Absolute Mad Lads - The Nuclear Boy Scout

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  • Опубликовано: 24 ноя 2024

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  • @HPCAT88
    @HPCAT88 3 месяца назад +7598

    His eyes say Count Dankula, but his double chin says Count Chocula.

    • @Scrobbles5683
      @Scrobbles5683 3 месяца назад +288

      He'll sneak in at night to drink your Irn Bru and Buckfast

    • @TERMINATOR-0002
      @TERMINATOR-0002 3 месяца назад +109

      Now I'd buy a count chocula, over mr.Beast feastavals any day.

    • @randylahey2242
      @randylahey2242 3 месяца назад +49

      i miss mooslim count dankula:(

    • @austinslaughter319
      @austinslaughter319 3 месяца назад +33

      This comment is funnier than his reaction.

    • @danielbrowniel
      @danielbrowniel 3 месяца назад +4

      count chocula doesn have a double chin tho..
      Your joke is WEEEEAK

  • @Fahqth
    @Fahqth 3 месяца назад +4867

    I now understand why babies cry when their dad shaves his face

    • @joecentral-o9984
      @joecentral-o9984 3 месяца назад +29

      😂

    • @stelmaria-mx
      @stelmaria-mx 3 месяца назад +82

      I cried when I saw it too

    • @TookieMacSpookie
      @TookieMacSpookie 3 месяца назад +14

      😂😂😂 o snap that was very good

    • @TheCamSays
      @TheCamSays 3 месяца назад +42

      This isn't Dank, this is his evil twin brother.

    • @jerk5959
      @jerk5959 3 месяца назад

      @@TheCamSays His brother: Stank.

  • @allfire666
    @allfire666 3 месяца назад +2552

    "There are no sponsors today"
    Dude got so angry at his razor that he canceled a Manscaped sponsorship

    • @brianquint6126
      @brianquint6126 2 месяца назад

      Legit I think this is what happened and Manscaped deserves it. WTF does 10 mean if not 10mm!!??!?

    • @some1online2
      @some1online2 2 месяца назад +105

      "With manscaped at least my below bits don't look as bad as my face!"

    • @daviddavidson2357
      @daviddavidson2357 2 месяца назад +28

      Jokes on him if he used the shite he shills lmao

    • @augustusguap228
      @augustusguap228 2 месяца назад

      @@daviddavidson2357 manscaped is alright tho. for sure way too expensive but their products aren't shit. I've had a lot worse lol

    • @deadsi
      @deadsi 2 месяца назад

      Ye his sponsors is literally the Chinese trying to destroy the west by selling their cheap crap to us, except this is the propaganda campaign, they make it expensive and have some beardless pinko shill it so you think your buying quality and you slowly get conditioned to getting cheapo plastic shish and accepting it as the norm. Next thing you know.. We're buying plastic tanks from China for our military

  • @kizmo2317
    @kizmo2317 2 месяца назад +171

    My son got the Nuclear Science merit badge for his Eagle. When doing his interview with his counselor (a professor at a local university), the first question he asked my son was "You're not going to be the next Nuclear Boy Scout, are you?"

  • @Ddot223
    @Ddot223 3 месяца назад +1176

    Without the beard he's no longer a count, only a baron.

    • @AteshSeruhn
      @AteshSeruhn 3 месяца назад +27

      I second the notion that Dank call himself a Barpn while the beard grows back😂

    • @CoyoteFH
      @CoyoteFH 3 месяца назад +20

      Hail, Baron Dankula!

    • @scockery
      @scockery 3 месяца назад +10

      I thought Sue was the barren one? Oh, too sue-n?

    • @NigelAnderson-iu2bs
      @NigelAnderson-iu2bs 2 месяца назад +6

      @@CoyoteFH No, No, He's Baron Chinula at present

    • @EmpyreanRagnarok
      @EmpyreanRagnarok 2 месяца назад +9

      Viscount Dankula

  • @inseparabletheband
    @inseparabletheband 3 месяца назад +1989

    HAHAHAHAHA!!! WHAT A BABY!!! A LITTLE TINY BABY BOY!!!!

    • @MV-69-MV
      @MV-69-MV 3 месяца назад +37

      We have all been there bro

    • @spidermanspidertheman3650
      @spidermanspidertheman3650 3 месяца назад

      ​​@@MV-69-MVhello bro i am from denmark

    • @RebSike
      @RebSike 3 месяца назад +65

      aye a wee lettel babeh

    • @_Boobear_
      @_Boobear_ 3 месяца назад +4

      😂

    • @scockery
      @scockery 3 месяца назад +33

      "Git in me belly!"

  • @KaguyaQuincy
    @KaguyaQuincy 2 месяца назад +610

    Big thanks to Mark's infant son for guest hosting this one

  • @cullenpurkis4593
    @cullenpurkis4593 2 месяца назад +63

    I live near his house. You can still detect the radiation a quarter mile away. It's not bad, but still detectable

  • @MattChez
    @MattChez 2 месяца назад +660

    This is why I like Dank.
    He knows people are going to make jokes about him.
    But does he complain? Does he get defensive?
    NO! He acts like a man, and just takes it on the chins.

    • @sid2112
      @sid2112 2 месяца назад +14

      Hehehe

    • @fuqupal
      @fuqupal 2 месяца назад

      Getting defensive on the web is social suicide.
      Every fucking idiot on the planet knows that.

    • @Wilson_the_Mannequin
      @Wilson_the_Mannequin 2 месяца назад +6

      Dankula is smarter and funnier than I thought :). I need to watch this channel more

    • @picklerick2200
      @picklerick2200 2 месяца назад +11

      You had me right until the end, that was class 😂😂

    • @TySoVm
      @TySoVm 2 месяца назад +7

      He actually took it off his chin.

  • @bigoats3332
    @bigoats3332 3 месяца назад +725

    Fitting for a boy scout to tell us about the Nuclear Boy Scout

  • @ResolvezDubstep
    @ResolvezDubstep 3 месяца назад +1255

    I showed this to my girlfriend who wants me to shave my beard for our wedding, you're the best possible reason not to do it. Thanks mate, taking one for the team !

    • @lmno567
      @lmno567 3 месяца назад +19

      What did she say?

    • @ResolvezDubstep
      @ResolvezDubstep 3 месяца назад +138

      @@lmno567 she was speechless, and that's the first time since i met her 🤣

    • @JimmehRulez
      @JimmehRulez 3 месяца назад +10

      Peak

    • @kwazhims3lf
      @kwazhims3lf 3 месяца назад +50

      Shave it for the divorce

    • @settame1
      @settame1 3 месяца назад +23

      My husband decided to grow a beard for the first time for our wedding after seeing our engagement photos. I’m so glad he did.

  • @Falconer22
    @Falconer22 2 месяца назад +10

    Why is Dank reminding me of a medieval baby from one of those paintings where the baby has a 5 oclock shadow? Those kids are terrifying!

  • @whrlds
    @whrlds 3 месяца назад +849

    Beardless Dank can't hurt you:
    Beardless Dank:

  • @atomictaste4355
    @atomictaste4355 2 месяца назад +323

    "Ive got baby face" That poor baby has clearly been booted round the head a couple times

  • @markmarkson4455
    @markmarkson4455 3 месяца назад +3108

    The divorce was soo bad she took the beard too

    • @DjDoomtrain
      @DjDoomtrain 3 месяца назад +31

      😂😅

    • @scockery
      @scockery 3 месяца назад +199

      That's cold...like Dank's face is now without that fur.

    • @DjDoomtrain
      @DjDoomtrain 3 месяца назад +7

      @@scockery hahhahahaahha lmao

    • @Darkstarsovereign
      @Darkstarsovereign 3 месяца назад +8

      Savage

    • @ottomackensen
      @ottomackensen 3 месяца назад +27

      Savage Sue

  • @mogadeet6857
    @mogadeet6857 2 месяца назад +39

    Of course they had to justify their actions as being against a terrorist. It's the catch-all phrase that absolves them from being held accountable.

    • @Videogeek95
      @Videogeek95 2 месяца назад

      Are you saying you want a psychotic skitzo to have a fucking nuke?

  • @JakobIlar
    @JakobIlar 3 месяца назад +428

    In the US, before 9/11, a young child could get almost any chemical from an industrial, or educational supply store by uttering the phrase: "I need it for a school project..."

    • @Cowboycomando54
      @Cowboycomando54 3 месяца назад +53

      Hell, you could buy explosives at hardware stores in some states.

    • @fffoolishnomore3834
      @fffoolishnomore3834 3 месяца назад +69

      Sounds like a great time and place to live in

    • @halo7oo
      @halo7oo 3 месяца назад +45

      You also used to be able to buy alcohol at a grocery store by saying: "It's for my parents"

    • @PrivacyTermsCopyriii
      @PrivacyTermsCopyriii 3 месяца назад +37

      @@Cowboycomando54still can, it’s called Tannerite lol.

    • @puckered6036
      @puckered6036 3 месяца назад +3

      You can buy tanerite still 😂 ​@Cowboycomando54

  • @fetusdeletus9266
    @fetusdeletus9266 3 месяца назад +1087

    Oh no they stole his masculinity. They took his Scottish authority!

    • @vedranb87
      @vedranb87 3 месяца назад +20

      Now he'll have to buy the Lairdship from that sponsor that shall not be named.

    • @forgotmcmyaccount9588
      @forgotmcmyaccount9588 3 месяца назад +7

      estrogen in the water supply has finaly kicked in

    • @andyfriederichsen
      @andyfriederichsen 3 месяца назад +6

      You don't need facial hair to be masculine.

    • @fetusdeletus9266
      @fetusdeletus9266 3 месяца назад +7

      @@andyfriederichsen Dank does

    • @oraakkeli
      @oraakkeli 3 месяца назад +1

      Lmao i was about to comment "Scottish, not British", and then i checked the comment again and it had already been fixed 😂😂

  • @nickpineau4139
    @nickpineau4139 2 месяца назад +380

    Seeing the thumbnail with a beardless Count Dankula jump scared me more than any other horror film I’ve seen in the past 5 years.

    • @sanadbenali6993
      @sanadbenali6993 2 месяца назад +1

      Are you not on the electric bogoloo

  • @teddnaing6851
    @teddnaing6851 2 месяца назад +25

    Where's Dankula? And no, I'm not getting into your van for candy!!

  • @r.speirs
    @r.speirs 3 месяца назад +265

    “You know carbs are the enemy.”
    - Count Chinula

    • @gamingbraveheart831
      @gamingbraveheart831 2 месяца назад +1

      I can’t unsee that that now. While grabbing my own recently shaved chin

    • @WhyDoBabiesStareAtMe
      @WhyDoBabiesStareAtMe 2 месяца назад

      You'd think he be more worried about razors now.

  • @spub1031
    @spub1031 3 месяца назад +215

    The smoke detector going off at 9:52 is a nice touch that made me check my fire alarm.

    • @TheJcris87
      @TheJcris87 3 месяца назад +4

      Yo, same

    • @captainsancho1237
      @captainsancho1237 3 месяца назад +7

      Had to rewatch that bit to make sure I wasn’t crazy.

    • @MrMajomfasz
      @MrMajomfasz 2 месяца назад +1

      N

    • @hank1556
      @hank1556 2 месяца назад

      Are you black?

    • @PhysicallyDetarded
      @PhysicallyDetarded 2 месяца назад

      It went off as he said "smoke detector" as well. Pretty funny too be honest.

  • @thepenguinhouse
    @thepenguinhouse 3 месяца назад +324

    Homer Simpson is a lot more Scottish than i remember.

  • @palaceofwisdom9448
    @palaceofwisdom9448 2 месяца назад +61

    "I put my shaver on the highest setting and it shaved a lot. How could I have known?"
    You're going to be an almost sitcom level fun dad.

    • @kiritotheabridgedgod4178
      @kiritotheabridgedgod4178 2 месяца назад +11

      In all fairness, with hair trimmers, bigger number means more hair. Can't exactly blame him for thinking it applies to all hair trimmers.

  • @GGPlex_
    @GGPlex_ 3 месяца назад +274

    “Aren’t you a little young to be building a nuclear reactor?”
    “Yes, yes I am.”

    • @johndunn1625
      @johndunn1625 2 месяца назад +19

      "Ferb, I know what we're going to do today!"

    • @Videogeek95
      @Videogeek95 2 месяца назад +7

      @@johndunn1625 "MOOOM!!! Phineas and Ferb are building a nuclear reactor!!!"

  • @walternelson2687
    @walternelson2687 3 месяца назад +617

    "And smoke detectors-" **BEEP**
    I was NOT expecting that. Dankula gained at least 10% melanin just by doing that.

    • @ninjanunch27
      @ninjanunch27 2 месяца назад +26

      Underrated comment 😂

    • @LeLabersack
      @LeLabersack 2 месяца назад +45

      he is now the blackest Scotsman

    • @tendymancommeth
      @tendymancommeth 2 месяца назад

      he is now a normal white person.

    • @captainhanpritcher
      @captainhanpritcher 2 месяца назад +5

      ​@LeLabersack Not quite. You ever heard of a man by the name of Idi Amin?
      Speaking of Madlad material...

    • @F0reman371
      @F0reman371 2 месяца назад +18

      @@LeLabersack What makes him a good Demoman?

  • @UnOc2
    @UnOc2 3 месяца назад +118

    I appreciate Count Dankula's dedication - he went out of his way to look like a boy for this episode where he talks about a Boy Scout. Bravo!

    • @TERMINATOR-0002
      @TERMINATOR-0002 3 месяца назад

      the dedication is truly remarkable

    • @The13thRonin
      @The13thRonin 3 месяца назад +1

      I liked the one where he did the segment on the cannibal and he looked like a cannibal.

  • @Gallaelwyd
    @Gallaelwyd 2 месяца назад +3

    Quick facts: Americium (ah-meh-ri-see-um) can't radiate through dust and smoke particles. It radiates towards a sensor, when the smoke goes between the sensor and americium, the radiation gets disrupted, which is when the smoke detector sounds the alarm.

  • @raistmajere7477
    @raistmajere7477 3 месяца назад +329

    When David learned that nothing would happen to him since he didn't technically break any law, I'm sure he thought "Whew, that was one hell of a close shave".
    👀

    • @dangerdave138
      @dangerdave138 3 месяца назад

      😂

    • @kadobrr1229
      @kadobrr1229 2 месяца назад

      💀

    • @XenRiddle
      @XenRiddle 2 месяца назад

      *Count Dankula leans to the side, smiles, cue rimshot*

  • @danjacksonguitar3701
    @danjacksonguitar3701 2 месяца назад +130

    Not since Norm MacDonald have I heard such tongue-in-cheek self deprecation, acceptance, and seething anger combined so hilariously.

  • @MurilloDelgado-m3l
    @MurilloDelgado-m3l 3 месяца назад +225

    He ended up looking just like the pugs he owns

    • @samholdsworth420
      @samholdsworth420 3 месяца назад +19

      His girl left him. Took the pugs as well 😂
      No joke

    • @daviddavidson2357
      @daviddavidson2357 3 месяца назад +11

      @@samholdsworth420 Did she take the beard as well?

    • @Kalkas53
      @Kalkas53 3 месяца назад +3

      @@daviddavidson2357 she was his beard

    • @boosted_spirit
      @boosted_spirit 3 месяца назад

      I think the pug had a cute little moustache

    • @LagrangePoint0
      @LagrangePoint0 2 месяца назад +9

      hippity hoppity, she took the kids and the property... and the beard.

  • @rucker69
    @rucker69 2 месяца назад +5

    "unforeseen consequences" was a nice hl2 touch

  • @fiel81
    @fiel81 3 месяца назад +136

    Hey little boy, have you seen Dankula around?

  • @monk864
    @monk864 3 месяца назад +129

    It's good that dank can take a break and can get his 8 year old nephew to stand in. The Young Lad does a great impression

  • @al5harpton105
    @al5harpton105 3 месяца назад +225

    You were drunk shaving, weren’t you? Been there! 🤣🤣🤣

    • @joecentral-o9984
      @joecentral-o9984 3 месяца назад +12

      Why I don't shave high.... 😂

    • @Sanguinius0420
      @Sanguinius0420 3 месяца назад +9

      Lmao
      We've all been there.

    • @Grandmaster-Kush
      @Grandmaster-Kush 3 месяца назад +2

      It's when you get complacent and you think "Maybe it's not so bad without the beard might look younger..." been there with both beard and the hair ontop, now both kept long.

    • @Bl4ckD0g
      @Bl4ckD0g 3 месяца назад +6

      ​​@@Grandmaster-KushI shaved once to see what my face looked like since I lost weight. Never again.

    • @ScottLovenberg
      @ScottLovenberg 3 месяца назад

      Home bro is legit happy he didn't start with manscaping.

  • @athrun2
    @athrun2 2 месяца назад +2

    I've seen so many vids of you without the hair, that it's nice to have the backstory to it now.

  • @assssssssss1000
    @assssssssss1000 3 месяца назад +90

    The 10 setting is for "10 year old boy." This is why I havent shaved my goatee in 20 years.

  • @Czargonaut
    @Czargonaut 3 месяца назад +61

    Dropped to my knees started crying and throwing up in Kroger when he turned around

  • @shotgunsurgeon3849
    @shotgunsurgeon3849 3 месяца назад +152

    This videobrought to you by MANSCAPED

    • @vedranb87
      @vedranb87 3 месяца назад +10

      :D You win!

    • @Alex.H.B.1970something
      @Alex.H.B.1970something 3 месяца назад

      Why does Anyone want to look like a pre pubesant child for crying out loud!?!

    • @Alex.H.B.1970something
      @Alex.H.B.1970something 3 месяца назад

      This includes so called men who don't love the full bush on their wives,or girlfriends.

    • @Voodoo_Robot
      @Voodoo_Robot 3 месяца назад +8

      Babyscaped

    • @joecentral-o9984
      @joecentral-o9984 3 месяца назад +3

      For real😂​@@Voodoo_Robot

  • @christopherflores8193
    @christopherflores8193 2 месяца назад +1

    Thank you for this video Daz Games

  • @Pantsinabucket
    @Pantsinabucket 3 месяца назад +235

    9:50 putting that smoke detector beep right as you say the word is fucking GOLD

    • @BAdtnl
      @BAdtnl 3 месяца назад +12

      So good I went back to confirm I actually heard it 😂🤌🏼

    • @Sujjin21
      @Sujjin21 3 месяца назад +2

      I died 🤣

    • @dillonkillen6044
      @dillonkillen6044 3 месяца назад +14

      I thought maybe dank had a little African in him suddenly.

    • @Frankmccluskey
      @Frankmccluskey 3 месяца назад

      COD lobby gold

    • @matthewjones2942
      @matthewjones2942 3 месяца назад +2

      I am so glad I'm not the only one who noticed that lmao😂

  • @BrianRRenfro
    @BrianRRenfro 3 месяца назад +162

    Dank looks like all he wants in life is a brand new pair of New Balance shoes, some jean shorts, and a Corvette.

    • @dekin819
      @dekin819 3 месяца назад +2

      are they white New balances Corvette gold 🕺

    • @micnorton9487
      @micnorton9487 3 месяца назад

      And an oz of decent Bolivian marching powder lol ...

    • @whatsthebigfndeal
      @whatsthebigfndeal 2 месяца назад +1

      New Balance shoes are awesome. Granted, I'm old but, still, they're really comfortable.

    • @edwhatshisname3562
      @edwhatshisname3562 2 месяца назад +2

      @@micnorton9487 "Marching powder"...
      Thanks, a new slang has been added to my vocabulary.

    • @NoLove0341
      @NoLove0341 2 месяца назад +2

      Wrong! That face says crocs and cargo pants all day.

  • @MAGGOT_VOMIT
    @MAGGOT_VOMIT 3 месяца назад +74

    Bearded Dank looked like a brawler.
    Beardless Dank looks like he wants to run, jump and play with the other little boys.

    • @jcmick8430
      @jcmick8430 2 месяца назад +2

      He looks like a pizza delivery boy

    • @TheWanderer1000000
      @TheWanderer1000000 2 месяца назад +1

      Yeah that was stupid.

    • @benkersten1705
      @benkersten1705 2 месяца назад +10

      @@TheWanderer1000000he’s saying he looks like child

    • @munky342
      @munky342 2 месяца назад +8

      ​@@TheWanderer1000000thinking isn't a strong point for you, is it.

  • @The_Big_Jay
    @The_Big_Jay 2 месяца назад +14

    Dank, you might've had better luck in your court case if you looked like this. Who would prosecute such a cute, widdle guy?

  • @Blazin130
    @Blazin130 3 месяца назад +168

    Hello, officers? Yes, it might look like I'm watching a 12 year old boy on the internet, but I can explain!

    • @ahardworker2154
      @ahardworker2154 2 месяца назад +10

      Don't worry just say your Trans and you'll be ok in fact you'll even get people defending you

    • @jakesouthern4050
      @jakesouthern4050 2 месяца назад +3

      @@ahardworker2154one joke

    • @jemm113
      @jemm113 2 месяца назад +4

      @@jakesouthern4050 …amongst many

    • @Xeirn
      @Xeirn 2 месяца назад +2

      @@jakesouthern4050 I prefer letting the jokes hang a bit.

  • @TheCozplayer
    @TheCozplayer 3 месяца назад +173

    “I thought it meant 10 millimeters”
    God that reminds me so much of that one 4chan text post talking about how in Africa, a certain militia thought that the numbers and dials on the rifles meant it would make the gun shoot harder lmfaoooo

    • @Bl4ckD0g
      @Bl4ckD0g 3 месяца назад +30

      Don't forget the infamous "Sniper Button" known as a Forward Assist.

    • @Safexscape
      @Safexscape 3 месяца назад +17

      Yes, lore has it that you could also use the forward assist to “to pump up your ammunition for a more devastating charge” 😂 geniuses

    • @PrivacyTermsCopyriii
      @PrivacyTermsCopyriii 3 месяца назад

      That was the Rhodesian Bush War @TheCozplayer
      Those handsome devils in their bush hats and short shorts would recover the weapons of the filthy commie scum after liberating them of their need for oxygen, only to find they were never in danger because the sights were dialled to the absolute maximum, literally indirect fire, probably hit some random innocent civilian in a different state (some things don’t change with the continent, after all).
      They eventually interrogated a captured enemy and asked about it, being given the answer about the gun “shooting harder” because “bigger number mean bigger bang”.
      Apparently the survivors of the commies in Rhodesia are the same people who taught US Democrats how firearms work, based on the similarly stupid ideas.

    • @duderitoz6953
      @duderitoz6953 3 месяца назад +10

      Very common around the world for shamans & the like to bless rifles in order to shoot better, or so they think.

    • @LukSter18998
      @LukSter18998 3 месяца назад +6

      what did they paint themselves red also??

  • @zenzebra2967
    @zenzebra2967 3 месяца назад +51

    I can't believe all it took to finally scare the sponsors away was a shave.

  • @Tropicanax7x
    @Tropicanax7x 2 месяца назад +2

    I love the chair creek when you came to a stop with your extremely enthusiastic expression after turning around to face the camera for the intro 😂

  • @yoshiforpm
    @yoshiforpm 3 месяца назад +26

    “He just went for it when he probably shouldn’t have” is a summary of the lives of so many legends.

  • @HeathenGeek
    @HeathenGeek 3 месяца назад +67

    anyone with an interest in engineering who stumbles across the work done at the Oak Ridge National Labs work with Thorium reactors in the 60's usually comes to the same conclusion as David Hahn: the world's energy problems were basically solved THEN, and if only someone could get a Liquid Fluoride Thorium Reactor (LFTR)working, the world's energy problems would be solved NOW.
    But, due to a decision by an army general, the quest for nuclear power went in another direction.
    That's what he was trying to build, a reactor (LFTR) that would solve the world's energy problems, that would use existing nuclear waste as fuel (once running), produced waste that was only radioactive for 300 years (instead of the current 10,000), and that if a meltdown occurred, the whole liquid reactor would cool down and turn into a chunk of solid rock (salt).
    These reactors will happen, but about 100 years later than they could have.
    And when the world has solved this problem, it can then move on to solving the problem of a beard trimmer that measures in mm, not whatever they're using now. On the bright side, it won't be long until it looks like you're giving that squirrel a blw job again.

    • @FirstFamilyCharger
      @FirstFamilyCharger 3 месяца назад +6

      Masterful

    • @jimbob6490
      @jimbob6490 3 месяца назад +12

      You are the only other person I have ever seen mention or even know of this f****** experiment incredible I thought I was the only one I learned from a friend in school when I was a kid

    • @tambo_matt
      @tambo_matt 3 месяца назад +6

      @@jimbob6490 its commonly known among us senior netizens lol

    • @гига-нигга
      @гига-нигга Месяц назад

      will they happen? we're chasing the pipe dream of fusion now

  • @siemhendriks3265
    @siemhendriks3265 3 месяца назад +118

    The count went nuclear on his beard

  • @tomforkan4476
    @tomforkan4476 2 месяца назад +1

    5 years of watching dankula and baby dank is the hardest ive ever laughed at a vid

  • @andrewryanwasright
    @andrewryanwasright 2 месяца назад +28

    Without the beard Dankula just looks like an American HVAC technician who can’t pass a drug test

    • @zhuyu9268
      @zhuyu9268 2 месяца назад +1

      Gave me a good laugh with this one 😂

  • @beeeennnnnnn
    @beeeennnnnnn 3 месяца назад +91

    HOOOOLY I DIDNT EXPECT A JUMPSCARE IMMEDIATELY AT THAT START OF THE VIDEO

  • @BitmanBro
    @BitmanBro 3 месяца назад +29

    okay the soft beep after saying "smoke detectors" was a solid joke
    genuinely thought that it was one of mine before i remembered i don't fucken own any

    • @settame1
      @settame1 3 месяца назад +1

      This was so good. 😂

  • @ALovelyBunchOfDragonballz
    @ALovelyBunchOfDragonballz 2 месяца назад +9

    "Back in my day I funded a rocket program just by cutting grass...."

  • @humanskull182
    @humanskull182 2 месяца назад +61

    I've got a similar trimming story. I was hungover as hell, getting ready for a job interview so I gave myself a trim. Didn't realize the bloody guard was the length for my mustache and cut my beard almost to the skin.
    I looked like a thumb for about a week

  • @vladdracula3
    @vladdracula3 3 месяца назад +38

    I don't know who this cracked out 12yr old is, but damn his Dank impression is on point.

  • @Evaunit98
    @Evaunit98 3 месяца назад +37

    The nuclear nerd will shine bright forever, even if we can’t see it in his lead lined coffin

  • @annefrankenberry7914
    @annefrankenberry7914 2 месяца назад +2

    The cops asking to search his car and the trunk being radioactive reminded me of that scene in Repo Man where the patrolman opens the trunk and evaporates.

  • @professornuke7562
    @professornuke7562 2 месяца назад +61

    I first heard of this guy before he joined the Navy. I'm a Nuclear Medicine Technologist, and one of our medical physicists presented it at a continuing education session in the early 1990's. Followed it over the years, because I was also in the Scouts!

    • @Hammerback0
      @Hammerback0 2 месяца назад

      I had no idea Dankula went to the Navy.
      Keep in mind, smartasses run rampant in Mr. Baby face Dankulas comment section. 😂.
      No disrespect intended.

  • @mhomer89
    @mhomer89 3 месяца назад +54

    Too early to leave the galaxy
    Too late to build a nuclear reactor
    Right on time to see Dankula become civilized

    • @TheRealMycanthrope
      @TheRealMycanthrope 2 месяца назад +4

      There's nothing civilised about the state of that head.

  • @geoffreymarkII
    @geoffreymarkII 2 месяца назад +61

    "He must've been an absolute fucking menace at mowing those lawns!" LMFAO 🤣

  • @goonercamerawiper8662
    @goonercamerawiper8662 2 месяца назад +1

    Dank, you turned into the thing you taught your dog to hate the most... Ethen Klein.

  • @tamasmihaly1
    @tamasmihaly1 3 месяца назад +24

    “ Autistic fixation with chemistry”= Intellectual curiosity.

    • @synthWizkid
      @synthWizkid 3 месяца назад +4

      Strike that. Reverse it...

  • @realreallynow
    @realreallynow 3 месяца назад +28

    dude you should of covered how he ended up in the shed. his dad kicked him out of the basement because he kept almost destroying the house.

    • @settame1
      @settame1 3 месяца назад +9

      Chemistry departments are almost always on the top floor of science buildings. There’s a reason.
      They also tend to be very close to the taller buildings so when there is a fire that building can be a blast shield.

  • @Dezeo
    @Dezeo 3 месяца назад +23

    Your trimmer was on-board with the boy scout theme.

  • @flynncostello291
    @flynncostello291 2 месяца назад

    This is a mad lads video I've wanted you to make for ages, having put a few comments on past videos requesting it
    As always this video covered it to top spec, and taught me new things I didn't know about him before, you smashed it as always!

  • @SuperTommox
    @SuperTommox 3 месяца назад +23

    "My trunk is radioactive" is crazy 😂

    • @williwonti
      @williwonti 3 месяца назад +3

      "Radiation. Yes indeed. You hear the most outrageous lies about it.."

    • @simonnachreiner8380
      @simonnachreiner8380 3 месяца назад +1

      That patrol officer be like👀!

    • @synthWizkid
      @synthWizkid 3 месяца назад

      🐘

  • @crominion6045
    @crominion6045 3 месяца назад +27

    David did not die. That was clearly a cover story. He actually went on to become Duke Nukem.

  • @puckered6036
    @puckered6036 3 месяца назад +14

    You just went from a member of a grimy hardcore band to a guy who sells boat insurance in Boca Raton. 😮😂

  • @dorkmcgork9149
    @dorkmcgork9149 2 месяца назад

    Your sense of humor is incredible. Without flaw.

  • @-KillaWatt-
    @-KillaWatt- 3 месяца назад +47

    "Aye, shave and you may die. Run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the shaves, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell your razor that they may take our beards, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!"

    • @scockery
      @scockery 3 месяца назад +2

      Did William Wahl-lace say that?

    • @GM-Mermaid
      @GM-Mermaid 2 месяца назад

      😂

  • @grapple_r3356
    @grapple_r3356 3 месяца назад +32

    A dollar shave club ad-read or 2 would've saved his beard.

    • @thatlittlevoice6354
      @thatlittlevoice6354 3 месяца назад +1

      A very simple cursory look at the equipment and directions would have saved it.

  • @elgandos2
    @elgandos2 3 месяца назад +11

    Dank! Dont let the haters get to you! I think its nice to see you all cleaned up! Dont forget; we love our special little baby boy just the way he is

  • @chandlerpeters6086
    @chandlerpeters6086 2 месяца назад

    Thanks for the years of content my man, I gotta say you are only youtuber I have with notifications

  • @jazminhilserop8770
    @jazminhilserop8770 3 месяца назад +37

    I'm a bearded man myself, and fully feel your pain. I felt the disturbance in the force when all those innocents were suddenly gone. The only good to come of this, is that I know now the reason for the unexpected tears I shed. RIP Dankhairs, they've gone to a better place 🙏.

    • @paulnash9851
      @paulnash9851 2 месяца назад

      “Bearded man”
      Woman’s account/pfp.
      Checks out... 🤦🏻‍♂️🤡

    • @gackybass
      @gackybass Месяц назад

      ​@@paulnash9851 One of those Thai fellows...

  • @GreatGagsGaming
    @GreatGagsGaming 2 месяца назад +107

    8:55 - Breeder Reactor?... As in _Microfusion_ Breeder?...
    _"... Those Spurs, They Jingle, Jangle, Jingle~...."_

    • @silence___
      @silence___ 2 месяца назад +18

      _“jingle jangle”_

    • @wtfsamusidk7574
      @wtfsamusidk7574 2 месяца назад +8

      ​@@silence___BIG IRON!!!!!

    • @dark2023-1lovesoni
      @dark2023-1lovesoni 2 месяца назад +9

      Technically, his was only a mini-fusion breeder, but he was headed the right direction, I guess.

    • @Georg3Nada
      @Georg3Nada 2 месяца назад

      Dem spurs be jangling

    • @robglysen
      @robglysen 2 месяца назад

      Maybe a fast breeder like Dounreay?

  • @DrmedRasen-iz1qw
    @DrmedRasen-iz1qw 3 месяца назад +19

    We just unlocked the mid aged American dad Count Dankula skin

  • @bettyadamsoveranalyzes
    @bettyadamsoveranalyzes 2 месяца назад

    Oh my word!
    The *chirp*
    When you first said 'smoke detector'.
    I nearly went and check mine. 🤣😂😅

  • @qliphalpuzzle5453
    @qliphalpuzzle5453 3 месяца назад +30

    I call this Count Dankula’s beardless era

  • @occamsrazor1285
    @occamsrazor1285 3 месяца назад +18

    17:10 In case anyone is interested: A2W = Surface Fleet Reactor (A), reactor version design by Manufacture (2), manufacturer (W for Westinghouse)
    Technically, the A means "Aircraft Carrier", but "surface fleet" is a decent shorthand, and is opposed to "subsurface fleet". Only aircraft carriers (surface) and submarines (subsurface) have nuclear reactors. There was a time when we had nuclear cruisers too, and their reactors were C1Ws. If they were still around, the A and C would be important to identify the ship type/tonnage, but since they're no longer around, "surface fleet" is enough information to deduce the vessel type from.

    • @Slagtheangry
      @Slagtheangry 2 месяца назад

      I'm not sure what I will ever do with this information, but thank you for sharing anyway.

  • @DepthWish
    @DepthWish 2 месяца назад +32

    "he was riddled with this ism" > solid wordplay in this one, well played.

    • @trixiecox6433
      @trixiecox6433 2 месяца назад +2

      Calling the 'tism "esoteric pattern recognition" absolutely sent me 🤣🤣🤣

  • @juliobalmaseda7527
    @juliobalmaseda7527 2 месяца назад

    The ceiling bird sound when he said "smoke detectors"😂

  • @sicboi99
    @sicboi99 3 месяца назад +37

    Nice beard

  • @dAnxiety69
    @dAnxiety69 3 месяца назад +16

    you can be Ethan Klien for Halloween

    • @NoLove0341
      @NoLove0341 2 месяца назад +2

      Damn dude…that’s just mean.

  • @gingersperg
    @gingersperg 3 месяца назад +8

    Whoever your editor is, who put in a faint beep when you referenced smoke detectors, give him a raise. I had to double take incase I was experiencing the Mandela effect

  • @knightrider585
    @knightrider585 2 месяца назад +1

    The smoke detector ping was gold! haha

  • @mikelthemafia
    @mikelthemafia 3 месяца назад +13

    Rest in peace david charles hahn, his smile was as radiating as that of a child from chernobyl.

  • @schneemil2185
    @schneemil2185 3 месяца назад +15

    you look like the uncle who barely ever shows up at any party, tries to make small talk with you, and start sharing about his failing marriage with you

  • @derpanzermacher9094
    @derpanzermacher9094 2 месяца назад +8

    "I'm genuinely very angry"- proceeds to chuckle, not even you can take yourself seriously with that baby face lmao

  • @utarefson9
    @utarefson9 2 месяца назад +7

    15:37 "But of course, that loophole has since then obviously been closed" - Typical boomer move, after they get to the top they just have to kick the ladder down behind them

  • @pookiegaming75
    @pookiegaming75 3 месяца назад +39

    You’re like a nuclear Boy Scout too dank
    Shaving your beard was one of the biggest disasters since Chernobyl

  • @GorrellFamilyRacing
    @GorrellFamilyRacing 3 месяца назад +7

    I completely understand the frustration. That’s why I quit trimming mine lol

  • @dragoninthewest1
    @dragoninthewest1 3 месяца назад +77

    Oh thank god, I'm not the only one who had to go back to zero with his beard this week

    • @GIBBO4182
      @GIBBO4182 3 месяца назад +10

      My barber apparently doesn’t understand what “medium” means and mine is shorter than it’s been for about 5 years right now as well!!

    • @chemistryofquestionablequa6252
      @chemistryofquestionablequa6252 3 месяца назад +5

      Are we a new club now?

    • @AutitsicDysexlia
      @AutitsicDysexlia 3 месяца назад

      ​@@chemistryofquestionablequa6252 I'm not joining.

    • @joecentral-o9984
      @joecentral-o9984 3 месяца назад

      I work in a kitchen. It's 1" or baby face.

    • @Sujjin21
      @Sujjin21 3 месяца назад +2

      I had to do the same about 6 months ago. It was awful

  • @Enochkers
    @Enochkers 29 дней назад

    The beep during "smoke detectors" is hilarious

  • @theviperiscalling
    @theviperiscalling 3 месяца назад +12

    yeah i woulda bailed out on a sponsorship too 💀

  • @Waauugh
    @Waauugh 2 месяца назад +11

    Dank looks like that cool uncle with the quads that he lets his nephews ride. And laughs while the mother runs after them in a hysterical panic.

  • @huntervelicky7502
    @huntervelicky7502 2 месяца назад +57

    Me: very depressed, lost my job, gonna get evicted, all hope is lost
    But then I see a new Dankula video is up
    Okay it isn't all that bad

    • @ratkingzs
      @ratkingzs 2 месяца назад +12

      Hope everything work out brother

    • @anecdotalpreacher3047
      @anecdotalpreacher3047 2 месяца назад +4

      Sucks to hear man, I’m jobless aswell but I am thankful that I saved up enough to sustain myself for a bit, I hope things get better for you in the future.

    • @angrymetalhead
      @angrymetalhead 2 месяца назад +1

      Keep on keepin' on mate, you got this.

  • @Retro.LabRat
    @Retro.LabRat Месяц назад +1

    Oh look, an ALDI Johnny Vegas 😂