How Apps Have Changed Dating and Attraction with Matthew Hussey and Lewis Howes

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  • Опубликовано: 7 янв 2025

Комментарии • 71

  • @victoriaellis5977
    @victoriaellis5977 4 года назад +30

    This was so great and I think you really nailed it when you spoke about how there is just so much noise that it starts to drown things out. I was in a relationship for a very long time and then took some time for myself, but have started dating again in the past few months. (Yes, in the midst of a global pandemic. Smart, right?) I had never used dating apps in the past because I have always enjoyed meeting people organically. Now, it almost feels like I have to use the apps. I get a fair amount of matches and messages, but it often just feels like the same thing over and over. It gets boring quickly because nobody puts any effort into the conversation. Or, they immediately tell you that they are looking for something very serious (I get told that a lot) and it's just too much. I think that is ultimately what everyone wants eventually, but I'd like to have a decent conversation with someone first! Dating apps are like the fast food of dating. They can give you almost instant gratification, but that feeling often doesn't last.

    • @tairix3616
      @tairix3616 4 года назад +1

      Dating app is strictly only for a hookup and instant gratification junkies. You won’t find quality men and women👌

    • @wennyyulina4522
      @wennyyulina4522 4 года назад +5

      I feel you! I get bored easily on dating apps, but I really like this one guy I met there, however, he invested so little in the communication so as Matthew said, I made my standard pretty clear by saying that as much as I love talking to him, I want the efforts to be equal and I wish to have a good quality conversation instead of 'good morning and how are you' every single time then he'll disappear for days... he hasn't respond yet and I'm ready to move on

    • @likearollingstone007
      @likearollingstone007 4 года назад

      Totally agree. Don't you miss going out, having fun and meet ladies ( or guys lol ) in person.

    • @victoriaellis5977
      @victoriaellis5977 4 года назад +9

      @@tairix3616 I feel like that is a little bit of a simplistic view. Yes, there are a lot of people who are just looking for a hookup (which is fine, BTW, if thats what they want and they are honest about it.), but I wouldn't say that there are no quality people on dating apps. Just like in life, there are all kinds of people who choose to use apps for one reason or another. That doesn't make them low quality people.

    • @namakuhani_
      @namakuhani_ 4 года назад +1

      Yasssh!! Genuine connection takes time and needs the real quality time to process.

  • @priscilamonte-serrat2520
    @priscilamonte-serrat2520 3 года назад +5

    I just ended a 18 years relationship. First time using apps because of covid and hating it. There is nothing like a real life flerting (conection and energy).

    • @melissacarvajal142
      @melissacarvajal142 3 года назад

      True. I ended a 5 year relationship, and I downloaded tinder for the first time, also bc of covid. I find it incredible boring so far. Much more excitement to walk up to someone and start a conversation in real life than a like followed by a “sup”

  • @laragoodyer2808
    @laragoodyer2808 4 года назад +16

    ... Organic connection!! Tried online dating - yes too much noise! We need to relax into getting to know someone ... and focus people... if there is connection, explore it and GIVE IT A CHANCE - stop looking for shiny things (all superficial btw) ... recognise a ‘diamond in the rough’ 😉😁💖

    • @tailgunner2
      @tailgunner2 4 года назад

      Good luck getting a woman to look up from her phone to do that.

    • @likearollingstone007
      @likearollingstone007 4 года назад

      With the app everyone feels intitled to an 8-9 or even a 10. They are having 4 or 5 conversations at the time, everybody knows it, nobody feels special anymore.

    • @emeraldeyes8688
      @emeraldeyes8688 4 года назад

      It doesn’t matter how you meet. IRL or not. You can meet someone in a grocery store but they are still actively using multiple dating apps. So don’t assume that when they are dating you that they aren’t using dating apps on the side. It’s the sad truth.

  • @emeraldeyes8688
    @emeraldeyes8688 4 года назад +6

    Dating apps and social media in general have ruined authenticity and it’s created an addiction of sorts. Married and “seriously” dating individuals are still using dating apps. At this point you need to assume that most on these apps are lying about something. It’s whether or not you want to take the time and wait around for them to prove who they are, and if their intentions are truly genuine. But good luck with THEM waiting on YOU to do that. Most want instant ego boosts and notches on their belts or they move on. It’s very sad.

  • @EarlyBirdCraft
    @EarlyBirdCraft 4 года назад +51

    Dating apps made people numbers.

    • @likearollingstone007
      @likearollingstone007 4 года назад +5

      Yep, we became odds. Folks are pushing 3-4 conversations at the time...

    • @vixis4760
      @vixis4760 4 года назад

      True

    • @sueblack5794
      @sueblack5794 4 года назад +1

      It is basically shopping for people.

    • @likearollingstone007
      @likearollingstone007 4 года назад +2

      sue black Everyone thinks he/she is the buyer, evidently some suckers are being bought

    • @ibrahimhamada5751
      @ibrahimhamada5751 4 года назад

      You are true

  • @sueblack5794
    @sueblack5794 4 года назад +29

    “Be different”. ...well start doing that by getting off of dating apps. No one wants to hear it, or accept it....but it changes your life for the better in many ways. I had rather meet one or two quality people in IRL a year than 100s I could message on a app. quality over quantity. Apps eat your soul, strip your worth, are basically sex driven and throws you and out like produce in a market.Get off of apps and stop being a number for someone’s notch and for other people needing a self esteem boost.

    • @emeraldeyes8688
      @emeraldeyes8688 4 года назад +1

      I agree BUT I guarantee you that any single person you meet IRL has at least three active dating profiles out there. Many are using 5-10 dating apps at once lol. It’s an epidemic.

    • @willjones1826
      @willjones1826 4 года назад

      Absolutely agree

    • @sueblack5794
      @sueblack5794 4 года назад +1

      @@emeraldeyes8688 True but I know I’m at least not part of it.

    • @tailgunner2
      @tailgunner2 4 года назад +1

      @@emeraldeyes8688 im a man, im not one of them.

    • @yx-z1038
      @yx-z1038 4 года назад +2

      true but where do you want to find a Partner , otherwise ?!

  • @cmjb6118
    @cmjb6118 4 года назад +55

    “How Apps Have Ruined Dating and Attraction”. There, fixed that for you.

    • @likearollingstone007
      @likearollingstone007 4 года назад +2

      Thank you

    • @tailgunner2
      @tailgunner2 4 года назад

      Close, I would have gone with.
      "How Apps Have MUTATED Dating and Attraction" like a cancer.
      There is a reason why the executives for Match.com were dragged in front of the Federal Trade Commission to explain themselves.
      Another good story, out of Australia, of a woman that successfully sued a matchmaking service for $36,000 for failing to find her a "suitable man".

    • @MelleyWL687
      @MelleyWL687 4 года назад

      @@tailgunner2 It's a good thing I gave up on Match then hahahaha. What a waste.

  • @annabethsims914
    @annabethsims914 4 года назад +7

    I agree that the story isn't romantic, like: kid:" How did you meet mom?" Parent: "We both swiped right then texted each other then went on a date"
    But honestly, I think you're underestimating the level of anxiety I have when texting someone over the internet. Maybe that's just me though

  • @jasmineolsson9447
    @jasmineolsson9447 4 года назад

    Nailing it, Matthew! Just like in business. The best seller is now winning the first rounds.

  • @frankl7370
    @frankl7370 3 года назад

    My ex and I had the best story of attraction ever. No swiping bs. Too bad we were not equipped to keep the connection

  • @crystalanamericaninsicily
    @crystalanamericaninsicily 4 года назад +3

    I am PRO online dating. It's all about how you use it. Better on the PC...take your time to get to know each other. Apps can become Superficial. You just look at the FOTO. You need to look at the whole Profile not just the FACE. 😉

    • @lizrain8306
      @lizrain8306 3 года назад +1

      You are PRO dating. Which is your aim obviously. But some people would like to end up with a worth while relationship that can progress in a reality. PRO dating seems like an endless online game set on a course that will exist on a superficial empty level which will most likely last for ever. Like a safe fantasy zone.

    • @crystalanamericaninsicily
      @crystalanamericaninsicily 3 года назад

      @@lizrain8306 NO! First rule. Don't date ONLINE. If there's feelings. Exchange numbers and MEET. Public place of course.

  • @tinabrown9990
    @tinabrown9990 3 года назад +1

    Brilliant! So what is the cure?

  • @PerrySkyePhoenix
    @PerrySkyePhoenix 4 года назад +1

    So... how do we stand out amongst all of the other options? I've been using online dating apps for 2 years.

  • @shaylagoogle3097
    @shaylagoogle3097 4 года назад +2

    I like meeting ppl in real life! Apps not to fond of it. Its good to meet ppl you probably wouldn't meet other wise but, it depends what you are looking for. Ppl think they have more options what ppl forget is...... Chemistry is hard to find. Not everyone is for you!!!!! Goodluck singles.

  • @theamberturner
    @theamberturner 4 года назад +1

    So much noise...true unfortunately. It is definitely interesting. It harder to connect with people when it comes to relationships and business. That is why it is important to be uniquely YOU. Like he says, it makes us different.

  • @barbarawilson3153
    @barbarawilson3153 4 года назад +1

    It's not always easy to do but I rather meet guys in the supermarket or the stores instead of going online

    • @tailgunner2
      @tailgunner2 4 года назад

      What time of day do you shop?
      When I grocery shop, it's after work, post 5 PM. The usual customers are often older than I am, like ten years older minimum, and im 40.

  • @julieadamson6398
    @julieadamson6398 4 года назад +3

    I wouldn’t reject you Matthew Hussey

    • @LSSYLondon
      @LSSYLondon 4 года назад

      I would. His Essex accent is painful to listen too.

    • @julieadamson6398
      @julieadamson6398 4 года назад

      Lissy London I like it and I dont usually like English accents been English myself.

  • @annepenaranda1287
    @annepenaranda1287 4 года назад

    😂❤️

  • @dancing1133
    @dancing1133 4 года назад

    Damn lewis, you cute!!! haha :)

  • @sophiawolf2990
    @sophiawolf2990 4 года назад

    Pou pupilles c’est un très beau film par semaine pupioiuiuooi

  • @RachyNoodleNest
    @RachyNoodleNest 4 года назад +5

    Maybe it's just me but I've heard of some really successful stories of people meeting on dating apps. Both my sister and brother met their husband and wife on Tinder and Match.
    Dating apps are just an introduction. The introduction isn't important. The work involved in keeping a relationship going is the same regardless of where you 'met' them.
    I found myself single after a 7 year relationship and met my next boyfriend on a dating app. We didn't work out, but that had nothing to do with meeting him online.

    • @goddyhelen6049
      @goddyhelen6049 4 года назад

      Hello to whom it may concern I can recommend you to someone great and powerful who helped me get my ex back

    • @goddyhelen6049
      @goddyhelen6049 4 года назад

      Text on whrsapp

    • @goddyhelen6049
      @goddyhelen6049 4 года назад

      +(234)-815-689-6436