Friendship and the impact of loneliness is such a painful topic. Although I have a fantastic friendship group now there was periods of my life when I didn’t. You really feel like you are only living a half life and feel ashamed as if your lack of friends is because there is something wrong or lacking with you. This video should help a lot of people going through this at the moment. Although its as common problem people don’t talk about it enough. Well done on speaking up!!
Wow you’re spot on with that 😨 It’s definitely like living a half life and so many times I’ve thought there was something wrong with me 😭 thank you so much, I really appreciate this comment!
Turning 24 next year and didnt take enough risk ,playing safe and staying in a place that made me harm got me a lot of health issues and wasted time literally .Do not stay in a stressful environment or you Will get sick like me and waste time
Im only 18 and feel the exact same way you described here about the last 2-3 years. I just feel terrible about staying in my room with some sadness, depression some times lonely, while my classmates were going out and having fun. Gonna try to change it now and hopefully reduce this horrible feeling of regret.
You're still very young. People realize this after they have wasted a lot of their 20s. Get you live together, set up a schudel, wake up early, work out, eat well, study, find a job, socialize, go out there man
Oh my god I wish I could go back to being 18, or 19. I'm 23 now and I feel like I've completely skipped that part of my life, it's definitely not too late for you.
@@lewisnorth1188 not too late for you either. I’m 38 and would give anything to be 23 again. Seriously, you will BLINK and suddenly you’re pushing 40. So please just enjoy what’s still ahead of you.
"Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it's only good for wallowing in." - Katherine Mansfield
I'm the same but with dating people! I am in my early 30s and NEVER had a romantic relationship with anyone! Due to being really ocd when I was younger, and lots of anxieties etc I wouldn't let anyone near me - and I've had therapy for it since last year but it now it feels like an impossible thing to get over! I feel like I missed out on the "normal" dating years that young people go through, and now I'm too old to begin it and inexperienced etc - it's horrible! I was bullied really badly at school so always felt "abnormal" and my whole life since has been spent trying to become like everyone else - I have lots of friends now but the dating side is the one thing that's missing and I feel like I'll never be able to achieve it :( Thanks for uploading your video it's really brave and helps a lot of people xxx
Hey man I’m 25 and had social anxiety since 20 . Because of bullying too. The best way I can say to help is to find a hobby and a good non judge mental friend and talk to 5 people that you don’t know a day. Say “hey how are you doing?” And go from there and talk about what’s around sometimes or how you feel About something helps. Sometimes I connect and the person tells me something I can relate to with them. Before my anxiety seeing them I wouldn’t know at all. For girls to get over that is to learn to talk to them like a person and approach at least 3 a day. Eventually it will be so causal. The more you do it the less afraid you will be. Just have to put yourself in uncomfortable situations for awhile. And eventually you will be like the diamond you already are that was just in the coal of anxiety barrier.
I literally feel same. I’m 25, I’m struggling with ocd since I was 10, I’ve never had bf bcuz of it, now my friends start marrying and I don’t even now how to talk to with a man. This scares me a lot. My heart hurts even when i only think about it and future. I really don’t know what to do anymore bcuz I live in such a judgemental country, I feel like I’m late for everything
Omg I'm so happy I stumbled across your video right now. 25 and feeling like I have missed out on a lot during my teens and early 20s... I really loved your mindset of "That I missed out on things in life, actually just makes me appreciate those things more when they eventually happen". I'll start to see it that way for sure. Thank you
Im a 26 year old female from Pakistan and i totally relate with this. I never went to university because of financial struggles/family troubles. I come from a broken family and have dealt with deep loneliness/heartbreak and a few shitty friends. I get this sense that i never truly got to experience my 20s the way i wanted. Mainly because i didnt have the privilege or time as i had to work 24/7 to survive and support my family. Im in a better place now financially/career wise although not fully there yet. I look at my bucket list often and dream of the day ill finally be able to travel abroad and live my life instead of being alone in my room working all the time. Its tough to keep pushing forward at times but here i am 💪 i will make it someday and hopefully experience the same kind of gratitude as you have described
I experienced A LOT of things 18-25. HOWEVER, a lot of those were less than pleasant experiences I could have done without, around people I couldn't trust and felt lonely, even though I was around others. Made a lot of mistakes. I stayed around a lot of these people because I didn't want to be alone, but it back fired. I can now say that I have friends now that I can really trust and be myself around and I have so much more appreciation for people now than I ever had in the past. Everyone's path is different and I'm glad you have found people who you can share with in real time. You are loved =) x
Wow, thank you so much for sharing Rebecca 🥺 I can only imagine how difficult that was to be around people like that. I'm so glad you've found friends who enrich your life now. Appreciation for those people is everything, I can totally agree. Thank you ❤️
@@KateEveling Yes, it has impacted my life in such a positive way, I feel valued and cared for by others now. Glad you have lovely people in your life too. And I appreciate so much around me now, which only brings more of the good stuff into my life. Thanks for commenting back =) Peace
I hear you but you still have the luxury of experience whether good or bad. It’s easy to say to others that chocolate cake is good or terrible when you’ve actually tried it whereas they may haven’t. Or it’s easy to say “You wouldn’t like Italy as it’s boring.” when you got the opportunity to travel to Italy and those others haven’t. If someone told me that I’d say thanks for the run down but I want to see Italy for myself and determine whether it’s boring or not. I may like it! Who knows. Point being is that I think we should be very careful in projecting our own experiences and narratives onto other people and essentially shaming them, intentionally or unintentionally, into a state of being we think they should be in based on our own perspective and experiences. That’s not cool nor fair. I think that’s where much of the contempt comes from. It comes off as malevolent and elitist.
Also, I believe people have deee will and are not predestined to a path. We can choose what we want to do whether good or bad. I think the predestination thing is a means of psychologically hindering oneself as well as others and can even be used as an excuse not to strive to do anything.
Made no friends at university either. I've got to be honest here, it is difficult to imagine how a stereotypically attractive, upper middle-class, well-spoken young woman could fail to make friends, at least not based on hostility or indifference from others.
I'm turning 28 this year and I did what you're "supposed" to do. Went to uni, partied a lot, met a lot of people but only a few really good friends but I still felt lonely sometimes and still do. My CF got worse the last year at uni (2015) and now I'm done with school and I'm unable to work due to my health. And it's superhard to find new friends. Where do I even begin to look? So even if you do follow "the right path" you can still end up wishing that you had friends that you can go on holidays with. ❤️
@@totallyanonymousbish9599 cause you're just barely in ur 20's. Just stay at home, chill, and be humble. Don't worry about yourself or anything, get a job if u don't have one, and everything else will follow through. Exercise too.
I'm 42 now and I've really missed everything that makes up life. Never been in love, never really partyed, never travelled, no friends to rely on, depression since I was 17-18 to this day..... life has passed me by. And today, even if I do have a good day (which is rare enough), just a thought or reminder of all that I missed is enough to put an end to the good mood. Now all I want is to just fall asleep, have a nice dream, and never wake up again. The sad truth is: Many things have their time and when it's over you can never catch up. I mean how sad it is to see a 45 year old in a disco trying desperately to party with 20 year olds. In the end, the things you don't do are the things you regret the most.
i’m 27 and slowly changing my lifestyle. i start doing what i’ve really wanted even though it’s too late, maybe, i keep doing. buying what i want ( by setting a budget on that, money management is important too), playing with makeup, wearing pretty clothes, having fun on weekends. i’m finally letting people get to know me though it’s hard. i wish all of us could lead a happy life, enjoy this life!
I'm just reading the description and i'm already bout to cry. I'm about to be 30 in 3 months and it's so much I wish I could have done. I have been feeling the same emotions but I guess scared to believe that this is the reality and I'm just telling myself to keep going cause I can do it all in my 30's because I'm still alive. Which is a blessing in itself.
You are so cute kate! Your deep appreciation is so precious. I wish you such happiness. Thanks for sharing your experiences, joys, and struggles, and advice. I've been feeling like i missed out lately, but i know i have sooo much more to be grateful for, and i know there are many joys ahead. Either way, your experience has been uplifitng and soothing. I'm sure anything i've missed out on will also make me appreciate it more.
Oh god, I'm 23 and this exact thought has been taking over my life for the last few days, you've perfectly put into words what I'm feeling and it's so nice to feel like I'm not alone in feeling like this, so thank you for making the video.
30 felt a lot like 29. 33 and 34 were actually pretty good years. Looking back, I enjoy that once I am in my 30's, I seriously do not care what others think anymore. All that quirkiness can come out in all forms with no shame 🤗 Wow that plant growing metaphor got deep! I like to think how trees reach for the sky, but also keep their roots firmly planted in the ground. They have the perfect balance.
Turning 20 this year and I feel like I've wasted my teenage years. Turning 20 gives me major anxiety because it means I'm not a teenager anymore and I'm turning into an adult, even though I've been a legal adult since 18 lmao. I know that it's so arbitrary and I know that I've got plenty of experiences ahead of me. Age doesn't mean anything when it comes to achieving your dreams or living life... As a society we need to stop pretending like life stops at 30. I'm carving my own path and that's enough for me
i turned 30 this year, i had this same thought when i was 27, i havnt had a friend since i was 15, so i understand,thank you for this video you've really made me cry and i see you feel the pain i feel,helped me feel like its not just me, you seem like a really nice person
Feel that. I grew up in a broken home and it never got better. I'm 24 yet got the life experience of a 45 year old. I had God game. I had an excellent social life. I was well liked. Well respected. Any girl I wanted I got. Past 4 years my mental health really hit the fan and I lost everything. I miss women. I miss having friends. I miss remembering what it was like to be normal. As I type this I can hear the music blasting at the club nearby I keep feeling like I'm missing out not being there. Yet I know its of no use. Anytime a girl looks in my eyes nowadays she gets a look of extreme fear. I'd be delusional to be social nowadays. Its no use.
I’ve just recently subscribed to your channel. The commonality being that my son, Alex, has cystic fibrosis. He turned 28 this year!! He’s expressed the same sentiments about his own life journey. He spent his teen years and early 20’s believing his life would be over by now due to his disease. He’s suffering not only resides in the physical symptoms of CF but almost equally with the mental:emotional health component. He’s finally gotten to a place where he’s accepted that his life is so much more than having CF. He’s such an empathetic beautiful soul. I tell him he’s my hero😍 I’m glad you have a place to express yourself. I look forward to watching your videos.
Thank you Melissa, I appreciate that!! I’m so happy to hear he has accepted his life is more than CF, that’s when the magic happens! I hope he is keeping well and I hope you are too 🥰
I’m 34 and I’m going through that now. Everyday I’m like “how did I get here? how did my life end up like this?”. I went to university straight from high school and although I had friends, I never went on holiday or anything. Instead I lived at home and studied (was studying chemistry, so it was hard). Ended up switching to biology just to graduate, became severely depressed, went through some tragedies after college, and now I’m 34, work at home as a web developer, and my elderly dad lives with me. I live in a town an hour away from the town I lived and grew up in. The only friend I have is now married and we only chat via discord. I don’t feel like I’ll ever live the lif e that I want, and that’s quite sad. Ah well, there’s always video games. :*(
I'm 27 and I already feel like I've ruined my life by not trying hard enough to live the life I want. Now Im studying something I didnt actually want to study but chose to because of fear. I didnt experience much at all in my twenties until now and was always in my room. Now I have to learn so much everyday that I dont even have time anymore. I dont know if I can still come out of this in time and to be honest I dont even think I actually want to try. It feels like I wasted all of my potential that only means something when you're young and that is not bearable.
You are a lovely woman with a heart full of love. You deserve to be happy and loved. I’m glad to hear you are growing your circle of friends. Life is good.
I’m gonna be 20 this year. Don’t have friends, I don’t think love is for me. Dropped out of high school in 10th grade. Almost done with my ged. I never thought I’d go places or do things other than work. I’m also in foster care. But that’s gonna end when I turn 21. Getting an apartment is scary when it first hits you. But it’s really no different than how lonely it always is. Feels like I’m going to miss out on the excitement of life. Or that I’ve already missed so much because I’m always in the room. Too scared to let people get close. It’s better to be the person who abandons everyone. Than to be the person who gets abandoned. I thought, if I got rid of the idea of wanting people around. Maybe I’d just accept it. But it never sinks in. I always imagined the best friendships or relationships, we’re the ones where you grew up knowing each other. You got to grow with the person. It’s a different bond. But life doesn’t always work out the way you think. There’s no one here😂. I guess I’m waiting for the day I can buy alcohol,and no one can tell me shit about it. Just get black out drunk everyday. Wouldn’t be such a bad life.
I'm 41 now and I've really missed everything in life. The friends became less and less until in the end I was standing there alone. When I look into the future I only see a huge black hole. I wish I could go back 20 years I would do everything differently, or put an end to everything. Both would be better than the here and now.
hey hope you are doing fine. im 19 and i simply wasted all my teenage years. i just feel so empty and I m trying to change my situation. what would you do differently? thanks a lot ❤
@@johndegrasse7503 Seize every opportunity for happiness, however small and insignificant it may be. It's better to make a mistake than to do nothing. There is no perfect time for anything, waiting for it is the mistake you end up regretting the most. time flows on and doesn't care about anyone, it's up to you to make something out of it. At 19 you still have everything ahead of you. there is a quote from ds9 "Savor the fruit of life, my young friends. It has a sweet taste when it is fresh from the vine. But don't live too long. The taste turns bitter... after a time." Only I would change the word "live" for "wait". Recently someone said something to me that really comforted me, maybe it will help you too. "Free is he who recognizes that what could have been is never what would have been."
I can really relate to this. I have had no friends for years upon years, I was stuck by parents house not being able to escape having over-caring parents and always felt trapped. I always wished for things to be different and always wanted a life, I wanted a job, something I could do instead of playing the same damn game everyday on my PC. I'm 27 as well. I know it's a horrid feeling of feeling lonely and not being able to go anywhere except out to town eventually when I was allowed out the house, I went to town at 21 or so for the first time :(
I’m going through the same thing. I used to work 60-70 hour weeks as a construction working and saving up to move out of my parents house. Once I got enough money saved, I lost most of it due to my medical bills/shitty insurance (knee injuries/concussions) and legal costs for an attorney. Now I have been unemployed since 2020 and live off SSI and SSD. My mom is very overbearing and won’t let me get another job or anything that can make me extra money. I’m back in school studying computer science; but I won’t have enough money to move out until I’m 30. Now I’m 24, I never had a gf, have no friends, lost all my hair in 3 months (might be from COVID) and I’m a loser. I want some fun experiences but the only good experience was losing my virginity (a few months ago) I try to be proactive by exercising and studying languages. Plus video games and pot helps
@@trowwzers5057 That sucks man. I've lost alot of money due to parents but won't go into detail. It's annoyed me alot. I'm stuck at my mums with a contracted number of hours and not allowed anymore hours, I need a better job than where I am.
When I was 21 my mother cut her throat open with a knife and I found her dead. My family did not help me at all . I finished college but my one romantic relationship fell apart by 24. I had a career and I was a drug addict and alcoholic by nicht. When the lockdown happened I drank myself homeless and lost everything. Now I just turned 30 and I have to start all of life over now that im sobered up and at least living in a rented RV. Everyday i daydream of death. It is very hard looking back on my 20s at who I was at 20 and who I've become, and the toll that my lifestyle took on my body and all the nights of loneliness and wanting to die. Now fixing my life in the face of the world falling apart all alone in Texas. Doing my best to make friends. So many people are shut down.
At 27 I had a major breakdown episode feeling the same way like I’d wasted my life, hadn’t done anything and missed out on experiences I should’ve gotten that notice everyone else getting. This from being antisocial and depressed closing myself off as a result of being abused as a child and feeling lost and always sad. Now I’m 38, still struggling with it and would give anything to be 27 again because grand scheme wise it’s extremely young. I’m constantly stuck in this hindsight seeing what I should have done different cycle and it’s a living hell. The real sucky thing is I was a good looking with great physical genes 20 something guy and probably could’ve had an abundance of these great experiences if I could’ve just gotten out of my own way. It’s a gut wrenching feeling knowing you completely squandered you’re prime and now it’s gone and you’ll never get it again
Wow ive experienced the same frustration. I have autism and struggled with initiative and social ability to be able to access and know what is out there in the community i live in. I felt imprisoned at home alot seeing people on social media with friends looking like having fun. I now know how to find people near my age with same interests by being aware of the places i can go to meet them like open mic nights. I feel so much loss and upset i had to feel lonely and cut off.
Missed out My early 20s and late teens...sacrificed my desires for others...now I am in late 20s..I regret that I missed out my teen and young life trying to be in a way that others want...this is one of the biggest mistake i have made
I wasted a few years of my life drinking and now I focus on books, literature and artwork. It's the only time I'm happy. My 5 favorite Amazon purchases: - Icon by Frank Frazetta - Scream of Eagles by Robert Wilcox - The Joy of Art by Carolyn Schram - 7x7x7 SpeedCube (rubic's cube) - Great Fighter Jets of the Galaxy 1 by Tim Gibson
I’m 19 and I smoke cigarettes, drink every night, and work a backbreaking oilfield job and have 1 good friend that I rarely see, I always think about going back to high school and doing everything different, but no matter what you never can, I wish I could go to college parties and blow a bunch of money on fun but I never will because I got so many bills I barely make enough to save but this is life I chose to live and I wouldn’t trade it for anything else I know all them rich kids partying every day and spending their parents money aren’t gonna have half the knowledge people like me will in 20 years. But it does sound like a lot of fun having no sense of responsibility or consequences.
Hello Everyone! I just want to let you all know that life is one long day and that we are all going to die. Perfect/wasted/not a minute wasted life,etc - so just take it easy and have goals and spend time with your loved ones and make memories with them and stay hydrated and eat real food XO
Kate I am Ollie I am now 53 I feel the same way about my 30 or so I met a young lady bought a house with her was with her for seven years only to find out that she had been seeing a old school boyfriend behind my back . And this was a person who I thought I would start a family with. Which hurt me alot if I am honest. Not had a few good years of late at one point when COVID had just started I found myself without a home was sleeping in car for a bit . Then this last year my mum died of cancer which was hard but I am glad I was with her in the hospice till the end . It all hurts alot .😢 I know pain only to well
I’m so sorry to hear that 🥺 sounds like you’ve really been through it. I really hope things can ease for you and it starts to get better soon. Look after yourself, sending strength and light your way 🧡
Social media over-exaggerates the amount of “living” the average person actually does. Plus, all that stuff gets expensive. Most these people are the best off financially tbh.
Im 49 and was a chronic drinker and misdiagnosed thyroid and celiac patient for years. I know all about missing life. I was sick and medicating myself for 25 years . Sad 😔
Same age. I left my abusive family at 18 and have been in and out of hostels, temporary accommodations, been on 1 date at 18 and have became a depressed recluse after college finished. I’m stuck in the benefits system as I am in temporary accommodation and the rent is ridiculous e.g I take home £1000 and my rent will be £800 so either way I’m stuck on benefits. I have no real support. I feel like my childhood shaped my now and I’m trying to live
Life expectancy is not skyrocketing though. It's roughly the same as it's ever been, saving from death at birth, infections (thanks to antibiotics and penicilin) etc. The average person can expect to live to around 80, increased if you are lucky.
You can't change what's written we believe that too. But you can change what you do and change your life and it will change then what is written so for some it's hard we let bad things take over we should let positive things take over. I'm mentally very tired it's so difficult I want to just say like right I'm going out getting up in the morning going to my best job I can't do it and I need to work on this some how
What i really want is to travel to UK, meet famous people before they go. I have so many dreams and yet there are times I feel behind in life and im only 28. I could have met Stan Lee and now he's gone. There are once-in-a-lifetime opportunities youre never going to get and you reap what you sow in the end. Whoever said "good things come to those who wait" should just f off
But what would you suggest to your past self ? For those of currently without people .. we don’t know what’s around the corner, yes, but what to do in the meantime so we can still feel fulfilled & not regret the time passing by now ?
your really good how you explain i luv ur RUclips channel I agree I get jealous too, and I wonder why I'm this way. They only person I try and trust now is God hes my only help on life I don't like to ask for things but I believe in miracles when you are a right person and havent harmed others but others harm you. when you have any form of ill health it's takes a toll on general life. I find that I can't move forward from my life I stay on a bed all day I don't speak to no or go anywhere I feel angry with food tea and nothing interested me my legs hurt I get disturbed I feel my life is wasting I want to achieve my goals but that seems far away as you need money to do everything and I can't afford stuff so I do free things like help with volunteering for a charity get free classes to use a computer and this is life I feel helpless because I need a job I was so strong and enthusiastic and happy with lots of energy now I don't. huge difference and I need help to just get the way I was and I want to just live that's it I also appreciate everything although I have nothing. Your so beautiful keep doing videos Thank you for sharing really enjoyed this beautiful video Thank you
I'm 49 imagine how the fuck I feel🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 I feel like I missed the boat life passing me by all my cousins friends married with kids grown now they are parents. Me??? Nothing but hardship upon hardship in bitter than a bag of lemons Jesus blessed me with Lemon Popsicles. Thought I had a God!!!
Friendship and the impact of loneliness is such a painful topic. Although I have a fantastic friendship group now there was periods of my life when I didn’t. You really feel like you are only living a half life and feel ashamed as if your lack of friends is because there is something wrong or lacking with you. This video should help a lot of people going through this at the moment. Although its as common problem people don’t talk about it enough. Well done on speaking up!!
Wow you’re spot on with that 😨 It’s definitely like living a half life and so many times I’ve thought there was something wrong with me 😭 thank you so much, I really appreciate this comment!
I am 23 and I feel like I missed out. No friends or love. Just work
Turning 24 next year and didnt take enough risk ,playing safe and staying in a place that made me harm got me a lot of health issues and wasted time literally .Do not stay in a stressful environment or you Will get sick like me and waste time
@@incelproud2670 Late 20's and 30s is still young adulthood, you idiot. Whatever a 23 year old can do, a 29 year old can do as well.
Im only 18 and feel the exact same way you described here about the last 2-3 years. I just feel terrible about staying in my room with some sadness, depression some times lonely, while my classmates were going out and having fun. Gonna try to change it now and hopefully reduce this horrible feeling of regret.
You're still very young. People realize this after they have wasted a lot of their 20s. Get you live together, set up a schudel, wake up early, work out, eat well, study, find a job, socialize, go out there man
Oh my god I wish I could go back to being 18, or 19. I'm 23 now and I feel like I've completely skipped that part of my life, it's definitely not too late for you.
@@lewisnorth1188 not too late for you either. I’m 38 and would give anything to be 23 again. Seriously, you will BLINK and suddenly you’re pushing 40. So please just enjoy what’s still ahead of you.
"Make it a rule of life never to regret and never to look back. Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it's only good for wallowing in."
- Katherine Mansfield
Absolutely true! It’s hard to do that sometimes, let go of the things I wish I had had... but I do agree, it only makes things worse.
I'm the same but with dating people! I am in my early 30s and NEVER had a romantic relationship with anyone! Due to being really ocd when I was younger, and lots of anxieties etc I wouldn't let anyone near me - and I've had therapy for it since last year but it now it feels like an impossible thing to get over! I feel like I missed out on the "normal" dating years that young people go through, and now I'm too old to begin it and inexperienced etc - it's horrible! I was bullied really badly at school so always felt "abnormal" and my whole life since has been spent trying to become like everyone else - I have lots of friends now but the dating side is the one thing that's missing and I feel like I'll never be able to achieve it :( Thanks for uploading your video it's really brave and helps a lot of people xxx
Hey man I’m 25 and had social anxiety since 20 . Because of bullying too. The best way I can say to help is to find a hobby and a good non judge mental friend and talk to 5 people that you don’t know a day. Say “hey how are you doing?” And go from there and talk about what’s around sometimes or how you feel
About something helps. Sometimes I connect and the person tells me something I can relate to with them. Before my anxiety seeing them I wouldn’t know at all. For girls to get over that is to learn to talk to them like a person and approach at least 3 a day. Eventually it will be so causal. The more you do it the less afraid you will be. Just have to put yourself in uncomfortable situations for awhile. And eventually you will be like the diamond you already are that was just in the coal of anxiety barrier.
Your not to old. Dating sucks at all ages. Everyone makes mistakes, people say the wrong thing. 30 isn't old . You'll be fine.
I literally feel same. I’m 25, I’m struggling with ocd since I was 10, I’ve never had bf bcuz of it, now my friends start marrying and I don’t even now how to talk to with a man. This scares me a lot. My heart hurts even when i only think about it and future. I really don’t know what to do anymore bcuz I live in such a judgemental country, I feel like I’m late for everything
@@yaoike2449 Hi 😏
Omg I'm so happy I stumbled across your video right now. 25 and feeling like I have missed out on a lot during my teens and early 20s... I really loved your mindset of "That I missed out on things in life, actually just makes me appreciate those things more when they eventually happen". I'll start to see it that way for sure. Thank you
Im a 26 year old female from Pakistan and i totally relate with this. I never went to university because of financial struggles/family troubles. I come from a broken family and have dealt with deep loneliness/heartbreak and a few shitty friends. I get this sense that i never truly got to experience my 20s the way i wanted. Mainly because i didnt have the privilege or time as i had to work 24/7 to survive and support my family. Im in a better place now financially/career wise although not fully there yet. I look at my bucket list often and dream of the day ill finally be able to travel abroad and live my life instead of being alone in my room working all the time. Its tough to keep pushing forward at times but here i am 💪 i will make it someday and hopefully experience the same kind of gratitude as you have described
I experienced A LOT of things 18-25. HOWEVER, a lot of those were less than pleasant experiences I could have done without, around people I couldn't trust and felt lonely, even though I was around others. Made a lot of mistakes. I stayed around a lot of these people because I didn't want to be alone, but it back fired. I can now say that I have friends now that I can really trust and be myself around and I have so much more appreciation for people now than I ever had in the past. Everyone's path is different and I'm glad you have found people who you can share with in real time. You are loved =) x
Wow, thank you so much for sharing Rebecca 🥺 I can only imagine how difficult that was to be around people like that. I'm so glad you've found friends who enrich your life now. Appreciation for those people is everything, I can totally agree. Thank you ❤️
@@KateEveling Yes, it has impacted my life in such a positive way, I feel valued and cared for by others now. Glad you have lovely people in your life too. And I appreciate so much around me now, which only brings more of the good stuff into my life. Thanks for commenting back =) Peace
I hear you but you still have the luxury of experience whether good or bad. It’s easy to say to others that chocolate cake is good or terrible when you’ve actually tried it whereas they may haven’t. Or it’s easy to say “You wouldn’t like Italy as it’s boring.” when you got the opportunity to travel to Italy and those others haven’t. If someone told me that I’d say thanks for the run down but I want to see Italy for myself and determine whether it’s boring or not. I may like it! Who knows. Point being is that I think we should be very careful in projecting our own experiences and narratives onto other people and essentially shaming them, intentionally or unintentionally, into a state of being we think they should be in based on our own perspective and experiences. That’s not cool nor fair. I think that’s where much of the contempt comes from. It comes off as malevolent and elitist.
Also, I believe people have deee will and are not predestined to a path. We can choose what we want to do whether good or bad. I think the predestination thing is a means of psychologically hindering oneself as well as others and can even be used as an excuse not to strive to do anything.
*free will…
Made no friends at university either. I've got to be honest here, it is difficult to imagine how a stereotypically attractive, upper middle-class, well-spoken young woman could fail to make friends, at least not based on hostility or indifference from others.
Same as here, it's so easy to overlook someone who looks alright.
I'm turning 28 this year and I did what you're "supposed" to do. Went to uni, partied a lot, met a lot of people but only a few really good friends but I still felt lonely sometimes and still do. My CF got worse the last year at uni (2015) and now I'm done with school and I'm unable to work due to my health. And it's superhard to find new friends. Where do I even begin to look? So even if you do follow "the right path" you can still end up wishing that you had friends that you can go on holidays with. ❤️
I'm 23, living at home and still strive for these things
@@totallyanonymousbish9599 cause you're just barely in ur 20's. Just stay at home, chill, and be humble. Don't worry about yourself or anything, get a job if u don't have one, and everything else will follow through. Exercise too.
@@christianaquino5230 Age =/= life stage. Anything a 23 year old can do, a 29 year old can do as well. 29 is also a young adult!
I'm 42 now and I've really missed everything that makes up life. Never been in love, never really partyed, never travelled, no friends to rely on, depression since I was 17-18 to this day.....
life has passed me by. And today, even if I do have a good day (which is rare enough), just a thought or reminder of all that I missed is enough to put an end to the good mood.
Now all I want is to just fall asleep, have a nice dream, and never wake up again.
The sad truth is: Many things have their time and when it's over you can never catch up. I mean how sad it is to see a 45 year old in a disco trying desperately to party with 20 year olds.
In the end, the things you don't do are the things you regret the most.
I dont think its ever to late. I'd love to dance with you at a disco
thank you for the encouragement. But I just don't have the energy left to believe it.
who knows maybe in the next life.@@jostsaayman1994
i’m 27 and slowly changing my lifestyle. i start doing what i’ve really wanted even though it’s too late, maybe, i keep doing. buying what i want ( by setting a budget on that, money management is important too), playing with makeup, wearing pretty clothes, having fun on weekends. i’m finally letting people get to know me though it’s hard. i wish all of us could lead a happy life, enjoy this life!
I'm just reading the description and i'm already bout to cry. I'm about to be 30 in 3 months and it's so much I wish I could have done. I have been feeling the same emotions but I guess scared to believe that this is the reality and I'm just telling myself to keep going cause I can do it all in my 30's because I'm still alive. Which is a blessing in itself.
You are so cute kate! Your deep appreciation is so precious. I wish you such happiness. Thanks for sharing your experiences, joys, and struggles, and advice. I've been feeling like i missed out lately, but i know i have sooo much more to be grateful for, and i know there are many joys ahead. Either way, your experience has been uplifitng and soothing. I'm sure anything i've missed out on will also make me appreciate it more.
Oh god, I'm 23 and this exact thought has been taking over my life for the last few days, you've perfectly put into words what I'm feeling and it's so nice to feel like I'm not alone in feeling like this, so thank you for making the video.
Fellow 23 year old here and feel the same! You aren't alone 🥲❤️
Needed to hear this today. Thank you so much!!
Sending you a big hug young lady . We all need a hug some days .
30 felt a lot like 29. 33 and 34 were actually pretty good years. Looking back, I enjoy that once I am in my 30's, I seriously do not care what others think anymore. All that quirkiness can come out in all forms with no shame 🤗
Wow that plant growing metaphor got deep! I like to think how trees reach for the sky, but also keep their roots firmly planted in the ground. They have the perfect balance.
Turning 20 this year and I feel like I've wasted my teenage years. Turning 20 gives me major anxiety because it means I'm not a teenager anymore and I'm turning into an adult, even though I've been a legal adult since 18 lmao. I know that it's so arbitrary and I know that I've got plenty of experiences ahead of me. Age doesn't mean anything when it comes to achieving your dreams or living life... As a society we need to stop pretending like life stops at 30. I'm carving my own path and that's enough for me
Society here in my country u r fucking dead if u dont get married at 25💀💀💀💀
i turned 30 this year, i had this same thought when i was 27, i havnt had a friend since i was 15, so i understand,thank you for this video you've really made me cry and i see you feel the pain i feel,helped me feel like its not just me, you seem like a really nice person
Feel that. I grew up in a broken home and it never got better. I'm 24 yet got the life experience of a 45 year old. I had God game. I had an excellent social life. I was well liked. Well respected. Any girl I wanted I got. Past 4 years my mental health really hit the fan and I lost everything. I miss women. I miss having friends. I miss remembering what it was like to be normal. As I type this I can hear the music blasting at the club nearby I keep feeling like I'm missing out not being there. Yet I know its of no use. Anytime a girl looks in my eyes nowadays she gets a look of extreme fear. I'd be delusional to be social nowadays. Its no use.
I’ve just recently subscribed to your channel. The commonality being that my son, Alex, has cystic fibrosis. He turned 28 this year!! He’s expressed the same sentiments about his own life journey. He spent his teen years and early 20’s believing his life would be over by now due to his disease. He’s suffering not only resides in the physical symptoms of CF but almost equally with the mental:emotional health component. He’s finally gotten to a place where he’s accepted that his life is so much more than having CF. He’s such an empathetic beautiful soul. I tell him he’s my hero😍 I’m glad you have a place to express yourself. I look forward to watching your videos.
Thank you Melissa, I appreciate that!! I’m so happy to hear he has accepted his life is more than CF, that’s when the magic happens! I hope he is keeping well and I hope you are too 🥰
I’m 34 and I’m going through that now. Everyday I’m like “how did I get here? how did my life end up like this?”. I went to university straight from high school and although I had friends, I never went on holiday or anything. Instead I lived at home and studied (was studying chemistry, so it was hard). Ended up switching to biology just to graduate, became severely depressed, went through some tragedies after college, and now I’m 34, work at home as a web developer, and my elderly dad lives with me. I live in a town an hour away from the town I lived and grew up in. The only friend I have is now married and we only chat via discord. I don’t feel like I’ll ever live the lif e that I want, and that’s quite sad. Ah well, there’s always video games. :*(
I'm 27 and I already feel like I've ruined my life by not trying hard enough to live the life I want. Now Im studying something I didnt actually want to study but chose to because of fear. I didnt experience much at all in my twenties until now and was always in my room. Now I have to learn so much everyday that I dont even have time anymore. I dont know if I can still come out of this in time and to be honest I dont even think I actually want to try. It feels like I wasted all of my potential that only means something when you're young and that is not bearable.
Thinking about how grateful I'll be when things finally get better is actually really encouraging :) 🖤
How old are you?
You are a lovely woman with a heart full of love. You deserve to be happy and loved. I’m glad to hear you are growing your circle of friends. Life is good.
Aww thank you so much 🥺💖
I’m gonna be 20 this year. Don’t have friends, I don’t think love is for me. Dropped out of high school in 10th grade. Almost done with my ged. I never thought I’d go places or do things other than work. I’m also in foster care. But that’s gonna end when I turn 21. Getting an apartment is scary when it first hits you. But it’s really no different than how lonely it always is. Feels like I’m going to miss out on the excitement of life. Or that I’ve already missed so much because I’m always in the room. Too scared to let people get close. It’s better to be the person who abandons everyone. Than to be the person who gets abandoned. I thought, if I got rid of the idea of wanting people around. Maybe I’d just accept it. But it never sinks in. I always imagined the best friendships or relationships, we’re the ones where you grew up knowing each other. You got to grow with the person. It’s a different bond. But life doesn’t always work out the way you think. There’s no one here😂. I guess I’m waiting for the day I can buy alcohol,and no one can tell me shit about it. Just get black out drunk everyday. Wouldn’t be such a bad life.
I'm 41 now and I've really missed everything in life. The friends became less and less until in the end I was standing there alone. When I look into the future I only see a huge black hole. I wish I could go back 20 years I would do everything differently, or put an end to everything. Both would be better than the here and now.
hey hope you are doing fine. im 19 and i simply wasted all my teenage years. i just feel so empty and I m trying to change my situation. what would you do differently? thanks a lot ❤
@@johndegrasse7503
Seize every opportunity for happiness, however small and insignificant it may be. It's better to make a mistake than to do nothing. There is no perfect time for anything, waiting for it is the mistake you end up regretting the most. time flows on and doesn't care about anyone, it's up to you to make something out of it.
At 19 you still have everything ahead of you.
there is a quote from ds9
"Savor the fruit of life, my young friends. It has a sweet taste when it is fresh from the vine. But don't live too long. The taste turns bitter... after a time."
Only I would change the word "live" for "wait".
Recently someone said something to me that really comforted me, maybe it will help you too.
"Free is he who recognizes that what could have been is never what would have been."
@@okarinus2000 thank you so much. love this answer
I am 28 and I feel like I have wasted my 20s...
27 same
27 almost 28. Me too.
I can really relate to this. I have had no friends for years upon years, I was stuck by parents house not being able to escape having over-caring parents and always felt trapped. I always wished for things to be different and always wanted a life, I wanted a job, something I could do instead of playing the same damn game everyday on my PC. I'm 27 as well. I know it's a horrid feeling of feeling lonely and not being able to go anywhere except out to town eventually when I was allowed out the house, I went to town at 21 or so for the first time :(
I’m going through the same thing. I used to work 60-70 hour weeks as a construction working and saving up to move out of my parents house. Once I got enough money saved, I lost most of it due to my medical bills/shitty insurance (knee injuries/concussions) and legal costs for an attorney.
Now I have been unemployed since 2020 and live off SSI and SSD. My mom is very overbearing and won’t let me get another job or anything that can make me extra money. I’m back in school studying computer science; but I won’t have enough money to move out until I’m 30.
Now I’m 24, I never had a gf, have no friends, lost all my hair in 3 months (might be from COVID) and I’m a loser. I want some fun experiences but the only good experience was losing my virginity (a few months ago)
I try to be proactive by exercising and studying languages. Plus video games and pot helps
@@trowwzers5057 That sucks man. I've lost alot of money due to parents but won't go into detail. It's annoyed me alot. I'm stuck at my mums with a contracted number of hours and not allowed anymore hours, I need a better job than where I am.
When I was 21 my mother cut her throat open with a knife and I found her dead. My family did not help me at all .
I finished college but my one romantic relationship fell apart by 24. I had a career and I was a drug addict and alcoholic by nicht. When the lockdown happened I drank myself homeless and lost everything. Now I just turned 30 and I have to start all of life over now that im sobered up and at least living in a rented RV.
Everyday i daydream of death.
It is very hard looking back on my 20s at who I was at 20 and who I've become, and the toll that my lifestyle took on my body and all the nights of loneliness and wanting to die.
Now fixing my life in the face of the world falling apart all alone in Texas.
Doing my best to make friends.
So many people are shut down.
At 27 I had a major breakdown episode feeling the same way like I’d wasted my life, hadn’t done anything and missed out on experiences I should’ve gotten that notice everyone else getting. This from being antisocial and depressed closing myself off as a result of being abused as a child and feeling lost and always sad. Now I’m 38, still struggling with it and would give anything to be 27 again because grand scheme wise it’s extremely young. I’m constantly stuck in this hindsight seeing what I should have done different cycle and it’s a living hell. The real sucky thing is I was a good looking with great physical genes 20 something guy and probably could’ve had an abundance of these great experiences if I could’ve just gotten out of my own way. It’s a gut wrenching feeling knowing you completely squandered you’re prime and now it’s gone and you’ll never get it again
Wow ive experienced the same frustration. I have autism and struggled with initiative and social ability to be able to access and know what is out there in the community i live in. I felt imprisoned at home alot seeing people on social media with friends looking like having fun.
I now know how to find people near my age with same interests by being aware of the places i can go to meet them like open mic nights.
I feel so much loss and upset i had to feel lonely and cut off.
You're a legend keep up the good work
I see myself in your story 💙 btw i keep hearing always from older people that life just starts from 50 years.. video is great!
Thank you🥺 It’s good to know anything can happen!
I guess I’ll finally be able to find a partner, get married, have a family, home, start my life at 50 then! 🤣
@@LDT7Y well, make an effort for it😁
This was a beautiful video. Thank you for sharing and opening up cause it really helped me. You have a lovely personality and seem very genuine!
Thank you 🥰 so glad it helped 💕
So proud of you xxx was so lovely to watch xxx
Thank you Leah 🥺💖
Thank you
Missed out My early 20s and late teens...sacrificed my desires for others...now I am in late 20s..I regret that I missed out my teen and young life trying to be in a way that others want...this is one of the biggest mistake i have made
This video was so much needed for me thank youu so much for making it
I wasted a few years of my life drinking and now I focus on books, literature and artwork. It's the only time I'm happy.
My 5 favorite Amazon purchases:
- Icon by Frank Frazetta
- Scream of Eagles by Robert Wilcox
- The Joy of Art by Carolyn Schram
- 7x7x7 SpeedCube (rubic's cube)
- Great Fighter Jets of the Galaxy 1 by Tim Gibson
I missed out on all the fun in my youth... 27 and missing out on ALOT of fun in the adult world... I wish I wanna die in my sleep
I feel the same, hope things turn around.
Needed this. Thank you.
I’m 19 and I smoke cigarettes, drink every night, and work a backbreaking oilfield job and have 1 good friend that I rarely see, I always think about going back to high school and doing everything different, but no matter what you never can, I wish I could go to college parties and blow a bunch of money on fun but I never will because I got so many bills I barely make enough to save but this is life I chose to live and I wouldn’t trade it for anything else I know all them rich kids partying every day and spending their parents money aren’t gonna have half the knowledge people like me will in 20 years. But it does sound like a lot of fun having no sense of responsibility or consequences.
Hello Everyone!
I just want to let you all know that life is one long day and that we are all going to die. Perfect/wasted/not a minute wasted life,etc - so just take it easy and have goals and spend time with your loved ones and make memories with them and stay hydrated and eat real food XO
Kate I am Ollie I am now 53 I feel the same way about my 30 or so I met a young lady bought a house with her was with her for seven years only to find out that she had been seeing a old school boyfriend behind my back . And this was a person who I thought I would start a family with. Which hurt me alot if I am honest. Not had a few good years of late at one point when COVID had just started I found myself without a home was sleeping in car for a bit . Then this last year my mum died of cancer which was hard but I am glad I was with her in the hospice till the end . It all hurts alot .😢 I know pain only to well
I’m so sorry to hear that 🥺 sounds like you’ve really been through it. I really hope things can ease for you and it starts to get better soon. Look after yourself, sending strength and light your way 🧡
Hmm. Yeah. Thank you. 🙂
Oh this was such a lovely message ❤️
Social media over-exaggerates the amount of “living” the average person actually does.
Plus, all that stuff gets expensive. Most these people are the best off financially tbh.
I enjoy your videos.
Love this Kate, great video! such wise words! 😘
Thanks Lucy! ❤️
Cool ❤
Im 49 and was a chronic drinker and misdiagnosed thyroid and celiac patient for years. I know all about missing life. I was sick and medicating myself for 25 years . Sad 😔
You get fewer chances to do anything great the older you get.
Awww hey that was amazing to listen to.
Bless your heart for making this♥️
Same age. I left my abusive family at 18 and have been in and out of hostels, temporary accommodations, been on 1 date at 18 and have became a depressed recluse after college finished. I’m stuck in the benefits system as I am in temporary accommodation and the rent is ridiculous e.g I take home £1000 and my rent will be £800 so either way I’m stuck on benefits. I have no real support. I feel like my childhood shaped my now and I’m trying to live
This is me right now at 24. Just what I needed to hear at this time.
I’m so glad I’ve encountered this video
Life expectancy is not skyrocketing though. It's roughly the same as it's ever been, saving from death at birth, infections (thanks to antibiotics and penicilin) etc. The average person can expect to live to around 80, increased if you are lucky.
Relationships took.most of my 20s and I'm sure my friends can agree I wish I just dated I feel like I've had 3 -5marriages. NOt 3-5 boyfriends
love this
You can't change what's written we believe that too. But you can change what you do and change your life and it will change then what is written so for some it's hard we let bad things take over we should let positive things take over. I'm mentally very tired it's so difficult I want to just say like right I'm going out getting up in the morning going to my best job I can't do it and I need to work on this some how
What i really want is to travel to UK, meet famous people before they go. I have so many dreams and yet there are times I feel behind in life and im only 28. I could have met Stan Lee and now he's gone. There are once-in-a-lifetime opportunities youre never going to get and you reap what you sow in the end. Whoever said "good things come to those who wait" should just f off
I’m 19 and sort of feel this way
So... I'm not the only one... ⏰
But what would you suggest to your past self ? For those of currently without people .. we don’t know what’s around the corner, yes, but what to do in the meantime so we can still feel fulfilled & not regret the time passing by now ?
It’s so much worse when you’ve been homeschooled your whole life
fr
No, most people are not part of hook up culture. All girls are just dating a very small percentage of men
Oh dear
your really good how you explain i luv ur RUclips channel I agree I get jealous too, and I wonder why I'm this way. They only person I try and trust now is God hes my only help on life I don't like to ask for things but I believe in miracles when you are a right person and havent harmed others but others harm you. when you have any form of ill health it's takes a toll on general life. I find that I can't move forward from my life I stay on a bed all day I don't speak to no or go anywhere I feel angry with food tea and nothing interested me my legs hurt I get disturbed I feel my life is wasting I want to achieve my goals but that seems far away as you need money to do everything and I can't afford stuff so I do free things like help with volunteering for a charity get free classes to use a computer and this is life I feel helpless because I need a job I was so strong and enthusiastic and happy with lots of energy now I don't. huge difference and I need help to just get the way I was and I want to just live that's it I also appreciate everything although I have nothing. Your so beautiful keep doing videos Thank you for sharing really enjoyed this beautiful video Thank you
Their daddy's pay their rent.
Waaaaaaaaaa..
Shit man😞
Ur moms 27
I'm 49 imagine how the fuck I feel🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 I feel like I missed the boat life passing me by all my cousins friends married with kids grown now they are parents. Me??? Nothing but hardship upon hardship in bitter than a bag of lemons Jesus blessed me with Lemon Popsicles. Thought I had a God!!!