BS! They don't not remember, they may forget a couple of things but they know damn well what they are doing. I know I have outbursts but oh I can't remember!
This is the best explanation I've heard. I like the words, complex trauma disorder, instead of borderline personality disorder. When I was younger, before being diagnosed, I literally thought I was insane. Until I found DBT, I was a ticking time bomb. I have BPD, CPTSD, SAD, severe depression and anxiety. I manage things much better these days, but the anger takes over at times. And it's always directed towards myself. I thank God every day because someone was looking out for me. It's such a difficult thing for me to even wrap my head around, and most of my family and friends don't understand. It's an everyday journey of love and compassion. Be kind, always. Thanks for this great video! ❤️
So glad he said our suicide attempts are not attention seeking threats. From my experience with many therapists and groups this is a concept they did not get and wrongfully diagnose people with BPD traits as borderline.
My girlfriend has bpd and I'm trying to understand her better she has a hard time explaining herself I'll love her no matter what thank you for opening my views and eyes on this thanks 🙏
Because complexity helps your self esteem..For people trying to understand what it is and how to be empathetic towards the person and the condition..Yes..simple.. to the point with no BS or prejudice. What a pompous statement in regards to an explanation of and not of a mental health condition..Classic yearning to be complex I assume..
I had a friend with BPD who I liked a lot and had a very close and personable relationship with who I can no longer associate with. Due to the anger and rage issues that they have displayed on me multiple times. I do understand they have a tough time controlling this, but I can no longer be around to protect my own mental health.
As someone with BPD, seeing this is honestly hard to read but I understand the reasoning behind. I just hope you know that your friend more than likely did not mean to hurt you. Which does not justify their actions.
I have adhd and I think I have borderline and/or am autistic as well. I honestly understand this. I have had friends and family who had it as well and I've been hurt by them. I've also lost a lot of friends too because of the way I am, it hurts but I know that it's my responsibility to get as well as I can and I'd rather them be happy away from me than miserable at my side. It's very isolating but as someone whose had to move on from people who used me I understand and I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself and your mental health. It is very difficult to control but it's not your responsibility to have to put up with abuse because of it. Edit: I don't get rage I mostly get sad/ depressed/clingy and emotionally dump. I know it can be very overwhelming amd draining to be around.
Its not so much the rage or anger that i couldnt deal with but rather the complete lack of empathy associated with the anger and rage that was a deal breaker for me. We all get angry but having empathy(the ability to consider the feelings and emotional needs of others) is what makes us human and not narcissist.
You may have been their FP, which if you were that could of caused their heightened emotions. I can't have friends myself because my BDP gets severe and they eventually leave because of what you described.
As a person diagnosed with bpd.. I agree one hundred percent with the speaker...Dr.. that the name or label needs change.. complex trauma disorder sounds easier on the ear if I'm explaining my psychosis to someone..without instant judgment.. I see it in their body language, and other ways.. Do it now!!!
I have a Masters degree in SW, and ironically, I never learned anything as helpful as this video in School or out of school. This video is really great. The video is a great summation.
I like the way he explains BPD. And I like his voice, someone's speaking voice can affect a person's mood, you know? His is very calming and clear. Thanks Dr. Rege.
My girlfriend and mother of my child was diagnosed as bipolar 1, which I believe to be accurate, but I also think she suffers from BPD. I’ve heard that it’s not uncommon to suffer from both. Impulsive and attention seeking behaviors, black/white thinking, identity changes, fear of abandonment, history of trauma (but as an adult), suicidal behavior and narcissistic traits, but there are times she seems so genuine and self aware.
I have BPD and am a psychology graduate, and since then I have done a *lot* of introspection and research (as well as being in therapy the whole time) so would say I'm very self-aware - but that doesn't always stop me from exhibiting the problematic behaviours and experiencing overwhelming affects and maladaptive thinking patterns, at least not all the time. One of the problems in BPD is a feeling of total dyscontrol as soon as emotions (invariably intense) appear. When I was doing DBT, in the group we would *always* be saying things like "I know I'm reading into it too much, but I can't shake the feeling that..." and the problem here is that that's in a slowed down and controlled therapeutic setting. In real life situations things move faster, emotions spiral out of control and there's not a therapist there to help you out, so you end up acting on the feeling despite still knowing on some level that you are splitting or being irrational, melodramatic, or narcissistic. Obviously that's something that is worked on in DBT but it takes time and practice.
I'm a guy who's family doesn't really "believe" in mental illness despite my mother having borderline and talk about Mental health is often dismissed but recently my friend had introduced me to his sister who had borderline and we started talking about her and what life is like for her and I related a lot which is rare for me because I often find myself tryna explain things but nobody really gets what I mean and so I told her about myself as well and she verbalized my feelings in ways that I never could and that was a first for me in my 17 years of life and so I decided to look into borderline and I'm not saying I have it but man all these videos are like a breath of fresh air in understanding myself and things actually make sense for once
It’s a personal difficulty with coping during difficult or expected situations. They struggle to be consistent and when a change or potential change appears it’s difficult to know what will really happen next
I am 52, and my BPD is very treatment resistant .. it must be. I’ve had a lot of the treatments listed consistently, ongoing, never with an interruption since I was 27. The only thing that even comes close to helping is avoidance of all close relationships. For some, it just lies dormant. I didn’t even know what I actually had going on for a long time, but I thought the volatile part was gone. Got in a relationship after 8 years of peace, and there it was. I was in complete shock.
as someone with bpd, I long to not feel how I feel...all of the time. Its horrible. Like sometimes Im afraid of myself. Makes me feel like a monster. It sucks and I wouldnt wish this on anyone. I wanna learn as much as possible so I can work on improving my behavior..like my anger and my difficulty understanding those grey areas of life. And to stop the flashbacks that makes me a monster (i have ptsd as well)
I thought I was the only one who called themself monster. I sometimes look forward to disassociating just to not think about how awful I really am. People tell me I’m a very kindhearted and sweet person all the time. I’m glad they can’t read my mind. I don’t fear death. I won’t kill myself but I won’t fight to stay either. Make any sense?
I was a psych nurse for 15 years before I became disabled. And because of all of the constant nastiness, I heard from nurses and doctors, I did not get help for my bipolar. I think I’m borderline as well, but I don’t know if I want that diagnosis. The stigma is absolutely horrible. And when you get hospitalized everyone automatically assumes you are a horrible
😔 man, its wild how caustic some of the people we are basically required to invest a lot of trust in can be. Hopefully videos like this one can help to move the needle away from stigmatizing conditions like bpd and bipolar; I think we've already seen massive improvements, on the bipolar end at least. You should check out Offir Sasson's bpd animation here on RUclips, I don't remember the title but its a really cool, empathetic look at the experience of having bpd that I personally found very moving. Love ya, stranger.
Lamotrigine actually does help a lot. The first few weeks it made me feel a bit sick, and even manic at times. After that as I went through 50mg, 75mg, 100mg twice daily over the months I had no SH incidents of life attempts. It won't cure you in anyway, but it makes my life easier.
i’ve recently been putting in a lot of effort into treating my possible CTD, so this video really means a lot to me. i appreciate the depths you went into to explain things, it makes everything seem more tolerable and less scary. thank you.
Iv done so much “self help” over the years! I always knew I wasn’t “right” i had a really abusive childhood and various other major trauma throughout my life and just thought i was bitter and angry (which i am also) getting diagnosed with BPD (CTD) last year FINALLY made sense why i am the way i am… i am at the very start of my CTD journey having a proper accurate diagnosis makes all the difference because at least we can work on it from a point of information and not theory and psychobabble. Good luck
Thank you for providing a fairly comprehensive and neutral definition of BPD. Almost impossible to find online. When asked by for eg a friend "what is BPD?" - it's not like this particular condition can be summed up in one sentence, right! I'm 3+yrs in remission and it's great to be able to share a link to this rather than try to explain. BPD's not only extremely complicated and misunderstood, but since recovering it's not a topic I particularly want to dwell very long on in a conversation. Thank you again.
Hi Dr Rege, yesterday I received a BPD diagnosis from my psychiatrist (as well as C-PTSD + my previous OCD & PMDD). I’ve been suffering for a very long time and one bothersome thing to note is a psychiatrist I had put “possible BPD” in my chart 3 years ago but I was never told that he did that until yesterday. I admit that I may not have taken that info well at the time but it’s been a lot more empowering to know in the long run. I wish someone would have just told me years ago. My social worker was the one who separately brought the possibility up to me 6 months ago and since then so much has clicked as I’ve been able to learn about myself and dive into the wealth of info available online + it’s been nice to just know there’s other people who are like me. I even watched this exact vid beforehand but had no idea BPD could apply to me. My psych has offered me Lamictal or Abilify to think about and decide what I’d like to take. Do you have links for info about comparisons, efficacy etc. I’m already on fluoxetine, LDN and valium which especially helps the agitation/anxiety. Just looking for help knowing what I should proceed with as there’s not much time to chat at psych appts. I’ve also heard Dr. Lois Choi Kain, a prominent BPD advocate speak about a recent study on Lamictal for BPD which says it had no greater effect than placebo… not sure if you’ve heard this?
Thank you for sharing. Re aripiprazole vs Lamotrigine - the choice is made based on what one is trying to achieve. Medications can’t necessarily change the construct of BPD which is why studies show no medication works - however this doesn’t mean that medication doesn’t help other comorbid symptoms that worsen the BPD construct e.g impulsivity. Lamotrigine is used in clinical practice and has beneficial effects on mood stability, racing thoughts, emotional dyscontrol and some evidence in reduction of self harm - however medication alone is not sufficient - the medication helps the individual to apply the psychological strategies. Re ari this has dual mechanisms at different doses and one should know what are the targets one is aiming for. Ps not advice
@@PsychiatrySimplified Thanks for your reply, yes precisely - I’m struggling with progressing in psychotherapy because of my dysregulatiom/anger/anxiety/obsessiveness that keeps getting triggered and derailing our work, hence why my provider wanted me to get my meds reviewed. Am currently awaiting a referral to a DBT group as well. I’m thinking based off of the little research I’ve done, I might try Lamictal first since it has fewer side effects and if I remember correctly - it has some kind of similarity to the mechanism of valium?… which already helps those symptoms immensely. Just difficult having my psych leave this decision to me without giving me more detailed info. 🙃🙈
My current psychiatrist thinks i might have BPD. I also have PCOS and hashimotos. This is the first I've heard of them being connected. Very interesting...
Psychedelics and meditation have greatly help me out. I am still very impulsive especially when it comes to money, but i used to have major mood swings to the point where I sabotage relationships
I'm only at the phase of coming up with a plan to get my wife to consider treatment. I wasn't totally aware of what BPD was until a therapist during one session asked me about our relationship which lead to discussing her behavior, which then lead to discussing her childhood. Immediately I was told this is "practically textbook" and was given a lot of of informal material and referred to a BPD Famliy support group. As someone with bipolar disorder I initially sought therapy was the way I was being treated was triggering ideation. Presently I'm getting help (and medcation) but I'm determined to find her help as well.
Do u love your wife? I’m asking this cause my ex bf left me because of my bpd related symptoms- which at that time neither of us were aware of the fact that I have bpd- so now I’m wondering if anyone ever is able to love me?
@@maryamhedayat7032 There are seriously times that I have to question it. Its better for me at times to feel that I dont love her, but will eventually- and sure enough I do. Sometimes people have been together for a long time can fan fall in and out of love repeatedly. Understanding that love isn't some magical spell give us more power. Contrary to what we've been told since childhood, being in love is both conditional and fleeting. Love does not live outside time, it's something you have to keep tending to. Taking care of my own mental health ensures that I will likely never completely stop loving her. Additionally, if it get to the point where she won't accept help and I have to break ties, I would at least do everything I could to make sure we ended on as good terms as possible if for no other reason but out of love and respect of the woman she once was.
Yes it can due to the fronto limbic dysfunction being exacerbated. Here is an article covering BpD but also Neuroendocrine and neurobiological aspects psychscenehub.com/psychinsights/borderline-personality-disorder/
Yes it can due to the fronto limbic dysfunction being exacerbated. Here is an article covering BpD but also Neuroendocrine and neurobiological aspects psychscenehub.com/psychinsights/borderline-personality-disorder/
Even if it's not easy you would like to stay without treatment? No one with mental illness should stay without treatment, someone if stays without treatment might take their own life it's a serious thing
They told me I have EUPD, I didn't realise at first this was the same thing.. It's been there my whole adult life.. Ive had a cpn for about a year now.. and I still struggle dealing with my emotions! I have not been able to get over a relationship I had 3 years ago.. it doesn't help I have a child with that person.. so they are still present alot in my life. My emotions are so intense and I struggle to rationalise things in my life.. I have hallucinations when things get really intense.. Queitapine and lamictal have helped my mood swings.. I can't take ssri as they make my slightly manic.. I hope new medications come to the market as I am on the last ones! I've tried over ten during my life.. I feel so disconected and feel like I am watching a movie and have no control over my actions.. I've actually just went for a walk and ended up jumping on a train and traveling across the country and trying to live on the streets for no reason! This led to a hospital stay for a month! I've watch this to get a reminder of my diagnosis.. It's helped me see my issues again.. so difficult to treat in my case.. I do DBT.. I hope everybody is coping with their own diagnosis!
I have so much compassion and empathy for anyone going through this and other mental illnesses, I struggle with other illnesses myself. All the best, you will find help keep pushing keep pushing keep pushing.
I was diagnosed at age 16 & never knew if it was correct. I fit most of these except I have way too MUCH empathy (it literally hurts sometimes), and I've never had anger issues or been inappropriately hostile--in fact, I've always been excessively passive. And I'm not super extreme in how I communicate/interact with people, just extreme in how I feel & experience things. Some mental health professionals say I definitely have BPD, others say no way. Idk what to think.
Sometimes labels don’t help - aim is to identify if the patterns of behaviour are causing personal and interpersonal distress . One can address them via psychotherapy irrespective .
If you have real empathy witch means beaing able to relate to how others feel and stopping yourself self before gaslighting to the point that any normal person would be suicidal from all the out right lies that you just said. Then you don't have bpd. When the borderline line rage kicks in they are ruthless. Hit me up if you have any questions.
@@jasonscott7527 Wow. What a bizarre response. 1) I've never gaslit anyone, ever. Gaslighting is horrible and it's abuse. 2) What specifically was it I said that you think are lies, and why? More importantly, who are you to tell ME what is or was not my experience? Seems pretty arrogant to me, unless I'm misunderstanding something.
I think my wife has BPD. Her behavior became much more erratic during pregnancy and recently she has become violent toward me (3 years later). She is seeing a psychiatrist. I am not sure what she discusses with him; he has put her on anti-depressants. It is becoming very difficult for me. I feel the best way to live with her is to avoid each other.
I have PCOS and a strong suspicion I have BPD. The stigma attached to it is what I’m most afraid of. It makes me feel like a bad person. the worst symptom I have and identify with most is the idealization of someone and then the devaluation. It happens so quickly, and even though I know I’m jumping to conclusions I can’t turn it off. Usually I cope by just writing out a rant and deleting it later. I try to keep it to myself because I know it’s not normal.
There is a strong association between PCOS, thyroid autoimmunity and BPD. This is usually linked to trauma and HPA axis dysfunction. This feeds into aspects such as PMDD, emotional dysregulation and personality dysfunction if pervasive and enduring. Covered in more detail here - psychscenehub.com/psychinsights/polycystic-ovarian-syndrome-psychiatry-psychiatrist-know/
@@Serrenoa I’m wanting someone to talk to about this sort of thing, I feel so alone when I’m experiencing symptoms but I don’t feel like I have a right to go to the forums meant for people with BPD since I don’t have an official diagnosis. so please feel free message me if you want to talk. And I’m willing to listen too of course. Maybe we can be friends. I’ll put some info as to how you can reach me in my bio.
I am in a relationship and live with a man with BPD. He was diagnosed as a child alone with Agoraphobia . He is not in treatment or on meds and I go through hell. He becomes very suspicious and does not trusts me or anyone . When he rages it’s a horrible sight . He never lets me go anywhere alone because he fears abandonment and thinks I will cheat . I believe he has paranoid personality disorder with it . He has no friends and doesn’t keep in touch with family . He was molested as a child and was in and out of foster care because his mother was on drugs until she died . I’ve worked as a therapist for years and never thought I would end up with a person like the people I treat . I’m on the brink of leaving him. When he “splits” and disassociates it’s the worst !!!
It is the worst and I feel for you. I have borderline myself. I cannot tell you how awful I feel when I dissociate and push people away. Mine is not as bad as his sounds. I can keep it under control. I was also a victim of SA and other abuses. Basically it is that the person you trusted the most in the world did not protect you and you develop these coping mechanism. I would say to you, if he does not get treatment ASAP, run as far you can. Because he will never change and you deserve to have peace.
@@hollystiener16 wow thank you for reply to me. Yea his May be worse than yours . I broke up with him yesterday but we still love together . I felt sorry for him today because he texted that he was feeling down and was hungry . I have him sleeping at a friends house since Friday . I do miss him being in the bed at night . My final straw was when I just had relatives visiting from out of town for 3 days . My female cousins . He was really sad that I had to spend a lot of time with them . Only 2 of the days he really he was not wit us . He had a meltdown and kept texting me that he misses me . Then when they left he turned into the devil and yelled at me when I set my alarm saying that I was texting other men and I’m a cheater . I told him that I was simply setting my alarm in my phone . It turned me off and he slept on the couch . He was very loud and in my face . I got scared . I know it was his coping mechanism and all he really wanted to say was “hey baby you’re my favorite person and when you were gone with your family I felt alone and I missed you and now that they’re gone please hold me close” . But instead he lashed out and now I’m leaving him and it’s very sad .
@@soyicasweet99 You are very brave to distance yourself. I feel for you. Because I know how he is hurting you. We do this push-pull thing. There is a book called, I Love You, I Hate You, Don't Leave Me. The title pretty much sums it up. Anyone gets too close and we must push. Anyone gets too far and we must pull. To us, closeness and leaving feel like a matter of life and death. It is that traumatising. Intimacy and trust is a risk that is too high for us. As children we could not count on our parents and we needed too. He feels unloved, unworthy, and unvalued. And no amount of love, patience, and acceptance that you can give, or anyone for that matter, will help him. I have had the best boyfriends on the planet and they could not help me. I am finally going to get some serious help for mine now. I am terrified of doing and wonder if it will even work. I am so embarrassed that I have it, even though it is not my fault. I spent a few days with someone that I like and I acted terribly. I am very happy that you are taking care of yourself because he will not change without treatment and even then it could take years. I am sorry that it is so hard.
@@hollystiener16 wow . Thanks for your kind words ! Everything that you said sums up his behavior completely . His mother was on drugs his whole life and he was in and out of foster care . He was molested as well. So I can see how that trauma affected him and they way he thinks . He has seen a lot as a child . When he needed his mother most she was not there . I can imagine the pain he felt as a child. He is not close with his father and when he did live with him as a child , the girlfriend abused him and he was taken away . He doesn’t have friends due to the push and pull thing he does . Yes I heard of that book you’re talking about too. I am so proud of you for getting treatment . I wish he would do that . The furthest I got was having him watch a few videos . It gets painful for him after awhile when they talk about trauma and he switches to something else . I know I have to leave him but as a mental health professional myself , it makes me feel bad that I couldn’t have at least got him in treatment . I think I will do videos on my channel on what it’s like dating someone with BPD. I was private about it but I think I may be able to help others .
@@soyicasweet99 He has certainly had it rough and rougher than I had it, which I can't even imagine that. It took me years to watch videos because it is like retraumatizing and then you feel so much shame. You are so sweet that you feel bad, but it is okay and you can feel bad from a distance. Send him lots of love and pray for him. Funny, I am thinking of doing youtube videos on my journey with recovering from this. Been thinking for a few days. Or maybe a podcast. You absolutely should do videos and you can help people to understand, but also to know to walk away.
I had a partner suffering from this disorder. There was no way to convince her to be aware of it, let alone to go to the therapy. I felt sad and weak because i cdnt help. After we split up she ended up in a horrific relationship with a person who suffers from a dissociative disorder. And persisted in it. She used to have turbulent and toxic relationships in the past as well but it seems that i was sort of exception BUT she didnt stop trying to make our relationship seem to her previous relationships and it frustrated me a lot. A didnt want to live in that type of hell: a mixture of intense emotions, love-hate status, fights, paranoia etc.
I love this man. He is the only person who gives a real and sympathetic view of BPD. Love the way he admits we get bad press and unfairly yreated. Professionals act like we are a pain an inconvenience and a waste of a hospital bed. They would prefer to help any other mentally patient but us. We are just a nhs number to them. In my opinion our suicide would simply be a casual statistic nothing else.. i was told that i should get used to constant suicide attempts and that would be my main mptom for the rest of my life but would not merit hospitalisation because I keep surviving and basically i would have to die to be took seriously...so i said ther🎉e would only be one problem... I would not get the help then either..unless i come back to haunt them lol. Love to all you BPD survivors xxc
I had undiagnosed BPD for decades because I was just a pretty face on the outside who couldn’t possibly have problems and yet was outcast. The world is hypocrites literally you’re ridiculed by therapists for not having emotions or naming feelings and then completely shunned for then having said emotions. There’s no way through this. Like anything is suddenly going to help now. They don’t know that it’s not who the person is it could be anyone…anyone is an enemy.
I am being assessed next month as i strongly suspect i have BPD too. I realised the other day, like a light switch turned ON in my head. It was both a relief but scary. Scary at the thought its been ME causing everyone so much pain yet for years ive thought i was the victim and my outbursts were justified. They were not. I am with a beautiful man now who understands i show all 9 traits and is standing by me. This is both such a safe feeling, but so much pressure as im scared im going to switch by being triggered, so im watching what i say, do, its exhausting. Did you get your diagnosis? and if so, how did you feel before and after please anyone? xx
You could consider an assessment - even online questionnaires - however if significant then a psychological or psychiatric assessment can provide more detail.
Thank you for that suggestion. We have added it to the list. There are fascinating nee developments re stuttering in neurobiology and treatment. We will aim to do this
One thing I dislike here is the constant association of BPD with females, even in this video, you see illustrations of females. I am a male with BPD due to a stressful and unstable childhood of emotional and verbal abuse, physical violence in the home, inconsistent treatment from caregivers, and inappropriate behavior by caregivers exhibited around me and when interacting with me. Males get BPD too, and are often misdiagnosed, or not properly diagnosed at all. Males with BPD also have a higher rate and risk of suicide. Having BPD constantly associated with females, both in discussion and things like the illustrations in this presentation, does not help.
Yes you are correct ! Point taken. There does tend to be a gender bias ( neurobiologically) and societally but you are correct that the gender bias should be minimised
I’m confused. I feel an abundance of empathy. Possibly even to much. I’ve spent many hours contemplating rather or not it’s actually projection. Also have spent many therapy hours on recognizing the difference. I do identify with everything else mentioned. I’m told I’m a “perfect borderline”. I understand that means I have every symptom listed in the diagnose criteria.
I’m shocked. I have Hoshimotos disease (a thyroid disorder) I also have had to have an opherectomy (my ovaries removed) due to PCOS. I also have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. I am 46 years old. I was diagnosed with BPD 17 years ago. Yet, this is the first time I’ve ever been told that there’s a correlation between all three of my conditions.
trying to educate myself on these things, i’m waiting for my momma to hurry and get me therapist so i could possibly get an diagnosis. i’m only 15 and constantly trying to figure out if i’m struggling with mental health on my own is so tiring.
It’s going to be hard to get a diagnosis at 15 I’m not going to lie. I just got diagnosed at 24 and even then they consider it “too young”. I started seeking help at 19 and it took me 5 years to get my clinical diagnosis. 😭
At that age there's lots of change in hormone so there would be many oveflapped symptons of different issues. Regards of the diagnosis, you could still find some good method to cope with the symptons, being mindful is very important. Wish you all the best.
Normal adolescent development includes temporary elevated emotionality and reactivity, because the limbic system has a growth spurt before the frontal Cortex (logic and reasoning and planning etc). If you have health insurance maybe you can call and schedule your own treatment on your own? If not, the library or book store likely have helpful workbooks on BPD or just try a CBT workbook to help. Lots of good little books on trauma too if needed. Getting on top of it now is a good sign you can grow and develop into who you want to be. Also please consider nutrition and the gut-brain axis. Wheat inflames the brain in everyone and will worsen everyone, some worse than others. Dairy and sugar and other refined carbs can be a problem. Also a vegan diet (I was a raw food vegan for a decade) is a horrible idea for having a strong body and healthy brain. There really are proteins and fats you need missing from plant foods… and plants dont want to die and scream on a polygraph when threatened… most of them are full of toxins like oxalates and lectins and cause progressively more problems in Humans. Best wishes!
I always wondered if my sister is BPD . Maybe a narcissist But she seems to be emphatic and she loves her family. But her house is so clean she's obsessed about weight used to drink take speed. Has tried to commit suicide. The thing that made me think of this Is she cheated on her husband but when caught. Said he cheated all the time not true
Unfortunately this is my girlfriend of three years absolutely getting on my last nerve and I don't think i'm going to be able to put up with any longer
Thanks for the feedback. There is treatment for this condition and it is treatable and the prognosis is good. Marsha linehan who developed DBT herself had BPD and she has recently written a book.
Lamictal was a wash for me. Lithium helps. It IS used for treatment resistant depression. BUT... I'm almost certainly not bipolar... Major depression, PTSD from childhood, a dash of dissociative symptoms related to stressful moments, a lot of fear of romantic relationships (honestly, I and my ex tried really hard to make our marriage work... It was SO painful at the end.💔 And now I'm afraid. Pretty straightforward, not even a reaction exclusive to the bearers of brain cooties. ) I don't have all the criterion for BPD. I used to have pretty much all the criteria. Diagnosis is in contemplation.
Bipolar and bod often go together. Why would u take lithium if not bipolar? I have both BP and BPD and the lithium prevents psychosis. Tbh the symptoms of each are very similar, especially mania and bpd, although one is a mood disorder and one a personality disorder.
For BPD in general with mood swings evidence based treatments include DBT which has a component of emotional regulation. It is also important to rule out mild bipolarity which if present responds well to a mood stabiliser. Ps not medical advice
Dont tell him to “calm down” lol that is the thing that is most likely to trigger me more! I guess just reassure him it will pass if he takes a minute and gets his breathing under control, i would suggest leaving him alone and not trying to solve the issue in that moment as i know i need time to calm and reflect before i can discuss what happened and able to move forward. Good luck
@@sashas3979 well you shouldn’t have to, just because someone has a diagnosis does not give them permission to abuse the people closest to them, its one thing to be angry but another thing altogether when it turns into domestic abuse. You can’t save everyone and in this instance i would say, you need to leave for your own sanity, nobody wants to go down with a sinking ship, if he doesn’t talk to you about WHY he does what he does then he isnt even seeking treatment or help and taking it out on you is just an easy way to vent his frustration, you are not his punch bag. It IS possible to control your moods (at least for me) towards the people i love (my son) is the only person i dont rage at so it is possible to keep it under control. To be more specific he may be pushing you away to “prove himself right” that EVERYONE leaves (dont forget one of BPD symptoms is extreme fear of abandonment) but the irony is we push these people in our lives to PROVE its true, even though its our outrageous behaviour which makes it happen! Please look after yourself. Sending best wishes x
I am trying to sort this out. I see all these traits in my spouse. Behaviors also To me it seems certain. Emotional dysregulation for sure You never really know who they will be when you walk in the door. Immense anger that can hang on for days and a self righteous certainty about things. Very conspiratorial
I had a horrible psychiatrist. I'm not familiar with the stigma but this does explain so much of what I've been through after the diagnosis. I didn't think it fit me well enough, so I guess the diagnosis was the last fuck you from her.
i present many bpd symptoms and have family with bpd too. i really think i might have bpd, but the fact that i am 16 years old and live in a country with poor mental health care makes it difficult to know where to look to try and get a diagnosis. :(
Sorry to hear. Difficult to provide guidance if mental health care if not present. Hopefully you can find some professionals that can help address this.
You know she said some things in the past about this but I've never looked into it, but now that I look into it this is one hundred percent her, she's non-medicated she's not stable and she has six children to take care of. It's everyday with you don't love me when we fight she gets very intense she's thrown her phone at my face before she is very very very intense like she wants me to put my hands on her or something like that because she's had that trouble in the past, One minute she's happy one minute she's telling me she, " fucking hates me. " I also understand how everybody has their own things going on but like I said i've been dealing with this for three years and it hasn't gotten any better. She's always ridiculing everybody she calls everybody retards. I'm just venting so I do apologize but any reaction or engagement is good engagement. Very informative stuff dr. Happy holidays. 😊
Sure understand. it's a difficult situation. Generally its good to get an assessment - as hormonal issues like thyroid autoimmunity and PCOS can coexist and exacerbate mood states. If one recognises it and can get psychotherapy to address emotional dysregulation, then it can be effective.
Are there any studies showing if Ability is helpful in BPD? With comorbidities of depression and anxiety, already on an SSRI this would often be something I might think of using, but there is no mention of it in BPD here. Great video. Thank you.
It really depends on what one is trying to target. So aripiprazole when prescribed the question is what part of BPD is one trying to target. It's difficult to answer that as aripiprazole is also dose-dependent in its action. Lower dose activation, higher dose reduction of agitation or mood stabilisation and antipsychotic effects
Thank you Doctor, this has been eye-opening, even if a little uncomfortable for me. I'm shortly going for an ADHD assessment, which is why I've been trying to learn more about it, and it has led me here. I don't think I have ADHD, PTSD I'm pretty sure of, but now after watching this and other videos on BPD, I wonder if this has been the issue all along. I'm a 46 year old woman, diagnosed bulimic, and diagnosed with mixed anxiety and depressive disorder. I have zero self worth, I shut myself off from family and friends, and I've only had 1 serious relationship because I know that eventually, they're going to treat me badly and end the relationship. My family exclude me from things, I recently found out they have a WhatsApp group I'm not a part of. I don't believe my thoughts to be paranoia when people actively treat me differently/negatively, and I keep leaving jobs because I don't fit in. I know it's not my job to give the psychiatrist pointers, but I wonder if all of this would be better explained as BPD instead of ADHD. Any suggestions very gratefully received.
There is an overlap between BPD and ADHD because of the emotional arousal phenotype that occurs in ADHD in females. So one should consider this as a formulation rather than ask if it’s one or the other. The symptoms of adhd and bpd arise from dysfunction of prefrontal cortex and the amygdala arousal. You can learn more in this video where I go into more detail Psychiatrist Analyzes Psychologist Testimonies in the Amber Heard vs J.Depp trial | Trauma Disorders ruclips.net/video/XG5DKbR-H5k/видео.html
Very informative! I think that my cousin suffers from BDP and I think that short term hospitalization might be the best possible solution at the moment, because she is dealing with very unstable relationship which causes high level of stress and very unstable behaviour. I would like to approach her with the suggestion that she would be better off at the hospital at the moment, where she can get a starting point for understanding her own condition and how it can be treated. The problem is that she is not aware that she is dealing with a condition rather than with a bad relationship. Do you maybe have some advice on how to get closer to her so that I can communicate this idea? I would not mention BDP at all, maybe that is not the issue after all, but hospitalization is the only way for her to start taking care of her mental health, hopefully. The other big problem is the enviorment in which the issues with mental health are really stigmatized and as the condition progresses, she is draging more and more people into that ambyss because she is not able to regulate anything by herself, and it is a complete chaos at the moment with a lot of people sharing opinions without being aware at all that it is the last thing she really needs now. No relevant support at all! Any sort of advice would be much appreciated. I will make an appointment with her psychiatrist too, to share these thoughts as it seems that her doctor is not informed about a lot of things that happen in between sessions (once in two months).
Thanks for you comment. It is a difficult one to answer. In general one can raise these issues openly and honestly framing it as a part of care and concern for the individual. However this doesn't not always work. Being part of treatment by providing information to psychiatrist can help as that can then be addressed by the psychiatrist. Ps not medical advice.
@@PsychiatrySimplified Thanks for your response doctor! I will share my idea for hospitalization with her paychiatrist then and update them on her condition in the past few days. I think that she is not sharing all the mood swings and intensity of it with her doctor whatsoever, which could be relevant. All the best 🙌🏻
I was diagnosed bipolar for 8 years now they changed it to ubpd it bothers me the change as it should b the same.but your explanation does ring true .I am very hostile and aggressive to protect myself but actually care to much I've been waiting 8 half years now for dbt on the isle of wight .
I’m 50 yo. I’ve always “felt” like I was “off” compared to most. Anyway after all this time and thanks to the Internet information is more prolific than it used to be. My point is I’m 99.99% sure that I have BPD. Ok great! HOWEVER, I live in Southern New Jersey. The closest DBT therapist is in New York, a 3 Hour drive!. Is there any hope for me with a regular psychotherapist or do you think that would be a complete waste of time??.. I’ve been in and out of therapy since I was six years old. (mostly out!)…
Today I was assessed, I thought I just had CPTSD, now processing the possibilities of BPD as well as Covid PTSD. Taken years but today was accepted for 18mths of MBT, to include, group, 121 and trauma on the NHS. Have you found anyone yet Mike?
Yes absolutely. To prevent harm to self emotionally the relationships may be superficial and may end in a shorter period for fear of being hurt or abandoned.
Thanks I'm currently being tested for bpd or bi polar. What I have explained in my comment is how I am. I run away or sabotage the relationship. I think it's so I can feel some form of control over situations in my life.
Doctor such a pro Video , I am a care giver , have a family member Diagnosed with BPD twenty years ago now stabilized with valproic and some other medications by a Psychiatric doc After Many years of researching on the Internet I discovered as you mention hormones dysfunctions can be a cause would you please elaborate in Detail about hormones in mental Health Why hasn‘t medicine Till yet invested more Research about it ? I am 53 on HRT Most Mood Symptoms in premenopause and Menopause can be cured with neurosteroids , Is this a futuristic approach to mental Health ? Thanks for sharing your knowledge blessings
My wife is diagnosed with BPD she is violent towards me. She has mood swings alot. I took her to psychiatrist and he prescribed her 2 medicines Sertraline and Risperidone and escalated us to have sessions with a psycologist! My question is that is it curable ?
It is treatable and treatment improves interpersonal functioning . BPD requires psychotherapy and specific kinds of treatments include DBT , schema therapy, mentalisation based therapy and transference focused therapy. Evidence suggests that the components of BPD improve over time and the condition can go into remission.
Usually - best starting point is to have an assessment with a general practitioner and discuss the issues. As medical aspects also need to be ruled out. Then an assessment by a psychiatrist/psychologist can provide further input. There are treatments for this condition. Wish you well.
Or it could be the exact opposite. The way you view yourself with BPD can lead to self harm or self medicating with things like drugs, alcohol, or food. I didn’t have any issues with those things when I first started showing real signs of BPD but developed problems as a way to self medicate because I didn’t understand what was actually going on with me.
Hi there, Thank you for this explanation it’s very helpful I once around 10 years ago had a therapist make generalised suggestions that I could have BPD. She would use terms with me such as ‘splitting’ and ‘identity disturbance’. When I asked her outright if I had a personality disorder, she didn’t answer me directly. I have in the last year seen a therapist, but for a physical rehabilitation program for chronic fatigue. In the program, your given very brief, short, therapeutic support. Again, I asked if I had BPD and the therapist just said I didn’t have it because I’ve held down a job and have awareness. My question is, can you struggle with identity disturbance and not have BPD? I don’t act out, I don’t have rage, I keep very quiet, and try to better myself. However I loose my identity at the drop of a hat, and I can feel highs like I’m touching heaven when I’m doing something I love, or feel such anxiety or sadness when under stress that my jaw goes very tight and I can’t find words to speak. But, despite such emotional sensitivity, I don’t struggle with severe mood swings and haven’t ever received any feedback from family or friends to say I do Obviously, I have to find diagnosis in person. However, I just wondered if it’s possible to experience identity crises and not have a personality disorder? Thanks for reading my long comment :) x
i would see if i could get a diagnosis other than from just your therapist. the symptoms you described can still resonate as bpd. best of luck on your journey !!
I can aknowledge the impairments of self- disintegration of identity, change of directions, lack of decisiveness and commitment. But I am not hostile and tumultuous in relationships. I tend to isolate. Any thoughts?
People have a range of traits. These criteria are a guide only. People fluctuate. A disorder is on my present when it causes significant distress and impacts other domains of individuals life. Have a look at the amber heard video we did.
You can change the names but you can't change people and you can't change reality. That label is in part designed to determine how the individual labeled is to be treated from that point on. If that person is treated badly as a result so be it. Perhaps their behavior rightfully incites their own alienation or they are innocent. It almost doesn't matter when considering the, "now what", of the situation because people like to pick out one of their own and burn them at the stake on occasion. In life whether you're a man or woman someone will decide to label you with whatever pejorative term that happens to fit their narrative and agenda. This will very likely effect how you are going to be treated. It's not fair but it's just a part of life. People have been calling each other names since the spoken word and slinging 💩 before that. Unfortunately it's impossible to dodge every turd that's aimed at you but being aware of the situation helps to prepare for it. I'm not a fan of the Soft language especially in a professional setting because it's completely deceptive. Multiple names for one thing seems to be about confusing the individual tasked with disambiguation and it's sketchy. An example of this might be seeing, "evaporated cane juce", on an ingredients list at the store. Another classic example is how people could get by with stuff back in the day by changing their name. There's something really dishonorable and unsportsmanlike to change up the terminology in attempt to bypass what has integrated itself into common sense. People should be allowed the chance to defend and properly represent themselves. Awareness (common sense) of the situation that they walk into seems necessary for that. I want to add that the sentiment of sparing feelings and all is nice. I have no doubt that there are people in the field with a benevolent attitude but the notion of it is little more than fumbling an attempt at compassion. The seeds of good intention might sprout but won't survive because the environment is inhospitable.
Potentially - anger dyscontrol , impulsivity , aggression are indicators of increased Mesolimbic amygdala activation - could be exacerbated through reduced prefrontal cortex inhibition of the limbic system
Can you tell me something please? Something that I feel, if I knew, might help the healing process. I was s/a when I was 3 years old and I remember feeling jealousy for the very first time at the age of 5. This jealousy has continued throughout my adult life whenever I've been in a relationship. For the last 6 years I've avoided having a relationship, that was, up until August this year, when I met my partner. I'm 100% certain he will always be faithful, that's not an issue for me, what I can't bare is him seeing an attractive woman, on the street, on TV, social media, newspapers etc. I The thought of him being aroused, and distracted even for a second, crucifies me (and that's no exaggeration!). I'm sure it stems from the s/a. I have to add, I was neglected emotionally by my parents, they had me late in life and I always felt I was most probably an accident. I feel that I probably 'jumped'on the attention I received from the family member who assaulted me, because of the neglect and when they told me they loved my sisters, I felt this intense jelousy since they were a threat to the attention I was getting. Does this theory sound right to you? I'm 52 now and jealousy and fear are destroying a relationship with a man who I believe, genuinely loves me. I never see myself in terms of qualities, always in terms of sexiness. My partner says he wishes I could see the person he sees - loving, funny, caring etc. I've asked for help and been told I've a year to wait. Being in a relationship on a daily basis is unbearable most days with constant intrusive thoughts, but I don't want my past to win.
@@arabellacox sorry to hear. You seem to have a good psychological understanding. Psychological therapy individual and or connived can help further understanding and can provide strategies . Imago counselling - their book is considered a good book to help with relationships
Yes. For Kernberg, narcissistic - NPDs are a subtype of borderline personality disorders. Pathological narcissism can only occur after the development of a self in which good and bad object representations have become integrated into a unified self-concept, whereas borderline personalities develop their pathology at a developmental stage prior to the development of stable ego boundaries.
Do you think that a lot of people with this disorder have ADHD as well? Like they have ADHD to begin with and they developed BPD as a a result of trauma?
Very good question. I’ve covered it in reasonable detail in the video link at end. . The answer is yes , depends and is also more common in females the combined adhd + bpd. This was the discussion in the Amber heard case What Mental Health Disorder Did Amber Heard Have? Exploring PTSD, BPD, & Complex PTSD ruclips.net/video/XG5DKbR-H5k/видео.html
My family has many people with untreated personality disorders, schizophrenia, autism, mood disorders and it passes on down the line. I feel like the entire lineage is cursed. Imagine calling a shit ton of loners,black sheeps and rejects a “family.” So much damage done a lot of our younger generation has already died. I notice women that come have children with the family die. Not a drop of love in any of the family the only time they join together is when they have a common enemy aka me. The black sheep of the black sheeps 😂 I call them out on all their bullshit and sometimes it comes out in the form of extreme rage. I’m tired of being walked all over and kicked by a bunch of fucking bullies. Then I also went out and had a child with a guy that has almost a mirrored family to mine. I feel smothered by toxicity
Just diagnosed this Thursday after 11 years of being told it’s manic bipolar and depression when the psychiatrist said it was not possible to diagnose a child with it lmaooooo all those drugs for absolutely nothing
My mom has this disorder as well as other mental issues I've seen the decline in my moms mental health and now its physical I have so much empathy for my mom even though I had to walk away it's been almost 3 years sense I seen or spoken to her unfortunately she refuses to get any medical help because she is absolutely terrified of people judging her even though she hasn't said why but until she gets helps she will continue to fall my mom lost her house her job her husband her family she lost financially spiritually emotionally and mentally everything has been stripped away and its absolutely nothing I can do to help her it's so sad I truly think my mom is killing herself at this point bpd is no joke when it is untreated,I also believe she is a full blown narcissist and possessed by a demonic spirit..I say that because my mom started getting into witchcraft and dark magic randomly with no knowledge of what shes doing she roams the streets late at night for no reason and sold her car and all her belongings even though she needed it I'm terrified of her and for her,shes all over the place,she cant drive cook clean nothing she wasn't always this bad but it got worse and worse and worse she is a danger to herself and me and the people who love her..its like shes not in control of her own thoughts or body any more I've never seen anything like this in a human being I never thought this would happen to my mom..
How do I not push people away? I really want to open myself up to a loving romantic relationship but I close myself off from people for fear they’ll abandon me.
Good question. Psychotherapy can really help. Usually trauma underlies these responses with defences. So schema are present that prevents attachment for fear of abandonment and rejection and further emotional regulation aspects keep the sympathetic system on high threat. DBT / schema therapy can help address these that can help reform stable attachments.
When you feel like splitting on your partner, isolate yourself for couple of days and do nothing. When feelings of dread are gone than you can think logically and not leave your significant other.... that is for start :)
It is a really good question. It is challenging sometimes for someone to recognise that help is available. In order for that the initial step comes from the person recognising that they are experiencing a mental illness that is treatable. In some cases it takes time, encouragement can help/ them discussing with the doctor can help. Ultimately no easy answers. Wish you well
Recently diagnosed was put forward for “life skills” course showed signs of my BPD and the women running the course did NOT work through my feelings and found it unacceptable that someone would show symptoms of the very disorder they are diagnosed with. How is that even helpful!??
This can be feedback provided to the therapists. It's important to recognise that therapy involves a therapist - patient relationship - and in that relationship the patient can / should be able to express issues arising in therapy. Hope this helps.
@@PsychiatrySimplified i told her at the time that i wasnt going to apologise for being triggered thats the nature of the beast and you would think professionals would understand that? I was really hopeful for this course but i quit on the spot and they didn’t even try to convince me otherwise
@@Tsunami1.618 sorry to hear. For BPD - therapists should be experienced in at least basic skills of dbt. Not all psychologists are dbt trained. The evidence based treatment for BPD is DBT. There are others but DBT has most evidence of efficacy.
@@PsychiatrySimplified i know the change had to come from me i understand that and im pretty emotionally mature in most areas and felt a bit advanced for the group as i was talking about realisations i had had and they were like “oh we cover that in week 5” blah blah and it felt like i was messing up the order of their course and they didnt like it. Anyway back to the drawing board again! Im 48 now and im sick of this shit.
Good question. Personality disorders are divided into multiple types. According to Shedler - The term “borderline” dates back to a time when psychiatric classification distinguished primarily between neurotic and psychotic disturbance based on intact versus impaired reality testing. Over time, clinical writers began describing patients on the “border,” who seemed neither neurotic nor psychotic. The diagnostic construct has evolved, but the term “borderline” remains. See here the debate between the diagnoses - This is the Amber heard video where the psychologists disagreed. ruclips.net/video/XG5DKbR-H5k/видео.html
it is not a psychodynamic term... it originates from psychoanalysis - neurosis - psychosis - and another group of people would not fit in the previous categories proper... so the term... at the border of psychosis...but not really psychotic etc.....
As a person with BPD. As I've had self-discovery the most surprising trait was my lack of memory during an outburst.
Interesting you mention this - it is common ; individuals may feel dissociated during these outbursts.
I used to hate it because of things that would he brought up during my outbursts that I wouldn’t remember 😢
I've had that blackout. 😲 😱
Sounds pretty convenient to me…🤔
BS! They don't not remember, they may forget a couple of things but they know damn well what they are doing. I know I have outbursts but oh I can't remember!
This is the best explanation I've heard. I like the words, complex trauma disorder, instead of borderline personality disorder.
When I was younger, before being diagnosed, I literally thought I was insane. Until I found DBT, I was a ticking time bomb. I have BPD, CPTSD, SAD, severe depression and anxiety. I manage things much better these days, but the anger takes over at times. And it's always directed towards myself. I thank God every day because someone was looking out for me. It's such a difficult thing for me to even wrap my head around, and most of my family and friends don't understand. It's an everyday journey of love and compassion. Be kind, always. Thanks for this great video! ❤️
Thank you for your feedback. I really appreciate it . Glad you have been able to get the right treatment . Wish you well.
When you are overly sensitive - the very term - Borderline Personality Disorder is painfull in itself.
Complex Trauma Disorder feels easier.
So glad he said our suicide attempts are not attention seeking threats. From my experience with many therapists and groups this is a concept they did not get and wrongfully diagnose people with BPD traits as borderline.
My girlfriend has bpd and I'm trying to understand her better she has a hard time explaining herself I'll love her no matter what thank you for opening my views and eyes on this thanks 🙏
Thank you for your feedback wish you and your Gf well
Leave now
Excellent explanation- love how respectful and non-judgmental this is.
As someone who has BPD and has friends with BPD the words “borderline personality disorder simplified” made me literally laugh out loud.
I see what you mean 😁
Yes! Bit of an oxymoron! 😄
Because complexity helps your self esteem..For people trying to understand what it is and how to be empathetic towards the person and the condition..Yes..simple.. to the point with no BS or prejudice. What a pompous statement in regards to an explanation of and not of a mental health condition..Classic yearning to be complex I assume..
I had a friend with BPD who I liked a lot and had a very close and personable relationship with who I can no longer associate with. Due to the anger and rage issues that they have displayed on me multiple times. I do understand they have a tough time controlling this, but I can no longer be around to protect my own mental health.
Yes understand. It's not an easy situation.
As someone with BPD, seeing this is honestly hard to read but I understand the reasoning behind. I just hope you know that your friend more than likely did not mean to hurt you. Which does not justify their actions.
I have adhd and I think I have borderline and/or am autistic as well. I honestly understand this. I have had friends and family who had it as well and I've been hurt by them. I've also lost a lot of friends too because of the way I am, it hurts but I know that it's my responsibility to get as well as I can and I'd rather them be happy away from me than miserable at my side. It's very isolating but as someone whose had to move on from people who used me I understand and I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself and your mental health. It is very difficult to control but it's not your responsibility to have to put up with abuse because of it.
Edit: I don't get rage I mostly get sad/ depressed/clingy and emotionally dump. I know it can be very overwhelming amd draining to be around.
Its not so much the rage or anger that i couldnt deal with but rather the complete lack of empathy associated with the anger and rage that was a deal breaker for me. We all get angry but having empathy(the ability to consider the feelings and emotional needs of others) is what makes us human and not narcissist.
You may have been their FP, which if you were that could of caused their heightened emotions. I can't have friends myself because my BDP gets severe and they eventually leave because of what you described.
I have bpd. It was worse when a teen but I've noticed it being manageable as I got into my 20s. Very good explanation.
Thank you for sharing.
Are you ok now?
My nephew was diagnosed with it today, any advice you can share?
Recent longitudinal studies suggest remission rates greater than 90% at the 10 year mark. It will get better.
As a person diagnosed with bpd.. I agree one hundred percent with the speaker...Dr.. that the name or label needs change.. complex trauma disorder sounds easier on the ear if I'm explaining my psychosis to someone..without instant judgment..
I see it in their body language, and other ways..
Do it now!!!
That car analogy is the best I’ve heard as someone with BPD
By far the most helpful and encompassing video on BPD that I've seen on youtube. So helpful, thank you doctor.
Thank you for your feedback 🙏🏻
I have a Masters degree in SW, and ironically, I never learned anything as helpful as this video in School or out of school. This video is really great. The video is a great summation.
Its a good video Dr Daniel Fox is a good resource
Dr Daniel Fox is extremely helpful.
I like the way he explains BPD. And I like his voice, someone's speaking voice can affect a person's mood, you know? His is very calming and clear. Thanks Dr. Rege.
Thanks for your feedback. 🙏🏻
Agree, his voice is very nice to hear. Very professional
My girlfriend and mother of my child was diagnosed as bipolar 1, which I believe to be accurate, but I also think she suffers from BPD. I’ve heard that it’s not uncommon to suffer from both. Impulsive and attention seeking behaviors, black/white thinking, identity changes, fear of abandonment, history of trauma (but as an adult), suicidal behavior and narcissistic traits, but there are times she seems so genuine and self aware.
I have BPD and am a psychology graduate, and since then I have done a *lot* of introspection and research (as well as being in therapy the whole time) so would say I'm very self-aware - but that doesn't always stop me from exhibiting the problematic behaviours and experiencing overwhelming affects and maladaptive thinking patterns, at least not all the time. One of the problems in BPD is a feeling of total dyscontrol as soon as emotions (invariably intense) appear. When I was doing DBT, in the group we would *always* be saying things like "I know I'm reading into it too much, but I can't shake the feeling that..." and the problem here is that that's in a slowed down and controlled therapeutic setting. In real life situations things move faster, emotions spiral out of control and there's not a therapist there to help you out, so you end up acting on the feeling despite still knowing on some level that you are splitting or being irrational, melodramatic, or narcissistic. Obviously that's something that is worked on in DBT but it takes time and practice.
I don't think there are any words to describe how much this video has helped me.
Thank you for your feedback 🙏🏻 and glad you found it useful .
I'm a guy who's family doesn't really "believe" in mental illness despite my mother having borderline and talk about Mental health is often dismissed but recently my friend had introduced me to his sister who had borderline and we started talking about her and what life is like for her and I related a lot which is rare for me because I often find myself tryna explain things but nobody really gets what I mean and so I told her about myself as well and she verbalized my feelings in ways that I never could and that was a first for me in my 17 years of life and so I decided to look into borderline and I'm not saying I have it but man all these videos are like a breath of fresh air in understanding myself and things actually make sense for once
This feedback is much appreciated. Thank you so much for sharing and expressing. 🙏🏼
It’s a personal difficulty with coping during difficult or expected situations. They struggle to be consistent and when a change or potential change appears it’s difficult to know what will really happen next
I am 52, and my BPD is very treatment resistant .. it must be. I’ve had a lot of the treatments listed consistently, ongoing, never with an interruption since I was 27. The only thing that even comes close to helping is avoidance of all close relationships.
For some, it just lies dormant. I didn’t even know what I actually had going on for a long time, but I thought the volatile part was gone. Got in a relationship after 8 years of peace, and there it was. I was in complete shock.
as someone with bpd, I long to not feel how I feel...all of the time. Its horrible. Like sometimes Im afraid of myself. Makes me feel like a monster. It sucks and I wouldnt wish this on anyone. I wanna learn as much as possible so I can work on improving my behavior..like my anger and my difficulty understanding those grey areas of life. And to stop the flashbacks that makes me a monster (i have ptsd as well)
You need a consistent therapy around 10-15 years to heal... Everyday work, journaling and DBT therapy.
Be gentle on yourself, you are healing. Keep up with therapy and before you know it, you will see how much you have been healing.
I thought I was the only one who called themself monster. I sometimes look forward to disassociating just to not think about how awful I really am. People tell me I’m a very kindhearted and sweet person all the time. I’m glad they can’t read my mind. I don’t fear death. I won’t kill myself but I won’t fight to stay either. Make any sense?
Thank you for this very educational video! Thank you for bringing hope to people diagnosed with this disorder.
Glad you found this useful
I was a psych nurse for 15 years before I became disabled. And because of all of the constant nastiness, I heard from nurses and doctors, I did not get help for my bipolar. I think I’m borderline as well, but I don’t know if I want that diagnosis. The stigma is absolutely horrible. And when you get hospitalized everyone automatically assumes you are a horrible
😔 man, its wild how caustic some of the people we are basically required to invest a lot of trust in can be. Hopefully videos like this one can help to move the needle away from stigmatizing conditions like bpd and bipolar; I think we've already seen massive improvements, on the bipolar end at least. You should check out Offir Sasson's bpd animation here on RUclips, I don't remember the title but its a really cool, empathetic look at the experience of having bpd that I personally found very moving. Love ya, stranger.
Lamotrigine actually does help a lot. The first few weeks it made me feel a bit sick, and even manic at times. After that as I went through 50mg, 75mg, 100mg twice daily over the months I had no SH incidents of life attempts. It won't cure you in anyway, but it makes my life easier.
i’ve recently been putting in a lot of effort into treating my possible CTD, so this video really means a lot to me. i appreciate the depths you went into to explain things, it makes everything seem more tolerable and less scary. thank you.
Thank you for your feedback. Means a lot!
My RUclips channel name can help you out with shrooms ,lsd ,Dmt and other psychedelic stuff that helps for anxiety,depression, bod and adhd
Iv done so much “self help” over the years! I always knew I wasn’t “right” i had a really abusive childhood and various other major trauma throughout my life and just thought i was bitter and angry (which i am also) getting diagnosed with BPD (CTD) last year FINALLY made sense why i am the way i am… i am at the very start of my CTD journey having a proper accurate diagnosis makes all the difference because at least we can work on it from a point of information and not theory and psychobabble. Good luck
Thank you for providing a fairly comprehensive and neutral definition of BPD. Almost impossible to find online. When asked by for eg a friend "what is BPD?" - it's not like this particular condition can be summed up in one sentence, right! I'm 3+yrs in remission and it's great to be able to share a link to this rather than try to explain. BPD's not only extremely complicated and misunderstood, but since recovering it's not a topic I particularly want to dwell very long on in a conversation. Thank you again.
Thank you for your feedback. 🙏🏻
This was right on point with my mind omg. Thank you
You are so welcome,
Hi Dr Rege, yesterday I received a BPD diagnosis from my psychiatrist (as well as C-PTSD + my previous OCD & PMDD).
I’ve been suffering for a very long time and one bothersome thing to note is a psychiatrist I had put “possible BPD” in my chart 3 years ago but I was never told that he did that until yesterday.
I admit that I may not have taken that info well at the time but it’s been a lot more empowering to know in the long run. I wish someone would have just told me years ago.
My social worker was the one who separately brought the possibility up to me 6 months ago and since then so much has clicked as I’ve been able to learn about myself and dive into the wealth of info available online + it’s been nice to just know there’s other people who are like me.
I even watched this exact vid beforehand but had no idea BPD could apply to me.
My psych has offered me Lamictal or Abilify to think about and decide what I’d like to take. Do you have links for info about comparisons, efficacy etc. I’m already on fluoxetine, LDN and valium which especially helps the agitation/anxiety. Just looking for help knowing what I should proceed with as there’s not much time to chat at psych appts.
I’ve also heard Dr. Lois Choi Kain, a prominent BPD advocate speak about a recent study on Lamictal for BPD which says it had no greater effect than placebo… not sure if you’ve heard this?
Thank you for sharing. Re aripiprazole vs Lamotrigine - the choice is made based on what one is trying to achieve.
Medications can’t necessarily change the construct of BPD which is why studies show no medication works - however this doesn’t mean that medication doesn’t help other comorbid symptoms that worsen the BPD construct e.g impulsivity. Lamotrigine is used in clinical practice and has beneficial effects on mood stability, racing thoughts, emotional dyscontrol and some evidence in reduction of self harm - however medication alone is not sufficient - the medication helps the individual to apply the psychological strategies. Re ari this has dual mechanisms at different doses and one should know what are the targets one is aiming for. Ps not advice
@@PsychiatrySimplified Thanks for your reply, yes precisely - I’m struggling with progressing in psychotherapy because of my dysregulatiom/anger/anxiety/obsessiveness that keeps getting triggered and derailing our work, hence why my provider wanted me to get my meds reviewed. Am currently awaiting a referral to a DBT group as well.
I’m thinking based off of the little research I’ve done, I might try Lamictal first since it has fewer side effects and if I remember correctly - it has some kind of similarity to the mechanism of valium?… which already helps those symptoms immensely. Just difficult having my psych leave this decision to me without giving me more detailed info. 🙃🙈
@@PsychiatrySimplifiedwhat a thoughtful response! Rare on YT
My current psychiatrist thinks i might have BPD. I also have PCOS and hashimotos. This is the first I've heard of them being connected. Very interesting...
Thanks for sharing!! Wish you well. Yes the common link is the HPA axis dysfunction
Don’t think bad about others, pray about it, let it go live freely. Learn to pray and don’t carry burdens, be kind to one another.
I loved psychotherapy. I felt more free to work on being a better person even though I have bpd. Pot is my medicine.
Thanks for sharing.
Psychedelics and meditation have greatly help me out. I am still very impulsive especially when it comes to money, but i used to have major mood swings to the point where I sabotage relationships
I'm only at the phase of coming up with a plan to get my wife to consider treatment. I wasn't totally aware of what BPD was until a therapist during one session asked me about our relationship which lead to discussing her behavior, which then lead to discussing her childhood. Immediately I was told this is "practically textbook" and was given a lot of of informal material and referred to a BPD Famliy support group. As someone with bipolar disorder I initially sought therapy was the way I was being treated was triggering ideation. Presently I'm getting help (and medcation) but I'm determined to find her help as well.
Do u love your wife?
I’m asking this cause my ex bf left me because of my bpd related symptoms- which at that time neither of us were aware of the fact that I have bpd- so now I’m wondering if anyone ever is able to love me?
@@maryamhedayat7032 There are seriously times that I have to question it. Its better for me at times to feel that I dont love her, but will eventually- and sure enough I do. Sometimes people have been together for a long time can fan fall in and out of love repeatedly. Understanding that love isn't some magical spell give us more power. Contrary to what we've been told since childhood, being in love is both conditional and fleeting. Love does not live outside time, it's something you have to keep tending to. Taking care of my own mental health ensures that I will likely never completely stop loving her. Additionally, if it get to the point where she won't accept help and I have to break ties, I would at least do everything I could to make sure we ended on as good terms as possible if for no other reason but out of love and respect of the woman she once was.
Menopause has really intensified the BPD!
Yes it can due to the fronto limbic dysfunction being exacerbated. Here is an article covering BpD but also Neuroendocrine and neurobiological aspects psychscenehub.com/psychinsights/borderline-personality-disorder/
Yes it can due to the fronto limbic dysfunction being exacerbated. Here is an article covering BpD but also Neuroendocrine and neurobiological aspects psychscenehub.com/psychinsights/borderline-personality-disorder/
@@PsychiatrySimplified Thank you!
I love these 'treatment' options, as if they're as easy as just rocking up for hospitalisation, or going to therapy every now and then.
Even if it's not easy you would like to stay without treatment? No one with mental illness should stay without treatment, someone if stays without treatment might take their own life it's a serious thing
They told me I have EUPD, I didn't realise at first this was the same thing..
It's been there my whole adult life.. Ive had a cpn for about a year now.. and I still struggle dealing with my emotions! I have not been able to get over a relationship I had 3 years ago.. it doesn't help I have a child with that person.. so they are still present alot in my life.
My emotions are so intense and I struggle to rationalise things in my life..
I have hallucinations when things get really intense..
Queitapine and lamictal have helped my mood swings.. I can't take ssri as they make my slightly manic..
I hope new medications come to the market as I am on the last ones! I've tried over ten during my life..
I feel so disconected and feel like I am watching a movie and have no control over my actions.. I've actually just went for a walk and ended up jumping on a train and traveling across the country and trying to live on the streets for no reason! This led to a hospital stay for a month!
I've watch this to get a reminder of my diagnosis..
It's helped me see my issues again.. so difficult to treat in my case.. I do DBT..
I hope everybody is coping with their own diagnosis!
Thank you for sharing your personal experience. Wish you well in our journey. It's good you have treatment for it.
I have so much compassion and empathy for anyone going through this and other mental illnesses, I struggle with other illnesses myself. All the best, you will find help keep pushing keep pushing keep pushing.
This is an excellent video. Thank you for all your information on BPD
Thank you for your feedback
Fantastic explanation and information relevant to practice. Thank you Dr.
Thank you for your feedback 🙏🏼
I was diagnosed at age 16 & never knew if it was correct. I fit most of these except I have way too MUCH empathy (it literally hurts sometimes), and I've never had anger issues or been inappropriately hostile--in fact, I've always been excessively passive. And I'm not super extreme in how I communicate/interact with people, just extreme in how I feel & experience things.
Some mental health professionals say I definitely have BPD, others say no way. Idk what to think.
Sometimes labels don’t help - aim is to identify if the patterns of behaviour are causing personal and interpersonal distress . One can address them via psychotherapy irrespective .
i think you can try watching dr.k's video on bpd from 10 months ago, maybe youll hear something that will help
If you have real empathy witch means beaing able to relate to how others feel and stopping yourself self before gaslighting to the point that any normal person would be suicidal from all the out right lies that you just said. Then you don't have bpd. When the borderline line rage kicks in they are ruthless. Hit me up if you have any questions.
@@jasonscott7527 Wow. What a bizarre response.
1) I've never gaslit anyone, ever. Gaslighting is horrible and it's abuse.
2) What specifically was it I said that you think are lies, and why? More importantly, who are you to tell ME what is or was not my experience? Seems pretty arrogant to me, unless I'm misunderstanding something.
It might be derogatory, but don’t minimise it, it’s even more distressful to it’s victims.
It can have a significant impact on others. Agree
I think my wife has BPD. Her behavior became much more erratic during pregnancy and recently she has become violent toward me (3 years later). She is seeing a psychiatrist. I am not sure what she discusses with him; he has put her on anti-depressants. It is becoming very difficult for me. I feel the best way to live with her is to avoid each other.
It is a treatable condition. Wish you and your wife well
I have PCOS and a strong suspicion I have BPD. The stigma attached to it is what I’m most afraid of. It makes me feel like a bad person. the worst symptom I have and identify with most is the idealization of someone and then the devaluation. It happens so quickly, and even though I know I’m jumping to conclusions I can’t turn it off. Usually I cope by just writing out a rant and deleting it later. I try to keep it to myself because I know it’s not normal.
There is a strong association between PCOS, thyroid autoimmunity and BPD. This is usually linked to trauma and HPA axis dysfunction. This feeds into aspects such as PMDD, emotional dysregulation and personality dysfunction if pervasive and enduring. Covered in more detail here - psychscenehub.com/psychinsights/polycystic-ovarian-syndrome-psychiatry-psychiatrist-know/
I'm in the same boat...I'm worried to get a proper diagnosis but I think it would explain a lot to confirm it...
@@Serrenoa I’m wanting someone to talk to about this sort of thing, I feel so alone when I’m experiencing symptoms but I don’t feel like I have a right to go to the forums meant for people with BPD since I don’t have an official diagnosis. so please feel free message me if you want to talk. And I’m willing to listen too of course. Maybe we can be friends. I’ll put some info as to how you can reach me in my bio.
@@PsychiatrySimplified thank you for the information, I loved your video. Keep up the good work.
i’m on the same boat…
This is very informative. I love listening to you.
I am in a relationship and live with a man with BPD. He was diagnosed as a child alone with Agoraphobia . He is not in treatment or on meds and I go through hell. He becomes very suspicious and does not trusts me or anyone . When he rages it’s a horrible sight . He never lets me go anywhere alone because he fears abandonment and thinks I will cheat . I believe he has paranoid personality disorder with it . He has no friends and doesn’t keep in touch with family . He was molested as a child and was in and out of foster care because his mother was on drugs until she died . I’ve worked as a therapist for years and never thought I would end up with a person like the people I treat . I’m on the brink of leaving him. When he “splits” and disassociates it’s the worst !!!
It is the worst and I feel for you. I have borderline myself. I cannot tell you how awful I feel when I dissociate and push people away. Mine is not as bad as his sounds. I can keep it under control. I was also a victim of SA and other abuses. Basically it is that the person you trusted the most in the world did not protect you and you develop these coping mechanism.
I would say to you, if he does not get treatment ASAP, run as far you can. Because he will never change and you deserve to have peace.
@@hollystiener16 wow thank you for reply to me. Yea his May be worse than yours . I broke up with him yesterday but we still love together . I felt sorry for him today because he texted that he was feeling down and was hungry . I have him sleeping at a friends house since Friday . I do miss him being in the bed at night . My final straw was when I just had relatives visiting from out of town for 3 days . My female cousins . He was really sad that I had to spend a lot of time with them . Only 2 of the days he really he was not wit us . He had a meltdown and kept texting me that he misses me . Then when they left he turned into the devil and yelled at me when I set my alarm saying that I was texting other men and I’m a cheater . I told him that I was simply setting my alarm in my phone . It turned me off and he slept on the couch . He was very loud and in my face . I got scared . I know it was his coping mechanism and all he really wanted to say was “hey baby you’re my favorite person and when you were gone with your family I felt alone and I missed you and now that they’re gone please hold me close” . But instead he lashed out and now I’m leaving him and it’s very sad .
@@soyicasweet99 You are very brave to distance yourself. I feel for you. Because I know how he is hurting you. We do this push-pull thing. There is a book called, I Love You, I Hate You, Don't Leave Me. The title pretty much sums it up. Anyone gets too close and we must push. Anyone gets too far and we must pull. To us, closeness and leaving feel like a matter of life and death. It is that traumatising. Intimacy and trust is a risk that is too high for us. As children we could not count on our parents and we needed too. He feels unloved, unworthy, and unvalued. And no amount of love, patience, and acceptance that you can give, or anyone for that matter, will help him. I have had the best boyfriends on the planet and they could not help me.
I am finally going to get some serious help for mine now. I am terrified of doing and wonder if it will even work. I am so embarrassed that I have it, even though it is not my fault. I spent a few days with someone that I like and I acted terribly.
I am very happy that you are taking care of yourself because he will not change without treatment and even then it could take years. I am sorry that it is so hard.
@@hollystiener16 wow . Thanks for your kind words ! Everything that you said sums up his behavior completely . His mother was on drugs his whole life and he was in and out of foster care . He was molested as well. So I can see how that trauma affected him and they way he thinks . He has seen a lot as a child . When he needed his mother most she was not there . I can imagine the pain he felt as a child. He is not close with his father and when he did live with him as a child , the girlfriend abused him and he was taken away . He doesn’t have friends due to the push and pull thing he does . Yes I heard of that book you’re talking about too. I am so proud of you for getting treatment . I wish he would do that . The furthest I got was having him watch a few videos . It gets painful for him after awhile when they talk about trauma and he switches to something else . I know I have to leave him but as a mental health professional myself , it makes me feel bad that I couldn’t have at least got him in treatment . I think I will do videos on my channel on what it’s like dating someone with BPD. I was private about it but I think I may be able to help others .
@@soyicasweet99 He has certainly had it rough and rougher than I had it, which I can't even imagine that. It took me years to watch videos because it is like retraumatizing and then you feel so much shame.
You are so sweet that you feel bad, but it is okay and you can feel bad from a distance. Send him lots of love and pray for him.
Funny, I am thinking of doing youtube videos on my journey with recovering from this. Been thinking for a few days. Or maybe a podcast. You absolutely should do videos and you can help people to understand, but also to know to walk away.
This is very concerning,of all the points I meet 7,it's never good to self diagnose but I might look into it just in case
I had a partner suffering from this disorder. There was no way to convince her to be aware of it, let alone to go to the therapy. I felt sad and weak because i cdnt help. After we split up she ended up in a horrific relationship with a person who suffers from a dissociative disorder. And persisted in it. She used to have turbulent and toxic relationships in the past as well but it seems that i was sort of exception BUT she didnt stop trying to make our relationship seem to her previous relationships and it frustrated me a lot. A didnt want to live in that type of hell: a mixture of intense emotions, love-hate status, fights, paranoia etc.
Sorry to hear. It’s very challenging
Thank you sir!
Love the delivery , learned allot!
Thank you for your feedback 🙏🏼
I love this man. He is the only person who gives a real and sympathetic view of BPD. Love the way he admits we get bad press and unfairly yreated. Professionals act like we are a pain an inconvenience and a waste of a hospital bed. They would prefer to help any other mentally patient but us. We are just a nhs number to them. In my opinion our suicide would simply be a casual statistic nothing else.. i was told that i should get used to constant suicide attempts and that would be my main mptom for the rest of my life but would not merit hospitalisation because I keep surviving and basically i would have to die to be took seriously...so i said ther🎉e would only be one problem... I would not get the help then either..unless i come back to haunt them lol. Love to all you BPD survivors xxc
Thank you for sharing your sad experience. All the best to you take care ❤️
I had undiagnosed BPD for decades because I was just a pretty face on the outside who couldn’t possibly have problems and yet was outcast. The world is hypocrites literally you’re ridiculed by therapists for not having emotions or naming feelings and then completely shunned for then having said emotions. There’s no way through this. Like anything is suddenly going to help now. They don’t know that it’s not who the person is it could be anyone…anyone is an enemy.
I am being assessed next month as i strongly suspect i have BPD too. I realised the other day, like a light switch turned ON in my head. It was both a relief but scary. Scary at the thought its been ME causing everyone so much pain yet for years ive thought i was the victim and my outbursts were justified. They were not. I am with a beautiful man now who understands i show all 9 traits and is standing by me. This is both such a safe feeling, but so much pressure as im scared im going to switch by being triggered, so im watching what i say, do, its exhausting. Did you get your diagnosis? and if so, how did you feel before and after please anyone? xx
Concerned i might have the quiet type of this. I do have a sibling diagnosed with it too.
You could consider an assessment - even online questionnaires - however if significant then a psychological or psychiatric assessment can provide more detail.
Sir, make a video on stammering/stuttering associated with brain functioning
Thank you for that suggestion. We have added it to the list. There are fascinating nee developments re stuttering in neurobiology and treatment. We will aim to do this
One thing I dislike here is the constant association of BPD with females, even in this video, you see illustrations of females. I am a male with BPD due to a stressful and unstable childhood of emotional and verbal abuse, physical violence in the home, inconsistent treatment from caregivers, and inappropriate behavior by caregivers exhibited around me and when interacting with me. Males get BPD too, and are often misdiagnosed, or not properly diagnosed at all. Males with BPD also have a higher rate and risk of suicide. Having BPD constantly associated with females, both in discussion and things like the illustrations in this presentation, does not help.
Yes you are correct ! Point taken. There does tend to be a gender bias ( neurobiologically) and societally but you are correct that the gender bias should be minimised
I’m confused. I feel an abundance of empathy. Possibly even to much. I’ve spent many hours contemplating rather or not it’s actually projection.
Also have spent many therapy hours on recognizing the difference.
I do identify with everything else mentioned.
I’m told I’m a “perfect borderline”. I understand that means I have every symptom listed in the diagnose criteria.
One does not need lack of empathy for the criteria to be met. Lack of empathy is usually seen in Narcissistic personality disorder or anti social PD
Thank you for this. Very informative
Thank you for the feedback 🙏🏻
Thank you for making this video and explaining it in a very helpful way 👍✨
Glad it was helpful!
I’m shocked. I have Hoshimotos disease (a thyroid disorder) I also have had to have an opherectomy (my ovaries removed) due to PCOS. I also have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. I am 46 years old. I was diagnosed with BPD 17 years ago. Yet, this is the first time I’ve ever been told that there’s a correlation between all three of my conditions.
Excellent explanation. Really helpful
Thanks for your feedback.
My RUclips channel name can help you out with shrooms ,lsd ,Dmt and other psychedelic stuff that helps for anxiety,depression, bod and adhd
trying to educate myself on these things, i’m waiting for my momma to hurry and get me therapist so i could possibly get an diagnosis. i’m only 15 and constantly trying to figure out if i’m struggling with mental health on my own is so tiring.
Just hang in there a little while longer ♥️♥️!! I’m hanging in there as well.
I wish we can all hang on till we can get help. 🙏
It’s going to be hard to get a diagnosis at 15 I’m not going to lie. I just got diagnosed at 24 and even then they consider it “too young”. I started seeking help at 19 and it took me 5 years to get my clinical diagnosis. 😭
At that age there's lots of change in hormone so there would be many oveflapped symptons of different issues. Regards of the diagnosis, you could still find some good method to cope with the symptons, being mindful is very important. Wish you all the best.
Hi there are therapy videos on RUclips CBT and DBT and mindfulness stress management videos might help you.
Normal adolescent development includes temporary elevated emotionality and reactivity, because the limbic system has a growth spurt before the frontal
Cortex (logic and reasoning and planning etc).
If you have health insurance maybe you can call and schedule your own treatment on your own?
If not, the library or book store likely have helpful workbooks on BPD or just try a CBT workbook to help.
Lots of good little books on trauma too if needed.
Getting on top of it now is a good sign you can grow and develop into who you want to be.
Also please consider nutrition and the gut-brain axis. Wheat inflames the brain in everyone and will worsen everyone, some worse than others.
Dairy and sugar and other refined carbs can be a problem.
Also a vegan diet (I was a raw food vegan for a decade) is a horrible idea for having a strong body and healthy brain. There really are proteins and fats you need missing from plant foods… and plants dont want to die and scream on a polygraph when threatened… most of them are full of toxins like oxalates and lectins and cause progressively more problems in Humans.
Best wishes!
I always wondered if my sister is BPD . Maybe a narcissist
But she seems to be emphatic and she loves her family. But her house is so clean she's obsessed about weight used to drink take speed. Has tried to commit suicide. The thing that made me think of this
Is she cheated on her husband but when caught. Said he cheated all the time not true
Unfortunately this is my girlfriend of three years absolutely getting on my last nerve and I don't think i'm going to be able to put up with any longer
Sorry to hear. If it is BPD - then treatments are available and effective.
I like the explanation. I hope I can get some treatment for it.
Thanks for the feedback. There is treatment for this condition and it is treatable and the prognosis is good. Marsha linehan who developed DBT herself had BPD and she has recently written a book.
@@PsychiatrySimplified thank you! I will read up on it!
Lamictal was a wash for me.
Lithium helps.
It IS used for treatment resistant depression.
BUT... I'm almost certainly not bipolar...
Major depression, PTSD from childhood, a dash of dissociative symptoms related to stressful moments, a lot of fear of romantic relationships (honestly, I and my ex tried really hard to make our marriage work... It was SO painful at the end.💔 And now I'm afraid. Pretty straightforward, not even a reaction exclusive to the bearers of brain cooties. )
I don't have all the criterion for BPD.
I used to have pretty much all the criteria.
Diagnosis is in contemplation.
Thank you for sharing.
@@PsychiatrySimplified
Yw. I wonder if oversharing is a borderline trait....😳 Oh, I subscribed. Useful channel.
@@grmpEqweer thank you 🙏🏼
Bipolar and bod often go together. Why would u take lithium if not bipolar? I have both BP and BPD and the lithium prevents psychosis.
Tbh the symptoms of each are very similar, especially mania and bpd, although one is a mood disorder and one a personality disorder.
Hi. My parter was diagnosed whit BPD. I would be very thankfull if someone whould advise me, how to react to his mood swings 😊 Thank a lot ❤
For BPD in general with mood swings evidence based treatments include DBT which has a component of emotional regulation. It is also important to rule out mild bipolarity which if present responds well to a mood stabiliser. Ps not medical advice
Dont tell him to “calm down” lol that is the thing that is most likely to trigger me more!
I guess just reassure him it will pass if he takes a minute and gets his breathing under control, i would suggest leaving him alone and not trying to solve the issue in that moment as i know i need time to calm and reflect before i can discuss what happened and able to move forward.
Good luck
@@Tsunami1.618 thanks for sharing this. And good suggestion
I did it so, but didn't helped much. He just trow the food i cooked for us, away and spit in my coffee. I am so sorry but i can't take it any longer 😔
@@sashas3979 well you shouldn’t have to, just because someone has a diagnosis does not give them permission to abuse the people closest to them, its one thing to be angry but another thing altogether when it turns into domestic abuse. You can’t save everyone and in this instance i would say, you need to leave for your own sanity, nobody wants to go down with a sinking ship, if he doesn’t talk to you about WHY he does what he does then he isnt even seeking treatment or help and taking it out on you is just an easy way to vent his frustration, you are not his punch bag. It IS possible to control your moods (at least for me) towards the people i love (my son) is the only person i dont rage at so it is possible to keep it under control. To be more specific he may be pushing you away to “prove himself right” that EVERYONE leaves (dont forget one of BPD symptoms is extreme fear of abandonment) but the irony is we push these people in our lives to PROVE its true, even though its our outrageous behaviour which makes it happen! Please look after yourself. Sending best wishes x
I am trying to sort this out.
I see all these traits in my spouse.
Behaviors also
To me it seems certain.
Emotional dysregulation for sure
You never really know who they will be when you walk in the door.
Immense anger that can hang on for days and a self righteous certainty about things. Very conspiratorial
An assessment may help as it can guide appropriate treatment .
I had a horrible psychiatrist. I'm not familiar with the stigma but this does explain so much of what I've been through after the diagnosis. I didn't think it fit me well enough, so I guess the diagnosis was the last fuck you from her.
i present many bpd symptoms and have family with bpd too. i really think i might have bpd, but the fact that i am 16 years old and live in a country with poor mental health care makes it difficult to know where to look to try and get a diagnosis. :(
Sorry to hear. Difficult to provide guidance if mental health care if not present. Hopefully you can find some professionals that can help address this.
Has anyone else with BPD lost so many people they no longer believe in God?
Omg that is too specific
I have BPD and it has ruined my life.
Sorry to hear. It is a treatable condition
@@PsychiatrySimplified I have been in dbt and psychoanalysis for almost two years straight and I still feel controlled by it. Thank you.
@@AnneLien1987 that is good to know. Wish you well.
Same xxxx
Same
You know she said some things in the past about this but I've never looked into it, but now that I look into it this is one hundred percent her, she's non-medicated she's not stable and she has six children to take care of. It's everyday with you don't love me when we fight she gets very intense she's thrown her phone at my face before she is very very very intense like she wants me to put my hands on her or something like that because she's had that trouble in the past, One minute she's happy one minute she's telling me she, " fucking hates me. " I also understand how everybody has their own things going on but like I said i've been dealing with this for three years and it hasn't gotten any better. She's always ridiculing everybody she calls everybody retards. I'm just venting so I do apologize but any reaction or engagement is good engagement. Very informative stuff dr. Happy holidays. 😊
Sure understand. it's a difficult situation. Generally its good to get an assessment - as hormonal issues like thyroid autoimmunity and PCOS can coexist and exacerbate mood states. If one recognises it and can get psychotherapy to address emotional dysregulation, then it can be effective.
I have a diagnosis tomorrow and they think I have eupd, I’m nervous but I just wanna understand why I am the way I am
Good luck! Wish you well.
Are there any studies showing if Ability is helpful in BPD? With comorbidities of depression and anxiety, already on an SSRI this would often be something I might think of using, but there is no mention of it in BPD here. Great video. Thank you.
It really depends on what one is trying to target. So aripiprazole when prescribed the question is what part of BPD is one trying to target. It's difficult to answer that as aripiprazole is also dose-dependent in its action. Lower dose activation, higher dose reduction of agitation or mood stabilisation and antipsychotic effects
Thank you Doctor, this has been eye-opening, even if a little uncomfortable for me. I'm shortly going for an ADHD assessment, which is why I've been trying to learn more about it, and it has led me here. I don't think I have ADHD, PTSD I'm pretty sure of, but now after watching this and other videos on BPD, I wonder if this has been the issue all along. I'm a 46 year old woman, diagnosed bulimic, and diagnosed with mixed anxiety and depressive disorder. I have zero self worth, I shut myself off from family and friends, and I've only had 1 serious relationship because I know that eventually, they're going to treat me badly and end the relationship. My family exclude me from things, I recently found out they have a WhatsApp group I'm not a part of. I don't believe my thoughts to be paranoia when people actively treat me differently/negatively, and I keep leaving jobs because I don't fit in. I know it's not my job to give the psychiatrist pointers, but I wonder if all of this would be better explained as BPD instead of ADHD. Any suggestions very gratefully received.
There is an overlap between BPD and ADHD because of the emotional arousal phenotype that occurs in ADHD in females. So one should consider this as a formulation rather than ask if it’s one or the other. The symptoms of adhd and bpd arise from dysfunction of prefrontal cortex and the amygdala arousal. You can learn more in this video where I go into more detail Psychiatrist Analyzes Psychologist Testimonies in the Amber Heard vs J.Depp trial | Trauma Disorders
ruclips.net/video/XG5DKbR-H5k/видео.html
@@PsychiatrySimplified Thanks so much for your reply, I'll certainly watch the clip you have recommended.
I have bipolar 1 disorder and bpd from, I believe, cptsd.
Very informative! I think that my cousin suffers from BDP and I think that short term
hospitalization might be the best possible solution at the moment, because she is dealing with very unstable relationship which causes high level of stress and very unstable
behaviour.
I would like to approach her with the suggestion that she would be better off at the hospital at the moment, where she can get a starting point for understanding her own condition and how it can be treated.
The problem is that she is not aware that she is dealing with a condition rather than with a bad relationship.
Do you maybe have some advice on how to get closer to her so that I can communicate this idea? I would not mention BDP at all, maybe that is not the issue after all, but hospitalization is the only way for her to start taking care of her mental health, hopefully.
The other big problem is the enviorment in which the issues with mental health are really stigmatized and as the condition progresses, she is draging more and more people into that ambyss because she is not able to regulate anything by herself, and it is a complete chaos at the moment with a lot of people sharing opinions without being aware at all that it is the last thing she really needs now. No relevant support at all!
Any sort of advice would be much appreciated. I will make an appointment with her psychiatrist too, to share these thoughts as it seems that her doctor is not informed about a lot of things that happen in between sessions (once in two months).
Thanks for you comment. It is a difficult one to answer. In general one can raise these issues openly and honestly framing it as a part of care and concern for the individual. However this doesn't not always work. Being part of treatment by providing information to psychiatrist can help as that can then be addressed by the psychiatrist. Ps not medical advice.
@@PsychiatrySimplified Thanks for your response doctor! I will share my idea for hospitalization with her paychiatrist then and update them on her condition in the past few days. I think that she is not sharing all the mood swings and intensity of it with her doctor whatsoever, which could be relevant. All the best 🙌🏻
Your cousin is lucky to have you !
A hospital will not recognize BPD.
@@admirlatifovic6662 I really hope you were able to help your cousin. Please let me know.
I was diagnosed bipolar for 8 years now they changed it to ubpd it bothers me the change as it should b the same.but your explanation does ring true .I am very hostile and aggressive to protect myself but actually care to much I've been waiting 8 half years now for dbt on the isle of wight .
8 and half years ? 😟. That's a long wait. Hope you can get the treatment. Wish you well.
Thankyou
@@PsychiatrySimplified thankyou
Which guildlines you used for explanation???
Since the video is a few years old , here is the latest 👉psychscenehub.com/psychinsights/bpd-diagnosis-management-strategies/
I’m 50 yo. I’ve always “felt” like I was “off” compared to most. Anyway after all this time and thanks to the Internet information is more prolific than it used to be. My point is I’m 99.99% sure that I have BPD. Ok great! HOWEVER, I live in Southern New Jersey. The closest DBT therapist is in New York, a 3 Hour drive!. Is there any hope for me with a regular psychotherapist or do you think that would be a complete waste of time??..
I’ve been in and out of therapy since I was six years old. (mostly out!)…
There are online DBT programs that are available. Perhaps they may suit. Wish you well.
Today I was assessed, I thought I just had CPTSD, now processing the possibilities of BPD as well as Covid PTSD. Taken years but today was accepted for 18mths of MBT, to include, group, 121 and trauma on the NHS.
Have you found anyone yet Mike?
@@curlysue3620 no not yet. I see a regular psychotherapist once a week, but that’s about it for now. Idk if it helps. Nice to talk to someone though!…
@@causeisays0y Good to hear. Talking is good. Take care.
Can the abandonment work the other way. Like can the person with bpd abandon or be afraid of the connection and leave ?
Yes absolutely. To prevent harm to self emotionally the relationships may be superficial and may end in a shorter period for fear of being hurt or abandoned.
Thanks I'm currently being tested for bpd or bi polar. What I have explained in my comment is how I am. I run away or sabotage the relationship. I think it's so I can feel some form of control over situations in my life.
very well done
Doctor such a pro Video , I am a care giver , have a family member Diagnosed with BPD twenty years ago now stabilized with valproic and some other medications by a Psychiatric doc
After Many years of researching on the Internet I discovered as you mention hormones dysfunctions can be a cause would you please elaborate in Detail about hormones in mental Health
Why hasn‘t medicine Till yet invested more Research about it ? I am 53 on HRT Most Mood Symptoms in premenopause and Menopause can be cured with neurosteroids , Is this a futuristic approach to mental Health ? Thanks for sharing your knowledge blessings
Yes, neurosteroids are in focus. We have written more on neurosteroids, menopausal depression etc here psychscenehub.com
I feel relief from BPD when I read the karma sutra.
😌 hell yeah, I feel relief from bpd when I read House of Leaves
My wife is diagnosed with BPD she is violent towards me. She has mood swings alot. I took her to psychiatrist and he prescribed her 2 medicines Sertraline and Risperidone and escalated us to have sessions with a psycologist! My question is that is it curable ?
It is treatable and treatment improves interpersonal functioning . BPD requires psychotherapy and specific kinds of treatments include DBT , schema therapy, mentalisation based therapy and transference focused therapy. Evidence suggests that the components of BPD improve over time and the condition can go into remission.
I’ve been scared that I might have BPD but I have no idea where to go or how to get a diagnosis or help.
Usually - best starting point is to have an assessment with a general practitioner and discuss the issues. As medical aspects also need to be ruled out. Then an assessment by a psychiatrist/psychologist can provide further input. There are treatments for this condition. Wish you well.
I am a firm believer that alcohol, drugs and/or a bad diet contribute to many personality issues and problems
I dont do any of those things and I have BPD. My family life at home was horrible. It sucks.
Smoke 🚬 medical Marijuana, it works well for me give it a try.
Or it could be the exact opposite. The way you view yourself with BPD can lead to self harm or self medicating with things like drugs, alcohol, or food. I didn’t have any issues with those things when I first started showing real signs of BPD but developed problems as a way to self medicate because I didn’t understand what was actually going on with me.
I was sober for a year and still felt empty. Doing speed gave me meaning cuz it made me want to be productive and create my art again
Great vid
Hi there,
Thank you for this explanation it’s very helpful
I once around 10 years ago had a therapist make generalised suggestions that I could have BPD. She would use terms with me such as ‘splitting’ and ‘identity disturbance’. When I asked her outright if I had a personality disorder, she didn’t answer me directly.
I have in the last year seen a therapist, but for a physical rehabilitation program for chronic fatigue. In the program, your given very brief, short, therapeutic support. Again, I asked if I had BPD and the therapist just said I didn’t have it because I’ve held down a job and have awareness.
My question is, can you struggle with identity disturbance and not have BPD? I don’t act out, I don’t have rage, I keep very quiet, and try to better myself. However I loose my identity at the drop of a hat, and I can feel highs like I’m touching heaven when I’m doing something I love, or feel such anxiety or sadness when under stress that my jaw goes very tight and I can’t find words to speak. But, despite such emotional sensitivity, I don’t struggle with severe mood swings and haven’t ever received any feedback from family or friends to say I do
Obviously, I have to find diagnosis in person. However, I just wondered if it’s possible to experience identity crises and not have a personality disorder?
Thanks for reading my long comment :) x
i would see if i could get a diagnosis other than from just your therapist. the symptoms you described can still resonate as bpd. best of luck on your journey !!
I can aknowledge the impairments of self- disintegration of identity, change of directions, lack of decisiveness and commitment. But I am not hostile and tumultuous in relationships. I tend to isolate. Any thoughts?
People have a range of traits. These criteria are a guide only. People fluctuate. A disorder is on my present when it causes significant distress and impacts other domains of individuals life. Have a look at the amber heard video we did.
You can change the names but you can't change people and you can't change reality. That label is in part designed to determine how the individual labeled is to be treated from that point on. If that person is treated badly as a result so be it. Perhaps their behavior rightfully incites their own alienation or they are innocent. It almost doesn't matter when considering the, "now what", of the situation because people like to pick out one of their own and burn them at the stake on occasion.
In life whether you're a man or woman someone will decide to label you with whatever pejorative term that happens to fit their narrative and agenda. This will very likely effect how you are going to be treated. It's not fair but it's just a part of life.
People have been calling each other names since the spoken word and slinging 💩 before that. Unfortunately it's impossible to dodge every turd that's aimed at you but being aware of the situation helps to prepare for it. I'm not a fan of the Soft language especially in a professional setting because it's completely deceptive. Multiple names for one thing seems to be about confusing the individual tasked with disambiguation and it's sketchy. An example of this might be seeing, "evaporated cane juce", on an ingredients list at the store. Another classic example is how people could get by with stuff back in the day by changing their name.
There's something really dishonorable and unsportsmanlike to change up the terminology in attempt to bypass what has integrated itself into common sense. People should be allowed the chance to defend and properly represent themselves.
Awareness (common sense) of the situation that they walk into seems necessary for that.
I want to add that the sentiment of sparing feelings and all is nice. I have no doubt that there are people in the field with a benevolent attitude but the notion of it is little more than fumbling an attempt at compassion. The seeds of good intention might sprout but won't survive because the environment is inhospitable.
When the limbic system goes 'off on one' is that when a person could potentially do something rash?
Potentially - anger dyscontrol , impulsivity , aggression are indicators of increased Mesolimbic amygdala activation - could be exacerbated through reduced prefrontal cortex inhibition of the limbic system
Can you tell me something please? Something that I feel, if I knew, might help the healing process.
I was s/a when I was 3 years old and I remember feeling jealousy for the very first time at the age of 5.
This jealousy has continued throughout my adult life whenever I've been in a relationship. For the last 6 years I've avoided having a relationship, that was, up until August this year, when I met my partner.
I'm 100% certain he will always be faithful, that's not an issue for me, what I can't bare is him seeing an attractive woman, on the street, on TV, social media, newspapers etc. I
The thought of him being aroused, and distracted even for a second, crucifies me (and that's no exaggeration!). I'm sure it stems from the s/a.
I have to add, I was neglected emotionally by my parents, they had me late in life and I always felt I was most probably an accident. I feel that I probably 'jumped'on the attention I received from the family member who assaulted me, because of the neglect and when they told me they loved my sisters, I felt this intense jelousy since they were a threat to the attention I was getting. Does this theory sound right to you?
I'm 52 now and jealousy and fear are destroying a relationship with a man who I believe, genuinely loves me. I never see myself in terms of qualities, always in terms of sexiness. My partner says he wishes I could see the person he sees - loving, funny, caring etc. I've asked for help and been told I've a year to wait. Being in a relationship on a daily basis is unbearable most days with constant intrusive thoughts, but I don't want my past to win.
@@arabellacox sorry to hear. You seem to have a good psychological understanding. Psychological therapy individual and or connived can help further understanding and can provide strategies . Imago counselling - their book is considered a good book to help with relationships
@@PsychiatrySimplified thank you, I only just saw this!
Is there any good therapist that can provide DBT?
Need a real and urgent help 🙏🏻
Recommend you speak to local mental health services or if emergency please contact a local mental health crisis team
Can bpd person show narcissistic traits ?
Yes. For Kernberg, narcissistic - NPDs are a subtype of borderline personality disorders.
Pathological narcissism can only occur after the development of a self in which good and bad object representations have become integrated into a unified self-concept, whereas borderline personalities develop their pathology at a developmental stage prior to the development of stable ego boundaries.
Do you think that a lot of people with this disorder have ADHD as well? Like they have ADHD to begin with and they developed BPD as a a result of trauma?
Very good question. I’ve covered it in reasonable detail in the video link at end. . The answer is yes , depends and is also more common in females the combined adhd + bpd. This was the discussion in the Amber heard case What Mental Health Disorder Did Amber Heard Have? Exploring PTSD, BPD, & Complex PTSD
ruclips.net/video/XG5DKbR-H5k/видео.html
My family has many people with untreated personality disorders, schizophrenia, autism, mood disorders and it passes on down the line. I feel like the entire lineage is cursed. Imagine calling a shit ton of loners,black sheeps and rejects a “family.” So much damage done a lot of our younger generation has already died. I notice women that come have children with the family die. Not a drop of love in any of the family the only time they join together is when they have a common enemy aka me. The black sheep of the black sheeps 😂 I call them out on all their bullshit and sometimes it comes out in the form of extreme rage. I’m tired of being walked all over and kicked by a bunch of fucking bullies. Then I also went out and had a child with a guy that has almost a mirrored family to mine. I feel smothered by toxicity
Just diagnosed this Thursday after 11 years of being told it’s manic bipolar and depression when the psychiatrist said it was not possible to diagnose a child with it lmaooooo all those drugs for absolutely nothing
I can relate
My mom has this disorder as well as other mental issues I've seen the decline in my moms mental health and now its physical I have so much empathy for my mom even though I had to walk away it's been almost 3 years sense I seen or spoken to her unfortunately she refuses to get any medical help because she is absolutely terrified of people judging her even though she hasn't said why but until she gets helps she will continue to fall my mom lost her house her job her husband her family she lost financially spiritually emotionally and mentally everything has been stripped away and its absolutely nothing I can do to help her it's so sad I truly think my mom is killing herself at this point bpd is no joke when it is untreated,I also believe she is a full blown narcissist and possessed by a demonic spirit..I say that because my mom started getting into witchcraft and dark magic randomly with no knowledge of what shes doing she roams the streets late at night for no reason and sold her car and all her belongings even though she needed it I'm terrified of her and for her,shes all over the place,she cant drive cook clean nothing she wasn't always this bad but it got worse and worse and worse she is a danger to herself and me and the people who love her..its like shes not in control of her own thoughts or body any more I've never seen anything like this in a human being I never thought this would happen to my mom..
Sorry to hear. Hope she gets help.
It IS mental illness....
How do I not push people away? I really want to open myself up to a loving romantic relationship but I close myself off from people for fear they’ll abandon me.
Good question. Psychotherapy can really help. Usually trauma underlies these responses with defences. So schema are present that prevents attachment for fear of abandonment and rejection and further emotional regulation aspects keep the sympathetic system on high threat. DBT / schema therapy can help address these that can help reform stable attachments.
When you feel like splitting on your partner, isolate yourself for couple of days and do nothing. When feelings of dread are gone than you can think logically and not leave your significant other.... that is for start :)
@@PsychiatrySimplified Please suggest a good therapist or place for psychotherapy. I am from India and have tried few therapist but it wasn't helpful.
@@snehalsharma9856 sorry this is not something that we can recommend as unaware of any.
What does the person do and we see sometging is wrong and we say he or she has bpd
It is a really good question. It is challenging sometimes for someone to recognise that help is available. In order for that the initial step comes from the person recognising that they are experiencing a mental illness that is treatable. In some cases it takes time, encouragement can help/ them discussing with the doctor can help. Ultimately no easy answers. Wish you well
@Omar Zazzle?
The doctor talks too fast without proper pauses...I found this difficult to follow.
Thank you for your feedback. Will keep this in mind for future videos.
Not really sure if this is treatable or not. I have it, apparently, and it seems to be getting worse and worse. Don't want to continue on like this.
Recently diagnosed was put forward for “life skills” course showed signs of my BPD and the women running the course did NOT work through my feelings and found it unacceptable that someone would show symptoms of the very disorder they are diagnosed with. How is that even helpful!??
This can be feedback provided to the therapists. It's important to recognise that therapy involves a therapist - patient relationship - and in that relationship the patient can / should be able to express issues arising in therapy. Hope this helps.
@@PsychiatrySimplified i told her at the time that i wasnt going to apologise for being triggered thats the nature of the beast and you would think professionals would understand that? I was really hopeful for this course but i quit on the spot and they didn’t even try to convince me otherwise
@@Tsunami1.618 sorry to hear. For BPD - therapists should be experienced in at least basic skills of dbt. Not all psychologists are dbt trained. The evidence based treatment for BPD is DBT. There are others but DBT has most evidence of efficacy.
@@PsychiatrySimplified i know the change had to come from me i understand that and im pretty emotionally mature in most areas and felt a bit advanced for the group as i was talking about realisations i had had and they were like “oh we cover that in week 5” blah blah and it felt like i was messing up the order of their course and they didnt like it. Anyway back to the drawing board again! Im 48 now and im sick of this shit.
@@Tsunami1.618 good luck with your journey. Wish you well.
I always wonder why it is named borderline?why not just personality disorder..
Good question. Personality disorders are divided into multiple types. According to Shedler - The term “borderline” dates back to a time when psychiatric classification distinguished primarily between neurotic and psychotic disturbance based on intact versus impaired reality testing. Over time, clinical writers began describing patients on the “border,” who seemed neither neurotic nor psychotic. The diagnostic construct has evolved, but the term “borderline” remains. See here the debate between the diagnoses - This is the Amber heard video where the psychologists disagreed. ruclips.net/video/XG5DKbR-H5k/видео.html
@@PsychiatrySimplified thank you dr for answering
@@nat_tasha9068 Pleasure
it is not a psychodynamic term... it originates from psychoanalysis - neurosis - psychosis - and another group of people would not fit in the previous categories proper... so the term... at the border of psychosis...but not really psychotic etc.....
Yes you are correct.