Unexpected Coming Out Stories (FTM Transgender)

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  • Опубликовано: 3 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 281

  • @ichlesemit
    @ichlesemit 4 года назад +352

    once i had to make an ultra sound on my lower abdomen. and after a while i recognized that he was uncomfortable. i said „oh...dont wonder, i dont have a prostate, because i’m a transman!“ he obviously was relieved. 😄

    • @WestCoastElements
      @WestCoastElements  4 года назад +71

      Oh my goodness. That's hilarious

    • @ichlesemit
      @ichlesemit 4 года назад +3

      Katie Baranauskas 😂

    • @imaginefishes
      @imaginefishes 4 года назад +2

      Wait what does ultrasound do to your prostate

    • @ichlesemit
      @ichlesemit 4 года назад +17

      Zander Koh if there is none, you can’t see/find one.

    • @mordechai_rotwein
      @mordechai_rotwein 4 года назад

      what about the skene's gland?

  • @Leah-o4y
    @Leah-o4y 4 года назад +404

    I forgot you were trans and the thumbnail confused me for like a minute

    • @jessebanda9775
      @jessebanda9775 4 года назад

      Lol

    • @Fleetato
      @Fleetato 4 года назад +7

      honestly me too for a quick second I was like wait what

    • @lampm4n
      @lampm4n 4 года назад +12

      this video was recommended to me and i didn’t realise he was trans so when he started the first story in first person inwas like huh???? what???? until i looked in the comments... he passes so fucking well it’s insane

    • @Hayden_Cat
      @Hayden_Cat 4 года назад +1

      Lil RE trans guys tend to generally pass better to

  • @TheLongjohntim
    @TheLongjohntim 4 года назад +85

    You are a very attractive guy. You look so comfortable in your skin.I'm really happy.

  • @lrochacastro2308
    @lrochacastro2308 4 года назад +177

    i want to be so cispassing at a point in my life that i'll have to come out as trans in a reverse way. Like i want someday to look so cis that i'll have to say "yea back when I was a girl" and I want to see the shock on the person's eyes.

    • @lampm4n
      @lampm4n 4 года назад +21

      Herrick Inman why do you care though

    • @mushroomkaiyoti111
      @mushroomkaiyoti111 4 года назад +18

      Herrick Inman I really hope that you heal your hatred towards trans people. It’s sooo obvious that you have no empathy towards trans people and that’s really unfortunate...

    • @ashsasmr8185
      @ashsasmr8185 4 года назад +11

      @@herrickinman9303 stop staring at naked people then

    • @Gee-xb7rt
      @Gee-xb7rt 4 года назад +1

      dude if you look like your pic you don't have to worry about passing.

    • @melodyrichardson5051
      @melodyrichardson5051 4 года назад +1

      Mushroom Kaiyoti He’s projecting. He’s clearly very insecure and self-loathing. I hope he finds peace as well.

  • @markus4715
    @markus4715 4 года назад +188

    I've been out for nearly a year and my mom keeps introducing me as "this is my *daughter, but she* prefers to go by Markus" and I know she means well but it really pisses me off because like I dont need the macdonalds worker to know I'm trans

    • @EinhornAnspitzer
      @EinhornAnspitzer 4 года назад +6

      That sucks :/

    • @Kojirakage
      @Kojirakage 4 года назад +20

      What a fucking bitch. She doesn’t mean well she’s tryin to embarrass you

    • @hopegold883
      @hopegold883 4 года назад +1

      Having trouble seeing how she means well.
      Take care! ❤️

    • @markus4715
      @markus4715 4 года назад +10

      @@hopegold883 well this is still very new to her, and I know that she is trying as well as she can to get more used to it. She definitely has been improving though, and has even been using this quarantine to help remember to call me my new name. It does annoy me that she does it, but I know that at this point in time, it's just her trying her best :). And thanks, you too ♡

    • @markus4715
      @markus4715 4 года назад +9

      @@Kojirakage that is untrue. I know my mother well, and this is just her way of processing this whole thing. She is doing it much much less than she used to, which is a good sign. She has also been using this quarantine to her advantage and has been practicing my new name and pronouns. It may seem like she is trying to embarrass me, but in reality she is just trying her best :)

  • @ken.dietitian
    @ken.dietitian 4 года назад +158

    I buy my needles & syringes for my shots at a local medical supplies shop. I've gotten to know the store owner really well over the year and I just assumed she knew I was trans. When she asked how my summer was I told her my top surgery went great. Then she was like "Wait. Are you... trans?" lol.

    • @Fleetato
      @Fleetato 4 года назад +16

      JustKenda hahaha what did she think you needed the needles for?? I think this just goes to show people who work in stores really don’t pay attention to what people are buying

    • @ken.dietitian
      @ken.dietitian 4 года назад +19

      @@Fleetato not sure... she would even help me find the right size and length needles every time. She remembered my order and everything! Probably just thought I had a medical condition I guess.

    • @em-up2om
      @em-up2om 4 года назад +21

      fleetato there are plenty of other medical conditions that require at home medications given through a needle lol

    • @Fleetato
      @Fleetato 4 года назад

      fair enough

    • @witchby9362
      @witchby9362 4 года назад +1

      Lmao, have people looked at you oddly thinking you're an addict or anything ? Just wondering, because I just started testosterone, and haven't started doing it at home yet, and I'm kinda worried.

  • @mremogay13
    @mremogay13 4 года назад +14

    I was at the pub with a mate chatting about dating, and just said that it's slightly harder for me because of the whole trans situation. Turns out she had no idea I was trans up until that point. i just kinda assume my friends know.

  • @EverAfterHL
    @EverAfterHL 4 года назад +122

    It has happened to me a couple of times at the dentist while I was still changing my name and such, at the bank, etc. Most times went ok like you, but I had two pretty bad experience. Once I fell while I was skateboarding, hit my head really hard,I was bleeding and had to go to the ER. While I was in really big pain and feeling really out of it the doctor asked me if I was taking any medication. I was too out of it to be scared in that moment and just said yes testosterone. He of course asked why, I simply said I was trans and that was that. My friend who was with me however told me later (I didnt see it since I was bleeding and all) he had made a face basically looking disgusted. I didnt see the doctor again, it was the night doctor who treated me, and the nurse who took care of me kept looking at me weirdly all night and I just didnt understand why at the time It didnt even cross my mind it would be because I'm trans. I assumed they would focus more on my health and how much pain I was in. The time after that was even worse. It was at the ER too for a serious UTI post surgery. Basically they treated me like a freak while I was in immense pain, I was traumatized for days and now I dont tell anyone unless I absolutely have too. I'm glad you had good experience thought. I generally did too, but those two made me suspicious of everyone so now I dont trust people.

    • @justintimemagddelow672
      @justintimemagddelow672 4 года назад +1

      You can't be trusted neither.

    • @user-yd1wl8lf7k
      @user-yd1wl8lf7k 4 года назад +18

      Some people are rotten and should know better. But don’t let them taint your view of the world. x

    • @WestCoastElements
      @WestCoastElements  4 года назад +33

      I'm sorry to hear that happened. It is hard to trust after several experiences like that. Our doctors are becoming more informed as time goes on, so I hope they will have learned. Who knows, you may have even been an eye-opener for some of them to understand that we are just normal people.

    • @sunleaves9849
      @sunleaves9849 4 года назад +24

      You can actually put in a complaint with their board or the hospital for that treatment.

    • @woelad1422
      @woelad1422 4 года назад +8

      Those are horrible experiences. How do people become doctors and nurses and somehow let their own personal biases affect the way they treat their patients. It's idiotic, hypocritical and ironic.

  • @ynnckx5508
    @ynnckx5508 4 года назад +204

    She was probably scared cause the thought you take testosteron to build muscles and shit, like the really unhealthy way

    • @WestCoastElements
      @WestCoastElements  4 года назад +46

      That was my first thought as well.. oh well lol. She was a funny lady

    • @doubleboy2388
      @doubleboy2388 4 года назад +2

      I wonder why it's healthy one way and not the other? It's the same thing...just using it for different purposes. One could argue that it's just as unhealthy either way.

    • @WestCoastElements
      @WestCoastElements  4 года назад +69

      ​@@doubleboy2388 It's different because in my case I am only taking the amount needed to regulate a normal level of testosterone, as many cis folks do as well. Some people just can't produce enough hormones naturally. The issue is when people take it unprescribed. That is unhealthy, and that is unsafe, as well as any type of self-medicating. Very different.

    • @gayfield420
      @gayfield420 4 года назад +4

      @@WestCoastElements yeah! this!!!!! i dont like the argument saying its 'unhealthy' for trans people.. it really isnt, the only problem is cis people taking far too much of it.

    • @ジョジョさま
      @ジョジョさま 4 года назад

      So taking testosterone to build muscle is unhealthy...but a biological female taking testosterone isn't?

  • @BucketListTravellers
    @BucketListTravellers 3 года назад +1

    Thanks for sharing your experiences.
    Being in a medical setting is stressful enough without the added anxiety of worrying about whether your provider will treat you differently because of who you are. Glad you have had good, professional providers.

  • @TaziH3ro
    @TaziH3ro 4 года назад +44

    I was on placement a few weeks ago with some paramedics. They had asked me what my plan was, and I said once I've been a paramedic for a few years, i'd love to join the army reserves, but can't due to medical requirements of the military. They asked me what type of requirements are needed, and I did kind of just move around the topic, but it was really hard to explain that I couldn't join the defence force until I had fully transitioned (eg, all surgeries and hormones). So I chose to tell them. It was a very safe environment, I had that same hands sweating feeling, and I remember my hands starting to shake as I told these people. They were super supportive and were just curious and annoyed about how Australian Defence handles this.
    Another time was quite recently as well. A couple of Monday's ago, I was bouldering with some mates, I pushed hard and tried to make a harder hold, but missed and ended up falling 2m to foam mats, but all my weight landed on my ankle (didn't have time to fall right). My friends called an ambulance, and I ended up in the ER. The paramedics that helped me asked me my past history and if I had anything that could have impacted the fracture. I knew I had to tell them about my Triple X chromosome as it can effect bone density. But to do that I would have to out myself. I felt safe enough to do it, and the paramedics again were super supportive and it even ended up being a very educational conversation cos I informed them how they can make future transgender patients feel safer, like asking their pronouns and preferred name (as long as it's safe). If they won't let you do an assessment, work with them to make them feel more comfortable.
    Generally victorian (australia) paramedics are pretty good from what i have seen and heard from others. It's always unnerving trying to do this, but it is very important in the discussion.

    • @WestCoastElements
      @WestCoastElements  4 года назад +5

      Thanks for sharing Taz, that's a helpful story :)

    • @TaziH3ro
      @TaziH3ro 4 года назад +2

      West Coast Elements your welcome mate. Thank you for sharing also!

  • @ChaseMountains
    @ChaseMountains 4 года назад +4

    Thanks for sharing your story, I think these conversations go a long way to opening up people's field of understanding and perspective on gender, which certainly needs an overhaul in almost every country on earth. All the best

  • @kaidynsisk4758
    @kaidynsisk4758 4 года назад +43

    I recently had to come out while at the dentist and I wish they were as respectful to me as they were to you during your experience. Once the assistant learned about my transition, I guess she assumed she could ask anything she wanted about both trans men and women. She kept referring to trans women as 'the guys' so I took that as an opportunity to try and educate her on appropriate questions and pronouns. After everything was done, I also approached the front desk and left a short letter requesting that the staff undergo LGBT+ sensitivity training so this doesn't happen to anybody else. It was really surprising that this happened because the dental office is actually across the room from the gender clinic portion of my doctor's office. They're all in one building. Anyway, that's the small novel about my weird experience at the dentist 😂 thank you so much for coming back to RUclips and sharing your experiences!

  • @neonjaystones1992
    @neonjaystones1992 4 года назад +24

    Most of the time I end up being reverse misgendered because I’m pre t but I am cis-passing 9 times out of 10 before I speak. Then once I speak they’re like “I’m so sorry ma’am” and I have to explain that they were in fact right to call me sir

    • @michajastrzebski4383
      @michajastrzebski4383 4 года назад +3

      well, thats one plot twist inside a plot twist for them, I guess :)

    • @nate-yl6fx
      @nate-yl6fx Год назад

      That's actually happened a lot in my childhood and teens, cause I was pretty manly girl (not like tomboy, altho I only wore boy's or neutral clothes, but more like butch-y appearance). I think this quality of me is that actually makes my dysphoria a bit more bearable in my life w/o transitioning. (Still woulda prefer not having tits tho lol)

  • @agagydal1207
    @agagydal1207 4 года назад +7

    He would be the perfect guy to role Peter Parker, Spiderman!!!

  • @krishiqua
    @krishiqua 4 года назад +4

    What an awesome, intelligent, brave guy! Hope you're doing well and processing in your transition and your life exactly the way you want to! Much love!

  • @EverFallDown
    @EverFallDown 4 года назад +10

    It's so great that you've had these experiences where you felt safe and respected enough to share that with them. I've started the process of getting top surgery, but I've had so many awful experiences from medical professionals over being asexual that it's hard to seek treatment while instinctively not trusting doctors. It's already exhausting, but I'm just gritting my teeth and pushing through. At least I have a wonderful counselor that's helping me.

  • @tarynimmel4840
    @tarynimmel4840 4 года назад +6

    Hey thanks for sharing! It's such a relieving feeling when people react in a casual way. Once, I tried to buy beer with some friends a few months ago at a grocery store and the elderly cashier was so confused by my ID since it was my old one that still reads "F." She didn't believe it was my ID and the manager also thought it was fake. Granted it's an out-of-state ID and I look 12 in the photo so I can't really blame her. Lol. But at first when she asked "why does it say F? Are you female?" (yes, really) I just responded "No. It's an old ID" but didn't explain further hoping she'd get it. I was wrong. I've been so used to being in a liberal city bubble where I've been fortunate to not experience many issues that I was taken aback at first too. Super grateful to have a new ID with an "M" gender marker now though, it's eased a lot of that stress

  • @jw5386
    @jw5386 4 года назад +13

    I don't want to go into detail but I know from experience that not all medical professionals will react well. I've had nurses lecture me about what "God intended." I live in the US by the way.

  • @Jshdhfjfsrjjdjksj
    @Jshdhfjfsrjjdjksj 3 года назад +3

    funny story: my friend texted me RANDOMLY and asked if i was trans like how-
    well whatever tipped it, im glad she knew
    (im ftm)

  • @kingbee2537
    @kingbee2537 4 года назад +26

    I had a transphobic experience while donating blood in 2016 and I haven’t done it since. It makes me really sad bc I loved doing it. I’ll probably do it again at some point but it always makes me nervous giving medical history to random professionals.

    • @joannaatkins822
      @joannaatkins822 4 года назад +9

      It's sad, but you have to be cautious. You shouldn't have to live in fear of bigotry.
      My husband is constantly struggling with being honest Vs staying safe, especially when it comes to medical professionals. There should never ever be any shame in telling someone you're trans, nor any fear.
      I hope that in the future you're safe and comfortable, and that your experiences are far more positive.

    • @Aster_Risk
      @Aster_Risk 4 года назад +1

      Donating blood saves peoples' lives. It's depressing that you were treated so badly that it discouraged you from being able to help others. I'm sorry. :( I hope you're able to go back to doing it at some point.

  • @parkeruri5194
    @parkeruri5194 4 года назад +2

    man I used to watch your trans content and you were one of my first exposures to the ftm life online. Thank you sm for putting yourself out there back then and now

  • @thomaswhite2579
    @thomaswhite2579 4 года назад +27

    When I had my hysterectomy, one of the nurses who was going to be present for the duration of the surgery was a woman I had worked with at a previous company (I am stealth). How awkward...

    • @PHlophe
      @PHlophe 3 года назад

      she recognized you ?

    • @thomaswhite2579
      @thomaswhite2579 3 года назад +1

      @@PHlophe Yep, because I was presenting as male at that job. She had no idea I was trans until I was having surgery.

  • @bdawg1118
    @bdawg1118 4 года назад +2

    I saw the thumbnail and thought you were reciting other people’s stories. Still when you first started explaining the story.. you pass so damn well I’m so jealous

  • @RCSVirginia
    @RCSVirginia 3 года назад +2

    One of the things that I like about placing videos like this on my "Coming Out As Gay" RUclips Playlist is that it exposes people to situations of which they never may have even thought. I bet that there are people who have never known someone who is transgendered. I don't mean that they don't know that someone whom they know is transgendered: I mean that don't know anyone who is transgendered. This introduces them to some aspects of this world. In addition, it shows other transgendered people that they are not alone in being in these circumstances.

  • @myotiswii
    @myotiswii 4 года назад +2

    He is always so positive! His videos really helped me to deal with being trans in a healthy and positive manner (especially mentally)

  • @ryancadena1188
    @ryancadena1188 4 года назад +3

    This is a really important conversation to have as a community. Like other minority groups, our status as such can have an impact on the treatment we receive from medical professionals. It's sad, but it happens more than people realize.

  • @elliemay1748
    @elliemay1748 4 года назад +9

    I haven’t had my legal name changed yet, so any time I go to a doctors office I have to explain why the name on my insurance card is different. I now hand them a post it note with my insurance card saying “I’m transgender”, which avoids any awkward conversations or anyone overhearing that discussion.

  • @akikoobillo
    @akikoobillo 4 года назад +3

    You got my attention!!! Well done on your transition!! Keep spreading positivity and inspiring the rest of us out there! Much love’

  • @palomatran
    @palomatran 4 года назад +10

    I’ve watched your channel for so frickin long I miss the old vids

  • @Wrabbit26
    @Wrabbit26 4 года назад +25

    “I haven’t seen an optometrist in four or five years...” I see what you did there. 😜

  • @samrosewood2218
    @samrosewood2218 3 года назад +1

    Hi Benton! Something reminded me of your account just now, and I thought I'd see how you're doing! Your videos were my first source of information on being a trans guy when I was struggling with my own gender identity a lot 5+ years back, and while I'm still kinda figuring myself out, I have resources now and know I'm not alone in this. I hope you're doing alright, wishing you well!

  • @willh7440
    @willh7440 4 года назад +17

    I was once denied medical care because the doctor found out that I was trans and non-monogamous/poly, disagreed with my life choices and refused to prescribe antibiotics for the ear infection I had.

    • @Violette_jebi
      @Violette_jebi 4 года назад +6

      Wtf 😨. Isn't that like, illegal?

    • @willh7440
      @willh7440 4 года назад +16

      @@Violette_jebi Not if the doctor says that you don't have an ear infection and it's just "allergies". Yeah went somewhere else right after and that doctor said my ear looked pissed off lol and gave me the meds I needed. I did report her and am in the process of legal follow up.

    • @Violette_jebi
      @Violette_jebi 4 года назад +3

      @@willh7440 Hope she'll have to face the consequences of her actions! Take care of yourself!

    • @Bimtavdesign
      @Bimtavdesign 4 года назад

      Absurd!!!!!! Did you report the """"doctor""""???

    • @Aster_Risk
      @Aster_Risk 4 года назад +1

      That makes me furious. I'm so sorry.

  • @yeahno4545
    @yeahno4545 4 года назад +6

    When I started Uni, I joined a society and made a ton of new friends. One day, one of the guys in our friendship group passively made a very transphobic comment (something along the lines of, “I should not be obligated to call a girl a dude, or a dude a girl” etc.) and at this point, I’d not come out to them as FtM; since I’m on testosterone, they just assumed I was cisgender. Needless to say, I’ve sort of been very hesitant to ‘come out’ as trans, despite being so far along in my transition. Which SUCKS. I don’t want to lie to people if it ever comes up; I also don’t want to know someone for months and months, and THEN drop the bomb on them that I wasn’t born male. It’s just- AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH

    • @kjlm4574
      @kjlm4574 4 года назад +1

      Yeah No i have something similar :) a guy keeps making transphobic « jokes », but doesn’t know I’m trans. I’m not on testosterone yet, but I’m planning on casually coming out to him, once I will be, just to see his reaction. (With him I know that there will only be apologies and « oh I didn’t know » awkwardness, but no real aggression or anything. That’s just my plan, please be safe whatever you do🤗)

    • @dallymoo7816
      @dallymoo7816 4 года назад +1

      I get that can be tough but that is their decision to not do that or do it and if they do not accept you then others who are real friends will.

  • @bluewingsprite
    @bluewingsprite 4 года назад

    So happy to hear that healthcare professionals have been respectful. Have a lovely day

  • @chrisrelhard
    @chrisrelhard 4 года назад +5

    i'm always oversharing with doctors because i never trust my own judgment with what might be affecting their field of expertise, so these resonated hard with me. that being said, i kinda just stopped socially coming out and now only a select few people know i'm trans. like, i didn't mean to be stealth, but it just kinda happened. even my housemates don't actually know. it gets a little odd at times and i wonder if i should come out, but it just doesn't seem like "need to know" information. they know i'm gay from just casual conversation, so that has led to certain topics in discussion that are not relevant to me, but it's still pretty rare and i haven't felt like it actually needs to be stated.

    • @WestCoastElements
      @WestCoastElements  4 года назад

      I completely relate to feeling unsure about sharing because I don't know how it could impact a doctors decision. Reading through the comments, I'm learning that it might affect more than we think. But as you mentioned, these things are hard because it doesn't always feel like "need to know" information, especially in a social setting.

  • @moonshine9039
    @moonshine9039 4 года назад

    Thank you for bringing your youtube back. This might not mean much, you may not see it but you really helped me through a dark time in my life 6 years ago and that is part of the reason i am still alive today. Your videos were a calm escape for me then, and it’s great to see you back on here

  • @wordsforwounds
    @wordsforwounds 4 года назад +1

    Yo I used to follow you on one of your old channels and legit thought you’d left RUclips forever, glad to see you’re back and still making quality vlogs!

  • @daniellevel4466
    @daniellevel4466 4 года назад +5

    whenever i have to take out my i.d. it feels like i come out to rando strangers almost every week. i have to say something like “trust me its me(raise eyes or “its an old name” “ another life” and get a “huh?” or a one of those eye raising glares back at the register/or some other object that needs attention 😶. im standing there waiting to get a thumbs up or down. waiting to get the tf out because the other people in line are now glaring. this social distancing is keeping everyone minding their own business so its not as bad as of lately.

  • @ConnorYamsek
    @ConnorYamsek 4 года назад +4

    I had this happen with a new dentist before. They make you write your surgeries and medications down and so I did. About half way through the appointment she's reading what I put in there and just pauses. I pass very well since I've been on testosterone and she had been using he/him pronouns before that (those are the ones I use). After the pause she just asks.... "wait, what pronouns do you use?". She was respectful and that was polite of her to ask, just unexpected I guess and because she only asked when she got to that part, I know it's probably not a question she regularly asks patients.

  • @thefilipinojoe
    @thefilipinojoe 4 года назад +2

    Personally, I always ignore those medical history questions.. basically saying I am and have always been in perfect health. I don't give up my medical history unless it's pertinent to my health or they're going to see my scars in an examination. Basically, I keep my medical history on a need to know basis.

  • @Arthur5260
    @Arthur5260 3 года назад

    Such a young guy thinking about life insurance, very smart. Great video. Learning alot from your videos. Thank you.

  • @DestructoPop
    @DestructoPop 4 года назад +1

    I come out ALL THE TIME. Haha... Did example, I used to fit bras for a living, I had a very large chest so my manager just automatically put me in that department and had me trained. 🤷‍♂️
    So sometimes I'll accidentally comment on a band size or cup size with unusual acumen, especially for a very visibly gay guy, so I'll just come out rather than deal with the confusion and possible intimidation. Like a girl will say "yeah, I couldn't find this in a 34B, but I'm a little heavier now, so I just got a 36B." I'm like "oh! Well cup sizes are algorithmically determined based on band size compared with bust circumference, so your cup size may be a little different in that band size!" And she'll give me a weird look and I'll slyly add "I, uh... Used to have to wear these too, before I had surgery. I'm trans, FTM." And she'll look VISIBLY relieved and go "OHHHHH".
    Then again, I live in the SF Bay Area, where it's truly and honestly No Big Deal to be trans, so the weirdest reactions I get are usually "You're so brave 🥺" 😅

  • @Wrabbit26
    @Wrabbit26 4 года назад

    Thank you for continuing to share your story and experiences, Benton.

  • @neveronasunday533
    @neveronasunday533 8 месяцев назад

    Love your story and your story telling. Kudos to you for sharing it 🥰

  • @roaldvanelswijk4888
    @roaldvanelswijk4888 4 года назад +1

    Thanks for sharing these coming out stories with us. I'm happy to hear that people didn't treat you differently and that you felt safe. By the way, you're a seriously handsome dude. Just saying.

  • @nexttsar
    @nexttsar 4 года назад +2

    Most people are kind, but especially in Canada.

  • @user-yd1wl8lf7k
    @user-yd1wl8lf7k 4 года назад +28

    You’re a good looking guy. 😀

    • @marufubi
      @marufubi 4 года назад +15

      Herrick Inman you’re right. He isn’t a woman. He’s a man.

  • @woelad1422
    @woelad1422 4 года назад +4

    When I think about my life later during my transition and after, I don't think I'll be telling many people about my transition, even certain specialists that I don't think the information is relevant to. If it has something to do with surgery and a reaction I might have, then maybe but I don't know if I'll ever be that comfortable with strangers. The last time I went to the dentist (I'm 18 and they're my families dentist) I was like 5 months on T with a name change and all that and I tried to get them to take my new/preferred name but they didn't because it wasn't updated for my insurance at the time yet. I'm not going to bother going back because it makes me uncomfortable having them know I'm trans so I might just change dentists straight up.

  • @PAfarmboy
    @PAfarmboy 4 года назад +2

    Good to see you post again Benton. I was wondering what had happened to you.

  • @michajastrzebski4383
    @michajastrzebski4383 4 года назад +3

    re: "why are you taking testosterone", many MDs could get triggered with that hormone, because extreme body... "builders" (i'd not call them body builders outright, more like junkies) abuse it in various ways.

  • @GrimMortbane
    @GrimMortbane 4 года назад +1

    Hehehe, when I picked up my first script, the pharmacist was doing the consultation and he accidentally said insulin, then had to correct himself and felt awkward about it. I just smiled and said "Surprise!"

  • @Davey8
    @Davey8 4 года назад +1

    I think she was surprised because you look like such a healthy male she couldn't imagine why you'd want to take testosterone... Good for you... I'm glad you're living your truth. You have my profound admiration

  • @sapphicmystery2734
    @sapphicmystery2734 4 года назад +1

    My worst coming out story was an accidental outing of my friend. I wasn't full-time yet and a (future) friend jokingly asked if I wanted to go into the ladies rest room because I said I was uncomfortable going into the men's rest room and another friend asked me "Oh. Does he know?". I just wanted to die in that moment. I turned so incredibly red. And he slowly started to realize what that meant. But he was really accepting. It was still super embarassing.

  • @Magistrate_of_the_Elder
    @Magistrate_of_the_Elder 4 года назад

    It's always so inspiring to see fully transitioned people who people wouldn't know are trans outside of the person telling them.

  • @jessebanda9775
    @jessebanda9775 4 года назад +4

    Notificacions on thats why I came here first.

  • @gerardhernandez4367
    @gerardhernandez4367 4 года назад +1

    Very great information I as a gay man understand some of your concern. As a person who have family/ friends who are also trans I am going to share this with them. Thanks for your openness to share.

  • @paultaylor914
    @paultaylor914 Год назад

    I hope no one has to go through this, but getting arrested can be truly horrible. From being frisked to undressing in front of strangers (bend over and cough) or having to hand over a packer with all other belongings. Plus being put in solitaire confinement. I know it's for our "protection" but still sucks.

  • @reneebear3641
    @reneebear3641 4 года назад

    First time seeing this channel.
    Holy hell you pass completely, I’m jealous.

  • @jessebanda9775
    @jessebanda9775 4 года назад +4

    Yassss. New video

  • @Kz-rn9yh
    @Kz-rn9yh 3 года назад

    he’s so cute i’m crying

  • @kimmi9697
    @kimmi9697 2 года назад

    really great and so difficult to navigate sometimes how much to disclose, to who, and when

  • @cindylouchou4022
    @cindylouchou4022 4 года назад +2

    Omg, i had the same type of experience with an optometrist, im a trans women and when she asked me about what medication i took, i said im on hormones and her only reaction was: Oh, so young? as in i was already in menopause. She still doesnt know to this day ahah.

  • @jrrose6689
    @jrrose6689 4 года назад

    I live in Sweden and many doctors offices/dental places here are LGBTQ+ certified, at least the majority of the ones I have gone to. It feels really comforting knowing that the staff has undergone education and are trained in meeting LGBTQ+ people. Even the high-school I went to had a certification. I feel really lucky being born in a country where people are so excepting, of course, there are still problems, but many steps are taken in the right direction.

  • @cassiusredgunhehimhis1530
    @cassiusredgunhehimhis1530 4 года назад

    I would already be cognizant of my professionalism in the work environments you have shared, only because I find you very attractive.

  • @entityvoid
    @entityvoid 4 года назад

    I have no idea who you are but i am now a loyal subscriber

  • @joserosado7286
    @joserosado7286 2 года назад

    Hi, I admire your courage. I’m happy for you. Your very handsome! See you on the trail!

  • @DragoMorke
    @DragoMorke 4 года назад +1

    It is an interesting take on your outings.
    Sometimes when I 'out' myself in similar ways as you did, that is by not saying it directly but leave it (more or less clearly) implied I often wonder if the person really understood what I am saying, meaning that my gender assigned at birth was not the same as I present as today.
    Some people not versed in medical terms at all might for instance not know what a hysterektomy is, and might feel too awkward or cautios to ask any further. The trans person then may think they understand what that implies, but not all people understand it.
    It would therefore have helped if you described the situatuation and reactions more clearly and if any further conversation on the topic happened that made it clear that the person got what you meant.
    The second case with the optometrist was - in my opinnion - not an outing at all, the situation just came very close to the topic but you decided against it. I understand why you mentioned it here, though.
    How the woman actually thought of you taking testosterone can go in different directions as you implied in your retelling depening on her body language and how she sounded in detail.
    You said you thought she cared about you since she implied that it might not be a good idea to take testosterone. She may have thought: this is a bad idea, I don't like people taking something they don't really need, in this case to make themselves more manly or something in that direction. She may not have actually cared about you in particular, but the concept of you taking testosterone.
    But I might just thinking pesimistically here and she might have actually cared for you, if her body language seemed to show that.
    I myself often pefer to be more clear - whenever I feel the need, or just feel like it just like that - in outing myself and actually say in words "I am transgender".

  • @TheRainbowDragoness
    @TheRainbowDragoness 4 года назад

    In medical and health professions we're trained not to react if someone discloses to us. Sometimes it's difficult but you have to remain as professional as possible.We are also taught to ask about pronouns and preferred names.
    As for the Opto asking about your T, it can be really bad for your cardiovascular health if used incorrectly, which is why it should only ever be taken if prescribed and used as directed. The blood vessels in your eye are very sensitive and particularly prone to rupture, so she was right to be concerned medically.

  • @lindacarruthers3423
    @lindacarruthers3423 4 года назад

    What a good video .interesting . And holy smokes are you a nice chap . Heaven knows what sort of girl you were but that is waaay gone , not a trace .

  • @eddie054
    @eddie054 Год назад

    THAT'S IT! I"M TRIGGERED, NO MORE BUD LIGHT! (Actually good for you! Just had to put that stupid reaction.)

  • @invinciblesummer13
    @invinciblesummer13 4 года назад +13

    My dad is a cis male and he had to take testosterone for a while because he has Lyme disease! Maybe she thought you had Lyme haha

    • @zoedark7101
      @zoedark7101 4 года назад

      What's a cis male?

    • @bajanboinoho5378
      @bajanboinoho5378 4 года назад +3

      Zoe Dark it’s a biologically born and self identified man.

    • @zoedark7101
      @zoedark7101 4 года назад +1

      @@bajanboinoho5378 so basically a man then?

    • @invinciblesummer13
      @invinciblesummer13 4 года назад +7

      Zoe Dark it’s one type of man! Trans men are men as well.

    • @zoedark7101
      @zoedark7101 4 года назад +2

      @@invinciblesummer13 yes they're born in the wrong body. Why all these names? Aren't we just people?

  • @alisonsmithers4430
    @alisonsmithers4430 4 года назад

    I can relate to this completely, I once had to have an abdomen scan and she asked me why they had removed both my ovaries when I had my hysterectomy! I then had to explain I was trans, She was super cool and didn’t treat me any differently 😊

  • @davidluffman1833
    @davidluffman1833 4 года назад +1

    Guy who works in a laboratory: "Oh nooo, a patient. Pls dont talk with me!" Patient: "I have issues" Labguy: "Oh nooo, a conversation, I can't deal with this" Patient: "Pls understand me"

  • @Caitlin_Thompson
    @Caitlin_Thompson 4 года назад +2

    Lol I thought this was like a reddit readings thing. You definitely pass Never could have guessed

  • @anthonygrabowski6402
    @anthonygrabowski6402 4 года назад

    I have been thinking about coming out to my teachers and my classmates for a few weeks now. Now that we’re all doing online school (from COVID-19 social distancing) it seems like it’ll be much easier because I don’t have to face them irl. Just send one mass email, make a few comments, and answer any questions that may pop up. But that’s also over 100 people I’d be coming out to at the same time.
    I feel like I might regret not coming out because I’m graduating in a month. Maybe it’s safer not to because idk who’s safe, idk of this’ll effect my chances at getting a job after I graduate, idk if anyone will take to the internet and out me (even though I’m already out online??). And the job thing is huge. I feel like if I come out to my school, then I’ll have to come out wherever I work, which I’d like (bc I want people to use my name), but idk if I’m ready for that much yet. Especially because I’m 18 and no where near getting T anytime soon.
    But my biggest concern is that my family knows what’s up, but are not supportive, they don’t try to understand, and even though I’ve been told a few times that I won’t be kicked out, I’m scared that this might be taking it too far and I’ll get kicked out by my dad. But if that happens I have nowhere to go. I already said it, but I’m not working yet and I have no money. I have no support from my parents, only from a few of my sisters.
    Right now, cons are outweighing the pros, but what if its not actually that bad? What if I’m being dramatic? I really want to come out to my teachers at least. I want to write my name on my projects and assignments and I want to put it in my username and I know that my teachers will have to respect my name and pronouns. Not only that, but I trust all my teachers. They’re all lovely people, its just that my classmates will realize the fact that there’s an Anthony in there class all of a sudden and then realize it’s me, which isn’t bad! It’s just...it’s a HUGE change. One I’m scared of, but really really really want to happen. Desperately.
    Thanks for listening, if you’ve read this far. Sorry for the long comment 😅

    • @pacolavin
      @pacolavin 4 года назад

      As a gay man myself, I will never understand why many people want to come out to friends, classmates, relatives, etc. Does that make the difference in our world? I don't think so. You know, no one gets in anywhere saying "Hey morning, guess what, I am (straight, bi, gay, trans, etc.) Have a good one!" Really? At the end of the day who cares? It's like telling everyone out there that I love ketchup on my popcorn...lol ....who cares? I've never come out and will never do so. To me is like I shouldn't share everything I know. I call them secrets. Let people figure that out. You should focus on other stuff rather than talk about your privacy, it's my golden rule. Of course, I have gay friends whom I exchange views on being gay and stuff but my sexuality doesn't define me. But if you really want to do it, go for it. In my humble opinion, you should wait longer to come out. I mean, live your life, enjoy your family, friends, graduate, get a job, make some money, go to college and so on. You may delay your coming out, if you would say so, but I think you need to be ready to handle such a situation accordingly. Please don't get me wrong, but you know, this world is not that kind and there is a lot bigotry and evil out there. Think twice before risking what you already have such as your current relationships ( there will be relatives or friends who will walk out once they get the news and that'll break your heart) I've seen it and some haven't taken it that well. Wait a little bit longer, that won't hurt. At the end of the day, it is up to you to build or destroy your world. Best wishes.

  • @gdave53925_
    @gdave53925_ 4 года назад

    New to your channel. Thanks for your bravery. You are gorgeous! 🤗

  • @MariaEOD
    @MariaEOD 4 года назад +1

    You’re a very handsome man! Ever would’ve thought you were trans! 😳👍🏽

  • @mariem.5613
    @mariem.5613 4 года назад

    This is so random but I just noticed that I have the same lamp 😉 That black and gold ikea one that's standing in the back. It's right next to me. Okay, bye. Nice video by the way.

  • @MarvinNeumannOfficial
    @MarvinNeumannOfficial 4 года назад

    Thanks for sharing your story

  • @rpjey
    @rpjey 4 года назад +3

    Had to get a test done and I mentioned a couple surgeries - double incision (tho the more medical term for it) and a hysto. I had a female nurse who was questioning me/running the test and a female dr who was over seeing it... the dr looked at me and asked me about the hysto and I'm just thinking like - you're a doctor and you cant imagine why someone would need to get a hysto.. it was incredibly awkward as the nurse then selected the box marking me not pregnant

  • @geminhya
    @geminhya 4 года назад

    Love your background !

  • @zoedark7101
    @zoedark7101 4 года назад +9

    I would never had guessed in a million years.

  • @dddd-tm9ew
    @dddd-tm9ew 3 года назад

    I just saw your vid from 7 years ago how to pass as a male ,, and now...wow😢😢

  • @riley0018
    @riley0018 4 года назад

    when the optometrist asked me if i was on medication, i said no but i had been on T for about 5 months at the time.

  • @cloudstrife3799
    @cloudstrife3799 3 года назад

    As FTM, you look so handsome.

  • @rarh3643
    @rarh3643 4 года назад

    Can only speak for optometrists as that’s my field of work, but in case anyone thinks we’re being nosy for no reason, medical history and prescriptions can play an important role in how your eyesight is affected! Glad she showed concern though for you and took proper note of what you were saying, Im guessing perhaps she linked testosterone with cis men taking steroids?

  • @FINEDIAMOND
    @FINEDIAMOND 4 года назад

    You're such a good looking man! 🙂

  • @goji253
    @goji253 4 года назад

    This guy is so fucking handsome it makes me feel bad xD

  • @trannygalore6610
    @trannygalore6610 4 года назад

    I don’t know why you feel like you don’t want to share about being trans when here you are sharing a lot of intimate details about being one. 🤣

    • @WestCoastElements
      @WestCoastElements  4 года назад +1

      I definitely don't mind sharing my experiences as a Trans guy 😊 It's not always easy to talk about, but I've never regretted any discussions about it, intamte or not. It feels good to share when courage strikes.

  • @Earth098
    @Earth098 4 года назад +1

    I just came across this video. It was a total surprise to hear that you were trans, I could not have guessed at all. If you don't mind asking, did you go through the hormone treatment before the puberty?

  • @RobPetty622
    @RobPetty622 4 года назад +1

    That is a beautiful painting behind you. Is it of any significance?

  • @AvitalShtap
    @AvitalShtap 4 года назад

    0:53 wOw gReAt 🤣

  • @nexttsar
    @nexttsar 4 года назад

    I wondered what happened to you as I had been subscribed to you in a previous channel. You look all male now. What is your relationship with Lindsay? Are you attracted to women or men?

  • @TetraResinstone
    @TetraResinstone 4 года назад

    Super cute!

  • @muhammadmuhaiminhisham7387
    @muhammadmuhaiminhisham7387 3 года назад

    Here, may this wisdoms leads you to a better life for you and your loved ones:-
    "See the world not as it is, but as it should be."
    "Nobody should ever feel belittled for whoever they love".
    "Religion is about *PEACE* and *MERCY* of God."
    "When you get to God, He will never judge you based on your sexuality. He will judge and look at you, based on what type of a person you are."
    "God loves us beyond any and everything else, and that’s who we should love first."
    "You're entitled to love whoever you want to, the way that you want to, without the judgement of anyone else."
    "And in the sight of God, *KINDNESS* and *LOVE* are the highest priority."

  • @rdhenke
    @rdhenke 4 года назад +2

    Handsome 💞

  • @alexzandercastillo8053
    @alexzandercastillo8053 4 года назад

    Are you mostly stealth irl, Benton?

  • @mightyobserver12
    @mightyobserver12 4 года назад

    Oh I didnt want hysterectomy. Ive been bleeding.
    Why would u take it out?
    The doctors want me to do it because of myoma.

    • @ProfessorEGadd
      @ProfessorEGadd 4 года назад +1

      Everyone's body, needs and expectations are different. There is no right way to transition and nobody but you can decide when you are done. That said, I'm no medic. I would urge you to take advice from medical professionals seriously.

  • @leonie7754
    @leonie7754 4 года назад

    There are a lot of medical reasons why medical professionals should know you are trans. There are conditions that are way more common (or exclusive) to one gender over another and if the person checking you sees you're a man, they won't be looking for (or might overlook) issues more common in women. Similarly, when offering dosages of medication, some are absorbed better in one gender than another - women adversely react to some drugs compared to men. This is a biological fact, not an invalidation of your right to be recognised for your preferred gender, so sod their reaction, it's your health (and indeed your life) that's more important! They need to know the facts so they can help.