Now is the time to look outward and find ways to make other’s lives meaningful. Give to others responsibly. Serve others. Teach your kids to serve. You’ll find meaning.
I was talking to my daughter in law who is a lawyer in the Philippines. She said her brother had to drop out of law school because he couldn't afford it. I asked how much a semester cost. She said 9,000...Philippine pesos. That's roughly $159.00. There is a LOT a person can do if they look for opportunities to do so.
This is so true. I don’t have it all, but I have enough, and I know that God blesses me so I can bless others. In doing so I experience the greatest satisfaction and gratitude.
That would be Dave Ramsey's stock answer. He'd say relax and live and give like no one else. He tells people to plan how much to invest to get really wealthy, how much to give, and how much to spend on fun.
Giving to others is the greatest reward I've ever experienced. That and travel to interesting places that change your perception. Safari, remote places, different cultures away from American styled resorts. And be healthy
i broke down crying listening to the first couple minutes to this because i’m 38 and didn’t realize i had “arrived” in this same way he is explaining. i’m not rich by any means but i have a couple hundred thousand in retirement and several thousand in high yield savings. it feels like nothing or not enough but this is something to be grateful for. i grew up without lights and water because we couldn’t afford bills and food and now i don’t have to worry even if i need a new car. i am praying right now in gratitude for what i have
Esther Perel says it’s the quality of our relationships that determines the quality of our lives. With a wife & four kids, the guy can use his freedom to build such great bonds with all of them! And some new friends!
I WISH I had it all. Nothing in my life is going right . They can be grateful and enjoy it! Remember how much others are suffering and maybe go out and help those people.
A quote I heard one time said that, "The loneliest moment someone will ever experience is when they have achieved that which they thought would deliver the ultimate, but in the end it lets them down." Not saying that this person is "lonely" but I think it relates to feeling unmotivated when you achieved what you wanted and then you realize you don't know what is next.
Yes, and don’t f it up during this time. I lost my way being frozen after a family trauma. Had worked my whole, whole, life to let it all tumble. It’s absolutely heartbreaking, and terrifying to be here.
Now you get to actually LIVE, dude! Volunteer, adopt some old dogs, take the kids camping in the National Parks, buy and study a musical instrument, act in plays locally, do stand-up comedy, travel, go visit relatives, read ALL the books, learn to cook, grow a garden, literally the world is now your oyster. Enjoy
@@bernadette4567 I said "volunteer" that's however he interprets it, homeless, veterans, old people, kids, habitat for humanity, whatever floats his boat. All good.💪👍
My wife and I are in this position and last summer we came up with a fun way to anti-plan. We call it the flip trip. We've been trying to take a one or two day trip every month and here's how it works. We make up a rule for the day where we flip a coin to decide where to go next. For example, we could say "Only state highways, when we come to one we flip to turn or go straight. If it's turn, we flip for left or right." We then just see what we see and pick a hotel in late afternoon. We've stumbled into small town parades and festivals, state parks, scenic overviews, etc. We've been training our brains to believe good things can come spontaneously.
I’ve been in this dude’s situation now for a while. I could quit work for the next 15 years and be able to support myself. Yet I’m working as hard as I ever have. I’m as motivated as I’ve ever been. The reason is that my goals have changed. Instead of just trying to build financial security and save for retirement I’m trying to make my mark in my career. I want to look back and feel like I really did something special with my life. I now look at my time as much more valuable currency than dollars and cents. That’s what fuels me to get after it… watching the seconds tick by knowing I’ll never get them back. This guy just needs to think bigger. He needs to open up his mind to some possibilities that he never thought were possible in his past life. That will rekindle the fire and edge he had when he hustling to pay off debt. Life isn’t about paying off debt. He needs to look at himself like his life has now just started.
Very very well said! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽You just summarized the true purpose of life! I’m poor as dirt and still struggling because I had to stop working to care for my elderly parents. Of course I dream of paying off my student loan and buying a house someday, and having a car that I don’t have to pray will get me through another day lol but what I really hope, is to be able to get back to my the original calling. I was a Licensed Veterinary Technician, which is so fulfilling even though it doesn’t pay well. So I may never be debt-free, but leaving my mark, advancing within my profession and teaching the next generation how to provide the best medical care for all animals, I hope, will be my lasting legacy here.
After 5 LONG draining years, Saturday I received my degree. And man… it doesn’t even feel real. My husband has made take a break after and re-find my purpose instead of throwing myself into work again
Count every good thing and every blessing in your life. There are many people going through hard times. Just try to enjoy life, even the things that seem small.
This hits home. 28 with a 270k net worth coming from no financial literacy from family, first rental at 22, first primary at 26 (working to get it paid off), I don't need a fancy car as I am just fine with my 2002 Landcruiser, I've accomplished huge things, and I have everything I actually need. My mind runs in a perpetual "what now?" state and it drives me up the wall. Obviously the next step is a family, kids, and increase net worth, but how do I begin to appreciate and taken in what I've done without losing motivation and intensity with work as I am simply not wired to do so? Thanks for all you do Dr. John.
yep! you're way ahead of us, as we don't have any real estate BUT I have been debt free since like 25 and my husband and I debt free together since I was like 27 (other than mortgage). we didn't have kids until we were debt free, not on purpose really just worked out with the timing. SO yeah I've never really taken the time to stop and think about how much we've accomplished because bam now our life was all about our kids. we moved across the country, I quit my job, and a month in my husband's company laid him off. he was out of work for 8 months and we didn't struggle. I can't believe it looking back
@@KS_1995don’t take the foot off the gas. I’m 25. Worth 1.8 million. Currently dreaming of how to go bigger. Create generation wealth while living a non vanity life.
I've heard about this happening before. Do you have any hobbies? Passions to explore? Time to find out your interests if not. I could only wish to be in your shoes. I'd finally have time for my hobbies! And time to take better care of myself.
Caller reached a huge milestone. Congrats!! Hope to get there myself someday. Now they have the chance to take a breather, and then they can start to use their many blessings to be generous with others!
I am addicted to my own ambition, as it gives me motivation and fulfillment in life. I know that if I continue to succeed, at a certain point...I will have relied too much on ambition and feel empty afterward. I am glad someone called about this!
Wow! This is something I've been struggling with for years. Hubs had a clear vision, he was so confident and everything we worked so hard for has come to fruition. I'm so glad that I trusted him and let him lead the way. I'm now at the point that I'm letting the fear go, being happy and relaxed, spending time with friends and truly enjoying life. People, it's all worth it. It may not always be an easy ride but take it anyway.
Loved hearing this ❤ when I paid off my last 10,000 in debt (2019, I still have the canceled check !! ) have two years of security blanket put aside ., I just turned 65 and I have traveled to 13 countries in the last 3 years !! I lived like no one else , so I could "LIVE LIKE NO ONE ELSE " GOOD FOR YOU AND YOUR WIFE 💗💗
I felt that way after achieving such in school✅career ✅finances ✅travel . It’s okay not to have another goal, find hobbies and help others, because you are so blessed. I spent my entire life reaching goals. It’s freedom in not having a to do list.
Yes! When I walked across the stage with my doctorate it was like a great accomplishment, but then I thought Now what? Now I’m starting over in a greater field of research and service!❤
I thought it would feel different is coming from a place that outside accomplishments will fulfill the soul. It doesn't!! You have to find fulfillment from within!!
I think it’s the way our society is built (at least in the United States) that makes most people think this way. When we grow up and realize all of the accomplishments did not fill that void, we are lost & confused. This is the moment that our life really begins.
I’m in that season! Success and hollow! When you adopt the identity of “always challenge oneself and do hard things”. I love that, great advice and now I have the next set forward.
Happiness doesn't come from having things. It comes from being a part of things. Time to focus on what you want to do with this life. There are so many things that need doing and we need good people to do them.
Take some time to appreciate everything and get some hobbies but don’t make huge life changing decisions because you’re bored. At 28, I got the house, car and job along with a good chunk of the material things I wanted. 15 year old me never thought all of this possible. Last few months I’ve been feeling like caller. Now what, what’s the next big thing I should achieve. Life felt kinda boring, like I was supposed to do something more. It hit me one day that I’ve achieved things I worked a decade for, that my parents couldn’t their entire lives. For me, slowing down and appreciating everything was paramount. I haven’t bought more material things, using and enjoying what I have instead. I picked up a few new hobbies that even five years ago would have seemed ridiculous/impossible. Im spending more time with the people I love and on myself. I still get that annoying itch like I’m supposed to be doing something more but therapy is helping quiet that.
I had it all, at least I reached my goal. Got married, had kids and became a husband and father. Then things kind of fell apart from there. Kids moved out, wife wants a roommate so yeah.
@@landonlowe4029 Modern women don't like being wives (too traditional gender valued) Instead they want to be roommates where they get free room and board.
@@cashi4225 He may still be cheating. But if it is just no interest then you drew the rare guy. More common is my situation. Too bad people like us find people like them.
Life can be so tough that we don't always know how to plan for fun and spoiling ourselves a little. These may be small things, or really big ones: I could recently visit my son who now lives in a far-away country, and it was a wonderful experience I will cherish with gratitude for the rest of my life, especially because we both battled together when life was hard.
This is a great conversation. We all want to be where he is!!! But never thought this is how we could feel in the end. I am extremely happy, but we still have to work and we still have a lot to go. Thank you for this episode. It's an eye opening! Never thought achievement could feel this way!
He didn’t say he wasn’t happy, he just said he’d achieved all his goals and now didn’t know what else to do. Real happiness comes from knowing God and His plan for us in this one life we have been gifted. I hope he finds what His plan is, for to whom much is given much is also required.
@@rory644 he still didn’t say he wasn’t happy, in fact he seemed really happy, just looking for new goals to aim for, two entirely different things. I’m glad you’re happy, as am I, and I have no doubt without God you can still be happy, after all they do say ignorance is bliss. However for long lasting eternal happiness you will need God, whether you believe that or not is irrelevant. You are of course entitled to your opinion, but that won’t save you from the eternal punishment that awaits everyone who chooses to live without God and mock Him.
@@kelliemurphy7933So if Christ's followers do poor job of convincing non believers then those non believers go to hell forever for the crime of not stroking your god's ego enough? That almost sounds like imperfect humans creating a deity and then projecting their anger, pettiness, and ego on to it. Like, not everyone wants to be my friend and I don't punish them for it.😂
Solid advice about the journal. I would add to take a calculated risk in something you are interested and passionate in. Keep up the good work men and women!
I feel like this happens a lot with artists who pay dues for years and luck into celebrity overnight. This is why they are so ripe to be picked by abusive spouses, cults, etc.
This is where I’m at. And it is scary. I’m about to go back to school 😂 I’ve been being assertive with trying to make friends etc…. But this is what I needed to hear.
I would go back to school and spend the rest of my life learning, maybe start with something less incremental like take up a painting class or something, maybe don't start with a calculus course. Or learn a new hobby from a hired professional, it is gong to be cheaper and probably more meaningful to self study and hire a private tutor then give a college tuition money. Both husband and wife can learn a new skill together. That sounds like a wonderful next few years in my book.
Most honest question coming from success..spending all of your time working to not worry having people in your life that's just there but you keep working like they don't exist just to exist and when you finally get to the finish line your all burned out and don't feel anything sooo what now ?👍
I don't know about you. But I am in the same situation, and it feels really good. Trust me. I don't need motivation, I just need places to visit, travel, and peace 😊
I have nothing but the love of my wife and family. I never achieved much career wise but sometimes we don’t have everything we want. Do we have what we need? Maybe?
This guy and his wife need to plan a holiday for a month, go somewhere special and different, somewhere you've never been! There's lots of the world to see! I did that after getting my Masters degree, I had the same feeling! But travelling reinspired me in life, there's lots to see and learn. Life is about the experience.
The only reason we do anything in life is to feel a certain way. No matter what the hell it is. It’s time more of us live for our truth and serve others to the highest good and stop working to survive with little cash. The money will flow when you flow when you’re in alignment with your truth. ❤ We’ve been taught our entire life your worth comes from what you do. It’s not true. So when we are like this guy a sort of shame comes with that kind of success and not sure where’s to go. You are all worthy without action. Follow your heart and create your life from authenticity not chasing worth outside of you. ❤
I’m in the same boat. This guy will start to learn that money means a lot less than he thinks it does, hopefully he pursues relationships with good people, and the life of service to others. I know it sounds corny, but there is no high greater than impacting someone else’s life in a positive way
he’s rEally putting a solution to the problem.. this goal was idealized and they attached a feeling TO this goal. NOW what feeling will we bring to this life!!
What an odd problem to have.... You did all the things you had to do to have peace. Enjoy your peace now! Live, have fun, travel, enjoy life. When I worked towards being debt free I didn't expect fireworks with my last payment. Such and odd expectation to have. Be happy that you did it and now find meaning in things other than working your ass off.
@@ZukoTheShinigamisad when people are envious of people that are clearly not happy. Nobody needs to covet their neighbor cause nothing satisfies the soul besides Jesus. You don’t need to be toxic and talk trash. Turn to Christ and do better
Nah, I’ve heard humble brags and this wasn’t it. You can hear in his voice he’s a little lost. It’s kind of how we think “must be nice” when someone wins the lottery. A lot of people just do not know how to steward their blessings well. That’s why you have stories of rich kids that have had everything handed to them, living a life devoid of purpose and ending up dying of a drug overdose. The grass is not always greener on the other side.
Obviously this guy is lacking something in his life now he feels he has accomplished all his goals. He and his wife have worked their butts off to reach this level of success….and kudos to them. What is missing is a relationship with Jesus. Only He can complete you. God bless you .
This is what the so-called American dream can do. I hope the family looks outward and can serve others. Find passions, meaning and God and you’ll never be bored or stagnant.
I paid off mortgage my only debt and i felt numb, i had dreamed of it for so long,now im retired have had both knees placed last yrar and living my best life, except for wheny children were small, nothi g is better than that lol
What would it profit a man to gain the world and yet lost his soul, the Bible says. Make sure you are right with the Lord. I also “had it all.” The career, the family, and was about to get the house. But I knew I wasn’t right with God. I ran back to Him and the life I built became uprooted so I could follow Jesus fully. Again, make sure you are a born again Christian or else nothing else in the life will matter at the end
Exactly, the original human was created with the Holy Spirit of God. As a result of sin of Adam, we have inherited bodies without the God part. People will forever be incomplete without the Holy Spirit of God found in a relationship with Jesus.
It’s gotta be deeper than that, that’s like a guy getting to the NFL reaching his goal then losing all motivation. What happened is he thought he would feel like Superman, thought he would feel extraordinary and he still feels like the same ole guy. So now it’s blahhh
What if someone doesn’t share John Mayer’s sentiment? In terms of wanting to be the guy to call for anything? Then again he does have a family so I guess that’s the natural path for him to get on. Good luck to him and I think he should also remember to be grateful for the position he’s in so the blank slate would be less terrifying.
I don’t think the phd one is accurate unless it’s paid for. I graduated with a masters and felt Luke I’m about 1/3 of the way thru the slog…because student loans take at least twice as long…
The fact that u think u have it all is a problem...just goes to show we all have problems. U don't have it all, u lack humility. Even when u think u have it all...now u have the responsibility ot bless society, family and friends. That is a huge burden which u clearly do not feel and is a red flag in and of itself. I have no doubt life will humble you. The best teacher is life itself.
Get on your knees and thank God for your blessings and ask Him how can you serve Him. What a complaint. Feed the homeless. Volunteer with snow babies. Help the disabled.
I agree. When there is so much need in this world and this person has the God given ability, with God there is so much good that could be done. Let’s hope he chooses to turn to God and ask Him ‘what would you like me to do with all you have given me.’ For those who have been given much, much will be expected.
I paid off our house 6 years ago. Then I got cancer. I still have the house. Never take tomorrow for granted.
Hope you kicked cancers butt
Hope you’re beating it! Rooting for you! ✨
All the best!! Stay strong!! ❤
Cancer is gay, good luck man
❤❤❤
This is why PURPOSE is so important. It keeps your soul alive.
Now is the time to look outward and find ways to make other’s lives meaningful. Give to others responsibly. Serve others. Teach your kids to serve. You’ll find meaning.
I was talking to my daughter in law who is a lawyer in the Philippines. She said her brother had to drop out of law school because he couldn't afford it. I asked how much a semester cost. She said 9,000...Philippine pesos. That's roughly $159.00. There is a LOT a person can do if they look for opportunities to do so.
Well said
This is so true. I don’t have it all, but I have enough, and I know that God blesses me so I can bless others. In doing so I experience the greatest satisfaction and gratitude.
Amen!!!
My first thought reading the title; start giving back to others. Find something you’re passionate about and begin to serve others
That would be Dave Ramsey's stock answer. He'd say relax and live and give like no one else. He tells people to plan how much to invest to get really wealthy, how much to give, and how much to spend on fun.
Giving to others is the greatest reward I've ever experienced.
That and travel to interesting places that change your perception.
Safari, remote places, different cultures away from American styled resorts.
And be healthy
i broke down crying listening to the first couple minutes to this because i’m 38 and didn’t realize i had “arrived” in this same way he is explaining. i’m not rich by any means but i have a couple hundred thousand in retirement and several thousand in high yield savings. it feels like nothing or not enough but this is something to be grateful for. i grew up without lights and water because we couldn’t afford bills and food and now i don’t have to worry even if i need a new car. i am praying right now in gratitude for what i have
Congrats man keep it up hope you’re enjoying life!
Congratulations on your success, I’m sure your loved ones who have seen you grow are immensely proud of you.
Esther Perel says it’s the quality of our relationships that determines the quality of our lives. With a wife & four kids, the guy can use his freedom to build such great bonds with all of them!
And some new friends!
Right?! Men always think that it is not an accomplishment if it involved their families though so let them be miserable
I think you're right but I chuckled to myself when I thought "Four kids? Well you can spend a couple million sending them to school."
@@christopherenge4934 LOL well boarding school sounds like freedom to me 😂
I WISH I had it all. Nothing in my life is going right . They can be grateful and enjoy it! Remember how much others are suffering and maybe go out and help those people.
A quote I heard one time said that, "The loneliest moment someone will ever experience is when they have achieved that which they thought would deliver the ultimate, but in the end it lets them down." Not saying that this person is "lonely" but I think it relates to feeling unmotivated when you achieved what you wanted and then you realize you don't know what is next.
Yes, and don’t f it up during this time.
I lost my way being frozen after a family trauma.
Had worked my whole, whole, life to let it all tumble.
It’s absolutely heartbreaking, and terrifying to be here.
Now you get to actually LIVE, dude! Volunteer, adopt some old dogs, take the kids camping in the National Parks, buy and study a musical instrument, act in plays locally, do stand-up comedy, travel, go visit relatives, read ALL the books, learn to cook, grow a garden, literally the world is now your oyster. Enjoy
Dude! This is inspirational af. ❤
Amen!
Also, you could include helping the less fortunate. It feels just as amazing, if not more than, achieving one’s own goals ☺️
100%
@@bernadette4567 I said "volunteer" that's however he interprets it, homeless, veterans, old people, kids, habitat for humanity, whatever floats his boat. All good.💪👍
My wife and I are in this position and last summer we came up with a fun way to anti-plan. We call it the flip trip. We've been trying to take a one or two day trip every month and here's how it works. We make up a rule for the day where we flip a coin to decide where to go next. For example, we could say "Only state highways, when we come to one we flip to turn or go straight. If it's turn, we flip for left or right." We then just see what we see and pick a hotel in late afternoon. We've stumbled into small town parades and festivals, state parks, scenic overviews, etc. We've been training our brains to believe good things can come spontaneously.
I’ve been in this dude’s situation now for a while. I could quit work for the next 15 years and be able to support myself. Yet I’m working as hard as I ever have. I’m as motivated as I’ve ever been. The reason is that my goals have changed. Instead of just trying to build financial security and save for retirement I’m trying to make my mark in my career. I want to look back and feel like I really did something special with my life. I now look at my time as much more valuable currency than dollars and cents. That’s what fuels me to get after it… watching the seconds tick by knowing I’ll never get them back.
This guy just needs to think bigger. He needs to open up his mind to some possibilities that he never thought were possible in his past life. That will rekindle the fire and edge he had when he hustling to pay off debt. Life isn’t about paying off debt. He needs to look at himself like his life has now just started.
Very very well said! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽You just summarized the true purpose of life! I’m poor as dirt and still struggling because I had to stop working to care for my elderly parents. Of course I dream of paying off my student loan and buying a house someday, and having a car that I don’t have to pray will get me through another day lol but what I really hope, is to be able to get back to my the original calling. I was a Licensed Veterinary Technician, which is so fulfilling even though it doesn’t pay well. So I may never be debt-free, but leaving my mark, advancing within my profession and teaching the next generation how to provide the best medical care for all animals, I hope, will be my lasting legacy here.
I’m a physician early in my career, and this conversation resonated with me a lot. Thank you and your team for the work that you do.
After 5 LONG draining years, Saturday I received my degree. And man… it doesn’t even feel real. My husband has made take a break after and re-find my purpose instead of throwing myself into work again
Good for him, most of us are struggling to survive day to day.
Ha ha, that’s what I thought! Well, if anything, it should give us hope
Or depressed cause of no friends
Same here. Must be nice for him. I can only imagine.🙄🙄
Be grateful for what you have achieved...
Count every good thing and every blessing in your life. There are many people going through hard times. Just try to enjoy life, even the things that seem small.
Exactly.
This hits home. 28 with a 270k net worth coming from no financial literacy from family, first rental at 22, first primary at 26 (working to get it paid off), I don't need a fancy car as I am just fine with my 2002 Landcruiser, I've accomplished huge things, and I have everything I actually need. My mind runs in a perpetual "what now?" state and it drives me up the wall. Obviously the next step is a family, kids, and increase net worth, but how do I begin to appreciate and taken in what I've done without losing motivation and intensity with work as I am simply not wired to do so? Thanks for all you do Dr. John.
Go and volunteer in an animal shelter it will change your life in ways you cannot comprehend ❤
yep! you're way ahead of us, as we don't have any real estate BUT I have been debt free since like 25 and my husband and I debt free together since I was like 27 (other than mortgage). we didn't have kids until we were debt free, not on purpose really just worked out with the timing. SO yeah I've never really taken the time to stop and think about how much we've accomplished because bam now our life was all about our kids. we moved across the country, I quit my job, and a month in my husband's company laid him off. he was out of work for 8 months and we didn't struggle. I can't believe it looking back
@@debsday5445 thank you! I used to and got away from it with life being a little busy. Good reminder to get back to it. I appreciate it!
@@KS_1995don’t take the foot off the gas.
I’m 25. Worth 1.8 million. Currently dreaming of how to go bigger. Create generation wealth while living a non vanity life.
@@reubenr5237how did you do it?
I've heard about this happening before. Do you have any hobbies? Passions to explore? Time to find out your interests if not. I could only wish to be in your shoes. I'd finally have time for my hobbies! And time to take better care of myself.
Caller reached a huge milestone. Congrats!! Hope to get there myself someday.
Now they have the chance to take a breather, and then they can start to use their many blessings to be generous with others!
Practice gratitude and be of service to others.
He just needs to thank God for being so very good to him🙏
I am addicted to my own ambition, as it gives me motivation and fulfillment in life. I know that if I continue to succeed, at a certain point...I will have relied too much on ambition and feel empty afterward. I am glad someone called about this!
And now its time for the spiritual journey ❤️ and helping others
Congrats to you for your accomplishments!
Wow! This is something I've been struggling with for years. Hubs had a clear vision, he was so confident and everything we worked so hard for has come to fruition. I'm so glad that I trusted him and let him lead the way. I'm now at the point that I'm letting the fear go, being happy and relaxed, spending time with friends and truly enjoying life. People, it's all worth it. It may not always be an easy ride but take it anyway.
Being satisfied and fulfilled matters ❤
😊😮9
😮😮7🎉😂😢
Loved hearing this ❤ when I paid off my last 10,000 in debt (2019, I still have the canceled check !! ) have two years of security blanket put aside ., I just turned 65 and I have traveled to 13 countries in the last 3 years !! I lived like no one else , so I could "LIVE LIKE NO ONE ELSE " GOOD FOR YOU AND YOUR WIFE 💗💗
I felt that way after achieving such in school✅career ✅finances ✅travel . It’s okay not to have another goal, find hobbies and help others, because you are so blessed. I spent my entire life reaching goals. It’s freedom in not having a to do list.
He is really blessed.
Always set goals, no matter what they are
This helped me huge. 25 no debt can do without a job for 4 years and it’s hard to do anything different
I think tons of people r experiencing this at retirement too
Yes! When I walked across the stage with my doctorate it was like a great accomplishment, but then I thought Now what? Now I’m starting over in a greater field of research and service!❤
I’m happy for him. I would love to be in that situation Someday I will.
Me too
No better feeling than getting to build something with the person you love most.
I thought it would feel different is coming from a place that outside accomplishments will fulfill the soul. It doesn't!!
You have to find fulfillment from within!!
I think it’s the way our society is built (at least in the United States) that makes most people think this way. When we grow up and realize all of the accomplishments did not fill that void, we are lost & confused. This is the moment that our life really begins.
I’m in that season! Success and hollow! When you adopt the identity of “always challenge oneself and do hard things”. I love that, great advice and now I have the next set forward.
Just be grateful and enjoy!!! 😊
Joy comes from within.
Going straight to the point. Love it!
Happiness doesn't come from having things. It comes from being a part of things. Time to focus on what you want to do with this life. There are so many things that need doing and we need good people to do them.
Take some time to appreciate everything and get some hobbies but don’t make huge life changing decisions because you’re bored. At 28, I got the house, car and job along with a good chunk of the material things I wanted. 15 year old me never thought all of this possible. Last few months I’ve been feeling like caller. Now what, what’s the next big thing I should achieve. Life felt kinda boring, like I was supposed to do something more. It hit me one day that I’ve achieved things I worked a decade for, that my parents couldn’t their entire lives. For me, slowing down and appreciating everything was paramount. I haven’t bought more material things, using and enjoying what I have instead. I picked up a few new hobbies that even five years ago would have seemed ridiculous/impossible. Im spending more time with the people I love and on myself. I still get that annoying itch like I’m supposed to be doing something more but therapy is helping quiet that.
I had it all, at least I reached my goal. Got married, had kids and became a husband and father. Then things kind of fell apart from there. Kids moved out, wife wants a roommate so yeah.
Wife wants a roommate🤨 ooofff
@@landonlowe4029 Modern women don't like being wives (too traditional gender valued) Instead they want to be roommates where they get free room and board.
Not true.. most women i know make more money than their husband @nilsalmgren4492
Ha ha. My husband is want a roommate. But he does not want to leave me.
@@cashi4225 He may still be cheating. But if it is just no interest then you drew the rare guy. More common is my situation. Too bad people like us find people like them.
Went through this a yr ago and now decided to return to school! The world is your oyster, sir!
Life can be so tough that we don't always know how to plan for fun and spoiling ourselves a little. These may be small things, or really big ones: I could recently visit my son who now lives in a far-away country, and it was a wonderful experience I will cherish with gratitude for the rest of my life, especially because we both battled together when life was hard.
Volunteer in an inner city community center where the kids don't have much.
Blessed!!!! I can’t wait till the day I can say I have it all 😂
This is a great conversation. We all want to be where he is!!! But never thought this is how we could feel in the end. I am extremely happy, but we still have to work and we still have a lot to go. Thank you for this episode. It's an eye opening! Never thought achievement could feel this way!
The reason he isn’t happy is because happiness comes from within, not based on external achievements. 😅
He didn’t say he wasn’t happy, he just said he’d achieved all his goals and now didn’t know what else to do. Real happiness comes from knowing God and His plan for us in this one life we have been gifted. I hope he finds what His plan is, for to whom much is given much is also required.
@@kelliemurphy7933I’m extremely happy in my life and I’m an atheist it has nothing to do with believing in a fairytale
@@rory644 he still didn’t say he wasn’t happy, in fact he seemed really happy, just looking for new goals to aim for, two entirely different things. I’m glad you’re happy, as am I, and I have no doubt without God you can still be happy, after all they do say ignorance is bliss. However for long lasting eternal happiness you will need God, whether you believe that or not is irrelevant. You are of course entitled to your opinion, but that won’t save you from the eternal punishment that awaits everyone who chooses to live without God and mock Him.
He has personal issues. Also, we will always have debts. So we are really never out of debt.
@@kelliemurphy7933So if Christ's followers do poor job of convincing non believers then those non believers go to hell forever for the crime of not stroking your god's ego enough? That almost sounds like imperfect humans creating a deity and then projecting their anger, pettiness, and ego on to it. Like, not everyone wants to be my friend and I don't punish them for it.😂
Yep-practise gratitude and appreciating the small things and things and be of service
It’s a feeling like buyers remorse, never happy
What a wonderful man; people are lucky to him!
Every single day is our best day. These are the good times. Here and now!
Great call and fantastic advice. I needed to hear this too.
What you do is you breathe! Just breathe! And it is so worth getting there. Just let it be. And smile! Marinate in it!
💪🏼
I was able to breathe when I was in debt
@@MrHCify If that floats your boat, run with it.
@@9liveslisa🥳💨
This is the first really smart advice I have seen this guy give out.
Solid advice about the journal. I would add to take a calculated risk in something you are interested and passionate in. Keep up the good work men and women!
Wonderful call. 5:05 This is the most insightful thing and what I’m going to take away from this. Thanks Dr John
Im in a similar situation i feel content with everything right now
9:45 dude is COOL he will have many more great friendships ahead
I feel like this happens a lot with artists who pay dues for years and luck into celebrity overnight. This is why they are so ripe to be picked by abusive spouses, cults, etc.
This is where I’m at. And it is scary. I’m about to go back to school 😂 I’ve been being assertive with trying to make friends etc…. But this is what I needed to hear.
I would go back to school and spend the rest of my life learning, maybe start with something less incremental like take up a painting class or something, maybe don't start with a calculus course. Or learn a new hobby from a hired professional, it is gong to be cheaper and probably more meaningful to self study and hire a private tutor then give a college tuition money. Both husband and wife can learn a new skill together. That sounds like a wonderful next few years in my book.
Most honest question coming from success..spending all of your time working to not worry having people in your life that's just there but you keep working like they don't exist just to exist and when you finally get to the finish line your all burned out and don't feel anything sooo what now ?👍
Sit back and enjoy!
I don't know about you. But I am in the same situation, and it feels really good. Trust me. I don't need motivation, I just need places to visit, travel, and peace 😊
I would work on exercise and learning languages. I speak 5 languages and I walk/jog 20 miles a week.
💯🎯
Yes definitely
Would you mind sharing what tools you use to learn new languages? Is it just on YT? 🙏🏼
God is my purpose ❤
I have nothing but the love of my wife and family. I never achieved much career wise but sometimes we don’t have everything we want. Do we have what we need? Maybe?
As a graduate student, this was one of the most insightful episodes, personally.
This guy and his wife need to plan a holiday for a month, go somewhere special and different, somewhere you've never been! There's lots of the world to see! I did that after getting my Masters degree, I had the same feeling! But travelling reinspired me in life, there's lots to see and learn. Life is about the experience.
The only reason we do anything in life is to feel a certain way. No matter what the hell it is. It’s time more of us live for our truth and serve others to the highest good and stop working to survive with little cash. The money will flow when you flow when you’re in alignment with your truth. ❤ We’ve been taught our entire life your worth comes from what you do. It’s not true. So when we are like this guy a sort of shame comes with that kind of success and not sure where’s to go. You are all worthy without action. Follow your heart and create your life from authenticity not chasing worth outside of you. ❤
I’m in the same boat. This guy will start to learn that money means a lot less than he thinks it does, hopefully he pursues relationships with good people, and the life of service to others. I know it sounds corny, but there is no high greater than impacting someone else’s life in a positive way
5:10 “oooo that’s gooood”
he’s rEally putting a solution to the problem.. this goal was idealized and they attached a feeling TO this goal. NOW what feeling will we bring to this life!!
NOW
What an odd problem to have.... You did all the things you had to do to have peace. Enjoy your peace now! Live, have fun, travel, enjoy life. When I worked towards being debt free I didn't expect fireworks with my last payment. Such and odd expectation to have. Be happy that you did it and now find meaning in things other than working your ass off.
I suggest the caller watch the movie Soul.
This sounds like a humble brag to me
And your comments sounds like someone who's envious that they can't achieve the same thing
😮
@@ZukoTheShinigamisad when people are envious of people that are clearly not happy. Nobody needs to covet their neighbor cause nothing satisfies the soul besides Jesus. You don’t need to be toxic and talk trash. Turn to Christ and do better
😂😂😂
Nah, I’ve heard humble brags and this wasn’t it. You can hear in his voice he’s a little lost. It’s kind of how we think “must be nice” when someone wins the lottery. A lot of people just do not know how to steward their blessings well. That’s why you have stories of rich kids that have had everything handed to them, living a life devoid of purpose and ending up dying of a drug overdose. The grass is not always greener on the other side.
Success is a system, not a goal.
Women should be that way to: strong, responsible, trustworthy, good, open-hearted
Shouldn't everyone? These are all good qualities for humans in general.
Obviously this guy is lacking something in his life now he feels he has accomplished all his goals. He and his wife have worked their butts off to reach this level of success….and kudos to them.
What is missing is a relationship with Jesus. Only He can complete you.
God bless you .
Amen ❤
A great book on this topic is "The second mountain" by David Brooks
Thanks for the suggestion, I read the summary and immediately ordered the book. 🙏🏼
Now you could help others more!
Channel 14!!!
Only a 3 month emergency fund and you’re all out of goals?
😂😂
That's still an awesome achievement but they could definitely go for more. Especially seeing what the pandemic did and with today's job market.
yeeeeeah seems like he just called to humble brag. I've been debt free since I was 23. it's not that big of a deal tbh lol
Right lolololol. I almost spit. 3 months is a minimum goal
@hllymchll one of the most annoying callers thus far
This is what the so-called American dream can do. I hope the family looks outward and can serve others. Find passions, meaning and God and you’ll never be bored or stagnant.
I never got the point of making money for moneys sake, money is a means to do all the fun things you want (after making sure you’re stable and safe)
I paid off mortgage my only debt and i felt numb, i had dreamed of it for so long,now im retired have had both knees placed last yrar and living my best life, except for wheny children were small, nothi g is better than that lol
What an amazing problem to have..
Shallow!
Talk about a humble brag 😂
I saw Dr J just recently on RUclips
Hope one day my husband and I will payoff our mortgage 😢
What would it profit a man to gain the world and yet lost his soul, the Bible says. Make sure you are right with the Lord. I also “had it all.” The career, the family, and was about to get the house. But I knew I wasn’t right with God. I ran back to Him and the life I built became uprooted so I could follow Jesus fully. Again, make sure you are a born again Christian or else nothing else in the life will matter at the end
Very well said! Thank you!!!❤
What’s missing is a personal relationship with God my friend
🤦🏽♀️ You do realize not everyone believes there’s an old man who lives in the sky, right?
@@mesalouis8976sad bitter mad people that reject God never find rest don’t be so upset turn to Jesus
Bet this guy hasn’t run a marathon
Jesus is what now. This video is a perfect example of we will never feel fullfilled without Jesus Christ.
Lost people with zero gratitude will never find peace without the prince of peace. Time is drawing nigh
Said perfectly…..so very true!!!❤
❤ amen!
That’s exactly what I thought.
Exactly, the original human was created with the Holy Spirit of God. As a result of sin of Adam, we have inherited bodies without the God part. People will forever be incomplete without the Holy Spirit of God found in a relationship with Jesus.
It’s gotta be deeper than that, that’s like a guy getting to the NFL reaching his goal then losing all motivation. What happened is he thought he would feel like Superman, thought he would feel extraordinary and he still feels like the same ole guy. So now it’s blahhh
What if someone doesn’t share John Mayer’s sentiment? In terms of wanting to be the guy to call for anything? Then again he does have a family so I guess that’s the natural path for him to get on. Good luck to him and I think he should also remember to be grateful for the position he’s in so the blank slate would be less terrifying.
I don’t think the phd one is accurate unless it’s paid for. I graduated with a masters and felt Luke I’m about 1/3 of the way thru the slog…because student loans take at least twice as long…
The fact that u think u have it all is a problem...just goes to show we all have problems. U don't have it all, u lack humility. Even when u think u have it all...now u have the responsibility ot bless society, family and friends. That is a huge burden which u clearly do not feel and is a red flag in and of itself. I have no doubt life will humble you. The best teacher is life itself.
Have everything except actual happiness
Get right with God, and help others.
Get on your knees and thank God for your blessings and ask Him how can you serve Him. What a complaint. Feed the homeless. Volunteer with snow babies. Help the disabled.
I agree. When there is so much need in this world and this person has the God given ability, with God there is so much good that could be done. Let’s hope he chooses to turn to God and ask Him ‘what would you like me to do with all you have given me.’ For those who have been given much, much will be expected.