I identify with 3 out of the 4, it’s hard to maintain a healthy relationship with others, without using BPD as an “excuse” for my actions… I try not to but sometimes life is extremely overwhelming and I have to let someone know so they can take it upon themselves to do further research and decide if they would still like to remain in my life… I wish I could be “normal” but I tend to push them away before they even make the decision.
I have some traits of BPD like 4 of 9 traits. its not very "exact" to diagnose, but I was misdiagnosed for over as decade and given harmful drugs that affected my kidneys, liver and A1C. I realized from self education that my cycles were too frequent and that I learned the difference between bipolar cycles and ongoing personality disorders. I am seeking therapy but I cannot afford it at this time.
I've kind of "self diagnosed" myself with bpd. I found that all 4 of these types were me and not necessarily that one was more than the other. I think that it is really all one fluid disorder.
BPD consumed my life, friendships, relationships, and mental health for years. One day I decided to click on a BPD video you made and since then, I have understood my triggers, my longing, and have started therapy for my quiet borderline personality disorder. It’s a challenge but thank you so much for sharing these videos to help bring more awareness and understanding and less stigma to the disorder.
This is what I wanna say to Kati too, I just started watching her vid a while ago in the recommendations and now I'm anxious that I might have BPD because I'm all number 2 and 4! Can't stand listening to other psychology channels because they all seem to have a quirky way of talking that annoys me, but with Kati, there's none of that. I haven't had a hard time focusing on what she's saying. Very uncomplicated and articulate.
Nice.. No matter how many times you may slip up and repeat negative patterns, just the fact that you are putting your intent towards gaining control means a hell of a lot, not just to you but to all the people who care about you. We didn’t choose the cards we were dealt but we can realize our potential to decide how to best play them. That’s all anyone can do.
as a person with bpd, i feel like the disorder in itself is a mix of the four. to me it seems like you can't really separate them, and that each person with bpd has them in varying degrees. all symptoms are linked albeit present in varying proportions
I do get mine from the name look up ⬆️ ⬆️⬆️ they are the best I know that helped me with products when I suffered Adhd, depression ,Bpd and anxiety I get mine from them ……….
As someone diagnosed with BPD I really appreciate that you talk about the diagnosis with such care and consideration and without judgment it really helps considering most people believe a lot of the negative stigma surrounding BPD. Idk I guess it just makes me feel a little more normal
Type 1 described me in every sense, with a little of type 4. I am diagnosed with BPD. I wasn't aware of the "4 types" either, but I was never, and even more so as I've gotten older, impulsive, I'm one of those people that do months of research for a new vacuum. It does help to show that you can be more like one type than another, but like you said BPD is a diagnosis in of itself, no matter what "type" you are.
As an adult I think back to what my mother behaved like and the kinds of things that she would say. She was either extremely loving or extremely hurtful towards people that she knew. Now as she has aged she had opted to live alone( even to the point of not answering her front door or a phone call) . I recognize many of the traits that you described in the 4 types of BPD and agree that they could be considered one type. Sadly I don't have a relationship with my mother and she doesn't see her grandchildren by her own choicing.This mental health condition definitely takes away from her quality of life and her wellbeing.
@@lorrainesmith.4995 hello. How do you think others can help? My child was diagnosed with BPD and I try hard to help my grandchild. I don’t know how to best help other than keeping my grandchild at least several days out of the week.
And with this I learned that I am most likely the Petulant type. Yay? 😅 I was diagnosed with BPD in 2018 after years of battles with my own mental health. I had never heard of BPD prior to my therapist bringing it to my attention, and I remember going home after that appointment searching and reading up on it online and I ended up just crying. It was like my whole life clicked into place and I am so thankful for my incredible kind and competent therapist who made me feel seen, heard and understood. I also have ADHD, chronic depression and anxiety disorder on the side. With that said, I feel like having ADHD alongside with BPD is a gift, because weirdly they sometimes, and more often than not, cancel each other out. When my BPD is acting up and is really bad, my ADHD can come in and wipe it all away. In stead of splitting or lashing out, I forget all about it and paint my whole living room in the middle of the night in stead. ADHD makes me forget my thoughts and I am fleeting from one moment to the next, and it helps me not get so stuck in one emotion or one "bad spot" for too long at a time. I consider ADHD a gift in all of it. Which is also why I chose not to ever be medicated for ADHD even though its a pain in the butt to deal with. I have never had any treatment for my BPD. I was 28 years old when I was diagnosed and by that time I had for the most part figured out ways to work around it and make my life the best it could be; despite it. Getting the diagnosis was the final step to understanding what was going on, and giving me the answers to what I was fighting all these years. I have always had good self awareness. I do and have done a lot of harm over the years, to myself and the people around me, but I have never let it get the better of me. I have always pulled back, gathered myself and analyzed what happened, what I did, why I reacted, why they reacted and so on. I am thankful to be me, as I am, in the midst of the diagnosis I have.
I’ve been in therapy for nearly five years now and a couple of Psych wards with “professionals” and I have never been taught there are 4 types of BPD 😩 This came as a shock to me but I definitely fall into the “‘petulant” type and I took the biggest sigh of relief when I heard my exact sympathy. It’s sucks having mood swings and being mean to people when I don’t want to and the constant back and forth emotionally but it feels good to know that there’s a name for it . That’s all I wanted to know
I feel that it makes you feel like shit BC you don't feel that way not truly but idk it's like you can't stop being mean and then for me I also have the self loathing so after I do that then I internalise everything and I will stay like that all day 😞
I’m 52 and have been in therapy since 7 on and off but FULLY in therapy for longer periods throughout my life thus far dealing with these certain aspects. I am now in therapy to heal my childhood traumas. I can say that I have had ALL of these at some point in my life and although now, I am able to self regulate “better”, I still can fall into any of these at any time. Not so much the self harm anymore but the rest yes. It is less often now, and I am able to recognize when I am doing it, making it possible to change the behavior before it is out of hand but I can also be really reactive still at times and not see it until afterwards. It is a life long task to maintain and continue in my therapy to see these things and try to be better for myself and those I love and those around me ( coworkers, employer etc). It has taken me years to get here ( just speaking of my own experience) and I am grateful for my therapist and my ability to now SEE. Not perfect by any stretch of the imagination or even completely ok. Better, and getting better everyday as long as I remain proactive in my healing process. BPD is not an easy thing to live with but it IS doable without the craziness of how out of control everything can seem/be. I wish nothing but the absolute best and for healing for those dealing with BPD. We are not alone, and we CAN lead successful, loving, meaningful lives. ❤️
I've been diagnosed with BPD and I can relate to all 4 types. I just finished a 2 month intensive therapy day program. They taught DBT and CBT and It was a very positive experience for me. I walked away with a better understanding of myself and how to better manage my symptoms. Still need a lot of therapy, but we're getting there :) Thank you for this video!
I'm glad to hear that you felt that experience helpful and you feel more informed. Knowing ourselves is an amazing tool that helps us in any healing process. As you said, there's a lot pf work to do and worths all the effort because is for you, your inner growth and recovery. Keep the good work!!
My BPD is severe due to having all 9 traits and having frequent psychotic episodes. Anyone here with BPD please research how your brain functions with this illness. I have found this route incredibly helpful. It's such a complex illness and we're all different. Once you have a trigger and you react, you can literally imagine the signals in your brain. This is the point where you can make the necessary adjustments in your mind. We can't stop the thought, but we can adjust the reaction.
I do get mine from the name look up ⬆️ ⬆️⬆️ they are the best I know that helped me with products when I suffered Adhd, depression ,Bpd and anxiety I get mine from them ……….
I am clinically diagnosed with BPD I’ve experienced every single symptom you’ve described. I think each person with Bpd may feel each trait more often or more intensely than others, but these traits are what make up the disorder.
I am 52 and was only diagnosed 3 years ago with BPD... I have never had such clarity on why my life is the way it is and why I do what I do as when I found out about BPD... in regards to the person saying that there are four different types I feel like I'm type 2, 3 and 4 and I might have a little bit of one but thinking of other people in my groups and in my social circles that have BPD. I think all of us feel that each one of those things resonates in a certain way... I absolutely love listening to you. it's always insightful and there's always something I learn and for that I appreciate you and thank you
I immediately sat up when you mentioned 4 types of BPD. Having both been diagnosed and written about BPD for years, I was intrigued by how an already complex illness could be further broken down into 4 parts. I 100% agree with you that all of these parts fall on the overall outcome and behaviours of a BPD diagnosis. I have struggled with many from columns A and B with BPD, sure there are absolutely some core elements to the illness itself, but being such a complex one it simply can't be summarised so easily. It bends to the idea that people with BPD are further stigmatized, I mean the category "Petulant" says it all. Great job on your videos keeping them balanced and well informed, thanks, Kati :)
ever since i got my diagnosis i decided to go head first into research and i now understand why i am the way i am, all the decisions and things i’ve regretted doing are bc of my decision making skills not being too good.
The way you frame it all as "we" is absolutely game changing. I didn't realise it, but it makes such a difference. It feels like you're with us on the path, instead of looking at us and pointing and judging and berating us. Thank you.
As someone diagnosed with BPD, I am ALL four types, cycling from one to another, in the course of a day. So, if you are someone struggling with BPD, ALL these types apply to some degree, or another. I am ALL of these, pretty equally. Not easy. DBT helps, but I'm 69, so got the right therapy very late in my life, at 58.
I've asked my girlfriend who has Quiet BPD to find for me the right videos to watch so I can get a better understanding of what BPD is so I can better help and support her. Searching this up myself would run the risk of me giving myself the wrong information as I'm still a BPD-nooby, which is exactly why I asked her to find these videos for me. She send me this one and few others from your account. You can thank my girlfriend that you now have +1 subscriber on top of your growing subscriber list. Thsnk you for uploading. 😊
I agree with you that BPD doesn't need to be broken down into four types, if anything the 'types' are symptoms and most people with a diagnosis would display most of them. I havent been diagnosed myself, only with depression, but I match every one of these types, only my impulsiveness didn't manifest as being outgoing, only risky behaviours usually as a result of the intense emotions, splitting or as a distraction. (I know I've got BPD but don't feel going through the diagnosis process will help but i don't proclaim to have it without the diagnosis IRL). I think maybe what symptoms you display most may depend on what the initial trauma that triggered BPD was and what your coping mechanisms are (some people might be codependent, others misuse substances).
I am diagnosed with BPD and I have traits from all categories so I would agree that it shouldn’t be split up into 4. Some traits are more profound in one category or another, but I still experience from every single one
I´m in therapy for my BPD since like about 10 years now, I´m way better and my therapist told me I wouldn´t get that diagnosis now because my symptoms aren´t bad enough for it. I´m still working on my skills because I still have some rough times, but it´s way more managable now than it was. When my BPD peaked, I had all four of these types ... in phases. Like, mostly I had quiet BPD, but I also hat that petulant and impulsive phases. DBT was the thing that helped me most and it´s absolutly true that some skills and lessons are better in specific types, so you really should look what type you are in that moment to find the best skill for you. Not everything works for everyone, I for myself tested A LOT of things and found some that worked for me. The most important thing I think is to get to know yourself and what you need in that moment to get better. It´s hard work, a really long road ... but it definetly can get better :) Sending lots of love to everyone in need ♥
Emotional burn victim. Thank you you helped me explain how I feel some times. I have BPD and identify with some symptoms of all 4 types. Thank you so, so very much. You do not know how happy it makes me feel to feel understood in some capacity.
I speculated that I might have BPD ever since I was 11/12 and now I am 24 and recently got an official diagnosis after a neuropsych eval. This video help in my feeling of invalidation and helped me feel less like I was crazy
I found that I have traits from all 4 types and I feel like I've had to struggle through every single aspect of it at one time or another. I was diagnosed in my late 30's so I've had a rough go of it. Some parts of some days are okay but mostly, it's still an uphill battle.
Ive tried to get help this past year, i couldnt pinpoint what exactly I was struggling with, just have this rollercoaster of stuff. Got shoved around in the healthcare system.. First they said ADHD then autism.. And last stop they said nahh you dont need any help and signed me off. Now im back to square one.. Again. Feeling even worse. Your videos has helped me to get some grip around what I maybe struggling with and I think its quiet BPD. So that gives me hope to try again. It helped me understand myself better. Thanks for that!
As someone with BPD, with neurotic reactive depression and manic psychosis I have to say that breaking that diagnoses int four sections is counterproductive. It took me a long time to take ownership of my mental health deficit, and even longer to recognise I had developed habits that fed into my symptoms. For three years, the first three since my teens (I’m now in my fifty’s) I have not had to battle my constant companion of suicidal ideation with LD50 Russian roulette. I now only keep one weeks supply of medication to hand, without a stockpile there was nothing for the beast of suicidal ideation to feed off. No longer did it matter that I knew what the LD50 was, I had no capacity to test it. It was a huge undertaking to empty my house of all medications (and I had a lot) and to agree not to buy any other medications than those that were prescribed. However in so doing, I took the fuel for the fire away and it lasts it’s consumptive capacity. The comfy blanket of suicidal ideation lost its warmth as it lead nowhere. For me, my BPD trained me to become worse. The attention gained by self harming in this way, taught me that it was a great way to get the attention, I craved but would not allow. Now, I have learned to pick up the phone and say help I’m in overload. My support people have been trained how not to be emotionally manipulated by me. They understand that is not what I truthfully want. As difficult as it is for them, they have learned to be tough with me and to stand their ground because in doing so they do not feed into my flawed manner of thinking. They also have undertaken to hold me to account, regarding to sleeping, diet and engagement. This taught me that though I can stay awake for four days without sleeping, I’m ill advised to do so as my thinking becomes flawed and I loose my grip on the perception of life as it is. My world becomes distorted and I’m oblivious to it. Knowing that we agreed a care plan, that when my family and support personnel see this happening they can and will take measures against it instead of inadvertently feeding into it. All of this was achieved because we looked at the condition as a whole, especially once I was out of crisis and on firmer footing mentally. In the groups that I’ve attended it has generally been those of us who looked at the diagnosis wholistically rather than symptomatically that have been able to manage longer periods between episodes of compulsory admissions because we were a danger to ourselves, and therefore others.
I’m diagnosed BPD. I experience Every symptom. one of my earliest memories was when I was 5 or 6 and out of nowhere suddenly felt intense disregulation and not understanding why I felt the way I was feeling did what any child would do and went up to my mom and told her, “moma I don’t like the way I feel”. She asked me what happened to make me feel that way and I told her nothing happened I just suddenly felt really icky in my heart, and I didn’t like it. She was doing dishes, and just sort of gave me a hug. My moma was a single parent of 4 daughters working two jobs, she struggled her whole life with mental Illness, and addiction. She was 15 when she had my oldest sister. She had bi polar/borderline personality disorder. I remember one time at my aunts bday party when I was 7 or 8 my mom got drunk and started to over react and get super pouty and upset about who knows really (whatever triggered her) so she wanted to leave. My auntie said I could stay if i wanted which I did want to because I wasn’t looking forward to being around my mom when she’s like that. I felt really awful after mom left all alone like I really let her down so I didn’t even have any fun anyways. When my auntie dropped me off at home I opened my bedroom door and 5 aquariums I had with my gerbils in them and 1 aquarium that had my fish had been destroyed. There was glass everywhere, some dead gerbils and live gerbils and my fish still slowly dying as it flopped on the broken glass. It was extremely hard to swallow when I realized what/who had done this to my animals I loved so deeply they were my whole world really at that age you know? Fast forward to age 24 where I’ve enrolled into a rehab program with my 2 yr old daughter in order to get my custody back from the state. Me and my mom were extremely codependent and so close that we shared our meth use. She had been in and out of treatment my whole life but always eventually relapsed. While I was gone in treatment my counselors after hearing my life story would no longer permit me and my mom to communicate. She hit an all time low and attempted suicide on Easter Day. Luckily I had a really awesome lady who worked for the treatment center that would let me sneak phone calls ti my mom. I called her on Easter and her words were slurred I knew something was very wrong. Sent her friend over to check on her and she was rushed to the hospital and saved. Two months later she went missing. My sisters filed a missing persons report. I was stuck in treatment, I couldn’t go help look for her because if I left the program the state would get permanent custody of my baby. 3 weeks later her dead body was found in the back of her car way out in the mountains by a couple of guys on four wheelers. She had attempted suicide 4 other times I’m aware of while growing up. That’s not counting her attempts at drinking herself to death and being hospitalized over and over. Now I’m 41 yrs old and my daughter is 18. She started cutting at age 12 then drugs then suicide attempts and treatment. Dropped out of school. The fact that I’ve managed to keep her alive long enough to see her 18th birthday is nothing short of a miracle from god. Not gonna lie though It’s been a nightmare. This life has been a nightmare. But that could just be the BPD talking. And now I forgot why I was commenting in the first place. Oh well.. just the ramblings of a 2nd generation crazy lady with BPD. Peace be with you all.
I kind of have a mixture of all of these but lean heavily towards discouraged. I just also am impulsive, self destructive and have emotional outbursts with people close to me
I know somebody with BPD that does a lot of a mixture of these things. She's really bad about the "feeling abandoned/abandonment issues". She used to call me anywhere from 15-20 times a day (and we lived in the same apartment complex for 10 years. She moved across the country about 2 years ago. While I miss her, I don't miss the drama her BPD would cause in our friendship.). She also would jock my style and do and wear things that were MY things/my style which drove me nuts because there is only ONE me and I hate copy cats! Get your own style and interests! Thankfully she outgrew that one after awhile. She also can be SUPER clingy and needy which drives me insane sometimes. We have a bit better of a relationship now that she moved away and we have physical distance between us. If she calls me and I feel like talking to her, I'll pick up. If I don't, I don't. And I don't have to deal with all her issues and problems she is always throwing at me while I'm struggling with my own (I have bipolar disorder among other mental and physical health issues. So I do get it...to a point.) but she used to drive me nuts how much she would call me in a single day. I would see her at her apartment and I'd go back down to mine and not even a half hour to an hour later she'd be calling me, bugging me like "What are you doing?" And I'd be like "Nothing. The same thing I do everyday. What I was just doing at your place. Sitting here (but with my boyfriend I live with.). She also tended to cross boundaries with my boyfriend and since he's so good at tech stuff whenever she had any technical issues with her internet, computers and phone she would call on him to fix it for her like he was some "in house I.T. guy" (in his words) and that shit got annoying. Unfortunately since she's moved her health has declined and she already was wheelchair bound but now she's in an even bigger wheelchair because she has bad mobility issues from suffering 3 strokes in less than 2 years (she just had one about a week ago. I've talked to her on the phone but her speech is kind of messed up and she's hard to understand.) So I really feel for her. But I'll admit, being her friend can be exhausting sometimes. You never know what kind of mood she's gonna be in. Like if you don't answer her calls or texts, she automatically assumes you're "abandoning her" or "ignoring her" when you really just don't have the time or are in the mood to talk. I noticed people with BPD take everything VERY personally when it really isn't that deep. Thanks for the video Kati!
I was told yesterday I had BPD symptoms, so decided to research (ie: watch your videos). I feel like I identify with all of these types to some degree. I don't feel like I have attachment issues or am clingy, but I am very scared of abandonment and do sometimes go along with things, even when I don't want to. Definitely don't enmesh, but the rest are pretty spot on. Thank you for making this video. It helped me see why I was told what I was told and is helpful in discovering the next steps to be better.
I identify with all 4 of the "types", but I believe the same as you said, it's not necessary to break it apart like that. Feeling identified with more than one will make you feel like your BPD case is worse or more difficult than if you identify with only one type, and that's not how it works.
It’s been two years now since I got diagnosed with ADHD and BPD (my old psychiatrist also diagnosed me with bipolar I, but my new psychiatrist thinks that diagnosis isn’t correct and I think I agree with her). Just last month I accidentally found out the fundamental reason I get BPD, it is my learned helplessness due to ADHD and traumas, yes, more than one. My ACEs score is 4 and I’ve experienced bullying (twice in high school, one of them lasted half year till my parents transferred me to another one), SARS outbreak in 2002-2004, medical trauma (I almost died because of asthma), accident (drowning at the dock), physical and emotional abuse, separation from parents (my parents put me at my grandparents till I turned 12, they visit me from time to time) and sexual abuse (got molested two times at least). So yea…it’s kinda fucked up I guess. I’m kinda grateful for my BPD tho, i won’t be able to become such charismatic, multi-skilled, incredibly empathetic and highly intelligent person without having BPD, although that chronic emptiness inside of me and those amplified emotions brought along with BPD makes most parts of my life like living hell. I use to think about it a lot that maybe I should just went away, like forever, but I still standing here and trying to put back the fragments of me back together piece by piece. It’s the third year I’m in therapy now, I am getting better, I’m so god damn proud of myself.
You are great in so many ways that you looking for help and you take care of yourself & you are not afraid to facing the fear, you should be proud of yourself! And all the stuff happened in your path, it’s not your fault.
@Yang Li Girl, you should be proud!!! Working through this crap is something to be proud of!! I read somewhere (and I think my therapist told me too) that BPD has the highest rate of suicide than any other D/O. I have the scars… it’s not worth it. The pain tells us it is, and I know sometimes we just want the pain to stop… but it passes.. I like to think of it as a wave/the ocean. Sometimes you get caught in a riptide (a situation that causes a flare up of our BPD symptoms) you swim against it, to fight the current (is our emotions, etc caused from BPD) and get nowhere, if we understand how the current works (realize we are having symptoms and rationalize them) then we understand to stop fighting against it (the negative parts of life) and don’t panic, swim with the current, not against it.. just when you think all the symptoms of BPD is pulling you into the abyss, you come out of the current and a wave comes to lift you up (something positive or a solution) and push you back to shore. I live on the coast and the beach is my happy place so that’s my metaphor to get through it… the riptide won’t last long don’t fight it and it will come to past… everything does… I hope that helps… a lot of people don’t understand my little aids… and look at me like I have 5 heads but that’s ok. We with BPD see things differently than others and walk to the beat of our own drum… but that’s what attracts others to us I think… lol. We are VERY resilient… we bounce back quickly.. You’re feelings, thoughts, fears are very valid, and I hope what I said didn’t make it seem otherwise… I was just sharing one of my tools… because our past are very similar.. you are doing everything right! I wish I would have done what you’re doing earlier in my life.
Years ago my psychiatrist told me I was a narcissist and couldn't be helped with therapy or medication. It sent me on a truly horrible spiral down that lasted years. Years later I learned I had CPSD and what i would guess is some of of the petulant characteristics. Truth is I thought my psychiatrist was a fool and I guess I didn't hide it all that well. So to him I looked narcissistic. I sure wish there was a way for doctor's to diagnose mental illness in an unbiased way. There is no bias when a doctor tells you that you have a broken leg.
The treatment is also so clear with a broken leg. Mental health is messy... finding the right medicine for your mental health can be stressful and difficult. I promised its so much better when you find the sweet spot not perfect but doable.
I honestly have traits from all of these, but mostly petulant and definitely not wanting to let people in so they don’t hurt me but then feeling depressed when I feel alone. And the self destructive behaviour…It doesn’t seem possible for me to main healthy relationships, I seem to sabotage them all the time whether I realise it or not and it makes me so upset and feel like such a burden to others but at least it’s a relief to know that maybe it’s not just me that does this and try and be a bit kinder to myself
I had similar thoughts. I myself would describe me as discouraged but I have a bit of everything and according to the Dr Fox workbook I'm the impulsive type. Maybe because I impulsively switch between the types : D
I identify with the discouraged/quiet type and I'm glad that someone did the work to see what types exist. I'm really afraid to open up about being diagnosed with BPD because in the first moment people think of every possible symptom and stigma, at least in my experience, until I tell them which symptoms I actually have. I hope being able to say it's more quiet BPD will make a little difference.
I've been diagnosed with BPD and Bipolar type 2 a year ago. Now when I look back in my life, I clearly see all of the patterns, both for the BPD and Bipolar. The ways I acted in some situations, how I still act. I hope to one day be able to do better. It's a long and hard road.
I recently been told by a psychiatrist I might suffer from BPD and it makes so much sense now…. That’s why I feel and act like I do!!! I recognize myself in the first three types off BPD. I so love, appreciate and thank you for these video! You are amazing !!❤
I am very confused by people talking about "quiet BPD" because like "types of BPD" it doesn't exist. In the DSM BPD is just BPD. Everybody displays BPD differently, just like any other thing, no 2 people are the same. Saying you were diagnosed with "quiet BPD" is misleading because you cannot be diagnosed with "quiet BPD" just regular old BPD lol
I’m so thrilled I’ve just found you! I was diagnosed with BPD about a year ago after seeking further insight to my ~problems~ , but I’ve had a history of mental illness since I was quite young. I would say I fit in Petulant and Self Destructive, most definitely. Your descriptions are so insightful, thank you. I am interested in finding a therapist for DBT, I just haven’t pursued that yet. Though I have been through therapy previously! Looking forward to watching all of your other videos, this is only the first one I’ve watched!! xoxo❤
My step kids mom shows a lot of traits of BPD (she does have a diagnosisof some sort that she refuses to share). Over the years I have watched her go through every type you just described. Currently she is couch surfing from state to state with no contact with her kids or us, for almost a year now. It breaks my heart to watch, knowing that treatment is available to her. Her instability has been very traumatizing to the children and to us.
She's probably having an incredibly difficult time. She did not choose this and it would be great if there were more affordable resources so she could feel better and be better. ☮️💟
Thank you so much Dr. Morton I do all of these I know that this is not a diagnosis video but I need to go get help. I have gone my whole life feeling like there is something wrong with me.😢 I’m literally holding back tears right now I’m so thankful for you and this video. You may have saved my life and my relationships thank you thank you thank you!
I've never been officially diagnosed but I've been trying to learn more for a bit now because talking to friends with BPD made me start to seriously wonder if I have it. And from exploring it I'd say you're probably right that it doesn't NEED to be split into these subtypes, but it was learning about it through the lens of these subtypes that took me from thinking "well I mean maybe I have it but I'm not really that sure. The descriptions I've heard sound general enough that it could be that or it could be a combination of my ADHD, autism, and gender dysphoria," to "oh shit, the self destructive subtype might as well just be describing my entire adulthood until I learned how to better cope with what's happening in my brain." I think I would still have some overlap with the petulant type, but it just put it in a better framing for me to understand it and realize "hey, I think I actually have BPD."
Thank you Kati I am so sad today and mood is low as my favorite soccer team suffered a humiliating and painful relegation for the first time in history.back to BPD yes it can vary from person to person depending to social environment, sometime gender or age,the triggers that led BPD and also culture and the presence of other mental health issues.
I have not been diagnosed, but i have many of the traits you mentioned. With our splitting, we can often contradict ourselves with our deep mixed bag emotions & feelings. ☮️💟 it's a life long burden not to be able to live free from this bpd. We need more awareness and free resources for assistance in trying to live our best lives instead of bpd brickwalling us at every breath. Love your insightful and helpful videos!! ☮️💟
hi! diagnosed person with bpd here! my providers have never brought up these types with me, but based off this video and research, while i do feel petulant encompasses me best, i do feel like impulsive and self destructive also tang true to me in a lot of ways. i agree that they should be more seen as a part of the whole disorder, rather than trying to group peoples diagnoses into little boxes when this disorder is already very hard to diagnose and treat
I'm still thinking about a girl I ruined a great connection with because of oversharing (I overshared my past intimate experiences because they are way too few, which I know was stupid). She got hurt by that, it ended on a few occasions basically because of that and even though I tried to explain a month later that all that happened because I was trying to say that she was better than everything dysfunctional from my past (I'm insecure about my lack of experience), it only got worse because I resorted to overexplaining this time... she said I was trying to say that I "was never guilty" and then proceeded to call me a terrible person, a monster and whatnot. This is why I'm here. Even though I don't deny that it got ruined because of me and my lack of experience with relationships, I think she showed characteristics of BPD type 4. I was a great match who ended up being called a terrible person, mentally sick and a monster. I had never heard insults of that type directed at me... Okay, probably only once, by a mentally ill landlady... And I can see some characteristics of type 1 in myself, especially people pleasing. I overexplained myself because I hate being misunderstood, and it only made it worse, because I subtly transfered the blame on her in that way, so yeah, it only got worse...
I relate SO much to the discouraged and self-destructive type. I think people can change types over time due to changes life circumstances and comorbidity. I definitely used to be more like the petulant type. I have really pushed people away with my anger outbursts and I’m not proud of it. Hopefully I can find a therapist that understands BPD.
It's not easy living with it. I ignored it for years but clearing away the wreckage of my past, staying sober, staying connected, I feel better.. but I need to do the work..I can't get better without it.
As a BPD suffer, I have had all of the symptoms described. It's an unusual mental affliction in that the suffer's stigmatzation of himself far outstrips that of society's.
I can definitely relate to the quiet type and self-destructive type as well. When I move back to my hometown, I will be looking into therapy because it's getting in the way of my relationship and that's the last thing I want! Thank you, Kati for this video 🙏🏽
I've never known of any pt with BPD that didn't have "fear of abandonment" highlighted in their clinical history. Of the tens of thousands of permutations of clin. presentation, I am of the opinion that all other signs and symptoms stem from the aforementioned fear.
Why separate into 4? I’m unfortunately deal with every single thing that was mentioned plus I have Childhood PTSD…. With ED and Clinically depression…. But going back to this video.. I think in my own opinion each one over laps the other so no point in dividing… it’s complicated as it is !
I agree with you about how they shouldn’t be split up like that. I have struggled with BPD for a long time. I struggle with all of the “types”. Everyone is different with their diagnosis. I enjoy watching your videos, it helps me know that I am not alone in thisz
Hey Kati! Could you maybe talk more about substance abuse? I use marijuana as my "all in one medicine" or my "instant fix". I realize now more than ever how truly dependant I am on that instant stress/anxiety relief. I don't want to be dependent on it, but I'm worried if I quit all my mental issues will become overwhelming, and I'll revert back to even worse coping mechanisms. Do you have any tips? 😅
Personally smoked marijuana a ton from about 17 years old till now. (turned 23 last month) Doctors told me that in order to talk w a psychiatrist and have them not focus on marijuana and the cause of my mental health to not smoke. So I haven't. Been 21.5 days now and it does feel like shit. Good thing is that I am still staying positive knowing help is soon to be there and understanding myself is coming in incremental steps! (I'm no Doc so don't take my advice too seriously) I'd recommend limiting the use when you know you should do other things with your current and future time; (minutes, hours) and don't let your mental changes be too overwhelming; (not being able to cope w or w/o a substance) even if it feels that way all the time. Hippocritically, when I do finally talk w a psychiatrist and get a few legit diagnosis I am going to send bowls into me and light up like a jack-o-lantern of weed haha:) And then do my best to not let marijuana run too much of my life in a negative way. (which some days it has with too much use, or some other bad habits) Hope this helps! Method man says, "We can all get by if we unify, getting chinky eyed by the stimuli!" All the best
@@leafsagain2259 it's funny how psychiatrists will focus on cannabis but yet not help with your actual problems unless you quit...never met a psychiatrist that I liked.
@@staleyexplores I still haven't met one yet :o. Only distinct reason I've still continued to not smoke. That's unfortunate to hear your experiences; especially if you know there is something more. I watched a vid recently of a Nueroscientist and a psychiatrist discussing mental health and various other topics and I found that psychiatrist extremely helpful. Dr Tracy Marks on RUclips is excellent too in explaining various thing! (in my opinion)
Absolutely felt them all. Thank you for making me feel like it's okay to feel all of them. I was worried at first, and I felt some kind of comfort with your questioning. Thank you.
i agree that it doesn't need to be broken up. Most people within a diagnosis are not going to exhibit every single symptom, but if this ability to catergorize helps people feel like they understand themselves better, then that's alright!
I’m all types! It’s feels so hopeless sometimes. I see why giving up seems like a choice! Therapy sure is needed but not everyone could afford it, that’s luxury unfortunately! So for now I’ll keep you watching videos
My entire life seems to of been a rollercoaster of going from 1 type of bpd to another. To be honest, I had no idea that there were 4 different types, but it totally makes sense
I do get mine from the name look up ⬆️ ⬆️⬆️ they are the best I know that helped me with products when I suffered Adhd, depression ,Bpd and anxiety I get mine from them ……….
Hi, I havnt been diagnosed yet I'm still waiting the results but I've been told that it's the strongest possibility, thank you for this video it's helping me to understand why I am the way I am and not to feel like such a walking disaster to everyone around me
My experience with better help: they did not work with my insurance. My assigned therapist had no idea what BPD or dialectic therapy was. I dropped therapy and did not stop billing within a week of end of trial period so they overdrafted my bank account leaving me financially destoryed for that month's bills.....since that was one of my primary sources of anxiety they voilated "first do no harm." Please look into complaints and feedback about this organization.....
That's really unfortunate to hear. I'm really hoping that with the recent push on the federal level to increase funding for mental health, there will be increased insurance coverage for services like BetterHelp... or other, better services. People need good help.
This is why I will never support sponsors. I’m sorry this happened to you - I hope you can get someone who can help that isn’t money hungry at the end of the day
@@wuzittooya unfortunately mental health during these post pandemic times is in high demand and quite costly. I need to work within my insurance limits and what I can afford. Thank you for your empathy
@coffee_lover💜 Ugh, sorry to hear about that awful experience... When she said she couldn't help you, she didn't refer you elsewhere? I've never worked with BetterHelp, but I've worked with a lot of therapists. And at least in my experience, whenever a therapist wasn't a good fit they at least tried to refer me to someone else...
I never knew if I had PBD and unfortunatly hearing about the symptoms i do, messes with your life everyday emotionally and mentally, destroys your relationships and love ones, it is impulsive and you are left picking up the destruction you never intended doing. I feel for all BPD holders
Thank you for this video. Recently diagnosed and learning how much this diagnosis was driving my life without my knowledge. I’ve lost a lot bc I didn’t understand myself and what was going on. I felt heard in every category which is both soothing and discouraging at the same time. I just can’t find a good DBT therapist to help hence y I’m trying to learn via RUclips and such, but this gave me a little hope.
BPD diagnosed person here- I hit on some points on all four. I’m mostly considered “quiet” though. I am more LIKELY to be inwardly aggressive, but recently people have been really awful to me (they have been my whole life) and I’ve gotten really tired of it…. Sadly I have lashed out more times than I would have liked- thankfully no one was injured (even if there may have been a few mindless attempts… 😢). Doing a lot better now though. Or at least… for now lol
I have BPD, PTSD, and Bipolar. I've been through DBT. I have experienced symptoms in all 4 of these types. I noticed I had an emotional reaction when I heard "petulant" symptoms. I think you're dead on when you say these categories are stigmatizing. Just the word 'petulant' starts my self destructive thoughts, even though I do fit multiple categories. This may not be a super helpful way to think of things for some folks.
BPD and bipolar are condraticing disorders. bipolar is characterized by long lasting extreme emotions and BPD is characterized by quickly changing extreme emotions.
And I have both. It's pretty rude to make a comment like this when you do not know my situation, diagnoses, or how much/ what kind of treatment I've had to understand my condition. It's been a decade and multiple doctors with the same diagnoses, if you are curious.
@@FragileFemme My apologies for coming off as rude, that was not my intention! I should have elaborated why I said that. As a psychologist, I know it's not uncommon to be diagnosed with both. They have many overlapping symptoms and some people refer to the diagnosis of both as "borderpolar". Many people with "borderpolar" feel that having both diagnoses explains them best, and others with "borderpolar" feel that they have been misdiagnosed due to the similarities/overlaps in symptoms. There is debate among the community about their comorbidity due to this reason. People are also often misdiagnosed as having bipolar when they have BPD or vice versa for the same reason. Ultimately, I believe the patient knows themselves best and whatever feels correct to them is what should be treated! Again, apologies for coming off as rude, I find the comorbidity of the two to be interesting and something that requires more research due to their simultaneous similarities and contradictions. I should have expanded on my original comment to explain this. Also, I would be curious to know how do you feel about the comorbidity of your diagnoses? I would love to hear as it's something I would like to research more, but in no way do you have to elaborate if you dont want to!
@@epiclexi1234 I appreciate you elaborating. I've fought a long time to feel like my diagnoses fit me, so I get sensitive sometimes. Thank you for understanding. I actually put together a paper sheet to figure out if I'm in a BPD spiral or a Bipolar depressive episode. I included things like, "did it come on abruptly and is it fading quickly?" "Is it general anxiety/ depression or can you pinpoint a trigger?" "Does changing the environment change the feeling?" "Does the feeling persist when you are alone?" Things like that. I've done DBT, CBT, EMDR, ACT, and good old psychotherapy. I spend almost all day maintaining and monitoring myself, so I've become more adept at noticing when my body starts exhibiting stress symptoms. I also have PTSD, so, for me is a lot of trigger and thought tracking. I use affirmations nearly compulsively to combat the train of intrusive thoughts. Like, I can feel the negative tapes playing still, but I've mostly drowned them out with thought stopping. I experience a lot of executive dysfunction. I've been more stable than ever for about 5 years now, and I'm proud of my growth ❤️
@@FragileFemme wow! I want to start by saying, I think what you've done and what you're doing is absolutely amazing and definitely something to be proud of! I feel like your paper sheet to determine which of the two you may be experiencing is genius and something that would be exponentially helpful to people diagnosed with comorbid disorders, especially in the case of BPD and Bipolar due to their overlapping symptoms! I hope they reccomend that to people with similar situations/diagnoses as you because I truly feel that strategy is priceless to people who experience diagnoses such as yourself as I understand how uncontrollable and "impossible" it sometimes feels just to exist with this disorders, let alone manage them. I also think your positive affirmations to combat negative thoughts/self talk is extremely beneficial, I do the same thing. You are certainly a very strong and intelligent individual to be able to monitor, manage, and combat the negative symptoms of your disorders! as well as just experience them! You have been through a lot not only in terms of therapy, treatment methods, but also in daily life I am sure. I understand how difficult it can be to exist with and manage your symptoms, as you said you spend majority of your day maintaining and monitoring yourself and that in itself is extremely difficult and exhausting, let alone actually experiencing any symptoms of your disorders. You definitely have so much to be proud of!!! Thank you for allowing me to elaborate and for understanding and communicating with me! :) I myself also have BPD as well as CPSTD. I emphasize with you feeling sensitive sometimes, as do I, I would have reacted and responded the same way you did. I actually feel a bit embarrassed about my first comment and not elaborating to begin with, it was pretty impulsive of me and I would have taken it as rude too. Again, thank you for allowing me to elaborate and being so understanding, it is another example of your strength, intelligence, and compassion! I hope peace and love find you everywhere you go! you are amazing! 🥰❤
None of the therapists have said there are different types of bpd so far except this video & I've been studying, trying to heal for over 10 YEARS. I deal with bpd some also thought bipolar type 2 as well at the start.
Greetings from Sweden 🇸🇪. I have difficulty to handle my Dpd, here in Sweden it’s difficult to find help to find a ground to reach out from . Thank u for your fantastic video
I am currently on a waitlist to get diagnosed, but this can take up to a year. I am so disheartened by this… Trying to learn as much as I can on my own now, because I feel so stuck in my mental health journey
What about you? Have you been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder? Do you identify with any of these signs or types of BPD?
I have BPD and I love hearing new insights and further research! Definitely eye opening!
I identify with 3 out of the 4, it’s hard to maintain a healthy relationship with others, without using BPD as an “excuse” for my actions… I try not to but sometimes life is extremely overwhelming and I have to let someone know so they can take it upon themselves to do further research and decide if they would still like to remain in my life… I wish I could be “normal” but I tend to push them away before they even make the decision.
I have some traits of BPD like 4 of 9 traits. its not very "exact" to diagnose, but I was misdiagnosed for over as decade and given harmful drugs that affected my kidneys, liver and A1C. I realized from self education that my cycles were too frequent and that I learned the difference between bipolar cycles and ongoing personality disorders. I am seeking therapy but I cannot afford it at this time.
Kati Morton.i don't have BPD borderline personality disorder but it's very interesting and informative finding out and learning about it 💖
I've kind of "self diagnosed" myself with bpd. I found that all 4 of these types were me and not necessarily that one was more than the other. I think that it is really all one fluid disorder.
BPD consumed my life, friendships, relationships, and mental health for years. One day I decided to click on a BPD video you made and since then, I have understood my triggers, my longing, and have started therapy for my quiet borderline personality disorder. It’s a challenge but thank you so much for sharing these videos to help bring more awareness and understanding and less stigma to the disorder.
Of course!! I am so glad you found my videos when you needed them and they were helpful!! BPD is so misunderstood. xoxo
This is what I wanna say to Kati too, I just started watching her vid a while ago in the recommendations and now I'm anxious that I might have BPD because I'm all number 2 and 4! Can't stand listening to other psychology channels because they all seem to have a quirky way of talking that annoys me, but with Kati, there's none of that. I haven't had a hard time focusing on what she's saying. Very uncomplicated and articulate.
Nice.. No matter how many times you may slip up and repeat negative patterns, just the fact that you are putting your intent towards gaining control means a hell of a lot, not just to you but to all the people who care about you. We didn’t choose the cards we were dealt but we can realize our potential to decide how to best play them. That’s all anyone can do.
Wish you the best with your recovery
@@Katimortonthank you Ms. ma’am
as a person with bpd, i feel like the disorder in itself is a mix of the four. to me it seems like you can't really separate them, and that each person with bpd has them in varying degrees. all symptoms are linked albeit present in varying proportions
I do get mine from the name look up ⬆️ ⬆️⬆️ they are the best I know that helped me with products when I suffered Adhd, depression ,Bpd and anxiety I get mine from them ……….
That just may be your own BPD but a lot of people have BPD that is shown in many ways or very specific ways. Not everyone the same
Omg I just said that! While watching I thought I had all of them aswell. I definitely agree with you but now I don't know where to go from here
Absolutely, I related with all four as well.
100%. I find I have traits in all four as well.
as someone with BPD I agree with what you said at the end of the video, they definitely do not need to be broken up, it is all one BPD.
Totally.. not sure why that psychologist wrote an entire book about these "types" but oh well (shrug). xoxo
@@Katimorton "Publish or Perish?" maybe
Agreed. I'd describe the different types as simply being different phases that we can go through.
As someone diagnosed with BPD I really appreciate that you talk about the diagnosis with such care and consideration and without judgment it really helps considering most people believe a lot of the negative stigma surrounding BPD. Idk I guess it just makes me feel a little more normal
Yeah, it seems like personality disorders are the most stigmatized mental health disorders out there.
What have been the biggest symptoms that you have experienced living with BPD?
Ikr. She's so understanding 😭
Type 1 described me in every sense, with a little of type 4. I am diagnosed with BPD.
I wasn't aware of the "4 types" either, but I was never, and even more so as I've gotten older, impulsive, I'm one of those people that do months of research for a new vacuum. It does help to show that you can be more like one type than another, but like you said BPD is a diagnosis in of itself, no matter what "type" you are.
Same!!!!
As an adult I think back to what my mother behaved like and the kinds of things that she would say. She was either extremely loving or extremely hurtful towards people that she knew. Now as she has aged she had opted to live alone( even to the point of not answering her front door or a phone call) . I recognize many of the traits that you described in the 4 types of BPD and agree that they could be considered one type. Sadly I don't have a relationship with my mother and she doesn't see her grandchildren by her own choicing.This mental health condition definitely takes away from her quality of life and her wellbeing.
@@lorrainesmith.4995 hello. How do you think others can help? My child was diagnosed with BPD and I try hard to help my grandchild. I don’t know how to best help other than keeping my grandchild at least several days out of the week.
And with this I learned that I am most likely the Petulant type. Yay? 😅 I was diagnosed with BPD in 2018 after years of battles with my own mental health. I had never heard of BPD prior to my therapist bringing it to my attention, and I remember going home after that appointment searching and reading up on it online and I ended up just crying. It was like my whole life clicked into place and I am so thankful for my incredible kind and competent therapist who made me feel seen, heard and understood.
I also have ADHD, chronic depression and anxiety disorder on the side. With that said, I feel like having ADHD alongside with BPD is a gift, because weirdly they sometimes, and more often than not, cancel each other out. When my BPD is acting up and is really bad, my ADHD can come in and wipe it all away. In stead of splitting or lashing out, I forget all about it and paint my whole living room in the middle of the night in stead. ADHD makes me forget my thoughts and I am fleeting from one moment to the next, and it helps me not get so stuck in one emotion or one "bad spot" for too long at a time. I consider ADHD a gift in all of it. Which is also why I chose not to ever be medicated for ADHD even though its a pain in the butt to deal with.
I have never had any treatment for my BPD. I was 28 years old when I was diagnosed and by that time I had for the most part figured out ways to work around it and make my life the best it could be; despite it. Getting the diagnosis was the final step to understanding what was going on, and giving me the answers to what I was fighting all these years. I have always had good self awareness. I do and have done a lot of harm over the years, to myself and the people around me, but I have never let it get the better of me. I have always pulled back, gathered myself and analyzed what happened, what I did, why I reacted, why they reacted and so on. I am thankful to be me, as I am, in the midst of the diagnosis I have.
Without your videos I would’ve never known what I was dealing with. I appreciate everything you do and I will always support you. 👍🏻
I am so glad they have been helpful Victor :) xoxo
I’ve been in therapy for nearly five years now and a couple of Psych wards with “professionals” and I have never been taught there are 4 types of BPD 😩
This came as a shock to me but I definitely fall into the “‘petulant” type and I took the biggest sigh of relief when I heard my exact sympathy. It’s sucks having mood swings and being mean to people when I don’t want to and the constant back and forth emotionally but it feels good to know that there’s a name for it . That’s all I wanted to know
there are no types! that's why professionals haven't told you about them, because they don't exist lol Kati mentions this at the end of her video.
I understand the not wanting to be mean but being mean 😔
I feel that it makes you feel like shit BC you don't feel that way not truly but idk it's like you can't stop being mean and then for me I also have the self loathing so after I do that then I internalise everything and I will stay like that all day 😞
I’m 52 and have been in therapy since 7 on and off but FULLY in therapy for longer periods throughout my life thus far dealing with these certain aspects. I am now in therapy to heal my childhood traumas. I can say that I have had ALL of these at some point in my life and although now, I am able to self regulate “better”, I still can fall into any of these at any time. Not so much the self harm anymore but the rest yes. It is less often now, and I am able to recognize when I am doing it, making it possible to change the behavior before it is out of hand but I can also be really reactive still at times and not see it until afterwards. It is a life long task to maintain and continue in my therapy to see these things and try to be better for myself and those I love and those around me ( coworkers, employer etc). It has taken me years to get here ( just speaking of my own experience) and I am grateful for my therapist and my ability to now SEE. Not perfect by any stretch of the imagination or even completely ok. Better, and getting better everyday as long as I remain proactive in my healing process. BPD is not an easy thing to live with but it IS doable without the craziness of how out of control everything can seem/be. I wish nothing but the absolute best and for healing for those dealing with BPD. We are not alone, and we CAN lead successful, loving, meaningful lives. ❤️
I've been diagnosed with BPD and I can relate to all 4 types. I just finished a 2 month intensive therapy day program. They taught DBT and CBT and It was a very positive experience for me. I walked away with a better understanding of myself and how to better manage my symptoms. Still need a lot of therapy, but we're getting there :) Thank you for this video!
You relate to all 4 because there is only 1 type.
I'm glad to hear that you felt that experience helpful and you feel more informed. Knowing ourselves is an amazing tool that helps us in any healing process.
As you said, there's a lot pf work to do and worths all the effort because is for you, your inner growth and recovery. Keep the good work!!
My BPD is severe due to having all 9 traits and having frequent psychotic episodes. Anyone here with BPD please research how your brain functions with this illness. I have found this route incredibly helpful. It's such a complex illness and we're all different. Once you have a trigger and you react, you can literally imagine the signals in your brain. This is the point where you can make the necessary adjustments in your mind. We can't stop the thought, but we can adjust the reaction.
I do get mine from the name look up ⬆️ ⬆️⬆️ they are the best I know that helped me with products when I suffered Adhd, depression ,Bpd and anxiety I get mine from them ……….
I am clinically diagnosed with BPD I’ve experienced every single symptom you’ve described. I think each person with Bpd may feel each trait more often or more intensely than others, but these traits are what make up the disorder.
I am 52 and was only diagnosed 3 years ago with BPD... I have never had such clarity on why my life is the way it is and why I do what I do as when I found out about BPD... in regards to the person saying that there are four different types I feel like I'm type 2, 3 and 4 and I might have a little bit of one but thinking of other people in my groups and in my social circles that have BPD. I think all of us feel that each one of those things resonates in a certain way... I absolutely love listening to you. it's always insightful and there's always something I learn and for that I appreciate you and thank you
I immediately sat up when you mentioned 4 types of BPD. Having both been diagnosed and written about BPD for years, I was intrigued by how an already complex illness could be further broken down into 4 parts. I 100% agree with you that all of these parts fall on the overall outcome and behaviours of a BPD diagnosis. I have struggled with many from columns A and B with BPD, sure there are absolutely some core elements to the illness itself, but being such a complex one it simply can't be summarised so easily. It bends to the idea that people with BPD are further stigmatized, I mean the category "Petulant" says it all. Great job on your videos keeping them balanced and well informed, thanks, Kati :)
Oh sweet, I love watching youtube videos on people reacting to books they just read when I can just read them
ever since i got my diagnosis i decided to go head first into research and i now understand why i am the way i am, all the decisions and things i’ve regretted doing are bc of my decision making skills not being too good.
The way you frame it all as "we" is absolutely game changing. I didn't realise it, but it makes such a difference. It feels like you're with us on the path, instead of looking at us and pointing and judging and berating us. Thank you.
As someone diagnosed with BPD, I am ALL four types, cycling from one to another, in the course of a day. So, if you are someone struggling with BPD, ALL these types apply to some degree, or another. I am ALL of these, pretty equally. Not easy. DBT helps, but I'm 69, so got the right therapy very late in my life, at 58.
I've asked my girlfriend who has Quiet BPD to find for me the right videos to watch so I can get a better understanding of what BPD is so I can better help and support her. Searching this up myself would run the risk of me giving myself the wrong information as I'm still a BPD-nooby, which is exactly why I asked her to find these videos for me.
She send me this one and few others from your account.
You can thank my girlfriend that you now have +1 subscriber on top of your growing subscriber list.
Thsnk you for uploading. 😊
Never knew there were 4 types. This is really interesting and insightful. Thank you Kati, your videos are really helpful.
I agree with you that BPD doesn't need to be broken down into four types, if anything the 'types' are symptoms and most people with a diagnosis would display most of them. I havent been diagnosed myself, only with depression, but I match every one of these types, only my impulsiveness didn't manifest as being outgoing, only risky behaviours usually as a result of the intense emotions, splitting or as a distraction. (I know I've got BPD but don't feel going through the diagnosis process will help but i don't proclaim to have it without the diagnosis IRL).
I think maybe what symptoms you display most may depend on what the initial trauma that triggered BPD was and what your coping mechanisms are (some people might be codependent, others misuse substances).
I am diagnosed with BPD and I have traits from all categories so I would agree that it shouldn’t be split up into 4. Some traits are more profound in one category or another, but I still experience from every single one
They all fit for me. As you were going through them I honestly couldn't find one that was more relatable than the rest. They were all very relatable.
I´m in therapy for my BPD since like about 10 years now, I´m way better and my therapist told me I wouldn´t get that diagnosis now because my symptoms aren´t bad enough for it. I´m still working on my skills because I still have some rough times, but it´s way more managable now than it was.
When my BPD peaked, I had all four of these types ... in phases. Like, mostly I had quiet BPD, but I also hat that petulant and impulsive phases. DBT was the thing that helped me most and it´s absolutly true that some skills and lessons are better in specific types, so you really should look what type you are in that moment to find the best skill for you. Not everything works for everyone, I for myself tested A LOT of things and found some that worked for me. The most important thing I think is to get to know yourself and what you need in that moment to get better. It´s hard work, a really long road ... but it definetly can get better :)
Sending lots of love to everyone in need ♥
Emotional burn victim. Thank you you helped me explain how I feel some times. I have BPD and identify with some symptoms of all 4 types. Thank you so, so very much. You do not know how happy it makes me feel to feel understood in some capacity.
Bret Maples,You are beautiful 😍,Hope you are not with a narcissist…..
I speculated that I might have BPD ever since I was 11/12 and now I am 24 and recently got an official diagnosis after a neuropsych eval. This video help in my feeling of invalidation and helped me feel less like I was crazy
I found that I have traits from all 4 types and I feel like I've had to struggle through every single aspect of it at one time or another. I was diagnosed in my late 30's so I've had a rough go of it. Some parts of some days are okay but mostly, it's still an uphill battle.
Ive tried to get help this past year, i couldnt pinpoint what exactly I was struggling with, just have this rollercoaster of stuff. Got shoved around in the healthcare system.. First they said ADHD then autism.. And last stop they said nahh you dont need any help and signed me off. Now im back to square one.. Again. Feeling even worse. Your videos has helped me to get some grip around what I maybe struggling with and I think its quiet BPD. So that gives me hope to try again. It helped me understand myself better. Thanks for that!
As someone with BPD, with neurotic reactive depression and manic psychosis I have to say that breaking that diagnoses int four sections is counterproductive. It took me a long time to take ownership of my mental health deficit, and even longer to recognise I had developed habits that fed into my symptoms. For three years, the first three since my teens (I’m now in my fifty’s) I have not had to battle my constant companion of suicidal ideation with LD50 Russian roulette. I now only keep one weeks supply of medication to hand, without a stockpile there was nothing for the beast of suicidal ideation to feed off. No longer did it matter that I knew what the LD50 was, I had no capacity to test it. It was a huge undertaking to empty my house of all medications (and I had a lot) and to agree not to buy any other medications than those that were prescribed. However in so doing, I took the fuel for the fire away and it lasts it’s consumptive capacity. The comfy blanket of suicidal ideation lost its warmth as it lead nowhere. For me, my BPD trained me to become worse. The attention gained by self harming in this way, taught me that it was a great way to get the attention, I craved but would not allow.
Now, I have learned to pick up the phone and say help I’m in overload. My support people have been trained how not to be emotionally manipulated by me. They understand that is not what I truthfully want. As difficult as it is for them, they have learned to be tough with me and to stand their ground because in doing so they do not feed into my flawed manner of thinking. They also have undertaken to hold me to account, regarding to sleeping, diet and engagement. This taught me that though I can stay awake for four days without sleeping, I’m ill advised to do so as my thinking becomes flawed and I loose my grip on the perception of life as it is. My world becomes distorted and I’m oblivious to it. Knowing that we agreed a care plan, that when my family and support personnel see this happening they can and will take measures against it instead of inadvertently feeding into it.
All of this was achieved because we looked at the condition as a whole, especially once I was out of crisis and on firmer footing mentally. In the groups that I’ve attended it has generally been those of us who looked at the diagnosis wholistically rather than symptomatically that have been able to manage longer periods between episodes of compulsory admissions because we were a danger to ourselves, and therefore others.
I’m diagnosed BPD. I experience Every symptom. one of my earliest memories was when I was 5 or 6 and out of nowhere suddenly felt intense disregulation and not understanding why I felt the way I was feeling did what any child would do and went up to my mom and told her, “moma I don’t like the way I feel”. She asked me what happened to make me feel that way and I told her nothing happened I just suddenly felt really icky in my heart, and I didn’t like it. She was doing dishes, and just sort of gave me a hug. My moma was a single parent of 4 daughters working two jobs, she struggled her whole life with mental Illness, and addiction. She was 15 when she had my oldest sister. She had bi polar/borderline personality disorder. I remember one time at my aunts bday party when I was 7 or 8 my mom got drunk and started to over react and get super pouty and upset about who knows really (whatever triggered her) so she wanted to leave. My auntie said I could stay if i wanted which I did want to because I wasn’t looking forward to being around my mom when she’s like that. I felt really awful after mom left all alone like I really let her down so I didn’t even have any fun anyways. When my auntie dropped me off at home I opened my bedroom door and 5 aquariums I had with my gerbils in them and 1 aquarium that had my fish had been destroyed. There was glass everywhere, some dead gerbils and live gerbils and my fish still slowly dying as it flopped on the broken glass. It was extremely hard to swallow when I realized what/who had done this to my animals I loved so deeply they were my whole world really at that age you know? Fast forward to age 24 where I’ve enrolled into a rehab program with my 2 yr old daughter in order to get my custody back from the state. Me and my mom were extremely codependent and so close that we shared our meth use. She had been in and out of treatment my whole life but always eventually relapsed. While I was gone in treatment my counselors after hearing my life story would no longer permit me and my mom to communicate. She hit an all time low and attempted suicide on Easter Day. Luckily I had a really awesome lady who worked for the treatment center that would let me sneak phone calls ti my mom. I called her on Easter and her words were slurred I knew something was very wrong. Sent her friend over to check on her and she was rushed to the hospital and saved. Two months later she went missing. My sisters filed a missing persons report. I was stuck in treatment, I couldn’t go help look for her because if I left the program the state would get permanent custody of my baby. 3 weeks later her dead body was found in the back of her car way out in the mountains by a couple of guys on four wheelers. She had attempted suicide 4 other times I’m aware of while growing up. That’s not counting her attempts at drinking herself to death and being hospitalized over and over. Now I’m 41 yrs old and my daughter is 18. She started cutting at age 12 then drugs then suicide attempts and treatment. Dropped out of school. The fact that I’ve managed to keep her alive long enough to see her 18th birthday is nothing short of a miracle from god. Not gonna lie though It’s been a nightmare. This life has been a nightmare. But that could just be the BPD talking. And now I forgot why I was commenting in the first place. Oh well.. just the ramblings of a 2nd generation crazy lady with BPD. Peace be with you all.
I kind of have a mixture of all of these but lean heavily towards discouraged. I just also am impulsive, self destructive and have emotional outbursts with people close to me
Hai kati.please give tips on how to treat severe depression and severe anxiety attacks.thankyou
I know somebody with BPD that does a lot of a mixture of these things. She's really bad about the "feeling abandoned/abandonment issues". She used to call me anywhere from 15-20 times a day (and we lived in the same apartment complex for 10 years. She moved across the country about 2 years ago. While I miss her, I don't miss the drama her BPD would cause in our friendship.). She also would jock my style and do and wear things that were MY things/my style which drove me nuts because there is only ONE me and I hate copy cats! Get your own style and interests! Thankfully she outgrew that one after awhile. She also can be SUPER clingy and needy which drives me insane sometimes. We have a bit better of a relationship now that she moved away and we have physical distance between us. If she calls me and I feel like talking to her, I'll pick up. If I don't, I don't. And I don't have to deal with all her issues and problems she is always throwing at me while I'm struggling with my own (I have bipolar disorder among other mental and physical health issues. So I do get it...to a point.) but she used to drive me nuts how much she would call me in a single day. I would see her at her apartment and I'd go back down to mine and not even a half hour to an hour later she'd be calling me, bugging me like "What are you doing?" And I'd be like "Nothing. The same thing I do everyday. What I was just doing at your place. Sitting here (but with my boyfriend I live with.). She also tended to cross boundaries with my boyfriend and since he's so good at tech stuff whenever she had any technical issues with her internet, computers and phone she would call on him to fix it for her like he was some "in house I.T. guy" (in his words) and that shit got annoying. Unfortunately since she's moved her health has declined and she already was wheelchair bound but now she's in an even bigger wheelchair because she has bad mobility issues from suffering 3 strokes in less than 2 years (she just had one about a week ago. I've talked to her on the phone but her speech is kind of messed up and she's hard to understand.) So I really feel for her. But I'll admit, being her friend can be exhausting sometimes. You never know what kind of mood she's gonna be in. Like if you don't answer her calls or texts, she automatically assumes you're "abandoning her" or "ignoring her" when you really just don't have the time or are in the mood to talk. I noticed people with BPD take everything VERY personally when it really isn't that deep. Thanks for the video Kati!
Wow were her strokes related to her bpd ? I’m thinking hi stress levels or something ?
I was told yesterday I had BPD symptoms, so decided to research (ie: watch your videos). I feel like I identify with all of these types to some degree. I don't feel like I have attachment issues or am clingy, but I am very scared of abandonment and do sometimes go along with things, even when I don't want to. Definitely don't enmesh, but the rest are pretty spot on. Thank you for making this video. It helped me see why I was told what I was told and is helpful in discovering the next steps to be better.
I identify with all 4 of the "types", but I believe the same as you said, it's not necessary to break it apart like that. Feeling identified with more than one will make you feel like your BPD case is worse or more difficult than if you identify with only one type, and that's not how it works.
It’s been two years now since I got diagnosed with ADHD and BPD (my old psychiatrist also diagnosed me with bipolar I, but my new psychiatrist thinks that diagnosis isn’t correct and I think I agree with her). Just last month I accidentally found out the fundamental reason I get BPD, it is my learned helplessness due to ADHD and traumas, yes, more than one. My ACEs score is 4 and I’ve experienced bullying (twice in high school, one of them lasted half year till my parents transferred me to another one), SARS outbreak in 2002-2004, medical trauma (I almost died because of asthma), accident (drowning at the dock), physical and emotional abuse, separation from parents (my parents put me at my grandparents till I turned 12, they visit me from time to time) and sexual abuse (got molested two times at least). So yea…it’s kinda fucked up I guess. I’m kinda grateful for my BPD tho, i won’t be able to become such charismatic, multi-skilled, incredibly empathetic and highly intelligent person without having BPD, although that chronic emptiness inside of me and those amplified emotions brought along with BPD makes most parts of my life like living hell. I use to think about it a lot that maybe I should just went away, like forever, but I still standing here and trying to put back the fragments of me back together piece by piece. It’s the third year I’m in therapy now, I am getting better, I’m so god damn proud of myself.
You are great in so many ways that you looking for help and you take care of yourself & you are not afraid to facing the fear, you should be proud of yourself!
And all the stuff happened in your path, it’s not your fault.
@Yang Li Girl, you should be proud!!! Working through this crap is something to be proud of!! I read somewhere (and I think my therapist told me too) that BPD has the highest rate of suicide than any other D/O. I have the scars… it’s not worth it. The pain tells us it is, and I know sometimes we just want the pain to stop… but it passes.. I like to think of it as a wave/the ocean. Sometimes you get caught in a riptide (a situation that causes a flare up of our BPD symptoms) you swim against it, to fight the current (is our emotions, etc caused from BPD) and get nowhere, if we understand how the current works (realize we are having symptoms and rationalize them) then we understand to stop fighting against it (the negative parts of life) and don’t panic, swim with the current, not against it.. just when you think all the symptoms of BPD is pulling you into the abyss, you come out of the current and a wave comes to lift you up (something positive or a solution) and push you back to shore. I live on the coast and the beach is my happy place so that’s my metaphor to get through it… the riptide won’t last long don’t fight it and it will come to past… everything does… I hope that helps… a lot of people don’t understand my little aids… and look at me like I have 5 heads but that’s ok. We with BPD see things differently than others and walk to the beat of our own drum… but that’s what attracts others to us I think… lol. We are VERY resilient… we bounce back quickly.. You’re feelings, thoughts, fears are very valid, and I hope what I said didn’t make it seem otherwise… I was just sharing one of my tools… because our past are very similar.. you are doing everything right! I wish I would have done what you’re doing earlier in my life.
as you should be! were very proud of you too
It's a curse and a blessing... just not 50/50.
@@jendavis9185 I like that metaphor. Makes perfect sense to me
Years ago my psychiatrist told me I was a narcissist and couldn't be helped with therapy or medication. It sent me on a truly horrible spiral down that lasted years. Years later I learned I had CPSD and what i would guess is some of of the petulant characteristics. Truth is I thought my psychiatrist was a fool and I guess I didn't hide it all that well. So to him I looked narcissistic. I sure wish there was a way for doctor's to diagnose mental illness in an unbiased way. There is no bias when a doctor tells you that you have a broken leg.
The treatment is also so clear with a broken leg. Mental health is messy... finding the right medicine for your mental health can be stressful and difficult. I promised its so much better when you find the sweet spot not perfect but doable.
A true narcissist wouldn’t be in a one on one therapy appointment. Because there is nothing wrong with them ever.
Brain scans
Just before the video ended, I was like yeah, I have BPD diagnosed and I have basically all of these symptoms.
I honestly have traits from all of these, but mostly petulant and definitely not wanting to let people in so they don’t hurt me but then feeling depressed when I feel alone. And the self destructive behaviour…It doesn’t seem possible for me to main healthy relationships, I seem to sabotage them all the time whether I realise it or not and it makes me so upset and feel like such a burden to others but at least it’s a relief to know that maybe it’s not just me that does this and try and be a bit kinder to myself
I had similar thoughts. I myself would describe me as discouraged but I have a bit of everything and according to the Dr Fox workbook I'm the impulsive type. Maybe because I impulsively switch between the types : D
I identify with the discouraged/quiet type and I'm glad that someone did the work to see what types exist. I'm really afraid to open up about being diagnosed with BPD because in the first moment people think of every possible symptom and stigma, at least in my experience, until I tell them which symptoms I actually have. I hope being able to say it's more quiet BPD will make a little difference.
I've been diagnosed BPD
I can relate to all types. The one that stood out was the petulant type.
As an individual with BPD this video was very informative and I learned more about my condition than I ever thought. Thank you Kati Morton
I've been diagnosed with BPD and Bipolar type 2 a year ago. Now when I look back in my life, I clearly see all of the patterns, both for the BPD and Bipolar. The ways I acted in some situations, how I still act. I hope to one day be able to do better. It's a long and hard road.
I've been told I have EUPD, and watching this video is an eye opener, I resonate with everything that's been said here :/
I love that you speak as "we" instead of you or patient in your videos. 🙏❤️
I hit 3/4 of the types, I haven't been diagnosed but listening to your videos is making me realize that I should talk to a therapist.
I recently been told by a psychiatrist I might suffer from BPD and it makes so much sense now…. That’s why I feel and act like I do!!!
I recognize myself in the first three types off BPD.
I so love, appreciate and thank you for these video! You are amazing !!❤
Great video, I saw a lot in common with 3 of the 4 types. I was diagnosed with quiet bpd.
Thank you so much for your videos!
Of course!! I am so glad they are helpful :) xoxo
I am very confused by people talking about "quiet BPD" because like "types of BPD" it doesn't exist. In the DSM BPD is just BPD. Everybody displays BPD differently, just like any other thing, no 2 people are the same. Saying you were diagnosed with "quiet BPD" is misleading because you cannot be diagnosed with "quiet BPD" just regular old BPD lol
I’m so thrilled I’ve just found you! I was diagnosed with BPD about a year ago after seeking further insight to my ~problems~ , but I’ve had a history of mental illness since I was quite young.
I would say I fit in Petulant and Self Destructive, most definitely. Your descriptions are so insightful, thank you. I am interested in finding a therapist for DBT, I just haven’t pursued that yet. Though I have been through therapy previously!
Looking forward to watching all of your other videos, this is only the first one I’ve watched!! xoxo❤
My step kids mom shows a lot of traits of BPD (she does have a diagnosisof some sort that she refuses to share). Over the years I have watched her go through every type you just described. Currently she is couch surfing from state to state with no contact with her kids or us, for almost a year now. It breaks my heart to watch, knowing that treatment is available to her. Her instability has been very traumatizing to the children and to us.
She's probably having an incredibly difficult time. She did not choose this and it would be great if there were more affordable resources so she could feel better and be better. ☮️💟
Thank you so much Dr. Morton I do all of these I know that this is not a diagnosis video but I need to go get help. I have gone my whole life feeling like there is something wrong with me.😢 I’m literally holding back tears right now I’m so thankful for you and this video. You may have saved my life and my relationships thank you thank you thank you!
I've never been officially diagnosed but I've been trying to learn more for a bit now because talking to friends with BPD made me start to seriously wonder if I have it. And from exploring it I'd say you're probably right that it doesn't NEED to be split into these subtypes, but it was learning about it through the lens of these subtypes that took me from thinking "well I mean maybe I have it but I'm not really that sure. The descriptions I've heard sound general enough that it could be that or it could be a combination of my ADHD, autism, and gender dysphoria," to "oh shit, the self destructive subtype might as well just be describing my entire adulthood until I learned how to better cope with what's happening in my brain."
I think I would still have some overlap with the petulant type, but it just put it in a better framing for me to understand it and realize "hey, I think I actually have BPD."
Autism especially undiagnosed In childhood can cause the behaviours of bpd, confusion of self worth in my opinion.
Thank you Kati
I am so sad today and mood is low as my favorite soccer team suffered a humiliating and painful relegation for the first time in history.back to BPD yes it can vary from person to person depending to social environment, sometime gender or age,the triggers that led BPD and also culture and the presence of other mental health issues.
Thanks for following up on my Q with this video Kati. This was really helpful!
I have not been diagnosed, but i have many of the traits you mentioned. With our splitting, we can often contradict ourselves with our deep mixed bag emotions & feelings.
☮️💟 it's a life long burden not to be able to live free from this bpd. We need more awareness and free resources for assistance in trying to live our best lives instead of bpd brickwalling us at every breath. Love your insightful and helpful videos!! ☮️💟
Thank you for teaching us all to treat others with respect and dignity. I have learnt so much from your channel. Hi from Australia 🇦🇺
hi! diagnosed person with bpd here! my providers have never brought up these types with me, but based off this video and research, while i do feel petulant encompasses me best, i do feel like impulsive and self destructive also tang true to me in a lot of ways. i agree that they should be more seen as a part of the whole disorder, rather than trying to group peoples diagnoses into little boxes when this disorder is already very hard to diagnose and treat
I never thought of it that way. When I find a Dr I will tell them. Thank you for opening up my eyes.
Emotional burn victim summed it up perfectly and honestly, I’ve never felt so understood until that moment!
I'm still thinking about a girl I ruined a great connection with because of oversharing (I overshared my past intimate experiences because they are way too few, which I know was stupid). She got hurt by that, it ended on a few occasions basically because of that and even though I tried to explain a month later that all that happened because I was trying to say that she was better than everything dysfunctional from my past (I'm insecure about my lack of experience), it only got worse because I resorted to overexplaining this time... she said I was trying to say that I "was never guilty" and then proceeded to call me a terrible person, a monster and whatnot.
This is why I'm here. Even though I don't deny that it got ruined because of me and my lack of experience with relationships, I think she showed characteristics of BPD type 4. I was a great match who ended up being called a terrible person, mentally sick and a monster. I had never heard insults of that type directed at me... Okay, probably only once, by a mentally ill landlady...
And I can see some characteristics of type 1 in myself, especially people pleasing. I overexplained myself because I hate being misunderstood, and it only made it worse, because I subtly transfered the blame on her in that way, so yeah, it only got worse...
I relate SO much to the discouraged and self-destructive type. I think people can change types over time due to changes life circumstances and comorbidity. I definitely used to be more like the petulant type. I have really pushed people away with my anger outbursts and I’m not proud of it. Hopefully I can find a therapist that understands BPD.
It's not easy living with it. I ignored it for years but clearing away the wreckage of my past, staying sober, staying connected, I feel better.. but I need to do the work..I can't get better without it.
As a BPD suffer, I have had all of the symptoms described. It's an unusual mental affliction in that the suffer's stigmatzation of himself far outstrips that of society's.
I can definitely relate to the quiet type and self-destructive type as well. When I move back to my hometown, I will be looking into therapy because it's getting in the way of my relationship and that's the last thing I want! Thank you, Kati for this video 🙏🏽
This was informative as someone who is close to two people with BPD who seem to be like complete opposites to each other.
I agree with you Kati, BPD is BPD. I am diagnosed and fit in with all four. Why split it down, it is what it is
I've never known of any pt with BPD that didn't have "fear of abandonment" highlighted in their clinical history. Of the tens of thousands of permutations of clin. presentation, I am of the opinion that all other signs and symptoms stem from the aforementioned fear.
This video has changed my life. Thank you!!
I can definitely relate to all 4 of these.
Why separate into 4? I’m unfortunately deal with every single thing that was mentioned plus I have Childhood PTSD…. With ED and Clinically depression…. But going back to this video.. I think in my own opinion each one over laps the other so no point in dividing… it’s complicated as it is !
I didn't know what BPD was until recently. I can recognize my self in all the types listed.
I agree with you about how they shouldn’t be split up like that. I have struggled with BPD for a long time. I struggle with all of the “types”. Everyone is different with their diagnosis. I enjoy watching your videos, it helps me know that I am not alone in thisz
Dakota Halverson,Hope you are not with a narcissist…….
Hey Kati!
Could you maybe talk more about substance abuse?
I use marijuana as my "all in one medicine" or my "instant fix". I realize now more than ever how truly dependant I am on that instant stress/anxiety relief. I don't want to be dependent on it, but I'm worried if I quit all my mental issues will become overwhelming, and I'll revert back to even worse coping mechanisms. Do you have any tips? 😅
Personally smoked marijuana a ton from about 17 years old till now. (turned 23 last month) Doctors told me that in order to talk w a psychiatrist and have them not focus on marijuana and the cause of my mental health to not smoke. So I haven't. Been 21.5 days now and it does feel like shit. Good thing is that I am still staying positive knowing help is soon to be there and understanding myself is coming in incremental steps! (I'm no Doc so don't take my advice too seriously) I'd recommend limiting the use when you know you should do other things with your current and future time; (minutes, hours) and don't let your mental changes be too overwhelming; (not being able to cope w or w/o a substance) even if it feels that way all the time. Hippocritically, when I do finally talk w a psychiatrist and get a few legit diagnosis I am going to send bowls into me and light up like a jack-o-lantern of weed haha:) And then do my best to not let marijuana run too much of my life in a negative way. (which some days it has with too much use, or some other bad habits) Hope this helps! Method man says, "We can all get by if we unify, getting chinky eyed by the stimuli!" All the best
@@leafsagain2259 it's funny how psychiatrists will focus on cannabis but yet not help with your actual problems unless you quit...never met a psychiatrist that I liked.
@@staleyexplores I still haven't met one yet :o. Only distinct reason I've still continued to not smoke. That's unfortunate to hear your experiences; especially if you know there is something more. I watched a vid recently of a Nueroscientist and a psychiatrist discussing mental health and various other topics and I found that psychiatrist extremely helpful. Dr Tracy Marks on RUclips is excellent too in explaining various thing! (in my opinion)
Personally, I find that booze and pot are really the only things that help me. Why quit when they work?
@@staleyexploresmost shrinks are far left science deniers anyway. I can’t find anyone to help me because I’m a white, straight, Christian man.
I am diagnosed with BPD.
I was #4 for a very long time, now I am kind of #1 but definitely #3.
Thank you, yes all apply +wrong diagnosis, but what to do?!
Incredibly informative. I'm calling a therapist ft Monday. TY.
I hope you’re not a man, or white, or straight otherwise no therapist will see you. Ask me how I know…
Absolutely felt them all. Thank you for making me feel like it's okay to feel all of them. I was worried at first, and I felt some kind of comfort with your questioning. Thank you.
i agree that it doesn't need to be broken up. Most people within a diagnosis are not going to exhibit every single symptom, but if this ability to catergorize helps people feel like they understand themselves better, then that's alright!
I’m all types! It’s feels so hopeless sometimes. I see why giving up seems like a choice! Therapy sure is needed but not everyone could afford it, that’s luxury unfortunately! So for now I’ll keep you watching videos
My entire life seems to of been a rollercoaster of going from 1 type of bpd to another. To be honest, I had no idea that there were 4 different types, but it totally makes sense
I was diagnosed with bpd lately and I’m just trying to understand it better so thank you for your videos
I do get mine from the name look up ⬆️ ⬆️⬆️ they are the best I know that helped me with products when I suffered Adhd, depression ,Bpd and anxiety I get mine from them ……….
Yes, i do hit petulant without avoidance, impulsive and few self-destructive traits. And i also experience rejection disphoria sometimes.
I feel like I relate to all four types. Maybe more of one type but definitely all four
Hit pretty much every type here
Makes a lot more sense now
Hi Kati, I feel blessed when I encounter your channel
Hi, I havnt been diagnosed yet I'm still waiting the results but I've been told that it's the strongest possibility, thank you for this video it's helping me to understand why I am the way I am and not to feel like such a walking disaster to everyone around me
My experience with better help: they did not work with my insurance. My assigned therapist had no idea what BPD or dialectic therapy was. I dropped therapy and did not stop billing within a week of end of trial period so they overdrafted my bank account leaving me financially destoryed for that month's bills.....since that was one of my primary sources of anxiety they voilated "first do no harm." Please look into complaints and feedback about this organization.....
That's really unfortunate to hear. I'm really hoping that with the recent push on the federal level to increase funding for mental health, there will be increased insurance coverage for services like BetterHelp... or other, better services.
People need good help.
This is why I will never support sponsors. I’m sorry this happened to you - I hope you can get someone who can help that isn’t money hungry at the end of the day
@@wuzittooya unfortunately mental health during these post pandemic times is in high demand and quite costly. I need to work within my insurance limits and what I can afford. Thank you for your empathy
@@BaritoneMonkey At least Kati is free and informative. And pleasant to watch
@coffee_lover💜 Ugh, sorry to hear about that awful experience... When she said she couldn't help you, she didn't refer you elsewhere?
I've never worked with BetterHelp, but I've worked with a lot of therapists. And at least in my experience, whenever a therapist wasn't a good fit they at least tried to refer me to someone else...
I never knew if I had PBD and unfortunatly hearing about the symptoms i do, messes with your life everyday emotionally and mentally, destroys your relationships and love ones, it is impulsive and you are left picking up the destruction you never intended doing. I feel for all BPD holders
Thank you for this video. Recently diagnosed and learning how much this diagnosis was driving my life without my knowledge. I’ve lost a lot bc I didn’t understand myself and what was going on. I felt heard in every category which is both soothing and discouraging at the same time. I just can’t find a good DBT therapist to help hence y I’m trying to learn via RUclips and such, but this gave me a little hope.
BPD diagnosed person here- I hit on some points on all four. I’m mostly considered “quiet” though. I am more LIKELY to be inwardly aggressive, but recently people have been really awful to me (they have been my whole life) and I’ve gotten really tired of it…. Sadly I have lashed out more times than I would have liked- thankfully no one was injured (even if there may have been a few mindless attempts… 😢).
Doing a lot better now though. Or at least… for now lol
I have BPD, PTSD, and Bipolar. I've been through DBT. I have experienced symptoms in all 4 of these types. I noticed I had an emotional reaction when I heard "petulant" symptoms. I think you're dead on when you say these categories are stigmatizing. Just the word 'petulant' starts my self destructive thoughts, even though I do fit multiple categories. This may not be a super helpful way to think of things for some folks.
BPD and bipolar are condraticing disorders. bipolar is characterized by long lasting extreme emotions and BPD is characterized by quickly changing extreme emotions.
And I have both. It's pretty rude to make a comment like this when you do not know my situation, diagnoses, or how much/ what kind of treatment I've had to understand my condition. It's been a decade and multiple doctors with the same diagnoses, if you are curious.
@@FragileFemme My apologies for coming off as rude, that was not my intention! I should have elaborated why I said that. As a psychologist, I know it's not uncommon to be diagnosed with both. They have many overlapping symptoms and some people refer to the diagnosis of both as "borderpolar". Many people with "borderpolar" feel that having both diagnoses explains them best, and others with "borderpolar" feel that they have been misdiagnosed due to the similarities/overlaps in symptoms. There is debate among the community about their comorbidity due to this reason. People are also often misdiagnosed as having bipolar when they have BPD or vice versa for the same reason. Ultimately, I believe the patient knows themselves best and whatever feels correct to them is what should be treated! Again, apologies for coming off as rude, I find the comorbidity of the two to be interesting and something that requires more research due to their simultaneous similarities and contradictions. I should have expanded on my original comment to explain this. Also, I would be curious to know how do you feel about the comorbidity of your diagnoses? I would love to hear as it's something I would like to research more, but in no way do you have to elaborate if you dont want to!
@@epiclexi1234 I appreciate you elaborating. I've fought a long time to feel like my diagnoses fit me, so I get sensitive sometimes. Thank you for understanding. I actually put together a paper sheet to figure out if I'm in a BPD spiral or a Bipolar depressive episode. I included things like, "did it come on abruptly and is it fading quickly?" "Is it general anxiety/ depression or can you pinpoint a trigger?" "Does changing the environment change the feeling?" "Does the feeling persist when you are alone?"
Things like that. I've done DBT, CBT, EMDR, ACT, and good old psychotherapy. I spend almost all day maintaining and monitoring myself, so I've become more adept at noticing when my body starts exhibiting stress symptoms. I also have PTSD, so, for me is a lot of trigger and thought tracking. I use affirmations nearly compulsively to combat the train of intrusive thoughts. Like, I can feel the negative tapes playing still, but I've mostly drowned them out with thought stopping. I experience a lot of executive dysfunction. I've been more stable than ever for about 5 years now, and I'm proud of my growth ❤️
@@FragileFemme wow! I want to start by saying, I think what you've done and what you're doing is absolutely amazing and definitely something to be proud of! I feel like your paper sheet to determine which of the two you may be experiencing is genius and something that would be exponentially helpful to people diagnosed with comorbid disorders, especially in the case of BPD and Bipolar due to their overlapping symptoms! I hope they reccomend that to people with similar situations/diagnoses as you because I truly feel that strategy is priceless to people who experience diagnoses such as yourself as I understand how uncontrollable and "impossible" it sometimes feels just to exist with this disorders, let alone manage them. I also think your positive affirmations to combat negative thoughts/self talk is extremely beneficial, I do the same thing. You are certainly a very strong and intelligent individual to be able to monitor, manage, and combat the negative symptoms of your disorders! as well as just experience them! You have been through a lot not only in terms of therapy, treatment methods, but also in daily life I am sure. I understand how difficult it can be to exist with and manage your symptoms, as you said you spend majority of your day maintaining and monitoring yourself and that in itself is extremely difficult and exhausting, let alone actually experiencing any symptoms of your disorders. You definitely have so much to be proud of!!! Thank you for allowing me to elaborate and for understanding and communicating with me! :)
I myself also have BPD as well as CPSTD. I emphasize with you feeling sensitive sometimes, as do I, I would have reacted and responded the same way you did. I actually feel a bit embarrassed about my first comment and not elaborating to begin with, it was pretty impulsive of me and I would have taken it as rude too. Again, thank you for allowing me to elaborate and being so understanding, it is another example of your strength, intelligence, and compassion! I hope peace and love find you everywhere you go! you are amazing! 🥰❤
None of the therapists have said there are different types of bpd so far except this video & I've been studying, trying to heal for over 10 YEARS. I deal with bpd some also thought bipolar type 2 as well at the start.
DBT really helps in understanding and coping with my BPD symptoms.
Greetings from Sweden 🇸🇪. I have difficulty to handle my Dpd, here in Sweden it’s difficult to find help to find a ground to reach out from . Thank u for your fantastic video
mostly discouraged but a little bit of the others im not diagnosed but im trying to see if i can get diagnosed
Hi^^thank you for this video. I have BPD and I can say all this types are one whole BPD for me as myself.
Man, everything makes so much sense now. Thank you for your videos
I am currently on a waitlist to get diagnosed, but this can take up to a year. I am so disheartened by this… Trying to learn as much as I can on my own now, because I feel so stuck in my mental health journey