How we got our kids to stop FIGHTING!
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- Опубликовано: 24 авг 2024
- Here's a new method we started to help give our kids one-on-one attention, as well as stop the fighting and bickering! Do you do anything like this? Share with us below in the comments if so! Be sure to check out funcheaporfree.com for more info!
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As a 15 year old girl with two other teenage sisters. I️ just want to say that this is really important not only with little kids but with older kids too! About once a month each of us spend time with our mom and dad and it really helps. It makes it easier for us to talk to our parents about things most teens don’t want to talk about and honestly makes us listen to our parents better because we have a more friendly bond with them.
I tell mine that if they're going to argue they're gonna need to sing it because I don't want to hear it otherwise. Works like a charm.😋
I love this!
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Hahaha that's an amazing idea!!! 😍
We do this as well; we call it Kid of the Day. They get to make all the choices for that day, but it also has a flip side... the Kid of the Day also has to feed the dog. We have three kids so we keep it constantly rotating throughout the month, and we keep track of it on the kitchen calendar with numbers 1,2,3,1,2,3,etc. They love it. No more fighting over which chair, which movie, which restaurant after church. We love it!
I can see this system as being helpful in certain situations- like choosing what movie to watch or what song to play in the car- but unnecessary in others. Our dishes and cutlery all match so fighting over that type of thing never existed. Our kids had assigned seats at the table and in the car from day one so eliminated that fight as well. Also, because our kids are different ages, they have different bedtimes so each child got their mommy and daddy one on one time EVERY day. While the 3 year old was getting tucked in, for example, the six year old was playing on his own or with the other parent. Then later, he got his turn for one on one. As they get older and share the same bed times though, I can see how your system would be very useful. We let each child choose once a week what to have for dinner (from a parent-chosen list of appropriate foods of course or else we'd be eating popcorn for dinner some nights lol) That has been fun and seems to work.
Suzy P. Parks I know some parents give each kid a color say green plate cup and even towel and bed sheets and also assigned seats in the car and dinner Table but I like the idea of quality time with each one
When I first saw the title of this video I instantly thought "Clickbait! Getting kids to stop fighting is impossible!" But this actually sounds like an amazingly helpful idea! Thanks so much!! =D
Lisa P Nothing she ever posts is clickbait. Every video achieves the impossible 🙌🏽
We have 2 girls and every other day, they take turns being "Queen" for the day. Anytime there is a disagreement about something, we simply remind them who the queen is! We've been doing this for a couple of years and it is AMAZING!
Genius! I am doing this. My boys are 5 and 3.5 and fight ALL THE TIME.
What a fantastic idea! Quality time is such an important yet undervalued and easily missed love language with people in general because we all have lives and claim to be so busy. Children don't understand this adult-level of business. And even if you're not perfect with it, if they see you trying and being consistent with spending special time with them then how great those little memories will be for them to fall back on into adulthood!
I LOVE LOVE LOVE this idea! We have 3 kids (5,6, and 8) and they fight over EVERYTHING it seems, all. the. time. The plates, seats, songs, shows, who gets to walk the dog to the bus, who gets to collect eggs, who sits in the middle of the car, etc. It is so overwhelming for me to constantly have to referee- I can't wait to start this! THANK YOU!
So you had me tearing up when you talked about your middle child - I've got one too (mom of 4!) - this is such a good idea! I can't wait to start w my kids!
I so wish I'd seen this idea when my kids were young . I became a single parent to 4 under 6 yrs so I totally get the time for each child thing. Concistancy is so important with kids and I was always so bad at that. I found the things I started when they were young and got in the habit of were so much easier to keep up. I never call my kids a name, if they do something stupid I'd say what you did is stupid and it makes a huge impact on a child the way you speak to them and I have managed that their whole life because I made it a habit. If I'd thought of this when they were little it would have been so much easier. However I did manage to bring up 4 great kids who are now aged 16,18,20 and 22. It is important to trust yourself and also remember these are people and not just kids. And if you mess up apologise and move on. All parents make mistakes but it's what you do with those mistakes that count. This is a great idea and time management model to follow. Xx
Seeing you tear up like that about your kids, you are such a good mom. Anyone can tell. ❤️
I 👏🏻 LOVE 👏🏻 this idea. One criticism I see about large families is that each of this kids don’t get as much 1:1 attention so this is such a thoughtful idea and solution
Oh my goodness! I think you just saved my life! pregnant with number 5 and my oldest is 6.... plus attempting to work online. My hardest thing is remembering (or even wanting) to play... but it makes the world of difference when I do. (haha, We could be friends) I have listened to about 20 sibling fight problem vids in the last hour and yours was by far the most fun, practical, tangible and appealing of all the ideas I've heard. Can't wait to implement this into my crazy insanity of a life. Thank you SOOOOOOOOO much!
You’re amazing! I’m a primary school teacher in the UK teaching year 1 (age 5-6) and your approach is exactly the sort of things we teachers need to do to manage 30 at a time. They need to have a consistent, transparent system, clear rules and trust in the systems. I just need to work on applying the principles at home as well as school. I’m done in after a day teaching.
As a parent I felt so defeated today but, I am so glad I watched this video. I am willing to try this. We did something similar but, I like the days vs the everyday time. That sounds easier. Thanks for sharing what works for your family.
how did you prepare the kids when you were pregnant with their siblings?
Our girls are less than a year apart and when they were little we did something very similar to this. Since there were only two of them, we just alternated days. Eliminated so many of their arguments. Also we used Rock, paper, scissors as the great equalizer! Anytime there was a disagreement between the two of them we made them do rock paper scissors and whoever won got to choose. Worked like a charm! They still giggle about it to this day even though they are now in college, LOL
I love this idea! I am not a "player" either. When I try to get in the floor and play with them I start to nit pick and clean their room instead... I'm working on it!
I LOVE the idea of the special tuck in time! We only have two children so I think we will do this every Sunday-Friday with our kids and just switch kids every night. I am a SAHM but I feel like I'm always cleaning and running errands and cooking and the only real time I get is when we read together every night and an occasional special one on one mommy/daddy and me date night. I love that this gives them a little uninterrupted time every day. Thank you so much for sharing.💕 love all your hack videos by the way!
I have been binge watching your show for some time now. Really great helpful and entertaining videos. I have five kids as well. I am only 24 and my two step kids are 10 and 8 with my other kids 4,3 and 18 mo. We want a large family because they will have each other when we are no longer around. However I have been loosing my mind with all the fighting. Due to unfortunate circumstance we home-school and do not currently have a vehicle that I take them all in and get out of the house. Our current home is so small. All three of our boys share the living room. I have no family/ friends in the area and my husband works 10 hr days. We do not have a baby sitter for any date nights. So with all of these things I am getting fizzled out. I love this idea. So excited to try it! Thank you for opening your home and family to the world to help others.
I love this idea. I feel that I might adopt this when I am ready to be a parent. Thank you.
I'm going to try this, the fighting is unreal.....about the show on t.v, music in the car, cup at supper......even the fork. ugh
I hear you! Hang in there. You'll love this!
I have a hard time spending time with my 2 kids. I get bored quickly and it makes me feel bad. I also want to do better this year. I would like to try this.
You got this. If you need help enjoying those times more often head on over to my channel and request a video! I got some great info! Much love, Kate :).
I like that she makes it timed. I think it will certainly help with the redundancy and make the time more meaningful 💕
What a terrific idea. We do something similar... we call it ✨Magic time✨ afterschool. The rule- no electronic and they get to choose what they want to do. This has been some of the sweetest times with my kids. (17&9 years old)
Ashley Garner do you have any tips because I have 3 boys 17,12 and 11 and the only thing that occupies there time is electronics. when I have tried in the past to have Mom and sons time of no electronics they pick whatever they like. they have flat out told me I don't want to spend time unless we can play a video game together and everything else is boring (that I offer). 🙁
If he really sad if I know my parents will tuck me in for 15 mins. Like a set time.
But glad it works for everyone !
I understand parents have a gazillion responsibilities.
This is such a great idea! My kids argue non stop about what seems like nothing to us parents but are huge things to them. I'm definitely trying this with them.
Wow your day so special....choosy......yes yes yes .....beautiful....we do love you all
I did the same thing with my three, and it worked great! They're all grown now, and all very well adjusted, responsible adults.
that's so cute i'm in tears.
Wow. I love this so much. Seriously I cried thinking about this with my own kids. I love this idea soo much.
Thank you for spending one-on-one time with your kids! (I wish I'd had that growing up.)
LOVE this, Jordan! It's amazing what special time with mom or dad, and a little time for the kiddo to be in the lead can do to help with behavioral problems.
I don't have kids but this is the best advice I've ever heard! I'll try my hardest to remember and do it whenever I have kids!
Oh you're a genius! We will definitely give this a try! Our kids constantly bicker too and mama is done! Thank you!
I think I need to try this in the coming years 😀 We have two boys ages 3 & 2 and they can constantly fight 😫 I know that I need to make myself sit down and play more like you said! I feel like I'm also constantly having to decide who's turn it is or who had what. And it needs to stop. I constantly feel like I say no no no all the time! Thanks for the tips!
I love your videos so much Jordan! even though I'm a teenager and I don't need this advice right now I just kind of enjoy them and I have a good time❤ Sometimes I'll suggest my parents your advices and they have helped us a lot👏🔝
What a great idea.....we are definitely going to try this! Thanks for sharing!
I started doing the special tuck in time with my 4 little ones several months ago and it's been the best thing ever! They all look forward to thier special night and the one on one time with mom and dad!
I love this positive idea! With now 3 boys this will be a nice solution. My 2 and 4 year old get along most of the time but lets keep it real everyone deserves to have a special day :D Thanks Jordan
I don't have kids that fight bc they are older & far apart in age....however, we used to (and I need to go back & do it) take one kid out on a date with mom and/or dad ONLY once a week. They loved it!!! Great video Jordan 😉
This will be a game changer in our family! Thank you for sharing ♥️
This is a great idea Jordan. I think my 2.5 year old might be too young as he might not understand so may wait a little while...he's in the glorious "throw a fit stage for no reason" stage :) It's amazing how such a little time dedicated to one child makes a difference for them...love it!
We do something similar with our (now) 6 yr old twins. God, it is nonstop bickering and fighting. We bought a new chaise earlier this year and the moment it landed in our house there was FIGHT on who sits on it. So, I we decided on M,W,F is kid 1 sits on it and T,Th,Sa is kid 2 turn. Same with who picks songs for the day we follow the same pattern of days to keep it simple. We've been doing this for a while and it works. Less fighting. However, I do like the special tuck in/play time idea. I'll add that as well cuz right now with summer they get NO break from each other and there the amount of fights going on is insane and all I do is constantly disciplining them. Which I really don't want to do.
OMG!!! thank you for this tip!! I'll do this!!! I have only two kids and it's hard to give time to both, they are different and they want different things almost all the time. Thank you so much for sharing your life and tips with us. Love you!
Oh I love that. Consistency is so important with kids. I need to do more one on one time.
Wow....This is such a good video and I needed it so much!!! Thank you! So a couple things...1 - where is your top from???? So stinking cute! 2 - Could you do a video on your child that took a long time to talk and is hard to communicate with sometimes? Would be super interested in how you deal with that. Thanks for all your videos! You're one of my favs by far!
love this idea i have 3 boys of mine own that drive me crazy with the fighting about these things. I am so glad i found your channel you have helped me out alot. thank you so much
Loooove this idea!!! I've been having such guilt about not spending enough quality time with my kids! Problem solved! Thank you💖
This actually a very clever idea 💡
my kiddos are much older but i think this well work with when we go out to eat.
Great idea! I have 2 kids (6 & 4 yrs), the used to fight all the time so we tried almost everything. what worked for us were board games (from Monopoly to chess), they pick a game and we play it until dinnertime
We have 4 kids and we do one on one dates with them every weekend. We rotate who goes and they choose which parent to take on a date. Normally we try to do 2 dates a weekend so there isn’t much space in between their one on one time. It seems to make everyone happier. Our dates are normally going to breakfast or going out for ice cream or something like that.
I have 2 young kids and they are always arguing now, it gets so frustrating. Thank you for your tips!
Great idea! It's so important to spend one on one time with all your children.
It really is so important!
I love your tuck in time idea!!’
The special tuck in time is a great idea. I'm wondering if your other children during this time are allowed to join in? Or do you explain, they have to wait?
Janna Banigan wondering the same thing. I have tried this method before but had to stop because it back fired because I didn't know what to do with the other kids while I had one on one time with the other....
Mommy Ofthree I have watched other vlogs and they do it at bed time so all the other kids are in bed when they get their special tuck in time
All your ideas are great and very realistic. I can't thank you enough for this channel.
🥰
love this idea and thanks so much for sharing. I especially hope you are enjoying all your boys on the boys cruise!!!
I used to do that with my kids. I only had two at a time that were in 'bicker stage.' Anytime a choice came up that day, if it was an odd numbered day of the week, the one who had an odd numbered birthday got to make the choice and same for the even birthday numbered child on even numbered days. Obviously you have to have kids this applies to or you can use the number that relates to their month of birth or just flat choose which is which. Anyway, as you say, Jordan, it makes life MUCH easier and they can't argue with the day of the week it is. Mission accomplished! :D
I love this!!! I also struggle with sitting down and playing with my kids! I am definitely going to try this!! Thank you for sharing!
This is great I'm going to try this! Thank you, Jordan!
I love love love the extra one of one time at night. Thanks for sharing. I'm going to start this next week!
I seen this similar thing on another vloggers video but alternating the days with her kids, and since I have three I loved the idea and it totally works for the most part for our family. I think that other parents should at least give it a try. 😊
That's so awesome! What can we do without women. To every woman or girl out there, you deserve respect and honor. We men and boys are helpless without you! We are not complete. But you guys have leadership skills, you are fun, kind, loving, funny, and respectful. I hope I have those qualities in my future wife one day. I'm only 15 so what can I say. A kid can dream 😋 I need to keep my eyes on God right now though, and share His Love and what He has done for us all with the world and all things shall fall into place in Jesus name, Amen!
I will definitely be trying this once my kiddos get a bit older! Love this idea! Thanks so much!
I love the idea, its very new to meee, this will help our family! Thanks for sharing!
I love you soo much! You have truly been an inspiration in my daily life! Mid lifeing is hard adulting and you have been such a great role model!
Oh my! I am also not a "player"! I am the everything but play parent! My son (12) has many mental health issues (ADHD, ocd, depression, anxiety, extreme intelligence, self harm 😧) and his therapist has just given me 'homework'; I have to spend 15 mins playing with my daughter everyday. It is soooo hard for me. Given my sons issues, our house is a daily war zone and I'm just mentally exhausted. Glad to hear this works for you as it gives me some hope!?
Heidi McDowell Hi! I'm curious about your therapists suggestion: I expected your comment to say you were supposed to play with your son for 15 minutes a day, but it said to play with your daughter??? can you explain the therapists thoughts behind this?
Meg J not to interject but I imagine that because they spend so much time with their son that they probably have no time for the daughter and need to make time for her- just assuming! 😉
Meg J Through my sons therapist we have learned that my daughter is an 'explosive child'. My son has commanded so much attention and time that my daughter has been left behind in a way. Our house is 'toxic' to be blunt! My children have to be separate most of the time due to hostility from both of them. My son is receiving services through a fantastic mental health center so we are able to learn a lot about both kids through them. I have been fighting/advocating for my son for 10 years and finally now getting results. There is much damage and learned behaviors that need to be corrected so the 15 mins. of play is simply a starting point. I just have to learn how to 'play'! 😟
Heidi McDowell, I really can't understand why people in US put labels on these kind of personalities! They are just highly emotional folks) it's not an issue!( omg I bet they'll try to put a label on my boy when he will attend a school, but I don't care)
Heidi McDowell bless your heart, for real! my children have some of what you've described, so I really appreciate sharing your experience. that one on one time is so precious, yet hard to always make happen. good luck to you!
Can you do a video of your kids bedroom and how you organize their clothes and toys, socks, jackets, and books?
This is so encouraging! Thanks for sharing your wisdom.
I am currently doing your PBC course and loving it. This is so genius and is really helping with so many issues in our house. Thank you so much I can't wait to talk about how we have been implementing this!
I'm so glad to hear that you're loving it! Thank you for sharing!
@@jordanpagecompany where is this course found?
Awesome advice! I've been trying to figure out a similar system especially since my oldest heard a friend's family does this and he would really like it as well. Tfs!!!
What an incredible idea!!! I have a teen and “our surprised” 2 year old and they fight all the time! Going to try this for sure.
love it gonna give it a try. trial and error with kids always learning and changing
OMG I needed this so bad. I’ve been a freeb for years now but I don’t think I’ve ever seen this video! lol so doing this immediately!
I had to stop watching the purging video when I saw this. Brilliant. Read. My. Mind.
Now that's what I call a bang up idea , Jordan !!!
- Dwight
Love this idea. With 10 kids though it will take us 2 weeks to get through them each once but still worth it 👌🏻
It definitely will still be worth it!
Hi .great idea .you think it's going to work with older kids I have five my 13 and 11 years old boy's are fights all day 😢😢😢
So how does this settle the arguments between the rest? For instance the plates... kid of the day gets first choice but does he/she also pick for the rest? Like if kid 2 and 3 both want the blue plate?
Over time (with the special attention), the kids feel more secure because they feel more connected to parents, listened to, and that their opinion matters. The bickering and pickiness comes from feeling like they weren't getting enough attention, or being noticed/heard.
Thanks 🙏 for this info! My kids are ALWAYS fighting! Can't wait to try it!
Great idea! TFS I've got five kids also. 18, 17, 7 and 5 year old girls and a 3 year old boy.
I have basically the same ages as you (now). My oldest is 8 and my youngest is 20 months. 5 kiddos and you sounded EXACTLY like them when you fought with yourself about the color plate 😂 When your son said “I get to pray” I was like SOLD!!!!!! My blessings fight about who gets to say prayers/blessing at dinner 😳 Yes, they even fight over Jesus. 🤦🏼♀️ Implementing this in my house would be amazing for that predinner show down!
So currently our dinner gets cold as 5 children each say a prayer out loud. 🤦🏼♀️ And I’m sure you’ve heard a 3 year old pray. 😅 Implementing this now.
Great idea! I need as many no-brainers as possible!
This is awesome! Reminds me of when my siblings and I would fight over sitting in the front seat. My mom started giving us each a month where we sat in the front seat and we rotated. It stopped the fighting.
I'm so excited to try this!!! Your vides are fantastic and i enjoy being able to watch them and learn from you!!
Omg...Jordan you are a life saver. I love it!
Oh my gerrrrsh! Thank you! I have 3 kiddos and my two oldest will NOT stop bickering! Going to try this!!!!
You are such a brilliant lady 🥰
Omg Jordan I just paused ur video just to right this msg
I love this method nd definitely will be doing it with my 2 kids😊
I know how u feel about not playing with ur kids I forget to nd this is sooo good for so many reasons 👌
Thank u soo much I love watching u with ur family❤️
Xx
This is such a great idea!!! It’s so simple that everyone could do it. Thank you for making great videos that everyone can follow along with! Much love from Oklahoma
How amazing! Simple but soo big! I love it!
Soooo sweet!! Amazing idea!
I look forward to trying this because my kids drive me nuts!!!!! Thank you!!
Awesome!! hope you guys are having a great vacation!
That's brilliant! We have an only child, so it's his special day every day, and he doesn't even know how lucky he is :-)
LOVE your ideas where do you come up with all of this. Definitely gonna try this with my kiddos.
My family is going to try this starting tomorrow!
I love this idea, where were you when my kids were young😃
Our kids are now in their 20's and 30's...oops oldest just turned 40! But we did this and yes it helped so much. Young parents give this a try, you won't regret it.