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Why I don't go home for the holidays
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- Опубликовано: 15 авг 2024
- Want to SCALE your business? Go here: acquisition.com
Want to START a business? Go here: skool.com/games
If you’re new to my channel, my name is Alex Hormozi. I’m the founder and managing partner of Acquisition.com. It’s a family office, which is just a formal way of saying we invest our own money into companies. Our 10 portfolio companies bring in over $200,000,000+ per year. Our ownership stake varies between 20% and 100% of them. Given this is a YT channel, and anyone can claim anything, I’ll give you some stuff you can google to verify below.
How I got here…
21: Graduated Vanderbilt in 3 years Magna Cum Laude, and took a fancy consulting job.
23 yrs old: Left my fancy consulting job to start a business (a gym).
24 yrs old: Opened 5 gym locations.
26 yrs old: Closed down 6th gym. Lost everything.
26 yrs old: Got back to launching gyms (launched 33). Then, lost everything for a 2nd time.
26 yrs old: In desperation, started licensing model as a hail mary. It worked.
27 yrs old: "Gym Launch" does $3M profit the next 6 months. Then $17M profit next 12 months.
28 yrs old: Started Prestige Labs. $20M the first year.
29 yrs old: Launched ALAN, a software company for agencies to work leads for customers. Scaled to $1.7mmo within 6 months.
31 yrs old: Sold 75% of UseAlan to a strategic buyer in an all stock deal.
31 yrs old: Sold 66% of Gym Launch & Prestige Labs at $46.2M valuation in all-cash deal to American Pacific Group. (you can google it)
31 yrs old: Started our family office Acquisition.com. We invest and scale companies using the $42M in distributions we had taken + the cash from the $46.2M exit.
32 yrs old: Started making free content showing how we grow companies to make real business education accessible to everyone (and) to attract business owners to invest or scale their businesses.
34 yrs old: I became co-owner of Skool.com to help the many people who want to start a business online do so.
Today: Our portfolio now does $200M/yr between 10 companies. The largest doing $100M/yr the smallest doing $5M per year. Our ownership varies between 20% and 100% ownership of the companies. Many of them we invested in early and helped grow (which is how we make our money - not youtube videos).
To all the gladiators in the arena, we’re all in the middle of writing our own stories. The worse the monsters, the more epic the story.
You either get an epic outcome or an epic story. Both mean you win.
Keep crushing. May your desires be greater than your obstacles.
Never quit,
Alex
FULL DISCLOSURE
I make content to make money - just - on a longer time horizon than most. I want to build trust with business owners so we can find the best ones and help them scale. And if they’re awesome, write them a check and go all the way as partners.
![Why entrepreneurs stay broke and sad [trigger warning]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/gN--zZi3Nfc/mqdefault.jpg)
![$100M CEO: "Why therapists failed me..." [language warning]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/o7R_K6LwKNk/mqdefault.jpg)
Man, once I distanced myself from family members who never respected me. My life became more peaceful.
👍🏻
Same dude, I love my parents, but they worked paycheck to paycheck my whole life and don't understand anything about business at all
@@misukiylambertson2764 /
Same. My life is better without them. I know it is a taboo thing to admit about family, but they were utterly mean and resentful that I was doing well. They were just looking for ways to gouge me. I don't need that.
On the flip side, there might be a reason why they don't respect you, but totally hard to go from disrespected to respected but its possible. Hormozi talks about it in a video, he wasn't respected and his dad I believe said stop being an idiot, and he stopped drinking and learned to respect himself first.
One of my favorite quotes "Whatever you want to do in 6 months time, think, why can't I do it in 6 weeks time? Then do it in 6 days." Get started now.
That's amazing. Do you know where the quote comes from?
One of the biggest things I’ve learned from Alex is to be careful what you speak into existence. A subconscious mind is a powerful tool. Thank you for the wise words.
Agree 100%. I started meditating daily a few years ago, and can now feel thoughts bubbling up from my subconscious in a very visceral way. Its amazing to observe this and has made me realize that conditioning your subconscious is absolutely essential.
@@Col-T-Invest I need to get to this point. If you have any resources to share that have helped you, I'd appreciate it.
@@MadLadsAnonymous Did one this morning before my morning walk, in the early morning! Was amazing as always and i had a great and pretty relaxed day! I work hard too, i'm an entrepreneur in the financial services space and have plenty of challenges every day.
But having a good routine with meditation as a keystone... i' have really good days consistently, and good interactions with clients, business partners, employees etc. Its very rare i get stressed out at all now really. Meditation gives you a crucial 'gap' from your problems so you can see them in a more chilled out way, and my anxiety levels are much reduced, in addition to giving you that internal thought awareness i spoke about in my last post.
So anyway hope this download has been at least a little helpful! Love to hear how you get on 🙂
@@Col-T-Invest thanks for the insightful comment
I can relate to not wanting to see the family or old friends for the holidays. Some people trap you into this bubble of what they used to know you as. They never bothered to know you at your current state. It's awkward dealing with people that see you in that former lense.
So, so true. Great comment, sir.
@@xpicklepie Thank you
Been having this problem lately but have never heard it stated so clear
THIS! SO MUCH THIS. my mother and sister (I love them both and they aren't inherently bad people.) both refuse to see that I've grown past my flaws and insecurities I had as a child and constantly bring up "Remember when you were like this...." every time I try to communicate what I've learned. They also dismiss any proof, or subconsciously belittle my achievements now that I'm doing quite well for myself. Neither of them have achieved anything of note in their lives and are very much stuck in their ways since I was a kid. I wish them well, but I can't be around them any more..
@@beeboy6173 My exact situation. Damn.
All of my friends send me old pictures of the past when I was young and irresponsible and they always talk about the good Ole days. Those days mean very little to me now. I'm at a different level. I don't miss anything about the old days My best days are ahead of me!
This one hits hard. Gotta make tough decisions to keep growing.
yep. decouple from friends and family and go for it. ahead to nothingness. you will be the VICTOR! They will see... sell the house,car and wife... go all in 17hr's daily. idk man. this guy has alot of good points and speaks from a semi youthful standpoint. breaking relationships would be the absolute toughest for me.
I definitely relate to you saying if they weren't your family, you wouldn't ever associate with them.
When your family has the exact same problems as they did 20 years ago, that's a negative environment.
Being an entrepreneur teaches you that you can change yourself and your problems. So it's hard being around people who are convinced everything is everyone else's fault. And who are unwilling to change.
That’s literally the conversation I had with some family in regards to this holiday season.
@@LocsLikeChrist Let me guess, they thought YOU were the one with the problem?
"Being an entrepreneur teaches you that you can change yourself and your problems. So it's hard being around people who are convinced everything is everyone else's fault. And who are unwilling to change."
Mark Douglas kind of says almost the same thing in one of his seminars. replacing "entrepreneur" with "good trader".
I relate to your comment wholeheartedly
Do you mind if I share your quote?
My friend group from high school is convinced that I’m the same person I was in high school. They don’t congratulate the fact that I quit drinking. They don’t celebrate the fact that I am not afraid to walk a different path. And they still live in our home town. This hit hard, thank you!
Congrats mate, keep sober
Good for you brother. The opposite of courage is not cowardliness, but conformity. Stay strong, and be who you want to be
Nothing wrong with someone living in their hometown.
Going from an eating disorder, to heavy addiction, to dropping out of school and spending years of my life in conflict with family, I completely relate to this. Even being many years from that, after graduating in engineering and starting a successful business, I feel those feelings hard when I have to go back.
Families are like gears. When one gear rotates, they all rotate in a certain direction.. take one out, the gears will not run the same. Even after years of change and improvement, those gears will rotate in that same direction once you put yourself back in there. The worst part in my opinion is when others who haven't changed just try to pull you down to their level.
I'd like to see those family members do better for themselves, but they need to take care of that on their own. I'd rather stay far away improving myself than go back and be bothered by it.
Thank you Alex. I feel this one, deeply. At the end of the day it's not so much about abandoning family, as some might see it, but about simply setting boundaries on disrespect and negativity, and getting clear on what values and beliefs we want to be surrounded by.
Totally appreciate this vid. Solidifying my choices for moving away from 9-5'er family n friends who are always in their ruts trying to drag you back in/judge you/ snub you cuz of your stepping out to fulfill a vision while they just satisfy a need. Thanks a bunch AGAIN, Alex!
I don't have a problem with 9 to 5 people and vice versa. We happy for each other's decisions
I made the decision to get lean for a community showcase with my gymbros and every time I see my family they say things like “don’t lose any more weight” it’s really frustrating, like I’m not losing weight on accident. I’m working really hard to accomplish a goal. I have a difficult time responding to those comments but I need to manage those boundaries. ❤
Love how this content is geared towards business but can be applied to anything you chose to be successful in
This is SO personal and real to me. People have ALWAYS misinterpreted who i am, and with time, it's gotten worse. They've lived the SAME 20+ years since high school, and they're stuck in the same paradigm and running off of the same information. Im not the person they thought i was, and I'm DEFINITELY not who i really was 20 years ago.
I began observing this phenomena years ago of people attempting to put me in the 'historical' box that they (emotionally) NEEDed me to remain in so they can validate their lack of emotional/intellectual/financial progress. It's crazy how people project their own mental framework on others to validate their existence.
Bingo ^
Bro I fuc**** feel you. This is why I hate going back to Oklahoma to see my family. “I feel like I’m going backwards” EVERYTIME!
Then don’t just FaceTime them once a week/month
I'm sad to say but you probably are going backwards. Man, I have sooooooo much pain and wasted decades from my family of origin.
It’s funny how we resonate with this shit lol
Here is my favorite quote: just because someone is related doesn’t mean they are a family
@@samtavoosian3059 Facts.
@@movingonandup322 yes
Literally thought I was the only one that felt this way. Thank you for doing this video.
I really appreciate this. I just articulated this to myself in the last month.
"I don't want your thoughts in my head"
This is literally my exact issue , this is spooky and serendipitous! I needed to hear this as I'm working through whether I can continue to be friends with someone I've known for a long time and I feel I am another person.
Here’s a belief I have… when Alex Hormozi drops a video, it delivers.
Alex, this is the 1st time I'm writing a comment below your video. Just letting you know, that lately your every single video surpassed my expectations and it's beyond the value that I get elsewhere on RUclips. No shit, your videos often turn into notes that I review when needed. Thanks and greetings from Lithuania. 🇱🇹
Colombia is also in the house 🇨🇴 🇨🇴🇨🇴🇨🇴🇨🇴🇨🇴🇨🇴
This video was f’ing sooooooooo liberating. I ALMOST thought I was being a little too hardcore with my standards.
Once again, thank you Alex! You are a breathe of fresh air coming out of the trenches of entrepreneurship to check myself constantly.
You are THE man!
Man, I really appreciate this. I stumbled into that mindset a few years ago, and the clarity was crazy. I fell back into the cave for years and I've been struggling to get back out. This vid was a flashlight and I know what to do next. Much love ❤️
Good for you. This his true in so many levels. It's battling toxic relationships 101. Regardless of intent, these behaviors will not be tolerated anywhere else. Family should be no exception. You can still love but also command respect. Respect in who you are now and respect in positive energy.
I've listened to tons of Hormozi videos and own both books. Learned a ton. This is 1 of my favorite vids so far, and I'm listening to it 2.5 years after it was uploaded. Thx Alex.
This is one of your most lucid ruminations on a secret inner belief pattern that all of us have, but few of us can articulate. Kudos sir.
Loved this one. It makes me even more grateful for my family. My mom always spoke life into me. I’m going to take a closer look at my self talk and self beliefs. Thanks for sharing your gifts.
I can only say this... DUDE YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION TO THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK! 👌👏
I had to distance myself from family for a couple of years, didn’t realize how much my headspace was affected till I did. Even now, reconnecting, I’m valuing the importance of teaching people how to treat me like you mentioned. Thanks for this video
I like the idea of not seeing family until I've done the self-development needed to be in a place where I feel I can't be Triggered by anyone period. And then, I'd go back for the holidays just to test that. And I'd probably have a session lined up with my success coach just afterward as well to help rinse off any and all potential things that I might have been triggered by or might have picked up.
Julien Blanc - Once you can no longer be triggered by anything, only then are you completely freed.
So proud of you! Remember, you don't marry into a family, you create your own family
Holy shit I am so happy to hear someone else feels this and it’s not just me overreacting.
That’s so great. Escaping from the old identity has been the hardest thing for me. This video helped me a lot. Awesome ☺️
Thank you! This is exactly how I have been feeling for years and I never had a way to put it into words.
This video caused me to be immediately more introspective than I normally am. A lot of thoughts on my own family and situation. I see where you're coming from but you're are also missing a few pieces of the puzzle. Not that you should take abuse but rather be more understanding. You needed and may continue to need to manage your space because you are attempting to achieve great things. I also think you will continue to change as you walk down the path you chose and eventually soften as you shed more and more of your previous insecurities. I hope you arrive at a place where you just let these things roll off you in future instead of a constant need to be guarded. A place of of relaxed strength rather than frenetic stimulus response. Although from my own experience with my family and loved ones much easier said than done.
My god how much wisdom in this video! Seriously hit hard. Took notes to remind myself always
Tears are forming in my eyes…I spoke for the past 3 months what I needed “by the end of 2023”…it’s 29 December 2023 and a friend sent Me this video as I am sitting here questioning Myself. My friend doesn’t know what I have been carrying. Thank you for “the chains chosen to tie Myself in.”
Appreciate this Alex! When I first heard you talk about this, it gave me a huge sense of peace ☮️ and reassurance in my heart that I was not being obtuse to my “family’s needs” just because I started to tune into what I needed for my mental & emotional health. Haven’t gone home for the holidays in a few years because of my family’s lack of growth. Didn’t realize how much their negative Nancy words spoken over me affected my personal growth & aspirations until you first presented this to the gym launch crew a few years back. 💯
This was so good and so on point. I can't even tell you how you nailed ALL of this. Thank you!
this channel is a God-send.. Alex has so much wisdom that anyone can take advantage of! life changing to say the absolute least!
Wow, appreciate that youtube put this in front of me as topic is so timely
This is great, I don’t have have friends back at home so no one knows me whatsoever. My mindset is much higher than it was years ago and I keep growing while most of everyone I knew is still stuck in my hometown. If you believe you’ve outgrown everyone and you’re on top, that’s how you become a better version of yourself no one can see because they’re still the same.
As always a great post Alex. I'd like to add a different perspective to the aggressively opposing family put downs. The way i get around it is imagine if someone that doesnt know you says negative things about you. What do you do? You ignore it right. Because they dont know you. The same as your family, they remember how you were 10 years ago they probably dont know you now. If you love your family member and they say something neg about you. Especially something that was true but now isnt. Simply dont take it to heart, dont give it any power over you, and calmy say yeah i was like that 10 years ago but i havent done that since blah blah. Aggressively opposing it kind of adds fuel to the fire when you really want to throw a bucket of ice warer on it. Remember something only becomes offensive if you choose to be offended. Thank you Alex I'm really grateful for all your video's.
This is good advice and an excellent interpretation. I'm hoping that it's probably what he actually meant as well. Otherwise, this video can easily breed snowflakes that whine that the way they feel is always because of what someone else said about them.
💯 I cannot believe how right you are. My sister always reminds me of my old self😮
This is MONEY !! I can definitely resonate with this whole video. I am trying to move abroad to continue my business since I feel stuck in a low mindset around friends and family.
Alex is so spot on. Glad I found this channel.
OMG! An immigrant here. - That is exactly how I feel! I thought I was a horrible person for not wanting to home for holidays, like I am denouncing my roots or that I am insecure if I can't brush off those unwelcome comments you are mentioning. But it's such an energy drain. Thank you for sharing your stance on this!
Alex Hormozi, the only channel where I click on the video before I’ve even looked at the title or thumbnail because I’m so damn excited to watch.
Brilliant Alex, here's my takeaways:
- When you feel weird during a conversation, stop analyze and bring up
- some people choose to make less money on purpose but unconsciously
- we often question all the beliefs that we have except the ones we've internalized
- what false belief is keeping you from growing bigger and faster
Wow! This was something that I didn't know I needed to hear. Appreciate it!
this has been the best video ive watched in years! you've motivated me to take a step forward in my life thanks Alex
I completely relate. Most people want to remain losers and you can’t allow that around yourself.
Alex, you continue to share such great wisdom from life experience and connections you've drawn; you have a talent for putting it all together.
"The beliefs that we really believe are the beliefs we don't see..."
I packed a 16 ft truck, and towed my car 3,000 miles to get away from family and the small, small minded town I’m from, in order to become who I’m truly meant to be. Haven’t been back home since. I love my mama, but we can take vacations together (5-7 days), and I can go back to my peace. People always want to remember you for your yesterdays. I’m loving my journey. I’m loving who I’m becoming. 🥰
One of my favorite things about this channel is the little sayings he shares. Gold nugget sayings.
The one in this video was,
We question all of our beliefs
Except the ones we truly believe
And those we never question at all
Words cannot describe how much I resonate with this.
Same feelings! So glad I found your channel. Appreciate the value you continually add for free and your passion in entrepreneurship. Eagles fly alone. Let's close q4 right
Thank you Alex! This helped me! I'm going to move forward! Thank you, Alex!
Allow them to have the same idea of you, and just keep growing! I don't like being with family members anymore too but we can all grow and keep pushing
Man you nailed it with this one! I decided to skip going home this year for all of these reasons.
For 5-10 years straight, I’ve had relatives comment on how I didn’t have long hair anymore and were surprised I had shorter hair. These were mainly people 40yo and up.
You’d think they’d catch on by year 4 or 5
Hard for people to recognize the surface level change. Deeper level would even be more strange to them.
Alex, you knocked it out of the park again. I sincerely thank you for sharing the insight.
This is about changing paradigms that we're given as children..
Thanks for this... I am very lucky because my immediate family is changing along with me, but I've been feeling this with friends lately and have been extra hard on myself for being a "bad friend" for having these feelings... Seems that I am neither a bad friend nor alone in this aspect.
Thanks I feel a lot less guilty now about not wanting to connect with old friends
I’ve never heard this articulated so perfectly but it’s how I’ve always felt. I’ll need that extra week to untangle after a week with the family. May just have to start skipping those visits. Thanks!
Your words are gold man... Thank you for the positive impact on so many people. You are doing the world a huge favor
"WaLk With Strength And Conviction Into The Future We Choose To Create"...Thank You So Much For Your Content!! I Appreciate This Video And CompLeteLy Agree With The VaLue Our BeLiefs Have In Designing Our ReaLity...I Am Receiving And ImpLementing Your Advice From Another Video About Addressing The Comments ImmediateLy...I FeeL This Is Important As Otherwise It Kinda Just Keeps CircuLating In Your Mind And Infusing ItseLf Into Your Environments...I Am So Happy For You To Be Experiencing Such Amazing Continued Success And Love That It Is Happening For Someone With A Desire To Share And Improve Lives For Others.Thanks!!
Yes! 🙌 going through that right now. Had about 3 to 4 snakes removed from my life very quickly. Kind of crazy how normal people turn into “agents” before you even know it.
My case is absolutely different, my and my wife's families are pleasure to see, always supportive, no negativity at all etc. I understand it may be the case in some families, but actually surprised how many people do resonate with what Alex is saying in this video.
You are very fortunate on this subject.
That is a blessing indeed. Stay close to them.
The issue that happens is you want to share in growth, share in the glory of attaining something with those you care or have cared about at times. How can you grow in the same pond you’ve always been in tho, is very true
Welcome to my household man. Appreciate this video.
If I take any more notes,I'm going to need a new pack of pens!!!🤣🤣
Man, I gotta say that I really appreciate your content. I appreciate that it's free too which means to me that you genuinely care about people upgrading themselves. I recently realized how stuck I was a few years ago, and I've been grinding out of that. One of the heaviest anchors has been my connections from the past (mostly childhood friends). It's interesting that I took it on myself to get some solid separation from them in order to grow, and then you come out with this video properly articulating that type of situation. I want to work on being aggressively opposed to folks old perception of me, but before that I'm gonna keep working on myself. Thanks for this video, and I hope you have a great week. Happy holidays!
Thank You - I really needed that video today💪
100% know what you're talking about. Great video.
Alex ur older videos are starigh gold. one of the best advise one will find for general bussines and the path of an entrepreneur thank u my guy
Had early thanksgiving today. “Combatted” those labels with comebacks that I had pre prepared. Thanks for the timely video
I am glad to have family that sees and respects my growth.
Not all family members, but most of them do!
Finally, someone put it in the right words. Thank you so much for this....
Fantastic video. The wisdom here is outstanding. Incredible value. Thank you.
Man amazing video! I’ve recently come to the conclusion that I can’t be around my family because I reacted poorly to my dad not being around and put crippling pressure on myself to be the male role model of the household from the time I was a toddler. I’ve made the decision. I’m saving 10k and moving to somewhere in the us(I’m Canadian). It was a very hard decision and I don’t make it lightly. My family are good people but the reality is they make me worse to be around.
The best two years of my life personally was when I was 13&14 and started highschool. I was in separate schools than my younger brother & cousin and for the first time felt like I had 6 hours a day where I didn’t put all that pressure on myself. And it was easy not to. The next year my little brother joined me and I instantly felt all that crushing pressure and socially ostisized myself big time for the rest of school.
Every year starting now will be even better. Thank you Alex!
Yeah I agree, being a successful role model can feel great, but being a failed role model can hurt so much. That's why when my dad died, I felt like I had a real responsibility to start winning at life and inspire and uplift my younger brother with the actions that I take everyday. I never knew this before, but he's always looked up to me. Before I moved out, he told me his mindset had changed a lot from being around me. So keep it up!!!
Listening to this as I’m headed home for the holiday. Very spot on perspective and it’s something I’m going to be aware of while I’m home
7:42 identify is fluid. You can change in an instant.
9:15 you can move quickly. You can change right now.
Alex this one was BOMB!
Well said. This hit home so hard. I moved away over 6 years ago and have the most uncomfortable feeling going home at times. And I never could really interpret the emotion. This video broke it down pretty well. I hate the feeling of being put back into the box of who I once was.
Please define what Greed is ?Time is no one's friend and sometimes your family needs that time because we only here for so long and you can't take the money with you at the end of your journey!
unfortunately, I think a lot of us needed to hear this at this time...
Wow, tysm Alex!
Wow this is hitting. I’ve become completely intolerant to the same things especially with family. I truly thought I had to accept and or work through those things. Smh..
Sometimes the people who will take a bullet for you, are the same ones holding the gun to your head.
Do not listen to family or submit to the family guilt...or guilt in general. Guilt is a way people make you feel bad to get you to do things they want you to do.
Truth!
Friends and family will *always* hold you back.
"And the earth becomes my throne
I adapt to the unknown
Under wandering stars I've grown
By myself but not alone
I ask no one
And my ties are severed clean
The less I have the more I gain
Off the beaten path I reign"
THANK YOU ALEX FOR EXPLAINING THIS, FOR PUTTING TOGETHER THOSE THOUGHTS TOGETHER 🔥
Bro, your videos need to be paid for. Keep it up. Watching your videos from a part of the world you probably don't think of. All the best Alex
The title provoked me to watch the video. To me It totally makes sense. It's difficult to spend time with people that have hard time accepting how you've changed.
It's good to know that I'm not the only one who experienced those thoughts. I love your content Alex, really can relate to ;>
As negative as those family members can be you are still a role model for them whether they admit it or not. They may be jealous, they may be - etc. but at the end of the day they probably need you in their lives. I will challenge anybody to stay in touch with her family or at least with the people that care about them and respect them.
Thank you for this! I truly appreciate you.
💥💥💥 Great perspective Alex, I agree 💯 %
Real talk. Appreciate it, agree 100%