not upset about her having OCD, he's upset that she lied to him and put their son in danger.
No, he's upset about the OCD and that she hid it. HE is the one that is not accepting, and she knows it.
@@ohana8535 Then she should not have married him, but she did anyway
@@ladybugshyness2011 Hindsight is always 20/20
@@ladybugshyness2011should she go back in time to rectify that?
I’m gonna say it we all are thinking it “IF YOU KNEW HE WOULDN’T LOVE YOU BECAUSE YOU HAVE TICS WHY WOULD YOU SUBJECT YOURSELF TO THIS RELATIONSHIP?!”
You know what they say about love being blind.
Because we want to be loved. I don’t think it was just this man, she may have thought this about every man.
i don’t think it was about him having some prejudice. the way mental illnesses especially something like OCD are stigmatized causes a lot of people to feel ashamed for having them even if it’s out of their control. unfortunately the world we live in treats people with mental illness as less than or weak.
It also sounds like she has a lot of trauma. Many failed relationships where her not being "normal" cost her people she loved. After years of that you would do anything to pretend to be perfect. Does that justify hurting her son? No. But the Dad walking away like that just proved her worst fears right.
@@curelightchild He walked away because she'd been lying to him about their sons health. 🙄
I would've done the same thing. She made that poor boy go to God knows how many unnecessary doctors visits, and made him take pills he didn't need.
It’s hard to believe that people could actually be like this… it’s shameful that some parents could say they love their kids and then act like this. I’m grateful for mine.
Almost like it's a TV show 🤣
@@trialsmart almost like people are unaccepting of their children's differences in real life too..
@@trialsmart people are like this in the real world,sad but true and alot of these shows are based off them
@@trialsmart almost like its based on real life cases
As someone who grew up with a parent who was convinced that my OCD, Depression and Anxiety had to be "something else" because my little sister didn't have it, unfortunately, yes this is does happen in real life.
As an autistic person, I am infuriated. If I ever have kids and if any of them are neurodivergent, which is very likely considering how many neurodivergent there are in my family, I will not force them to change themselves. I will just love them and say "Yeah, kiddo, same here, no worries."
My daughter is Autistic and I love her to bits. She has the most unique qualities and moments. My inlaws, tho...? They started blaming my husband for her being defective and calling him the same. We don't talk to them anymore.
I’d be furious if my parents wanted me to be “normal.” My mom told me before that I’m not normal since I’m autistic & my dad is also autistic & he wants to deny his autism since he got a late diagnosis when he was being medically discharged from the military at the time
@@kimberlybellard6972 we don't even talk about my daughter's diagnosis. We're a family of weirdos and if people can't accept that, it's their hang up.
Maybe your dad wasn't ready to leave the military. If I had my dream job and was happy doing it, I'd be pretty upset, too.
Once had a teacher who refused to believe i am Autisstic. She thought i was a crybaby and told me to behave normally. But i can't do that. I can't behave normal. It's simply a part of my personality.
@@ScarletBrimstone Yeah, that's understandable. They sound like seriously rude people.
Why would the mom need to admit she has OCD for her son to be diagnosed with it, or even be suspected of having it? Lots of people have OCD without either parent having it. And him having tics could be a separate tic disorder.
When I was diagnosed with Autism, the doctors asked my parents if either of them also had it since Autism can also have a genetic component.
Child has an illness that both parents in in denial of, leading to unneeded treatments that'll make things worse for said child.
It's more that she needed to admit that she knew it wasn't pandas. That she was certain it wasn't caused by meningitis because it was more likely that is was just ocd with strong genetic factors.
They wanted her to admit it so they would allow them to treat him properly. The whole reason they didn't is because they believed the other doctors diagnosis of PANDAS. So that's really the reason they wanted her to admit it.
they needed her to admit that she has it so that the doctors could see if some of the issues her son was having could be from genetically inherited OCD, which would therefore allow them to treat him properly.
They also generally like to or need to have a patient’s medical history on file in order to save time on future exams, diagnoses, and prescriptions, but that’s a bit of a side bit compared to the other stuff.
When I was in elementary school, my teachers highly suggested that I be evaluated for autism. But for some reason, my mum was *absolutely* certain that I was fine. She refused any tests or therapists, and to this day, I haven't been evaluated. Going on 21, gonna just do it myself. No idea why she was so against it, she wouldn't even let my dad do it for her-
Make sure to do it as soon as possible. Many doctors and treatment programs stop testing for or treating autism at 21 years old or 25 years old. I didn't realize that I had autism until I was 22, and aged out of all free testing options. The tests were only offered by one doctor in my area and were so expensive we couldn't afford them. Now I'm older than 25 and can't get treatment locally even if I take the test. Don't miss your chance to get help.
Some parents want “perfect” kids. Nobody is perfect. I have two special needs siblings that my parents have sacrificed everything for and even advocated for.
same here. I have a sneaking suspicion I might have autism or some mental health thing. but my parents (adoptive) keep denying it over and over again.
once I am old enough, I'm gonna go check for myself.
@@Swhitmo1 there is not much of a treatment for autism though. Some therapies, but... I dunno, I don't even seek diagnosis. I went for ADHD diagnosis since that one actually has meds that help.
They have an agenda to drug up people with autism. Glad, your parents dodged the bullet. The drugs they offer cause just additional harm. You need to adjust your life accordingly and learn to accept yourself with your maybe disadvantages and ride on the advantages that autism has to offer.
Greetings from an Aspie.
The fact that they think that those "ticks" are a higher priority tells me that they either are stupid, or that they care far more about themselves and their perception than their son's health. Either way, I personally have no idea what it is like to live with OCD, but these people shouldn't even be parents, if they much rather literally poison their son than accept that he is different.
OCD is pretty much a death sentence if not treated. Like all anxiety disorders, it gets worse with time. OCD runs in my family and I didn't get skipped. A childs suffering is the cost of a parents denial
@@Cupcakes76 Like with most conditions OCD lies on a fairly broad scale and it certainly isn't a death sentence if ignored. Especially if it has run in the family for generations like mine it is entirely possible that you learn to cope with it without any of you even identifying it as OCD. Its no coincidence that many of my family "traditions" are effectively just CBT and exposure therapy.
@@Cupcakes76 As someone with OCD, I can assure you it's not a death sentence. Yes, it is an anxiety disorder, but if your case is mild enough, it can be handled and you can learn to live with it. There are many who have a severe enough case of it that it can seriously mess up their life and they need constant therapy and medication to get by. But not everyone with it is like that. However, even if you didn't need help with it as a kid, (like I didn't), as you grow older and life gets more stressful, it can worsen to the point of needing to seek out help. Mine has begun to worsen due to several stressful events in my life over the past 5 years, and now it really affects my life in an increasingly negative way. However I've begun to learn to manage it and I'm actually doing quite well despite how different it is now than it used to be. I don't even need medication.
There's also a couple different versions of OCD. There's the version most people have that everyone thinks about when they think of OCD, and then there's one referred to as "just right" OCD, or sometimes "incomplete" OCD. This is the version I have. I don't have horrible thoughts telling me if I don't do something pointless my house will burn down. I just get an overwhelming feeling that something isn't right and I have to perform pointless compulsions to fix it. Sometimes "fixing" it will take seconds, sometimes I'll repeat the compulsive action 1,000 times until I "feel" like its right. Excessive hand washing usually falls into this OCD variation, but can also fall into the regular one. And yes, excessive hand washing is a thing for me. I just don't feel right if I've only washed once. It has to be 3 or more times. It doesn't destroy my life, and I'm certainly not dying young because of it, but it can be quite annoying. Especially when I'm running late to work and I can't leave until I've backed down the alley 20 times making sure the garage door did actually close and I didn't imagine it.
Many neurodivergencies function differently person to person. You can't say just because your experience is one way that everyone else with the same neurological issue will be the same way. Knowing what it's like for me, I can imagine how bad it is for you if you believe it's a death sentence if untreated, and I'm terribly sorry you have to live like that. But please speak from your own experience instead of labeling all of us as the exact same.
However, I will agree that if a person's situation gets bad enough without them knowing what's going on, it may begin to drive them crazy, especially if intrusive thoughts are involved as they often are with OCD. This could possibly lead to suicidal tendencies. There's also the possibility that the disorder itself could lead to a person developing some rather negative or detrimental compulsions that could cause physical and/or mental damage over time. That is a possibility (I used to make my pain "even", so like if I hit my shin while stepping into the shower, I'd hit the other shin until it hurt just as bad. Glad I was able to nip that in the bud once I realized it was a serious issue). But it's rare for OCD to get to that point or anywhere near that point without someone noticing, whether or not they're even aware the person is suffering from OCD. It's nearly impossible for a person, especially a child, to be suffering from a case of OCD severe enough to have become life-threatening without themselves or someone else noticing there's a problem. So it most likely will not remain untreated till the point of dying from it. So if that's what you meant, I understand, but it's not super likely.
Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. Have a lovely day/night.
Edit: I added the last paragraph about possible negative stuff that could but probably won't lead to death.
Living with OCD is terrible I spend nights climbing in and out of my bed and I can't stop it's like a never ending pattern but I can't stop I'm afraid that something might happen. I have things I refuse to do and I repeat certain things it's made me an outcast in school. OCD is like being in a cycle that u can't escape.
As someone who lives with ocd daily, the disorder itself does not kill you. But, if it’s not properly treated, it can make your life a nightmare. There are times when the effects of it can be fatal (such as suicidal thoughts or lifelong physical health problems). But, if it’s treated, you can manage it and have a good life.
That's a woman who loves her husband more than her child. When she finally was brave enough to tell the truth, it could have been too late. unreal.
Actually, I would guess she carries selfish pride and couldn’t handle not being accepted. She just has a flawed viewpoint, because when you’re healing, you realize you want honesty in a relationship. This action isn’t caused by love for her husband or child.
I have OCD and anxiety and depression inherited from both of my parents. And my brother has it to . there's no shame in mental health. Sending love and positive thoughts to everyone out there who's struggling with mental health 🙌
What is this OCD
@@melodycamrucco9211 obsessive compulsive disorder look it up
Is anxiety heredetary?
@@melodycamrucco9211 obsessive compulsive disorder, also classified as an anxiety disorder that causes obsessive, intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors that temporarily calms irrational behaviors and fears down
@@jz8351 it can be but people can also get anxiety outside of genetics!
If you can't be honest with yourself, how can you expect yourself to be honest with other people?
That look the husband gives towards the end when she admits everything really is a masterfully done scathing look that sums his emotions up nicely: "You didn't trust me, the person you married and concieved a child with, with something important that not only has endangered the life of our child, but it was done on the premise that you thought I wouldnt love you. I am betrayed by the vert notion. This is single handedly the most selfish thing I've seen you do and need to reconcile my thoughts and feelings of how to proceed."
Its not the fact she has OCD or that she gave their son OCD, its the fact she was willing to risk the life of their child for a superficial lie.
Based on how that guy was he 100% would have married someone else instead of her if he knew. Honestly her fear is probably factual but that doesnt make it less selfish since she added a child to the mix. Just saying her reason had merit because based on that guy's reactions he would rather go for a 'normal' wife so he could have higher chance of 'normal' kids. Again doesn't excuse her actions merely explains them
Mmmm yeah no I don't think the guy who said "kids are starting to stare" truly cares. Dude literally prioritized keeping the harmless tics in check over his son's bloodflow-cut bowels. Douche is a textbook closet ableist. The wife submitting herself to this relationship in fear she'd be alone due to stigma was no better.
Minutes ago he was saying the ticks mattered more than his deadly infection. Think about what people would think?
Who are we to judge what years of fear and prejudice drive someone to act?
@@JDog2656when they abuse their son by giving him unnecessary medicine for a year to the point he needs parts of his intestines removed you certainly can judge them.
In reality, a mother that hid that kind of a condition from her husband for a decade would NEVER admit to having OCD. She would deny it all the way to her son’s funeral.
Source: trust me bro. I just know it.
"We just don't want to do anything to compromise his future"
Not helping the infection compromises his future by erasing his future
My family blamed my long labor and me for my daughter’s developmental delays. Finally at age 11 we got an answer it was genetic. So vindicated!! I have several neurodivergent children biological and step and love them all.
Even if it was a long labor how was that your fault?
@@brontewcat because I didn’t elect to have a c section earlier
@@karenashton5053 I am sorry but that is unfair. A C-section is invasive surgery,so it is a big decision to do it. For thousands of years it wasn’t an option. In fact you would have probably died in a previous century, and even today if you were giving birth in many poorer countries.
I am sorry as it really isn’t my business, but I feel somewhat outraged for your family to criticise or make you feel guilty for a having to make a difficult choice, especially after you had had a long and painful labour. Then for your child to have special needs.
I think you must be a very strong person to have got through it all and to be a good parent. Well done you.
@@brontewcat thank you so much. Its been 34 years so I’m not as outraged. It was unfair to me and my daughter. But she has done well even with a genetic disorder.
@@karenashton5053 I am very pleased to hear it.
As someone with severe OCD that started when I was 4, it makes me so sad when parents don’t wanna believe their kids need help.
As an functioning autistic I understand some don’t want face reality or don’t want want admit they gave child a incurable condition to avoid the guilt and blame on something else ‘the first stage of grief is denial
@@jakebarton9199 yeah ï recently found out that I am also high functioning autistic. It’s hard when people don’t accept us for being different
I'm high functioning on the Spectrum, previously diagnosed as Asperger's. I was so high functioning that my parents didn't notice until 6th grade, when I got tested.
My Mom has felt guilty ever since, blaming herself for not getting me tested sooner. She's a wonderful mother, but she can't accept my assurance as anything better than biased.
I wasn't diagnosed until I was nearly 50. My mom refuses to believe me because as a female, I'm considered high functioning. Her own bias refuses to allow her to acknowledge my reality.
It's sad for her. I'm fine. In fact, way better now that I understand why I am the way I am. ✨
Same exact thing happened to me. I'm almost 29 now
Like you op I'm a high functioning autistic person with Asperger's I was diagnosed with it at 5 or 6 don't remember but my now fiancé has signs of autism that she thinks is normal she doesn't like certain materials, certain shapes of food, etc she wants to get tested and I'll support her
but her mother on the other hand doesnt want her to get tested (she's the middle child between the older with ADHD and the youngest who has some minor birth defects) which I find very strange my mum and dad where good with me being autistic to an extent they're a bit old fashioned mum was the one who spotted it even being a new mom so I don't see why she would favour her other two children with disabilities over her middle child that may or may not have a disability just seems strange
Same but I was 22 when I found out.
I've had OCD and a few other things probably (never got tested), but man if it can help your mom then show her this.
I'm an artist and a few months ago some of the products I was using caused a skin infection, my skin is pretty beat up from the amount of hand washing I do. Dermatologist was asking questions so I told him, I wash my hands a lot. He says that's OCD, you shouldn't do that. (I understand he's not a psychologist but still, that's kinda insensitive to say to someone with OCD.) Anyways, my mom was with me and when we left, she told me to never mention my condition to anyone ever again. She knows but she cares more about her and the family's image. I was 23 when that happened. I was 21 when I told her I had issues, she never thought to get me tested. Your mom did a great job getting you tested and accepting you the way you are. She's an amazing parent. Your parents noticed, my parents still don't accept it after being told by a doctor.
My parents are kind of like this. They refuse to let me go to therapy because they can’t handle having a nerodivergent child.
All it took for my dad to be around an autistic woman to understand that it's what I had. We spent a long night talking about how he understood now and was beyond sorry.
My mom is a different story. She didn't let me go to therapy until I was 18 when she found one of my journals and read it and realized I was right at the cliff's edge. But even now she doesn't want to say I have autism, she says "you have Asperger's" 🙄. My thoughts when she says that: Woman that's a high functioning form of AUTISM!
My dad had wanted me to go to therapy for years but my mom kept convincing him that I was just being a dramatic teenager
I'm sorry you had to deal with bad parents. You're not the only one. There are some other people who have bad parents who don't understand their children's disorders, mental illnesses, etc.
hey so i googled pride flags bc the one in ur pfp is really pretty and i just realised i'm probably abrosexual so. thanks for having a pretty pfp
@@callanightshade8079I hate how therapy is so stigmatised. It's really not what people think it is. It's like sometimes when you go to religious leaders or gurus for advice when you discuss your problems with them, except therapists go a step further and dedicate a great deal of their time into helping you navigate through your problems over many hours and days, and help YOU come to effective conclusions about your suffering.
I had PANDAS when I was nine and developed tic disorders from it. This poor kid didn't need to be on antibiotics for so long. I still have my tics and I'm 21 now. The antibiotics are to treat the strep infection causing the PANDAS, not the tics. The parents are just as much to blame as the doctor. Doing something therapeutic or focusing like music or sports can help tics decrease and there are therapies you can do to help decrease them. Even other medications like non-stimulants could help decrease tics. There were other things they could've done before putting him on a serious panel of long-term antibiotics.
I had pandas too when I was younger because of the flu, I know I had tics but I repressed most of that time in my life. The treatment is so taxing, both for the body and the mind. Putting him through that for something like OCD is horrible
I know two kids who have PANDAS and I'm still praying for them every night for them and their parent's sake.
When parents expectations go beyond
"Good person and healthy"
They'll always be disappointed
The Mom didn't tell the Dad about it being OCD because she thought he wouldn't love her. That tells me that she already had someone or someone's in her life who already that blamed her and didn't accept her or her condition. It's genetic, so probably her own family. She then hid it and continued to hide it when treating her son. It doesn't make the bs she put her son went through right, because she should have spoke up.
This show really outlines the difficulty of dealing with parents in denial.
It's unbelievable the attitudes some people still have toward neurodivergents, especially children. Though honestly, I don't think the husband felt betrayed because of the OCD, I think he felt betrayed because the wife lied to him and willfully put their son through things he never needed to keep up the lie. Not to mention from realizing how shallow she must think he is if she believed he'd leave her for something like that.
Instead of being honest she went ahead and harmed her child. I can empathize with being different but harming my own kid is where I cross the line
I think you mean, "it's where you draw the line."
@@kikibigbangfan3540 Yes thank you, that's what I meant! 🥲
@@chocolatesugar-lovage9678 😊
My husband has ADHD and so does my brother. I have a communication disorder that makes me stutter as well as ADD. I know there's almost a definite possibility that my kids will have it too. I will never turn away from them like those parents did.
My son has autism and has good days some bad days with behavior and trouble with communication. Over time I've learned how understand and get him to understand. Some of my own family say, "I don't know how you do it." "I couldn't handle dealing with him." ECT. Everytime I tell them he is the way he is meant to be. I will do anything help him make it in this world and over come anything that comes his way.
You sound like an awesome dad. 💖
I have autism as well
I’m autistic and have ADHD. My parents are so unsupportive of me. I wish I had parents like you. Thank you.
I can’t believe this. I suffer from anxiety and depression, and am currently trying to figure out if I have OCD. My parents didn’t believe me either, and it took my dragging them to my doctor for a diagnosis to get them to realize I wasn’t making it up. Parents who do this to their children only make their mental states worse. Don’t worry about what other people think, get your child help!
What is OCD in simple words if you don't mind me asking please
@@scottlally8374 OCD means obsessive compulsive disorder. It basically means that one part of your brain tells you something has to be perfect at a certain time, and you’ll think if you don’t do it something bad will happen.
@@emiereardon4618 ok thank you hope your doing well and wish you all the best
Yea but this wasnt about the son it was about the mom. She didnt want to accept her diagnosis..she didnt tell her husband so he went along with the PANDAS theory especially after a doctor co signed it. Some people have such a hard time accepting themselves that they also cant accept when they see themselves in their kids.
@@emiereardon4618OCD is not actually just making things perfect. It's mainly about your mind controlling you. Uncontrollable thought/ intrusive thoughts.
i was diagnosed with PANDAS in third grade and i am so grateful that i got the support i needed from my family. i get told probably 3 times a week that PANDAS isn't real and it hurts me to watch this video knowing that his own parents don't accept him.
I really suffered with o.c.d. when I was younger,my parents used to go mad in me for it, made me a thousand times worse. Some people shouldn't be allowed to have kids. I'm in my 30's now and funnily enough I brought up my O.C.D today I went through as a child and my mother just got annoyed and nasty
Yeah, I am 17 currently, and when telling my mom that I think I have adhd, and possibly dyslexia (though maybe it could just be me not realizing that it's just adhd, so I wanna test those theories out more) and made some excuses on why I couldn't have it. 1. Teachers would have diagnosed me with it (they legally can't diagnose you with adhd, can with dyslexia, plus I think they might have at one point tried to tell my mom that something was wrong with me, but she made excuses then too) 2. I didn't act the same as my two very hyperactive 7 year old cousins. For the dyslexia she just complained about how she thinks she has it (same type that I think I might have) and how she wishes they diagnosed her in school because she would have probably done so much better and maybe even gone to college, proceeded to say nothing and do nothing about me saying I might have it.
I get that she may be lying to her husband... but she she's harming her son to "keep" her husband?... that's facked-up.
This is why I’m scared to be with someone, I’m diagnosed with ADHD and a a bit of OCD, all from my dad. My first relationship I had, my boyfriend didn’t want to deal with my issues and left me once he found out. The other one used me as he wanted people to see him as a good person who’d date someone no matter what’s wrong with them and behind closed doors gets upset when I over clean or forget or move too much at home.
Well now he's mad that you lied and put the son at risk. All because of your insecurity.
OCD,ADHD,AUTISIM ETC. I get these things are diffrent and something people and peers understand but its sadly a difficulty that people deal with we dont notice these since it a day to day life, its just a reaction that we just have. The best option to do is to just figure out what kind of reactions we have rather than seeing it as a social problem,depending on the reaction, parents should just be patient because to be told you have these issues is difficult enough
Man, I've Autism, and there are a lot of pros & cons...
I have adhd pretty bad with needing to shake my leg,tap on something, anything to control it and im always hated on by my moms boyfriend because he hates it and "can control his so why cant i?" Type of attitude towards me
My son was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 5 years old but he outgrew it when he got into high school the Dr taken him off all his meds. He fine now.every now and then he gets a little bit overwhelmed with stuff but he’s handling everything well.
@@deathringer1003 offer to go help your mum with shopping then explain , in the car, I want to spend time with you while we're still together- I'm happy that having a boyfriend makes you happy but he has to stop criticizing me or I'll look to living rlsewhwre- can you ask him to back off and explain I can't help. It????
The fact the dad was so adamant but when he learned the truth he immediately is horrified is actually quite heartwarming. He genuinely loves his son and thought it was best for him.
Sometimes crap like this is just misinformation, sometimes people can be taught better
I've had OCD/Asperger's for as long as I can remember. Made me a prime target for bullying and made my parents think that there's something wrong with me, thus I had to take Ritalin for two and half years. They stopped once they realized it was doing more harm than good, at which point my Mom and grandparents tried to learn more about my tics (walking in circles, walking back and forth, washing my hands a lot, and a couple others that I stopped doing years ago, naturally). My Dad and big Sis took longer to wrap their heads around why, but they're cool, now, with who and how I am.
This episode is horrible. I have PANDAS and it is absolutely real. It took forever to find a dr who knew what is was and I was misdiagnosed before being correctly diagnosed and able to start treatment that worked.
As a person who struggled with undiagnosed OCD for most of my life, this makes me angry. If I had known I had OCD earlier in my life, I could have been able to manage the anxiety and compulsions way earlier. The fact that this could have happened to this child just because his mom doesn't want to admit he has this disorder infuriates me. He could have ended up like me, an adult who's just now getting help for OCD
watching this as someone with OCD and Tourette syndrome was so upsetting to see parents that respond like this. OCD runs in my family on my mom’s side and she is the type to really want to keep appearances. I’m the first in the line to develop tics and i’m really grateful she was willing to accept my diagnoses when my tics got very bad.
I used to wash my hands around 75-100 times a day as a kid. I had a bunch of other ticks as well, and usually never knew I was even doing them. My parents never understood it and they’d scold me for it. My dad would go ballistic over my ticks. Told me it was all in my head and to just be a man and get over it. That’s the worse thing you can say to someone with ocd. It’s no joke.
i mean it is technically 'all in your head' but it doesnt help, from what i know its a controlling condition that restricts you and more people should take it seriously
I agree. But it’s pretty much uncontrollable. I’m not a psychiatrist so I wouldn’t know how to explain the ticks to someone who doesn’t have it. I think kids with it have worse ticks than adults, because you slowly grow out of some ticks with age, or at least don’t let it bother you as much. It gets tiring the older you get. I’ve progressed a lot over the last ten years. It’s still there, just not as bad.
As someone with handwashing OCD, 75-100 is insane. I stopped keeping count of how many times I did it, but I know I never did it that much…I hope you’re better now
Giving that poor boy medicines that you knew very well he didn’t need should have you arrested. You’re practically poisoning your child.
I have a mom like her. I have epilepsy. My mom ignored my invisible seizures for the first 18 years of my life passing them off as bad behavior and some of them as good behavior. Bad behavior: Staring at the wall, bad memory; Good behavior: being very quiet and having random spurts of energy (like some one shot me with adrenaline). She tried to manage it, being a nurse and all, but never could and so passed it off as me acting purposely. I will say she honestly had no clue I had a condition; but I also know if I never had a convulsive seizure, she would have continued to blame me to this day. My brain damage is horrendous. It’s to the point the doctors have recommended excises for the elderly. I must wear memory bracelets with my address so I don’t forget etc. I’m only 28 years old
*Exercises
On one hand, the bigger one here, it's actuallty nice to see PANDAS talked about. A lot of irl people get scoffed at or ignored b/c its so hard to diagnose appropriately but it is a devastating disorder.
I was diagnosed with OCD when I was in high school, but until I was officially diagnosed by the family doctor, my mother refused to believe me when I told her my suspicions.
She believed a person could only have OCD with their hands and be obsessively clean. I always had to wash my hands, but after puberty, I struggled with keeping my room clean.
My OCD has changed drastically over the years, and I struggle with taking medication and finding the right therapist.
It started with cracked, bleeding hands from excessive hand washing and not being able to tough my clothes if I was wearing them, worrying about the worst possible outcome, intrusive thoughts, and having to use my shirt to open door handles.
I can see both sides of the situation. Not the part with the dad but I know that sometimes fear and uncertainty can be quite debilitating. The fear of losing someone, whether their love or respect. When it can’t be let out it’s internalized. It builds up until you get panic or anxiety attacks. Sometimes you even come to fear yourself. On the other side of the coin when issue’s start to affect others, especially those you care about, then it’s time to put your foot down. It would be hard and painful but it needs doing.
Prioritizing the husbands love over your kids safety is probably gonna be the reason he stops loving you
PANDAS is a REAL Diagnosis. It is rare but oh very real.
I know this child's pain. My parents tried to think of any reason that my tics could be caused by something they could fix. I have Tourette's syndrome and I have OCD. I can't be "fixed" in the sense that there is something to repair. I just have to handle life with a bit of a difference in my normal.
My father found a way to accept that. My mother far less so. I work to find humor in my tics and in the chaos of my mind, and my father gets that as my way to cope, my mother doesn't think there is anything funny about my tics. She's wrong, because there is indeed something pretty funny about my cussing out penguins on a daily basis or my uncontrollable waving or nodding at strangers. Yes, some tics are awful and I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy with the amount of pain they cause me, but if I can find joy in my tics others can too.
There are some medications that have been found to aid in lessening the frequency or severity of tics and I have found one that helps me. These treatments aren't for everyone, but having a means to aid my day to day function has allowed me to keep my head above water and enjoy life to the fullest. I could up my treatment and likely remove all my tics, but that wouldn't be me and I wouldn't be happy.
I actually have PANDAS. It’s good to hear about it. I was diagnosed this year at age 17, but have had it since I was 4
I've been dealing with OCD off and on since I was about 12. I've never heard of anyone having it the way it affects me.
And trying to explain it with visual aid to my therapist just started to make it hard to control. Trying to keep it a secret is the only way I've ever been able to control it.
@@melaniealdrich5304 i dont have ocd but if it helps to keep it a secret then keep it that way, but talk about it when needed :)
I've actually started opening up about it more and more over the years and I usually only tell people I'm really close to
Ocd manifests so many ways. I promise you’re not alone and hope have found proper support for whatever manifestation it comes aa
I'm a single mom and I have OCD, and am very open about it. Because it's not about just me. You NEED to be 100% open with medical pros, otherwise it could end in tragedy!
I have OCD. Real OCD. Not the quirky "cute" thing people love to depict it as and smack "little bit ocd" on mugs and t-shirts. Its hard enough having to live with it as an adult.
I feel for the guy. I married you, your the mother of my child....how could you think so low of me.
My mother has ocd and I do too. What helped me so much was her telling me she had it as well. And explaining to me what it is .
I could never excuse what the mother did here, but I do feel for her. OCD is extremely stigmatized and misunderstood by most people. If she had been treated with compassion and understanding, as well as respect, in regards to her own diagnosis, she likely would have told her husband about her OCD before they got married. But because she was so afraid of being ostracized for her disorder, she hid it. And she thought that because hiding it worked for her, it would be the best way for her son to handle it too. This is why it's important to talk about and destigmatize misunderstood disorders and neurodivergancies, from autism and adhd, to schizophrenia and OCD.
My mom was good. But my dad still doesn’t understand my mental issues, including severe ocd, misophonia, and trichotillomania. I likely got PANDAS as a toddler when Scarlett fever attacked my brain and waged war on it.
Ayyy ocd trich and misophonia buddies yaaaaayyy
Oh hey, someone else with trichotillomania.
Parents who refuse to seek proper treatment should be investigated by CPS.
As some who is autistic and has ADHD, I think it is appalling for these parents to seek dangerous treatments for something because they refuse to accept that their child is “different”
The Mom was so unaccepting to herself that she let it come in the way of being herself, a wife, a mother. I think she realizes her mistake, but I hope the guilt/regrets don't cloud her as well.
This makes me glad for my mother who also has OCD and I inherit it from.
When she started to notice signs of it from her own experince she was able to help me work through it and get myself a therapist to help me deal with it
Society has told generations of kids that being different is bad and they we should hide it however we can, we can’t just blame her for doing this wrong decision as if it was her original idea, she obviously has been bullied or something more
"Thought if you knew there was something wrong with me you wouldn't love me," oh honey the OCD isn't what's wrong with you. What's wrong with you is the fact that you rather put your son through this much pain and risk than just admit to yourself and your son that he's neurodivergent.
For what it’s worth, my parents were relieved with my diagnosis and I knew what to look for in my child. Neurodiverse people exist and we are awesome.
These parents are so selfish and I can’t believe they would do this to their kid
It’s more like the mom than the dad. The mom knew her son had OCD but still took him to a doctor who gave him medication for something that he didn’t have. The father didn't know that his wife had OCD and his son inherited it from her. She let her own insecurities affect her son. It was her fault.
I was SO relieved when she confessed at the end
PANDAS is a real thing though. It's not widely know yet and still in early stages on understanding how it works, but it is definitely real.
I have Asperger's and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Neither were my parents, in fact they did everything in both their powers to help me through it and it's why I'm who I am today. Shame on any parent who thinks having a disability makes you an outcast or a freak or unlovable. I pity those who are so narrow-minded.
As a person with ADHD, this was wild. Just accept your child's differences 😒
I have a whole family of neurodivergent people (a husband with ADHD, my daughter also has ADHD and my son is a non verbal autistic), I would never not love them because of their needs and differences. I also would never make them go through unnecessary procedures and take unnecessary medicine.
I have OCD,TICS,anxiety and tourette syndrome, it's truly hard, my anxiety makes up stuff like " you're mom will die if you don't do this " and even though it sounds so illogical I feel like it's real and like it'll be my fault, and then when I do it might not feel right so I do it a bunch of times until it feels " right " sometimes I even bite myself because I think someone I hate is controlling my hands and will take all my family's love, it hurts and it's tiring but it's not as simple as just to just stop, if a doctor says you're kid might have something don't deny it or refuse to believe it.
I have OCD and it is the worst. Someone needs to get that boy loving parents
My parents do this to me. Long term antibodiodics, IV infusions, all that has permanently damaged my liver. My mom has munchousens. This is abuse. My parents found a way around dhs and cps. This is all too real.
I'm autistic, and have OCD as part of that. These parents are absolutely infuriating.
As someone with ASD ADHD parents being in denial only made me suffer even worse because at times I don’t know what’s wrong with myself
That woman could have killed her son. All those antibiotics probably harmed him.
Now the husband is probably going to divorce her for lying to him and maybe take the son
I was half-waiting for House to show up
seriously all that for OCD??!!! seriously
I was diagnosed with asperger when I was a teenager with relatives from both sides also showing signs I am blessed with an understanding family which is why seeing things like this hurts and scares me how my life could have been
I'm a doctor and I have OCD. My mother tells that I'm fine and I don't suffer from any ocd or whatever. When I told my parents, they told me I've become mad. That really hurt me. I was preparing for my pg exams. I lost track. I even told them the only resort is getting treated. My father listened to it, but said nothing.
All these years they were proud parents but they drew the line there..
I hope I gain strength to do it for myself.
I just told my parents about that yesterday, after some years failing college for that (with the risk of not being able to continue due to money problems). They cannot understand it too, i will have to work in something else to start paying my treatment with an CBT-therapist. I feel very supported in other areas but this one is hard for them to grasp already...
@@David-ri2uc let's do it for ourselves. Hope you find strength too.
Please be so very proud of yourself. Ocd crippled me in high school. I could be so far in my college education if Covid didn’t hit after it was already so bad. You’re a whole doctor! Defied the odds. Ocd cannot control us.
I’m neurodivergent and this makes me cry everytime I watch the boxset because I’m a outcast to parts of my family I don’t feel completely loved by parts of my family because of my mental health I still blame myself for being born this way even though I shouldn’t blame myself but I can’t stop blaming myself because I been blamed for messing up the family way too many times I’m convinced I’m the problem 😢I want to love myself and my uniqueness but it’s hard I’m learning self love gradually but gradually is not enough in my eyes I should of had self love and self esteem years ago I’m 22 and still hating myself.
I feel for the mom. I just wish she would have gotten help. However, physical problems should ALWAYS have priority over mental health issues. When the physical issues are under control, then you can worry about the mental health issues.
mental health issues can turn into physical issues and often can be the cause of them. when i first moved into my college dorm my anxiety was so bad that i made myself sick to the point where i couldn't eat for weeks because i would throw up immediately and i had horrible stomach pain worse than when i had apendicitis. so no, i would beg to differ that it is important to look at both.
@@Lena-bu6zn what I meant was that as a provider, you have to take care of the physical symptoms first, especially if they’re life threatening. Then, you treat the mental symptoms. If possible, you can work on both simultaneously. I’m well aware that they can cause each other. However, I’ve been told many times that my patients’ issues were behavioral when they were, in fact, physical health issues that had to be treated first.
“We don’t want to compromise his future”
Do you wanna delete his future?
The dad was so harsh about it
The fact they are prioritizing stoping tics over his health should have started a cps call
6:57 He lives with his wife and his son is that grown up and he didn't notice his wife had OCD. Behaviour out of the ordinary such as waving hand tend to be noticed though. You notice them after one week under the same roof.
She probably hid from him
I suffered from mental illnesses as a child growing up being told it was from being abused as a kid. I’ve suffered all through my adult years and in that time I birthed 2 sons. Now they’re grown and both of them suffer from mental health issues. I feel so guilty! Had I known what was wrong with me would be passed onto my babies I wouldn’t have had children. I love them no matter what and don’t wish they were never born but I feel super guilty that they suffer mentally like I do. I would never wish what we go through on anyone.
It’s good they have you though- someone who understands and won’t judge them
The husband is the problem, the mother didn't want her child to go through what she did as a child, which is understandable, but she is still in the wrong as well.
Why is he the problem? It sounds like she didn’t tell that him that she had OCD
I have anxiety disorder, though it has got better over the years. At first, we didn't know what it was and it took months to diagnose and multiple doctor/hospital visits. Tried pills but didn't like the side effects, quit cold turkey and slowly improved. It was more understandable in my case because a few months before the symptoms started, I'd experienced a severe emotional trauma coupled with big changes in my life.
I dont get why someone would be ashamed to say their child has OCD. Or if you even have OCD! It's something you cannot control that you have, there are over 7 billion people in the world, you are totally going to find friends who will accept you and even help with your condition.
@misukiantabella1643, as someone who has an OCD, I can tell you that OCD can take many forms, not only things like constant hand-washing; and that each form of OCD can bring its own types of shame, low self-esteem, self-hatred, embarrassment, and need to hide the compulsive action(s) from others. Also, just because there are millions of people in the world doesn't mean that those of us with OCD will find it easy or even possible to meet a lot (or in some cases, even a few) people who will be truly supportive, non-judgmental and trustworthy if we confide in them about our condition. Personally, for every supportive and non-judgmental person I've found regarding my OCD, I've probably had to deal with at least twenty, probably more, who have laughed, called me names, exposed me to rooms full of people, made fun of me to my face and behind my back, and definitely judged me. I have friends I've known and trusted for almost 30 years that I've never told because I'm so ashamed. So to make a long story short (too late), it's not nearly as easy for some people with OCD to share about it with others as you might think, and it can also be very difficult to find truly supportive and accepting people to tell.
@@kirajenmystic9955 I believe you have nothing to be ashamed of, but I understand how you do not want to tell others about it. I'm sorry you've suffered through meeting such rude people, but I hope you will find someone who accepts all of you!
@@maskedlucario Thank you. Knowing logically that we shouldn't feel ashamed of something is often eons away from how we actually feel, especially when others have treated us in a way that tells us we are right to feel ashamed for the way we are or for what we're doing. But I have been incredibly blessed to find a husband, a couple friends and a few family members who are accepting and supportive, even though I haven't managed to make any progress with overcoming my OCD. I wish everyone with an OCD had at least one person like this in their lives.
Because we do have some control over the compulsions
People are cruel and kids are extremely cruel little people with no filter. What I mean by that is that her son would quite likely get bullied for his OCD. It feels like she was bullied for her OCD in high school -- and never got any support from her parents, aside from “stop acting weird and they’ll leave you alone”.
As a result, she ended up with a deep-seated fear of rejection and avoidance of ever acknowledging her condition. So, when she realized her son’s classmates were starting to treat him differently, she was so desperate to prevent him from repeating her experience that she believed it was just PANDAS and not something permanent. I’m not defending her, but I can understand where she is coming from -- people like her are subtly told it’s their problem for being born that way and it’s their fault for being mocked and bullied. That they will never be accepted as they are unless they "fix" themselves. She didn’t want to see her son come home crying from school and go to classes expecting ridicule from his peers -- and in her mind, therapy seemed like a small price to pay. Once again, she isn’t in the right in any way -- but this is just the way society scars people.
I've heard situations where people have ocd, and they get very panicked when things aren't the exact way they want. There are parents who refuse to see/accept the reality that's right in front of them.
Yo I have ADHD and high functioning autism. If you are worried that someone you love will not love you for having a mental disorder, you won’t know unless you ask. Talking about it will help you understand if they are right from the beginning. If you are afraid then that’s ok. It’s scary to know how they will react but once you get it out of the way then you will be able to live your life.
Exactly!
I have OCD myself and it can be hard to live with. You just keep going on with life because you have to take care of yourself. I work in a daycare and that’s germ city, I tell myself everyday that their are germs 🦠 everywhere and there’s really nothing you can do about it.
Me: time to watch medical shows and dramatic acting
Me, also: STOP PALPATING WHEN AUSCULTATING!!!!!!
As someone with ADHD, mental health problems, and probably mild autism or OCD, any parent that doesn't take good care of their child has failed as a parent.
My father refuses to accept I’m just different because god gave me a cocktail of disorders: ADHD OCD ADD Bipolar etc. It gets very discouraging and hurts when he tries to make me “normal”.
The fact that you claim both ADHD _and_ ADD makes it seem like you're self-diagnosing.
By the way, ADD is no longer a valid diagnosis in the DSM-5, since the symptoms are already part of the ADHD complex. Meaning if you have ADHD, you _already_ have what used to be ADD by default.
@@JakkFrost1 Okay 1: I didn’t know there were changes I’m 13. 2: I’m not “self diagnosing” my mother took me to get tests 6 years ago because her and my father were curious and it turns out that I have ADHD OCD and Bipolar Disorder. Notice how I took out the ADD because apparently there was a change I didn’t know? Yw.
As someone who has a mental disorder (BPD and PTSD is anyone is wondering) I know the fear and the shame that comes with it, but you HAVE TO BE TRANSPARENT ON THE CONDITION! Especially if there is a genetic component to it. My mental health disorder is genetic, I know that because my mom had depression when she was younger. If your partner judges you for your mental health struggles, he isn't even worth the time.
You know something is wrong with someone when they only use one paper towel to wipe their hands.
Why? Any more feels like wasting paper to me.
Uh, excuse you. WRONG with someone??? All you need is 1. And then you got people who grab like, 5-7 and totally waste them all and that's not worse? You would probably do well to learn the methods of having a low waste lifestyle.
My goodness, settle down. It was a damn joke. How do ya'll know that I don't have my own issues?
Hehehe...