Louis Cares For A Dementia Sufferer - Louis Theroux: Extreme Love - Dementia - BBC
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- Опубликовано: 15 авг 2016
- Louis has his hands full as he takes over the role as carer for the day.
Taken From Louis Theroux: Extreme Love - Dementia
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To those interested in hearing an update, Nancy passed away from dementia-related complications shortly after the documentary was filmed in 2012, aged 90, and John is currently still alive at the age of 96.
That's sad but also amazing. What a special couple and so much respect for him.
Thank you. God bless
Blaze
Thank you for the update.
@batesyboyo 😂 🛒you a troll.
Pretty funny tho
John was an absolute inspiration and a total rock star.
“Nancy, take care of Louis while I’m away for a second or two okay?”
“Certainly”
Favourite moment.
you catched it
ofcourse
Nancy was prepared to take total care of Louis...
I loved this
I once was working in a care home as a care assistant. Both myself and the activities coordinator planned a resident with fairly advanced dementia a party. It took us WEEKS!
We spent almost two days setting it up.
Day of her party I came in early - unpair, to be the one to get her up and ready. I washed her hair, gave her a lovely bath, put on one of her traditional dresses (which I had to google cos I had no idea how to) and treated her like the actual queen she is. I’d roped the chef into ordering all her favrioute traditional foods. We had a mad party most of the day for her, laughing dancing and singing with all her favrioute songs. Towards the end of the day (is stayed way after when my shift was meant to finish) both me and the activities coordinator went over to say goodbye to her, and in a moment of inspiration I said to her “thank you so much for inviting me to your party” and she said “ohhh that’s no trouble, you must call me sometime and we’ll go out for lunch”.
I’ve never loved ANYONE as much as I loved that lady who had, straight up, no idea who I am
@@josie5670 you’re truly an angel. Bless you for your kindness, you sound like a wonderful and hard working, caring person
I truly respect anyone who takes care of a loved one, full time, who suffers from dementia.
Luke Cooke мy grandмoтнer нaѕ deмenтιa and мy grandғaтнer тooĸ care oғ нer ғυll тιмe and мy мoтнer нelped нιм oυт. мy υтмoѕт reѕpecт ғor тнeм deeply. ι ғeel ѕorry ғor тнιѕ мan, нe'ѕ ѕтrong. ι wιѕн нιѕ cнιldren can нelp нιм oυт and gιve нιм тнaт вreaĸѕ нe мay needed jυѕт lιĸe ιn тнιѕ vιdeo.
Yeah, especially sons and daughters who want their inheritance..lol
John Smith noт alwayѕ lιĸe тнaт. yoυ'd вe ѕυrprιѕe тнaт мoѕт cнιldren do genυιnely love тнeιr parenтѕ.
Luke Cooke thank you.
John Smith Nobody could experience this; second or third hand and look toward an inheritance. Trust me.
My grandfather had dementia, but luckily he only lived about 30 houses down so we could take care of him in his last few years, and one day in particular had upset me, he had snapped his key in the door and was panicking outside his house, so a neighbour ran down and got me, I went down and he didn't recognise who I was, so I said I was a friend of his daughter and I'd take him home, and all the way he was talking about my mother and myself, but didn't realise I was the one he was talking about and was saying really lovely things about me, made me get a lump in my throat realising he loved me and thought highly of me but couldn't recognise my face
I'm sorry to hear that this upset you however at least you know he loved you dearly
That is very nice, I'm sorry you had to go through that, I miss my father
thats beautiful
i got a lump in my throat just reading this. what a wonderful man
Got the same feeling when my grandmother suddenly started speaking to me about some girl I used to date and play tennis with. I don't play tennis, took her a while to realize I wasn't my dad and we weren't in 1976. She didn't show signs of dementia before that, so it came as a suprise.
It's hard to see such vulnerability from people you probably looked up to your whole life. Makes you think about your own life and what is going to come.
Louis is really good with her. I have a little experience in a care home and he's doing it just right. The logical answer when says "norse" is "what??" but he's says "Yes! Nice and comfortable!" When she seems to be rejecting going for a walk, for unclear reasons, he doesn't engage that but instead is friendly: "Take my hand! :)"
Speaking with people with dementia is an art.
What's really interesting is that she knows "norse" is not the word she wanted.
The way Louis treats her btw is perfect, if u treat someone with dementia like a patient it does not work, u just need to get on their level and play along with them
Great advice! 👍
I was taught in nursing school many years ago to re-orient the patients every single time. I quit doing that because they just became agitated. So we had good conversations and a lot of joy.
Imagine if the love of your life was slowly going crazy day by day and all you could do was watch. I have nothing but respect for that man.
don't call them crazy please thats very disrespectful...
Sean there not ‘crazy’ or ‘mad’ it’s a form of mental health... I’ve been doing this job for 9 years...my nan also has it...it’s very sad but nothing can be done
It’s just a job...sometimes it gets to me other times you have to switch yourself off from it x
Sean Strauss my biggest fear :'/
at least I had a love at some point
I have a lot of respect for Louis, he asks the questions no one else wants to and does not sugar coat his opinions and views. He also isn’t afraid to get stuck and really connect with the people he interviews, the world needs more journalists like him.
I agree, and you may also want to check out his father's work, one of the most respected travel authors of his generation... Paul Theroux.
Absolutely, I think he knows how to act in certain circumstances too. He puts on an act of naiveity with the far right extremists etc but shows empathy when with the people with mental illnesses.
James Colman I love louis :)
Nancy was so cute throughout the whole documentary. And her husband was a gem too.
"I have no one else to kiss" AW that is so sad....
There s something so genuine about Loui that steals your heart and brings you so close to the people he films. He is such an intelligent guy and yet he is not cynical. This is really great filming.
He was a troll when he was younger though. He certainly became more friendly and upright in the 2010's and has remained so.
@@babblingalong7689 That's a bit harsh on Louis - cheeky maybe but not a troll
44,000 pounds a year schooling helps in making a show watchable
@@StratsRUs When the OP said Louis is not cynical, he was referring to you.
Louis is a lovely human being
awh louis is cute. he was so brilliant with this lady. so gorgeous to watch.
This is so deeply moving. Louis is so big, tall, young and sharp and Nancy is like a very old child. Frail, vulnerable and lost. The contrast of a young guy giving a voice to Nancy, breaks your heart.
Such a horrific disease, truly demonstrates that nobody is safe from the deterioration of the brain.
we are getting better at fighting it. when my grandmother had died there was nothing they could do for her not even 5 years later they are now starting to be able to take the fight to it finally.
Snappera except… she’s a super old lady… that would have made more sense if this was a young or middle aged woman, but it’s not.
Practice vipassana. Look it up.
The way she held his hand and laid her head on his shoulder...goodness gracious ♥️ so sweet
Louis is honestly one of my favourite docu makers.
He's a proper gentleman who disarms the subjects of his documentaries with effortless charm and quiet tenacity.
i looked after my mum for over a year,, and i must admit,, as much as i loved my mother,, it was the hardest year of my life, ,both emotionally and physically,, i took a day and a half off, each week (where my sis looked after her, ,, she had kids i didnt) and by that time i was DRAINED,, also had feelings of regret ,, when i looked back at the week,, she died ,, and i thanked God she never had to suffer anymore, ,but saying all that ,, "i would do it ALL AGAIN " as i loved my mum :)
I looked after my grandmother and after 4 years I couldn't do it anymore.I would never recommend anybody of becoming a caregiver, you will lose your life, become damaged yourself and others will not understand what you are going through.
Totally agree, it's the hardest job in the world but as hard as it was I look back with fondness of all the time I got to spend with my mother before she died.... And I'd do it again in a heartbeat. God bless all the care givers out there.
when my body packs in , i'll off myself
@@partyinthecookiejar I looked after my mum for quite a few years, she had carers coming in too. It was a relief when she died and to be honest I don't know if I could do it again. The carers were wonderful. how they do that job I will never know. They have my utmost respect and truly deserve to be in the high wage bracket !
"Well, I have nobody else here to kiss". Oh, I see what you did there, lady. Still smooth.
MsLalaUsagi mhmm, she wanted a lil Louis smooch lol
@@Elbarto150 not funny. she forgot her husband was right there
if I had dementia I'd want Louis too look after me he really is a lovely man
Louis actually bossed this. There’s so many times here I just wouldn’t know what to say or do.
I feel like this is one of those rare examples of investigative/interactive journalism that both: shows insight into a very personal and sad situation, yet does not manipulate or expose the subjects purely for entertainment. It's really effective and informative seeing this.
She seemed a lovely, humorous, spirited lady. Dementia is damn cruel
If everyone in this world was like Louis there would be no wars.
God this reminds me of my grandma. The stuff she would say and silly things she did used to make me laugh so hard. Even when she forgot who I was most of the time, we had fun together.
My uncle in England had it. He couldn't remember anybody. My dad who he hadn't seen for over 20 years visited England and when dad walked in his room it was " Hi Bill. How are you". Everybody was amazed. Although sadly he he still couldn't remember his family or regular visitors
binaway dementia sufferers have better long term memory than short term
alzheimer's seams to hit more recent memories and leaves old memories alone or more so obviously its different in everyone. my grandmother could not form very good new memories but man she could tell me every last detail of her life as a 20 year old and i confirmed it with her brother my dad and my aunt so yeah. the one thing she ever did that weirded me out was thinking i was her dead husband and getting pissed at me when i would not get in bed with her to go to sleep. was like uhhhh grandma im your grandson not bill.
I love the way she says "Cheers" at the end, with a perfect British accent.
watching my grandma go through the different stages of Alzheimer's and my grandpa die at the same time of lung disease over the years has truly scarred me. I watched her 12 hours a day for 4 years until she had to be put in a home but I feel like I took those years where she could talk and interact for granted. long story short, if you have a family member or friend with Alzheimer's I beg you to cherish the early years and while they still know u. when I knew my grandma didn't really know who i was anymore it broke my heart.
I'm obviously a very late response, and in all honesty writing this more for myself, but I was the ONLY family member my grandmother recognised, right up to two days before her death. I spoke to her via video call and I started to cry because she couldn't open her eyes anymore and was so frail. She told me they we will always be connected (something we used to say when life got in the way of visits and phone calls.) The guilt I feel over not being able to fly down to her in those last days is immeasurable. The point being, it's also painful being remembered, especially when you weren't able to give all you wanted to in the end...
God bless him for saying “ yes” when she asked “is that right?” At the end of that clip.
I think her way she was right. They came in out of the sun and she said it was Norse. She was probably searching her brain for a word that conveyed cold or being cooler.
@@alaskaguyd963 I had the exact same thought! Shame louis didn't catch it!
1:40 THE HAND HOLDING AND HEAD ON THE SHOULDER, I DIED! 😭❤️😭
She is my dad. It's very sad to see dad disappear. Lucky mums love is so strong....
Excellent work Mr Theroux. You were kind to her and respected her and she maintained her dignity. I'm an R.N. with 33 years of experience and I don't think I could have done it better. Lovely people to work with, too.
He swept up the glass. What a gentleman.
really, was he going to insist on a lady with dementia cleaning it up or her elderly husband. 🙄
3:13 "I don't know how many... *whatevers* "
Louis makes best documentaries ever. I've watched some of his documentaries at least 34 times.
My mum is a carer. She's only been doing it for a few months, but the number of stories she already has is unbelievable. I wish I were strong enough to do that job.
0:35 i thought he spanked her lol
plus no-one would ever believe her
LOL
He did. He spanked that ass
lmfao!
Haha, #MeToo
Both of my grandmothers have dementia, and both are on the opposite ‘ends of that stick’. One is experiencing mindless bliss and is quite content in her bubble, the other had a horrific experience, becoming terrified of every little facet of her existence. She passed away last year.
Heart goes out to John ❤️
Very interesting! 😮I’m glad that not everyone has a bad experience, but it’s a real shame for your grandmother who did. 😞 I’m glad she doesn’t have to suffer with it anymore though. I wonder if the different experiences are because people react and experience and feel differently per usual or if it’s because the actual dementia itself progresses in a different way between individuals.
Louis is such a decent guy. I know its his job but you can see a mile away how much he cares, and isn't afraid to ask the right questions. Hope for a new series soon. 😎🤘👍
This is incredible. A truly frightening, heartbreaking but also heartwarming demonstration of dementia and the struggle of how to cope with someone who has it.
How heartbreaking and touching. I can't imagine how hard it must be to care for someone with dementia.
Especially when it’s someone you love, if my partner every became this way it’s break my heart but I think people develop a certain strength to go through something like that. God forbid I ever end up this way I hope to god that I pass relatively intact.
She seems like the sweetest lady, I feel so sorry for her :(
I love that lady's attitude 😂😂kissing that ball
Heartbreaking to watch a loved one through dementia. I lost my gran after almost two decades after her diagnosis and it's very difficult. People don't understand unless they've experienced it too.
"You did it!"
"Of couurse!"
I've spent my life so far caring for people with dementia. Its very mentally demanding and requires a special person to take care of very special people.
What does it mean when the person has hallucinations about you when you're not there. ?
Why do they think people are swearing at them when they're not. ?
Do they still care about you even when they say they don't. ?
Is there any point in socialising with them when they don't know remember or like you. ?
Sorry my nana has this so I'm curious to learn as much as possible to Be able to separate her from her illness.
These two have my whole heart! All of my grandparents and great grandparents as well as my husband's Grandparents were all married 60 plus years and Incredibly devoted to each other just like this. I truly hope and pray for future Generations that they are able to see such phenomenal examples of unconditional love. When 50% of marriage end in divorce and broken homes it is easy to feel hopeless for them. This is the best example we can show for the grace that God gives us in himself and each other.
My grandma in law has severe dementia and it has been a downwardly spiral even before I met my husband. She sorta remembers me,but just as his gf. Not his wife. The most amazing thing about her experience in her last remaining decade (she is 91,92 next spring) is that she can play the piano without music like it never went away from her. It is the one remaining thing that she holds strong with and is amazing at. You sit her in front of a piano and she becomes very cognitive. I love her for that. She is truly a legend Mrs. Emily. NOT to mention,she is still hilarious after all this time.
I’m a support worker for families who have a loved one with dementia, and can honestly say it’s such a complex and challenging condition,band affects everyone differently depending on their personality. If there’s live, there’s hope! Lovely wee couple.
Well done with your work. I am sure you are loved and appreciated.
awww louis is a gent
💯❤
This episode is the hardest to watch. This scene is so touching.
That husband is every bit as amazing his wonderful wife.
When I watched this years ago it made me cry.
This is both sweet and heartbreaking at the same time. Love you Louis))
Awwww, Louis is such a kind man.
That man is brave. Looking after the love of his life like that. Wow
You can see what a sweet lady she was.
Louis is so adorable
Its a cruel twist of fate she's lost so much and he's so switched on and with it, what a beautiful couple, she reminds me of my nan when she developed vascular dementia, she was always very funny and witty and great in the moment, that a lot of carers missed she was slipping because she was so good at improvising or redirecting when she was confused. But at her core, a beautiful lady that was lovely to everyone, kind of went more to the core of who she is. I miss her so much and this documentary made me cry my eyes out the first time I watched it, life can be so cruel
My grandma suffers from dementia and as it get progressively worse you can slowly see things falling away. One of the most heartbreaking things though is her self awareness, she forgets words or routines and is visibly embarrassed, this lady with Louis though is just saying what she likes with no shame it’s really beautiful! ❤️❤️
Even for such a short time thank you beyond words for looking after that woman
I love when she says of course in an English accent. So sweet though. Love all Louis theroux documentaries
Louis is one of the best people In the world. Kindness exudes from him in every way.
Nicest guy on the planet.
This is so sweet, i grew up with my grandpa and grandma, and when he passed away my grandma fell into a deep dementia the same day he died, it was too much for her to handle.
I had to quit my job at 22 years old and care for her for about a year before i could get her into a home. And that was the hardest part, letting go of her, it felt like it was my duty to care for her the way she cared for me. But at that young age i had to focus alitle bit on myself since all our bills where already late because of the lack of work. I truely feel the pain this man has for his wife. Its like looking at your loved one, but talking to another. You still love that person just as much, possibly even more. Too all people having to suffer because of dementia, you are not alone.
Aw, she's so adorable
Louis is an absolute sweetheart. I bet he's a wonderful father.
We’re having to cope with the early symptoms in an elderly family member and it is very hard.
Its so scary because at times i see a moment in her eyes that she knows something isnt right...gosh it makes me stressed
So sweet when they held hands sitting on the sofa
Watching this makes appreciate that both my grandparents died young enough to still remember me 😔
Louis is a national treasure. Give him his damn knighthood, Queenie!!
If Louis is not knighted in the next few years I'll have absolutely zero faith left in humanity.
Yeah I love Louis ❤
He doesn't need a knighthood. He's already a god.
Couldn't help but laugh when Louis asked the husband about things that might redirect Nancy to a more positive place and the husband responded with "your the improvisation man, improvise".
That old man is a saint. I took care of my precious father for 2 years. He had dementia and it was so sad
IVE ALWAYS maintained a high respect for you Louis, your are considerate, kind, and gentle to all people your projects. Good Kudos to you always Louis. Be very well... rob
I'm a big fan of all of his shows.
What an absolutely lovely couple! She is so beautiful.
When I saw the photo of them from their younger days I was so sad for them,they looked so young and hopeful for their future together dreams of a life that laid ahead and now one of them doesn't even know who she is.you can tell that they both still love each other an awful lot though
Why sad for the past though? She didn’t (as far as I know) get dementia when they got married or started a family or bought their house. She got to live that live! Agreed completely that it is terribly sad that now maybe she’s forgotten some/all, but I’m sure he hasn’t. And I would guess he’d never want to go back and do it differently because, you’re so right, look at the love there!
so much life left in her!
this is so sad.. my grandpa has to care for my grandmother as she's got dementia and her memory is absolutely terrible.. and he's 3 years older than her, I cant imagine how tough it is for him
Aww when he held her hand
This woman is such a lovely person and Louis is brilliant with her.
Louis has always had a good moral compass and quietly, softly tried to show the error in the thinking of people in all walks of life about issues of the day!! If more human beings thought and acted like Louis; wars would be rare and people might actually concentrate on improving themselves and what they "brought to the table" however large or small matters nil and we'd have a quiet planet of worker bees accomplishing tasks great or small without minding the business of others!!
My heart is breaking in two 😢
God bless anyone who deals with this kind of problem ❤
I Remember Watching This And THIS Man Was LOVE. He stuck by his commitments
Honestly dementia is one of the scariest things to me. I detest being floated to the dementia unit where I work because it's so difficult to handle that kind of patient. I have nothing but respect for my colleagues who can.
Beautiful.
so beautiful he takes care of her. thats still his sweetheart
I lost my best most wonderful Aunty to this, just exactly one year ago I miss her so much x
This woman is such a sweetheart
I hope one day that we're able to chose when we want to end our lives peacefully. Love is about letting go knowing that you've said and done things you always wanted to achieve.
"Improvise" I'm in tears.
louis theroux nd anthony bordain. two of the greatest men of our time.
Yep, it is tedious and mentally draining and mildly torturous, and day after day you feel like your soul is screaming and you’re losing parts of yourself along with them.
If you are caring for someone with dementia, please make every day as happy as possible. It really doesn't take much. You can tell the same jokes and provide the same experiences over and over and each time it's like new joy for the "sufferer". Hard to explain, but never feel awkward, because they dont.
John is such a good human
Without our memories, we're nothing.
Aww she's adorable!
The lady has/had such a nice personality.
John is an absolute gentleman.
Louis is such a sweet caring guy
Louis would make a great carer . He nice and understanding .