I'm 1 year and 5 months today. 47 now, been a binge drinker for 25 years, Glad I stopped. Miss the social side but the 80% of the rest I don't miss. Serves me no purpose. Sleep crap, next day written off, day after that day still sluggish. On and on. My health and mental health are 100 times better.
Quality mate enjoyed the video. I was sober for nearly 2 years & I went to vegas last month and done the same thing kinda. I thought I can’t come to Vegas & not drink!?! So I did. And after that I thought I could drink at special occasions. Had a drink at a wedding last week & seriously regretted it. Came to the realisation zero is the best amount for me. Well done on controlling yourself to just the few ports mate & enjoying time with your mates. I’m more once I have one drink I want ten! So I’ve decided after last week I’m just not a drinker.
I quit for 21 months and came back to drinking 3 weeks ago. I blew through all my ground rules the first week, and had 15 beers last night. Back to Day 1. Lesson learned!!!
Have been alcohol free since 29th January 2024. Best thing I ever did. I liken drinking to a rollercoast, the highs are brief but the lows are terrifying. Now I'm on a level ride or road The bumps are minimal and easily ridden Stay strong, wherever your journey takes you
Some people hate it when someone is dieting, exercising, giving up drugs or drink. It reminds them of things they should probably also give up on for the sake of better health or mental wellbeing. Anyone who treats you funny coz you are sober or wanting to get sober is someone you don’t want in your inner circle. When I got to 30 the full weekend hangover was just awful and not worth the hassle any more. I haven’t had a hangover for over 12 years and it’s the best thing ever.
I still get it now after 16 years of no alcohol, when i say i was an alcoholic and told them what i drank they always, always try and make you feel like c--p. But yet happy to get drunk as a lord in front of you. Then its i drink this and that and im ok, when you say well i was drinking a bottle of scotch, and or brandy a day they don't believe you, grates me to no end.
You seem like a great guy with a great bunch of friends. Very refreshing to hear someone who gives their opinion with empathy and pragmatism. Fair play to ya Steve and keep up them lads trips away! Respect.
Getting sober is all about discovering the person you’ve always been we just hold back out of fear of not being accepted. We need to feel all our emotions to stop suppressing. Suppressing emotions and feelings leads to depression. We need to face what we fear most and become uncomfortable. When we don’t have a loud voice doubting us anymore we start to learn that the person we are when we drink and do drugs is the true person we are. Just no longer having our mind be chaotic so we can be ourselves. We need to learn to be face our fears of rejection and speak up for ourselves.
I enjoyed a couple drinks last nights after months of not drinking and thoroughly enjoyed it. I think by not having had a drink in a long time I was able to fully appreciate it. That's me done now for another year or so though.
I’m on day 23, kicked out of school , kicked out of college , kicked out of university , kicked out from my parents, can’t keep a hobby longer than a few weeks , can’t keep a job longer than a month. Been sober now and I just seem … different. Scared to say it’s my final drink as I’m not sure as of yet , but changing the relationship with alcohol is something certain. Your videos are honest and straight forward . I love the idea of having drinks on special occasions, but I also don’t want to ruin the “streak” , maybe feel like I’ve let my self down…. But I do love a good beer or whisky .
I'm 22 and I've struggled with alcoholism for about 7-8 years now, I'm getting to the end of line now and think I'm ready to leave it behind. My father was an alcoholic and stopped drinking when I was a child. I was speaking to him about my desire to become sober and my reservations with it, such as missing out on special occasions and losing my social life. He told me very clearly that the percentage of alcoholics that learn to control their drinking for the rest of their lives is so small that it'd be pointless to try, the only real option is to leave it behind completely and start living your life.
I can relate to your experience and approach. I am 195 days alcohol free today, minus a handful of moments ; when my daughter graduated college after a emotionally challenging time, I shared in the bottle of wine at a celebration lunch. Another time I had family from far away visiting and many spectacular wines were opened. I probably had 2 glasses total that night. Each time I enjoyed myself thoroughly, but then I went immediately back to alcohol free beer and wine. And as time moves on Im less and less triggered to 'taste' even tho its literally just touching my lips. Because I wasn't physically addicted, just a strong lifestyle habit, the more I break associations the easier it gets. I'm looking forward to my one year mark! And then two years and three years... One thing I recently noted six months into this my baseline brain chemistry happiness has elevated so slightly but noticeably 😊 it's a welcome change
I went to the Dordogne, France and broke my sobriety. It felt right to have a glass of local wine in a sun drenched square. I enjoyed it at the time but regretted it later. I'm back on track I'm glad to say. I went to allen Carr's first clinic at his home in Wimbledon to stop smoking, it worked and have since read his book to stop drinking.
Youre so articulate and these video journals are very helpful! I have been sober 6 months and the lonliness and sadness are overwhelming many days. But I keep going because I know the lows of drunk me ar much worse.
I did 15yrs sober after a big problem with it. Started again 2yrs ago and it's caused me some grief, although had some good times, so im going sober again, 10 days in. I don't think life is black and white and I've learned a lot about myself and what makes me tick. Good luck people, take care of yourselves.
I will be 3 years dry on NYD next year. I gave up to get fitter and recover better for running and to reset my relationship with alcohol. I honestly do not know what I would do if I was confronted with a situation like your one. Part of me wouldn't want to miss out but part of me does not want to ever reset to zero.
I actually stopped smoking after reading Alan Carr's Easyway to stop smoking book. I later read the stop drinking version but it didn't have the same impact, but that was possibly because I wasn't ready to stop at the time. Think I may buy it again for when the day comes that I'm ready to quit. Great video, very honest and helpful.
Really good video Steve. It is 2 months since I have had a drink. I was initially planning to take 3 months off but after gaining so many benefits, I think I will continue with abstenince.
I read Annie Grace’s book, who was influenced greatly by Carr. I drink when I want which is almost never. Since I stopped 11 months ago I’ve drank just a a half a dozen times and three of those were one drink. The other 3 were more like 3-5 drinks. I rarely want to anymore but this is what I wanted to say: I don’t miss or crave alcohol at all until I have even one drink. Then it’s almost a lock for the next two weekends I’ll almost justify drinking but I made a rule if I drink I take a minimum of 15 days off before another. After those 15 days the booze is out of my system completely and I have zero cravings what so ever. But that addictive poison screams for more when you consume it again. It’s crazy what a single drink will do to make you crave more for 10-15 days after.
Yeah this is exactly my experience too. That’s how it’s gotten out of hand in my experience. It’s just easier to not drink at all. When I haven’t made the decision to just abstain completely in the past, I’d do real mental gymnastics to justify drinking. It felt like a compulsion and something I had to do almost. Once I’ve decided it’s just not something I’m doing at all, the exhausting back and forth isn’t something I have to deal with at all. It’s a lot more peaceful and simple.
@@NinjaOutfitInTheWash if you’re like me you’ve got a few gold medals in mental gymnastics in the past. Dipping my toe into moderation here and there has not seemed worth it to me cause it un-retires that mental gymnastic champion in my head for a couple weeks.
@@NinjaOutfitInTheWash Yeah, I have been off alcohol for nearly seven years and I favour 'easier not to drink at all'. I do miss not being able to get pissed now and then, though.🤣
I’m an ex addict myself. I’ve had lengthy enough periods of total abstinence and then “gave myself permission” to use a “less” harmful substance. And yes you know it caused me issues. I’m so so much happier now that I do stay away from stuff that’s not in line for my higher good. We don’t need drugs or alcohol to enjoy our lives or have fun.the fun really does begin once you take your power back from substances . Alcohol or other substances actually poison the brain 🙄
998 days AF- never, ever felt better, both mentally and physically! Looking forward to celebrating 1000 days over the weekend with my favourite AF beer and a big rib eye!
@@cgoody9913 Good morning. I stayed clear of ALL AF product for the first two years of my sobriety. Not because I was worried about it being a trigger, but more so because I just didn’t understand the point behind drinking AF products and consuming empty calories. That said, my son graduated law school this past spring and while at that event, I wanted to “celebrate” his accomplishments with him so I tried a Heineken 0% and actually enjoyed the taste. Since then, I have the odd AF beer when grilling or on super hot days on the back deck. It’s a nice change from sparkling water and I’ve enjoyed trying different brands, i.e. Sober Carpenter, Clausthaler, etc.. My alcohol love affair was with red wine. I was never a big beer drinker, but have found the AF products to be a nice compliment to my summer beverage choices.
When I was in the military I had a chance to have a Guinness in Ireland also but I was focused on fitness goals and decided not to drink. It’s one regret I have is not having a Guinness where it’s made.
I went from drinking every weekend to quitting for a few years when covid happened, I couldn't go out anyway and I never drink at home so it was fairly easy. now I'm at the point where I can have a 3 or 4 lash ups a year, weddings or special occasions, works for me
Fair enough about the port. Doesn’t seem to have done your progress any real harm. I went off drink 5 years ago and, to be honest, I just don’t want a drink anymore. I enjoy a nice coffee or even a soft drink. I’d actually enjoy a nice cool glass of water more than booze now. It’s all in our minds I guess. Each to their own, everyone should enjoy drinking/not drinking as they choose. It’s all good 😊
I have only managed to do 4 days and I felt so much better. Had some drinks today and it has made me feel like shit. Now I know that I am giving it up. Absolutely drained away my energy.
Really good videos mate. I've done a year before myself and am currently 8 weeks on the sober journey. I really like your openess and honesty. Respect.
Great insights in this video, thank you. I'm almost 1 year 8 months alcohol free and have often thought about this, if I were overseas at a special place I've wanted to visit for a long time would I have the 'special' beer in the moment type thing. I think I would consider it, but thinking about resetting my quitting counter I wouldn't be able to. Much respect to you for having the self control to enjoy those unique/ special moments and then return to being alcohol free. More on the spiritual side, if you're interested check the relation to alcohol use and 'spirits', fascinating topic to dive into.
My biggest battle with drinking is that all my best stories start with, "we were down the pub and..." If I don't drink, I don't go out and socialise. I've tried to ask mates to do non drinking social activities but they're often reluctant because of the cost of some event, but don't mind spending £100+ on booze, food and transport 😂
Done 8 years now it's easy to be honest couldn't imagine going back to day one be strong and don't look for excuses to re start your a better person for it 👍👍🏴🏴🦊
I *quit* drinking nearly 4 months ago, I emphasise the quit as it wasnt like I made a consious decision never to drink again I just thought i'm not drinking again until I do. I wouldn't consider myself an alcoholic or anything like that but I was a pretty consistent 3 day a week drinker with a good 6 beers each session so it was bad enough. I have had a drink since on my wedding anniversary but when you see the benefits of not drinking it's so much easier not letting that be a crux again. I'm happy with the thought of having a special occasion drink like anniversary or holiday. Good luck to anyone else who's trying their best 👌
Probably a year or so after I quit, I told myself that if I ever made it to Spain I would give in for that special occasion. I used to absolutely go nuts over Spanish red wines and very much romanticized it. But now - I don't trust myself to keep it to that one occasion and that "delicious glass of wine" was never as tasty as sobriety has been. Plus I discovered this huge culture of tea that gives me everything I loved about wine. 😂😂 Now I dream of taking trips to tea estates and visiting tea growers and eating gourmet meals with tea pairings...
@@1987jugernaut I actually am lucky enough to live close to a fabulous Chinese tea shop called Seven Cups. They actually did a wulong tea tasting the other weekend that was a nice parallel to the wine tastings I used to love. Drinking a tasty dan cong wulong today. My favorite is actually a black tea from them called Drunken Peach (or zui qun fang). Full without being astringent and has a deep malty sweetness to it that I love. Kinda funny that my fav has the word "drunk" in the name though... 😂 I also do love Taiwanese oolongs and keep going back to a milk and honey oolong from Floating Leaves in Seattle.
First (drinks) wines of the year last week on a flight with very good NZ and French wines. It was my birthday. I enjoyed but have no intention or temptation to have other drinks this year. So it was an eye opening "experiment".
Its good to hear a perspective like this, Alcohol isnt for everyone and I dont think that every social interaction has to revolve around it. Im lucky in the sense that the amount I want to drink is never a problem. Dont giggle and shit.
For me it's about subtition rather than quitting alcohol. The zero alcohol beers have come along way and a cold one still hits the spot. It must be something about approaching 50 as some of my friends have cut down alot recently.
My 2 cents. If i was not drinking I probably would not have any desire to go to the Champagne. Or visit a Whisky distillery. I dont eat meat. So no point in visiting some organic animal farm. I would choose different places to go.
I appreciate the data. I was going to read The unexpected joy of being sober book a few years back, but didn’t purchase it until today. Thank you for this video and book reminder
You asked for comments. 45 yrs of drinking, and I quit for 240 days, quit sugar, carbs, processed foods too, and ramped up my running and other exercise. Felt 30 yrs younger. Drink only when I really want to, and only when I'm with great friends and it's a special occassion- which is maybe 3-4 times a year, and never more than 2 drinks in a night. Drink so much less, enjoy it so much more. Would definitely have a champagne in Champagne. Enjoy life too. Trust your instincts. You sound like you have a great head on your shoulders.
Used to be a six pack a day dude for 20 years and cut it back to a 6 pack a week dude over the past 7 months. I honestly don’t notice much difference except for the weight gain. I munch a heck of a lot more!
18 months is a very common for coming off the wagon including myself but I’ve been better than moderate since I went back . I personally believe in controlled and spaced out drinking on special occasions but only after a prolonged period of mental sobriety and reset as apposed to the stress of all or nothing .
I like your story Steve. Yes, you should have had the port. It just affirmed that you really don't want to drink. I am glad that you were able to enjoy it. I hope to drink like that in the future but I am thinking I just want to be done with thinking about alcohol and maybe it is time to quit. I am 3 weeks without alcohol and was going to do a 30 day challenge but I will probably just keep going. Last year I did Sober October and continued on through November and then started drinking again. I am really concerned about my husband's drinking and I feel like I really can't say anything about it if I am still drinking with him. But that is a journey he has to take and mine is separate from his. Keep up the good work in knowing what you want.
Yep...Steve's still romancing (the sophistication of) beer, wine, and spirits. And so am I. It's been culturally and biologically ingrained in me since pre-birth.
Hey Steve, it’s crazy because after getting the WHOOP, I also gave up drinking. Because of the data that I was seeing on my recoveries after I would have a night of drinking. But I actually recently had to start again, because my resting heart rate was getting too low after not drinking. it was dropping below 40 bpm while I was sleeping and I kept getting warnings about it. So now I’m back to drinking just a few drinks a week and hoping that that will raise my resting heart rate enough that I won’t get those warnings anymore.
Hey it's none of my business obviously but if I were to see low HR during sleep (which is generally quite normal in healthy people) I wouldn't move to doing something very unhealthy to "correct" the low overnight HR. I would see a Dr and see what they say, there could be another cause you're not aware of or it could be nothing to worry about and you're now drinking for no reason. Or your HR is not being picked up by your device correctly for whatever reason... 😊
@@chrischild3667I am seeing my doctor next week! But I saw a clear drop in RHR after quitting. I don’t drink that much. Maybe 3 per week so at such a low dose, if it means I’m not feeling light headed, I’m willing to do it! But we will see what my doctor says!
I stopped drinking Whiskey and Brandy 16 years ago, Cigarettes also, Alcohol was easier than smoking. I had such a scare from drink by my Doctor it frightened me half to death. I still have an occasional pang for both but know it would be to my demise. Its a wicked game and i knew all the time as i am a healthcare professional. Its addiction and when you are an adult and don't require permission to go to the shops its just too easy.
11:50 -> that's what I actually did before quitting drinking: I went to the Champagne region for a long weekend, did some tours at Champagne houses, visited a champagne grower. Sort of as a goodbye trip to alcohol. Same thing I would probably do when visiting Scotland (already visited Porto, the ports under the bridge were nice). But to plan an entire holiday around alcohol seems far too excessive now.
After 30 years of problem drinking, I stopped drinking for nearly 11 months. Felt stressed and depressed that whole time, unable to relax. My counsellor suggested I had ADHD, which confirmed my suspicions. I was on an immediate high as things starting to make sense... Decided I was fixed, decided it was safe to drink again. 2 months later I've been drinking almost daily. So lesson 1: if repeated attempts to cut down or reset fail, you have Alcohol Use Disorder. Lesson 2: you've probably also got underlying mental health issues or ADHD. Treat those too. Lesson 3: alcohol withdrawal can last months or years
For me 20 years older. I was a wine sipper, homemade every day, secret drink alone type drinker, and big tolerance never drunk, surprise my liver signalled to my doctor to tell me i had to stop. For 2 years ive been mostly stopped, then that stage 3 brain telling me, well you deserve one, lets go, but truth is my body has maxed out its tolerance for alcohol, there is no margin for error, no trips to Champagne or Porto ville.
Very Interesting - Thanks !!!!!!!! Its absolutely etched in our DNA (Brits) go thew football, Beer, Go to a Birthday, Beer, Wedding, Booze Up, Funeral, Booze Up, Xmas - Boozy! Holiday Abroad - All Inclusive drink as much as you can (i have many times) the thought of going for an Indian (which is one of my long time hobbys) without having a few Cold Cobras or Kingfishers is !!!!!!!!!! we / i need wiping & re programming !!!!!! Thanks Again Steve! Ive ordered that 1st book!
Really interesting and very thought-provoking, Steve. Good for you. Did you make a mistake (in drinking those ports)? At some point in the future, I guess you'll know the answer to that. Couldn't be more impressed, Steve. Total respect. 👍🤗
Read or listen to Alcohol explained. You are causing yourself completely unnecessary turmoil by wondering when your next drink will be. Seriously, get the book on audible and listen to it all and see how you feel afterwards.
@andyb311 Yeah I'm my own worst enemy, always have been. I have a 10 day all inclusive holiday early 2025 and that's another thing that's driving my mind crazy as it would be my first ever time abroad alcohol free (providing I last that long) 😖
@@paulmulks I know the feeling mate I really do. I can't recommend the book more for someone in your position though. It's the only thing that really made it click in my mind. Give it a try!!
I feel somewhat shielded from the temptation of the connoisseur as I only drank rum and cokes for years. Like, maybe if I’m ever on the pirate ship ride at disney? I will, however, still have an occasional coke with sushi or pizza.
Last drink was NYE 2023. I'm not going to lie, I do miss it 😢. I want to drink in moderation again, similar to how it was described in this video, but I don't know if I can hold back after starting 😢 So I just don't do it at all.
Read the book The Naked Mind. Annie Grace. She was influenced by Alan Carr, mentioned in this video. I don’t miss it at all after that book. I hate it. It’s like a toxic ex I got rid of and am grateful every day that bitch named booze is out of my life. You won’t miss it anymore. You will be excited for life without booze.
The hard fact is all addiction is easy to over come but heroin. The only issue is you. Change your perception and anything is easy to over come. Ive over come alcholism, a wild drug addiction inc a daily LSD addiction. Ive taken everything but heroin, lay in a pool of my own blood more times than i can remember. I took so many drugs one night, i died and revived in hospital. All my exits have been quick. Next day cold turkey. Other than my smoking addiction i got going on now. Im testing the waters to see how it goes over cold turkey. Its surprisingly going well. I dont think i could of done this a year ago. Gone fron 1-2 an hour to 1-2 a day. I'll be down to 0 next week. God speed to anyone beating addiction. You can do it, i got faith in you.
can't figure out why sound is not working. I wanted to support your video. No, I don't drink, can't stand how it makes me feel. I don't like the flavors. I wish you all the best and wish I could have heard what you have to say. I don't like to be around drunks.
You cannot be a Temporary Sober Person. The reason is you still believe that Alcohol is a benefit to you in some way. This is a drug and the way drugs work is you get addicted quite quickly. Once you make a commitment to stop and you are able to stop you should be able to embrace sobriety and make it your identity. 18 months is quite a time when you fall off the wagon. With me I have been sober for 4 years now and i never get tempted or associate with the substance. I have the identity of a non drinker now and I love this feeling.
The thing with saying I am quitting forever is that put"s so much pressure on you and you are sort of white nuckling sobriety. What you need to do is just take it one day at a time and not count day's that you are sober. It is like Life. We should not dwell on the past because that is gone, it is history. We should not try to forecast the future, as this is impossible, what we can do is live in this moment.
@@dipakrawal1509 I hate alcohol and all it took from me when I chose to have it part of my life. I get the one day at a time thing, but for me it’s for the eat of my life. Not “I can’t have it”….. but more of a “fuck alcohol” position.
I’m interested in trying to reset alcohol tolerance.. did you find that after 18 months not drinking that when you had the port it hit you hard? Or did you have much the same tolerance as before to it? Thanks
You have to be sober 100% of the time if you are an alcoholic. Having a drink in a specific region sounds a slippery slope. What next Scotland = Whiskey. Russia = vodka. Rum = Jamaica ?
I'm 1 year and 5 months today. 47 now, been a binge drinker for 25 years, Glad I stopped. Miss the social side but the 80% of the rest I don't miss. Serves me no purpose. Sleep crap, next day written off, day after that day still sluggish. On and on. My health and mental health are 100 times better.
Well done fantastic
Same. 47. Same.
Keep going fella. 16 years for me now.
Quality mate enjoyed the video. I was sober for nearly 2 years & I went to vegas last month and done the same thing kinda. I thought I can’t come to Vegas & not drink!?! So I did. And after that I thought I could drink at special occasions. Had a drink at a wedding last week & seriously regretted it. Came to the realisation zero is the best amount for me.
Well done on controlling yourself to just the few ports mate & enjoying time with your mates. I’m more once I have one drink I want ten! So I’ve decided after last week I’m just not a drinker.
This completely resonates with me, went back to drinking after three years and regretted it almost immediately, a big learn.
Hoping you didn't beat yourself up about it, mate. I've been there, so not going to offer anything you don't already know. Keep well. 💪
Same
I quit for 21 months and came back to drinking 3 weeks ago. I blew through all my ground rules the first week, and had 15 beers last night. Back to Day 1. Lesson learned!!!
Hi yeah me too on Sunday after 3 months had a load of beers; next day swollen belly felt like crap...start again. Lesson learned
Have been alcohol free since 29th January 2024.
Best thing I ever did.
I liken drinking to a rollercoast, the highs are brief but the lows are terrifying.
Now I'm on a level ride or road
The bumps are minimal and easily ridden
Stay strong, wherever your journey takes you
Some people hate it when someone is dieting, exercising, giving up drugs or drink. It reminds them of things they should probably also give up on for the sake of better health or mental wellbeing. Anyone who treats you funny coz you are sober or wanting to get sober is someone you don’t want in your inner circle. When I got to 30 the full weekend hangover was just awful and not worth the hassle any more. I haven’t had a hangover for over 12 years and it’s the best thing ever.
I still get it now after 16 years of no alcohol, when i say i was an alcoholic and told them what i drank they always, always try and make you feel like c--p. But yet happy to get drunk as a lord in front of you. Then its i drink this and that and im ok, when you say well i was drinking a bottle of scotch, and or brandy a day they don't believe you, grates me to no end.
You seem like a great guy with a great bunch of friends. Very refreshing to hear someone who gives their opinion with empathy and pragmatism. Fair play to ya Steve and keep up them lads trips away! Respect.
Thank you!
Getting sober is all about discovering the person you’ve always been we just hold back out of fear of not being accepted. We need to feel all our emotions to stop suppressing. Suppressing emotions and feelings leads to depression. We need to face what we fear most and become uncomfortable. When we don’t have a loud voice doubting us anymore we start to learn that the person we are when we drink and do drugs is the true person we are. Just no longer having our mind be chaotic so we can be ourselves. We need to learn to be face our fears of rejection and speak up for ourselves.
I 💯 percent can relate with everything you said. Im turning 51 and I just cant deal with the hangover anymore
I’m 14 years. Heard lots of the sayings along the way but never heard I’ve not given up anything etc. Thanks for those wise words
I enjoyed a couple drinks last nights after months of not drinking and thoroughly enjoyed it. I think by not having had a drink in a long time I was able to fully appreciate it. That's me done now for another year or so though.
I’m on day 23, kicked out of school , kicked out of college , kicked out of university , kicked out from my parents, can’t keep a hobby longer than a few weeks , can’t keep a job longer than a month.
Been sober now and I just seem … different.
Scared to say it’s my final drink as I’m not sure as of yet , but changing the relationship with alcohol is something certain.
Your videos are honest and straight forward .
I love the idea of having drinks on special occasions, but I also don’t want to ruin the “streak” , maybe feel like I’ve let my self down…. But I do love a good beer or whisky .
I'm 22 and I've struggled with alcoholism for about 7-8 years now, I'm getting to the end of line now and think I'm ready to leave it behind. My father was an alcoholic and stopped drinking when I was a child. I was speaking to him about my desire to become sober and my reservations with it, such as missing out on special occasions and losing my social life. He told me very clearly that the percentage of alcoholics that learn to control their drinking for the rest of their lives is so small that it'd be pointless to try, the only real option is to leave it behind completely and start living your life.
@@avertismentguy62 Hope you and your Dad are doing well :)
I can relate to your experience and approach.
I am 195 days alcohol free today, minus a handful of moments ; when my daughter graduated college after a emotionally challenging time, I shared in the bottle of wine at a celebration lunch.
Another time I had family from far away visiting and many spectacular wines were opened. I probably had 2 glasses total that night.
Each time I enjoyed myself thoroughly, but then I went immediately back to alcohol free beer and wine. And as time moves on Im less and less triggered to 'taste' even tho its literally just touching my lips.
Because I wasn't physically addicted, just a strong lifestyle habit, the more I break associations the easier it gets. I'm looking forward to my one year mark! And then two years and three years...
One thing I recently noted six months into this my baseline brain chemistry happiness has elevated so slightly but noticeably 😊 it's a welcome change
I read David Carr book, I was ready to stop drinking! 7 months sober! I’m a better person.
I went to the Dordogne, France and broke my sobriety. It felt right to have a glass of local wine in a sun drenched square. I enjoyed it at the time but regretted it later. I'm back on track I'm glad to say. I went to allen Carr's first clinic at his home in Wimbledon to stop smoking, it worked and have since read his book to stop drinking.
Yep Allen Carr's book worked for me too! So simple yet I had never thought of it this way before. Its a gain not a loss to stop drinking.
I'm 52 and am totally tuned in to your message. I'm on day 40 AF and not sure if that's final, but enjoying the discipline of the process.
Youre so articulate and these video journals are very helpful! I have been sober 6 months and the lonliness and sadness are overwhelming many days. But I keep going because I know the lows of drunk me ar much worse.
@@princesskenny5270 i can relate to those feelings occasionally. How are you doing today?
I did 15yrs sober after a big problem with it. Started again 2yrs ago and it's caused me some grief, although had some good times, so im going sober again, 10 days in. I don't think life is black and white and I've learned a lot about myself and what makes me tick. Good luck people, take care of yourselves.
❤️
I will be 3 years dry on NYD next year. I gave up to get fitter and recover better for running and to reset my relationship with alcohol. I honestly do not know what I would do if I was confronted with a situation like your one. Part of me wouldn't want to miss out but part of me does not want to ever reset to zero.
Your alcohol experience/habits are very similar to mine. Been sober for nearly 6 years. Toughest time was being sober in New Orleans.
I actually stopped smoking after reading Alan Carr's Easyway to stop smoking book.
I later read the stop drinking version but it didn't have the same impact, but that was possibly because I wasn't ready to stop at the time. Think I may buy it again for when the day comes that I'm ready to quit. Great video, very honest and helpful.
Really good video Steve. It is 2 months since I have had a drink. I was initially planning to take 3 months off but after gaining so many benefits, I think I will continue with abstenince.
Drinking Is no fun anymore
Good video. The sleep recovery aspect is telling. And this kind of reflection is a huge part of finding the right balance.
I read Annie Grace’s book, who was influenced greatly by Carr. I drink when I want which is almost never. Since I stopped 11 months ago I’ve drank just a a half a dozen times and three of those were one drink. The other 3 were more like 3-5 drinks. I rarely want to anymore but this is what I wanted to say: I don’t miss or crave alcohol at all until I have even one drink. Then it’s almost a lock for the next two weekends I’ll almost justify drinking but I made a rule if I drink I take a minimum of 15 days off before another. After those 15 days the booze is out of my system completely and I have zero cravings what so ever. But that addictive poison screams for more when you consume it again. It’s crazy what a single drink will do to make you crave more for 10-15 days after.
Yeah this is exactly my experience too. That’s how it’s gotten out of hand in my experience. It’s just easier to not drink at all. When I haven’t made the decision to just abstain completely in the past, I’d do real mental gymnastics to justify drinking. It felt like a compulsion and something I had to do almost. Once I’ve decided it’s just not something I’m doing at all, the exhausting back and forth isn’t something I have to deal with at all. It’s a lot more peaceful and simple.
@@NinjaOutfitInTheWash if you’re like me you’ve got a few gold medals in mental gymnastics in the past. Dipping my toe into moderation here and there has not seemed worth it to me cause it un-retires that mental gymnastic champion in my head for a couple weeks.
Thats a great way of explaining what happens! @davesage4931
@@NinjaOutfitInTheWash Yeah, I have been off alcohol for nearly seven years and I favour 'easier not to drink at all'. I do miss not being able to get pissed now and then, though.🤣
@@johnkerr7286 As a 41 year old dude who''s been sober 2 out of the last 5+ years, I applaud you and find you an Inspiration :P
I’m an ex addict myself.
I’ve had lengthy enough periods of total abstinence and then “gave myself permission” to use a “less” harmful substance.
And yes you know it caused me issues.
I’m so so much happier now that I do stay away from stuff that’s not in line for my higher good.
We don’t need drugs or alcohol to enjoy our lives or have fun.the fun really does begin once you take your power back from substances .
Alcohol or other substances actually poison the brain 🙄
998 days AF- never, ever felt better, both mentally and physically! Looking forward to celebrating 1000 days over the weekend with my favourite AF beer and a big rib eye!
Hope you had a good 1000 bro !
@@Oleogustus I did, Thank you!
Honest question, how much AF beer do you drink. Like as much booze as you usually did?
@@cgoody9913 Good morning. I stayed clear of ALL AF product for the first two years of my sobriety. Not because I was worried about it being a trigger, but more so because I just didn’t understand the point behind drinking AF products and consuming empty calories. That said, my son graduated law school this past spring and while at that event, I wanted to “celebrate” his accomplishments with him so I tried a Heineken 0% and actually enjoyed the taste. Since then, I have the odd AF beer when grilling or on super hot days on the back deck. It’s a nice change from sparkling water and I’ve enjoyed trying different brands, i.e. Sober Carpenter, Clausthaler, etc.. My alcohol love affair was with red wine. I was never a big beer drinker, but have found the AF products to be a nice compliment to my summer beverage choices.
@@cgoody9913 you won’t get that insatiable desire because there’s no alcohol. You will probably have the same amount of soda or anything like that.
When I was in the military I had a chance to have a Guinness in Ireland also but I was focused on fitness goals and decided not to drink. It’s one regret I have is not having a Guinness where it’s made.
At age 71 I decided to stop poisoning my body, and mind.
I wanted to be the best I could be. So giving up was really easy.
WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER. SMART. YOUR DAYS ARE YOURS NOW. NOT THE BOTTLES
Zzzzzz
@@bobravenscraft5376
Too thick to care.
@@bobravenscraft5376
Does your carer know you are on line unsupervised?
Get them champ
I went from drinking every weekend to quitting for a few years when covid happened, I couldn't go out anyway and I never drink at home so it was fairly easy. now I'm at the point where I can have a 3 or 4 lash ups a year, weddings or special occasions, works for me
Fair enough about the port. Doesn’t seem to have done your progress any real harm. I went off drink 5 years ago and, to be honest, I just don’t want a drink anymore. I enjoy a nice coffee or even a soft drink. I’d actually enjoy a nice cool glass of water more than booze now. It’s all in our minds I guess. Each to their own, everyone should enjoy drinking/not drinking as they choose. It’s all good 😊
I have only managed to do 4 days and I felt so much better. Had some drinks today and it has made me feel like shit. Now I know that I am giving it up. Absolutely drained away my energy.
Really good videos mate.
I've done a year before myself and am currently 8 weeks on the sober journey.
I really like your openess and honesty.
Respect.
Really interesting! Thanks for sharing your story. I would have wanted to have that Bellini in Venice though too, no doubt.
Great insights in this video, thank you. I'm almost 1 year 8 months alcohol free and have often thought about this, if I were overseas at a special place I've wanted to visit for a long time would I have the 'special' beer in the moment type thing. I think I would consider it, but thinking about resetting my quitting counter I wouldn't be able to. Much respect to you for having the self control to enjoy those unique/ special moments and then return to being alcohol free. More on the spiritual side, if you're interested check the relation to alcohol use and 'spirits', fascinating topic to dive into.
Always great watching your videos Steve!
My biggest battle with drinking is that all my best stories start with, "we were down the pub and..."
If I don't drink, I don't go out and socialise. I've tried to ask mates to do non drinking social activities but they're often reluctant because of the cost of some event, but don't mind spending £100+ on booze, food and transport 😂
I’m just so glad I found your channel, Steve. Please keep going. ❤
Thank you, I will
Done 8 years now it's easy to be honest couldn't imagine going back to day one be strong and don't look for excuses to re start your a better person for it 👍👍🏴🏴🦊
What a great, honest video mate, well done man
I *quit* drinking nearly 4 months ago, I emphasise the quit as it wasnt like I made a consious decision never to drink again I just thought i'm not drinking again until I do. I wouldn't consider myself an alcoholic or anything like that but I was a pretty consistent 3 day a week drinker with a good 6 beers each session so it was bad enough. I have had a drink since on my wedding anniversary but when you see the benefits of not drinking it's so much easier not letting that be a crux again. I'm happy with the thought of having a special occasion drink like anniversary or holiday. Good luck to anyone else who's trying their best 👌
Probably a year or so after I quit, I told myself that if I ever made it to Spain I would give in for that special occasion. I used to absolutely go nuts over Spanish red wines and very much romanticized it. But now - I don't trust myself to keep it to that one occasion and that "delicious glass of wine" was never as tasty as sobriety has been. Plus I discovered this huge culture of tea that gives me everything I loved about wine. 😂😂 Now I dream of taking trips to tea estates and visiting tea growers and eating gourmet meals with tea pairings...
What’s your favourite tea? Please don’t say pg tips
@@1987jugernaut I actually am lucky enough to live close to a fabulous Chinese tea shop called Seven Cups. They actually did a wulong tea tasting the other weekend that was a nice parallel to the wine tastings I used to love. Drinking a tasty dan cong wulong today. My favorite is actually a black tea from them called Drunken Peach (or zui qun fang). Full without being astringent and has a deep malty sweetness to it that I love. Kinda funny that my fav has the word "drunk" in the name though... 😂 I also do love Taiwanese oolongs and keep going back to a milk and honey oolong from Floating Leaves in Seattle.
First (drinks) wines of the year last week on a flight with very good NZ and French wines. It was my birthday. I enjoyed but have no intention or temptation to have other drinks this year. So it was an eye opening "experiment".
Its good to hear a perspective like this, Alcohol isnt for everyone and I dont think that every social interaction has to revolve around it. Im lucky in the sense that the amount I want to drink is never a problem. Dont giggle and shit.
I love the line
I haven’t given up drinking
I have gained more things
Thanks for sharing. Would be very interested to hear more about this when you've had more time to reflect.
For me it's about subtition rather than quitting alcohol. The zero alcohol beers have come along way and a cold one still hits the spot. It must be something about approaching 50 as some of my friends have cut down alot recently.
I have false addiction to zero alcohol or .5 alcohol beer. Its pathetic how i need to drink 4 or 5 of them!
My 2 cents. If i was not drinking I probably would not have any desire to go to the Champagne. Or visit a Whisky distillery. I dont eat meat. So no point in visiting some organic animal farm. I would choose different places to go.
That example makes no sense. No one goes to an animal farm to eat. “No point in going to a steakhouse or a deli” would’ve made sense.
I appreciate the data. I was going to read The unexpected joy of being sober book a few years back, but didn’t purchase it until today. Thank you for this video and book reminder
Glad it was helpful!
I went back drinking last year after 4 years im 8 months sober again now
What triggered you and made you relapse?
You asked for comments. 45 yrs of drinking, and I quit for 240 days, quit sugar, carbs, processed foods too, and ramped up my running and other exercise. Felt 30 yrs younger. Drink only when I really want to, and only when I'm with great friends and it's a special occassion- which is maybe 3-4 times a year, and never more than 2 drinks in a night. Drink so much less, enjoy it so much more. Would definitely have a champagne in Champagne. Enjoy life too. Trust your instincts. You sound like you have a great head on your shoulders.
Amazing! Thanks for sharing.
Used to be a six pack a day dude for 20 years and cut it back to a 6 pack a week dude over the past 7 months. I honestly don’t notice much difference except for the weight gain. I munch a heck of a lot more!
17 weeks in I broke my sobriety on holiday thinking I'll just have one..big mistake, gutted isn't the word. Starting day 1 today
Goodluck mate, its not about failing but about getting back on track. Nice one recovering like that!
@onthewall425 thank you
Day 2 .. honest video much appreciated.. thanks
18 months is a very common for coming off the wagon including myself but I’ve been better than moderate since I went back . I personally believe in controlled and spaced out drinking on special occasions but only after a prolonged period of mental sobriety and reset as apposed to the stress of all or nothing .
Great vid, thank you. My only disagreement is Catherine Grey’s book which I found to be a self-indulgent, name dropping autobiography.
I like your story Steve. Yes, you should have had the port. It just affirmed that you really don't want to drink. I am glad that you were able to enjoy it. I hope to drink like that in the future but I am thinking I just want to be done with thinking about alcohol and maybe it is time to quit. I am 3 weeks without alcohol and was going to do a 30 day challenge but I will probably just keep going. Last year I did Sober October and continued on through November and then started drinking again. I am really concerned about my husband's drinking and I feel like I really can't say anything about it if I am still drinking with him. But that is a journey he has to take and mine
is separate from his. Keep up the good work in knowing what you want.
Thank you and good luck with your journey.
23 years for me and I’ve just been diagnosed with cirrhosis. Lucky I stopped them . 😅
Loved this I am also alcohol free however would drink if I was visiting Champagne 🍾 regin
The romance of the moment - Porto drinking port - is a real real tester
Yep...Steve's still romancing (the sophistication of) beer, wine, and spirits. And so am I. It's been culturally and biologically ingrained in me since pre-birth.
That's a lovely turn of phrase, not heard that one before.
I've just broken mine after 4 months gutted ain't the word
Don't beat yourself up mate. Just make a decision to stop again and put it behind you
Hey Steve, it’s crazy because after getting the WHOOP, I also gave up drinking. Because of the data that I was seeing on my recoveries after I would have a night of drinking. But I actually recently had to start again, because my resting heart rate was getting too low after not drinking. it was dropping below 40 bpm while I was sleeping and I kept getting warnings about it. So now I’m back to drinking just a few drinks a week and hoping that that will raise my resting heart rate enough that I won’t get those warnings anymore.
Hey it's none of my business obviously but if I were to see low HR during sleep (which is generally quite normal in healthy people) I wouldn't move to doing something very unhealthy to "correct" the low overnight HR. I would see a Dr and see what they say, there could be another cause you're not aware of or it could be nothing to worry about and you're now drinking for no reason. Or your HR is not being picked up by your device correctly for whatever reason... 😊
@@chrischild3667I am seeing my doctor next week! But I saw a clear drop in RHR after quitting. I don’t drink that much. Maybe 3 per week so at such a low dose, if it means I’m not feeling light headed, I’m willing to do it! But we will see what my doctor says!
I stopped drinking Whiskey and Brandy 16 years ago, Cigarettes also, Alcohol was easier than smoking. I had such a scare from drink by my Doctor it frightened me half to death. I still have an occasional pang for both but know it would be to my demise. Its a wicked game and i knew all the time as i am a healthcare professional. Its addiction and when you are an adult and don't require permission to go to the shops its just too easy.
11:50 -> that's what I actually did before quitting drinking: I went to the Champagne region for a long weekend, did some tours at Champagne houses, visited a champagne grower. Sort of as a goodbye trip to alcohol. Same thing I would probably do when visiting Scotland (already visited Porto, the ports under the bridge were nice). But to plan an entire holiday around alcohol seems far too excessive now.
God bless, Julien!
After 30 years of problem drinking, I stopped drinking for nearly 11 months. Felt stressed and depressed that whole time, unable to relax. My counsellor suggested I had ADHD, which confirmed my suspicions. I was on an immediate high as things starting to make sense... Decided I was fixed, decided it was safe to drink again. 2 months later I've been drinking almost daily.
So lesson 1: if repeated attempts to cut down or reset fail, you have Alcohol Use Disorder.
Lesson 2: you've probably also got underlying mental health issues or ADHD. Treat those too.
Lesson 3: alcohol withdrawal can last months or years
For me 20 years older. I was a wine sipper, homemade every day, secret drink alone type drinker, and big tolerance never drunk, surprise my liver signalled to my doctor to tell me i had to stop. For 2 years ive been mostly stopped, then that stage 3 brain telling me, well you deserve one, lets go, but truth is my body has maxed out its tolerance for alcohol, there is no margin for error, no trips to Champagne or Porto ville.
Very Interesting - Thanks !!!!!!!! Its absolutely etched in our DNA (Brits) go thew football, Beer, Go to a Birthday, Beer, Wedding, Booze Up, Funeral, Booze Up, Xmas - Boozy! Holiday Abroad - All Inclusive drink as much as you can (i have many times) the thought of going for an Indian (which is one of my long time hobbys) without having a few Cold Cobras or Kingfishers is !!!!!!!!!! we / i need wiping & re programming !!!!!! Thanks Again Steve! Ive ordered that 1st book!
Great video very honest and one I can relate too. Thankyou
Once I start I can't stop ,no more ,47 yrs of age
Just found you great video thank you 🙏
Awesome, thank you!
Really interesting and very thought-provoking, Steve. Good for you. Did you make a mistake (in drinking those ports)? At some point in the future, I guess you'll know the answer to that. Couldn't be more impressed, Steve. Total respect. 👍🤗
Very true, fellow light skin bro
Just passed 13 months. All I think about is when I'm going to have my "first beer" 😖
Read or listen to Alcohol explained. You are causing yourself completely unnecessary turmoil by wondering when your next drink will be. Seriously, get the book on audible and listen to it all and see how you feel afterwards.
@andyb311 Yeah I'm my own worst enemy, always have been. I have a 10 day all inclusive holiday early 2025 and that's another thing that's driving my mind crazy as it would be my first ever time abroad alcohol free (providing I last that long) 😖
@@paulmulks I know the feeling mate I really do. I can't recommend the book more for someone in your position though. It's the only thing that really made it click in my mind. Give it a try!!
@andyb311 Will do, cheers bro 👍🏻
Concentrate on your last beer you had. Remember how it was bad for your life, then the idea if a first drink will sound daft
I feel somewhat shielded from the temptation of the connoisseur as I only drank rum and cokes for years. Like, maybe if I’m ever on the pirate ship ride at disney? I will, however, still have an occasional coke with sushi or pizza.
3 years, 4 months and counting. Never going back.
Did 3 years sober. Then relapsed. That was 4 years ago. Still drinking every day.
Good video. What stage of alcoholism were you at? 2 or 3?
Last drink was NYE 2023. I'm not going to lie, I do miss it 😢. I want to drink in moderation again, similar to how it was described in this video, but I don't know if I can hold back after starting 😢 So I just don't do it at all.
Read the book The Naked Mind. Annie Grace. She was influenced by Alan Carr, mentioned in this video. I don’t miss it at all after that book. I hate it. It’s like a toxic ex I got rid of and am grateful every day that bitch named booze is out of my life. You won’t miss it anymore. You will be excited for life without booze.
@@davesage4931 Thank you. I'll give it a read.
I'd have had a Bellini ,so hard to refuse
Been watching many of your videos , love them , very knowledgeable, I’d love to be your friend 👍
great video.. I love it
I'm glad you like it
The hard fact is all addiction is easy to over come but heroin. The only issue is you. Change your perception and anything is easy to over come. Ive over come alcholism, a wild drug addiction inc a daily LSD addiction. Ive taken everything but heroin, lay in a pool of my own blood more times than i can remember. I took so many drugs one night, i died and revived in hospital. All my exits have been quick. Next day cold turkey. Other than my smoking addiction i got going on now. Im testing the waters to see how it goes over cold turkey. Its surprisingly going well. I dont think i could of done this a year ago. Gone fron 1-2 an hour to 1-2 a day. I'll be down to 0 next week. God speed to anyone beating addiction. You can do it, i got faith in you.
can't figure out why sound is not working. I wanted to support your video. No, I don't drink, can't stand how it makes me feel. I don't like the flavors. I wish you all the best and wish I could have heard what you have to say. I don't like to be around drunks.
I think at this point I would prefer a sober day anywhere than a drinking day.
TIP: Just dont drink. Don't tell people you stopped drinking. Just turn down drinks. No need to explain anything.
Bellinis are quite nice. Port is rank.
You cannot be a Temporary Sober Person. The reason is you still believe that Alcohol is a benefit to you in some way. This is a drug and the way drugs work is you get addicted quite quickly. Once you make a commitment to stop and you are able to stop you should be able to embrace sobriety and make it your identity. 18 months is quite a time when you fall off the wagon. With me I have been sober for 4 years now and i never get tempted or associate with the substance. I have the identity of a non drinker now and I love this feeling.
i really dislike this logic man because staying away from the booze for any amount of time is a help :)
@@Ah__ah__ah__ah.
So then all the time is even better.
The thing with saying I am quitting forever is that put"s so much pressure on you and you are sort of white nuckling sobriety. What you need to do is just take it one day at a time and not count day's that you are sober. It is like Life. We should not dwell on the past because that is gone, it is history. We should not try to forecast the future, as this is impossible, what we can do is live in this moment.
@@dipakrawal1509
I hate alcohol and all it took from me when I chose to have it part of my life. I get the one day at a time thing, but for me it’s for the eat of my life. Not “I can’t have it”….. but more of a “fuck alcohol” position.
I say “ I love alcohol but it dosn’t like me”
yes the 20 % got too good at it
I’m interested in trying to reset alcohol tolerance.. did you find that after 18 months not drinking that when you had the port it hit you hard? Or did you have much the same tolerance as before to it? Thanks
My tolerance is much lower now.
11 yrs-I tell folks that 999 out of the 1000 regrets I have involve booze
do you still consume caffeine? that messes with your head also
I love beer. 🍺😊
The man takes a drink... The drink takes a drink... The drink takes the man.
What does it mean
Would not risk it- it’s a slippery slope.
You have to be sober 100% of the time if you are an alcoholic. Having a drink in a specific region sounds a slippery slope. What next Scotland = Whiskey. Russia = vodka. Rum = Jamaica ?
No way would I have drink under any circumstances ,the thought is hideous 2 me .but that's just me .if u can handle a drink the n no judgement😊
Research "The Sinclair Method" abstinence is NOT the only way to treat Alcohol Use Disorder. Neither is it the most effective or successful.
Recovery the issue? 1-2iu of HGH per day fam. Sleep is crazy good