How Far Is TOO FAR In Christian Dating?

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  • Опубликовано: 11 мар 2020
  • ‘How Far Is TOO FAR In Christian Dating?’
    Kissing, touching, holding hands.. what’s okay and what’s too far? We’re laying down some practical wisdom. As with all areas of our life, our focus should be to honor God in our relationships and purity. Hope this video is helpful!
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Комментарии • 333

  • @PaulandMorgan
    @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +58

    Hey Fam, here’s a question: Would you consider waiting till the alter for your first kiss?😊 Also let us know what you thought of the video!

    • @kellyromero5987
      @kellyromero5987 4 года назад +3

      Paul and Morgan yuuhhh😌

    • @erinwheelerr
      @erinwheelerr 4 года назад +7

      i’m planning on kissing this guy really soon, probably next time i’m alone with him, but i’m not even dating him yet😂

    • @misssud8440
      @misssud8440 4 года назад +11

      I definitely want to wait for my next first kiss until my wedding day.

    • @live_unafraid47
      @live_unafraid47 4 года назад +12

      I wish I had waited, and I wish I would have known how to set boundries before I started dating. That would have saved me a lot of heartache.

    • @robertrodriguez3163
      @robertrodriguez3163 4 года назад +12

      I’m waiting to kiss until marriage. It keeps interactions thoughtful, intellectual, and emotional rather than physical.

  • @lynnjoellegardner10
    @lynnjoellegardner10 4 года назад +235

    I'm sorry, but the 9pm or midnight thing is kind of invalid, stuff happens at all hours of the day

    • @kaygalvan9583
      @kaygalvan9583 4 года назад +13

      LynnJoelle Gardner I was hoping someone would say that😂

    • @mwst2095
      @mwst2095 4 года назад +29

      LynnJoelle Gardner I disagree. Speaking as a high school teenager, lots of my friends are much more likely to make poor choices at night when they’re sleepy and not thinking straight than during the day. I’m not justifying this, I’m just saying it is kinda true

    • @wengel_eth
      @wengel_eth 4 года назад +5

      It really depends where you are with the time of day. You can be hanging out with a bunch of friends late at night and I'd consider it fine. But being alone together for extended periods of time gets worse the later the time is.

    • @SupahNerd
      @SupahNerd 4 года назад +4

      What you're saying about things happening all times of the day is true for the most part, but think about what Jesus said in John 3. Darkness hides things. I can attest to that.

    • @auroradlg154
      @auroradlg154 4 года назад +1

      I understand that more stuff happens at like bars, clubs and places of sorts. They don't even open in the day. The streets are more dangerous at night too. But when it comes to sex... yep, that can happen at any time.

  • @Dmchadra
    @Dmchadra 4 года назад +66

    making a “want, will, won’t” list with your significant other I’ve found is very helpful in setting boundaries

  • @kaygalvan9583
    @kaygalvan9583 4 года назад +107

    As Christians we should be chasing purity. CHASING! It’s not about “how far can I go” but more-so asking is what I’m/were doing keeping us in that pursuit of purity and the Lords righteousness!❤️

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +6

      Amen, love it!

    • @Jessie20032
      @Jessie20032 4 года назад +3

      Amen! Definitely for sure. We should have that discernment or conviction about this and think what should we be doing if Jesus was sitting right next to you, if that makes sense , to have set boundaries and know God has these and wants us to obey them for our own protection.

  • @intello94
    @intello94 4 года назад +30

    You decided you could kiss her because her father agreed to let you marry her... Not because she had agreed to marry you. I don't grand the logic behind that. If you both decide you don't want to kiss before engagement that's fine but surely that decision should be between the 2 adults in the relationship.

  • @sarahrottier4173
    @sarahrottier4173 4 года назад +23

    Thank you Lucy for speaking on boundaries starting in the mind and heart! Having gone though this (thoughts crossing bounadries and then crossing physical boundaries) I can speak on how important it is to monitor/controll your thoughts and heart.

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад

      Right on, thanks for the comment Sarah❤️

  • @megship
    @megship 4 года назад +70

    I agree that the “how far” question is the wrong question, but I think this video feeds into that question because it sets lines and boundaries that aren’t in Scripture. I think the church misses a great opportunity to teach on the Holy Spirit in this area - I believe there is gray area in Scripture so that we are each compelled to seek the Lord & enter an intimate relationship with Him. Our hearts crave the law, but we’ve entered a better covenant. //// There is certainly room to exercise wisdom in setting physical boundaries in a relationship, but I think that sometimes overemphasizing this topic (it’s beaten to death in young adult ministry) is contributing to the problem by over-sexualizing hand-holding, hugging, and even kissing. The focus is so centered on what not to do, rather than focusing on setting your mind on Jesus (Phil 4:8). Yes, all of those things can lead to sex. But not necessarily for everyone - to the pure, all things are pure. I’ve watched friends walk in pure relationships with kissing involved. I love Jesus and have been walking with Him for 9 years, and I honestly don’t regret kissing my highschool boyfriend. I understand many people do, but I personally don’t - just like I don’t regret holding his hand. //// my two cents!

    • @bluemaverick5641
      @bluemaverick5641 4 года назад +9

      Yes thank you! Not everyone is tempted the same way. And I absolutely agree about oversexualizing things and not leaving room for prayer personal reflection.

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +5

      Megan Shipman appreciate the perspective :)

    • @rebaeileen4371
      @rebaeileen4371 4 года назад +3

      Very refreshing perspective, friend!!

    • @permabased1775
      @permabased1775 4 года назад +2

      Megan Shipman this is absolutely refreshing to hear, Amen! Other cultures in the world practice kissing and hugging as normal etiquette for greeting. Touch, caressing etc., is not seen a sexual, much more “physical” than typical American etiquette. It is your perception and maturity in Christ which determines your boundaries.

  • @annamcconnell8451
    @annamcconnell8451 4 года назад +76

    2:02 - The girl on the left literally highlighted everything wrong with fundamentalism - fear tactics.

    • @graceblackfordmusic
      @graceblackfordmusic 4 года назад +2

      yup!

    • @caitm.193
      @caitm.193 4 года назад +2

      She's the girl on the left, but then again, I get left and right mixed up all the time.😅
      Anyway, yeah, her saying that surprises me. I was reading the comments when I heard her, and I was caught a bit off guard.
      Girl: "...I think it was just, like, a fear tactic..."
      Me: (...Wait, what? I must've misinterpreted that...)😐

    • @annamcconnell8451
      @annamcconnell8451 4 года назад

      Cait M. Hahaha oops I think I was so shocked she said that I didn’t realise I got it wrong hahaha

    • @gracepearson5905
      @gracepearson5905 4 года назад

      I thought for a second you were on about her makeup and I was like um ok 😂 but yeah I picked up on that too, at least she recognises it

    • @JustyMe
      @JustyMe 4 года назад

      That was sad and disgusting at the same time 😣 ugh, what a terrible thing to be taught

  • @berith4294
    @berith4294 4 года назад +29

    Loved the video! 😊 Another thing is that if you get physical really fast you might lose sight of the important things - what God is telling you and how your beliefs and personalities go together, just because your heart is way more involved :) That's this bond that Morgan was talking about

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад

      Exactly right! 🙏

    • @Nerco-hz4hr
      @Nerco-hz4hr 4 года назад

      Glad you support a narcissist control freak.

    • @kassperlynwoods-mott5184
      @kassperlynwoods-mott5184 4 года назад

      Yes! I was reading a book and it said " the heart cannot love what the mind does not know" it was talking about our relationship with God but I think this is true in all relationships. A relationship built on physical arousal and emotion wont last

    • @LipSyncLover
      @LipSyncLover 4 года назад

      Well. Yes. That's why I asked my fiance a lot of the tougher deal breaker questions up front. But once compatibility was established there which took a month or so, I needed to make sure we were physically compatible too. I've had relationships where everything was great on paper but we just weren't very sexually compatible

  • @mirandasmith2199
    @mirandasmith2199 4 года назад +32

    Suggestion:
    By telling people "be careful kissing your partner, it can lead to you wanting sex!" That's a scare tactic, and in most cases, it's unhelpful and shame inducing. I would love to see you guys approach this topic from a place where you're teaching people to create their own personal boundaries in their physical relationships in collaboration with God, and to honor those boundaries as well as the other person's.

  • @piplecorn
    @piplecorn 4 года назад +36

    but abstinence can often lead to people getting married REALLY early...like date for two months and get married early. if abstinence is good for you, great. but don’t force it on others... who is to say what is good for one Christian person and not good for another? everyone is different and Christianity, as well as what’s considered “holy”, shouldn’t be black and white.

    • @rebekah6522
      @rebekah6522 4 года назад +6

      The Bible is to say.

    • @piplecorn
      @piplecorn 4 года назад

      Rebekah • okay, but WHERE in the bible? and, who’s to say that maybe those verses mean something different. everything in the bible is interpreted so differently... if abstinence is something that’s good for you, great! but it’s wrong in my opinion to force your views and morals onto others. saying that ALL christians NEED to prioritize abstinence is just absurd...

    • @rebekah6522
      @rebekah6522 4 года назад +3

      @@piplecorn God wants christians to stay pure and save themselves for one. The Bible has many verses about sexual immorality. If you want to see those verses heres a website that contains them all www.biblestudytools.com/topical-verses/bible-verses-about-abstinence/. But to interpret the verses, christians need to look at what the verse actually says.

    • @HaoPieldeoso
      @HaoPieldeoso 4 года назад +2

      @@piplecorn Then you are not a Christian. The Bible does talk about the mortal sin of fornication and sexual immorality, the interpretation is up to the religious authorities of the church you follow. IN any case, never have I met any religious authority of any church whose interpretation of the Bible in relation to sex is not "abstinence until marriage". There are very few things that all churches and all religions agree on. No sex until marriage is one of them. You can't talk your way out of it by believing "the Bible can be interpreted differently" because that is no different from moral relativism. If in doubt, ask the priest, if you committed the sin, TRULY regret having done so and you'll be a virgin again. God forgives those who truly repent. Morgan had sex before marriage, but she repented, so she did marry as a virgin, for God had forgiven her sin.
      The only "grey area" is "how far is too far". There are many interpretations to this but the most "liberal" I've heard so far is "everything but intercourse", but then again, when in doubt, as your priest.

    • @victoriaumukoro116
      @victoriaumukoro116 4 года назад +2

      The bible das you should flee from fornication

  • @vanzrox1
    @vanzrox1 4 года назад +12

    God takes us through these processes/situations/circumstances which the end result lead us to be ultimately happy and satisfied in Him too! :)

  • @alinehaigassadourian2734
    @alinehaigassadourian2734 4 года назад

    These conversations four of you had is so powerful. I truly LOVE your channel. I do not take every little thing like 9pm or midnight so deep seriously but take the meaning behind your message. Thank you for inviting your friends over. I see the light in them. Love you Paul and Morgan!

  • @keshealm
    @keshealm 4 года назад +7

    So glad I’m not the only one that has these convictions

  • @rominafalk9668
    @rominafalk9668 4 года назад +6

    You're guy's are so inspiring.....sooo agree with you....had some experience with this topic....you guy's are helping me so much....thanks for everything....may God continue to use you
    With love from Paraguay ♥️

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Romina Falk awe praise God thank you😊❤️

  • @kevienadixon1664
    @kevienadixon1664 4 года назад +9

    Thanks for this video!!! It was so inspirational 🙌🙌🙌💛💛💛. Makes me really want to wait for any kind of physical intimacy with my future Husband 💛. I love when Lucy said that it would be cool if you can tell your husband that he is the first person you ever kissed😍

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +3

      Awe good😊 Thanks for the comment!

  • @jose_juarez_42
    @jose_juarez_42 4 года назад +10

    Definitely getting in and out of the car is important cuz staying inside gets passionate

  • @thenaturalmomshomestead_
    @thenaturalmomshomestead_ 4 года назад +6

    I can COMPLETELY SAY THIS IS TRUE!!!! It’s worth it to wait okay, I did not wait I messed up as a teenager but I saved myself for 4 years and I messed up one time in a season of loneliness and I am 4 months pregnant and I was NOT dating this person so I am now going to be a single mom. I believe this baby is a miracle but I wish I would have waited and could experience this with my husband. This was Gods plan for me and he brings blessing out of darkness but is this going to be really hard and do I wish I would have waited? YES.

    • @cabpeer5963
      @cabpeer5963 3 года назад +2

      How are you and the baby doing now?

    • @thenaturalmomshomestead_
      @thenaturalmomshomestead_ 3 года назад +3

      @@cabpeer5963 I’m actually feeding my baby right now he is here and healthy born on October 3rd

  • @kassperlynwoods-mott5184
    @kassperlynwoods-mott5184 4 года назад +2

    One of my leaders at camp (Hannah Bridge) told me that the bible says we should flee from sin and fornication( 2 Timothy 2:22 and 1 Corinthians 6:18) asking " how far is too far?" Is not fleeing from sin, its coming right up to it. We shouldnt put outrselves in situations where we could be tempted and sin. I admire y'all, Paul and Morgan, for talking about these things for us young people dont get to hear from anyone else. Love y'all💞😊🙌

  • @angylouv
    @angylouv 4 года назад +2

    oh man, I missed you guys so much. I got lost but found the way again. Thanks for your videos

  • @carmenmorris580
    @carmenmorris580 4 года назад +14

    Anyways, I came across your videos around a yearish ago and I am so grateful. No one talks about boundaries. I’ve learned SO MUCH from the both of you as well as Nate and Sutton. I’m down to the point of not even wanting to kiss anyone if I’m not married and PEOPLE THINK IM CRAZY.

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Awe so glad to hear that😊❤️

    • @kristinballancemusic
      @kristinballancemusic 4 года назад +2

      You're not crazy! My hubbs and I waited until the altar for our first kiss and a lot of other things. We don't regret it at all! In fact, we have said over and over how glad we are that we waited!

  • @marflz5500
    @marflz5500 4 года назад +1

    So true, I felt all of that and it was really hard to be confortable with myself again. Even do I do not agree with waiting that much to kiss I think that it's important that you are able to talk about what happens when you run to fast.

  • @user-df8hl4zx2l
    @user-df8hl4zx2l 4 года назад +4

    Heya, good to see everything going well! I love your content, keep it up!

  • @kinkin233
    @kinkin233 4 года назад +23

    Ok this video is super practical but a question. You guys dated for 4 months and then were married 4 months later. How do couples who have to wait a while do the waiting thing? I know getting married is a good way to do it but sometimes not an option. I am finishing school and my boyfriend and I have to get some things in order financially before we can. Thanks guys love the videos.

    • @elizab8844
      @elizab8844 4 года назад +2

      That's what I'm thinking. My sister married her boyfriend after 4 years of dating him just because they had to wait until they were adults. (our opinion)

    • @victoriachannell8251
      @victoriachannell8251 4 года назад +4

      Million dollar question 👆 not everyone can get married right away. Sometimes it feels like boundaries have to keep on being reestablished. It's just best to not put yourselves in a position where it's easy to go further.

  • @gleshablerrielsoynip8603
    @gleshablerrielsoynip8603 4 года назад +3

    Hi there fam❤️, I've been praying for the both for you ate morgan and kuya paul, please press on, I know we know the enemy is not happy with you being so Frankly Christian, a lot of people might not like the both of you, but as long as your serving God with deep sincerity everything is under His control, please keep up the work for Jesus you inspire young people like us! Don't faint for we will reap our reward in due season, your fan Risha ❤️😊

  • @Candace-M-
    @Candace-M- 4 года назад +2

    I really liked this video with your guests! They made some reaaally good points on this topic! One thing just leads to another, and yes, it starts in our imaginations! What we focus on determines what actions well take.
    I also wanted to add that usually the people asking "how far is too far" just want to know how bad can I be and it be ok? Sexual immorality will carry into marriage. If you're wanting to sneak around before marriage, then can you trust yourself and the person you're with to have a sexually pure mindset while married?! It doesn't change when you've officially tied the knot. It actually becomes more of a challenge. So addressing that mindset is so important while dating. I wish so badly that my husband and I did that! Also addressing the porn issue is a big deal too.
    💜

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад

      Appreciate the honest insight, Candace❤️❤️

  • @toliseadkisson7124
    @toliseadkisson7124 4 года назад

    ❤❤❤ Loved it! Thx for being transparent and real! If I had to do it all over again I would definitely wait until marriage before giving that gift.

  • @zogly9469
    @zogly9469 4 года назад +18

    Good video. I did enjoy the guests. :) Morgan mentioned the right mindset early in the video: asking how far is "too far' is kind of like putting your toe all the way up to the line. Far better to view things as a progression and start far back from the line, gradually bringing things in as you grow to know each other and more confident that you are a good match. "too far" over texting was a good point as well. It's amazing how just a few loving words over text can affect you. Plus, it's often easier to say something over text than in person, so the chance of saying more than is intended or beneficial is higher. To answer your question, yes. I think kissing should be engagement-level escalation, provided that it is a short engagement. It would be cool to wait all the way to the wedding day, but that's not a "must" for me. ;)

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +2

      Appreciate you sharing, bro! Good thoughts 😊

    • @abigailbetts3421
      @abigailbetts3421 4 года назад +2

      I agree. I decided to wait until I'm engaged to kiss and I've thought about waiting until marriage to do so, but as I prayed about it I don't feel peace about setting that boundary without input from my boyfriend/fiance.

    • @abigailbetts3421
      @abigailbetts3421 4 года назад +1

      ​@ScottKipple First of all I hope, I never treat a human being like a car, that's just sad. Secondly, I have had chemistry with guys in the past without having to kiss them. Usually, I can tell without even touching them. My friends who want me to kiss will even tell me they can see the chemistry I have with certain guys. Finally, I have never kissed my dad so I wouldn't know what it's like. Chemistry changes. I've gained chemistry with guys I'd never noticed before. I've lost chemistry with guys I don't like anymore. It's not something to build a relationship off of. Besides I don't just date "nice" guys. I've always made sure I was attracted to him and excited about the relationship.

  • @izzynarnia3619
    @izzynarnia3619 4 года назад +9

    I totally needed this video

  • @michellejose8336
    @michellejose8336 3 года назад +1

    This really helped, I needed this. Thank you so much!

  • @Emii-blessed
    @Emii-blessed 4 года назад +4

    Whaaaat??? In my opinion if you don't kiss or hug how you want to show your affection sometimes is necessary

  • @sedricgranger
    @sedricgranger 4 года назад +9

    It can be tough to know whether certain things in a relationship abide to God’s laws. Embarrassment vs ashamed rule is a good indicator. If you feel ashamed if someone were to catch you doing what you and your girlfriend/boyfriend are doing then it’s sinful more than likely but if you just feel embarrassed then it’s okay✊🏾 use that discernment from God! Thanks for the positive videos! These have a great impact on my life, especially as a young man of God

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Sedric Granger appreciate your insight😊

  • @gregorythomasii10
    @gregorythomasii10 4 года назад

    Thanks for the advice. You guys are amazing. Keep up the great work.

  • @kristenfleming6297
    @kristenfleming6297 4 года назад +3

    Love this video!! Loved the guests and also, agree with the strict Boundary setting. I haven’t been in a serious relationship yet however I know God has my husband and future planned already so I have no worries. Especially knowing my relationship with the Lord and the boundaries I will set forth. Thanks guys!

  • @JMKrech
    @JMKrech 3 года назад

    Although it seems “extreme” it’s really great advice and this really honors the Lord!

  • @sevp.8185
    @sevp.8185 4 года назад

    I LOVE THE GUESTS!!!! More videos with them!!! MOOOREEEEE!!!

  • @julianacalvo5059
    @julianacalvo5059 4 года назад +25

    Caroline and Lucy are awesome!!!! I'd love to see them again!!!

  • @chosentobe7137
    @chosentobe7137 4 года назад +5

    I love this channel! We need young people to keep encouraging this! We are a young and HOLY GENERATION.

  • @kamahorodaphnepatra
    @kamahorodaphnepatra 4 года назад +6

    Hi Paul and Morgan so I have this issue .yes I love to follow boundaries and even spirit tells me.
    But there is this guilt that comes upon me like oh am acting so strict, the guy is going to think am so damn serious and so i feel like skipping my boundaries so that I may not look so serious

    • @bluemaverick5641
      @bluemaverick5641 4 года назад +2

      In general you should stick to your boundaries. Any guy who doesn't respect your boundaries is not someone you should be in a relationship with.

  • @pinevalleyfarm4941
    @pinevalleyfarm4941 4 года назад +14

    Yall are some of the best folks on youtube,even though yall get some of the most rude comments from some people.that just means yall are speaking truth and people dont like the truth.keep up the great work and dont let all the hateful comments get to you. keep spreading the love of Jesus. God Bless.

    • @claubit32
      @claubit32 4 года назад +1

      Amen! Great Comment.:)

    • @makenziejacobson1349
      @makenziejacobson1349 4 года назад +5

      I'm pretty sure slavery got a lot of hate too, but most everyone nowadays would agree keeping slaves is wrong. Just because you get hate for something doesn't make it the truth or okay. Paul and Morgan are ridiculous fundamentalists who spread beliefs that hurt people. How is that ever okay?

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад

      Pine Valley Farm thanks so much❤️🙏

  • @alinehaigassadourian2734
    @alinehaigassadourian2734 4 года назад +1

    Being holy is like being like Jesus.
    We are sheep following Shephard (God). Shephard will protect our marriage and guide us through it. If we have Jesus in our relationship and honor him. We will be ashamed if we cross the lines. That is the holy spirit moving your heart giving you discomfort in your actions. This truly helps us from major hardships and heartbreaks in our lives. I was in an Ungodly relationship, it ended up horribly. I'm saying this because I experienced it. I understand the difference now. I want a relationship with honoring God and his commandments. If it reached to marriage, then I know my marriage papers will be written in a rock, not on sand. No matter how strong the wind blows, it can't break it. That is because of Jesus.

  • @edenalekssandria
    @edenalekssandria 4 года назад +5

    I had my first kiss about a month ago from a guy that told me he was interested in pursuing a relationship with me while we were cuddled on his bed. It was strange to me that I didn't feel a thing. I had to stop him from going further because of how I was portraying myself and the "saving myself for marriage" talk I had given him earlier, but I still didn't feel "excited" or butterflies or anything like that. Besides the kissing being awkward, I didn't feel like I was being tempted or doing something inappropriate. Is that normal or usual? I do have to say that I thought about the kisses way after the moment passed... Fast forward to today, we don't talk or see each other. Dude was going thru the motions, I guess xD Anyways, don't know if anyone cared, but I still shared :)

  • @hillarywolfe455
    @hillarywolfe455 3 года назад

    I place great importance on physical boundaries, but it is extraordinarily difficult to find at man (at 30 years of age) who does too. I don't think I will find one who will be okay with no kissing until marriage!

  • @chosentobe7137
    @chosentobe7137 4 года назад +4

    I am getting MARRIED soon!!!! This is encouraging!

  • @Fawngirl11
    @Fawngirl11 3 года назад

    I love seeing all these comments from people who think they know better than the LORD about waiting/not waiting..... I guess we should really be listening to you and experiences based off what you desire in the moment rather than what God teaches us......

  • @portialovee1720
    @portialovee1720 4 года назад +1

    This helped me so much thank you😁💫

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Awe good!

    • @portialovee1720
      @portialovee1720 4 года назад +1

      Paul and Morgan I recently rededicated my life to the Lord and broke up with my bf because we were sexually active and he didn’t want to stop. But now he wants to pursue the Lord and tries to make me feel bad for not wanting to get back together so soon. I kept asking the Lord what should I do in the meantime while he is seeking you? Should I continue to date him? Came across this video and got my answer I’ve been trying to set up boundaries some of them which my ex not very fond of like us not sleeping in the same bed although we’re not having sex

  • @rachelleyland5376
    @rachelleyland5376 4 года назад +6

    No matter what, whether you are engaged or not, you are not one flesh until you are married. the Bible says if a man lusts in his heart he commits adultery, so even in the engagement season, if you are kissing, this obviously sparks thoughts and feelings for the person. I think a better question to ask is what is lust and adultery? If it is even leading to thoughts of lust for the other person, there should be more walls up for physical contact. Blessings

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад

      Good insight, thanks for sharing😊

  • @shanleecaulfield7064
    @shanleecaulfield7064 3 года назад +1

    In my experience I have had so many Christians who got married when they were like 18 or in their early 20s tell me that I should wait to have sex when I’m married and that I should control my desires until that happens. It’s easy for them to say that because they didn’t have to control theirs for that long. What happens if you don’t meet the one you’re supposed to marry until you’re in your 30s or 40s? Are you really just supposed to suppress all your sexual desires until then? That just sounds like torture.

  • @divine.6092
    @divine.6092 4 года назад +2

    Awesome video
    I love you guys!

  • @tracymonique4159
    @tracymonique4159 4 года назад +3

    I have a crush on a lovely guy at church. From the first time I saw him, I just felt something special in my heart. However, I just found out that he has a girlfriend back home (we're in our 2nd year of university and she's just finished high school). I feel like we would be really suited for each other. What do I do? Just try to forget about him and move on? Pursue a friendship?

    • @leeannatweed8811
      @leeannatweed8811 4 года назад

      Tell him how you feel respectfully.

    • @klig8686
      @klig8686 4 года назад +4

      I'm gonna tell you what you don't want to hear, really what I think would be best for you is to cut it off until your feelings disappear. if you do decide to be friends, that's also okay you do what's best for you!! what isn't best for anyone is for you to express your feelings, no matter how respectful I don't see any good out come. 💕💕

  • @emilykropidlowski1359
    @emilykropidlowski1359 4 года назад

    I love these girls! Please have them on the show again!

  • @kellyromero5987
    @kellyromero5987 4 года назад +3

    And yes I enjoyed Caroline and Lucy.

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Kelly Romero they are awesome😊🙌

  • @larevival4074
    @larevival4074 4 года назад +9

    Wait until the wedding before doing anything physical (ok a side hug) because engagements can end unfortunately and you won’t have regrets

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +2

      There is wisdom in that :)

    • @claubit32
      @claubit32 4 года назад +1

      Good point. That's a smart thing to do.:)

  • @christyn1459
    @christyn1459 4 года назад +2

    I really enjoyed this video, y'all give the best advice. I'm trying to learn all this stuff before I start dating.
    This definitely seems like something Jaclyn Glenn and God is Grey will be mean about.

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Glad you found it helpful😊❤️

  • @kalvincj
    @kalvincj 3 года назад +1

    It's rare to see religious people like you guys.
    AHH... Shivering in my head.

  • @ravenlaprade5052
    @ravenlaprade5052 4 года назад +2

    How long should an engagement be?

  • @blackarchon8778
    @blackarchon8778 4 года назад +2

    What if you do know them thoroughly spiritually and mentally before becoming physical but arent married

    • @LipSyncLover
      @LipSyncLover 4 года назад +1

      Then I would say you're looking to the wrong people for advice.
      Don't let religious fundies control you

  • @alyssabird720
    @alyssabird720 4 года назад +12

    My boyfriend and I have been together for 1.5 years and have not even kissed yet. We also don't hug sitting down/cuddle/ embrace for long periods. I know it will be great when we finally get married, though. I can't wait 😂😍

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +2

      😊❤️

    • @kendramac3969
      @kendramac3969 4 года назад +2

      Omg girl yesss!!! It’s amazing that’s your perspective on Christian dating! Totally couple goals😊

    • @ohuntermc9321
      @ohuntermc9321 4 года назад +1

      Alyssa Hoyt That’s quite dangerous, if you’ve had no physical contact, even kissing then you might have a problem after you get married If the chemistry does not work, it’s happened before

    • @alyssabird720
      @alyssabird720 4 года назад +2

      @@ohuntermc9321 oh, it won't be a problem. :) I've never had more attraction to someone. Because he treats me well, is attractive in general, and I know I want to be with him intimately. No doubt there :) thanks, though!

    • @ohuntermc9321
      @ohuntermc9321 4 года назад +2

      Alyssa Hoyt But you have not kissed or even embraced each other properly. You’re probably be on the safe side doing that then disappointed on the honeymoon. Don’t see how you could think God would be raging at two people contacting by their lips. Think you guys are taking it way too far.

  • @shadyabrown-hall5955
    @shadyabrown-hall5955 4 года назад +7

    Great video. I've already kissed. I don't feel bad but, I just wish it would of been with someone who I knew I was going to marry. I had strict boundaries set and my ex just didn't agree so he left but, it's ok. Someone new and better is on the horizon. I can feel it 😊😘

  • @janp6621
    @janp6621 4 года назад +32

    The immaturity displayed here is interesting considering two are married. Wow!

  • @forestdaydreams9447
    @forestdaydreams9447 4 года назад +2

    Thankyou, this is the exact video I needed to see right now

  • @justraven9082
    @justraven9082 4 года назад +2

    I’ve been watching many of your guys videos on kissing, hugging, and overall dating and I am a Christian and I’m dating someone who I just found out doesn’t believe in God. Like at all. So I feel upset and hurt about it, but I really care about this person, do you think it’s possible for us to continue on dating and hopefully leading to marriage one day? There’s also another problem which is he struggles a LOT on the physical boundaries, is there any way I can help him?

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Hey, give this video a watch. ruclips.net/video/cAVKO4m9iWY/видео.html

    • @forestdaydreams9447
      @forestdaydreams9447 4 года назад +1

      Just as an outside perspective, it's generally a very bad idea to pursue relationships with people who you disagree with on fundamental principles.
      Ive dated as both the athiest (with an ex who was Catholic) and as the Catholic with an ex who was an athiest, both times it inevitably lead to unnecessary conflict and multiple dramas (like we're our hypothetical future kids going to be raised in the faith etc) that just didn't need to be there if we had both dated the right people for us from the start.
      I'd also say the fact he struggles to follow the boundaries you have set would suggest either he doesn't respect you as much as he says (in which case he'd respect your boundaries) or he doesn't have much control over himself /is impulsive. Neither are good traits in a future husband.

    • @laura___elise116
      @laura___elise116 4 года назад +2

      Believers should not be yolked with unbelievers. Especially if they do not share you faith or are pushing on your boundaries.
      •"What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever?"
      2 Corinthians 6:15 ESV
      •"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?"
      2 Corinthians 6:14 ESV

    • @justraven9082
      @justraven9082 4 года назад +1

      EnglishRose thank you for your advice, appreciate it. I actually broke up with him recently because I knew that he didn’t have respect for my boundaries and couldn’t agree with me in many things because of my faith in Christ, and I’m pretty sure he was looking at other women through online. I can’t believe I dated him, I guess I kept looking on the positives of our relationship instead of the negative outcomes. It really just hurts and even now, crazy as it sounds, I still (surprisingly to me) care about him a whole lot. I keep thinking on getting back with him (thinking God will change him soon enough so he can get back with me) but I think I need to keep reminding myself of all hurting in it, right?

    • @justraven9082
      @justraven9082 4 года назад +1

      laura elise thank you for those powerful verses

  • @tabitha7033
    @tabitha7033 4 года назад +4

    The physical boundaries I have set for myself are: only shaking hands during friendship and dating, no more than holding hands and side hugs during engagement, and everything else waits until I say "I do."

  • @izzynarnia3619
    @izzynarnia3619 4 года назад +5

    I honestly wish I wasnt pressured in my current relationship to go beyond boundaries. My future husband is literally going to hate me.

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +2

      Current relationship? You don’t see yourself marrying the person you are with?

    • @izzynarnia3619
      @izzynarnia3619 4 года назад +1

      @@PaulandMorgan honestly......not anymore. He has pressured me into doing stuff that I dont want to do and mentally abused me saying stuff like "no man would ever wait for you" or "God forgives all right? So no need to feel guilty". Tells me all the time that a man needs to release his sexual desires and everything

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +20

      That does not sound like a Godly man, I would get out of that relationship immediately. A Godly man will put physical purity until marriage at a high priority

    • @kevienadixon1664
      @kevienadixon1664 4 года назад +11

      @@izzynarnia3619 to add on to Paul and Morgan, that guys is not just a ungodly man, he is a JERK and MENTALLY ABUSIVE. Not even Christian guys but any man who is going to put sexual pressure on you period you should not be with. Please, don't let him keep you from serving God and being faithful you're future hubby. Who you are with obviously has not real respect for you. You are too good for someone like him. So yes, get out of that relationship. There are many CHRISTIAN men who wait for their future wives and the bible says if we know we should not do a sin, refrain from it. So that contradicts his words.

    • @Goat.Cheese
      @Goat.Cheese 4 года назад +5

      If you think you're future husband is going to "hate you" for ANY reason then you should NOT be marrying them! Marriage is built on a foundation of love. Get away from someone who may try to control you or hold things against you. It's emotionally abusive, it's not healthy, and it's not normal. Be safe!

  • @makenziejacobson1349
    @makenziejacobson1349 4 года назад +1

    5:18 Okay, sure, being physical with someone then binds you to that person so you have to be careful about what boundaries you cross. But what happens when you know someone spiritually and emotionally, you get to the alter and tie yourself to them for life before God, only to find out that you are in no way physically attracted to them? Being conscious of the fact that you CAN NOT force yourself to be attracted to someone, what do you do in this situation? I'm interested to hear your responses.

    • @lanadoesathing
      @lanadoesathing 4 года назад +1

      I think emotional and spiritual compatibility is far more important than physical compatibility. The latter is kind of a "bonus" and should not be your first priority. Also, people can change. you might no be physically attracted to them at first, but as you spend more time with them you do.

    • @makenziejacobson1349
      @makenziejacobson1349 4 года назад

      @@lanadoesathing That's a setup to make a lot of people feel pretty bad about themselves though if they do value, to an extent, physical attraction in a relationship. Physical and emotional attraction are not two separate entities, not for everyone. For a majority of people, they can't have one without the other. So then to clarify, would you tell those people to suffer for, what may amount to a good portion of their entire lives, on the off chance that they *might* become physically attracted to their spouse? Can you guarantee that "as you spend more time with them you do [gain physical attraction]"? And if you believe that you can, how?

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +2

      You need to be physically/sexually intimate before you know if you are attracted to them? You make it sound like the first time you get to look at them is at the alter

    • @makenziejacobson1349
      @makenziejacobson1349 4 года назад +1

      ​@@PaulandMorgan I appreciate that you actually took the time to answer, truly. However, answering a question with another question isn't exactly an answer. But to this I say - yes! Absolutely! You yourselves eluded to, and your friend explicitly stated in this video (6:08), that physical touch is powerful and carries so much meaning. Why then is this standard only acknowledged when it is on the side of "don't do this before marriage" but not in the case of "I'm married now and not physically attracted to this person, help"?
      Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems you are suggesting that physical attraction is and only accounts for how much you like the way a person looks. I think a lot of people would disagree with that sentiment. So then again my question is, what do you do if this is the case? If you get married and find you are not physically compatible with your spouse?

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Kenzie Jacobson I think physical attraction is different from ‘physically compatible’. You can tell if you’re physically attracted to someone rather quickly in a relationship. I think ‘physically compatible’ is more of a cultural construct and not biblical. I think if you’re committed to and choosing to love someone you will work out/grow in the physical compatibility. That’s not something we need to be too anxious about.

  • @quentinday7293
    @quentinday7293 4 года назад +2

    YES!!

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад

      😊❤️

    • @quentinday7293
      @quentinday7293 4 года назад

      Paul and Morgan I want to let you know God is using y’all to help preserve my relationship. I love you guys and so thankful for you saying yes to the call the way y’all do!

  • @MrBALLER4LIFE2324
    @MrBALLER4LIFE2324 4 года назад +8

    I love y’all but imma just say it’s crazy that you waiting tht long to kiss! IMO that’s a form of trying too hard. After spending time watching many videos from different ppl I think my girl to be and I will allowing everything as long as clothes stay on. If clothes stay on I believe you won’t be able to do anything that could lead to act of sex. Well just make it much less possible. Maybe they should start kissing earlier and their relationships would last longer because they have that intimacy but are still honoring God but refraining from the stimulating stuff. Just a thought. No malintent intended with that comment.

    • @victoriachannell8251
      @victoriachannell8251 4 года назад +2

      Things can still happen with clothes on...sadly. Any action which would bring about some sort of arousal is basically sexual. It awakens sexual feelings. Which gets your body ready to have sex.

  • @jasminewatson5723
    @jasminewatson5723 4 года назад +2

    this was interesting video

  • @HaoPieldeoso
    @HaoPieldeoso 4 года назад +3

    There is something I don't quite understand. Why would you make a video basically saying "don't cross the physical lines before marriage", but then say "but if you do make the mistake it doesnt matter"

  • @treesaroshnic.j.3663
    @treesaroshnic.j.3663 4 года назад +1

    Keep it up guys
    God bless u

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад

      Thank you😊❤️

    • @treesaroshnic.j.3663
      @treesaroshnic.j.3663 4 года назад

      Hello Paul and Morgan I have a doubt
      Will u please answer me
      Should Christian s wear covering inside the church
      Cause in the Bible it says so

    • @treesaroshnic.j.3663
      @treesaroshnic.j.3663 4 года назад

      I mean about females

    • @maino3397
      @maino3397 4 года назад

      @@treesaroshnic.j.3663 What do you mean with covering?

  • @kamahorodaphnepatra
    @kamahorodaphnepatra 4 года назад

    Question isn't setting boundaries more about us working. Then Jesus Christ sending us his spirit who will help us.
    ( though I love boundaries because I have seen them effective)

  • @Anthony-yy3kc
    @Anthony-yy3kc Год назад

    Too far is anything that causes you to want to go further! To me even kissing aroused my lust and I wanted oral sex and then all the way to vaginal sex. Some people can handle kissing, but I couldn't. So I am now abstinent and celibate.

  • @dellaswanson9837
    @dellaswanson9837 3 года назад

    Just one thing. Why is the m above the p on the wall?

  • @freemind653
    @freemind653 4 года назад +7

    Just to be clear some engagements are broken off.....i don't think that can be an excuse to kiss....if you are in it go all the way to marriage

  • @rebelgirl6252
    @rebelgirl6252 4 года назад +6

    Morgan is so wise. Caroline and Lucy are also so wise. Paul is also so wise.😂

  • @naturallyafroed2155
    @naturallyafroed2155 3 года назад

    6:30 that was fire

  • @kellyromero5987
    @kellyromero5987 4 года назад +3

    Make sense, great video :) 💯

  • @pinkpanther7369
    @pinkpanther7369 4 года назад +9

    Haha actually I'm saving my smooch for my wedding day. Future husband pucker up😂😂😁

  • @anaissp2467
    @anaissp2467 4 года назад +9

    This is hard to watch. They have obviously been extremely brainwashed by their parents and their environment.
    Now I value my agnostic upbringing way more. I am a Christian now, but I find all this purity culture obsession ridiculous. What a bunch of nonsense.

    • @LipSyncLover
      @LipSyncLover 4 года назад +2

      I would love for this ideology of purity obsession to be a dying breed

    • @forestdaydreams9447
      @forestdaydreams9447 4 года назад +1

      What makes you say they're brainwashed? That they think differently to you? That's allot of arrogance and pride on display there my friend

  • @annabruegel4343
    @annabruegel4343 4 года назад +2

    ❤️❤️

  • @carmenmorris580
    @carmenmorris580 4 года назад +3

    I may or may not have a crush on Michael 😂 not gonna lie

  • @bbabybaby143
    @bbabybaby143 4 года назад +1

    What are yalls enneagram number?!! It’s like a personality test but wayy more accurate and based off the Bible and each type has a major sin. Please take it haha.

  • @picturetaker607
    @picturetaker607 4 года назад +1

    I found the BBC reading of "Sexual Morality" by CS Lewis , (This became Chapter 5 of Book 3, in the book called ‘Mere Christianity’. ) Very interesting an informative. It can be seen here: ruclips.net/video/-RkZXZx6HCI/видео.html

  • @WhaZooo
    @WhaZooo 4 года назад +5

    Im never going to find some 1 in Miami this city is the opposite of that lol

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +1

      Lol it may be hard but I bet they’re out there! :)

    • @righteousfroce1254
      @righteousfroce1254 4 года назад

      My parents are from Miami. I want nothing to do with it

    • @mrsrezich
      @mrsrezich 4 года назад

      Just a question....who is Micheal?

  • @1dionysos606
    @1dionysos606 4 года назад +2

    About 90% of good things that happened to me has happened after 9 pm.

  • @itskayleemichelle3995
    @itskayleemichelle3995 4 года назад +2

    I’m a Christian and I know I am not impure for having sex. I am with one person, and our intent and end goal is marriage. My body is not less Christ like just because I use my body in that way. Christians almost idolize purity and it’s kind of gross in all honesty.

  • @livingunashamed4869
    @livingunashamed4869 4 года назад +7

    I'm more on the wait till marriage to kiss side. Until you're married that person is just another brother or sister in Christ treat them as such. Don't do anything you'd wouldn't do with a blood sibling. Much sweeter to wait.

    • @PaulandMorgan
      @PaulandMorgan  4 года назад +2

      There’s wisdom in that bro, thanks for sharing🙏

    • @joebillage3578
      @joebillage3578 3 года назад

      Dumb as hell advice. You are not siblings, you are romantic partners.

  • @anastasiyarakova8517
    @anastasiyarakova8517 4 года назад

    I think a lot of it is individual. My last bf and I dated for 7 months and we havent slept together even though we have done other things. Which was new for both of us and it has been extremely rewarding (he isnt a Christian). We knew we wanted to get married 2 weeks in. It is based on emotional maturity and respect and we were happy where we were. So stopping at a certain point is totally possible and I dont regret anything. We arent hormonal teenagers who cant control ourselves. Sorry that you guys didnt experience this and lived with fear.
    Also, even as a married couple, no one is obligated to give the other person sex. You feel uncomfortable because you were manipulated into this scare tactic that anything sexual before marriage (which not everyone wants) is terrible and you are going to hell.

  • @Adam-tx1tr
    @Adam-tx1tr 4 года назад

    The devil is under your bed

  • @sedricgranger
    @sedricgranger 4 года назад +4

    I want everyone in the chat to keep in mind that everyone’s different, people have different beliefs, faiths, and opinions. You have the free will to choose your path. Instead of ridiculing people for their choices. You can give your opinion in a way that doesn’t bring people down but causes people to think. People need to learn how to discuss 🤔 maybe that would be an interesting video topic. How to discuss with non Christians or address the people who hate on your content

    • @Ashterial
      @Ashterial 4 года назад

      I definitely don't agree with anything that they say I just wish they did it a little kinder when they would say their opinion. They make people feel shame if they choose to kiss, or have sex before marriage and make people fear that they are going to go to hell. I was married to a man who was a christian and I had to actually fake my religion and went through so much pain and gas lighting to be with him because he didn't want to be with someone who wasn't a christian. People should love one another no matter their beliefs and not try to convert someone.

    • @forestdaydreams9447
      @forestdaydreams9447 4 года назад

      Sure, but this is a Christian page and therefore will talk about Christian beliefs and practices as the posters see fit.
      Do you go on to Jewish and Muslim pages and insist they should water down their beliefs to accommodate people who aren't Jewish and Muslim? I doubt it.

    • @forestdaydreams9447
      @forestdaydreams9447 4 года назад

      @@Ashterial I have allot of sympathy for what must have been a hard situation, but do you not see it as a little unfair that you are projecting on to Christianity what was, after all, a decision that you yourself made?
      You and your ex hubby should have broken up the second you realised you had incompatible beliefs, but the fact that you didn't is not a sign that Christianity is wrong to preach that Christians should not marry non believers. In fact, it's a living testament to it.

  • @amyhdez3634
    @amyhdez3634 4 года назад

    Really curious, why is wearing pants? I thought they were Christian super curious btw

  • @develishcat5473
    @develishcat5473 4 года назад +8

    HAHAHA arent they so hypokritical? i mean they give this tiny hints of not being able to supress their (by the way natural and totally okay)sexually urges but they tell other, they should.

    • @paramorerockenroll
      @paramorerockenroll 4 года назад

      So true

    • @sedricgranger
      @sedricgranger 4 года назад +3

      People just choose to live their lives in certain ways. Everyone has the right to live their lives in the way they want.

    • @Goat.Cheese
      @Goat.Cheese 4 года назад +2

      You spelled hypocritical wrong

    • @develishcat5473
      @develishcat5473 4 года назад

      @@Goat.Cheese maybe and thats totally okay because its not my first Language. Whats your point here? Besides being boring.

  • @dominiquejohnson8690
    @dominiquejohnson8690 4 года назад +12

    🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

  • @opheliawherever
    @opheliawherever 4 года назад +4

    Whatever you're uncomfortable with. You guys are so annoying.

    • @forestdaydreams9447
      @forestdaydreams9447 4 года назад +2

      If they're annoying, why are you here watching their videos?