My parents. I've confronted them about some of these things they have done to me when I was younger. They said that I should just forget about it and move on....
“Mom, i feel (insert feeling)” “u kNow hOW mANy SacRIfiCEs i MaDE hAVe yoU evEr cOnSiDereD hOW i FeEL I hAVe dONE sO mAny-“ i don’t think i want to continue a 2 hour speech
fr, ill try to talk to them in a civil way and then they turn the tables and say everything i do wrong and then I try to say sum back and then they ground me....
Psalm 118:17 I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord. Matthew 7:6 Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces. Job 39:13 The wings of the ostrich flap joyfully.. she lays her eggs on the ground, unmindful that a foot may crush them. She treats her young harshly as if they were not hers for God did not endow her with wisdom or give her a share of good sense. Yet when she spreads her feathers to run, she laughs at horse and rider. Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. Revelation 21:8 But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars-they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death. 2 Samuel 12:15-22 David prayed to God for the sick baby. David fasted and refused to get up or eat. On the seventh day the baby died. Then David went into the Lord’s house to worship. After that he ate. "But now that the baby is dead, I can’t bring him back to life. Someday I will go to him, but he cannot come back to me.” Numbers 20:15 Our ancestors went down into Egypt, and we lived there many years. The Egyptians mistreated us and our ancestors, but when we cried out to the Lord, he heard our cry and sent an angel and brought us out of Egypt. Job 8:7 Although your beginnings were small, your future will be very great indeed. Revelation 21:4 "And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
Too true. I'm turning 18, and I don't even know how to function as an adult. They expect me to be some successful rich guy, but I don't even know how to prepare my own food (other than microwave), because they always say "let me handle it" or "focus on your studies." I'm also very timid after years upon years of them enforcing their authority over my whole life; for example, I always have a little trauma around the word "sequester," and I don't like hearing or saying it because of how many things and activities have been taken away from me under the command of this word. Because of this, I never bother to push asking them. I never even ask for stuff anymore if it costs money, because I know they'll say "you should be grateful that we bought all this stuff for you" and then subsequently make me feel like shit. The college I'm going to isn't even out of city, and my parents refuse to pay for a dorm or the like, since the campus is only 15 minutes from my house. I wish I had more of a backbone when choosing colleges, but it's their money or whatever. I really don't want to live anymore. I don't necessarily want to die, but I can't stand never having my own independence and accomplishing my own goals. Any goals I accomplish is always in gratitude to my parents; I hate myself because of this, and my self-esteem is laughable. My dad told me that he didn't get to move out until 30, so why should I expect different. Great, it's good to know that I'll be wasting my prime years doing Bible studies in my parent's house, and buying them cruise ship tickets with my money. I'm sorry this was long. I don't want to live. My only aspiration is to run away to Belgium and pay for a euthanasia session. I want to kill myself. Apparently, mental diseases don't exist, because I'm just being moody and unfaithful to their god. I want to die. I'll never be happy. I'll waste my life. I wish someone would stick a 6mm piece of lead in my cranium. I hate my life, and I hate myself. Thanks mom, dad, and step-dad.
@@ianmillado1810 hey hey you don't have ti be sorry for anything, ok? You're a great son and its honestly your parents loss if they cant see your worth. This is gonna sound very cliche, but it is gonna get better. I know its hard, but im so proud at how far you have come; just hold on a lil longer. And please please PLEASE do not try to kill yourself, you're so much better than that. You're a fighter and you're gonna make it through, I am absolutely sure about it. And why don't you try making some friends at uni? I know making friends is hard, but you have to learn how to be confident and know how to approach people, in order to learn new things in life. Please do not give up, you're so young, you have an entire life ahead of you. Believe me, when i say that you're loved. I have been in your place, I know how it feels.
@@snigdha2901 thanks for the encouragement. I wish that my parents weren't so broken that they have to take it out on me, and I wish I had a normal family life. And am I really that okay? I doubt if I even know anything at all, since my mom loved to debate every little detail of my life until I had no choice but to shut up and do what she says 'cause she said so. I'll try to hold on, but I keep dipping into feeling like crap. Nonetheless, I'm happy that you have faith in me. I hope I can make friends in the future, and I'll definitely give it my best; however, I'm just really stressed over the lockdown scenario, especially since my first semester of college life will be spent in my lonely, depressing room. It's really tough not having anyone to care about me (except my parents, but for their own reasons rather than my own). I really do want to believe that everything will turn out fine, and I hope it will. I'm just beginning to lose hope. Will I really feel this trapped forever? I just want to run away from it all, and start a new life. Too bad I made bad life choices, and am now stuck living with my folks for another 4 wretched years. I really hope I don't spend my life depressed. Damn, I hate feeling like this. I just want friends who won't treat me like my parents do. I just want to live my own life. Is it really that much to ask? I don't even feel like I deserve it. I don't know. What do I know? I just want someone to tell me it's okay, but unfortunately social distancing (which is important) is a thing. I hate being lonely. I want to see real people again. Thank you for reading my sob story. It really does mean a lot. The Internet is really the only place I get to be honest without worrying about people persecuting me for feeling these things. I hope you have a nice day, and I hope you stay safe! Thanks again :-)
Ian Millado I'm so sorry, now I feel lucky that my parents are loving but slightly agressive. Please, you have my blessings and I hope that you will start a new and better life once you earn money and can support yourself.
@@user-de5pl9vo3g Thank you so much for the sympathy and support. I really appreciate it. One day, hopefully, I'll be able to start again, on my own. I just hope that I'll be able to keep myself together until then. I hope you and your family are doing okay during these times. Thanks again for reading my little essay. It means a lot.
Well that really depends who you tell, especially if you have evidence such as texts, recorded conversations, videos, etc.. This video does suggest telling a teacher, counselor or administrator. Someone who will listen and accept the truth.
Whenever I try to talk to them they get mad at me and I cry cause they don't understand and they say I'm being unreasonable. I've been through so much emotional abuse that I just resort to crying. It's hard to explain how I get mad but also sad at the same time.
It’s so ironic how I’m 13 years old and I have to handle every fight with my mother like an adult, meanwhile she still acts like a stupid immature teenager.
We grow up in dysfunctional families and have to spend the rest of our lives trying to analyze what happened and heal ourselves. Meantime, we are expected to have and raise our own healthy kids!
That’s true. I didn’t start trying to heal myself until recently. I think I did pretty well raising my 3 children after my husband died. From the very beginning I kept in mind what my mother did to me and how I turned out and did the opposite. For example, I was told I was worthless, stupid and similar things sometimes because I would have an epileptic seizure and whatever she told me I had no memory of. When my kids were growing up, I always told them they were smart, they actually are thanks to their daddy’s genes. I encouraged them to try to do whatever interested them. When my mother was around she told me I was giving them a big head. I was fine with that. Thankfully, I didn’t pass down what she did to me. In fact, my older son told me she has gaslighted me my whole life. She did a lot of the other stuff listed, but that was the major one. Maybe, since I actually have a word for what she still does to me, I can work through this. The first thing was to cut contact with her. A birthday and Christmas card that’s all.
whenever I stand up for myself to my parents they ask me “what is wrong with you?” because they have so many expectations and rules. I’ve been threatened by my parents multiple times because I said “no” (once my mom said I may not have a place to sleep tomorrow) it’s sad cause I’m still a child
Me: hey mom I think i might have a pretty bad paranoia problem cuz i feel like im being watched all the time and that im being stalked Mother: oh everyone feels like that its normal stop adking for a therapist
it doesn't mean directly like "no back off!" but doing it in a more long term way, starting like telling them you're not interested in what they propose you and prosoing something that you like more etc.
Psalm 118:17 I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord. Matthew 7:6 Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces. Job 39:13 The wings of the ostrich flap joyfully.. she lays her eggs on the ground, unmindful that a foot may crush them. She treats her young harshly as if they were not hers for God did not endow her with wisdom or give her a share of good sense. Yet when she spreads her feathers to run, she laughs at horse and rider. Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. Revelation 21:8 But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars-they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death. 2 Samuel 12:15-22 David prayed to God for the sick baby. David fasted and refused to get up or eat. On the seventh day the baby died. Then David went into the Lord’s house to worship. After that he ate. "But now that the baby is dead, I can’t bring him back to life. Someday I will go to him, but he cannot come back to me.” Numbers 20:15 Our ancestors went down into Egypt, and we lived there many years. The Egyptians mistreated us and our ancestors, but when we cried out to the Lord, he heard our cry and sent an angel and brought us out of Egypt. Job 8:7 Although your beginnings were small, your future will be very great indeed. Revelation 21:4 "And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
If you really cry for a scream then i have no words. I got stuck in my room for 2days without my phone/pc/tv/ps4/can go out with freinds and stuff they were relly toxic So when am playing a game online she just walk in my room saying am cleaning the bed and then just come and scream in my mic while am like 12-15people on discords call and then when i tell her to leave she just yell more so i have to say like: the fuck out or smh so she leaves and play the victim. The best thing to do is just ignore them of course they will take your stuff but let them feel that you dont need them if they are really toxic. And when you hit 18 just get out of there buddy
Same here.. even my mother doesn't like me anymore :( just because having depressed (mum thought it was her fault making me depressed :( ) Now I don't ever call " mother " anymore
Anime Lover i mean meh. i think if your parent has the awareness that you know whats going on, they’ll threaten you at some point and claim they’re better than any other bad situation you could be in. honestly, wish i did report it.
I’ve called out my parents about their manipulation and verbal abuse toward me numerous times when I was younger and they always claimed they would work on fixing it but they never did. They would always go back to what they did after about a week or so of me confronting them. One day I had enough of their bullshit. I exploded in rage on my father by choking him out and I haven’t seen or spoken to my parents in 8 years. In those 8 years I’ve felt a tremendous weight lifted off of me and I’ve never felt better. I’m now married to the most beautiful woman in the world and we have two wonderful sons together who absolutely adore us. I promise to never put my sons through what I went through. I will break this cycle
I’ll respect your decision about not wanting kids because of your parents because I’m like you in this case too, but. Being aware is good, because you can do and be things your parents weren’t to you. You can avoid and not do all of the things your parents have done to you....
I got 7 out of 10. I've struggled with narcissistic abuse, manipulation, and gaslighting. My dad, auntie, older sister, and 2 cousins. It's cruel of what they did to me. I feel sorry for others who also been through the same thing I've been through. Please hang in there and stay strong.
@@titam.5509 Well, at least now we know theres someone else going thru it too, and that we ain't alone😊. although I wish it was just me,I hate that others go through this.
My Parents r the same. They ACTUALLY love me, but my dad(He had a rough relationship w/ his familly) had abousive tendencys, but with genuinely good intentions. My mom had the memory span of a goldfish(This got me in more trouble than i care to know).She was a good person though i think.
the only way to deal with this is to move out, find a job, in extreme cases go live in another country, find hobbies you enjoy that can easily be done in another place. stick to it, life doesn't have to be like this
Brodie Goat SO RELATABLE! My dad interrupts me all the time and gets mad when I point it out, but when I interrupt he gets mad. His anger problems seem to be getting a bit better though, and I go to school now (I was homeschooled) so now I’m not near him as much.
@@androidbutterscotchkitty I'm homeschooled too but they're planning on open university after college which I don't like because it's the same thing as homeschooling, and I wanted to get away from them and stay-in with my brother and his fiancee.
@@guest-jz4ux This is a good time to try to prepare yourself for when you CAN get out. You are aware of the things your parents are doing, and want to be better. This is a good time to delve into some personal research (like the video above) and using the internet to further your learning and connections with people you can't do in person. The internet offers a sort of anonymity, and you can learn about how other people have dealt with it, and learn skills and resources that you can start now and ones you have to wait for once you reach independence. Just, of course, use the anonymity to your advantage to protect your identity, and be careful of the sorts of people, resources, forums, etc., that you may encounter.
"tell them to back off" one question : how am i supposed to do that without being called disrespectful, might die, being kicked out of the house or being insulted 24 hours?
Ah I know how to counter that: get kicked out and get yourself like in the hospital (no serious injury just like think of something small like you just got tackled by a random guy and you just wanna get checked out) and they will most likely be like “oh no we won’t do that again” it might work just you don’t need to do this but if u found a way good luck homie
Yeah, me too. Because its been etched into our subconscious. And whether we like it or not, we'll imitate them without even us realizing. Sad truth. Without undergoing proper healing, that would be us in the future.
I am afraid of being lik them too that's why when ever I see good parents or adivces on how to be a better parent I try to learn it's hard but we can fight the fear and be better than them
@@Asiagirl644 I seriously have done everything I can to get the means to move out and am doing so. It's so awkward at home waiting for the lease to start..
I am already 28 and she is financially controlling me and she sabotages my opportunity making some money. What should I do? I don’t want to be a Bad man :’(
I hope that’s not a lie because for years I’ve been telling myself that it’s only X more years until I can leave this house and my family that has been terrible to each other. I’ve been through some really traumatic experiences due to my family’s choices, and my mom will not let me handle anything on my own to the point where she has to be everywhere that I am. She goes to football games and watches my marching band play but I know what she will just try and find something else to use as leverage when I get an 89 on an assignment. She is the worst about being controlling. She says that she is trying to be less of a puppet master, but that is the stinkiest load of bullshit I’ve ever smelled. I’m just so done with her and my family as a whole...
@@uvn6210find some one to share a place. Took me 23 years and be on quarentine to notice all the manipulations, is f#ing scary when you do it but it's woth it.
Last time I told my mom that I had boundaries she laughed and said “ha what boundaries” As if it was outrageous for me to have any. Recently I been taking care of her after she got a major surgery and when I broke down and vented about how I have no help she huffed with a smirk and said “that’s life” something I would never say to someone who is venting. She never takes responsibility for any of her actions. I’m always made out to be the bad person. It’s so tiring
Psalm 118:17 I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord. Matthew 7:6 Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces. Job 39:13 The wings of the ostrich flap joyfully.. she lays her eggs on the ground, unmindful that a foot may crush them. She treats her young harshly as if they were not hers for God did not endow her with wisdom or give her a share of good sense. Yet when she spreads her feathers to run, she laughs at horse and rider. Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. Revelation 21:8 But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars-they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death. 2 Samuel 12:15-22 David prayed to God for the sick baby. David fasted and refused to get up or eat. On the seventh day the baby died. Then David went into the Lord’s house to worship. After that he ate. "But now that the baby is dead, I can’t bring him back to life. Someday I will go to him, but he cannot come back to me.” Numbers 20:15 Our ancestors went down into Egypt, and we lived there many years. The Egyptians mistreated us and our ancestors, but when we cried out to the Lord, he heard our cry and sent an angel and brought us out of Egypt. Job 8:7 Although your beginnings were small, your future will be very great indeed. Revelation 21:4 "And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
@@imaphoenix1 Thank you. Yeah, that's super dismissive. I can't picture saying to a friend "that's life" sure, it is. But not quite the supportive words. I am sorry too, I hope she validates your feelings.
My adult life is a wreck because of my manipulative mother. Do. Not. Be. Like. Me. Don't be afraid to be yourself, try new things, or go outside your comfort zone. That's how you grow, and become yourself.
Blade4952 my parents say that but when I am trying to be myself they always stop me from doing it. For example I try new clothes that I actually like and they start saying “those are boys clothes” “you look fat/skinny or that” “you look like a boy, you are a girl you can’t wear boy clothes” and I always thought that they were trying to help me and that u was being emotional. But when I saw this video I was shook because I relate to everything on this video. Now I know that I need to defend myself but when I do they always blame it on me or they just act like they are being the victim or they will just call me disrespectful and that I am being a brat and start calling me names. Now I just don’t really fight with them neither show my emotions.
I finally told my mother about how she made me feel as a child growing up. Now she keeps saying, "since I'm a horrible mother." I struggle everyday trying to be okay with myself without worrying about whether she approves or not. I honestly don't care anymore because no matter what I say or do she will feel what she wants versus hearing me out.
@@chrislinnd I'm so sorry to hear that! Just remember, that they do not own you, and this is your life, not theirs. It's okay to listen to our parents, as they have experience we have yet to accumulate; however, it is important to remember, that they are just people too. And sometimes they are wrong. My advice is, that when they are not around you, try not to think "What would my parents think of me?". Be safe, but get outside that comfort zone every once and awhile, and live your life. Wishing you the best!
@@underthepalmtree My mother says the exact same thing after I finally stood my ground a couple years back, and told her how abusive she was to me when I was growing up. I just ignore those remarks now, tuned them out. I am sorry to hear you are going through this too, but just know that you are valuable, and uniquely you. Your mom does not own you, and does not control your thoughts. Those are yours, and yours alone.
Same! like my dad I was suppose to get a job and my dad is always like oh your not ready you have to let me do it I'm like WHAT?! let me do what I have to do before I wouldnt understand how to do it my damn self then I'll be fucking homeless and not never get and job and take care of myself and I always feel like I have to stay home everyday and not do nothing with my life like let me live!!
@@somefatkid2080 me too, i think my parents are the reason why i have social anxiety and depression until now. it starts to developed when i was 10-12. it gets worst in high school, since i got bullied a lot. and ofc my parents never did anything to help me with it.. now here i am, suffering.
Whenever I have a problem, my mom twists it around to make it about herself and it’s gotten to the point where I can’t talk to her about my problems anymore
me: *Stands up for myself* Parents: *Beats me. shouts at me and carries on threatening me* Sometimes it's hard to stand up to manipulative and emotionally abusive parents. Especially when no one believes you or doesn't want to know OR where the parents spin the story to make out that YOU'RE the problem.
That’s definitely mine. Just turned 21 today, but I have tons of homework to do and an exam to study for, and wasn’t 100% ready for celebrating my birthday today (I’m in a community college & have no dorm btw). But my parents forced me to celebrate it immediately when I got home, made me “smile for the camera” (I don’t smile too well with teeth open often btw, I’m not as good as the celebrities); and when I didn’t get a “pretty pic” they’d redo it too many times. They even attempted to tickle me like a freakin toddler! And when I told them to please calm down and let me breathe and have my cake, they went completely insane, screamed at me calling me “ungrateful”, “disrespectful”, and “selfish”, and stressed me out on my 21st birthday. They thought I was pressuring myself, (especially when I told them that I HAD a test to study for because they’d ALSO piss all over me if I just happened to not make the grade) despite the fact that THEY were the ones making me feel uncomfortable. (my mom even threatened cancelling all other birthday celebration plans I had for the weekend because of just ONE day of getting serious with assignments; ONE, UNBELIEVABLE) Sadly, you just can’t reason with such parents because they will always spin it off of their own miserable lives & point the finger at YOU no matter what. And I just can’t surrender to mine any longer. I can’t wait to get outta the house, live in a dorm on university campus, and move to a new state. I do infact care about others btw, but it’s matipulative people (whether they’re parents, teachers, neighbors, or significant others) that make me and everyone else in such “relationships” want to just live for ourselves, for real! Btw, my parents don’t even get along with each other either & many other family members of mine don’t seem to act normal either (another significant sign you’re in a toxic relationship; your family’s lives might not be as “perfect” as the story that their selling you).
This is my mom. I use age regression as a coping mechanism all her reasearch went towards her point. She said she wants me grow up and that normal people don’t do this and that it’s not normal.
My parents: "manipulate me and emotionally abuse me" Me: "develops antisocial personality disorder" My parents: "omg you are so cruel we didn't teach you this"
Nevermore 721 SAME SAME SAME “I don’t know where this came from, it couldn’t have been from our house. We’ve been supportive of you, we’ve given you a roof over your head and food to eat and water to drink and clothes to wear and a school to go to... so obviously you have loving parents, why are you developing these issues?!” they understand nothing sometimes...
OMG RELATE!! I have depression and anxiety and my mum is like THIS ISNT FAIR YOURE HURTING ME WITH YOUR FAKE ILLNESSES (i’ve been diagnosed by a doctor and on medication). If i cut or talk about suicidal feelings I get YOU’RE SO SELFISH WHAT DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO?! (I dont really talk about how i feel anymore)
My mom is obsessed with me being with her, wants to know a lot about my life and uses guilt tripping. It is just so overwhelming, I feel cornered and when I am not with her she makes herself the victim.
@@rayx1679 you a re gonna make it we are all part of the club, besides some unsolicited advice is that is still family so even whe u leave they r gonna be part of your life so try to practice deattachemt from their options and behaviours even if u want to prove yourself. It takes time is a bumpy road.
My mom just uses her love and what she does for me to guilt trip me. She makes everything about her, and everytime i try to tell her how i feel about what she does, she just makes it about herself and how SHE'S feeling. She's threatening to send me to Boarding School.
*BEWARE of parents who want to live their lives and fulfil their dreams through you* - Threatening with disowning or other dire consequences if you don’t attend the university of their choice - Being extra nice to you during some specific occasion, just to have it as a weapon in the future, to remind you - Telling you lies about something that you have been asking for a long time, just so you can keep obeying (watch their actions)
My mother wanted to give me a special gift for my birthday. She told me: "we can travel where you want, but we can't travel to the US or Europe" So, I asked for a drawing tablet. She said: "we can't afford that" So... She said "how about we throw a party? A big party with all your friends, and family, and a lot of reggaetton" I was dissappointed. Why? Becaude I hate parties, and I have... What, 3 friends? I hate reggaeton and I prefer bedroom pop. We ended up throwing the party. Long story short, I cried all night. Why? Becaude it was horrible. She gave me this ridiculous pink dress allthough she knew that I hate pink. No one gave me ANY respect at all. My parents were no where to be found at the party, and my classmates were rude to me. I was scared. Is this a manipulative Mother? Or she just wants to see her frustrated dreams come true, but with her daughter?
@@StinkyBumblebeeGamer I would say this is manipulative parenting. There are questions that come to mind though. How is your relationship with your parents? Are you open with them and freely express your feelings of concern about anything? Or do you tend to bottle it up because you feel as though asking would be a bother? I do also find it rather disrespectful of your mother to buy you something she should KNOW you don't like. To me there could be nothing more insulting on my birthday, even more than not getting a gift at all. I would possibly try to express your resentment towards the gift. Ask something like if you could possibly exchange it for something else. If they ask why just express that you don't like the color/design or whatever else you don't like about it. They may get offended and simply try to express it's not that you don't appreciate the thought, but rather it was merely something that isn't your style. Anything much further to press you to keep the clothing or expressing at how they work SO hard to get things for you and support you, this is manipulative and downright abusive. Go ahead and shoot me a message sometime if you have any questions or would like me to explain something further. I always enjoy helping in these situations.
I remember my mom told me that she would make me live with my grandparents if I don't do something I don't remember... I remember this other time my mom almost kicked my older sister out the house and she didn't nothing wrong and she asked why she was crying (because you're disowning her duh) and she said she didn't do anything or say anything about her or God and she stopped. This scares me a lot my older sister could've almost been kicked out the house for nothing and she wasn't even close to 18 and I think kicking kids out under age of 18 is child endangerment
A3Ris Cake_124 same, my mom keeps telling me I’m faking it to get attention or that crying is weakness. It’s not, hell, it’s the opposite; it’s strength (unless if you’re _really_ faking it, but you still can’t jump to conclusions too soon if someone cries). As another quote says “Crying doesn’t make you weak. It means you’ve been strong for too long”. Plus, we’re all imperfect, at some point in our lives, we shed tears, and that’s okay. Just always remember to get back up on your feet, and have high hopes :)
this gives me relief that i’m not the dramatic one because i express how i feel… does anyone else’s parents claim they’re always right because they’re the “parents”
“Are you being abused by your parents?” More like waking up everyday and going to war. My parents are really toxic. I just feel like giving up all together.
Yeah at one point of time you feel that but the next moment you feel guilty for even thinking about it and now it's your fault and your parents are victims again.
This happen to me all the time until I start say no or do different time. It was hard at first. Just say I have things to do. They might still get angry or keep asking. Stand your ground and say "no".
My parent has a lack of trust for me, they seem to leverage the fact that “Im not responsible enough” to never let me leave even thought I will be able to drive in about a month. I get they’re trying to protect me, but I can’t even go to the park without telling them. Then proceed to say I’m disrespecting them for showing them how much they don’t trust me and say that I hurt them, and after that, listen to me profusely apologize.
Dew F Most definitely. She just did it now and asked what I was doing and it makes me feel guilty for nothing and I jumped and nervously explained I was doing homework for so and so classes. But idk I feel like she means well but I just want my space you know?
Dealing with parents like this is seriously one of the most mentally and physically exhausting things that someone can go through. I am mentally and physically sick, literally sick because of my parents. And I know that there is nobody to reach out to, as they will always find a way to make me look like the person in the wrong to others. Who else
My legal guardian has done the same to me to the point where I'm seen as just another "moody,rebellious teenager when I just need some help to get out. I'm sorry this is happening to you, and I hope things get better❤💯
@@webcomiclulu9056 wish I could, I'm pretty sure they are gonna try to take everything from me. They made me codependent. Like they have complete financial control. I have no jobs in my area. I live in the country. I can't wear what they don't like. I can't go anywhere without checking in ever 5 minutes to an hour to make sure I'm at where I said I'm at. I've never lied to them about where I'm at. If I say certain things she gets mad and really mean or she completely stops talking to me and ignores me. I hope you are able to move out asap.
Alwkjs a dude same, my heart just dropped at the end of the video, I don’t want to think of my mother badly, but most of this is what my mom does, I don’t even think she realizes it
My mom told me I’m being “dramatic”/ “a drama queen” while I was having a nervous breakdown and about to pass out because of frustration due to her pushing me emotionally lol
Same here I was expressing my feelings to her and had one of the biggest mental breakdowns ever and she threatened to call the office on me if I didn’t shut up it hurt bad.
i wass having also a nerovous breakdown, and i told em i just wanna have a bit of space, but they keep pressuring me, speaking fake facts and saying that if i dont stop, they will gonna call the ambulance, then he started to beat me.
You forgot emotional manipulation and emotional blackmail. The art of "I raised this for 18 years and now this raises me for the rest of my life" Also, how some parents make their children feel guilty by using pity. Also, how religion is used against you because "Mother's are sacred".
Just advice, but look at it from the other person's perspective and you just might get a better understanding of this sort of overtly clingy love. Try loving them back as appreciation for raising you, not as a burden, and you might see some improvements in both you and your parents' behaviour.
Agree 100%!! Like your actual mental health is below that stupid thought that family has to be together no matter what just because of a fucking bloodline
Its hard when you realise how messed up your parents where. Yes they were trying to make good decisions for you but those decisions has never onced made you happy. Its hard when you realise your parents had their own tramas but they always fail to acknowledge it. Standing up for yourself seem toxic for them when they have never seen your side of the world
There is also "dehumanization " that some parents resort to. I don't know how many people have this issue but, it's like : 1. Your not allowed to be mad, upset, etc. For example, mad = you get yelled at, sad = you get made fun of, etc. It's fine for them to be upset and they can call you whatever they want but, if you do then your being negative and a brat. 2. They constantly get upset at any mistakes you made. Wether it's big or small, ignorance or not. It gets turned into a screaming match where they always win. They can put blackmail like, threatening to record you getting angry and posting it on facebook, taking pictures of you doing something and posting it online, phoning a close friend or relative by letting them lie and make you look bad, etc. It makes you feel small and weak. 3. They will always play the victim. In every single argument they find some way to blame you and hold almost everything against you. Basically they demonize you. They make you seem like your the devil himself to others but, make you seem good when they decide you should be forgiven. 4. It's impossible to tell them any kind of mental health related issue for fear of being mocked, disowned or worse. For example, I'm more of an introvert and have possible anxiety because of my past and, my mom's boyfriend will say things like, "You can't even interact normally, ooh is your anxiety going off!?" Or "You wonder why no one likes you, your not normal". I think you can tell they are more extroverted. 5. They are practically bullies in sheep's clothing. Hurting you if they think you annoy them, mocking your interests and hobbies, telling lies about you, etc. Also, any friends you make they will try to turn them against you. Also, your grades are never good enough to them like, " Oh you have a 95% in English? Well you could of done better.". 6. Your forced to relay on them so they are in a position of power. By not letting you get a job while in school, not allowing you to make decisions on your own, etc. I could write more but these are the main issues I have. I'm not sure if I did just list down manipulation but, a little more extreme. Anyways, thanks for reading. I hope you have a great day/night. Edit : It's only been 24 hours and, I can't believe how many people relate to this. I truly am sorry for all you who have to suffer like this. It's a shame that abuse is normalize nowadays. I pray from the bottom of my heart that things get better for all of you, and you get to be happy once again.
@@idekanymore8361 I'm so sorry to hear that, I understand what that feels like. Nobody who has a mental illness, confirmed or not, deserves that. I think it's amazing that you want to get diagnosed, even if your unsure about it. Just try to hang in there until you can move. If you need to, try to go on walks or be out of the house more often, to get away for a bit. It might be hard but, I do promise things will get better if you keep trying to move forward. Also, if her mocking gets worse ,try to find a safe place to stay until you can fully move out, either with a friend, family or shelter. It takes a lot of strength to admit something is not okay and your very brave for commenting. I hope things get better for you in the future and wish you the best of luck. I hope I managed to help you in some way. I'm open to talking if you need to. Have a great day.
FrostenShadows Oh, I go through that. Every single one. I know how you feel. I hope there’s a light at the end of the tunnel for everyone like us, and I pray this growing generation can, I don’t know, ACTUALLY TRY to understand and love their children when the time comes.
@@sophiaredwood5825 Yea, I totally agree with you. It's really sad that being used is a reality for almost everyone in our generation. I'm sorry you and plenty of others have to go through this as well. I look forward to see how our generation grows. I feel as if there is plenty of hope left so, we can leave behind the abusive and belittling reality the older generation forced onto us. The only thing everyone can do is be kind to each other, to show everyone that there is still good people left that can help make the future better. Not just for us but, for the younger generations aswell. I apologize for ranting however, I hope everyone can learn that the dark is only scary until, you find the courage to turn on the light.
My mum does all these. I repress all my emotions and refuse to talk about my mental health to anyone because mum gets really mad and yells at me. Usually calls me selfish.
@@rainbowrocketwolf2268 I'm really sorry to hear that. It's a sucky situation to be in and nobody deserves to have to suffer all alone. If you can, try distancing yourself from her like, taking walks, doing things you like more, etc. Your pretty strong for putting up with all of it. For talking about your mental health, if there's no one to talk to it about, try venting to stuffed animals or figurines. It sounds silly but sometimes it can help, at least a little since they can't have an opinion on anything. I hope things get better for you soon. Have a great day.
I guess that's why, when a mother kills her kids, justice treats her as if she's the victim (it happened recently, a mother who kept her daughter in a car trunk for two years - I kid you not. You can guess the consequence of such treatment. The court tried to find a,ny way to let her get scot free and the daughter's lawyer, exasperated, had to remind them who the victim was here…
1. They compare you to siblings, relatives or friends. 2. They raise you to be codependent. 3. They constantly guilt trip you. 4. They set unrealistic expectations. 5. They make everything about them. 6. They intimidate you with cruel tactics. 7. They treat you more like an object. 8. They gaslight you. 9. They don't respect your boundaries. 10. They fail to provide you with unconditional love.
this is everything my mom is. I don't like my mom so much to the point where i respect my cheating dad more. At least my dad actually loves me. I'm glad they split
kat coal exactly like wtf my parents are so narcissistic and controlling and feel like I have to get permission to even talk to them and when I have a serious conversation with them about my emotions and how they make me feel like I want to literally kurmit suicide and they f•cking just yell at me and use there physical leverage and seniority to make it about them and explain to me how disrespectful that would be and boo hoo them them them them all the time like It gets me so god dam depressed sometimes
Damn I feel this except with my mom... I will be spitting straight facts and think it's disrespect... After a while I try to just stay quiet to avoid a mental breakdown or to have her take away my stuff... There are times to where I wont even be doing anything and she'll just yell at me because she's in a bad mood... When I try and say that she's yelling at me for no reason than she just gets mad...
Music_ Beauty I just avoid my parent tbh, even though we live in the same house I probably only see him once a day. I found the less I interact with him the better. Also with this whole pandemic thing he sometimes gets scared when he thinks I’m sick so thats a pro
2:39 It is nearly impossible to stand on your own ground when parents are the ones who can control you financially. I actually have my life planned beforehand when I was in high school. I wanted to learn video production and start a production company of my own as it is my passion and I catch up fast when it comes to photo editing video editing and after effects. Unfortunately my dad forced me to take on accounting as it is "stable" (but is not my strength or passion). I stood on my own ground, and he says it's either accounting or you'll never get into college. So yes here I am studying things that I don't like, and my dad would blame me if I am underperforming.
Only if you wanna stay that way. Hurts like hell, but the relief when you get away is like learning you can take a deep breath for the first time in your life.
Actually if you dive deep into your self & know your desires & your value &of course want to be a human not be an programmed(even organized) living creature It’s not too late you can live as yourself Don’t forget that”The only one who gonna change you,IS YOU” everything in your life depends on your will. I learned this the hard way
I feel you bro I'm 37 and I feel the same way but I understand what j is saying the problem is, if you don't have any financial help to go to school any good school that is or to get on your feet period it's alot harder to breathe that first breath of freedom but don't worry it will happen for you don't do what I did at 20 and believe my dad's lies of handing his business over to me then sign it to my dick of an uncle who hated my life on his deathbed and get left out in the cold or whatever get a job get someone to help you if you can don't agree to pay rent save up and get out of there you are 20 you still have time if you feel like this now emagine how you'll feel later in life I had nobody to tell me shit I learned this for my self im just now getting used too today's technology and I'm using a 2017 android with my naybers Wi-Fi use only cous this phone has no SIM and my mom hates technology so get yourself together try to get out there
My feelings don't matter. My struggles don't matter. I'm just a puppet... to get what they want. That's why I decided I keep all of my plans to myself and keep my mouth shut.
My Mum: "I hate how negative you are. You should be proud of myself." Also my Mum: "Your so fat. I hate your hair. Your so mean. You used to be so much better when you were young."
Also Parents: How dare you! I don't know how we ended up with such an ungrateful wretch like you! You only get one set of parents! You ought to show a little more gratitude! Can't you see we only want what's best for you!?
And that is why no one understands when you simply don't have any chance. You hear others complaining all the time, and you can't even get in the position to complain. Its frustrating and terrible.
23 years old realizing this about my mom. threatened to call the cops on me when i was 11 years old for lying to her about the fact that i practiced piano that day
Calli my mom takes age and pushes me down with it. “You’re only a teenager, I know what’s better for you, you’re incapable of making decisions and knowing when you’re wrong.” My mom also says that for my age I have no idea what suffering is. She says I’m too young for problems, that I haven’t reached adulthood yet so I have no idea what it means to suffer... Heh... if only....
Neibdgncf Ftgbcgj I’m both sorry and glad if you relate to this, sorry that you have to feel that kind of pain and glad that you know you aren’t alone 💜
Some of this "advice" sounds like an excellent way to get kicked out. Thought I’d update this because after being reminded through notifications lol. I’m in college now so live on my own, it was only ever one parent who was truly toxic to me and the disowned me at about mid November. In the months that followed I went through so much, my depression got truly abysmal and I started failing classes. But then, things started to get better. I had to confront the fact with my heart that that parent was shitty and stop covering up every bad thing they’d done and making excuses. It made me feel so guilty at fist but eventually it did wonders to my emotional well being. I finally saw myself as equal to my peers and people around me, I finally have self confidence that truly comes from a place within, I started seeing a psychiatrist cause it previously wasn’t allowed, and moment by moment I started to see through the manipulation and realize that I truly didn’t deserve it. I feel true relief and happiness for the first time as well as feelings of worth and value I’d never thought I’d be capable of and allowed to have. I feel like I am allowed to exist - to live my life - and that I don’t have to be paying off some constant burden just to be around. The biggest thing I’ve learned is that there are 2 ways to listen to manipulative people - with your ears and with your heart. I know personally how much of a bad idea it may be for minors to confront their parents - that the justice system is broken and can’t do shit; I got my ass beat for perceived eye rolls that I didn’t even do trust me. But you can start doing these things internally. Make a journal of everything that happened or start recording moments to keep in a safe place so every time you almost get tricked by their nice mode you can hold your ground. Don’t internalize their messages, don’t fall for bs like “it’s so hurtful becuase its true.” Track when they break their promises so you have proof to go up against the always honest persona they portray but that feels off. Tell friends who you know won’t snitch so they’ll hold you accountable. Don’t fall for the idea that it’s just you or that another kid would’ve learned quicker and so gotten out of the constant torments. If you find yourself believing that you are just so much worse than everyone else because of bad luck or something - because when you think about it you can’t actually remember doing anything that much worse compared to where you place yourself in society - stop doing that. You are doing better than you realize and you truly truly do not deserve this treatment. Would you take from other people- like if a stranger just started telling you all these things and doing all the things an abusive person has done to you. Let yourself bask in the label that they are indeed abusive - don’t let them buy it off through their nice phases. Revel in calling them a pos, mean, manipulative, a problem etc etc. Whatever they may say to you - it’s not you who made them this way. If there truly was a change compared to anyone else - it’s them realizing they could get away with shit when it came to you. Internalize the message that you DESERVE to be alive and you shouldn’t have to constantly be earning that right. In your head fight back against the messages - don’t let your heart open up to the idea that there’s some truth to what they are saying. You got this. One day you will be free - and it’ll be the best feeling you’ll ever have.
Ahahahah, exactly what happened to me. Two times. But it can be a good thing at the end. You get out of your toxic cage and it's like you can breathe for the first time
Great. Come tell all the runaways living on the street they made great individual choices and are well on the way to a successful and sustainable life among society.
@gameplayz My mom want me to go to therapist bc i am lesbian and i am scered so much. I dont know what to do bc she said that she want to kick me out of house. I am only 15.
@@andjelastojkovic5462 you might as well pack your stuff and leave if your mother want to judge you based on your personal desires, it's best to grab stuff you need to survive and look for a better family that's both mentally and physically good for you although that's just my opinion, BTW you could get your mother in prison if she kicks you out of the house and decides not to take care of you.
andjela stojkovic I know what I say now is a really big step and I don’t expect you to listen to my advice, if I was you I would not go to that „Terapist“ no matter what and if she gets violent towards you call the police and tell them everything that is really hard Ik since you feel like that you can’t do that to your mother but trust me it’s for the best and most importantly be proud of your self I may not know you but from what I read I think that you are a strong person who goes through so much but yet is still strong enough to not give up and asks for advice wich is from what I know something that needs a lot of confidence over all never forget that you are a great person and deserve better
Me: Points out what they are saying is wrong/gives out facts Parents : "HoW DaRe YoU TaLk BaCk To Me?!!?" Like jesus christ. This is exactly what i'm NOT going to do when i have a child..
Literally today my mom acused me of taking up my librians time even tho my mother was the one asking her if she could help me find a book, and she constantly favors my twin sister over me
"Don't talk back to me" actually means "Don't attempt to defend yourself, I am the authority and I will berate you for this thing you may or may not have done"
The amount of times my dad has said “I’m paying for your college” or “I can just stop paying for things” to make me do whatever they ask is crazy. My stepmom plays the victim card every time she can, and then says “You know I’m tough on you and it’s hard for me too” without even trying to fix the problem at hand. It’s literally gotten to the point where I can’t stand next to either of them without wanting to cry. I’ve had times where I burst into tears when I enter their room because I’m so scared that they’ll scream at me and insult me. Thanks for letting me vent out my frustrations, it really helps to know that I shouldn’t treat their behavior as what a parent is.
You'll have your own life one day, pay for your own things, be in charge of your own life - you'll be free. Some adults tend to tell teenagers that being a grown-up is hard and that being a child is easier. Don't listen to them. Sure, it's a challenge, but trust me, it's sooo much better to be an adult, especially for children who come from an abusive or controlling home. You'll be fine, just keep making healthy choices and don't ever give up on yourself. Good luck to you.
The best thing I did having a manipulative mother is leaving home and being independent. My mother tried every manipulative way to make me stay at home i.e. writing me off the will or making me feel guilty if I left home. I would never trade my freedom to go back to the abuse.
Dominic Durant I agree, big picture planning. The younger you are the longer time feels relatively. What age you are in high school feels a certain way and the thought of what life would be doubling that age seems as if it would be a another whole lifetime. Then when you're said age, you look back it doesn't seem as long as it did then. After that think of what life would be doubling that again. Those high school days will seem even shorter of a period experiencing anguish. It's hard to not let your outer world affect you and dictate who you are and what you should do. The first step is to make a solid plan of action. Once that is established, if you can maintain course, things should simply fall into place. Hopefully bringing about a sense of solace. As the light gets bigger as you push ahead the darkness of the past gets smaller. In general life is suffering. As rap artist lil Dicky put it "On Earth we go hard." Try to muster the courage to be brave and you might experience things that you never thought could happen
My parents are asian and show almost all of these signs, I’ve told them that I don’t want to live with them bc they are abusive and now they are trying to be all nice so I won’t tell someone for help. I don’t want to do this anymore but idk what to do 😭
Dad: You and your mom go have a girl time in the bathroom." Me: "The fuck you talking? That's perverted!" Dad: "Well if you learn to use water and clean yourself. . . " (Just because they never see me in the bathroom, they accuse me of not being hygienic. I purposely use the bathroom whenever they aren't aware of it, because they always sneak into the bathroom when I am in the shower. Literally stalking me right outside of the shower. How can they not see that is extremely creepy and perverted.
Indigo Talks bruh so true. My dad does the same thing except when lm in my room, the only chill place that l have. I’m there(cuz lm mostly home alone). And I’m not there like 24/7 l get out as soon as l brush my teeth, take a shower, read. Then l get out. That’s literally all l do and then l got out to the living room. As soon as he comes from work lm in my room, since l know he about to start to annoy me and lm probably recharging yet. And he goes: “ why aren’t you here, get out, GET OUT!!. And let me tell you his voice is so annoying and so is my moms. Look they argue everyday and my mom gets yelled at by him, he tells her some horrible stuff, and lm over here in my room listening to all this. And since my mom is Dominican, she is of course staying with him after he cheated, talked to her like that etc.....since that’s how most girls are cuz of The 💶💸💸... I just wish someone will relate as much. I’m all about hopes.... oh and also (they constantly fat shame me, and so does my sister) I’m also the youngest out of my 2 sisters. Of them is on her 30s and one is 27 bout to be 28 soon 30. And it’s just too much for my poor little brain to handle.
My mom is literally controlling my life like it's HER story and hers only. As someone has told me before, "Your life is like a story, and you're the one writing it, and the people around you collaborate. But beware of abusive people, as they can change the course of your story." I wish I could see them again, since they taught me how to deal with my authoritarian mother and how to follow my authoritative father's helpful advice.
Attention to all replys: I Never had abusive parents,BUT I do wish ALL of you guys good luck in finding a mentally healthy place to live. And that you find people who ACTUALLY care for you. You are able to escape your hell when the time is right. I hope that time is soon.
There's that moment when they guilt trip you, but they call you hypocrite if you call them out or act like you're always blaming them for confrontations. Thus, using guilt tripping to dismiss claims of guilt tripping. "Am I being trolled right now?" is what I would ask if it were someone else.
I want to go to college but my parents are just like: "You going to college???No way,you are going to be failure." Than I say something like: "Yeah,you can predict the future?" My parents: "How are you talking to your mother??"
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Does this remind you of someone? Comment below!
Almost
Yes kinda me
My parents. I've confronted them about some of these things they have done to me when I was younger. They said that I should just forget about it and move on....
Yep especially 8&9
Why does this remind me of my father...?
And my grandpa?
And my... Aunt and uncle?
Freaking god my family is full of manipulative relatives
The worst parts is that my parents don’t realize the damage they’re doing. They think they’re are “protecting” you
LEAH they protect you from those people who are really trying to help you
Exactly
I feel so sad all the time
Cant not agree more
Agreed, they think that they know everything so they don’t even need to think twice about their words and actions
Me: tells my mum how I'm feeling
Mum: somehow manages to turn the whole conversation about her... 🤷🏽♀️
same, looks like this happens a lot parents can be really selfish and push away their child's feeling which is not ok !
yes happens all the time with my dad and step mom
“Mom, i feel (insert feeling)”
“u kNow hOW mANy SacRIfiCEs i MaDE hAVe yoU evEr cOnSiDereD hOW i FeEL I hAVe dONE sO mAny-“
i don’t think i want to continue a 2 hour speech
Same here.....
Same then my mum goes on into saying how I make her feel like a bad parent and so on.... 😞
RIP to every child who ever tried to talk to their parents like they’re a rational adult and change the situation.
I can't agree more. If the child tries to stand up for themselves they might as well pull the pin on a grenade and put it in their pocket.
well today I just done and do that to both of my parents.
well today I just done and do that to both of my parents.
@@tartaglia5596 wruting them down with your handwriting might help you
fr, ill try to talk to them in a civil way and then they turn the tables and say everything i do wrong and then I try to say sum back and then they ground me....
I’m 20 years old and my mom still tries to use the “I’m the parent, therefore I am above you in every way”
Psalm 118:17
I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord.
Matthew 7:6
Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.
Job 39:13
The wings of the ostrich flap joyfully.. she lays her eggs on the ground, unmindful that a foot may crush them. She treats her young harshly as if they were not hers for God did not endow her with wisdom or give her a share of good sense. Yet when she spreads her feathers to run, she laughs at horse and rider.
Colossians 3:21
Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
Revelation 21:8
But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars-they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.
2 Samuel 12:15-22
David prayed to God for the sick baby. David fasted and refused to get up or eat. On the seventh day the baby died. Then David went into the Lord’s house to worship. After that he ate. "But now that the baby is dead, I can’t bring him back to life. Someday I will go to him, but he cannot come back to me.”
Numbers 20:15
Our ancestors went down into Egypt, and we lived there many years. The Egyptians mistreated us and our ancestors, but when we cried out to the Lord, he heard our cry and sent an angel and brought us out of Egypt.
Job 8:7
Although your beginnings were small, your future will be very great indeed.
Revelation 21:4
"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
Then say “Then I won’t be your child anymore so that I won’t have to follow your BS rules anymore.”
"...and God is above you."
Start praying about your situation. Let Him fight your battles for you. 😉
Same here👿😤
@@jdfodio my parents would say "God said to obey parents, so u have to obey me"
And when you try to tell them about the times they've hurt you, their memories magically get all foggy
I know this is an old comment, but YES I can relate to this.
Yes
Or they just say no it's your fault back which I swear my mum says that all the time in our arguments🤦♂️
My mother's memory doesn't get all foggy but she'll say I'm not being a good person if I don't forgive her and let it go
"I did it cuz it was the best for you"
So choking my neck is helpful for me to get good grades? Hmmmm🧐
Parents treat you like a child, then expect you to behave like an adult
Too true. I'm turning 18, and I don't even know how to function as an adult. They expect me to be some successful rich guy, but I don't even know how to prepare my own food (other than microwave), because they always say "let me handle it" or "focus on your studies." I'm also very timid after years upon years of them enforcing their authority over my whole life; for example, I always have a little trauma around the word "sequester," and I don't like hearing or saying it because of how many things and activities have been taken away from me under the command of this word. Because of this, I never bother to push asking them. I never even ask for stuff anymore if it costs money, because I know they'll say "you should be grateful that we bought all this stuff for you" and then subsequently make me feel like shit. The college I'm going to isn't even out of city, and my parents refuse to pay for a dorm or the like, since the campus is only 15 minutes from my house. I wish I had more of a backbone when choosing colleges, but it's their money or whatever.
I really don't want to live anymore. I don't necessarily want to die, but I can't stand never having my own independence and accomplishing my own goals. Any goals I accomplish is always in gratitude to my parents; I hate myself because of this, and my self-esteem is laughable. My dad told me that he didn't get to move out until 30, so why should I expect different. Great, it's good to know that I'll be wasting my prime years doing Bible studies in my parent's house, and buying them cruise ship tickets with my money.
I'm sorry this was long. I don't want to live. My only aspiration is to run away to Belgium and pay for a euthanasia session. I want to kill myself. Apparently, mental diseases don't exist, because I'm just being moody and unfaithful to their god. I want to die. I'll never be happy. I'll waste my life. I wish someone would stick a 6mm piece of lead in my cranium.
I hate my life, and I hate myself. Thanks mom, dad, and step-dad.
@@ianmillado1810 hey hey you don't have ti be sorry for anything, ok? You're a great son and its honestly your parents loss if they cant see your worth. This is gonna sound very cliche, but it is gonna get better. I know its hard, but im so proud at how far you have come; just hold on a lil longer. And please please PLEASE do not try to kill yourself, you're so much better than that. You're a fighter and you're gonna make it through, I am absolutely sure about it. And why don't you try making some friends at uni? I know making friends is hard, but you have to learn how to be confident and know how to approach people, in order to learn new things in life.
Please do not give up, you're so young, you have an entire life ahead of you. Believe me, when i say that you're loved. I have been in your place, I know how it feels.
@@snigdha2901 thanks for the encouragement. I wish that my parents weren't so broken that they have to take it out on me, and I wish I had a normal family life. And am I really that okay? I doubt if I even know anything at all, since my mom loved to debate every little detail of my life until I had no choice but to shut up and do what she says 'cause she said so. I'll try to hold on, but I keep dipping into feeling like crap. Nonetheless, I'm happy that you have faith in me. I hope I can make friends in the future, and I'll definitely give it my best; however, I'm just really stressed over the lockdown scenario, especially since my first semester of college life will be spent in my lonely, depressing room. It's really tough not having anyone to care about me (except my parents, but for their own reasons rather than my own). I really do want to believe that everything will turn out fine, and I hope it will. I'm just beginning to lose hope. Will I really feel this trapped forever?
I just want to run away from it all, and start a new life. Too bad I made bad life choices, and am now stuck living with my folks for another 4 wretched years. I really hope I don't spend my life depressed. Damn, I hate feeling like this. I just want friends who won't treat me like my parents do. I just want to live my own life. Is it really that much to ask? I don't even feel like I deserve it. I don't know. What do I know? I just want someone to tell me it's okay, but unfortunately social distancing (which is important) is a thing. I hate being lonely. I want to see real people again.
Thank you for reading my sob story. It really does mean a lot. The Internet is really the only place I get to be honest without worrying about people persecuting me for feeling these things. I hope you have a nice day, and I hope you stay safe! Thanks again :-)
Ian Millado I'm so sorry, now I feel lucky that my parents are loving but slightly agressive. Please, you have my blessings and I hope that you will start a new and better life once you earn money and can support yourself.
@@user-de5pl9vo3g Thank you so much for the sympathy and support. I really appreciate it. One day, hopefully, I'll be able to start again, on my own. I just hope that I'll be able to keep myself together until then. I hope you and your family are doing okay during these times. Thanks again for reading my little essay. It means a lot.
Calling out your parents abusive behavior seems like bad advice. They’ll just get mad at you and turn it around to make you look like the bad guy.
That's true. Going through this. I just can't get through to them.
Well that really depends who you tell, especially if you have evidence such as texts, recorded conversations, videos, etc.. This video does suggest telling a teacher, counselor or administrator. Someone who will listen and accept the truth.
It truly is though. My sister stated her grievances with my mom so calmly....and still got yelled and was made to see like the bad guy.
Maybe.. But the point is to stand up for who you are and address your issues. You need to learn it sometime especially when you don't get it at home
Whenever I try to talk to them they get mad at me and I cry cause they don't understand and they say I'm being unreasonable. I've been through so much emotional abuse that I just resort to crying. It's hard to explain how I get mad but also sad at the same time.
It’s so ironic how I’m 13 years old and I have to handle every fight with my mother like an adult, meanwhile she still acts like a stupid immature teenager.
I have this
Mood, buddy!
our parents didin"t mature at all 😂
Fr
Yeah I have to deal with this to. I'm 13 also
I swear my parents saw this years ago rebranded as "top 10 parenting tips"
* anxiously hides the family time machine *
@• Cloudy Kun • whoosh
@@notyourfrind9415 r/wooosh
Nik does stuff Wow. You really felt for it.
lmao true as hell
Me: *tells them I’m upset and am suicidal*
My parents: IM SO HURT, AFTER EVERYTHING I DID FOR YOU?
Raven J literally my life
They said those exact words to me...
Your profile picture goes along with this so we'll, I-
@raven j true I hate it
At least they try to feel bad, my mom just get angry and tells at me
me: *crying
parents: *yells at me for crying
me: *cries more
parents: wHy aRe yOu cRyInG?
melancholic euphoria¡ that me they moment they yell I start crying
Ikr every parent is so really shit at parenting
Me: I cry because you shout at me
My father: I shout at you because you cry!
Me: ?????????
Ah, shit this hit me hard in the boobs...
My way if saying that's a close thing to me
Felt that.
We grow up in dysfunctional families and have to spend the rest of our lives trying to analyze what happened and heal ourselves. Meantime, we are expected to have and raise our own healthy kids!
Overcoming Toxic Parenting: Being a Good Parent When Your Parent Wasn't by Rick Johnson
That’s true. I didn’t start trying to heal myself until recently. I think I did pretty well raising my 3 children after my husband died. From the very beginning I kept in mind what my mother did to me and how I turned out and did the opposite. For example, I was told I was worthless, stupid and similar things sometimes because I would have an epileptic seizure and whatever she told me I had no memory of. When my kids were growing up, I always told them they were smart, they actually are thanks to their daddy’s genes. I encouraged them to try to do whatever interested them. When my mother was around she told me I was giving them a big head. I was fine with that. Thankfully, I didn’t pass down what she did to me. In fact, my older son told me she has gaslighted me my whole life. She did a lot of the other stuff listed, but that was the major one. Maybe, since I actually have a word for what she still does to me, I can work through this. The first thing was to cut contact with her. A birthday and Christmas card that’s all.
@@deborahthomas3539 so proud of you!!
“Tell then to back off”
I don’t want to die today so no thanks.
If I tell my mom that she's gonna kill me (not literally)
Best Gamer well my brother tried this n he got spanked with a belt n he Scratch My dad’s Neck
only option is moving out XD
whenever I stand up for myself to my parents they ask me “what is wrong with you?” because they have so many expectations and rules. I’ve been threatened by my parents multiple times because I said “no” (once my mom said I may not have a place to sleep tomorrow) it’s sad cause I’m still a child
@@root.l.i.r not easy to a lot of people to do
Me: calls out on manipulative behavior
Parents: Mm, tastes like disrespect
What old fucknuts like them don't understand, tho, is that they haven't even earned respect. They just try to steal it.
I slap
Me: hey mom I think i might have a pretty bad paranoia problem cuz i feel like im being watched all the time and that im being stalked
Mother: oh everyone feels like that its normal stop adking for a therapist
Leala B omg ikr
I don’t even know why the hell im crying everyday. Because of what? I don’t know that myself.
“Tell them to back off”
“Call them out”
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL Tryna get me killed
That's gonna get a fist through my damn skull
it doesn't mean directly like "no back off!" but doing it in a more long term way, starting like telling them you're not interested in what they propose you and prosoing something that you like more etc.
YUP LOL
I want to kill my dad but I don’t dare to
Honestly it's as if they want me died. 🤣
My mom was laughing her ass off while I was crying due to her way to educate me
Psalm 118:17
I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord.
Matthew 7:6
Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.
Job 39:13
The wings of the ostrich flap joyfully.. she lays her eggs on the ground, unmindful that a foot may crush them. She treats her young harshly as if they were not hers for God did not endow her with wisdom or give her a share of good sense. Yet when she spreads her feathers to run, she laughs at horse and rider.
Colossians 3:21
Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
Revelation 21:8
But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars-they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.
2 Samuel 12:15-22
David prayed to God for the sick baby. David fasted and refused to get up or eat. On the seventh day the baby died. Then David went into the Lord’s house to worship. After that he ate. "But now that the baby is dead, I can’t bring him back to life. Someday I will go to him, but he cannot come back to me.”
Numbers 20:15
Our ancestors went down into Egypt, and we lived there many years. The Egyptians mistreated us and our ancestors, but when we cried out to the Lord, he heard our cry and sent an angel and brought us out of Egypt.
Job 8:7
Although your beginnings were small, your future will be very great indeed.
Revelation 21:4
"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
@@audreyheart2180 Amen and thank you, brother
a recipe for bpd
My mom: *screams at me for a stupid reason*
Me: *crys*
My mom: WhY arE yOu cRyInG
Ughhhhh saaaame
If you really cry for a scream then i have no words. I got stuck in my room for 2days without my phone/pc/tv/ps4/can go out with freinds and stuff they were relly toxic
So when am playing a game online she just walk in my room saying am cleaning the bed and then just come and scream in my mic while am like 12-15people on discords call and then when i tell her to leave she just yell more so i have to say like: the fuck out or smh so she leaves and play the victim. The best thing to do is just ignore them of course they will take your stuff but let them feel that you dont need them if they are really toxic. And when you hit 18 just get out of there buddy
Same man I feel tht
@@rxyyt6003 no like they like scream at you for somebody's doing or for no reason like huh?
Me: *crying because Mom screamed at me*
Mom: Stop crying or else I'll slap you
Me: depressed, social anxiety, sleep issues
My mum: you’re doing this to spite me why don’t you care about me
Heart Jimin same thing my mom said yesterday
Mom sounds like she may be a narcissist.
Same here.. even my mother doesn't like me anymore :( just because having depressed (mum thought it was her fault making me depressed :( )
Now I don't ever call " mother " anymore
Heart Jimin me : I am not doing to spite you, you are just spite of me
@unusual coconut so true.
“Report me, see how you’ll do as an orphan”
Damn that's on a whole new level
Anime Lover i mean meh. i think if your parent has the awareness that you know whats going on, they’ll threaten you at some point and claim they’re better than any other bad situation you could be in. honestly, wish i did report it.
My mom is the same but I'm 30 now and I cut her out of my life ;)
Grayson Cassidy report me, see how you'll do in elder institutions
T y l e e then tell her you will report at elder institutions when she become old because you wanna keep your novel than your mom
I’ve called out my parents about their manipulation and verbal abuse toward me numerous times when I was younger and they always claimed they would work on fixing it but they never did. They would always go back to what they did after about a week or so of me confronting them. One day I had enough of their bullshit. I exploded in rage on my father by choking him out and I haven’t seen or spoken to my parents in 8 years. In those 8 years I’ve felt a tremendous weight lifted off of me and I’ve never felt better. I’m now married to the most beautiful woman in the world and we have two wonderful sons together who absolutely adore us. I promise to never put my sons through what I went through. I will break this cycle
Holy crap... I';m sorry you went through that hell, and you have my sympathies.
Me: Has a different opinion / a good point during and argument
My parents: D I S R E S P E C T F U L
I like oranges Sounds like my mom.
ARGHHHHHH!!! I hate it when she does that!
It really be like that sometimes fellas
Me: Gives reasonable questions to how their way is better
Parents: BeCauSe I sAiD sO
So. Real.
Me: *gets diagnosed with depression*
Mom: oh yeah, well me too, I also feel sad sometimes
OH MY GOD THAT'S WHAT MY MOM IS LIKE I TOLD HER ONCE BEFORE DIAGNOSED THAT I FELT LIKE I HAD DEPRESSION AND SHE TOLD ME THAT
This, and talking about anxiety as in "Oh, I think I'm anxious sometimes too, you're fine"
CogsAndGlimmers same like I have social anxiety too and my mom thinks it’s bc I’m too lazy to go anywhere else other than my room
My mom said “why can’t you just try to be happy”
"sometimes I am sad but then I just think about kittens" that's fantastic if it works for you karen.. but kittens didn't help me the past 5 years
that's why i don't want to have kids in the future. i'm afraid that i'll be like my parents.
the fact that you're aware of this behavior is actually a good thing if you have kids, because you'll know that you have to stop them.
jensoo's bitch the biggest step ahead you have is that you're aware! You have the key to break the cycle.
I’ll respect your decision about not wanting kids because of your parents because I’m like you in this case too, but. Being aware is good, because you can do and be things your parents weren’t to you. You can avoid and not do all of the things your parents have done to you....
I am afraid as well...hope you can come out it.
you can always choose to adopt an orphan instead.
I got 7 out of 10. I've struggled with narcissistic abuse, manipulation, and gaslighting. My dad, auntie, older sister, and 2 cousins. It's cruel of what they did to me. I feel sorry for others who also been through the same thing I've been through. Please hang in there and stay strong.
Me: Gets sad
My Mom: I diagnose you with ungrateful
StanCLC me : you diagnosed me wrong, I am so sad to hear that
My mom told me to stop acting depressed cause I was freaking out my dad. I just wished she would've asked why I was sad...
Kimber Nolan same here. My mom told me to stop acting depressed (when I was literally diagnosed) because it’ll hurt my father
@@titam.5509 Well, at least now we know theres someone else going thru it too, and that we ain't alone😊. although I wish it was just me,I hate that others go through this.
@@kimbernolan2010 Same, i wait for a *STUPID* amount of time for they to ask me why i'm sad and cry *EVERY* single day. But that day never came...
I think my parents genuinely love me. But they dont realize the damage they have done 😞
Maybe but. They are adults. The onus is on them but, can't teach an old dog new tricks; especially if the old dog ain't humble.
My Parents r the same. They ACTUALLY love me, but my dad(He had a rough relationship w/ his familly) had abousive tendencys, but with genuinely good intentions. My mom had the memory span of a goldfish(This got me in more trouble than i care to know).She was a good person though i think.
Same
They never want to know how i feel......
same girl
The Pride of our parents is the most toxic thing... they won’t apologize but if did the same thing they will make us apologize
when i was 5 or 6 my mom locked me out of the bedroom because i did something wrong. she didn't let me in until i cried and said sorry enough.
the only way to deal with this is to move out, find a job, in extreme cases go live in another country, find hobbies you enjoy that can easily be done in another place. stick to it, life doesn't have to be like this
Brodie Goat SO RELATABLE! My dad interrupts me all the time and gets mad when I point it out, but when I interrupt he gets mad. His anger problems seem to be getting a bit better though, and I go to school now (I was homeschooled) so now I’m not near him as much.
@@androidbutterscotchkitty I'm homeschooled too but they're planning on open university after college which I don't like because it's the same thing as homeschooling, and I wanted to get away from them and stay-in with my brother and his fiancee.
@@guest-jz4ux This is a good time to try to prepare yourself for when you CAN get out. You are aware of the things your parents are doing, and want to be better. This is a good time to delve into some personal research (like the video above) and using the internet to further your learning and connections with people you can't do in person. The internet offers a sort of anonymity, and you can learn about how other people have dealt with it, and learn skills and resources that you can start now and ones you have to wait for once you reach independence. Just, of course, use the anonymity to your advantage to protect your identity, and be careful of the sorts of people, resources, forums, etc., that you may encounter.
Ugh. I had to let my toxic family go. No contact. I need to work on me,at 45! These videos are spot on. Thank you
"tell them to back off"
one question : how am i supposed to do that without being called disrespectful, might die, being kicked out of the house or being insulted 24 hours?
My parents don’t let me go out with my friend like never is that normal
I just ignored my parents and beat them up, I'm free now even though I am living with them
Ask someone else to help you. this is really sad😢
Ah I know how to counter that: get kicked out and get yourself like in the hospital (no serious injury just like think of something small like you just got tackled by a random guy and you just wanna get checked out) and they will most likely be like “oh no we won’t do that again” it might work just you don’t need to do this but if u found a way good luck homie
Look up a technique called "grey rock"
I don't want to have kids, cuz I'm afraid I might turn into my parents.
Ikr? The thought of making my child feel like I do right now with my parents makes me sick
Yeah, me too. Because its been etched into our subconscious. And whether we like it or not, we'll imitate them without even us realizing. Sad truth. Without undergoing proper healing, that would be us in the future.
You won’t trust me
I am afraid of being lik them too
that's why when ever I see good parents or adivces on how to be a better parent I try to learn
it's hard but we can fight the fear and be better than them
Same here..
Biggest lie ever: You will be free when you turn 18
If you have the financial stability to move out...
@@Asiagirl644 I seriously have done everything I can to get the means to move out and am doing so. It's so awkward at home waiting for the lease to start..
I am already 28 and she is financially controlling me and she sabotages my opportunity making some money. What should I do? I don’t want to be a Bad man :’(
I hope that’s not a lie because for years I’ve been telling myself that it’s only X more years until I can leave this house and my family that has been terrible to each other. I’ve been through some really traumatic experiences due to my family’s choices, and my mom will not let me handle anything on my own to the point where she has to be everywhere that I am. She goes to football games and watches my marching band play but I know what she will just try and find something else to use as leverage when I get an 89 on an assignment. She is the worst about being controlling. She says that she is trying to be less of a puppet master, but that is the stinkiest load of bullshit I’ve ever smelled. I’m just so done with her and my family as a whole...
@@uvn6210find some one to share a place. Took me 23 years and be on quarentine to notice all the manipulations, is f#ing scary when you do it but it's woth it.
Last time I told my mom that I had boundaries she laughed and said “ha what boundaries”
As if it was outrageous for me to have any. Recently I been taking care of her after she got a major surgery and when I broke down and vented about how I have no help she huffed with a smirk and said “that’s life” something I would never say to someone who is venting. She never takes responsibility for any of her actions. I’m always made out to be the bad person. It’s so tiring
Psalm 118:17
I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord.
Matthew 7:6
Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.
Job 39:13
The wings of the ostrich flap joyfully.. she lays her eggs on the ground, unmindful that a foot may crush them. She treats her young harshly as if they were not hers for God did not endow her with wisdom or give her a share of good sense. Yet when she spreads her feathers to run, she laughs at horse and rider.
Colossians 3:21
Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.
Revelation 21:8
But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars-they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.
2 Samuel 12:15-22
David prayed to God for the sick baby. David fasted and refused to get up or eat. On the seventh day the baby died. Then David went into the Lord’s house to worship. After that he ate. "But now that the baby is dead, I can’t bring him back to life. Someday I will go to him, but he cannot come back to me.”
Numbers 20:15
Our ancestors went down into Egypt, and we lived there many years. The Egyptians mistreated us and our ancestors, but when we cried out to the Lord, he heard our cry and sent an angel and brought us out of Egypt.
Job 8:7
Although your beginnings were small, your future will be very great indeed.
Revelation 21:4
"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
ON GOD
Just walk out
@@camellia8625 lol I moved out. Things are so much better now.
@@imaphoenix1 Thank you. Yeah, that's super dismissive. I can't picture saying to a friend "that's life" sure, it is. But not quite the supportive words. I am sorry too, I hope she validates your feelings.
Me: *has opinions*
Parents: IMPOSSIBLE
My mom is more like "don't you dear talk back to me."
Me: *has gay friends*
Mom: IS BLANK GAY?
Me: Has A in a class
Parents: IMPOSSIBLE
My mom:*is manipulative*
Me: *is suicidal*
My mom:**UNGRATEFUL bRaT**
OMG MY MOMMMMMM LMAOOOOOO
^laughter hiding pain
me...
One of the first things ive laughed at in ages
also my mum: mIGht aS wELL kILL yOurSelF
My adult life is a wreck because of my manipulative mother. Do. Not. Be. Like. Me. Don't be afraid to be yourself, try new things, or go outside your comfort zone. That's how you grow, and become yourself.
Blade4952 my parents say that but when I am trying to be myself they always stop me from doing it. For example I try new clothes that I actually like and they start saying “those are boys clothes” “you look fat/skinny or that” “you look like a boy, you are a girl you can’t wear boy clothes” and I always thought that they were trying to help me and that u was being emotional. But when I saw this video I was shook because I relate to everything on this video. Now I know that I need to defend myself but when I do they always blame it on me or they just act like they are being the victim or they will just call me disrespectful and that I am being a brat and start calling me names. Now I just don’t really fight with them neither show my emotions.
I finally told my mother about how she made me feel as a child growing up. Now she keeps saying, "since I'm a horrible mother." I struggle everyday trying to be okay with myself without worrying about whether she approves or not. I honestly don't care anymore because no matter what I say or do she will feel what she wants versus hearing me out.
@@chrislinnd I'm so sorry to hear that! Just remember, that they do not own you, and this is your life, not theirs. It's okay to listen to our parents, as they have experience we have yet to accumulate; however, it is important to remember, that they are just people too. And sometimes they are wrong. My advice is, that when they are not around you, try not to think "What would my parents think of me?". Be safe, but get outside that comfort zone every once and awhile, and live your life. Wishing you the best!
@@underthepalmtree My mother says the exact same thing after I finally stood my ground a couple years back, and told her how abusive she was to me when I was growing up. I just ignore those remarks now, tuned them out. I am sorry to hear you are going through this too, but just know that you are valuable, and uniquely you. Your mom does not own you, and does not control your thoughts. Those are yours, and yours alone.
Same! like my dad I was suppose to get a job and my dad is always like oh your not ready you have to let me do it I'm like WHAT?! let me do what I have to do before I wouldnt understand how to do it my damn self then I'll be fucking homeless and not never get and job and take care of myself and I always feel like I have to stay home everyday and not do nothing with my life like let me live!!
Anybody else almost have a panic attack when she suggested you “call your parents out”? I was literally shaken my head side to side listening
I started crying because I always thaught that my parents were right but now I'm totally confused, if I'm a bad child or there the bad parents...
Probably you have bad parents
@@somefatkid2080 me too, i think my parents are the reason why i have social anxiety and depression until now. it starts to developed when i was 10-12. it gets worst in high school, since i got bullied a lot. and ofc my parents never did anything to help me with it.. now here i am, suffering.
@@anotherdeadgirl.mp3 yea me too
@@anotherdeadgirl.mp3 same. I can't deal with it.
Its not you if you want to talk here is my insta! @jotalyne_ I know this is a little late but better late then never
Whenever I have a problem, my mom twists it around to make it about herself and it’s gotten to the point where I can’t talk to her about my problems anymore
@@gaia.6083 when your mom is lying about how good she was as a child
i have the same problems :/
same ...whenever i tell my parents my problems they turn them and make it about themselves or say that it's all my fault
"and if they continue to disrespect you call a teacher, administrator, etc."
me: calls the president
Putangina.
Vanessa Wertheim What is Putangina? I must know!
@@Pachitaro its a filipino swear word lol
@@diya-rc4fr Thank you, brave soldier
I talked to my aunt about my mom once. Now my mom blames me for not being able to talk to her sister anymore.
me: *Stands up for myself*
Parents: *Beats me. shouts at me and carries on threatening me*
Sometimes it's hard to stand up to manipulative and emotionally abusive parents.
Especially when no one believes you or doesn't want to know OR where the parents spin the story to make out that YOU'RE the problem.
exactly. it is easy for these people to say so. in reality, they don't know how it feels to be where we are.
me: has a different opinion and has a good point in a argument
Parents: DISRESPECTFUL, SELFISH, LAZY-
That’s definitely mine. Just turned 21 today, but I have tons of homework to do and an exam to study for, and wasn’t 100% ready for celebrating my birthday today (I’m in a community college & have no dorm btw). But my parents forced me to celebrate it immediately when I got home, made me “smile for the camera” (I don’t smile too well with teeth open often btw, I’m not as good as the celebrities); and when I didn’t get a “pretty pic” they’d redo it too many times. They even attempted to tickle me like a freakin toddler! And when I told them to please calm down and let me breathe and have my cake, they went completely insane, screamed at me calling me “ungrateful”, “disrespectful”, and “selfish”, and stressed me out on my 21st birthday. They thought I was pressuring myself, (especially when I told them that I HAD a test to study for because they’d ALSO piss all over me if I just happened to not make the grade) despite the fact that THEY were the ones making me feel uncomfortable. (my mom even threatened cancelling all other birthday celebration plans I had for the weekend because of just ONE day of getting serious with assignments; ONE, UNBELIEVABLE) Sadly, you just can’t reason with such parents because they will always spin it off of their own miserable lives & point the finger at YOU no matter what. And I just can’t surrender to mine any longer. I can’t wait to get outta the house, live in a dorm on university campus, and move to a new state. I do infact care about others btw, but it’s matipulative people (whether they’re parents, teachers, neighbors, or significant others) that make me and everyone else in such “relationships” want to just live for ourselves, for real! Btw, my parents don’t even get along with each other either & many other family members of mine don’t seem to act normal either (another significant sign you’re in a toxic relationship; your family’s lives might not be as “perfect” as the story that their selling you).
oh my god my mom is like "YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW"
mom I know I spend a lot of time on games but that's not everything I spend my time on
My parents: I want you to be happy
Also my parents: takes my stuff that makes me happy
I'm not the only one,I guess...
You know, I love to dance but they tell me to study...
Facts
I know the feeling 😐
This is my mom. I use age regression as a coping mechanism all her reasearch went towards her point. She said she wants me grow up and that normal people don’t do this and that it’s not normal.
Same 😔
My parents: "manipulate me and emotionally abuse me"
Me: "develops antisocial personality disorder"
My parents: "omg you are so cruel we didn't teach you this"
Nevermore 721 SAME SAME SAME
“I don’t know where this came from, it couldn’t have been from our house. We’ve been supportive of you, we’ve given you a roof over your head and food to eat and water to drink and clothes to wear and a school to go to... so obviously you have loving parents, why are you developing these issues?!”
they understand nothing sometimes...
OMG RELATE!! I have depression and anxiety and my mum is like THIS ISNT FAIR YOURE HURTING ME WITH YOUR FAKE ILLNESSES (i’ve been diagnosed by a doctor and on medication). If i cut or talk about suicidal feelings I get YOU’RE SO SELFISH WHAT DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO?! (I dont really talk about how i feel anymore)
Sophia Redwood OMG YES. my mom always says that its my best friends fault for being a negative influence on me and i honestly hate it.
Well my parents know that I have aspd and bpd and they just don't seem get that I would've been fine if they were loving and supportive .
I can relate but I made a choice to stand up for my self
My mom is obsessed with me being with her, wants to know a lot about my life and uses guilt tripping. It is just so overwhelming, I feel cornered and when I am not with her she makes herself the victim.
Parents reflect their own insecurities and regrets on their kids.. don’t let them become their own people.
That’s the same as abuse...
Hindrance of growth that's what that is. And yes it is abuse. 👏🏼💯
Me: my opinion is just as important as yours!
Them: no because i am the parent
Jenna Pitts yes, because I am child from parent
Mine is worst, they don't care if thier opinions are wrong or right because they are the parents and I have to listen to them no matter what
@@conghautran6317 same
Fax
Công Hậu Trần cos they're gonna destroy you alive so keep listen to them
This gives me so much clarity and relief that I'm not dramatic
Yeah right now I'm 16 and I just wanna move out of my parents house
@@rayx1679 you a re gonna make it we are all part of the club, besides some unsolicited advice is that is still family so even whe u leave they r gonna be part of your life so try to practice deattachemt from their options and behaviours even if u want to prove yourself. It takes time is a bumpy road.
@@maddie5131 Ok Thank you Mansi
im so glad this video found you
You are not dramatic and you will never be, because the truth is not dramatic❤️❤️
My mom just uses her love and what she does for me to guilt trip me. She makes everything about her, and everytime i try to tell her how i feel about what she does, she just makes it about herself and how SHE'S feeling. She's threatening to send me to Boarding School.
*BEWARE of parents who want to live their lives and fulfil their dreams through you*
- Threatening with disowning or other dire consequences if you don’t attend the university of their choice
- Being extra nice to you during some specific occasion, just to have it as a weapon in the future, to remind you
- Telling you lies about something that you have been asking for a long time, just so you can keep obeying (watch their actions)
My mother wanted to give me a special gift for my birthday. She told me: "we can travel where you want, but we can't travel to the US or Europe" So, I asked for a drawing tablet. She said: "we can't afford that" So... She said "how about we throw a party? A big party with all your friends, and family, and a lot of reggaetton" I was dissappointed. Why? Becaude I hate parties, and I have... What, 3 friends? I hate reggaeton and I prefer bedroom pop. We ended up throwing the party. Long story short, I cried all night. Why? Becaude it was horrible. She gave me this ridiculous pink dress allthough she knew that I hate pink. No one gave me ANY respect at all. My parents were no where to be found at the party, and my classmates were rude to me. I was scared. Is this a manipulative Mother? Or she just wants to see her frustrated dreams come true, but with her daughter?
That 2nd one hurts. I'd rather not receive anything if the intent is like that
@@StinkyBumblebeeGamer wow, i actually hope my mother was like that, don't get me wrong but you just didnt clarify what you needed and wanted more
@@StinkyBumblebeeGamer I would say this is manipulative parenting. There are questions that come to mind though. How is your relationship with your parents? Are you open with them and freely express your feelings of concern about anything? Or do you tend to bottle it up because you feel as though asking would be a bother? I do also find it rather disrespectful of your mother to buy you something she should KNOW you don't like. To me there could be nothing more insulting on my birthday, even more than not getting a gift at all. I would possibly try to express your resentment towards the gift. Ask something like if you could possibly exchange it for something else. If they ask why just express that you don't like the color/design or whatever else you don't like about it. They may get offended and simply try to express it's not that you don't appreciate the thought, but rather it was merely something that isn't your style. Anything much further to press you to keep the clothing or expressing at how they work SO hard to get things for you and support you, this is manipulative and downright abusive. Go ahead and shoot me a message sometime if you have any questions or would like me to explain something further. I always enjoy helping in these situations.
I remember my mom told me that she would make me live with my grandparents if I don't do something I don't remember...
I remember this other time my mom almost kicked my older sister out the house and she didn't nothing wrong and she asked why she was crying (because you're disowning her duh) and she said she didn't do anything or say anything about her or God and she stopped. This scares me a lot my older sister could've almost been kicked out the house for nothing and she wasn't even close to 18 and I think kicking kids out under age of 18 is child endangerment
_”It’s okay to cry when there’s too much on your mind- The clouds rain too when things get heavy”_
-Amina Mehmood
A3Ris Cake_124 same, my mom keeps telling me I’m faking it to get attention or that crying is weakness. It’s not, hell, it’s the opposite; it’s strength (unless if you’re _really_ faking it, but you still can’t jump to conclusions too soon if someone cries). As another quote says “Crying doesn’t make you weak. It means you’ve been strong for too long”. Plus, we’re all imperfect, at some point in our lives, we shed tears, and that’s okay. Just always remember to get back up on your feet, and have high hopes :)
A3Ris Cake_124 you too ^-^
Wanna meet Jamaican parents? If i cry they say, "Want me to give you something to cry for"?
iiChxse 😂
Fact: Everyone who is facing parental abuse like me are just clinging on to 'hope' and nothing else.
Felt that. Too true, man.
@Markiplier _The Trash_ You will win one cannot be defeated until he/she gives up
Yea 😔
and even that is starting to dwindle
suicide is honestly the only thing i hope for
@@digitalcyclone7218 You want to commit suicide?
this gives me relief that i’m not the dramatic one because i express how i feel… does anyone else’s parents claim they’re always right because they’re the “parents”
“Are you being abused by your parents?” More like waking up everyday and going to war. My parents are really toxic. I just feel like giving up all together.
Yeah,I feel you...every time I wake up it's like world war lll
Hang in there, all of you.. we are in this together
True that
Don't worry guys. You can get through anything! Bailey Dickess, please don't give up! We're all here and we all love you.😊
No don't you can do it. As soon as I can I'm moving out of my mom's apartment. I suggest that I also feel this way
Know that it's not your fault. I felt that.
Yeah at one point of time you feel that but the next moment you feel guilty for even thinking about it and now it's your fault and your parents are victims again.
😔
Not all of this but some of this video....they manipulate me to do chores for them....I've never said no bc I'm scared they will yell at me 😩😬😕
@damn right no...I'm sorry to hear that....prayers for u and ur family...tho I must say, ever got hit in the head with a thick pan?
This hits where it was needed, I was just about to gaslight myself into believing I was the 'horrible' person.
parents: “if you love me, you would do this”
i love you but what you want from me doesn’t make me happy and i thought you wanted me to be happy.
RIGHT?!
She doesn’t love you, she owns you
For real my mom used that on me and my sister too make us feel guilty cause we were mad at her and stuff about father figure stuff
I can totally relate.
This happen to me all the time until I start say no or do different time. It was hard at first. Just say I have things to do. They might still get angry or keep asking. Stand your ground and say "no".
My parent has a lack of trust for me, they seem to leverage the fact that “Im not responsible enough” to never let me leave even thought I will be able to drive in about a month. I get they’re trying to protect me, but I can’t even go to the park without telling them. Then proceed to say I’m disrespecting them for showing them how much they don’t trust me and say that I hurt them, and after that, listen to me profusely apologize.
"they don’t respect your boundaries"
this hit me hard
@I'm a cupcake me too bro. Me too.
I think, a youtube commenter once said, their mom found their diary and proceeded to talk about everything in it after meeting each other.
It is sad, my mother always walks into my room without knocking and immediately stares at what I’m doing and asks questions.
@@imkindacold-860 That sucks. Is she the kind of person who still does that, even if you ARE studying?
Dew F
Most definitely.
She just did it now and asked what I was doing and it makes me feel guilty for nothing and I jumped and nervously explained I was doing homework for so and so classes.
But idk I feel like she means well but I just want my space you know?
Dealing with parents like this is seriously one of the most mentally and physically exhausting things that someone can go through. I am mentally and physically sick, literally sick because of my parents. And I know that there is nobody to reach out to, as they will always find a way to make me look like the person in the wrong to others. Who else
Me too...good thing I'll be moving out in a few months...
My legal guardian has done the same to me to the point where I'm seen as just another "moody,rebellious teenager when I just need some help to get out. I'm sorry this is happening to you, and I hope things get better❤💯
@@webcomiclulu9056 wish I could, I'm pretty sure they are gonna try to take everything from me. They made me codependent. Like they have complete financial control. I have no jobs in my area. I live in the country. I can't wear what they don't like. I can't go anywhere without checking in ever 5 minutes to an hour to make sure I'm at where I said I'm at. I've never lied to them about where I'm at. If I say certain things she gets mad and really mean or she completely stops talking to me and ignores me. I hope you are able to move out asap.
@@blaikegash3426 :( pls don't give up the hope... you'll become independent someday...
@@webcomiclulu9056 yeah, I applied for a job yesterday. Even if they don't want me to get a job..I need to.
I’m actually in tears after watching this my mom is exactly like this
hey, you're not alone
Same. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. We'll be free someday tho, just keep going
Honestly, half of us feel that. I'm sad about it tbh how fvked up this all this. It'll be ok one day
Alwkjs a dude same, my heart just dropped at the end of the video, I don’t want to think of my mother badly, but most of this is what my mom does, I don’t even think she realizes it
Alwkjs a bro seriously
The “You deserve so much more” made me cry
My mom told me I’m being “dramatic”/ “a drama queen” while I was having a nervous breakdown and about to pass out because of frustration due to her pushing me emotionally lol
🙂. I got hit by my mom just bcz I was having a breakdown and I went to other room to cry. She said I was showing attitude and being disrespectful.
@@sakura.8138 it happened to me too, but the scariest thing is my little 5year old sis and mom had hurt me with a knife 👌nice👌
Same here I was expressing my feelings to her and had one of the biggest mental breakdowns ever and she threatened to call the office on me if I didn’t shut up it hurt bad.
i wass having also a nerovous breakdown, and i told em i just wanna have a bit of space, but they keep pressuring me, speaking fake facts and saying that if i dont stop, they will gonna call the ambulance, then he started to beat me.
@@sakura.8138 oh my god
You forgot emotional manipulation and emotional blackmail. The art of "I raised this for 18 years and now this raises me for the rest of my life"
Also, how some parents make their children feel guilty by using pity. Also, how religion is used against you because "Mother's are sacred".
This needs to be heard
Just advice, but look at it from the other person's perspective and you just might get a better understanding of this sort of overtly clingy love. Try loving them back as appreciation for raising you, not as a burden, and you might see some improvements in both you and your parents' behaviour.
Agree 100%!! Like your actual mental health is below that stupid thought that family has to be together no matter what just because of a fucking bloodline
@Vociferous .wav what religion do you beleve in?
@Vociferous .wav ok, I was just curious
If you're an introvert and someone asks you to go out, then you said, "lemme ask my mom" but your mom is the no-type person... *it's an advantage*
Im an introvert and my mom is like aww do what u like type person
Relate much! I'm an introvert, mom is a narcissist 😢
No it's not. Being an introvert doesn't mean making excuses is okay
True
@@haiirohyoushi95 if u know how introverts usually are, we r not thaaat out going. So its good if we have an actual reason than any made up excuse.
Its hard when you realise how messed up your parents where. Yes they were trying to make good decisions for you but those decisions has never onced made you happy. Its hard when you realise your parents had their own tramas but they always fail to acknowledge it. Standing up for yourself seem toxic for them when they have never seen your side of the world
There is also "dehumanization " that some parents resort to. I don't know how many people have this issue but, it's like :
1. Your not allowed to be mad, upset, etc. For example, mad = you get yelled at, sad = you get made fun of, etc. It's fine for them to be upset and they can call you whatever they want but, if you do then your being negative and a brat.
2. They constantly get upset at any mistakes you made. Wether it's big or small, ignorance or not. It gets turned into a screaming match where they always win. They can put blackmail like, threatening to record you getting angry and posting it on facebook, taking pictures of you doing something and posting it online, phoning a close friend or relative by letting them lie and make you look bad, etc. It makes you feel small and weak.
3. They will always play the victim. In every single argument they find some way to blame you and hold almost everything against you. Basically they demonize you. They make you seem like your the devil himself to others but, make you seem good when they decide you should be forgiven.
4. It's impossible to tell them any kind of mental health related issue for fear of being mocked, disowned or worse. For example, I'm more of an introvert and have possible anxiety because of my past and, my mom's boyfriend will say things like, "You can't even interact normally, ooh is your anxiety going off!?" Or "You wonder why no one likes you, your not normal". I think you can tell they are more extroverted.
5. They are practically bullies in sheep's clothing. Hurting you if they think you annoy them, mocking your interests and hobbies, telling lies about you, etc. Also, any friends you make they will try to turn them against you. Also, your grades are never good enough to them like, " Oh you have a 95% in English? Well you could of done better.".
6. Your forced to relay on them so they are in a position of power. By not letting you get a job while in school, not allowing you to make decisions on your own, etc.
I could write more but these are the main issues I have. I'm not sure if I did just list down manipulation but, a little more extreme. Anyways, thanks for reading.
I hope you have a great day/night.
Edit : It's only been 24 hours and, I can't believe how many people relate to this. I truly am sorry for all you who have to suffer like this. It's a shame that abuse is normalize nowadays. I pray from the bottom of my heart that things get better for all of you, and you get to be happy once again.
@@idekanymore8361 I'm so sorry to hear that, I understand what that feels like. Nobody who has a mental illness, confirmed or not, deserves that. I think it's amazing that you want to get diagnosed, even if your unsure about it. Just try to hang in there until you can move. If you need to, try to go on walks or be out of the house more often, to get away for a bit. It might be hard but, I do promise things will get better if you keep trying to move forward.
Also, if her mocking gets worse ,try to find a safe place to stay until you can fully move out, either with a friend, family or shelter. It takes a lot of strength to admit something is not okay and your very brave for commenting.
I hope things get better for you in the future and wish you the best of luck. I hope I managed to help you in some way.
I'm open to talking if you need to. Have a great day.
FrostenShadows Oh, I go through that. Every single one. I know how you feel. I hope there’s a light at the end of the tunnel for everyone like us, and I pray this growing generation can, I don’t know, ACTUALLY TRY to understand and love their children when the time comes.
@@sophiaredwood5825 Yea, I totally agree with you. It's really sad that being used is a reality for almost everyone in our generation. I'm sorry you and plenty of others have to go through this as well.
I look forward to see how our generation grows. I feel as if there is plenty of hope left so, we can leave behind the abusive and belittling reality the older generation forced onto us.
The only thing everyone can do is be kind to each other, to show everyone that there is still good people left that can help make the future better. Not just for us but, for the younger generations aswell.
I apologize for ranting however, I hope everyone can learn that the dark is only scary until, you find the courage to turn on the light.
My mum does all these. I repress all my emotions and refuse to talk about my mental health to anyone because mum gets really mad and yells at me. Usually calls me selfish.
@@rainbowrocketwolf2268 I'm really sorry to hear that. It's a sucky situation to be in and nobody deserves to have to suffer all alone. If you can, try distancing yourself from her like, taking walks, doing things you like more, etc.
Your pretty strong for putting up with all of it. For talking about your mental health, if there's no one to talk to it about, try venting to stuffed animals or figurines. It sounds silly but sometimes it can help, at least a little since they can't have an opinion on anything.
I hope things get better for you soon. Have a great day.
Mom always uses the excuse of “I birthed you, I gave you life.”
I guess that's why, when a mother kills her kids, justice treats her as if she's the victim (it happened recently, a mother who kept her daughter in a car trunk for two years - I kid you not. You can guess the consequence of such treatment. The court tried to find a,ny way to let her get scot free and the daughter's lawyer, exasperated, had to remind them who the victim was here…
Whip out the counter attack:
"I never asked to be born"
@@buzz.e6077 Where's your Uno Reverse card?
Ah but I have an UNO reverse card, “did I ASK to be birthed??”
@@buzz.e6077 top 5 ways to get yelled at
1. They compare you to siblings, relatives or friends.
2. They raise you to be codependent.
3. They constantly guilt trip you.
4. They set unrealistic expectations.
5. They make everything about them.
6. They intimidate you with cruel tactics.
7. They treat you more like an object.
8. They gaslight you.
9. They don't respect your boundaries.
10. They fail to provide you with unconditional love.
My mom failed in everything but my father is my hero he loved me whereas my mother took her anger on me
this is everything my mom is. I don't like my mom so much to the point where i respect my cheating dad more. At least my dad actually loves me. I'm glad they split
@@gatomeong ☺️ hope you live a good live
All of these are my parents
@@thefake_default5963 my aunt was my hero, my mom definitely failed me
Wow this struck a huge chord with me and I never even thought about it like this: “you should never feel like you have to earn your parents support”.
if you constantly feel trapped and that you’re always inferior or making mistakes...you have manipulating parents and or relationships.
Me: suicidal
Parents : how dare you shame us like this
kat coal exactly like wtf my parents are so narcissistic and controlling and feel like I have to get permission to even talk to them and when I have a serious conversation with them about my emotions and how they make me feel like I want to literally kurmit suicide and they f•cking just yell at me and use there physical leverage and seniority to make it about them and explain to me how disrespectful that would be and boo hoo them them them them all the time like It gets me so god dam depressed sometimes
Me too
What jerks!
Have you ever been to Asia?
Me: *Growing depression*
Parents: There's nothing for you to be sad about, stop acting that way *Goes into lecture*
My dad’s idea of a conversation is him talking, when I talk it’s disrespectful and wrong. I will never not talk back. I can’t wait to move out.
Damn I feel this except with my mom... I will be spitting straight facts and think it's disrespect... After a while I try to just stay quiet to avoid a mental breakdown or to have her take away my stuff... There are times to where I wont even be doing anything and she'll just yell at me because she's in a bad mood... When I try and say that she's yelling at me for no reason than she just gets mad...
Music_ Beauty I just avoid my parent tbh, even though we live in the same house I probably only see him once a day. I found the less I interact with him the better. Also with this whole pandemic thing he sometimes gets scared when he thinks I’m sick so thats a pro
Same
I need to move out too !
bitch same
2:39 It is nearly impossible to stand on your own ground when parents are the ones who can control you financially. I actually have my life planned beforehand when I was in high school. I wanted to learn video production and start a production company of my own as it is my passion and I catch up fast when it comes to photo editing video editing and after effects. Unfortunately my dad forced me to take on accounting as it is "stable" (but is not my strength or passion). I stood on my own ground, and he says it's either accounting or you'll never get into college. So yes here I am studying things that I don't like, and my dad would blame me if I am underperforming.
Same...And the worst thing is, I'm a pleaser too. My parents won't talk to me if ever I express my emotions.
I also wanted to be a chess grandmaster but my parents forced me to do engineering and now when i perform bad I get scolded
I'm 20 years old.. It's too late. My mom's got me where she wants me. Dependent and unable to leave her side.
Only if you wanna stay that way. Hurts like hell, but the relief when you get away is like learning you can take a deep breath for the first time in your life.
Actually if you dive deep into your self & know your desires & your value &of course want to be a human not be an programmed(even organized) living creature
It’s not too late
you can live as yourself
Don’t forget that”The only one who gonna change you,IS YOU”
everything in your life depends on your will.
I learned this the hard way
I feel you bro I'm 37 and I feel the same way but I understand what j is saying the problem is, if you don't have any financial help to go to school any good school that is or to get on your feet period it's alot harder to breathe that first breath of freedom but don't worry it will happen for you don't do what I did at 20 and believe my dad's lies of handing his business over to me then sign it to my dick of an uncle who hated my life on his deathbed and get left out in the cold or whatever get a job get someone to help you if you can don't agree to pay rent save up and get out of there you are 20 you still have time if you feel like this now emagine how you'll feel later in life I had nobody to tell me shit I learned this for my self im just now getting used too today's technology and I'm using a 2017 android with my naybers Wi-Fi use only cous this phone has no SIM and my mom hates technology so get yourself together try to get out there
to Jesse there is no if you want it to be that way some of us have it worse then others please understand that no disrespect
My feelings don't matter.
My struggles don't matter.
I'm just a puppet... to get what they want.
That's why I decided I keep all of my plans to myself and keep my mouth shut.
Azrael I feel the exact same way
Just don't obey then
So gonna try and lighten the mood by saying it’s time for fucking crusade
@@alventuradelacruz522 If only it was easy😭
@@LeBronyaJames it's easy if you believe it ,it's difficult if you believe it
My Mum: "I hate how negative you are. You should be proud of myself."
Also my Mum: "Your so fat. I hate your hair. Your so mean. You used to be so much better when you were young."
Dude same
Same •-•
Might have teared up reading this lol
Ikr
my mom in a heartbeat
Dang, it sucks to see so many people have terrible parents. It makes me appreciate my parents and how nice they are. Wish the best for y'all.
Report card : *get all A*
That one parent : why did you get "F" on gender?
Lemon MintZ
I want to wheeze at the comment but I’m not as capable of laughing as I once was.
Why isn't this higher up??? 😂😂
Lemon MintZ lmao isn’t this an Amazing World of Gumball joke?
@@nekorina9011 glad someone get the joke
@@nekorina9011 yuh
Parents: *_compares me to other kids_*
Me: *_compares them to other parents and adults_*
Parents: *_surprised Pikachu face_*
Aw, let me play the smallest violin for those parents that got roasted
Meee
My parents in this situation: *YOU CAN FIND OTHER PARENTS THEN*
Also Parents: How dare you! I don't know how we ended up with such an ungrateful wretch like you! You only get one set of parents! You ought to show a little more gratitude! Can't you see we only want what's best for you!?
Sorry, moooooom! I didn't choose to be born into this shit world
the signs somebody doesn't have abusive parents:
"Stand up to your parents, call them out"
Lol. True.
I get beat if I do that
And that is why no one understands when you simply don't have any chance. You hear others complaining all the time, and you can't even get in the position to complain. Its frustrating and terrible.
23 years old realizing this about my mom. threatened to call the cops on me when i was 11 years old for lying to her about the fact that i practiced piano that day
I've hever heard something like "You made me do this." What they always said was "It's my right as a parent."
I usually hear "Because I'm your dad and I know better."
Calli my mom takes age and pushes me down with it. “You’re only a teenager, I know what’s better for you, you’re incapable of making decisions and knowing when you’re wrong.”
My mom also says that for my age I have no idea what suffering is. She says I’m too young for problems, that I haven’t reached adulthood yet so I have no idea what it means to suffer...
Heh... if only....
Sophia Redwood
You’re comment is too real. Thank you 🙏🏻
Neibdgncf Ftgbcgj I’m both sorry and glad if you relate to this, sorry that you have to feel that kind of pain and glad that you know you aren’t alone 💜
Sophia Redwood EXACTLY MY POINT.
Some of this "advice" sounds like an excellent way to get kicked out.
Thought I’d update this because after being reminded through notifications lol. I’m in college now so live on my own, it was only ever one parent who was truly toxic to me and the disowned me at about mid November. In the months that followed I went through so much, my depression got truly abysmal and I started failing classes. But then, things started to get better. I had to confront the fact with my heart that that parent was shitty and stop covering up every bad thing they’d done and making excuses. It made me feel so guilty at fist but eventually it did wonders to my emotional well being. I finally saw myself as equal to my peers and people around me, I finally have self confidence that truly comes from a place within, I started seeing a psychiatrist cause it previously wasn’t allowed, and moment by moment I started to see through the manipulation and realize that I truly didn’t deserve it. I feel true relief and happiness for the first time as well as feelings of worth and value I’d never thought I’d be capable of and allowed to have. I feel like I am allowed to exist - to live my life - and that I don’t have to be paying off some constant burden just to be around.
The biggest thing I’ve learned is that there are 2 ways to listen to manipulative people - with your ears and with your heart. I know personally how much of a bad idea it may be for minors to confront their parents - that the justice system is broken and can’t do shit; I got my ass beat for perceived eye rolls that I didn’t even do trust me. But you can start doing these things internally. Make a journal of everything that happened or start recording moments to keep in a safe place so every time you almost get tricked by their nice mode you can hold your ground. Don’t internalize their messages, don’t fall for bs like “it’s so hurtful becuase its true.” Track when they break their promises so you have proof to go up against the always honest persona they portray but that feels off. Tell friends who you know won’t snitch so they’ll hold you accountable. Don’t fall for the idea that it’s just you or that another kid would’ve learned quicker and so gotten out of the constant torments. If you find yourself believing that you are just so much worse than everyone else because of bad luck or something - because when you think about it you can’t actually remember doing anything that much worse compared to where you place yourself in society - stop doing that. You are doing better than you realize and you truly truly do not deserve this treatment. Would you take from other people- like if a stranger just started telling you all these things and doing all the things an abusive person has done to you. Let yourself bask in the label that they are indeed abusive - don’t let them buy it off through their nice phases. Revel in calling them a pos, mean, manipulative, a problem etc etc. Whatever they may say to you - it’s not you who made them this way. If there truly was a change compared to anyone else - it’s them realizing they could get away with shit when it came to you. Internalize the message that you DESERVE to be alive and you shouldn’t have to constantly be earning that right. In your head fight back against the messages - don’t let your heart open up to the idea that there’s some truth to what they are saying. You got this. One day you will be free - and it’ll be the best feeling you’ll ever have.
If they kick you out for defending yourselft then they are not your parents
Ahahahah, exactly what happened to me. Two times.
But it can be a good thing at the end. You get out of your toxic cage and it's like you can breathe for the first time
Great. Come tell all the runaways living on the street they made great individual choices and are well on the way to a successful and sustainable life among society.
Hahaha, yeah. I confronted my mom on some of the things covered in the video and haven't talked to her since. I'm out now though.
Stuffz they made me codependent so now I they threaten to kick me out
i need you guys to make a video about how parents can be so toxic that they make you depressed because boy i would love to watch that
Same
Are you looking for a video on "reasons why your parents are toxic?" If so, we got you covered.
@@Psych2go I need a video about mental illness because i've been having problems about it lately.
@@Psych2go If u can, can u also make a videos about social anxiety and how it differs from shyness, if u cant thats okay
Ditto
Having parents that are nice one second and yelling at you the other sure is exhausting man
This channel’s comment section is better than any therapist could ever be..
Worst when your parents refuse for having a therapist because they think I am "fine"
@gameplayz My mom want me to go to therapist bc i am lesbian and i am scered so much. I dont know what to do bc she said that she want to kick me out of house. I am only 15.
@@andjelastojkovic5462 you might as well pack your stuff and leave if your mother want to judge you based on your personal desires, it's best to grab stuff you need to survive and look for a better family that's both mentally and physically good for you although that's just my opinion, BTW you could get your mother in prison if she kicks you out of the house and decides not to take care of you.
gameplayz my therapist exposed me
andjela stojkovic I know what I say now is a really big step and I don’t expect you to listen to my advice, if I was you I would not go to that „Terapist“ no matter what and if she gets violent towards you call the police and tell them everything that is really hard Ik since you feel like that you can’t do that to your mother but trust me it’s for the best and most importantly be proud of your self I may not know you but from what I read I think that you are a strong person who goes through so much but yet is still strong enough to not give up and asks for advice wich is from what I know something that needs a lot of confidence over all never forget that you are a great person and deserve better
Me: Points out what they are saying is wrong/gives out facts
Parents : "HoW DaRe YoU TaLk BaCk To Me?!!?"
Like jesus christ. This is exactly what i'm NOT going to do when i have a child..
Thats 90% of the time with my dad
Same
Literally today my mom acused me of taking up my librians time even tho my mother was the one asking her if she could help me find a book, and she constantly favors my twin sister over me
Exactly and when you say nothing there like "what, so your gonna ignore me now!?"
"Don't talk back to me" actually means "Don't attempt to defend yourself, I am the authority and I will berate you for this thing you may or may not have done"
The amount of times my dad has said “I’m paying for your college” or “I can just stop paying for things” to make me do whatever they ask is crazy. My stepmom plays the victim card every time she can, and then says “You know I’m tough on you and it’s hard for me too” without even trying to fix the problem at hand.
It’s literally gotten to the point where I can’t stand next to either of them without wanting to cry. I’ve had times where I burst into tears when I enter their room because I’m so scared that they’ll scream at me and insult me.
Thanks for letting me vent out my frustrations, it really helps to know that I shouldn’t treat their behavior as what a parent is.
You'll have your own life one day, pay for your own things, be in charge of your own life - you'll be free. Some adults tend to tell teenagers that being a grown-up is hard and that being a child is easier. Don't listen to them. Sure, it's a challenge, but trust me, it's sooo much better to be an adult, especially for children who come from an abusive or controlling home. You'll be fine, just keep making healthy choices and don't ever give up on yourself. Good luck to you.
Holy fucking extortion, Batman! Get through college so you can abandon their illegal asses. You got this, m8.
hOlY fUcK, Im in the same situation as you. You dont deserve this at all, no one those.
Kat Kon sounds a lot like my life
Kat Kon well, you should learn from them, they're best teachers at being crazy.
The best thing I did having a manipulative mother is leaving home and being independent. My mother tried every manipulative way to make me stay at home i.e. writing me off the will or making me feel guilty if I left home. I would never trade my freedom to go back to the abuse.
Me: makes a valid point in an argument
My mom: Is ThAt DiSrEsPeCt I hEaR
💀💀 it’s really been like that recently 💀💀
and let's not forget the:
Me: is winning an argument with facts
Mom: "AnD I aM YoUr MoTHeR sO I sAy YoUr'e WRONG"
Moms be like: "i RaIsEd yOu"
So what you raised me. If you’re a dick to me most of my life then I have every right to be a bitch to you :)
That’s so my mom xD
Being an Asian kid , I can relate to all of these...and the worst part...if I try to stand up for myself....*WHOOPING BEGINS*
Agreed
Dominic Durant I agree, big picture planning. The younger you are the longer time feels relatively.
What age you are in high school feels a certain way and the thought of what life would be doubling that age seems as if it would be a another whole lifetime. Then when you're said age, you look back it doesn't seem as long as it did then. After that think of what life would be doubling that again. Those high school days will seem even shorter of a period experiencing anguish.
It's hard to not let your outer world affect you and dictate who you are and what you should do.
The first step is to make a solid plan of action. Once that is established, if you can maintain course, things should simply fall into place. Hopefully bringing about a sense of solace.
As the light gets bigger as you push ahead the darkness of the past gets smaller.
In general life is suffering. As rap artist lil Dicky put it "On Earth we go hard."
Try to muster the courage to be brave and you might experience things that you never thought could happen
ye I would get slapped to the other reality
My parents are asian and show almost all of these signs, I’ve told them that I don’t want to live with them bc they are abusive and now they are trying to be all nice so I won’t tell someone for help. I don’t want to do this anymore but idk what to do 😭
Never forget, ALWAYS stand up and speak up for yourself. Even if you can't do it now you will need it later
“Privacy is a privilege”
“I own you”
Dad: You and your mom go have a girl time in the bathroom."
Me: "The fuck you talking? That's perverted!"
Dad: "Well if you learn to use water and clean yourself. . . " (Just because they never see me in the bathroom, they accuse me of not being hygienic. I purposely use the bathroom whenever they aren't aware of it, because they always sneak into the bathroom when I am in the shower. Literally stalking me right outside of the shower. How can they not see that is extremely creepy and perverted.
Omg that's terrible, and I thought my mum barging into my room/ bathroom without knocking was bad. I'm sorry they do that
Indigo Talks bruh so true. My dad does the same thing except when lm in my room, the only chill place that l have.
I’m there(cuz lm mostly home alone). And I’m not there like 24/7 l get out as soon as l brush my teeth, take a shower, read. Then l get out. That’s literally all l do and then l got out to the living room.
As soon as he comes from work lm in my room, since l know he about to start to annoy me and lm probably recharging yet. And he goes: “ why aren’t you here, get out, GET OUT!!.
And let me tell you his voice is so annoying and so is my moms.
Look they argue everyday and my mom gets yelled at by him, he tells her some horrible stuff, and lm over here in my room listening to all this.
And since my mom is Dominican, she is of course staying with him after he cheated, talked to her like that etc.....since that’s how most girls are cuz of The 💶💸💸...
I just wish someone will relate as much.
I’m all about hopes.... oh and also (they constantly fat shame me, and so does my sister)
I’m also the youngest out of my 2 sisters.
Of them is on her 30s and one is 27 bout to be 28 soon 30. And it’s just too much for my poor little brain to handle.
@@indigotalks2034 damn leave your house now cuz your father could make fun of you and use you as his toy get the fuck out of there
@@indigotalks2034 oof. Creepy
My mom is literally controlling my life like it's HER story and hers only. As someone has told me before, "Your life is like a story, and you're the one writing it, and the people around you collaborate. But beware of abusive people, as they can change the course of your story." I wish I could see them again, since they taught me how to deal with my authoritarian mother and how to follow my authoritative father's helpful advice.
i cried so much when i heard that all of the video is a perfect description of my parents...
Kyle Broflovski same...
Kyle Broflovski Same here, I fucking hate my parents with a passion. Can’t wait till I move out
I still have 3 years to collage... Wish me luck i don't get brutally murdered before that.
Attention to all replys: I Never had abusive parents,BUT I do wish ALL of you guys good luck in finding a mentally healthy place to live. And that you find people who ACTUALLY care for you. You are able to escape your hell when the time is right. I hope that time is soon.
I would have cried if my my mom told me not to cry. Oh wow, that’s ironic
“They guilt trip you”
Me: sobs uncontrollably :,)
I would like but it has 69 likes
Frick
Now let it all out and say in your mind that every god damn thing will be fine.
There's that moment when they guilt trip you, but they call you hypocrite if you call them out or act like you're always blaming them for confrontations. Thus, using guilt tripping to dismiss claims of guilt tripping. "Am I being trolled right now?" is what I would ask if it were someone else.
Me: sobs uncontrollably with u*
the worst thing is when you know you’re being manipulated but you can’t do anything about it
I a while ago realized it and I couldn't do anything. For some reason, you respect them, yet they don't do same for you. That is strange...
That's right, most of the time you can't do nothing. In my case I get so dependent of my mom that I didn't realize that I'm being manipulated
Thats the definition of manipulativd
The worst thing is being so broken and co-dependent you're still stuck with the same situation as a young adult.
"I paid for you and shelter you, I can do whatever I want." Well, I feel like a human being before them.
"Tell them to back off"
No thanks, I choose life.
🤣🤣🤣
Same
You should feel confident about your life and your choices. Stand against them even if they hurt you.
Sid the Sloth, is that you?
I want to go to college but my parents are just like:
"You going to college???No way,you are going to be failure."
Than I say something like:
"Yeah,you can predict the future?"
My parents:
"How are you talking to your mother??"
Kiseli Senpai me : how can you tell your kid is gonna fail?
Kiseli Senpai me: you’re not me, so let me do what I enjoy and if I fail, then that’s okay!