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Stephan I'm so glad that I found this video this morning. I'm sitting at my desk wondering what the hell is going on with the guy I'm dating. All mixed sign signals are getting on my nerves. Its like I'm taking a college course with this guy. This is the second time that we've tried this. I'm ready to disconnect from him completely if I don't get a clear understanding of where this is going. I bring so much to the table, so to speak, hell I could bring the table by my damn self! I'm the blessing and he can't seem to make up his mind. I thought grown men stopped playing games after 50 years old, but I guess I'm wrong.
@@carolin1187 he just literally said ily and made me fall in love just so that he could get all the other benefits without even defining it as anything
99% of the time!! On point! I remember an ex told me he had told his current gf at the time that he "doesn't believe in marriage." Mind you, when we were together, we talked about marriage all the dang time. I chuckled so hard! I said, "Let's keep it real; you just don't see marriage with HER!" Sure enough, he is married today. You have to avoid men saying this nonsense. Also avoid the ones who breadcrumb and string you along just enough to get what they want from you physically, or just your attention, but are unclear about their intentions or what they say they want vs. what they actually do doesn't line up.
Mixed signals is a result of him wanting to be friends with benefits.thats a selfish person that you don't need in your life. Periodt! Cut them off!!! You deserve someone who's gonna cherish, respect and admire you.🙏💯🙌❤️
Yes, being friends with benefits is supposed to be our consolation prize. 🙄 Don't accept it! Feels good in the moment to still be connected..but it will hurt in the end, because he doesn't really want you.
It's very simple. Self preservation is the key! Any mixesd signals, I just will switch to no contact. Mixed signals is just unhealthy. If a person plays mind games to evoke a reaction then it's just time to move on.
I just got out of a relationship with a guy that KNEW he wasn't for me and I ignored the red flags. He pursued the relationship and even prevented us breaking up a couple of times. I learned that YOU have to realize when someone is not for YOU. Don't leave that responsibility to someone else.
@@emiliarichard5445 The longer it goes on, the harder it gets. When they are not for you, there's really nothing you can do. If it's because of other things why they aren't ready, when they are and if you're available (not sitting around waiting), then God will bring them back on your path.
The longer we keep them the harder it is, because it becomes what we are you too. I had to ask myself, why am I waiting for him to make up his mind. I am the prize, he should be waiting for me to make up mines. Don't give your power away to someone who doesn't even deserve it or you.. God has something more then you could ever dream of, we just have to get out of his way. Stop trying to make something work that will/could never work, without giving up your morals and values.. Stay blessed my sister's
You are speaking facts! I have 6 brothers and I have observed this with my brothers and even guys I dated. Even if the guy saw a future with me but didn’t feel he was where he needed to be, they all have tried to stay connected to me in some way. I think where these type of men have to realize that they have to communicate clearly because the aftermath of the mixed signals can be detrimental and cause him to lose her for good. Women have grown tired of the mixed signals and if they are like me, would rather disconnect completely than to deal with the emotional pain that mixed signals cause.
@@shalalala868 Yes that part. I block real quick these days. Red flags, mixed signals etc. blocked. I don't have the time or energy to deal with it all. Especially the weak to the flesh game.
Yes! I always let this man back in. I went to school with him growing up. He was never disrespectful towards me when we became close in 2015. Even when I'd be upset with him and tell him things I'd regret. The love I have for him stayed the same. Almost 7 years and I finally told him that I'm exhausted of this "friendship" because my heart could no longer continue. He'd make me feel like he was truly in love with me... and man letting him go has been one of the toughest things I've ever done in my life cause we were good friends over all
I’ve learn to walk away from mixed signals but I will admit that my insecurities and over thinking brought on some of those mixed signals in the past and I self sabotage. That’s why it’s always good to heal before getting into a relationship.
Yup..getting fixated on why they faded and then drive oneself crazy. In reality, they are still the same person they were when they dissapeared and it shows emotional immaturity to not at least explain why they wanna call it quits. It's a decent thing to do when people have been intimate
Stop thinking about what men think or want to do. Act based on what you want, from life, not from people. Understand that every single relationship will bring an amount of disappointment because people are Flawed, so are you. Focus on living a life that fulfills you in which relationship are not essential to feel satisfied.
If a car on the freeway is changing it's turn signal from right to left, generally you would avoid the car because it could crash into you, it's the same way with a man who sends mixed signals, avoid them or they will crash into and leave your life a wreck.
Mixed signals and ghosting is so frustrating. This has happened so much with me and for years I internalized it, thinking there was something that I was doing to bring on this inconsistent behavior. I prefer completely disconnecting and moving on.
Dating and communication has really gone down a shit hole. Ghosting and slow fade is the new fad....HATE IT. This makes me feel better and hearing it from thousands of others dealing with the same issue
Men need to speak up! Throw your keys on the table, yuh feel me! Men quick to flirt but not willing to say what they feel. Man up!! Mature up!! When do men mature???? Ladies this why as Queens let’s stop looking at the superficiality. Dive deep!! If he can’t dive deep in convo that’s how you know!! Byeeeee
Ain’t that some sad ish...??? But let a women cheat in a relationship or in an marriage all hell breaks loose!! Let us play games.. they don’t how to take it. We all bleed red We all take dumps!! Man up!!! We need change this paradigm!
These are the things that makes a relationship not work because people can't/will not just be honest and say what they are feeling. This will make bitter people.
I broke up completely with a guy who gave me loads of mixed signals and justified it with the fact that we were friends that had come a long way. I went into no contact and healed from his toxicity. He recently contacted me, after I stayed away from him for 1 year and 3 months. Nothing about him has really changed. He wanted to go back to his ways but cos I changed, he didn't get the chance do that with me. I feel like I got my power back. Thanks Stephan for keeping this real.🙏🙏
I’ve finally reached a point in my life that I am no longer settling for “This is as good as it’s gonna get”. Amazing how a few guys come back sniffing around thinking that all those months/years where there was breadcrumbs, that I would welcome the heartache back. This happened when I was in pretty good health. I’m now battling stage 4 metastatic breast cancer since 2014 and I think that “if I wasn’t enough for them when I was well, I’m certainly not going to fool myself into believing that the ones that walked away, want me now” 🤷🏻♀️
"He wants you but he doesn't think he is the one for you " In today's world it is increasingly important to note that some men have become demasculated. And if questioned some will tell you they scared of you or find excuses towards your personality (my experience). Viewing women in high regard is great but also that is where you know who the person is and their self confidence. Some men want to be with , but is with because you are smart, calculated etc. If he is confused let him be.
They don't make enough videos that encourage men to be powerful and manly from a social media standpoint. That is a very sensitive and touching topic men naturally stray away from and will never probably admit to. The older generation of men have let things go too far now. American men, my heart goes out to you.
I had to work with my husband on the internalized guilt due to his financial situation (when we met). I always told him that we can work together to build our dream life....TOGETHER and I always meant it. I wasn't with him for the money, trust me!!! We made it though 😊, took a lot of work. I appreciate this vid and I'll save it, thanks so much 💖!
I can relate to this. I've dropped anyone who does this. I don't have time to waste and hate games. 🙄🤦🏽♀ I just want the one who'll bring me clarity and not confusion. 🙏🏽
So I drop these kind of men also when they don't see my worth. But when you e.g. ghosted or blocked them, do they write you why you did it? Is there smth coming back from them when you do it? The last guy did that with me, I blocked him and deleted him everywhere, he then messaged me the other day and told me that he was sad and disappointed of me blocking him
Listen to what they say first. It’s their actions after what they have said, is who they are. So if they cancel, pull back, ghost after some sweet talk, that’s their character.
This idea of mixed signals due to the idea of knowing they're not "the one" but stay in your face due to being "weak to the flesh" is eye opening. #Just say No#
I met a man two weeks ago in my recovery group. (He has 20 years and facilitates meetings etc) We connected immediately, and he was not being gross and aggressive but respectful. We went to an all night restaurant after and told each other our lives practically. There was awesome innocent flirting and good hugs, being in touch regularly by phone. I'm telling you I was convinced that he's the one. I could practically feel his affection for me when he just walked by. Then suddenly tonight it was like that connection was blocked he was restless during the meeting, inattentive, etc no hug as per usual. I'm 51 yo and he's 61! Is this nuts or what? I don't get it but I'm not gonna pursue it. I'm more than confused, I'm heartbroken. Yes even though we haven't known each other long. I know what I experienced was real because I haven't experienced it in 25 years. I'm too old for this shit, God help me! (Sorry for the Huge comment but I had to let it out)
Depends on what the recovery is from, as recovery denotes mental health. There may be some dynamics there that he hasn't expressed to you yet and doesn't know how. Good luck.
My ex was similar age. Still a player! He was living with a woman so be careful. They hide some info so watch out and then say it’s nothing or whatever.
6 mos situationship until I finally cut it off! Mixed signals, gaslightning, confusion. Stayed with a hope that it might work out. But no. 6 mos after, went back to my senses. Lost my self-esteem and myself in the process but I am still thankful. I know God pulled me out of that situation because he knew I won't give it up despite my instinct telling me to STOP. As an empath person, God knows I will ignore all the red flags. He gave me courage and strength to finally let go. Sent my closure message. He didn't reply. Well I was already expecting that. After all, no answer is an answer so I'm good. Thank you for this video. Learned a lot. God bless you.
Pay attention at all times. Listen to what he says. Watch what he does. Take things slow. Yes. He is right being sexy and desired is not enough. Does he like you? Does he talk to you? Does he support you and what you're doing? Is every moment between you physical? Have you met his friends?
It’s sad that we have to try and decode people because we can’t be honest with our intentions .. and for people not to be punished when they are honest in their intentions but it not what we want to hear.. smh
Fear, trauma, incompatibility, lack of healing, and distrust as well as different moral and ethical beliefs tore me and my ex partners relationship apart. It's been a month today since him and I have talked. It feels weird but we needed to go our separate ways. Weird when the person you were with lives like 5 blocks from you but it feels like they're 1,000 miles away...
Ngl, this Christmas was so hard for me. I was alone for the most part. I really started questioning whether I made the right choice leaving him and not answering his call. I was starting to think the toxicity was fine. I was never really the type to think money was everything, but this Christmas really made me realize that money is not everything. Healthy connections/relationships mean way more. I wish I had watch your videos on Christmas because your videos help me think straight
Omg same here I was crying for a little while then I asked the Holy spirit to please help me still some residual from that I am praying🙏 for full healing real soon
As usual, you are providing great insights into the reasons for mixed signals from men. However, we women should NEVER be involved with a man who is in a relationship with another woman. No exceptions. The man is responsible for changing his situation, if he is not happy, BEFORE he seeks someone new.
Whew! I would most likely just walk away from it all connection or no connection because of all the mixed signals and emotions it definitely will drive you crazy 😩Great topic!
Focus on goals not men. You can control your diet, switch jobs, improve your fitness and have loyal girlfriends but you cant control selfish, cruel narcissists. Love and support yourself..become self sufficient.
I’m learning that if you have to question it , that in itself is your answer. If you have to ask chances are they don’t actually feel how you feel. Always remember ladies, if he wanted to he would
One thing I would never do which I used to do is confront the guy and ask him ""what you want from us "? or ask him why he's giving mixed signals " Never do this all it would do is just make you feel worse . It will make you feel like you're begging him and being desperate he's actions right now is showing you exactly who he is!! you accept him for that, or leave him alone. don't come from him and try and talk anything over
Thank you for clarifying the reasons WHY men send mixed signals. Unfortunately I seem to attract those types of men for some reason which leaves me continuously frustrated. Now I’m learning through your videos, books and other sources how to break that cycle of accepting these types of behavior. I thank you. 🙏
Great video. Agree with all of your points. #1 sign of mixed signal is being unavailable & inconsistent as you mentioned. Relationships are like investments if they can't give you their time & attention then what really is the point of it all. Also, if he has indecisiveness and can't make up his mind then that will also indicate the man has not matured enough to know what he wants. Love should feel free to call, free to visit, and just free to love without any drama. anything else is a time waster. Once they "quench their thirst "hopefully they will be ready to love, although I thought love was the unquenchable thirst you can never get enough of...well maybe in my book.. Thank you for the video. Blessings & peace to you now & in 2022.
I think it's important to talk with each other, cause we end up hurt in the end. To where we don't speak anymore, due to a misunderstanding and miscommunication on BOTH SIDES. mistakes happen also.
This is so apt and that’s exactly the reason they avoid the conversation so that they can continue to feel good in the moment. And all this may be happening unconsciously so it’s important for the woman to use mind to make sense of the situation. Even nice guys can waste our time
@@JusticeC-307 Guys will be guys - we must not forget that. No age, no nicety , no words -just actions are going to be the yardstick for us to know who is right for us !
You’ve brought so much clarity through your platform! You have the IT factor, especially when it comes to breaking down issues and mindsets in the way people think or perceive certain scenarios pertaining to relationships. Thanks Stephan for your educated insight on relationships!
If a man does not have the backbone to communicate openly and honestly then do NOT waste your time. Do NOT allow them to manipulate you into an emotional roller coaster ride. Cut them loose and move on. To all my sisters out there, KNOW YOUR WORTH! You deserve better.
As I listened to your dating advice and let me say also that I have four of your paperback books that are full of highlighted pages. However, I just wanted to say that I've learned from this last dating experience that if the devil wants you he will send all kinds of signals but the worst one for me is the one that plays on my emotions. God designed a woman to be emotional, caring, and compassionate, even with Jackass. But once a man senses this, this is the open door to use and mistreat. It takes a lot of mental energy to defeat the devil and his tactics. Thanks for all your dating advice and videos. I love God too much to keep playing Hell's game. Some women are so strong (Wonder Woman) strength that dealing with some men is useless. Being single is the new normal!!! At least, I'm at peace.
I went through this exact crap. Complete waste of time. Met this man a DATING site, we talked endlessly, he told me what a wonderful woman I was, how beautiful I was, how invaluable our "friendship" was, kissed me, went on a couple dates, and then he told me he wasn't for me. He kept telling me that I deserve a wonderful man, and he's decided to pursue an "office romance". I'm so sick of this bs. If you don't want me, leave me alone! Don't look at me, don't talk to me, don't touch me, don't bother my peace! Leave. Me. Alone. I don't even have the time of day to give you.
I’m currently going through the 2nd reason..which I appreciate him for having a high respect for a kind of woman like me and wanting to be that man that I deserve. I can tell based off the things he has going on in his life + conversations we’ve had he knows he can be the man that I deserve but he’s not ready. But he still is wanting to continue our talking stage and seeing eachother I guess while he’s getting hisself more together. In my head I’m like why did you ask me out on a date knowing all of this? Why introduce me to your family? Why try and work on a relationship with me? It’s like my feelings are so there for him regardless of his situation like you mentioned in this video. I have an attachment towards him..but it’s like the mix signals have been happening. This video came just in time like omg😅 I love getting a better perspective on this from a man’s point of view everything was so on point!!💯
My exact truth.....it's been 2 weeks now since my partner told me that I am a great woman and amazing wife material but he is not ready ...I have not heard his voice or seen him in 2 weeks.... He will text but only wants to be friends...I am very emotional attached to him ..I'm just trying to wrap my mind around it..
This makes complete sense, thank you! ❤ When I met someone, he spoke of wanting to have a better job and have a home before he took on a relationship, but he already knew who he wanted. He would send me a message and tell me he didn't want to hurt me and I should walk away, yet we were just friends. 🤷♀️ Then, he would shower me with affection and attention after I told him I would never leave him bc him not being around me was more hurtful and would kill me. We have a crazy relationship. We are close friends, fight like a couple (1 of our mutual friends teased me about it), then make up by talking all night and end up stronger. I know he's not ready. I would just hate if he feels like he has to be more to be with me bc I'd rather reach those goals together as a couple and have even more reason to celebrate as we do. I backed off and don't spend all day with him like I used to. It hurt for him to say things that were clear to me he has feelings for me (he makes sexual remarks), but never flat out admits it. If he really has intentions of being with me, he will miss me and realize how my presence changes his day and how he feels. I actually can't shake being in love with him, but I can't wait around and can't keep letting him tug on me emotionally. He will ALWAYS be one of my closest friends though. I love him deeply and I want him happy even if it's not with me.
As I see it, generally speaking, being a woman is not the easiest job in the world. It’s tough when our emotions get the best of us. I believe in those moments that is when we compromise our value, worth, and respect for the desire of true and lasting love and happiness. Certainly, love is a battlefield. I just believe that an emotionally healed and spiritual led woman is the greatest weapon for the battlefield of all relationships. God is NOT the author of uncertainty, the devil is. Although we may not have full disclosure for the mate God has for us, he will NEVER send us someone that has uncertainty, deception, confusion, complications, etc. attached to them. Remember, discernment and wisdom are spiritual gifts from God. Again, I believe we women lose our way in the area of selecting a romantic partner because our desires overtake us. In another video, Stephan said we should love without being afraid to lose that person. That statement was piercing!! Walking away is one of the most empowering and attractive attribute a woman/man has. It says to be in your presence demands correctness of the other person. I say this with great certainty because I know my worth. Clowns are for entertainment NOT romantic partners!!!
Funny I said that to someone, an they said you know we can never be friends, I want more than that, now 5yrs later I realise he wasn't even talking to me, it was someone else he denied being in any contact with..
You make sense with your points. Hopefully 2022 we move past this stage of trying to figure out what these men are doing 😁 and finally get settled with the man God has for me (US)❤️
One thang is for sure I have no problem being by myself for the rest of my life before I wait around for a man that seems to not know what he wants after 2 and a half years of being friends... Ive been single now Jan 21 will be 7yrs & I can gladly go on 7 more or more being single in this world we gotta enough to deal with besides a man ...Hunee please it gives me even more to put my focus on God & his soon coming ..
I am a woman and even I always felt I needed to meet more people so that when I finally choose the one, I won't feel like I settled. I did it, I needed it. Now I know I'm not missing out and I appreciate the one I have fully.
"The Man God Has for You" is a great book. I love these youtube sessions, but I love the information in the book even more. I highly recommend purchasing it.
Being single for over years… (actually I never had a relationship in my entire life) got me save a lot of problems that this guy mention it. It’s truly hard to find someone who really likes you. When you found the one, he gives mixed signals. Poor me.
Stephan, I love the way you cover every angle of this issue. It is such a common dynamic. And, as always, you present the information clearly and with meaning. I especially love that you point out that addressing the mixed signal issue with the other party is an action we take to promote our own sense of clarity and PEACE! Thank you for the work you are doing! It is so important.
Thank you for sharing this video. I have been struggling with this mixed signals thing for the past 8 months and I have finally decided to move on this new year rather than keep on waiting and asking. I am the prize. I need to value myself better and do what is best for me even though its hard. I am trying to cut communication but it's been really hard for the past 4 days. 😭😭😭
I was in a ‘relationship’ like this he was hot then cold, all I wanted was to know what ‘we’ are? Dating? Just friends? That was too much for him so I walked away. I’m too old for that crap lol! You want me or you don’t 🤷♀️ it’s that simple.
Maan! I swear I hold my breathe, everytime you mention an scenario! But your informative information is very,very helpful. You have helped me heal in a healthy manner,and I am grateful. Thank You!💙
Thanks Stephen, I’ve been feeling really low after someone I liked basically threw my feelings back in my face - but thank you for helping me understand potentially what the reason for their behaviour is and why - you’ve great smile! love your channel keep up the great work! 🙌🏽♥️
You're right!!! I have a lot of men friends. And they have told me in my face... They have a lotif respect for me...that OUR friendship is worth more than 2 mins. I appreciate that...and makes me feel great that he appreciates our friendship
Wow... this video was truly a God-send. Running through all the scenarios and mixed signals, driving myself crazy with conflicting advice going back and forth. I will address it for my own peace of mind and then release it. Thank you so much, sir! May God richly bless you!!
He only wants to be friends. He does everything for me. mowing repair items in my house.. loves my mother.. he tells me if if and when he's ready to be in a relationship I would be the one for him.. we talk and text all day talk for hours on the phone..began having benefits..once in a while .. he's not financially set to do what he wants to do..
@@carolenaedwards4633 My friend and i started as friends then with benefits. I enjoyed the arrangement too since I was also not sure and healing. We both kept improving ourselves separately and coming together and it grew stronger as we individually healed ourselves. He now sees us together in the future and i am a single mom empty nester. I think alot has to do with your age and station in life as to what one wants out of it.
I can stop feeling like I'm going crazy, now, and accept the Part I played... Thank you, sincerely, for the Clarity. Finally, I can continue to be Great & quit stressing...💫 Also, thanks for taking the time to try to respond to as many comments as you have the time & attention for. It's noticed. 🙂
Stephan!. Although this comment is unrelated to this video. I just want to thank you for your consistent content, you are like the older brother I never had. I watch and rewatch all your videos. I am now more positive, happy and feminine!. I met a great man late November and he proposed in two weeks!. We both love God and share similar values. Our wedding is in Q1 2022. Thank you Stephan. God bless you.
I had the same scenario with this guy good guy I think we would work well together but he keeps going back-and-forth on one moment he wants to be cuddly and get to know me but he could never give me a precise answer on where he sees this going and I feel like it was wasting my time because I told him that I did not want to be involved unless it was going to lead to something serious. Thank you Stephen! This hit my situation, now I’m cordial but nothing extra!
I swear I love all your videos, It pinpoints not just the man’s problems but the woman’s problem as well. And it really makes me not only understand him but understand myself in the situation , I’ve continued to noticed that i am a reflection of what I attract. I’ve attracted great men while also attracting confusing men. So what I’m trying to say is I am a great woman but I am very much young and confused and that’s just something I need to work on. If you don’t love yourself you will attract men who also don’t love themselves and most likely will not love you. Thank you for your videos 🤍
In asking the right questions, the ones that were forthright always won, because I was able to use my own discernment on how to move forward. Some fears creep because of what the answer may or may not be, and people don't want to be disappointed, especially if they're feeling that other person. Informative and also great video. Happy New Year..2022!
Good observations, Stephan! I've experienced one or a combination of these scenarios you mentioned, smh. Despite this, will give God all the glory and learn from it. Forgiveness plays a role and lots of prayer in order to free yourself from a lot of hurt. Thank you for sharing!
Had that most of my life "Good girl, dont wanna hurt her". Respect to them now as since my abusive relationship i seem to attract those who think they're addicted or obsessed with me but back away after all the love bombing. Im broken man.
An amazing video! That's the thing. Maybe these men do have a good heart and maybe they their intention is good, But none of that matters if they are playing games when they don't wish to build a life with you and they are destructive to you at the end. Sometimes they are toxic and end up doing more damage than good.
Up down, left right, in or out, where is the confusion I believe they know exactly what they're doing and what their intentions are there's nothing mixed about the signals the seat is deceit!
I just experienced this situation. It was hard but easy to walk away bcz I know what mixed signals look like bcz of past experiences. I even warned him that I've seen this b4 but he still decided to go that route & bcz of that, I spoke my mind which let him know I'm not a knucklehead & all of a sudden, I didn't hear from him anymore. #notwastinganytime
Thank you, Coach! There’s always a small twist about how men behave when they are feeling their lady. There are good men out here, and that's what matters. Women need to make sure they are ready to receive the good man that they ask for and keep that standard of a healthy and fruitful relationship.
Feels like now as an older single mum there is no man for me. Just many men wanting sex only relationships. I'm just so sick of these men, it's hard not to internalise this rejection. I give up on love!
@@MeetStephanSpeaks thank you. I was lucky enough to have a very loving relationship but unfortunately he passed away from cancer. Twenty years on I'm still grateful for the time we had. He brought me back to God, turned my life around and loved me like no one has. In that way I know I have actually been very blessed and he was God sent. I wish everyone had love in their life like that.
I feel the same way I'm a single mom in my 40s. Don't give up, I learned about manifesting and it changed my life! I have someone amazing for the first time in my life and watching MANIFEST with Jasmine changed my life! It works! Watch her videos! You have to embrace and feel and believe that person already exists and is coming to you and I did that and boom immediately met him! We've been growing strong for a year and a half now I have never been happier! I had given up from being abused all my life by narcissists. Manifesting works! It's subconscious and works by faith in yourself and what you know you deserve. Don't pay attention or give energy to circumstances or anything negative that is the secret. Keep knowing you are getting him now or whatever you want. Just watch her you have nothing to lose!
I need to be ready as well. I need to work on myself and my own healing so I can be ready to build and grow a commited, long-term relationship without losing myself.
I totally understand this truth. However, actions shows so much. In order to just know what we need as adults…I feel being honest and communicate is key. No mental games need to be played. 🤦🏾♀️🤣
Insightful video; learned some new things and now have a new perspective on certain things! About to tell him the jig is up. We are two grown, professional, intelligent people and I don't have the time, desire, or patience. This will separate the wheat from the tare.
I heard you on the point you made on FEAR. It resonates. 🙋♀️ I wouldn't have imagined fear from one person pouring into the other person and as a result losing a potentially beautiful relationship; & possibly marriage. Healing is PRIORITY. (And I do tend to over analyze but I've learned to SPEAK when something is bothering me. It always works. ) Obrigado Stephan 🙂❤
Thank you for doing this and so many of your videos for us! I have learned alot more about myself as well as trying to understand men and their intentions. You are very easy to follow and want to keep pursuing your lessons. Great job! Please keep doing your great work.
I said this before but I use ur vids to help myself be better and figure myself out....so many guys put a bad name for me just cause I'm a guy and I hope listening to you could help me be better
I think men that are insecure and dealing with trust issues often mislead women. They make statements such as I don't want to be responsible for anyone but yet they are dating and meeting new people and they want to continue sleeping with you. Like he said just because a man enjoys you, it doesn't mean they want to committ. The Flesh can get you caught up and people end up getting hurt. When they don't move to the next level then you must move out of the picture. This guy is so on point!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
This has been really helpful Stephen thankyou...one thing I've learned is that we've all had some kind of trauma or situation growing up which has molded you and shaped the adult you are and we are all in this life just 'experiencing' and I think we have to have to somehow re learn, re educate ourselves on how to open those lines of communication in a healthy way not only for yourself but potentially a new partner...were all in this together and yes men are wired differently , just be natural and true to yourself around him..im still learning all the time. Which is why I've found your channel..you resonate with such genuine concern for each of us to be healthy and have happy relationships. I've learnt so much all ready as im working through your videos and im hopefully going to take on board all you've said and approach the guy thats in my life in such a way that It will either end up with me walking away or create a deeper bond between us. So watch this space lol 😁 Thanks for your coaching 🙏 ❤
One minute he’s telling me he wants to be with me, then the next minute he’s giving me advice to take with me if I’m not with him so I know what to look for in a man. That dude was so confusing and contradicting I told him to lose my number and blocked him. He didn’t know what he wanted and put his insecurities on me.
Sometimes men appear equally complicated or Sometimes even more than women. I wish they were as simple as they really think. When you address the behavior that's when you get all the answers to make a decision one way or the other, no second guessing, just execute. Thanks Steph!
Ugh I’m going through this right now with a guy I’ve been talking to he’s definitely been playing games & when I call him out on his mess he tries to turn the tables on me & say that I’m being weird & the vibes are off when I’ve been consistent & he’s been inconsistent he claims he wants to fix the issues but I’m over it & over him I wish him the best but I’m all the way good I refuse to be a fool
Kanesha, I understand exactly what you are going through. As a young senior citizen who would like to be in a relationship, old men, near the grave have the nerve to play Stupid Games. I have stated to nicely tell them, I want a relationship, but I Do Not Need You or A Relationship. I am Protecting My Heart and My Body from their Foolishness. I just have to keep it moving. Let 1 person know you are trying out the Relationship. That way, it is easier to Toss That Junk in The Trash if it turns out to be trash. Tell him why you are no longer interested in him, maybe he will learn something for the next person. But, he will not be able to Play You... Real Talk. Yada Yada. I am a Black Woman. Yada Yada Thanks Stephen for your Insightful, Valuable Information....
Hey @meetstephanspeaks - I had prayed to God for an understanding about a situation and you popped up. You know the Word of God asks us to have compassion and understanding and love and no judgement for our fellow human beings and if I would have heard this 2-3 years ago, I would have just been still angry. But now, it helps me understand this one person and I am going to leave it to God, because after all, it’s his plan over mine. But to heal, I needed to understand him and this helps. God answered my prayer and I am so happy to see you are a believer and I love how you respond to everyone❤ God bless you my friend!
I want you to receive the man who is truly best for you, the man God has for you ❤️ Get "The Man God Has For You" here 👉 www.themangodhasforyou.com
Hello Stephan how can I contact you for a video chat .
@@R-T32 For coaching and more visit my site www.stephanspeaks.com/
or
❤️ Join my FREE text community. Text "LOVE" to 770-373-4246 or click here 👉 my.community.com/stephanspeaks
I'm going to purchase your book as soon as I get some money in my account in the bank.
Stephan I'm so glad that I found this video this morning. I'm sitting at my desk wondering what the hell is going on with the guy I'm dating. All mixed sign signals are getting on my nerves. Its like I'm taking a college course with this guy. This is the second time that we've tried this. I'm ready to disconnect from him completely if I don't get a clear understanding of where this is going. I bring so much to the table, so to speak, hell I could bring the table by my damn self! I'm the blessing and he can't seem to make up his mind. I thought grown men stopped playing games after 50 years old, but I guess I'm wrong.
@@2Notlaw girl no…I just stopped talking to a guy 55 and was confused & giving beyond mixed signals 🤦🏽♀️it was a situationship
Coward is the man who ignites the love in a woman's heart without the intention of loving her
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
@@carolin1187 he just literally said ily and made me fall in love just so that he could get all the other benefits without even defining it as anything
Wow! I love this!
@@carolin1187 Awww Carolin, that's soo sweet of you. Wish you the same💙💙💙
This!!!!! 🎯🎯🎯
They know exactly what they want. They’re just using whoever they can until they find the one they want. Period.
Exactly... don't be a placeholder.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
99% of the time!! On point! I remember an ex told me he had told his current gf at the time that he "doesn't believe in marriage." Mind you, when we were together, we talked about marriage all the dang time. I chuckled so hard! I said, "Let's keep it real; you just don't see marriage with HER!"
Sure enough, he is married today. You have to avoid men saying this nonsense. Also avoid the ones who breadcrumb and string you along just enough to get what they want from you physically, or just your attention, but are unclear about their intentions or what they say they want vs. what they actually do doesn't line up.
I want my copy.
Yep! The raw truth.
If he isn’t matching your energy, he isn’t interested. A man is never to busy, if he really wants you he will find the time to get to you.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
Exactly!
Absolutely!. That is so important!
Fact !! MJNoirUnicorn & if he calls you girl ? , run !!!!!!!! , cause you know the rest of the story
True that 😁😊
The only relationship advice you need is...
If they like you, you'll know.
If they don't, you'll be confused.
👏
Mixed signals is a result of him wanting to be friends with benefits.thats a selfish person that you don't need in your life. Periodt! Cut them off!!! You deserve someone who's gonna cherish, respect and admire you.🙏💯🙌❤️
Factzzzz
💯 Facts
Wonderful answer.
Yes, being friends with benefits is supposed to be our consolation prize. 🙄 Don't accept it! Feels good in the moment to still be connected..but it will hurt in the end, because he doesn't really want you.
What if he doesn’t even want to sleep with you because he claims to respect you?
“Indecision is a decision” great point 👍🏽
It's very simple. Self preservation is the key! Any mixesd signals, I just will switch to no contact. Mixed signals is just unhealthy. If a person plays mind games to evoke a reaction then it's just time to move on.
@@sherileenlambert2784 your absolutely right
Indecision is always but always a NO.
I just got out of a relationship with a guy that KNEW he wasn't for me and I ignored the red flags. He pursued the relationship and even prevented us breaking up a couple of times. I learned that YOU have to realize when someone is not for YOU. Don't leave that responsibility to someone else.
Thats so true im in that situation right now its so hard but i know there's nothing between us
I need to.let him go like today and forget about him its driving me crazy.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback.
@@emiliarichard5445 The longer it goes on, the harder it gets. When they are not for you, there's really nothing you can do. If it's because of other things why they aren't ready, when they are and if you're available (not sitting around waiting), then God will bring them back on your path.
The longer we keep them the harder it is, because it becomes what we are you too. I had to ask myself, why am I waiting for him to make up his mind. I am the prize, he should be waiting for me to make up mines. Don't give your power away to someone who doesn't even deserve it or you.. God has something more then you could ever dream of, we just have to get out of his way. Stop trying to make something work that will/could never work, without giving up your morals and values.. Stay blessed my sister's
You are speaking facts! I have 6 brothers and I have observed this with my brothers and even guys I dated. Even if the guy saw a future with me but didn’t feel he was where he needed to be, they all have tried to stay connected to me in some way. I think where these type of men have to realize that they have to communicate clearly because the aftermath of the mixed signals can be detrimental and cause him to lose her for good. Women have grown tired of the mixed signals and if they are like me, would rather disconnect completely than to deal with the emotional pain that mixed signals cause.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
That part, sis!!
@@shalalala868 Yes that part. I block real quick these days. Red flags, mixed signals etc. blocked. I don't have the time or energy to deal with it all. Especially the weak to the flesh game.
Bingo!!! You said a mouth full 🙌
Yes! I always let this man back in. I went to school with him growing up. He was never disrespectful towards me when we became close in 2015. Even when I'd be upset with him and tell him things I'd regret. The love I have for him stayed the same. Almost 7 years and I finally told him that I'm exhausted of this "friendship" because my heart could no longer continue. He'd make me feel like he was truly in love with me... and man letting him go has been one of the toughest things I've ever done in my life cause we were good friends over all
Right. With men, it's either they do or they don't. Simple. Cut that off and find someone who's direct and assertive with you.💯🙌❤️
@UCPBO9gLGy8ujsJ7xjARI7ow thanks Stephen🙏❤️
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
Exactly!
Exactly they not gonna have you guessing if they sure about you
I’ve learn to walk away from mixed signals but I will admit that my insecurities and over thinking brought on some of those mixed signals in the past and I self sabotage. That’s why it’s always good to heal before getting into a relationship.
Yup..getting fixated on why they faded and then drive oneself crazy. In reality, they are still the same person they were when they dissapeared and it shows emotional immaturity to not at least explain why they wanna call it quits. It's a decent thing to do when people have been intimate
Ohhh this is sooooooo me!
Same
How did you heal?
@@greentreesage6287 work in progress but selfcare
Stop thinking about what men think or want to do. Act based on what you want, from life, not from people. Understand that every single relationship will bring an amount of disappointment because people are Flawed, so are you. Focus on living a life that fulfills you in which relationship are not essential to feel satisfied.
Sandra, you said it right.
@@BrendaBaBoom yes!❤️
Love it!
Amen🙏💕 I'm going back to school.
Absolutely!!
My grandad used to say"in business and love it is a yes or no, everything in between is dodgy!!"
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback.
@@MeetStephanSpeaks you more than welcome🙏❤️🤗
What's dodgy?
If a car on the freeway is changing it's turn signal from right to left, generally you would avoid the car because it could crash into you, it's the same way with a man who sends mixed signals, avoid them or they will crash into and leave your life a wreck.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
Excellent analogy
Luv this 🎯
Wow amazing
This is the BEST analogy I’ve ever seen for this situation. SPOT ON!💯
I find men like the idea of being with me but run from the reality of what it takes to be with me.
I feel you it isn't an easy situation but you need to focus on doing what is truly best!
@@MeetStephanSpeaks Absolutely, it filters the wrong people out without me having to break a sweat! 💅😉
These to me are not Men. These to me are 🤡in 👑, there focus is them and what they can get. Have the cake and eat it. Selfish.
Really story of life and I’m tired of it honestly. I just want to be with who I’m supposed to be with
Mixed signals and ghosting is so frustrating. This has happened so much with me and for years I internalized it, thinking there was something that I was doing to bring on this inconsistent behavior. I prefer completely disconnecting and moving on.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback.
I feel mixed signals and ghosting is bad behavior and a need for control. I won’t let anyone punish me. NO CONTACT handles that.
I freak that same way. I’m getting to the point where I don’t even want to entertain anyone that gives me mixed signals.
Inconsistency is an instant turn off. I just go no contact once I figure out he’s playing games.
A hurting man is always in a town near you.
Dating and communication has really gone down a shit hole. Ghosting and slow fade is the new fad....HATE IT. This makes me feel better and hearing it from thousands of others dealing with the same issue
Glad I could help 🙏
A man who ghost will eventually become a ghost of himself. The universe takes no Injustice
@@followGreatness serves him right.
Men need to speak up! Throw your keys on the table, yuh feel me!
Men quick to flirt but not willing to say what they feel.
Man up!! Mature up!!
When do men mature????
Ladies this why as Queens let’s stop looking at the superficiality. Dive deep!! If he can’t dive deep in convo that’s how you know!! Byeeeee
Men don't mature .... EVER! 😁
Ain’t that some sad ish...???
But let a women cheat in a relationship or in an marriage all hell breaks loose!! Let us play games.. they don’t how to take it.
We all bleed red
We all take dumps!!
Man up!!!
We need change this paradigm!
1q
These are the things that makes a relationship not work because people can't/will not just be honest and say what they are feeling. This will make bitter people.
The truth surfaces when you purposely check the individual’s actions then make a decision to stay or move on.
Exactly
Men will try you until they are checked. Don’t be flattered by attention from a stranger. Take time to know someone. Know your value.
😂😂😂😂one try that with me It didn't work
Consistency is key. Even when they have you.... It's required.
Absolutely
I can listen to you all day. Your videos are therapeutic even if the situation doesn’t apply to me.
Glad to hear that thank you for your feedback ❤️
I definitely agree - these are the very best honest videos out there for certain !!!
Yessss!!
I broke up completely with a guy who gave me loads of mixed signals and justified it with the fact that we were friends that had come a long way. I went into no contact and healed from his toxicity. He recently contacted me, after I stayed away from him for 1 year and 3 months. Nothing about him has really changed. He wanted to go back to his ways but cos I changed, he didn't get the chance do that with me. I feel like I got my power back. Thanks Stephan for keeping this real.🙏🙏
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that ❤️
I’ve finally reached a point in my life that I am no longer settling for “This is as good as it’s gonna get”. Amazing how a few guys come back sniffing around thinking that all those months/years where there was breadcrumbs, that I would welcome the heartache back. This happened when I was in pretty good health. I’m now battling stage 4 metastatic breast cancer since 2014 and I think that “if I wasn’t enough for them when I was well, I’m certainly not going to fool myself into believing that the ones that walked away, want me now” 🤷🏻♀️
May GOD heal you
Those trifling back …. you don’t give the time of day to.
My prayers 🙏🏽 are with you for all God’s healing and blessings🌈
@@BrendaBaBoom Thank you 🙏🏼 it’s not easy. Happy New Year to you 🎊🎊🎊
@@awakane3114 Thank you 🙏🏼
Stay strong, sister! There's love for all of us out here. Stay hopeful and positive! 💖
"He wants you but he doesn't think he is the one for you " In today's world it is increasingly important to note that some men have become demasculated. And if questioned some will tell you they scared of you or find excuses towards your personality (my experience). Viewing women in high regard is great but also that is where you know who the person is and their self confidence. Some men want to be with , but is with because you are smart, calculated etc.
If he is confused let him be.
It definitely isn't an easy situation but the focus should be on doing what is truly best 🙏
They don't make enough videos that encourage men to be powerful and manly from a social media standpoint. That is a very sensitive and touching topic men naturally stray away from and will never probably admit to. The older generation of men have let things go too far now. American men, my heart goes out to you.
If you are the "one." He will move Heaven and Earth! If you have to ask if he likes you then the answer is no!!!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
@@MeetStephanSpeaks you more than welcome ❤️🤗
I had to work with my husband on the internalized guilt due to his financial situation (when we met). I always told him that we can work together to build our dream life....TOGETHER and I always meant it. I wasn't with him for the money, trust me!!! We made it though 😊, took a lot of work. I appreciate this vid and I'll save it, thanks so much 💖!
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback ❤️
Don’t not let him be the man though
Thank you for sharing! I too am currently dealing with this.
@@MeetStephanSpeaks thank you for this video, always on time!
@@Hebrewsista me too 😢
I can relate to this. I've dropped anyone who does this. I don't have time to waste and hate games. 🙄🤦🏽♀ I just want the one who'll bring me clarity and not confusion. 🙏🏽
Yeah exactly 😢❤ it’s insane how this is a typical behavior in LA also
So I drop these kind of men also when they don't see my worth. But when you e.g. ghosted or blocked them, do they write you why you did it? Is there smth coming back from them when you do it? The last guy did that with me, I blocked him and deleted him everywhere, he then messaged me the other day and told me that he was sad and disappointed of me blocking him
Listen to what they say first. It’s their actions after what they have said, is who they are. So if they cancel, pull back, ghost after some sweet talk, that’s their character.
This idea of mixed signals due to the idea of knowing they're not "the one" but stay in your face due to being "weak to the flesh" is eye opening. #Just say No#
Yup sis it’s a bunch of bs
I met a man two weeks ago in my recovery group. (He has 20 years and facilitates meetings etc) We connected immediately, and he was not being gross and aggressive but respectful. We went to an all night restaurant after and told each other our lives practically. There was awesome innocent flirting and good hugs, being in touch regularly by phone. I'm telling you I was convinced that he's the one. I could practically feel his affection for me when he just walked by. Then suddenly tonight it was like that connection was blocked he was restless during the meeting, inattentive, etc no hug as per usual. I'm 51 yo and he's 61! Is this nuts or what? I don't get it but I'm not gonna pursue it. I'm more than confused, I'm heartbroken. Yes even though we haven't known each other long. I know what I experienced was real because I haven't experienced it in 25 years. I'm too old for this shit, God help me! (Sorry for the Huge comment but I had to let it out)
🙏 I hope he reaches the point of truly doing what is best.
@@MeetStephanSpeaks Thank you for reading my comment and your kind thoughts.
women we struggle with love n affection, finding the one at any age dont feel bad
Depends on what the recovery is from, as recovery denotes mental health. There may be some dynamics there that he hasn't expressed to you yet and doesn't know how. Good luck.
My ex was similar age. Still a player! He was living with a woman so be careful. They hide some info so watch out and then say it’s nothing or whatever.
6 mos situationship until I finally cut it off! Mixed signals, gaslightning, confusion. Stayed with a hope that it might work out. But no. 6 mos after, went back to my senses. Lost my self-esteem and myself in the process but I am still thankful. I know God pulled me out of that situation because he knew I won't give it up despite my instinct telling me to STOP. As an empath person, God knows I will ignore all the red flags. He gave me courage and strength to finally let go. Sent my closure message. He didn't reply. Well I was already expecting that. After all, no answer is an answer so I'm good. Thank you for this video. Learned a lot. God bless you.
Pay attention at all times. Listen to what he says. Watch what he does. Take things slow. Yes. He is right being sexy and desired is not enough. Does he like you? Does he talk to you? Does he support you and what you're doing? Is every moment between you physical? Have you met his friends?
It’s sad that we have to try and decode people because we can’t be honest with our intentions .. and for people not to be punished when they are honest in their intentions but it not what we want to hear.. smh
I feel you it definitely isn't an easy situation but we need to focus on doing what is truly best 🙏
Fear, trauma, incompatibility, lack of healing, and distrust as well as different moral and ethical beliefs tore me and my ex partners relationship apart. It's been a month today since him and I have talked. It feels weird but we needed to go our separate ways. Weird when the person you were with lives like 5 blocks from you but it feels like they're 1,000 miles away...
Ngl, this Christmas was so hard for me. I was alone for the most part. I really started questioning whether I made the right choice leaving him and not answering his call. I was starting to think the toxicity was fine. I was never really the type to think money was everything, but this Christmas really made me realize that money is not everything. Healthy connections/relationships mean way more. I wish I had watch your videos on Christmas because your videos help me think straight
🙏
Omg same here I was crying for a little while then I asked the Holy spirit to please help me still some residual from that I am praying🙏 for full healing real soon
Me to. I was in a trauma bonding relationship for 11 years and still can't break from it.
As usual, you are providing great insights into the reasons for mixed signals from men. However, we women should NEVER be involved with a man who is in a relationship with another woman. No exceptions. The man is responsible for changing his situation, if he is not happy, BEFORE he seeks someone new.
Whew! I would most likely just walk away from it all connection or no connection because of all the mixed signals and emotions it definitely will drive you crazy 😩Great topic!
❤ 🙂 Thank you!
Focus on goals not men. You can control your diet, switch jobs, improve your fitness and have loyal girlfriends but you cant control selfish, cruel narcissists. Love and support yourself..become self sufficient.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback.
Amen
I’m learning that if you have to question it , that in itself is your answer. If you have to ask chances are they don’t actually feel how you feel. Always remember ladies, if he wanted to he would
Thank you for sharing. I appreciate your feedback ❤️ 🙏
One thing I would never do which I used to do is confront the guy and ask him ""what you want from us "? or ask him why he's giving mixed signals "
Never do this all it would do is just make you feel worse .
It will make you feel like you're begging him and being desperate he's actions right now is showing you exactly who he is!!
you accept him for that, or leave him alone.
don't come from him and try and talk anything over
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Thank you for clarifying the reasons WHY men send mixed signals. Unfortunately I seem to attract those types of men for some reason which leaves me continuously frustrated. Now I’m learning through your videos, books and other sources how to break that cycle of accepting these types of behavior. I thank you. 🙏
I'm happy this has been helpful to you and I pray that you heal all you have been through 🙏
Great video. Agree with all of your points. #1 sign of mixed signal is being unavailable & inconsistent as you mentioned. Relationships are like investments if they can't give you their time & attention then what really is the point of it all. Also, if he has indecisiveness and can't make up his mind then that will also indicate the man has not matured enough to know what he wants. Love should feel free to call, free to visit, and just free to love without any drama. anything else is a time waster. Once they "quench their thirst "hopefully they will be ready to love, although I thought love was the unquenchable thirst you can never get enough of...well maybe in my book.. Thank you for the video. Blessings & peace to you now & in 2022.
Thank you very much I'm happy to hear that 🙌 blessings and peace unto you as well!
@@MeetStephanSpeaks Your welcome. Keep up the excellent work. 🙏
I think it's important to talk with each other, cause we end up hurt in the end. To where we don't speak anymore, due to a misunderstanding and miscommunication on BOTH SIDES. mistakes happen also.
This is so apt and that’s exactly the reason they avoid the conversation so that they can continue to feel good in the moment. And all this may be happening unconsciously so it’s important for the woman to use mind to make sense of the situation. Even nice guys can waste our time
Yep! Even the middle-aged older guys can be this way.😖😳
@@JusticeC-307 Guys will be guys - we must not forget that. No age, no nicety , no words -just actions are going to be the yardstick for us to know who is right for us !
Great content as always. Sounds like a man with mixed signals is simply not 100 % there.
You're absolutely right!
100% where
You’ve brought so much clarity through your platform! You have the IT factor, especially when it comes to breaking down issues and mindsets in the way people think or perceive certain scenarios pertaining to relationships. Thanks Stephan for your educated insight on relationships!
My pleasure ❤
Factzzzz
Infact this is what am passing through now,
If a man does not have the backbone to communicate openly and honestly then do NOT waste your time. Do NOT allow them to manipulate you into an emotional roller coaster ride. Cut them loose and move on. To all my sisters out there, KNOW YOUR WORTH! You deserve better.
As I listened to your dating advice and let me say also that I have four of your paperback books that are full of highlighted pages. However, I just wanted to say that I've learned from this last dating experience that if the devil wants you he will send all kinds of signals but the worst one for me is the one that plays on my emotions. God designed a woman to be emotional, caring, and compassionate, even with Jackass. But once a man senses this, this is the open door to use and mistreat. It takes a lot of mental energy to defeat the devil and his tactics. Thanks for all your dating advice and videos. I love God too much to keep playing Hell's game. Some women are so strong (Wonder Woman) strength that dealing with some men is useless. Being single is the new normal!!! At least, I'm at peace.
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
I went through this exact crap. Complete waste of time. Met this man a DATING site, we talked endlessly, he told me what a wonderful woman I was, how beautiful I was, how invaluable our "friendship" was, kissed me, went on a couple dates, and then he told me he wasn't for me. He kept telling me that I deserve a wonderful man, and he's decided to pursue an "office romance". I'm so sick of this bs. If you don't want me, leave me alone! Don't look at me, don't talk to me, don't touch me, don't bother my peace! Leave. Me. Alone. I don't even have the time of day to give you.
So annoying hun
Dang 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢 yeah why he even kissed you then?!?! If a guy did that to me, I will slap 👋 him!
Right. Just leave me alone
I’m currently going through the 2nd reason..which I appreciate him for having a high respect for a kind of woman like me and wanting to be that man that I deserve. I can tell based off the things he has going on in his life + conversations we’ve had he knows he can be the man that I deserve but he’s not ready. But he still is wanting to continue our talking stage and seeing eachother I guess while he’s getting hisself more together. In my head I’m like why did you ask me out on a date knowing all of this? Why introduce me to your family? Why try and work on a relationship with me? It’s like my feelings are so there for him regardless of his situation like you mentioned in this video. I have an attachment towards him..but it’s like the mix signals have been happening. This video came just in time like omg😅 I love getting a better perspective on this from a man’s point of view everything was so on point!!💯
LISTENNN
Same here... tired of 3 years of waiting for him to be ready for a relationship. Just told him today I'm done.
My exact truth.....it's been 2 weeks now since my partner told me that I am a great woman and amazing wife material but he is not ready ...I have not heard his voice or seen him in 2 weeks.... He will text but only wants to be friends...I am very emotional attached to him ..I'm just trying to wrap my mind around it..
That just means you're wife material BUT NOT THE WIFE FOR HIM.
This makes complete sense, thank you! ❤ When I met someone, he spoke of wanting to have a better job and have a home before he took on a relationship, but he already knew who he wanted. He would send me a message and tell me he didn't want to hurt me and I should walk away, yet we were just friends. 🤷♀️ Then, he would shower me with affection and attention after I told him I would never leave him bc him not being around me was more hurtful and would kill me. We have a crazy relationship. We are close friends, fight like a couple (1 of our mutual friends teased me about it), then make up by talking all night and end up stronger. I know he's not ready. I would just hate if he feels like he has to be more to be with me bc I'd rather reach those goals together as a couple and have even more reason to celebrate as we do. I backed off and don't spend all day with him like I used to. It hurt for him to say things that were clear to me he has feelings for me (he makes sexual remarks), but never flat out admits it. If he really has intentions of being with me, he will miss me and realize how my presence changes his day and how he feels. I actually can't shake being in love with him, but I can't wait around and can't keep letting him tug on me emotionally. He will ALWAYS be one of my closest friends though. I love him deeply and I want him happy even if it's not with me.
If that's the case, he's a terrible friend and you may want to work on those feelings.
As I see it, generally speaking, being a woman is not the easiest job in the world. It’s tough when our emotions get the best of us. I believe in those moments that is when we compromise our value, worth, and respect for the desire of true and lasting love and happiness.
Certainly, love is a battlefield. I just believe that an emotionally healed and spiritual led woman is the greatest weapon for the battlefield of all relationships. God is NOT the author of uncertainty, the devil is. Although we may not have full disclosure for the mate God has for us, he will NEVER send us someone that has uncertainty, deception, confusion, complications, etc. attached to them. Remember, discernment and wisdom are spiritual gifts from God.
Again, I believe we women lose our way in the area of selecting a romantic partner because our desires overtake us. In another video, Stephan said we should love without being afraid to lose that person. That statement was piercing!! Walking away is one of the most empowering and attractive attribute a woman/man has. It says to be in your presence demands correctness of the other person. I say this with great certainty because I know my worth. Clowns are for entertainment NOT romantic partners!!!
Funny I said that to someone, an they said you know we can never be friends, I want more than that, now 5yrs later I realise he wasn't even talking to me, it was someone else he denied being in any contact with..
You make sense with your points. Hopefully 2022 we move past this stage of trying to figure out what these men are doing 😁 and finally get settled with the man God has for me (US)❤️
Amen 🙏
Amen
One thang is for sure I have no problem being by myself for the rest of my life before I wait around for a man that seems to not know what he wants after 2 and a half years of being friends... Ive been single now Jan 21 will be 7yrs & I can gladly go on 7 more or more being single in this world we gotta enough to deal with besides a man ...Hunee please it gives me even more to put my focus on God & his soon coming ..
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
I am a woman and even I always felt I needed to meet more people so that when I finally choose the one, I won't feel like I settled.
I did it, I needed it. Now I know I'm not missing out and I appreciate the one I have fully.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback.
Going out more. Got it, thanks.
"The Man God Has for You" is a great book. I love these youtube sessions, but I love the information in the book even more. I highly recommend purchasing it.
Glad to hear that, thank you for your feedback!
Being single for over years… (actually I never had a relationship in my entire life) got me save a lot of problems that this guy mention it. It’s truly hard to find someone who really likes you. When you found the one, he gives mixed signals. Poor me.
I pray that you receive the man who is truly best for you, the man God has for you 🙏
@@MeetStephanSpeaks Amen 🙏
Stephan, I love the way you cover every angle of this issue. It is such a common dynamic. And, as always, you present the information clearly and with meaning. I especially love that you point out that addressing the mixed signal issue with the other party is an action we take to promote our own sense of clarity and PEACE! Thank you for the work you are doing! It is so important.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Thank you for sharing this video. I have been struggling with this mixed signals thing for the past 8 months and I have finally decided to move on this new year rather than keep on waiting and asking. I am the prize. I need to value myself better and do what is best for me even though its hard. I am trying to cut communication but it's been really hard for the past 4 days. 😭😭😭
You have hit the scenarios with such clarity. This was very beneficial. I appreciate these.
Thank you very much I'm happy to hear that 🙌
I was in a ‘relationship’ like this he was hot then cold, all I wanted was to know what ‘we’ are? Dating? Just friends? That was too much for him so I walked away. I’m too old for that crap lol! You want me or you don’t 🤷♀️ it’s that simple.
Maan! I swear I hold my breathe, everytime you mention an scenario!
But your informative information is very,very helpful. You have helped me heal in a healthy manner,and I am grateful. Thank You!💙
My pleasure ❤
Thanks Stephen, I’ve been feeling really low after someone I liked basically threw my feelings back in my face - but thank you for helping me understand potentially what the reason for their behaviour is and why - you’ve great smile! love your channel keep up the great work! 🙌🏽♥️
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
You're right!!! I have a lot of men friends. And they have told me in my face...
They have a lotif respect for me...that OUR friendship is worth more than 2 mins.
I appreciate that...and makes me feel great that he appreciates our friendship
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
Unrelated to the subject, this purple is absolutely your color🙂
❤ 🙂 Thank you!
Wow... this video was truly a God-send. Running through all the scenarios and mixed signals, driving myself crazy with conflicting advice going back and forth. I will address it for my own peace of mind and then release it. Thank you so much, sir! May God richly bless you!!
He only wants to be friends. He does everything for me. mowing repair items in my house.. loves my mother.. he tells me if if and when he's ready to be in a relationship I would be the one for him.. we talk and text all day talk for hours on the phone..began having benefits..once in a while .. he's not financially set to do what he wants to do..
@@carolenaedwards4633 if he's getting what he wants from you without a relationship, what reason does he have to commit to you?
@@carolenaedwards4633
My friend and i started as friends then with benefits. I enjoyed the arrangement too since I was also not sure and healing. We both kept improving ourselves separately and coming together and it grew stronger as we individually healed ourselves. He now sees us together in the future and i am a single mom empty nester. I think alot has to do with your age and station in life as to what one wants out of it.
I can stop feeling like I'm going crazy, now, and accept the Part I played... Thank you, sincerely, for the Clarity. Finally, I can continue to be Great & quit stressing...💫
Also, thanks for taking the time to try to respond to as many comments as you have the time & attention for. It's noticed. 🙂
I'm happy this has been helpful to you, don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
Stephan!. Although this comment is unrelated to this video. I just want to thank you for your consistent content, you are like the older brother I never had. I watch and rewatch all your videos. I am now more positive, happy and feminine!. I met a great man late November and he proposed in two weeks!.
We both love God and share similar values.
Our wedding is in Q1 2022.
Thank you Stephan.
God bless you.
Thank you for sharing I'm happy to hear that ❤ 🙏 🙌
I had the same scenario with this guy good guy I think we would work well together but he keeps going back-and-forth on one moment he wants to be cuddly and get to know me but he could never give me a precise answer on where he sees this going and I feel like it was wasting my time because I told him that I did not want to be involved unless it was going to lead to something serious. Thank you Stephen! This hit my situation, now I’m cordial but nothing extra!
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
He is wasting your time. Don’t give him any cookie either.
I swear I love all your videos, It pinpoints not just the man’s problems but the woman’s problem as well. And it really makes me not only understand him but understand myself in the situation , I’ve continued to noticed that i am a reflection of what I attract. I’ve attracted great men while also attracting confusing men. So what I’m trying to say is I am a great woman but I am very much young and confused and that’s just something I need to work on. If you don’t love yourself you will attract men who also don’t love themselves and most likely will not love you. Thank you for your videos 🤍
I'm happy the videos have been helpful to you, don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
Mixed signals are signals.You make the decision for them.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
Ase 😘
You’re a truly gifted communicator and coach Stephan! Thank you for sharing your gift with the world.
In asking the right questions, the ones that were forthright always won, because I was able to use my own discernment on how to move forward. Some fears creep because of what the answer may or may not be, and people don't want to be disappointed, especially if they're feeling that other person. Informative and also great video. Happy New Year..2022!
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Thanks
Good observations, Stephan! I've experienced one or a combination of these scenarios you mentioned, smh. Despite this, will give God all the glory and learn from it. Forgiveness plays a role and lots of prayer in order to free yourself from a lot of hurt. Thank you for sharing!
My pleasure ❤
Another great one!! Exactly - just cuz someone desires you, doesn't mean they value you.
You leave and find someone better 😊
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you❤️
Had that most of my life "Good girl, dont wanna hurt her". Respect to them now as since my abusive relationship i seem to attract those who think they're addicted or obsessed with me but back away after all the love bombing. Im broken man.
I'm sorry to hear about that and I pray that you heal from all that you have been through 🙏
An amazing video! That's the thing. Maybe these men do have a good heart and maybe they their intention is good, But none of that matters if they are playing games when they don't wish to build a life with you and they are destructive to you at the end. Sometimes they are toxic and end up doing more damage than good.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback.
Up down, left right, in or out, where is the confusion I believe they know exactly what they're doing and what their intentions are there's nothing mixed about the signals the seat is deceit!
I just experienced this situation. It was hard but easy to walk away bcz I know what mixed signals look like bcz of past experiences. I even warned him that I've seen this b4 but he still decided to go that route & bcz of that, I spoke my mind which let him know I'm not a knucklehead & all of a sudden, I didn't hear from him anymore. #notwastinganytime
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback.
Love this! We have to stand our ground.
Thank you, Coach! There’s always a small twist about how men behave when they are feeling their lady.
There are good men out here, and that's what matters. Women need to make sure they are ready to receive the good man that they ask for and keep that standard of a healthy and fruitful relationship.
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Feels like now as an older single mum there is no man for me. Just many men wanting sex only relationships. I'm just so sick of these men, it's hard not to internalise this rejection. I give up on love!
Don’t give up! There re a lot of good men out there, I pray you’re able to keep moving in faith 🙏 ❤️
@@MeetStephanSpeaks thank you. I was lucky enough to have a very loving relationship but unfortunately he passed away from cancer. Twenty years on I'm still grateful for the time we had. He brought me back to God, turned my life around and loved me like no one has. In that way I know I have actually been very blessed and he was God sent. I wish everyone had love in their life like that.
@@scc8728 🙏
Here here me too ..truly give up on love 💯
I feel the same way I'm a single mom in my 40s. Don't give up, I learned about manifesting and it changed my life! I have someone amazing for the first time in my life and watching MANIFEST with Jasmine changed my life! It works! Watch her videos! You have to embrace and feel and believe that person already exists and is coming to you and I did that and boom immediately met him! We've been growing strong for a year and a half now I have never been happier! I had given up from being abused all my life by narcissists. Manifesting works! It's subconscious and works by faith in yourself and what you know you deserve. Don't pay attention or give energy to circumstances or anything negative that is the secret. Keep knowing you are getting him now or whatever you want. Just watch her you have nothing to lose!
I need to be ready as well. I need to work on myself and my own healing so I can be ready to build and grow a commited, long-term relationship without losing myself.
Glad to hear that, thank you for your feedback!
I totally understand this truth. However, actions shows so much. In order to just know what we need as adults…I feel being honest and communicate is key. No mental games need to be played. 🤦🏾♀️🤣
Communication is definitely key!
Insightful video; learned some new things and now have a new perspective on certain things! About to tell him the jig is up. We are two grown, professional, intelligent people and I don't have the time, desire, or patience. This will separate the wheat from the tare.
Glad I could help!
I heard you on the point you made on FEAR. It resonates. 🙋♀️ I wouldn't have imagined fear from one person pouring into the other person and as a result losing a potentially beautiful relationship; & possibly marriage.
Healing is PRIORITY.
(And I do tend to over analyze but I've learned to SPEAK when something is bothering me. It always works. )
Obrigado Stephan 🙂❤
De nada. Healing is definitely key 🙏 ❤
@@MeetStephanSpeaks i Love that you responded in portugues😍☺
Thank you for doing this and so many of your videos for us! I have learned alot more about myself as well as trying to understand men and their intentions. You are very easy to follow and want to keep pursuing your lessons. Great job! Please keep doing your great work.
Thank you very much I will 🙏
I said this before but I use ur vids to help myself be better and figure myself out....so many guys put a bad name for me just cause I'm a guy and I hope listening to you could help me be better
Glad I could help 🙏
I think men that are insecure and dealing with trust issues often mislead women. They make statements such as I don't want to be responsible for anyone but yet they are dating and meeting new people and they want to continue sleeping with you. Like he said just because a man enjoys you, it doesn't mean they want to committ. The Flesh can get you caught up and people end up getting hurt. When they don't move to the next level then you must move out of the picture. This guy is so on point!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
I'll accept what he says that I'm not the one I will move on thank you so much for your help.
Glad I could help!
Most definitely needed this ! Right after I prayed I went on your channel and this exactly what I needed ! Thankyou so much & God Bless you 🙏🏽💕
Glad to hear that, thank you for your feedback 🙏
This has been really helpful Stephen thankyou...one thing I've learned is that we've all had some kind of trauma or situation growing up which has molded you and shaped the adult you are and we are all in this life just 'experiencing' and I think we have to have to somehow re learn, re educate ourselves on how to open those lines of communication in a healthy way not only for yourself but potentially a new partner...were all in this together and yes men are wired differently , just be natural and true to yourself around him..im still learning all the time. Which is why I've found your channel..you resonate with such genuine concern for each of us to be healthy and have happy relationships. I've learnt so much all ready as im working through your videos and im hopefully going to take on board all you've said and approach the guy thats in my life in such a way that It will either end up with me walking away or create a deeper bond between us. So watch this space lol 😁
Thanks for your coaching 🙏 ❤
My pleasure ❤️
One minute he’s telling me he wants to be with me, then the next minute he’s giving me advice to take with me if I’m not with him so I know what to look for in a man. That dude was so confusing and contradicting I told him to lose my number and blocked him. He didn’t know what he wanted and put his insecurities on me.
I must say that your videos are really insightful Stephan.
❤ ️☺️ thank you very much, I appreciate that!
@@MeetStephanSpeaks Np, I appreciate you !
Sometimes men appear equally complicated or Sometimes even more than women. I wish they were as simple as they really think. When you address the behavior that's when you get all the answers to make a decision one way or the other, no second guessing, just execute. Thanks Steph!
Thank you for watching, I appreciate your feedback ❤
address it and walk away with that peace of mind. soooo vital indeed. thank you brotha HETEP
I've been in this situationship for 2 years. I think this video will show him what he's been doing.
Ugh I’m going through this right now with a guy I’ve been talking to he’s definitely been playing games & when I call him out on his mess he tries to turn the tables on me & say that I’m being weird & the vibes are off when I’ve been consistent & he’s been inconsistent he claims he wants to fix the issues but I’m over it & over him I wish him the best but I’m all the way good I refuse to be a fool
Sis cut off and block...next!
@@joanjones3677 Period 💯💯💯
Kanesha, I understand exactly what you are going through. As a young senior citizen who would like to be in a relationship, old men, near the grave have the nerve to play Stupid Games. I have stated to nicely tell them, I want a relationship, but I Do Not Need You or A Relationship. I am Protecting My Heart and My Body from their Foolishness. I just have to keep it moving. Let 1 person know you are trying out the Relationship. That way, it is easier to Toss That Junk in The Trash if it turns out to be trash. Tell him why you are no longer interested in him, maybe he will learn something for the next person. But, he will not be able to Play You... Real Talk. Yada Yada. I am a Black Woman. Yada Yada Thanks Stephen for your Insightful, Valuable Information....
@@andreatownes988 Preach I receive this
Hey @meetstephanspeaks - I had prayed to God for an understanding about a situation and you popped up. You know the Word of God asks us to have compassion and understanding and love and no judgement for our fellow human beings and if I would have heard this 2-3 years ago, I would have just been still angry. But now, it helps me understand this one person and I am going to leave it to God, because after all, it’s his plan over mine. But to heal, I needed to understand him and this helps. God answered my prayer and I am so happy to see you are a believer and I love how you respond to everyone❤ God bless you my friend!
This needs a companion video for men...do this INSTEAD of sending mixed signals 😊
Great suggestion, I will add it to my list to get it done!