Getting safety advice from 1994

Поделиться
HTML-код
  • Опубликовано: 28 сен 2021
  • Thank you Magic Spoon for sponsoring this video. Use the code brutalmoose for $5 off or go to magicspoon.thld.co/brutalmoos... to save $5 off your order today!
    This video is as safe as a solid wood-core front door.
    www.brutalmoose.com
    My second channel » / moose2
    Support me on Patreon » / brutalmoose
    Background music provided by Epidemic Sound.
  • РазвлеченияРазвлечения

Комментарии • 1,7 тыс.

  • @Antigen__
    @Antigen__ 2 года назад +1544

    To be fair, crouching down to pick up valuables scattered all over the floor opens you up to a swift roundhouse kick to the head.

    • @jacksonpercy8044
      @jacksonpercy8044 2 года назад +86

      Or a stilleto heel to the face.

    • @kilgoretrout4491
      @kilgoretrout4491 2 года назад +16

      Or you could just shoot her to avoid getting in that situation.

    • @Vrikrar
      @Vrikrar 2 года назад +162

      Never lower your head to your victim, as they will surely deliver a powerful double axe-handle maneuver to your exposed neck, severely hindering your ability to pick up scattered valuables.

    • @lemmingscanfly5
      @lemmingscanfly5 2 года назад +12

      I honestly probably would boot them in the head and start stomping on them, but I am a man, and a schizo.

    • @katc2040
      @katc2040 2 года назад +45

      @@kilgoretrout4491 I think most people don't realize that most human beings don't want to kill another person, even if they are a thief.

  • @badrat484
    @badrat484 2 года назад +1011

    Purse Snatcher: “Ew, floor money. I’m outta here.”

    • @valeriazaragoza375
      @valeriazaragoza375 2 года назад +59

      Lol the point is though that criminals have in their mind how a robbery should go and if you do something like this to throw them off-script they will usually panic and bail.

    • @zapawillie
      @zapawillie 2 года назад +33

      I’m not gonna eat money off the floor!

    • @nintendo-relatedchannel5810
      @nintendo-relatedchannel5810 2 года назад +26

      @@valeriazaragoza375 You have to throw 'em off their rhythm!

    • @endlesswanderer1753
      @endlesswanderer1753 2 года назад +23

      @@valeriazaragoza375 "You threw off my groove!" ~ The Criminal

    • @Samsquamsh
      @Samsquamsh 2 года назад

      victim fuckery works man.

  • @phyroscire5817
    @phyroscire5817 2 года назад +442

    "Always avoid isolation, especially at night." Wouldn't we all love that lol

    • @josefgordon7712
      @josefgordon7712 2 года назад +3

      Triggered!

    • @gracekim25
      @gracekim25 2 года назад +1

      Avoid isolation…eh😅

    • @shabath
      @shabath 2 года назад +3

      For the time being, please do not avoid isolation.

    • @ericbeilmann3649
      @ericbeilmann3649 2 года назад +12

      Suddenly memories of Ian's Yukon trail review come to mind for some reason: "I notice that you don't have a partner" "You should get yourself a partner"

    • @AS-fu1kd
      @AS-fu1kd 2 года назад +1

      I've been waiting all day for the night so i can isolate myself

  • @WCtheComedian
    @WCtheComedian 2 года назад +355

    Dear Police: I'm leaving town for a couple days. Sincerely, Ian

    • @joehosier6187
      @joehosier6187 2 года назад +11

      He has to get himself a fat butt implant in his butt surgery. Cuz butt

    • @2yearoldeastercandy935
      @2yearoldeastercandy935 2 года назад +42

      Dear police, can you water my plants and feed my cat while I’m away? Hugs and kisses, (signature)

    • @breannajefferson912
      @breannajefferson912 2 года назад +27

      It's funny, because if you did that now the cops would think you're about to commit a crime and are setting up an elaborate alibi.

    • @StarkMaximum
      @StarkMaximum 2 года назад +19

      "What the fuck, the _police_ robbed me."

    • @Remember_Baker
      @Remember_Baker Год назад +8

      @@StarkMaximum Shouldn't of left that big note on my front door that said "leaving town for a couple days. brb tho lol."

  • @Zenlore6499
    @Zenlore6499 2 года назад +906

    “It’s important that you view this tape regularly”
    Yeah, to maintain your paranoia about Blue-Shirt-Sunglasses McGee.

    • @Antigen__
      @Antigen__ 2 года назад +58

      Sunglasses McGee: He's gonna make all the money now ✅
      Blue-Shirt Sunglasses McGee: He's gonna steal all the money now ❌

    • @JoshuaJacobs83
      @JoshuaJacobs83 2 года назад +25

      It’s 2021, if you aren’t living in fear every day, you’re doing something wrong

    • @danelykins4409
      @danelykins4409 2 года назад +7

      HEY BLUE SHIRT IS REAL
      PEOPLE SAY HE ISN'T BUT HE IS
      I SAW HIM AT VONS ONCE

    • @Antigen__
      @Antigen__ 2 года назад +8

      @LTrain45 45 Who's gonna tell him

    • @allegedlyfalse6779
      @allegedlyfalse6779 2 года назад +13

      Blue-Shirt Sunglasses McGee, the cool dude who's hobbies include: stalking and robbing women at gun point, jacking cars, burglarizing houses, kidnapping children, and being a cool dude. Also, he has sunglasses and a blue shirt, which explains the first part of his name.

  • @LaughBoys
    @LaughBoys 2 года назад +1858

    Glad to see nothing has changed in the world of safety since 1994. I still wrap my wallet in three layers of thick rubber bands. Takes me a few extra minutes to pay at Trader Joe's but at least no one can steal my wallet and immediately open it in front of me!

    • @ElysianAura
      @ElysianAura 2 года назад +143

      "Quick! Open your wallet and give me all the cash"
      "Oh just give me a minute, I was going for the world record for rubber band balls with it as a base"

    • @nukiradio
      @nukiradio 2 года назад +62

      @@ElysianAura _mexican standoff between a robber and a man's wallet that has been rubber banded shut by like 50 rubber bands_

    • @BusinessZeus
      @BusinessZeus 2 года назад +4

      I disagree, "Nothing" from God lives underwater has *NOT* changed. I don't understand why you told me how to rob you.

    • @user-or6yn8pm3c
      @user-or6yn8pm3c 2 года назад +6

      I'd say America felt safer back then than today. We never worried so much for our safety like today.

    • @LJMC80
      @LJMC80 2 года назад +16

      No to rain on everyone's memes but the rubber band thing was to deter pickpockets, as the rubber band was supposed to make the wallet harder to remove.

  • @pepdog1
    @pepdog1 2 года назад +347

    "He just did exactly what the tape told him not to do and he was totally fine; no incident!"
    what this tape fails to tell you about is the secret safety technique; have a film crew around you at all times

  • @salemite
    @salemite 2 года назад +151

    The advice for being followed is way simpler. Take odd routes rather than a direct route. If the car keeps with you than it isn't just coincidence anymore as no one is going to take a bunch of unnecessary turns just like you unless they are following you.

    • @randytrashcan
      @randytrashcan 2 года назад +32

      Yep. And if they're still following you, start driving to a police station and phone them ahead of time to let them know you're being followed and will arrive shortly.

    • @BlueSparxLPs
      @BlueSparxLPs 2 года назад +26

      Another trick I've heard, along the same lines as the "odd route," is to drive all the way around the block until you're back where you started from. If someone isn't following you, they'll break off at some point before you complete the full circle.

  • @ireallydidntwanttomakeanac575
    @ireallydidntwanttomakeanac575 2 года назад +682

    "If you arrive to find that your home is being burglarized, use common sense. Don't go inside. Allow your burglars to steal precious belongings that you have hidden in every corner, nook and cranny of the home. Allow your children to be kidnapped and terrorized by burglars. Do not call the police. Just leave the house and start a new life. Just make sure that you have your copy of this tape in your glove compartment"

    • @nukiradio
      @nukiradio 2 года назад +26

      Home Alone:

    • @arfazia3897
      @arfazia3897 2 года назад +6

      Thank you, now I know what to do!

    • @SushiLord89
      @SushiLord89 2 года назад +25

      This is the Canada's suggestion on what to do when dealing with a home breakin. No, I'm not joking. The other option is to hide and let them do what they want. Do not resist, or call for help. That includes any emergency number.

    • @kilbert666
      @kilbert666 2 года назад +25

      Not calling the cops is retarded but like... Yeah. The best way to not get hurt by a criminal is generally to give them what they want, unless what they want is to hurt you. In which case, you're already gonna get hurt, so fight like hell

    • @logitech4873
      @logitech4873 2 года назад +4

      This is what I do with spiders

  • @KarmicXRestrictions
    @KarmicXRestrictions 2 года назад +366

    Safety deposit box? I thought I wasn't supposed to go to the bank?!

    • @senbrandybuck4492
      @senbrandybuck4492 2 года назад +63

      You can go to the bank, you just can’t go alone. Everyone needs a bank buddy and a gym coach whistle

    • @BBC600
      @BBC600 2 года назад +22

      @@senbrandybuck4492 If the bank is so dangerous but I'm supposed to do most of my banking by mail is it safe to use the post office? This video tape doesn't seem to have a postal safety section. 😉

    • @senbrandybuck4492
      @senbrandybuck4492 2 года назад +19

      @@BBC600 bank logic applies: phone a friend. Everyone needs a bank buddy, a post office pal, a pharmacy friend, a cafe comrade, etc.

    • @SirChubbyBunny
      @SirChubbyBunny 2 года назад +9

      But it's okay! If you make a mistake by going to the bank to use a safety deposit box, you can always go back the next business day :D
      Wait...

    • @Iamafishproductions
      @Iamafishproductions 2 года назад +26

      The robbery random encounter is only triggered when you approach the ATM. If you use the quicksave glitch to clip through the walls of the bank furthest from the ATM, you'll be able to access the safety deposit boxes without triggering the encounter. These are usually safe, non-respawning containers, unless you're using the buggy 2008 patch for the U.S. economy.

  • @moetatoes
    @moetatoes 2 года назад +88

    About calling the police when going out of town - I lived in a REALLY sketchy part of town. To the point, where I had called the non emergent line to get the teens from banging on my door and waiting on my porch step after 9pm waiting for me. Once I was going on a six day trip and had cameras up. But I wasn't already paranoid enough, so I called the non emergent line and they had a patrol car drive by like twice while I was away. It made me feel a little better that if something happened there was a report that I tried to have it protected.

  • @mn_twisted4319
    @mn_twisted4319 2 года назад +91

    I feel like in the 90’s everything was just oblivion npc’s

  • @bleasher
    @bleasher 2 года назад +566

    The fact that I am viewing this video is proof of my concern and acknowledgement of the serious crime problem we are all faced with today.

    • @nukiradio
      @nukiradio 2 года назад +10

      The fact that he is viewing that is proof of his concern and acknowledgment...

    • @Mrnotpib
      @Mrnotpib 2 года назад +10

      The fact The fact that I’m that I’m viewing is viewing is proof of proof of my concern my concern and acknowledgement and acknowledgment

    • @nicoledoubleyou
      @nicoledoubleyou 2 года назад +6

      @@Mrnotpib reading this gave me a stroke

    • @asbestos464
      @asbestos464 2 года назад +3

      @@nicoledoubleyou stroke gave reading this a me

    • @alakazamlover4908
      @alakazamlover4908 2 года назад +1

      @@asbestos464 me gave stroke to this reading

  • @Sean_Bird
    @Sean_Bird 2 года назад +295

    I don’t know if I can trust safety information from 1994. If it was from 1995, then maybe.

    • @oisinsaxon3054
      @oisinsaxon3054 2 года назад +30

      "This safety information seems a bit moldy, doesn't it?"

    • @ariellaweb123
      @ariellaweb123 2 года назад +12

      naw man 1996 is where it's at

    • @Dexth_Jsm
      @Dexth_Jsm 2 года назад +12

      @@oisinsaxon3054 I think my safety advice has spoiled
      :(

    • @CardboardSliver
      @CardboardSliver 2 года назад +6

      I prefer Safety Advice from 1997. Much more modern.

    • @Arbiter099
      @Arbiter099 2 года назад +5

      1984 was the peak of safety

  • @TheChrisHype
    @TheChrisHype 2 года назад +157

    I get the feeling that Ian accepts sponsorship from those who he already happens to have a hilarious costume for.

  • @donniemills967
    @donniemills967 2 года назад +47

    Ian is growing his hair out to cover his back pocket to discourage pick pockets.

  • @Samouraii
    @Samouraii 2 года назад +218

    I was born in 1994 and I've never been a victim of any of these crimes. Clearly this tape had a huge impact on safety

    • @Deoxys_Used_Mimic
      @Deoxys_Used_Mimic 2 года назад +20

      It’s funny because the video never showed an infant being robbed.
      The video was made in 1994, *for people living in 1994.*
      What? Did you come out the womb at the ripe ‘ol age of 35?
      I was born in 1994 and I don’t recall sh*t because I was a *baby.*
      Those robbers must’ve stolen my memory.

    • @linkskywalker5417
      @linkskywalker5417 2 года назад +3

      @@Deoxys_Used_Mimic What next? Did the robbers go present those memories to Mansex to make a test replica?

    • @Deoxys_Used_Mimic
      @Deoxys_Used_Mimic 2 года назад +2

      @@linkskywalker5417
      Possibly, but you might wanna ask the Ancient Greeks that question first.
      Oh, and while you’re at it... can you also ask the Egyptians why you look just like your Mother’s Brother?

    • @Schnipah
      @Schnipah 2 года назад +1

      I was born in 99’ and have been shot at once and been chased down by a homeless guy trying to mug my friend and I, so your mileage may vary.

  • @RetropixleDS
    @RetropixleDS 2 года назад +380

    "The door can beat the door with the inactive door with the top and bottom of the door".
    truly, I feel safer knowing this. Thanks moose.

    • @nukiradio
      @nukiradio 2 года назад +1

      Mappy.
      All I need to say

    • @sethsez
      @sethsez 2 года назад +14

      That bit felt like getting construction advice from Neil Cicierega.

    • @SirChubbyBunny
      @SirChubbyBunny 2 года назад +3

      Someone needs to make a Letterboxd page for this gem and we can make the door bit our inside joke.

  • @hannatude
    @hannatude 2 года назад +61

    I legitimately thought that “Magic Spoon” was a weird 90’s commercial parody bit until Ian mentioned the company’s website.

  • @ivangordy8957
    @ivangordy8957 2 года назад +139

    I loved your half-assed attempt at convincing us Magic Spoon doesn't taste like garbage.

    • @SuperSisby
      @SuperSisby 2 года назад +1

      Didn't he have a video reviewing it? Or was that another RUclipsr? I can't find his video, unfortunately.

    • @ivangordy8957
      @ivangordy8957 2 года назад +33

      @@SuperSisby It was either Danny Gonzales or Drew Gooden... I THINK.

    • @StoutShako
      @StoutShako 2 года назад +18

      I got suckered in with the last ad he did for them and now I have trust issues. At least they honored their 100% satisfaction guaranteed offer. Now I just have to figure out what to do with the boxes of trash cereal I can barely stomach without contributing to rampant food waste...

    • @scotttalkington323
      @scotttalkington323 2 года назад +14

      @@StoutShako compost

    • @CommanderViviax
      @CommanderViviax 2 года назад +24

      @@SuperSisby Drew Gooden did it. As part of his buy wierd adverts for a month, video. The Magic Spoon part was grisly.

  • @BenjamminFranklin.
    @BenjamminFranklin. 2 года назад +536

    I work as a security guard. “Maintain adequate lighting” is SUPER important. Easily one of the best things you can do to keep your shit from getting stolen. It doesn’t matter if it involves pestering your city to fix the broken streetlight outside your home or getting some motion activated flood lights. If the criminal can get into your home or business and get away I’m the dark then they are more likely to try. Both home and businesses should follow this advice

    • @caty0000
      @caty0000 2 года назад +42

      I read that as moron activated lights lol

    • @kilgoretrout8896
      @kilgoretrout8896 2 года назад +3

      @Courage wrong; it's better with ben

    • @robertschnobert9090
      @robertschnobert9090 2 года назад +15

      Most burglars breaking into single family homes do so during the day. At least around here, maybe it's different in the US.

    • @linkskywalker5417
      @linkskywalker5417 2 года назад +4

      @@robertschnobert9090 What country do you live in?

    • @kaemincha
      @kaemincha 2 года назад +27

      @@robertschnobert9090 Even in the US, most burglaries happen during the day!

  • @ruby.the.weirdo
    @ruby.the.weirdo 2 года назад +816

    I love Ian's new Hobo-Bohemian style fashion. It suits his personality very well!

    • @jrjr648
      @jrjr648 2 года назад +101

      _Hobohemian_

    • @Its_Me_Romano
      @Its_Me_Romano 2 года назад +37

      He looks like he drives a Chevy Astrovan

    • @gaminglol1167
      @gaminglol1167 2 года назад +49

      He looks like the funny stoner guy that reads the haunted book out of curiosity

    • @i_teleported_bread7404
      @i_teleported_bread7404 2 года назад +4

      @@jrjr648 Ya might need to rephrase that lol.

    • @YOjeremyRaps
      @YOjeremyRaps 2 года назад +24

      Hoboboho

  • @Sniperbear13
    @Sniperbear13 2 года назад +56

    the whole remember the persons hair cut and color is actually something that is very useful, but you want to do more then that, the more details the better.

  • @elizabeth_404
    @elizabeth_404 2 года назад +39

    "Gee, I hope no one robs me at gunpoint today." -me, every day

  • @googaboogaloo
    @googaboogaloo 2 года назад +352

    I love that the car jacker is wearing a poison shirt.

    • @Belgand
      @Belgand 2 года назад +20

      Just talk dirty to him.

    • @TheQuickSilver101
      @TheQuickSilver101 2 года назад +5

      I completely missed that. I need to go back and re-watch it!

    • @crh71288
      @crh71288 2 года назад +23

      Every carjacker sings a sad sad song 🎶

    • @Iamafishproductions
      @Iamafishproductions 2 года назад +5

      What's got him so jumpy? Why can't he stand still?
      Like gasoline he wants to...steal her car. And leave.

    • @AnthroFox99
      @AnthroFox99 2 года назад +12

      Sounds like subliminal messages of rock=criminal.

  • @Wilderness-Will
    @Wilderness-Will 2 года назад +1275

    Ian, I love that you keep doing these VHS and retro "cultural tutorial" videos even if the Almighty Algorithm doesn't embrace them as much as Brutalfoods content. Thank you for helping to document some of wonderfully weird aspects of American culture from the late '80s to early '00s.

    • @aaronjames3228
      @aaronjames3228 2 года назад +13

      I got recommended it

    • @Aster_Risk
      @Aster_Risk 2 года назад +16

      I don't really like the food videos, but I love these.

    • @elegantdisarray
      @elegantdisarray 2 года назад +23

      I really miss Televoid

    • @Wilderness-Will
      @Wilderness-Will 2 года назад +24

      ​@@elegantdisarray Same! I imagine the reason he stopped doing it is because Televoid videos would net like 350k views, while video game reviews and Brutualfoods stuff was getting 800k-3mil.
      I understand that sometimes tough calls gotta be made, but Televoid is what got me hooked on Brutalmoose. Since then I've stuck around mostly because Ian has one of the most amusing editing and presentation styles I've ever seen on RUclips.

    • @elegantdisarray
      @elegantdisarray 2 года назад +6

      @@Wilderness-Will Absolutely agree. He has the most unique style and quality, I could watch him review anything ✌

  • @1MockingJay
    @1MockingJay 2 года назад +68

    the door segment has very powerful YTP energy and i love it

    • @bombgiggity1460
      @bombgiggity1460 2 года назад +4

      I remember RUclips Poop.

    • @Santoryu90
      @Santoryu90 2 года назад +3

      @@bombgiggity1460 It’s still a thing

    • @bombgiggity1460
      @bombgiggity1460 2 года назад +4

      @@Santoryu90 You're still a thing.

  • @manbat1168
    @manbat1168 2 года назад +23

    Trust me moose, the amount of times i've seen people leave their engine running while they're not inside the car is too many, they need this tape.

    • @ericbeilmann3649
      @ericbeilmann3649 2 года назад +3

      IKR, every time I see it I can't help but wonder how long it is going to be before their car gets stolen.

  • @Andoryuuu
    @Andoryuuu 2 года назад +142

    The "Comply and give up your belongings" thing makes me laugh because when someone tried to rob me a few years ago while I was walking home from work, I said no, they pulled out a weapon (I live in Australia, so, not a gun, I'm not sure what though.), And I booked it back towards work, but the person trying to rob me was so confused when I said no that they didn't know how to respond, lol.

    • @rgs8970
      @rgs8970 2 года назад +47

      My friend was walking with a visitor from out of town when someone tried to rob them. The visitor gave them her purse, but my friend who has lived in cities for decades, negotiated with the mugger, telling him he could take everything except for the pouch with her id because she didn't want to go to the DMV to replace her license 😂 she acknowledged that it was a bold move but she didn't get shot -- and she didn't have to go to the DMV

    • @kaitlyn__L
      @kaitlyn__L 2 года назад +26

      “WHADJYA MEAN NO??” lol love it

    • @gracekim25
      @gracekim25 2 года назад +3

      Wow😅

    • @Potato-pc4tj
      @Potato-pc4tj 2 года назад +21

      They stopped because they legally can’t rob you if you say no

    • @mr.pavone9719
      @mr.pavone9719 2 года назад +16

      I (4'8", 85lbs) had a bully (truly about 6 feet tall) in middle school demand my lunch money. I looked him straight in the eye and said "No".
      He was so confused, he just stood there and watched me walk away.
      Later that day in study hall he told me he was gonna kick my ass, so I dared him to do it now in class. "C'mon you vig pussy, do it now. DO IT NOW."
      He shied away and never bothered me again.

  • @cheekyghost2284
    @cheekyghost2284 2 года назад +211

    Ian is transforming into a 1970's rockstar. 5 stars, would recommend

    • @MardiKivMusic
      @MardiKivMusic 2 года назад +21

      He looks like he would be crazy on the theremin

    • @letharja
      @letharja 2 года назад +9

      Hes stunning

    • @joehosier6187
      @joehosier6187 2 года назад +6

      That's been him on and off for years. I remember how weird he looked to me the first time I saw him cut his hair.

    • @JungleRice
      @JungleRice 2 года назад +5

      He has always been a rockstar.

    • @T1MAGEDDON
      @T1MAGEDDON 2 года назад +4

      you mean 5 rockstars

  • @darkninjafirefox
    @darkninjafirefox 2 года назад +162

    Fun story, a friend and her abusive ex used to get into fights about keeping their blinds closed. He had a lot of video games on display and she would argue that they should keep the blinds drawn so as not to potentially be robbed. Well cut to about a year after they break up and guess who got 4000$ worth of stuff stolen

    • @jims7773
      @jims7773 2 года назад +7

      $4000 dam did he have solid gold game discs?

    • @darkninjafirefox
      @darkninjafirefox 2 года назад +13

      @@jims7773 just rich parents

    • @mattpace1026
      @mattpace1026 2 года назад +21

      @@darkninjafirefox I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's the reason your friend's house was targeted, not because of a video game display.

    • @couchmaster3773
      @couchmaster3773 2 года назад +20

      @Matt Pace The video game display is an indication of wealth, I.E rich parents.

    • @mattpace1026
      @mattpace1026 2 года назад +4

      @@couchmaster3773 Dude, burglars are not just staring into people's windows looking to see whether or not there's anything to steal. The majority of criminals are smart enough not to do that, and the ones that aren't get caught pretty quickly.

  • @WillYumLIVE
    @WillYumLIVE 2 года назад +12

    I can't stop imagining a mugger on all fours picking up items like velma in a scooby doo episode

  • @5kytar34
    @5kytar34 2 года назад +147

    Does anyone else miss Televoid? I think this could’ve been amazing as a televoid episode.

    • @RetropixleDS
      @RetropixleDS 2 года назад +8

      It really could of been...wonder what caused it's demise?

    • @CreepyboomGamer
      @CreepyboomGamer 2 года назад +30

      Ian left the televoid, you think he would go back?

    • @uhsaywhatnow
      @uhsaywhatnow 2 года назад +35

      Look around at 2021 and tell me this all isn’t Televoid. Please.

    • @5kytar34
      @5kytar34 2 года назад +10

      @@uhsaywhatnow Seriously though. It really does feel like the televoid these days. I need to find myself some old movies now.

    • @AzizidarkReborn
      @AzizidarkReborn 2 года назад +28

      @@RetropixleDS So my understanding is two-fold. The first part is that if memory serves, Ian hit a bit of burnout after the lack of success with Televoid compared to the food videos (mainly due to the yt algorithm) and felt a need of a change of content and then didn't know what to do with televoid. Pretty sure he mentioned this on a Nancy Drew or Bully VOD. The second point is that televoid episode 6 (the party one) was in itself a fine conclusion: One where Ian finally escaped the televoid realm and joined us back in ours seamlessly.

  • @justhellbound4206
    @justhellbound4206 2 года назад +287

    broo I fall asleep to your Brutal moose originals playlist every night. Your content is so rewatchable. Best content creator. Keep it up my man.

    • @rudeboyspodcast
      @rudeboyspodcast 2 года назад +27

      I gotta wonder how it feels to have your content be frequently "slept to." I guess it's a compliment that people find it cozy? But it can also be taken like "this puts me to sleep, " lol

    • @jonnykanesantos
      @jonnykanesantos 2 года назад +28

      Replay value is hard to find on RUclips but I def rewatch Ian anytime. My gf and I always watch his streams before bed

    • @nuggetsdad444
      @nuggetsdad444 2 года назад +13

      SAME. Nostalgic Favorites is my go to playlist for bed. Moose has become a clutch part of my bedtime routine.

    • @flickeringdreams15
      @flickeringdreams15 2 года назад +14

      Sometimes when I wanna chill or sleep, I go straight to the cosmic crisp video. Best vibes and chillest aesthetic on this whole site.

    • @lizithekiwi
      @lizithekiwi 2 года назад +13

      I defo get a cozy feeling from Ian's videos, often have them oh when I'm going to sleep, like a bedtime story! 😊

  • @DarthFennec
    @DarthFennec 2 года назад +23

    Purse-snatcher: "Oh no the keys and some change fell out of the bag, whelp, I guess it's a lost cause, might as well drop the purse full of cash that I'm holding before running off"

  • @eddvcr598
    @eddvcr598 2 года назад +10

    14:06 I deadass blankly expected the narrator to say “Once you recognize this bad man in blue” because he’s so ubiquitous 😂

  • @Bonzapper
    @Bonzapper 2 года назад +167

    Hell yeah I was missing the Moose

    • @xenos_n.
      @xenos_n. 2 года назад +1

      You don't miss with the mooth

    • @RetroAmateur1989
      @RetroAmateur1989 2 года назад +1

      You must be a very lousy hunter then.

  • @Cavegeckosol
    @Cavegeckosol 2 года назад +283

    These were the "duck and cover" of the 80s-90s. Most thefts, assaults, and murders are likely to be committed by family members or people you know. But knowing what to do when a stranger in a polo shirt attacks makes us feel safer.

    • @Arbiter099
      @Arbiter099 2 года назад +29

      Most thermonuclear exchanges are likely to occur between your friends or family or people you already know too

    • @RobCamp-rmc_0
      @RobCamp-rmc_0 2 года назад +11

      @@Arbiter099 just the other day my douchebag cousin left a dirty bomb in a thermos at my front door, so I immediately lobbed a water balloon filled with VX at his trick ass
      yes, technically, it wasn’t a thermonuclear exchange, and I retaliated with narrow-scale chemical warfare, but I’m not interested in collateral damage, okay?

    • @Shinigami13133
      @Shinigami13133 2 года назад +2

      @@RobCamp-rmc_0 you've just got your priorities straight! It's about sending a message!

    • @eelguttz885
      @eelguttz885 Год назад +8

      This also, added with the fear of violent crime going up while violent crime statistics in general dip with police failing to do their job causing white and other privileged people who own homes in the suburbs more paranoid. They can start the whole "there goes the neighborhood" thing again because apparently in America, a real country, you can't have anything without a little racism.

  • @PunakiviAddikti
    @PunakiviAddikti 2 года назад +3

    Some insane people will actually follow you to your house. I remember a story where the writer encountered a Karen in a local store and the Karen actually followed her to be able to continue harassing her at her own home.

  • @LegallyBlindGamer7926
    @LegallyBlindGamer7926 2 года назад +6

    I am reminded of an old Discovery Channel show called It Takes A Thief, where these two former burglars did mock break-ins at people's homes, then gave the "victims" a total home security makeover. This always included an alrm system, and at least one safe, usually by a company called Gardall.

  • @flamingghottea
    @flamingghottea 2 года назад +257

    im getting ready to move out and start my own life on my own, so thank you for teaching me safety/self defense Brutalmoose

    • @trshxgod8040
      @trshxgod8040 2 года назад +8

      Good luck!

    • @i_teleported_bread7404
      @i_teleported_bread7404 2 года назад +9

      Good luck, dude.

    • @rampageblizzard
      @rampageblizzard 2 года назад +4

      living on your own can be fun. Just be aware of your surroundings and you’ll most likely be fine.

    • @lauraanjema7415
      @lauraanjema7415 2 года назад +10

      Make sure to call and let the police know that you're moving.

    • @jamesseeker2575
      @jamesseeker2575 2 года назад +7

      @@lauraanjema7415 That is true. The police are always glad to be called on their emergency line for non-emergencies

  • @mfenn7325
    @mfenn7325 2 года назад +20

    True story: most of the reported car thefts in my city are people not locking their cars ... So some people need this advice, apparently

    • @SHADOSTRYKR
      @SHADOSTRYKR 2 года назад

      Same in my area, the news had to tell people to lock their cars

    • @Thes4LT
      @Thes4LT 2 года назад

      Most people are more insane than paranoids. They are embarrassed to lock their homes and cars for some reason -- they think they're invincible and will never be robbed. It's predictable when, at some point, their unlocked car gets stolen or ransacked. Hate to tell them I told them so, but taking a few basic steps to secure your property and safety is better than being robbed. I still can't figure out why people are embarrassed to lock their doors, but they need to do it.

  • @Ghost_Of_SAS
    @Ghost_Of_SAS 2 года назад +4

    7:54 If I hear frantic whistling like that, I just assume the local junior soccer game has turned sour.

  • @thundertheangrycat9128
    @thundertheangrycat9128 2 года назад +6

    I love that no matter how boring the original content may have been on its own, your humor and editing always make it hilarious

  • @ShokieShoka
    @ShokieShoka 2 года назад +30

    Not gonna lie, I saw the thumbnail and thought it said “Don’t be a virgin, be alert!”

    • @VibrationCrystals
      @VibrationCrystals 2 года назад +1

      Ha!

    • @ah.neat.408
      @ah.neat.408 2 года назад +2

      Being a virgin raises the risk of you facing crime by 69%.

    • @jaynenunya6070
      @jaynenunya6070 2 года назад

      @@ah.neat.408 nice

    • @VibrationCrystals
      @VibrationCrystals 2 года назад

      @@ah.neat.408 I hate that this comment made me giggle.😅😆

    • @ah.neat.408
      @ah.neat.408 2 года назад +1

      @@VibrationCrystals I always like it when people respond to one of my comments about how I made them laugh.

  • @TheDonTime
    @TheDonTime 2 года назад +58

    Love when Ian reviews the old instructional videos. My wife and I quote the party etiquette video all the time. Awesome job!

  • @lilr8108
    @lilr8108 2 года назад +22

    “blueberry. a cereal that tastes of blueberry” - milk jug ian
    truly mystical times we live in

  • @RobCamp-rmc_0
    @RobCamp-rmc_0 2 года назад +3

    That guy wasn’t just randomly running up with a gun to someone just holding out a wallet, it was a scheduled theft. He called first and told the victim to be waiting at their door with their wallet ready, and he’ll be there at 5:30 to steal it. So now you can see that it was very convenient and helpful.

  • @jacksonpercy8044
    @jacksonpercy8044 2 года назад +39

    I'm not 100% happy with how Ian wrote "%100 Happiness Guaranteed"

  • @mandridhugh9555
    @mandridhugh9555 2 года назад +79

    dude, that magic spoon stuff is like $10 per box, and the discount code only removes most of the shipping cost so that's still $40 for 1 order.

    • @SvengelskaBlondie
      @SvengelskaBlondie 2 года назад +34

      I think id rather stick to the cheapo store-brand stuff, it costs like 1.5$ per box and I can walk home with it without waiting 59 trillion years for the postal service to lose it.

    • @thomasdanforth766
      @thomasdanforth766 2 года назад +27

      some of the cereal isn't all that great apparently, every review(not from their website which doesn't seem to have the option to leave one)I've seen rates all but the fruity ones low

    • @joshitheyoshi969
      @joshitheyoshi969 2 года назад +23

      Peanut butter and blueberry are by far their best flavors. But $10 a box ain't cheap, and you have to buy a minimum of 4. I recommend it if you're keto and wanting a treat but far to expensive to eat regularly.

    • @TheBaldr
      @TheBaldr 2 года назад +16

      Say No to $5 bowls of cereal.

    • @kaitlyn__L
      @kaitlyn__L 2 года назад +15

      How else will they pay for all the sponsor spots?

  • @CryoBear72
    @CryoBear72 2 года назад +11

    A lot of these are actually pretty good tips though lol.and you can absolutely notify the local authorities if you will be away from home for an extended period of time. They're even willing to do check ups on the property during your time away to make sure it hasn't been broken into

  • @patrickramseyart
    @patrickramseyart 2 года назад +7

    As a wise(?), cowboy hat-wearing man once said... *"STREET SMARTS!"*
    I'm hyped.

  • @Everdistance
    @Everdistance 2 года назад +26

    this feels like a video designed to give your grandma paranoid delusions

  • @SirChubbyBunny
    @SirChubbyBunny 2 года назад +42

    I'm wondering if Ian would have fun with the instructional tape about fire safety from the 80s that was made by, I think, the Seattle or New York fire department and McDonald's.

  • @SmashHistory
    @SmashHistory 2 года назад +18

    None of this matters anyway since Y2K will destroy us all.

  • @ChrisLincoln
    @ChrisLincoln 2 года назад +3

    The weird seat belt is the old automatic kind. The part she buckled in is usually always attached to the buckle and it moves forward along the door frame when you open the door. There's also a lap belt. I can't remember the last time I saw one of those!

  • @alectricavenue9278
    @alectricavenue9278 2 года назад +6

    My health class in highschool was shown this video in 2010.

  • @TheActualSeth
    @TheActualSeth 2 года назад +43

    You somehow always upload when I’m sick or going through a hard time, and I just wanted to say thank you. This channel always brightens up my day and helps me get through whatever is going on at the time

  • @absolutely1337
    @absolutely1337 2 года назад +25

    The tagline “someone wants to kill you with a gun” should be the American motto!

  • @masonshucart7055
    @masonshucart7055 2 года назад +3

    "Whether you actually feel that way or not. That's how you feel."

  • @Doci007
    @Doci007 2 года назад +4

    9:41 Always consult a licensed locks, doors and windows
    This one got me

  • @baileybrian9560
    @baileybrian9560 2 года назад +23

    Finally, time to stop being the victim and learn how to become the criminal 😎

  • @allegedlyfalse6779
    @allegedlyfalse6779 2 года назад +14

    Ian, your ad spots are always a delight. You're one of the few RUclipsrs whose ending ads feel like a special treat at the end of the episode instead of just "welp, here's the part where they talk about Ridge Wallet, time to scroll down to the comments section."

  • @BuckBlaziken
    @BuckBlaziken 2 года назад +2

    I live in a very small town. Because it’s so small and everyone knows each other, NOBODY ever locks their cars when they go into stores or service buildings. So from first hand experience, I can tell you with certainty that there are people out there who are complacent because they feel so safe in their community that they will not lock their cars.
    As someone who works with a lot of office works and stuff, I had to watch a video just like this, and it was updated for 2019, most of the information on this video is exactly the same.

  • @lucasgarcia8285
    @lucasgarcia8285 2 года назад +31

    I remember when Ian got a haircut and now his hair looks so amazingly long again 😍

    • @draa0gon
      @draa0gon 2 года назад +3

      Your profile picture has reminded me of the importance of dental hygiene.

  • @anongarcia
    @anongarcia 2 года назад +19

    ian needs to drop the hair care routine tbh those locks are looking particularly magnificent this video

  • @LQC2556
    @LQC2556 2 года назад +12

    "9-1-1, what's your emergency?"
    "Uh yeah, I'm headed out of town for a few weeks for... butt surgery. I'm getting a real... fat... butt implant. So... I just thought you guys should know..."
    [NARRATOR] _If you lose your temper, this may be exactly what the caller wants._
    This part was golden

  • @learn_with_gern
    @learn_with_gern 2 года назад +8

    "It's not a tape you would show to children"
    Unless you want to give them nightmares not from the crime on screen but from the musical sting between segments.

  • @mrrynishi
    @mrrynishi 2 года назад +12

    Consistently the best creator on this DAMN platform.
    Also, as a misophonic trainwreck, i appreciate the tasteful edits of eating sounds in the magic spoon ad. A lot of people go for the boosted crunch sounds, but not the moose. I love the moose.
    Thanks for great content, man. Sincerely.

  • @LARKXHIN
    @LARKXHIN 2 года назад +3

    I love the woman blowing the whistle after being robbed and looking around like “WHERE IS ANYONE???”

  • @kip258
    @kip258 2 года назад +3

    "Never go to the bank! You WILL get robbed at the bank!"
    I think you meant to say my Lawyer's Office.

  • @I_am_a_cat_
    @I_am_a_cat_ 2 года назад +4

    The purse guy literally shook her purse so everything would fall out lmao

  • @kellyl3728
    @kellyl3728 2 года назад +7

    I left the US 15 years ago and watching these videos makes me feel like I’m home again. I love these old videos you do so much!

  • @zenosama8505
    @zenosama8505 2 года назад +5

    “The only constant in life is that someone wants to kill you with a gun” -brutalmoose 2021

  • @amber7591
    @amber7591 2 года назад +7

    The shrub thing is interesting. I remember watching something some time ago and they talked about how it was good to have shrubs or rose bushes under low windows to deter people from trying to climb in.

  • @Tukaro
    @Tukaro 2 года назад +10

    brutalmoose is the only channel where I stick around for the sponsored segments, he and his Wizard Editing make these amusing regardless of what is being sold.

  • @tylociraptor8131
    @tylociraptor8131 2 года назад +30

    YESSS so excited for a new video. I love weird, obscure, rando VHS tapes and your coverage of them is the BEST

  • @samicat93
    @samicat93 2 года назад +3

    god the 90s were buckwild. simultaneously “stranger danger at every turn” and “hey you have to actually tell children hitchhiking is a bad idea”

  • @Dradeeus
    @Dradeeus 2 года назад +5

    10:42 This part made me laugh my ass off.

  • @kdgmr97
    @kdgmr97 2 года назад +7

    I lost my shit when it got to doors doors lock window doors. I don't know why, but that whole skit was hilarious

  • @redshiftthefox
    @redshiftthefox 2 года назад +15

    I'm always interested in these old things. Especially those old drive-in style ads you run before your streams. Good to see old things from past eras come to the present from time to time.

  • @kie2
    @kie2 2 года назад +16

    Ian's hair was covering the Y in yummy milk so I kinda lost it when he said he was going to pour some of himself onto his cereal

  • @thecrazycapn
    @thecrazycapn 2 года назад +8

    Ian, I imagine you have a whole guest room just full of weird costumes.

  • @jonathanbol3969
    @jonathanbol3969 2 года назад +5

    Every video reminds me of how impactful Ian's humor and editing are.

  • @Owlowlowljohnnies
    @Owlowlowljohnnies 2 года назад +21

    You’re the man Ian. I can always count on you making my day brighter

  • @flipletape9706
    @flipletape9706 2 года назад +4

    Could you imagine being stalked and instead of going in your car 3 feet away from you, you just keep walking to a crowded area 100 meters away from a dark alley? That's such bad advice lol

    • @Nocturne22
      @Nocturne22 2 года назад +2

      It depends. If you know you can't get the door unlocked fast enough and you're alone, it actually is better to RUN AWAY and into a crowded area to get help. When you come back, they'll definitely be gone because they don't want to risk you coming back with someone.

  • @sushicat999
    @sushicat999 2 года назад +5

    I wouldn't be surprised if that tape is lost media and Ian has the only know copy. He just seems to find the most curious things

  • @nothanks9040
    @nothanks9040 2 года назад +10

    yesss the safety psa content!! this stuff is endlessly fascinating, especially how things change over time

  • @Abfallkannibale
    @Abfallkannibale 2 года назад +25

    Hell YES! Exactly what I need today! Thx Ian, impecible timing as always!

  • @krokodil7057
    @krokodil7057 2 года назад +11

    Was just thinking about this channel! Thanks for a new vid

  • @ashleytyraisaacs
    @ashleytyraisaacs 2 года назад +76

    …ngl, 😭 women kinda do get actively stalked on a regular basis. Just working in retail could easily get you a stalker maybe every other month.
    But still, if you drop the stuff on the ground and when they bend down to pick it up, take advantage of their guard being down, and attack. Bonus points if your purse if full of crumbled cookies and and pennies.

    • @kaitlyn__L
      @kaitlyn__L 2 года назад +18

      Yeah, and if they recognise your car from one day to the next, they might do something to it while it’s parked.

    • @mybrunetteheart
      @mybrunetteheart 2 года назад +17

      being in retail can make you a sitting duck :(

    • @sadcrab9125
      @sadcrab9125 2 года назад +14

      This. My coworker drove home after closing the other night and was followed home. She lives alone. They weren't able to get in before the police arrived, but they yelled a lot of shit at her, and now she's always afraid of closing shifts.

  • @Critterkid9
    @Critterkid9 2 года назад +44

    Don’t forget that while some things may not apply to you as a man, they are actually very common knowledge and practice for women.
    Think the rape whistle, being aware of people following you to your car, or being approached from behind while distracted. Lots of women are taught to yell “fire” if they are being attacked because calling for help or rape gets less response. I agree that the scenes are super corny, but if you are being stalked, it’s probably good information and those people are likely the target demographic.
    That being said, your hair is looking spectacular, so you might need to watch out for creeps yourself 😂

    • @benjaminmenken5693
      @benjaminmenken5693 2 года назад +4

      These things can happen to anybody, you know that.

  • @maccamachine
    @maccamachine 2 года назад +5

    i’m glad you document these old vhs tapes it’s really a time capsule the feeling of these tapes are so chill and cozy

  • @Bman54X
    @Bman54X 2 года назад +5

    Remember, if you commute to work in a different city, you gotta tell the police every morning

  • @buranflakes
    @buranflakes 2 года назад +13

    I like how each section's title card has like, the music for when a supernatural murder occurs in Umineko

  • @kylejf2108
    @kylejf2108 2 года назад +1

    Omg this is great! I needed this. Thank you

  • @Akoyabones
    @Akoyabones 2 года назад +9

    These training videos are always a trip

  • @AIOctober
    @AIOctober 2 года назад +10

    That was the best segue to a sponsored section ever, well done, ya did it.

  • @caeridlock3930
    @caeridlock3930 2 года назад +1

    I cried for almost this whole video. But like.....for the right reasons. Because Ian's editing and commentary are pure gold every time ever.

  • @broke1078
    @broke1078 2 года назад +1

    Loved this video! Seems like a throwback to older game review style commentary brutalmoose stuff. Would love to see some more of this mixed in with your longer, more intricate videos