Quiet firing, where the boss makes your life hell so you quit. If they have an axe to grind they will not give you chance to improve but they will just keep you in the dark and give you all the menial jobs such as mucking out the dirty grease traps or the rancid waste management duties so that you quit. They are often reticent to use the sacking procedure as they know it could have legal repercussions for them such as appeals for unfair dismissal or severance. Also a boss who befriends you but when you are no longer useful they discard you.
@@Uksoapfan this is why I hate the term Quiet Firing - it's Forced Resignation. It's extremely toxic, shockingly common (not a new trend, it's been around of decades), and in the same places that it proliferates because of employee protection laws it's also typically illegal.
@@JenniferBrick I only heard of the term "quiet firing" recently, and I am 41 now. I always called it "pushing someone out of their job" but forced resignation sounds a better term. A boss tried to do it to me once. I had a bit of a row with him over something and I think he held a grudge. Bosses who hold grudges are the worst as they have that power.
Long term employees who cause high turnover was so prevalent at one place I worked at. Openly harassing the new hires and creating toxicity all around. I was so surprised how many of them didn’t get fired.
Currently dealing with this. One dumpster employee gathered 2 lap dog employees around him to protect himself and now they are bullying the rest. Can’t actually wait to leave this place
Typically grocery stores are like this because it’s a union job; the union protects bad employees by making the process of termination of employment very difficult and expensive because these employees have more legal protections than non union employees. Usually the toxic employees can’t work anywhere else because they don’t have higher education or other jobs skills along with criminal records that prevent them from being hired.
And that's only the half of it. I cringe everytime manager says "We are a family" and everytime I suggest something manager makes sure to point out to everyone of my colleagues that I only think about myself and gaslights me often. I used to love working where I work. Everything changed in less than 6months and I never felt so expandable
I had someone say that they felt like I didn’t like them because I never tell them personal things about myself. I was floored by the self centeredness and manipulation for details. All they want to do is use your personal information against you! Don’t fall for it. 🤦♂️❌❌❌
A guy who joined my department some years ago (former employer) used to ask people inappropriate questions including pay, union etc, he also asked people about their performance reviews they had with their supervisor and pestered people on their lunch about it (he followed me into the toilet's one time just to get info from me - creepy I know). He was doing this when he was supposed to be working. He was reported to HR/floor manager etc for harassment and potential data breach (he was working in an environment where data protection etc was strict. He only got his job because they were desperate for staff. Creepy and pathetic. Have a good day reader
@@PraveenSrJ01 yes I know. He didn't seem to understand people comfort zone etc but he understood when I told him to **** off lol. Have a good day reader
I was accused of not being "open and honest" because I wouldn't share everything that was going on in my personal life with them. But my manager had pulled my coworker in meeting to tell her she was a bad mom. A week before, this same coworker had shared that she felt like a bad mom because she worked. That kinda stuff is why I never shared. 🥴
I was told once in a 1:1 that I appeared standoffish at company happy hours and functions... and my response was 'Think about the vibe and body language of those at these functions toward people that don't have trust funds nor went to an Ivy league school... and then you'll know why I give off a standoffish vibe.. because I get a vibe I'm not welcome'
Yesterday was my last day at a job like this. I'm glad I didn't get stuck because imagine the power gaslighting has over people. ALWAYS trust your intuition.
Giant red flag: nepotism arrangements. When the boss' wife/husband works in the office. Especially if they're not qualified for the role. Run far, far away and don't ever accept the job. Nothing good ever comes out of that. Or any form of nepotism really (friends, family members, etc). You, as the employee, will always be "wrong". Not to mention, if you have a legitimate complaint about a spouse, you can't exactly bring that up to the boss. Nepotism harms morale in the office.
I wish I knew this sooner. I got a job due to a family friend but unfortunately the cracks that come with husband/ wife boss is that they are bias and don’t hold each other responsible. They make their personal problems everyone else’s in the workplace. It’s horrible. It’s bad for family dynamics since some use their family standing or company standing to manipulate the other person. It’s a lose lose situation.
I work for a company where the owner hired his two unemployed sons as Vice Presidents. Of course everything has gone to crap and th3 boys are taking us down. Yes, nepotism sucks.
I worked at a company ten years ago, where I had a two-hour orientation, then spent the rest of my first week loading software on my company laptop. If your software didn't work, you had to figure it all out yourself, then ask for help later. If you had to ask anyone to fix anything more than once, you got lectured about how "we're having this conversation again"!
A guy asked me every day for a month "your back? Your still here?" It wasnt until 3rd month that i realized it was so so toxic because the first company i worked at was amazing. So i just assumed it wasnt as nice but then i realized it was not just not as nice hut actually incredibly toxic. Still trying to get out 9 montns later but job market is tough and i dont want to jump into another shit show.
Lmao, the company I just quit won "2nd best place to work" in a city of 262k people... I shudder to imagine what the thousands of other companies are like! 🥸
they expect you to be a copycat of them.. wear and think and behave the same as them or else.. they would either bully you or consider you an enemy/outsider 🙄🙄🙄
My current Job has so many of these. When I interviewed they told me I got a 1st shift position. So I quit my other job only for them to tell me on my first day of work that the 1st shift job was no longer available and I had to be put on third shift. 5 different people got turned in to HR in one week for various reason. Then they always hit you with the "We're Family" although they have a high turnover and gossip about the same people they have such with everyday. We work 7 days a week so there is no life work balance. I also have a co-worker that would ignore me and roll their eyes at me when I would speak. Once I started distancing myself I became the bad guy and start hearing rumors. Then people started taking sides while I just want to do my job and go home...It's a highly aggressive atmosphere for no reason. It's an easy job.
I'm submitting my resignation letter on Monday. Been working at my current toxic workplace for three years and things are only going from bad to worse. Getting out before shit gets real. The long-term employees are usually the bullies who work the least. The worse thing is management knows but still decide to retain them.
I work at a grocery store..... the people aren't bad... it's a toxic woker... he doesn't do anything.. I'm always busting my butt.... its getting to the point where I don't wanna be there anymore..I don't know what to do....
It was pretty recent revelation for me that a proper onboarding is common practice. I've only been properly on-boarded once, and it was one of the best jobs i had
Yes, I’ve always worked for small companies and the first jobs I had over a decade ago didn’t do a lot of onboarding. My more recent jobs have been better at it. In my early work years, onboarding was a co-worker, hopefully someone who recently had my new job but not always, showing me my basic responsibilities for an hour or two than a packet on how to enroll for health insurance and the 401K.
She’s describing my company and the toxic people in power to a tea! Unfortunately I need the money badly but I think I’ll phase myself out and transfer to another store if I can. Working on it!
I had two short lived experiences with family owned companies, and I definitely don't recommend. First of all: the owner can do whatever. They don't have to respond to a board or shareholders. It the owner reads that the colour blue will improve the productivity, be prepared to paint walls during a weekend. If you don't attend a family event you're fried. If siblings start fighting each other they will use the members of each department as infantry soldiers. Yet they will still go to mama's brunch every Sunday. These are companies that have long term employees who have always done things "that way", and even if you are hired to improve processes and systems the resistance will be fierce. Of course there are exceptions, but I've heard dozens of stories which together with my own experience make me keep a safe distance from this kind of business.
Funny story: to prep for this video I wrote a list of all my experiences I had in secretly toxic workplaces, and one I wouldn't call toxic itself, but there was a toxic owner for what was a family business. He used to go out drinking with his friends from lunch onwards on Friday - they'd often come in the office, completely out of it, and try to order me to join them. Major ick.
@@JenniferBrick a quite technical one, I was CIO of a global Telecom company and I had this excellent Oracle DBA who was invited to become Data Manager in a family owned company. When he came to me to give his letter of resignation I told him not to go and showed him all the risks of a small family owned business. He wanted to become a manager, I couldn't promote him at that noment and he left to make 25% more. Fast forward the owner takes a shuttle from Rio to Sao Paulo, meets an old friend who tells him that SQL Server is cheaper and as reliable as Oracle. So he comes back, communicates my friend that they would pursue another technology and fires him 😐 before he could even do any work (26 days of employment). Unfortunately I couldn't rehire him, but I helped him to find a place in another global telecom company. Making a little less than what he was making with us. Changing jobs demands a thorough risk analysis...
One of the biggest mistakes I see people make is focusing on short term payoffs. Career decisions have to play out long term. Even if his move as manager with a part increase vetted out the same, his mobility at the major telecomm probably would have been better. I get it when the decision is for work environment (I left the biggest SaaS company in the world to go to a pressed startup), but not when it's for the job title.
If they say we're a family lol at the interview it's a major red flag lol. Yes, working in a family run business is brutal I can also confirm that. Have a good day reader
Yes! On one hand it shows “retention” but on the other hand certain long timers think they know everything and they paid their dues and everyone must bow to them. What’s even worse is when the upper managers don’t care and let those people act however they want with no repercussions. It’s so toxic and unprofessional.
Hi Jennifer- can you please make a video on that point you brought up at at 7:12; long term employees that have been in the compnay for ages combined with a group of quick turn around. I experiece this at my last job. Some employees had been there for ages but the ones that pointed out issues were quick to leave or laid off. I'm very interested to hear more about this :), thanks for all your videos.
I can do that, but not on RUclips (my cost of production is really high here so I have to prioritize videos). I can make a video over on TikTok though if you follow me there!
I experienced such an experience. I was told I could improve but I was given all the graveyard shift over the summer when everyone else was on leave. There was nothing wrong with me during this period. After they returned I was told I was struggling and underperforming. Those staff ratted me out constantly and I started getting frosty treatment from them - there was nothing wrong when it suited and everything wrong when it it didn't suit. The place was also full of smiling assassin's. I now work with a better employer with great benefits besides money. I used a bad experience to get something better. Have a good day reader.
I think most of the workplaces are toxic. How to find a good one? And also, if you leave frequently companies wouldn't want to employ you. And how to leave so that you are satisfied? What to tell them?
I’m at a company that calls itself “a family.” Uh-huh😝. Another thing that can lead to toxicity is family owed. Just found out my boss is the daughter of the President so I’m very cautious about what I say to her. That makes me uncomfortable.
I've worked at 3 toxic employers. One was rated one of the best employers in Canada but during my 4 years there, management decided to go Theory X. Another company had a few aggressive employees who figured if you weren't getting ulcers, you weren't really working. They would bend over backwards to help you one day only to send an ego mail to you the next day about some concern they had about your work and CC half the department. Upper management realized there was an issue and brought in a consultant to have workshops with employee groups, but I don't think the main culprits were told to follow professional business etiquette or their employment would be terminated. A third company has a good culture but their clients were all toxic plus management tried to keep the headcount low so it was very stressful working there.
Omg...you hit the nail on the head about the revolving door and how the office leadership will blame those leaving...however the ones who stay usually get promoted. I am living this nightmare. I discovered the company had a handful of employees who have been around for 20+ years and everyone else has been around 6 months or less. That means something terrible has happened but like you mentioned earlier - no one really talks (just crickets). Heard a few whispers about investigations pending but it's enough to make you want to head for the nearest door.
Dear god this is me, I’m one of the ones that stayed got stuck watching new hires leave, but it wasn’t always like this management cared about their staff a while back but it’s different now, the calls and messages at all hours, interruptions during vacation constantly being threatened by my boss, “if I get fired I taking others down with me” it’s sad to say for a place I loved working but after 39 years I’m ready to go.😢
Working after hours is way beyond my tolerance and is a clear sign of a toxic job. I despise jobs with no boundaries and expect people to respect my personal time. This is something I won’t negotiate with or compromise on. No!
At almost every job I had the break area was a mess despite signage like " Your Mom Doesn't Work Here , Please Clean Up When Done " ..I'm not a neat freak but I believe it's a common courtesy to tidy up after eating .. Have a Great Day Jennifer 😊
I get anxious in cluttered and disorganized spaces. So I was the office mom who moon lighted as an executive but started most days doing ditches - and avoiding the mice!!
I'd head back to have lunch and often there was a coworker sitting with his sweaty hairy leg up on the table because it was his sore leg. I used Clorox wipes a lot. He said he wasn't a maid. I told him it's common courtesy like you did to clean up our own messes. But he didn't. He quit so I have an appetite now
@@JenniferBrick Same here being mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for 12 years. Top workers for 38 years have never been suspended. Jealousy and misery. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, i dink, i'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. They removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroys my reputation. I will never quit to make these bums ever win and if I transfer to another hospital and mobbing starts again I don't know all the managers ect like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. Never let bullies try to control you from quitting. Never let bums win in life.
How did you manage that? Please give me your advice as I'm coming to the conclusion that in this field they're mostly highly toxic environments and I don't think I can handle this again. I have enough of a toxic family and toxic work environment. 🤗
For me, the top indicator is when management tell you we’re all equal here and there’s no judgement, but then they play rank trumps with you and you end up in HR meetings…
I worked at a manufacturing company owned by a large multi-national conglomerate. One winter, mice got into the hollow space in one of the walls and one of them must have died in there as there was a putrid smell that permeated the department. Budgets were supposedly tight at that time so management wouldn't allow the building maintenance crew to cut open the wall to try and remove dead mouse. We were told to "suck it up" and wait it out.
This really made me laugh. I make good money hauling chemicals to slaughter plants and slaughter - byproduct processing plants. Lol one dead mouse? Dude try 50 tons of bones and guts in 95 degree heat. This is the reality of our food production logistics chain.
@@lesterdiamond6190You signed up for a job that requires the smell to be awful,so it's expected. The OP is working at a desk job where the smell of dead animals isn't the norm.
I just had a chat with a recruiter. I’m looking for a marketing job with a flexible work schedule. When I asked if they had a flexible work schedule, the recruiter went into how they company works to promote “work-life integration” rather than “work-life-balance.” This didn’t directly answer my question but was a red flag. What exactly does this mean??
What it should mean is that work and personal are fluid and you can be where you need to be; there will be give and take. Mostly how that translates is they'll expect you to do work during personal time, and it's more taking than giving. Dig in and ask questions around core hours, what integration looks like in practice, and work and digital boundaries.
Thank you so much for summing up my entire job!! I been finding the best way to describe high school minded zealots!! Most the people at my workplace has been there for 4 years ++ longest 20 and everyone new came and left immediately. I see why now
oh yes, i related to a few things in this video. in particular i worked for a Coke for 6 months. the shortest amount of time ive ever kept a job. there was no structure whatsoever and cliques. all that i could deal with, not really, but, it was my day off and the phone rang at 530am, in which i was awakened, and was asked about something i did 2 weeks ago. i was asked why i sounded out of it, and explained it was my day off, and the response was "oh... well anyway ..." at tot hat theyd change my schedule and route without telling me and id get called at 11pm and be told about this, and then explain i needed to being at 5am the following day. on my last day, i worked the way they said i did, slow and sloppy, and when i went to the main office to hand in my phone they didnt care, they took my badge and phone, not even a "thank you" or "why are you quitting?" just "ill take those then." and walked away from at the office door. was there any surprise why the turn over was so high?
I was looking at applying at the Coke distributor in my area, but after reading review after review after review on every site saying it would be 6 days a week 10-14 hours a day because they are so short staffed and can not keep people there was no way I could do it.
Wow. Most of these apply to my current job. I’m number 1,2 and 4. In less than seven hours I have to go to that place and I dread it. They take your number one reason too far and I have repeatedly refused to participate. I’m so stressed that I lock up everything even my water when I take breaks. I’m just not happy. 😮
Im in training to be manager. We had an opening for a 2nd asst manager. District mgr hired a guy who used to work there. He talks tto much, yells at customers and tattled on the mgr and me for petty things. We are watching each others backs. The district mgr is a narc and new guy is flying monkey. Im looking for new job
@@JenniferBrick thanks so true but he's planning to retire in a year or 2 or 3 or really soon if the tattling bs continues. It's easy to see golden boy wants to be Mgr. Sigh. What a ride I just got on. Time for me to move on. The business greatly improved with us over the last year and this is what we get in return
Golden Boy ends up one of two places: in power because he appealed to the narcissist and now the narcissist think Golden Boy will carry out his legacy. Or, Golden Boy makes a mismove and subtly puts the narcissist legacy at risk. He doesn't want someone who will fill his shoes, he wants someone to take over who will pale in comparison (none of this is based on reality or facts, just the narcissist feels). For your sake I hope it's the latter and not the former.
I was hired and asked to start next day. Manager left me alone after 2 hours to figure out things on my own. It was a daycare. I had six kids to look after. Fun times.
Hi Jennifer, you are reading my mind when you talked on 3:00 part, I’ve identified red flags everywhere and people on revolving door, Whats your advice? I can’t leave , it pays great in the largest company on earth but the management is toxic and incompetent😢
Sometimes it’s a good thing that coworkers don’t invite you out to things. Typically the outgoing ones will probably roofie your drink or set you up for failure for them to gossip about. I know being lonely sucks but it’s better than being with assholes at least
5:22 Smh 🤦🏽♀️ That too! Self onboarding 😮 no clear direction or leadership at all. That should have been my clue aside from the unfriendliness during the initial interview process.
1:09 omg this is so important. I was dealing with emeshment in my last job. I felt obligated to stay and also the treatment felt like the little sibling that you pile all the grunt work on and these older employees just do whatever they want. They keep secrets and also not take any responsibility for their mistakes. It was hard to talk to them even though I tried on multiple occasions, it felt fruitless since they would just keep me in the dark. I’m so glad I finally left and well I would suggest: LEAVE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE AND DONT ASK FOR PERMISSION! Toxic jobs don’t care about you.
Another huge red flag is when you talk about the work you're doing outside the office - maybe to someone in another company or maybe at a conference, and people are visibly impressed. Then you go back to your office and you feel barely adequate and barely tolerated, despite the fact that your coworkers do a fraction of what you do. You can conclude here that you've already proven your worth but that your workplace refuses to recognize it.
To be honest, there is some level of toxicity in any workplace. There is always something to feel pissed off about. The thing is we ourselves should not be a part of this cycle. If any bad behavior is happening, we should not contribute to that. Just stay respectful and professional and the rest will be OK.
OMG! I can’t stop laughing!!!This is SO on point with experiences that I have had that I want to know where you have your camera and mic hidden 😂 Why is this so common?
Humans love to think they're unique and special - but they're not. The toxic people that create toxic work environments are generally traumatized, reactive, and as a result are predictable AF.
Impulsive power grabbing is in itself a trauma response IMHO. Most empire builders I have encountered have a raging lack of worthiness they're trying to placid with position (they think 'if I am important, I'll feel important' - it doesn't work and leads to all sorts of nastiness because that feeling of being unworthy gets worse as they acquire power).
Watch out for leadership that wants to keep the company growing - no matter what. When things change in the economy, the stress to produce gets crazy high.
Wow, I am a programmer, and when you mentioned that you aren't so good at "Attention to Detail," I feel that. I've had meeting where I was blamed for a word that should have been captialized and wasn't on a website that was still in development. The text was sent to me via email and was cut and pasted in the editor, and the word wasn't capitialized in the email and I missed it. Later, I was in another meeting where I capitialized the same work on the same website, and was called into a meeting where I was blamed for chaning the text I was send. That place was toxic af; and I no longer work there.
I made the mistake texting “PERIODT ❤” in my work group chat. I’m so embarrassed I even apologized, I mistaken the text to my personal friends group chat, I’m now freaking out and scared I’m literally gonna be isolated or lose my job because it seems, I’m not fitting in. It’s like high school all over again
When I think back to work places that I should’ve left sooner, the first one that comes to mind is the one where my coworker who was supposed to be training me was telling me about her abusive, ex-boyfriend and how she’s a Wiccan. She ended up framing me for all of her mistakes, which I didn’t find out about till later. nearly destroyed my self-esteem. Bad workplace
Red flag, when you are a contractor, and your management tells you you’re considered family with the client you are working for, they are lying. GTFOT.
Jennifer, you're a brilliant, charming beautiful woman. I learned a lot watching your funny, creative and very thoughtful videos. I am in a job where a cobra would quit.. I sent out my updated resumé to a company I wanted to work at. I did a deep dive and recently obtained an interview. With your tips I aced the interview and today they called to announce that they were happy to hire me.. So.. That's your impact ❤.. Please continue. You're a gem 💎 🙏
My former project had a bunch of turnover, gossiping and people trying to meet up at 6pm on a Friday after work to drink. The kicker was an underqualified female boss who got her position through years of sitting in meetings.
My boss just called, it was one of the "performance issue" call and this is what he said " you take this job like a 9-5" he said it like its a bad thing. Bro he was paying me intern wages,and expecting to work like i own the product and its profits. Idc i quit ,even the best performing employee told me that the work culture is toxic especially.
2:44 Hahah SAME 5:30 Im 4 years into my first job and I had this experience. It was unbelievably overwhelming BUT I now love it. Top management: Completely incompetent & knows nothing about the business, facility, or general operations. I am a self starter, Im lazy, and I get bored easily. I learn a task (managing inventory, invoice, requisitioning, service ticket system, tool training, federal cost accounting, software development, facility safety, internship program management, legal compliance), I automate it because Im lazy, I get a new task because Im bored Since upper management is so tuned out they don't care about things like "job description", "responsibilities", or "hours". I come in and leave whenever I want. I takeover anything that interests me. I get 15% promotions per year because when someone leaves they don't get replaced (because I have already replaced their function). I average 13 hours a week and am well positioned to take over a 800 user clean room facility at 28. I got very lucky. My weird personality made me perfectly suited for this toxic job
I had someone tell me that I was an accident looking for a place to happen. I said “other people have accidents too.” They said “we’re not talking about other people. We are talking about you!” 😮
While there wasn't much to do at my last job, basically guarding an empty building, that didn't mean there weren't things to do. Guess who reported most of the building issues? And guess who left? If that building falls apart, not my issue because there's 6 other people throughout the day to notice things.
At this point I think there needs to be an entirely different system in place with management. I feel as if they shouldn't be in charge of your payroll, schedules, or your chance of promotion because all 3 of those can always be toyed with whenever they feel like retaliating or if they simply just don't like you. It just gives them too much power and an advantage point over you. I was literally quiet fired because I had a store manager who personally didn't like me at work and yet I have not gave her any reason to. I worked 11-12 hour shifts and pulled my weight with no call offs and yet she cut my hours down to 17 a week, demoted me and clocked everything I did on the job. I eventually became mentally drained from dealing with that and just left. Thankfully I have people in my life to fall back on because the job market is harsh right now
I didnt know i worked one day and after an hour when my shift started i came in, was screamed at by my meth head manager while the big boss stood there silently. Literally the next week my manager didn't show to her shift for 5 hours and the big boss was telling us how because she was late that her dog was probably going to die since she had to stay and couldn't give it their meds. The manager comes in and after a casual apology and buddy buddy talk, the big biss just laughed and said it was fine.. wtf
What’s interesting to me is that some of these toxic workplace signs were almost praised or at least tolerated as being a fact of life not too long ago. Don’t get me wrong; I’m glad this shit is getting called out and is not as tolerated or promoted. Only 5-10 years ago I would come across articles about the need to keep answering emails while on vacation. Answering emails from some exotic location isn’t a vacation to me. Or the one about an absence of onboarding. I remember one of my bosses from years ago who was considered successful. She owned the company, which was a small company. She recalled in her first office job, probably back in the early ‘80s, she arrived at work to nothing but an empty desk. She said her boss wanted to test how resourceful she was. She said this with a reverent tone like she super respected this boss. I’m thinking, “Why should she waste time tracking down basic office supplies on her first day?” I also seem to recall this boss was exceptionally good at onboarding, compared to other places I worked. I’ve always worked for small companies and the only onboarding I expected was one of my co-workers showing me the basics of my job and packets on how to enroll in the benefits package.
Jennifer, I’m wondering if you could weigh in on my situation. I feel that at my current company there is no passion or drive to wake up and come to work and it’s toxic but I make good money. I have an opportunity to switch to a career I know I love but it would be for a (still live-able) pay cut. As of now, I am working part time at the job I love, full time at the job i dislike. Should I just stay where I am to make $$ although feeling miserable daily, or make the jump to potentially a more happy, calm lifestyle?
I can't answer that for you, this is something you have to figure out for yourself. I'd ask you this to help you clarify though: What's most important to you right now? Making money, work life balance, mental health, family, etc. Everything is important, but stack rank them - and under no circumstance should you judge or shame yourself for your answers. They're just answers. Based on that, you'll probably have clarity, but from what you describe you'll be sacrificing something for the other thing. To give yourself confidence in the direction, why is it worth it? what do you GAIN (short and long term) by taking that path.
@@JenniferBrick Thanks so much for the response! I really appreciate that outlook, it puts things into perspective better for me because I feel like I didn’t really know the right way to approach my decision. You’re awesome for helping others on their journeys! 😊
Prefect timing. And thanks for the terms of reference that I shall be using ad nauseum for the next few months. I am so traumatized by my promotion. that I am now I am embodying the subtle art of not giving a f@#$. It's a job, that buys tampons. That's it, it's not that deep.
Thank you! The mistake thing happened to me! As a NEW HIRE! She threatened to put me on a plan. Fine. Fire me and spend another year interviewing and training someone new! Lololol
If you are the only person waiting to get interviewed (in waiting area). If they tell you we're a family lol, if they tell you you're amazing incredible (I'm sure you are). If they accept answers that aren't relevant to the post. If it's a customer service type role and you have access to releasing money ie loans insurance mortgage social security etc. If they offer performance related bonuses which the entire department must meet (expect tension with your colleagues). Call center work is generally dreadful work lol I would avoid unless you are desperate. If they offer the same job post frequently (high turnover?). Also check job review sites like indeed and Glassdoor, also do you know anyone that works there? Ask them? Also what do your instincts tell you? If it feels too good to be true it probably is. I have more lol. Have a good day reader.
The project I was assigned at is very toxic. I work in separate team that assigns us to projects that need coverage, so lets say we are rented out there. I like the position itself, as my managers are fantastic people and I have been recognized as valuable employee with on-point opinions. Buuut the project itself ? Calling me in on Teams with no context to just ask aggressive questions about stuff I said 3 months ago... or why i didnt answer one query on the chat.. I was not onboarded at all. they expected me to gather everything myself from day 1 ! they expected me to redo all the documentation dating 3 years back, although they do not understand the documentation themselves. I wanted to be transferred but they have no one new to cover it, as my original team is understaffed.
Which subtle signs of a toxic workplace did you experience?
Psychological unsafe and revolving door.
Quiet firing, where the boss makes your life hell so you quit. If they have an axe to grind they will not give you chance to improve but they will just keep you in the dark and give you all the menial jobs such as mucking out the dirty grease traps or the rancid waste management duties so that you quit. They are often reticent to use the sacking procedure as they know it could have legal repercussions for them such as appeals for unfair dismissal or severance.
Also a boss who befriends you but when you are no longer useful they discard you.
@@yukio_saito two consistencies I've seen in all toxic workplaces.
@@Uksoapfan this is why I hate the term Quiet Firing - it's Forced Resignation. It's extremely toxic, shockingly common (not a new trend, it's been around of decades), and in the same places that it proliferates because of employee protection laws it's also typically illegal.
@@JenniferBrick I only heard of the term "quiet firing" recently, and I am 41 now. I always called it "pushing someone out of their job" but forced resignation sounds a better term. A boss tried to do it to me once. I had a bit of a row with him over something and I think he held a grudge. Bosses who hold grudges are the worst as they have that power.
Long term employees who cause high turnover was so prevalent at one place I worked at. Openly harassing the new hires and creating toxicity all around. I was so surprised how many of them didn’t get fired.
Dealt with this.. infuriating..
Currently dealing with this. One dumpster employee gathered 2 lap dog employees around him to protect himself and now they are bullying the rest. Can’t actually wait to leave this place
Same here! That was my experience as well.
@@DotNetWizardFlying monkeys 🙊
Typically grocery stores are like this because it’s a union job; the union protects bad employees by making the process of termination of employment very difficult and expensive because these employees have more legal protections than non union employees. Usually the toxic employees can’t work anywhere else because they don’t have higher education or other jobs skills along with criminal records that prevent them from being hired.
"we're family but you're replaceable..."
That part and also they are very cliquey and only watch out for themselves
@@chosenonekayyess!! 👏🏻👏🏻
Turn over of adoptions? Of course.. you're just human.
Facts!!!
And that's only the half of it. I cringe everytime manager says "We are a family" and everytime I suggest something manager makes sure to point out to everyone of my colleagues that I only think about myself and gaslights me often. I used to love working where I work. Everything changed in less than 6months and I never felt so expandable
I had someone say that they felt like I didn’t like them because I never tell them personal things about myself. I was floored by the self centeredness and manipulation for details.
All they want to do is use your personal information against you! Don’t fall for it. 🤦♂️❌❌❌
A guy who joined my department some years ago (former employer) used to ask people inappropriate questions including pay, union etc, he also asked people about their performance reviews they had with their supervisor and pestered people on their lunch about it (he followed me into the toilet's one time just to get info from me - creepy I know). He was doing this when he was supposed to be working. He was reported to HR/floor manager etc for harassment and potential data breach (he was working in an environment where data protection etc was strict. He only got his job because they were desperate for staff. Creepy and pathetic. Have a good day reader
@@gerardsloan1593what that guy did was definitely very creepy
@@PraveenSrJ01 yes I know. He didn't seem to understand people comfort zone etc but he understood when I told him to **** off lol. Have a good day reader
I was accused of not being "open and honest" because I wouldn't share everything that was going on in my personal life with them. But my manager had pulled my coworker in meeting to tell her she was a bad mom. A week before, this same coworker had shared that she felt like a bad mom because she worked. That kinda stuff is why I never shared. 🥴
I was told once in a 1:1 that I appeared standoffish at company happy hours and functions... and my response was 'Think about the vibe and body language of those at these functions toward people that don't have trust funds nor went to an Ivy league school... and then you'll know why I give off a standoffish vibe.. because I get a vibe I'm not welcome'
Yesterday was my last day at a job like this. I'm glad I didn't get stuck because imagine the power gaslighting has over people. ALWAYS trust your intuition.
I'm so glad you escaped!
Absolutely!
Giant red flag: nepotism arrangements. When the boss' wife/husband works in the office. Especially if they're not qualified for the role. Run far, far away and don't ever accept the job. Nothing good ever comes out of that. Or any form of nepotism really (friends, family members, etc). You, as the employee, will always be "wrong". Not to mention, if you have a legitimate complaint about a spouse, you can't exactly bring that up to the boss. Nepotism harms morale in the office.
I wish I knew this sooner. I got a job due to a family friend but unfortunately the cracks that come with husband/ wife boss is that they are bias and don’t hold each other responsible. They make their personal problems everyone else’s in the workplace. It’s horrible.
It’s bad for family dynamics since some use their family standing or company standing to manipulate the other person. It’s a lose lose situation.
Oh, so true. Lived this nightmare.
I work for a company where the owner hired his two unemployed sons as Vice Presidents. Of course everything has gone to crap and th3 boys are taking us down. Yes, nepotism sucks.
Once I started seeing my former work place as a cult, it was easier to leave.
SAME
I went to work for a very large law firm that touted its "work-life balance," which turned out to be completely false in practice
Was there idea of work life balance *only* 80 hours a week?
Yeah, the billable hours requirements were still incredibly high and everyone was extremely stressed and overworked
How long ago did you work for the law firm?
@@JenniferBrick 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👏
‘Fake’ mandatory department team meetings where people are cheerleading but after the meeting all you hear are complaints and moans.
Do I work with you?!?! 😂 You described my job!!!
Omg.. we work together! Let's grab lunch!
I worked at a company ten years ago, where I had a two-hour orientation, then spent the rest of my first week loading software on my company laptop. If your software didn't work, you had to figure it all out yourself, then ask for help later. If you had to ask anyone to fix anything more than once, you got lectured about how "we're having this conversation again"!
A guy asked me every day for a month "your back? Your still here?" It wasnt until 3rd month that i realized it was so so toxic because the first company i worked at was amazing. So i just assumed it wasnt as nice but then i realized it was not just not as nice hut actually incredibly toxic. Still trying to get out 9 montns later but job market is tough and i dont want to jump into another shit show.
Avoid places that bang on about their “best place to work awards.” I’ve found them to be the very worst!
Lmao, the company I just quit won "2nd best place to work" in a city of 262k people... I shudder to imagine what the thousands of other companies are like! 🥸
they expect you to be a copycat of them.. wear and think and behave the same as them or else.. they would either bully you or consider you an enemy/outsider 🙄🙄🙄
My current Job has so many of these. When I interviewed they told me I got a 1st shift position. So I quit my other job only for them to tell me on my first day of work that the 1st shift job was no longer available and I had to be put on third shift. 5 different people got turned in to HR in one week for various reason. Then they always hit you with the "We're Family" although they have a high turnover and gossip about the same people they have such with everyday. We work 7 days a week so there is no life work balance. I also have a co-worker that would ignore me and roll their eyes at me when I would speak. Once I started distancing myself I became the bad guy and start hearing rumors. Then people started taking sides while I just want to do my job and go home...It's a highly aggressive atmosphere for no reason. It's an easy job.
Best place to work awards are usually bought or manipulated somehow. Saw this at a previous employer.
I’ve never experienced a workplace that wasn’t toxic.
I'm submitting my resignation letter on Monday. Been working at my current toxic workplace for three years and things are only going from bad to worse. Getting out before shit gets real.
The long-term employees are usually the bullies who work the least. The worse thing is management knows but still decide to retain them.
How's it going? I'm about to leave my toxic workplace as well
I work at a grocery store..... the people aren't bad... it's a toxic woker... he doesn't do anything.. I'm always busting my butt.... its getting to the point where I don't wanna be there anymore..I don't know what to do....
Leave and keep leaving until you find somthing that suits you@@kevin2400
@@Jeb9221 I am going through this...worst part management has now joined in openly...I can't wait to move over to new job...
Worked at a distillery it was wild , so many broken policy’s and people still holding their jobs !
It was pretty recent revelation for me that a proper onboarding is common practice. I've only been properly on-boarded once, and it was one of the best jobs i had
Yes, I’ve always worked for small companies and the first jobs I had over a decade ago didn’t do a lot of onboarding. My more recent jobs have been better at it.
In my early work years, onboarding was a co-worker, hopefully someone who recently had my new job but not always, showing me my basic responsibilities for an hour or two than a packet on how to enroll for health insurance and the 401K.
Actually there can be nothing more toxic than a family, if the family deals with secrets and undealt traumas... That is the worst thing ever
1000% true.
so, saying "we are a family" sounds a bit creepy 😁
Lol surest way to get fired is to hang up a sign that says poor planning on your part doesnt make it and emergency on my part.
I love this. I'd buy a shirt, signs, etc with this.
I've said that to customers multiple times
She’s describing my company and the toxic people in power to a tea! Unfortunately I need the money badly but I think I’ll phase myself out and transfer to another store if I can. Working on it!
I want to someday run my own business. This way it will be a happy,positive work environment.
You have to struggle alot
I had two short lived experiences with family owned companies, and I definitely don't recommend. First of all: the owner can do whatever. They don't have to respond to a board or shareholders. It the owner reads that the colour blue will improve the productivity, be prepared to paint walls during a weekend. If you don't attend a family event you're fried. If siblings start fighting each other they will use the members of each department as infantry soldiers. Yet they will still go to mama's brunch every Sunday.
These are companies that have long term employees who have always done things "that way", and even if you are hired to improve processes and systems the resistance will be fierce.
Of course there are exceptions, but I've heard dozens of stories which together with my own experience make me keep a safe distance from this kind of business.
Funny story: to prep for this video I wrote a list of all my experiences I had in secretly toxic workplaces, and one I wouldn't call toxic itself, but there was a toxic owner for what was a family business. He used to go out drinking with his friends from lunch onwards on Friday - they'd often come in the office, completely out of it, and try to order me to join them. Major ick.
@@JenniferBrick a quite technical one, I was CIO of a global Telecom company and I had this excellent Oracle DBA who was invited to become Data Manager in a family owned company. When he came to me to give his letter of resignation I told him not to go and showed him all the risks of a small family owned business. He wanted to become a manager, I couldn't promote him at that noment and he left to make 25% more. Fast forward the owner takes a shuttle from Rio to Sao Paulo, meets an old friend who tells him that SQL Server is cheaper and as reliable as Oracle. So he comes back, communicates my friend that they would pursue another technology and fires him 😐 before he could even do any work (26 days of employment).
Unfortunately I couldn't rehire him, but I helped him to find a place in another global telecom company. Making a little less than what he was making with us.
Changing jobs demands a thorough risk analysis...
One of the biggest mistakes I see people make is focusing on short term payoffs. Career decisions have to play out long term.
Even if his move as manager with a part increase vetted out the same, his mobility at the major telecomm probably would have been better. I get it when the decision is for work environment (I left the biggest SaaS company in the world to go to a pressed startup), but not when it's for the job title.
If they say we're a family lol at the interview it's a major red flag lol. Yes, working in a family run business is brutal I can also confirm that. Have a good day reader
When I take PTO, I block numbers. Makes everything better!
😂👍
My first job had the long term veteran employees…never again
Yes! On one hand it shows “retention” but on the other hand certain long timers think they know everything and they paid their dues and everyone must bow to them. What’s even worse is when the upper managers don’t care and let those people act however they want with no repercussions. It’s so toxic and unprofessional.
@@jaydenp4975Not all long term employees are like that 🧐🤔🤫....
Hi Jennifer- can you please make a video on that point you brought up at at 7:12; long term employees that have been in the compnay for ages combined with a group of quick turn around. I experiece this at my last job. Some employees had been there for ages but the ones that pointed out issues were quick to leave or laid off. I'm very interested to hear more about this :), thanks for all your videos.
I can do that, but not on RUclips (my cost of production is really high here so I have to prioritize videos). I can make a video over on TikTok though if you follow me there!
I experienced such an experience. I was told I could improve but I was given all the graveyard shift over the summer when everyone else was on leave. There was nothing wrong with me during this period. After they returned I was told I was struggling and underperforming. Those staff ratted me out constantly and I started getting frosty treatment from them - there was nothing wrong when it suited and everything wrong when it it didn't suit. The place was also full of smiling assassin's. I now work with a better employer with great benefits besides money. I used a bad experience to get something better. Have a good day reader.
@@JenniferBrickthank you so much
@@JenniferBrickcan you make the TikTok a RUclips short? I can’t access tiktok
@@JenniferBrick thank you 🤓
Constantly changing upper management and leadership
I felt a nauseating feeling from the time I sat down on the first day and it left when I walked out.
I think most of the workplaces are toxic. How to find a good one? And also, if you leave frequently companies wouldn't want to employ you. And how to leave so that you are satisfied? What to tell them?
I’m at a company that calls itself “a family.” Uh-huh😝. Another thing that can lead to toxicity is family owed. Just found out my boss is the daughter of the President so I’m very cautious about what I say to her. That makes me uncomfortable.
I've worked at 3 toxic employers.
One was rated one of the best employers in Canada but during my 4 years there, management decided to go Theory X.
Another company had a few aggressive employees who figured if you weren't getting ulcers, you weren't really working. They would bend over backwards to help you one day only to send an ego mail to you the next day about some concern they had about your work and CC half the department. Upper management realized there was an issue and brought in a consultant to have workshops with employee groups, but I don't think the main culprits were told to follow professional business etiquette or their employment would be terminated.
A third company has a good culture but their clients were all toxic plus management tried to keep the headcount low so it was very stressful working there.
Omg...you hit the nail on the head about the revolving door and how the office leadership will blame those leaving...however the ones who stay usually get promoted. I am living this nightmare. I discovered the company had a handful of employees who have been around for 20+ years and everyone else has been around 6 months or less. That means something terrible has happened but like you mentioned earlier - no one really talks (just crickets). Heard a few whispers about investigations pending but it's enough to make you want to head for the nearest door.
Holy shit! I'm only a minute into this and you've already described that cult I worked at.
Perhaps the best summary of a toxic workplace on RUclips.
Dear god this is me, I’m one of the ones that stayed got stuck watching new hires leave, but it wasn’t always like this management cared about their staff a while back but it’s different now, the calls and messages at all hours, interruptions during vacation constantly being threatened by my boss, “if I get fired I taking others down with me” it’s sad to say for a place I loved working but after 39 years I’m ready to go.😢
Working after hours is way beyond my tolerance and is a clear sign of a toxic job. I despise jobs with no boundaries and expect people to respect my personal time. This is something I won’t negotiate with or compromise on. No!
Another toxic sign is family members are in the key roles overseeing confidential information that no one else is privy to.
This was so EPIC! Thank you!
Thanks 🥰
Rampant gossip, unprofessional leadership
Literally described the government job I’m leaving.
I thought government jobs are better. So I heard.
At almost every job I had the break area was a mess despite signage like " Your Mom Doesn't Work Here , Please Clean Up When Done " ..I'm not a neat freak but I believe it's a common courtesy to tidy up after eating .. Have a Great Day Jennifer 😊
I get anxious in cluttered and disorganized spaces. So I was the office mom who moon lighted as an executive but started most days doing ditches - and avoiding the mice!!
I'd head back to have lunch and often there was a coworker sitting with his sweaty hairy leg up on the table because it was his sore leg. I used Clorox wipes a lot. He said he wasn't a maid. I told him it's common courtesy like you did to clean up our own messes. But he didn't. He quit so I have an appetite now
@@JenniferBrick Same here being mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for 12 years. Top workers for 38 years have never been suspended. Jealousy and misery. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, i dink, i'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. They removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroys my reputation. I will never quit to make these bums ever win and if I transfer to another hospital and mobbing starts again I don't know all the managers ect like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. Never let bullies try to control you from quitting. Never let bums win in life.
I quit my corporate job to work by myself as I hate co workers/supervisors
How did you manage that? Please give me your advice as I'm coming to the conclusion that in this field they're mostly highly toxic environments and I don't think I can handle this again. I have enough of a toxic family and toxic work environment. 🤗
@@c3909 hi don’t stress just try and find a job that is easy and doesn’t involve working with other people.
For me, the top indicator is when management tell you we’re all equal here and there’s no judgement, but then they play rank trumps with you and you end up in HR meetings…
I worked at a manufacturing company owned by a large multi-national conglomerate. One winter, mice got into the hollow space in one of the walls and one of them must have died in there as there was a putrid smell that permeated the department. Budgets were supposedly tight at that time so management wouldn't allow the building maintenance crew to cut open the wall to try and remove dead mouse. We were told to "suck it up" and wait it out.
That is not okay.
This really made me laugh. I make good money hauling chemicals to slaughter plants and slaughter - byproduct processing plants.
Lol one dead mouse? Dude try 50 tons of bones and guts in 95 degree heat. This is the reality of our food production logistics chain.
@@lesterdiamond6190You signed up for a job that requires the smell to be awful,so it's expected.
The OP is working at a desk job where the smell of dead animals isn't the norm.
The one place I worked at claimed that "We are family!". Little did we know, it was filled with the owner's legitimate and illegitimate children.
Wow. Just wow...😮
I just had a chat with a recruiter. I’m looking for a marketing job with a flexible work schedule. When I asked if they had a flexible work schedule, the recruiter went into how they company works to promote “work-life integration” rather than “work-life-balance.” This didn’t directly answer my question but was a red flag. What exactly does this mean??
What it should mean is that work and personal are fluid and you can be where you need to be; there will be give and take. Mostly how that translates is they'll expect you to do work during personal time, and it's more taking than giving. Dig in and ask questions around core hours, what integration looks like in practice, and work and digital boundaries.
I always manipulate the male boss so I'm making the decisions from behind the scenes. and the toxic employees are outed.
Thank you so much for summing up my entire job!! I been finding the best way to describe high school minded zealots!! Most the people at my workplace has been there for 4 years ++ longest 20 and everyone new came and left immediately. I see why now
High turnover is always a bad sign
Sometimes being the quiet professional co worker makes you the bad guy. Speaking from experience
And anything you do is never good enough or enough
oh yes, i related to a few things in this video. in particular i worked for a Coke for 6 months. the shortest amount of time ive ever kept a job. there was no structure whatsoever and cliques. all that i could deal with, not really, but, it was my day off and the phone rang at 530am, in which i was awakened, and was asked about something i did 2 weeks ago. i was asked why i sounded out of it, and explained it was my day off, and the response was "oh... well anyway ..." at tot hat theyd change my schedule and route without telling me and id get called at 11pm and be told about this, and then explain i needed to being at 5am the following day. on my last day, i worked the way they said i did, slow and sloppy, and when i went to the main office to hand in my phone they didnt care, they took my badge and phone, not even a "thank you" or "why are you quitting?" just "ill take those then." and walked away from at the office door. was there any surprise why the turn over was so high?
I was looking at applying at the Coke distributor in my area, but after reading review after review after review on every site saying it would be 6 days a week 10-14 hours a day because they are so short staffed and can not keep people there was no way I could do it.
@@HeHateMe1 they don't offer any health benefits either but grind your body down. So there is that.
This is so disappointing to hear, but I'm so glad you sharing your story here helped someone else avoid it!
Oh yeah, I learned the "we're all family" thing the hard way, too. Thank God, I got out of there when I did. No privacy. No boundaries. No trust.
Wow. Most of these apply to my current job. I’m number 1,2 and 4. In less than seven hours I have to go to that place and I dread it. They take your number one reason too far and I have repeatedly refused to participate. I’m so stressed that I lock up everything even my water when I take breaks. I’m just not happy. 😮
I'm the same, it's time to plan an escape route.
Im in training to be manager. We had an opening for a 2nd asst manager. District mgr hired a guy who used to work there. He talks tto much, yells at customers and tattled on the mgr and me for petty things. We are watching each others backs. The district mgr is a narc and new guy is flying monkey. Im looking for new job
That's so frustrating. At least you're not on your own.
@@JenniferBrick thanks so true but he's planning to retire in a year or 2 or 3 or really soon if the tattling bs continues. It's easy to see golden boy wants to be Mgr. Sigh. What a ride I just got on. Time for me to move on. The business greatly improved with us over the last year and this is what we get in return
Golden Boy ends up one of two places: in power because he appealed to the narcissist and now the narcissist think Golden Boy will carry out his legacy. Or, Golden Boy makes a mismove and subtly puts the narcissist legacy at risk. He doesn't want someone who will fill his shoes, he wants someone to take over who will pale in comparison (none of this is based on reality or facts, just the narcissist feels).
For your sake I hope it's the latter and not the former.
@@JenniferBrick Wow I've learned so much from you because I'm thinking of the same two endings. Thank you so much for confirming
I was hired and asked to start next day. Manager left me alone after 2 hours to figure out things on my own. It was a daycare. I had six kids to look after. Fun times.
I admire you. I’m a construction engineer and I can say that I can’t do your job.
The “like family” one is worse. My boss brought his personal drama to peoples’ houses but wanted us to respond “professionally”
Wow, this video is a goldmine of insights on the evolving work week! A four-day work week? Woohoo!
Hi Jennifer, you are reading my mind when you talked on 3:00 part, I’ve identified red flags everywhere and people on revolving door, Whats your advice? I can’t leave , it pays great in the largest company on earth but the management is toxic and incompetent😢
8:37 Yep! Weekend emails.
The office was closed weekends and holidays🤔
I worked at one place where my co-workers socialized together... but they didn't invite me 😢
You’re loved! Ignore them. It says everything about them and boo about you. Happened to me too
Sometimes it’s a good thing that coworkers don’t invite you out to things. Typically the outgoing ones will probably roofie your drink or set you up for failure for them to gossip about. I know being lonely sucks but it’s better than being with assholes at least
Works for me.
Thank you very much for this video! It was very helpful! Have a great day!
....
This is sounding more and more like the military, I'm so glad I found this. I thought I was going crazy
7:26 Yep!
The revolving door 🚪 and
The turnover like the grocery store turnstile!
5:22 Smh 🤦🏽♀️
That too!
Self onboarding 😮
no clear direction or leadership at all.
That should have been my clue aside from the unfriendliness during the initial interview process.
1:54 OH MY GOODNESS you just literally described my former workplace 😂
I'm listening to this and the signs tick. I had been in a toxic place. Big time toxic. Bad thing I learned that the hard way 😢
By the gods, I wish I had seen this video years ago.
I wish someone had made this video for me to watch years ago!!
@@JenniferBrick 😂😂😂❤️❤️
About 15 years ago!
1:09 omg this is so important. I was dealing with emeshment in my last job. I felt obligated to stay and also the treatment felt like the little sibling that you pile all the grunt work on and these older employees just do whatever they want. They keep secrets and also not take any responsibility for their mistakes. It was hard to talk to them even though I tried on multiple occasions, it felt fruitless since they would just keep me in the dark. I’m so glad I finally left and well I would suggest: LEAVE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE AND DONT ASK FOR PERMISSION!
Toxic jobs don’t care about you.
I don’t become friends with my coworkers at all especially those of the opposite gender since I value my job and need to pay my bills.
Another huge red flag is when you talk about the work you're doing outside the office - maybe to someone in another company or maybe at a conference, and people are visibly impressed. Then you go back to your office and you feel barely adequate and barely tolerated, despite the fact that your coworkers do a fraction of what you do. You can conclude here that you've already proven your worth but that your workplace refuses to recognize it.
To be honest, there is some level of toxicity in any workplace. There is always something to feel pissed off about.
The thing is we ourselves should not be a part of this cycle. If any bad behavior is happening, we should not contribute to that.
Just stay respectful and professional and the rest will be OK.
"Hit the ground running. "
OMG! I can’t stop laughing!!!This is SO on point with experiences that I have had that I want to know where you have your camera and mic hidden 😂 Why is this so common?
Humans love to think they're unique and special - but they're not. The toxic people that create toxic work environments are generally traumatized, reactive, and as a result are predictable AF.
@@JenniferBrickand power hungry! That’s a high many don’t want to give up… perpetuating the toxic environment.
Impulsive power grabbing is in itself a trauma response IMHO. Most empire builders I have encountered have a raging lack of worthiness they're trying to placid with position (they think 'if I am important, I'll feel important' - it doesn't work and leads to all sorts of nastiness because that feeling of being unworthy gets worse as they acquire power).
I need to do a documentary on my old jobs that were toxic workplaces
Watch out for leadership that wants to keep the company growing - no matter what. When things change in the economy, the stress to produce gets crazy high.
Wow, I am a programmer, and when you mentioned that you aren't so good at "Attention to Detail," I feel that. I've had meeting where I was blamed for a word that should have been captialized and wasn't on a website that was still in development. The text was sent to me via email and was cut and pasted in the editor, and the word wasn't capitialized in the email and I missed it.
Later, I was in another meeting where I capitialized the same work on the same website, and was called into a meeting where I was blamed for chaning the text I was send. That place was toxic af; and I no longer work there.
I made the mistake texting “PERIODT ❤” in my work group chat. I’m so embarrassed
I even apologized, I mistaken the text to my personal friends group chat, I’m now freaking out and scared I’m literally gonna be isolated or lose my job because it seems, I’m not fitting in. It’s like high school all over again
When I think back to work places that I should’ve left sooner, the first one that comes to mind is the one where my coworker who was supposed to be training me was telling me about her abusive, ex-boyfriend and how she’s a Wiccan. She ended up framing me for all of her mistakes, which I didn’t find out about till later. nearly destroyed my self-esteem. Bad workplace
Red flag, when you are a contractor, and your management tells you you’re considered family with the client you are working for, they are lying. GTFOT.
Jennifer, you're a brilliant, charming beautiful woman. I learned a lot watching your funny, creative and very thoughtful videos. I am in a job where a cobra would quit.. I sent out my updated resumé to a company I wanted to work at. I did a deep dive and recently obtained an interview. With your tips I aced the interview and today they called to announce that they were happy to hire me.. So.. That's your impact ❤.. Please continue. You're a gem 💎 🙏
Congrats on your new job!
Thank you :-) . I'm in the salary negotiation phase right now. I plan on making the most of it. It's always nice to be wanted ;-) @@JenniferBrick
My former project had a bunch of turnover, gossiping and people trying to meet up at 6pm on a Friday after work to drink. The kicker was an underqualified female boss who got her position through years of sitting in meetings.
My boss just called, it was one of the "performance issue" call and this is what he said " you take this job like a 9-5" he said it like its a bad thing. Bro he was paying me intern wages,and expecting to work like i own the product and its profits. Idc i quit ,even the best performing employee told me that the work culture is toxic especially.
0:45 this is called enmeshment. It’s not healthy at the workplace nor your family.
Edit: Ha! A few moments later you talk about enmeshment. Spot on.
I love that you knew EXACTLY what it was from what I described!
I don’t even get a lunch break. I tried to hide in the break room to just eat and they tracked me down.
The managers are sadistic.
2:44 Hahah SAME
5:30 Im 4 years into my first job and I had this experience. It was unbelievably overwhelming BUT I now love it. Top management: Completely incompetent & knows nothing about the business, facility, or general operations. I am a self starter, Im lazy, and I get bored easily. I learn a task (managing inventory, invoice, requisitioning, service ticket system, tool training, federal cost accounting, software development, facility safety, internship program management, legal compliance), I automate it because Im lazy, I get a new task because Im bored
Since upper management is so tuned out they don't care about things like "job description", "responsibilities", or "hours". I come in and leave whenever I want. I takeover anything that interests me. I get 15% promotions per year because when someone leaves they don't get replaced (because I have already replaced their function).
I average 13 hours a week and am well positioned to take over a 800 user clean room facility at 28. I got very lucky. My weird personality made me perfectly suited for this toxic job
I had someone tell me that I was an accident looking for a place to happen. I said “other people have accidents too.” They said “we’re not talking about other people. We are talking about you!” 😮
Saw all the signs from the very beginning. I should have left earlier. Now I am left with a very deteriorating mental health.
While there wasn't much to do at my last job, basically guarding an empty building, that didn't mean there weren't things to do. Guess who reported most of the building issues? And guess who left? If that building falls apart, not my issue because there's 6 other people throughout the day to notice things.
At this point I think there needs to be an entirely different system in place with management. I feel as if they shouldn't be in charge of your payroll, schedules, or your chance of promotion because all 3 of those can always be toyed with whenever they feel like retaliating or if they simply just don't like you. It just gives them too much power and an advantage point over you. I was literally quiet fired because I had a store manager who personally didn't like me at work and yet I have not gave her any reason to. I worked 11-12 hour shifts and pulled my weight with no call offs and yet she cut my hours down to 17 a week, demoted me and clocked everything I did on the job. I eventually became mentally drained from dealing with that and just left. Thankfully I have people in my life to fall back on because the job market is harsh right now
I didnt know i worked one day and after an hour when my shift started i came in, was screamed at by my meth head manager while the big boss stood there silently.
Literally the next week my manager didn't show to her shift for 5 hours and the big boss was telling us how because she was late that her dog was probably going to die since she had to stay and couldn't give it their meds.
The manager comes in and after a casual apology and buddy buddy talk, the big biss just laughed and said it was fine.. wtf
Where I use to work the AVPs and managers VACATIONED together and POSTED it on FACEBOOK! This a Fortune 100 company.
OMG...the expectation to "OWN your own on-boarding and training" that is SOOO how it is...I'm actually triggered
What’s interesting to me is that some of these toxic workplace signs were almost praised or at least tolerated as being a fact of life not too long ago. Don’t get me wrong; I’m glad this shit is getting called out and is not as tolerated or promoted.
Only 5-10 years ago I would come across articles about the need to keep answering emails while on vacation. Answering emails from some exotic location isn’t a vacation to me.
Or the one about an absence of onboarding. I remember one of my bosses from years ago who was considered successful. She owned the company, which was a small company. She recalled in her first office job, probably back in the early ‘80s, she arrived at work to nothing but an empty desk. She said her boss wanted to test how resourceful she was. She said this with a reverent tone like she super respected this boss. I’m thinking, “Why should she waste time tracking down basic office supplies on her first day?” I also seem to recall this boss was exceptionally good at onboarding, compared to other places I worked.
I’ve always worked for small companies and the only onboarding I expected was one of my co-workers showing me the basics of my job and packets on how to enroll in the benefits package.
Jennifer, I’m wondering if you could weigh in on my situation. I feel that at my current company there is no passion or drive to wake up and come to work and it’s toxic but I make good money. I have an opportunity to switch to a career I know I love but it would be for a (still live-able) pay cut. As of now, I am working part time at the job I love, full time at the job i dislike. Should I just stay where I am to make $$ although feeling miserable daily, or make the jump to potentially a more happy, calm lifestyle?
I can't answer that for you, this is something you have to figure out for yourself. I'd ask you this to help you clarify though: What's most important to you right now? Making money, work life balance, mental health, family, etc. Everything is important, but stack rank them - and under no circumstance should you judge or shame yourself for your answers. They're just answers. Based on that, you'll probably have clarity, but from what you describe you'll be sacrificing something for the other thing. To give yourself confidence in the direction, why is it worth it? what do you GAIN (short and long term) by taking that path.
I think you should look for another job from home and when you get the offer immediately leave the current company without any notice
@@JenniferBrick Thanks so much for the response! I really appreciate that outlook, it puts things into perspective better for me because I feel like I didn’t really know the right way to approach my decision. You’re awesome for helping others on their journeys! 😊
It’s a dream job but some dreams are nightmares. 😮
Prefect timing. And thanks for the terms of reference that I shall be using ad nauseum for the next few months. I am so traumatized by my promotion. that I am now I am embodying the subtle art of not giving a f@#$. It's a job, that buys tampons. That's it, it's not that deep.
Thank you! The mistake thing happened to me! As a NEW HIRE! She threatened to put me on a plan. Fine. Fire me and spend another year interviewing and training someone new! Lololol
How you know beforehand if the company is toxic?
If you are the only person waiting to get interviewed (in waiting area). If they tell you we're a family lol, if they tell you you're amazing incredible (I'm sure you are). If they accept answers that aren't relevant to the post. If it's a customer service type role and you have access to releasing money ie loans insurance mortgage social security etc. If they offer performance related bonuses which the entire department must meet (expect tension with your colleagues). Call center work is generally dreadful work lol I would avoid unless you are desperate. If they offer the same job post frequently (high turnover?). Also check job review sites like indeed and Glassdoor, also do you know anyone that works there? Ask them? Also what do your instincts tell you? If it feels too good to be true it probably is. I have more lol. Have a good day reader.
I worked for a company that bounced paychecks. My check bounced twice, so I quit. The company closed eventually.
You are your own hero.
Enmeshment. So there is a name for it. Its not in my head. Good
Not in your head. Very real (and very dangerous) dynamics are at play.
The project I was assigned at is very toxic. I work in separate team that assigns us to projects that need coverage, so lets say we are rented out there. I like the position itself, as my managers are fantastic people and I have been recognized as valuable employee with on-point opinions. Buuut the project itself ? Calling me in on Teams with no context to just ask aggressive questions about stuff I said 3 months ago... or why i didnt answer one query on the chat.. I was not onboarded at all. they expected me to gather everything myself from day 1 ! they expected me to redo all the documentation dating 3 years back, although they do not understand the documentation themselves. I wanted to be transferred but they have no one new to cover it, as my original team is understaffed.