LETS TALK ABOUT GRIEF | How Am I Doing?
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- Опубликовано: 30 сен 2024
- Hi lovelies,
Since losing Mel, many of you have reached out and checked in on me and I appreciate it so much. I think it's so important to talk about grief and to be honest so today I'm doing that as well as I can. Thank you for all of your support.
Just Giving for Mel Thompson's family:
www.gofundme.c...
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The day I found out about Mel’s passing was complete shock. That night I walked my dog as usual and thought about how I shared a love of firebutts with her. I had never heard fireflies called that until her Tiny Marvels palette and I laughed so hard and have called them firebutts ever since. Mel was just like a beautiful firebutt, only here for a short season but she lit up the world with her laugh and her smile! Next summer I will sit out with the firebutts and celebrate their light and remember Mel.
And now I regret that I didn't buy the Tiny Marvels Palette in time. I was waiting for later in like February, because Spring hits Arizona early. Now, I'm not sure if Sydney Grace will restock it in Mel's honor or not. But what a beautiful, lovely reminder that would have been. BTW, I now will call them Fire Butts when I finally move back east.
@@nancytipton7602 I am so glad that I did! I really debated about it at the time because I had bought a lot of new releases that month but my sweet hubby said to get it because it was so unique!
@@nancytipton7602 they are restocking tiny marvels . SG said it on their Instagram
@@nancytipton7602 they are bringing it back but not sure of a date
My experience with grief was loosing my mum suddenly at 59 from a brain aneurysm. It's been many years since her passing. Approx two months later a cashier asked me if I was OK in marks and Spencer, I said, no, I'm not OK then I just broke down, I had to be helped to sit down. It was then that it had really hit me that my mum was gone. I had done the funeral arrangements etc and being the eldest of four, I felt it was my job to sort things out - dad was in no fit state to do anything. I'd sometimes drive round for coffee as only ten minutes away by car and just before I'd get there I'd realise, oh, mum's not here. Comes in waves now for me, definitely easier as time has moved on. I keep checking my inbox thinking Mel hasn't uploaded yet, knowing full well a new video is not, not just not, never, going to appear again - it seems too final. Mel did leave a legacy imo and that was to be, the best you, in every aspect, not only makeup. Somebody said, there are just some people in this world who are only meant to be here for a short time, to show us love and kindness, truly like an angel... I would put Mel in that category.
@Julie Kerr 💕
Little notes, voicemails, and things like that are wonderful... but they are only tools used to build your friendship. Your actual friendship is built. It's real. And no amount of time passing or missing cards will ever change that fact. Your relationship with Mel and what it brought in to your life is forever. It sounds like it's a wonderful friendship, and you are deserving of that kind of magic and happy memories. Laugh hard in your happy moments... I'm sure Mel is right there laughing with you. Love you, Charlotte.
This is such a beautiful message and so true. It's difficult to remind yourself of this when you're in the grips of grief but you just need to hold strong. We're here for you Charlotte ❤
Mel was so special…. So many people were touched by her and loved her despite not meeting her. Sending you love Charlotte x
I miss Mel so much. She gave me so much joy with her positivity and her smile .... the makeup looks. I try everyday to be a better Person, because of her.... her loss is so so sad 😿😿 thank you for this video ❤❤❤❤
I wish I could say something more than thank you, it doesn't really feel like enough. It's so important for us to not just simply gloss over our grief and pretend as though things are normal. Mel was special to a lot of us - I was one of the people who never really interacted with her a lot, but I enjoyed her videos and found so many wonderful people in this community thanks to her. She was a wonderful person.
It is such a strange and new experience- mourning someone you watch on RUclips. I can’t tell anyone why I’m sad or they think I’m nuts; like why would I be sad as I never met her, I never spoke to her. But I’ve been watching her life for years so I feel like I know her. Others don’t get it and I feel like I can’t discuss it with anyone.
There is no way I can discuss with any of my family because they wouldn’t understand. My daughter doesn’t understand why I still grieve for my husband who died 16 years ago this month. “Just don’t think about it” she says, like I have a switch in my head that I can flip to control my thoughts.
This is spot on, so true, I can't talk to anyone about the grief I've felt since Mel's passing. Not personally knowing her, people will certainly think Im crazy... It was a gut punch, shock, and complete sadness and tears. And I'm so saddened for her family, and friends. I miss "Hello Beauties"
I said the same thing to my husband 🥺 It’s like my feelings aren’t validated because I never met her. He responded and told me “but you did know her, you watched her regularly”. I completely understand where you are coming from. 😢🥺
Grief is the loneliest experience I have ever went through! I lost my husband 4 years ago and it was a long time before I could articulate my loss into words! It’s so important to speak about loss and how it makes you feel! The stages of grief are not to be considered a linear concept- you can go back and forth and never experience some at all until the point your life again becomes bigger than the grief! But I still have my moments! Mel’s loss is so sudden and awful! It has hit me surprisingly hard I often find myself thinking of her family! Keep going and you will survive this and Mel will always be remembered! ❤️
I feel u there I lost my soulmate 2 yrs ago. My best friend for 11years, my son was 9 at the time. Its still SO HARD. I loved Mel as well. I just know they are both in a better place where all there is, is unconditional love. Thanks charlotte for speaking truth, and sending the message that it IS ok to NOT be ok😘 sending everyone love and light 💖💮🌺
Oh Charlotte… I really appreciate you saying this. One of the many things I love about you is your authenticity and your honesty. I get it, make up may be our creative outlet, but let’s be honest it’s frivolous…. Who gives a damn how we look when there’s an empty space in our heart?
I have found myself re-watching Mels videos… I wanted to hear her laugh and “hey beauties!” it was comforting, rather than denial. Then I continued to watch to support her family. Puffin has said that he will keep up her videos… so I wanted to help in any way I could.
I really appreciate you and your honesty. I’m so sorry to hear that you’re struggling…. thanks for talking and giving us a space to too. I just really hope that it helped you. Did it?
What you said about speaking about Mel really resonated with me… I had to take it offline - I told my mum… I explained that I never met her but how much she meant to me and how devastated I feel about her loss… there is a friendship there, even if it’s one sided. She completely got it and gave me a hug (not wearing her favourite jumper of mine though ;). ).
It’s lovely to see you Charlotte. Keep well and be kind to yourself. Xxx
I’m so glad you made this video. I have been watching Mel for years and when I heard of her passing it felt like a close friend was gone. I have been feeling sad since and held back the tears, because It’s so weird to be so sad about someone I have never talked to and never met. There’s nobody to talk to about this because how would anyone understand why I’m so sad about someone I just watched on RUclips. I have seen your sadness in your videos even though you try to put a smile on your face. Sending you lots of love. Your video felt like a big hug which was much needed ❤️❤️❤️
thank you Charlotte ❤It is a relief to hear influencers talk about Mel and keep it real. That's what makes the connection with subscribers humane. Mel's passing is so disturbing to so many of us, a life cut too short and so sudden. It's the sheer helplessness of it, and I can only imagine how helpless Mel's husband and family felt when the tragedy happened. I watch at least a couple of Mel's videos everyday, out of love and respect for Mel, for her art, and for her family! Mel must be smiling down on us! 🌹
It’s very brave of you Charlotte to speak to all of us about grief. I agreed with many things you said. It is important to be able to speak about grief and GO through grief stages. I recently lost a very close friend to Covid and I felt like no one asked me about it and I felt and still feel like I have to hold all my sadness inside my heart . At times I feel like there’s not enough space in there to hold all the emotions and pain In. Sending love your way 💕
I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending love. ❤️
I’m sorry you feel like you have to hold your sadness inside. That’s not the case - I can definitely relate to the space to hold emotions and pain. I agree that this is such an important conversation, talking about what happens to us when we’re going through grief. Take care and I hope you feel loved today.
Eve, so sorry for your loss🙏🏻❤️
@@analinsaturria6845 thank you 💕
@@KarenCralli ❤️
It doesn’t feel right for me to watch any “normal” makeup content. I feel sad because I want Mel’s take on everything but realize we’ll never get that again and it’s gutting. You’re really the only beauty RUclipsr I’ve been able to watch since Mel left us. I had so much in common with Mel including my age and it made me so much more aware of my mortality and that of the people around me. Thank you for making this video and speaking about this.
Thank you so much fort this. When my brother died by suicide, I tortured myself about not returning his last call. In time I realized that he knew I loved him, and that is what mattered. I'm sure Mel knew how you felt about her, and would not want you to feel any guilt. God bless you, Charlotte.
Hi Sheila, thanks for sharing this. I lost my best friend this way in June. We hadn’t spoken in a week because the last time we spoke I was kind of a Debbie Downer and wanted to feel better the next time we spoke so I was giving myself time and waiting until my last day of work to send him a message so I could share the good news that I was done at work…and I got the news the next morning (I was 6 hours behind him). I hope I can reach that level of convincing myself that he really did knew how much he meant to me.
@@analinsaturria6845 Oh, Analin, I'm so sorry for your loss. Believe me, it took a lot longer than 4 months for me to get over my guilt! It really is true that time heals. Hope you get peace about this soon.
@@sheilabrooks3436 thank you for your kind words, Sheila. Mostly I’m capable of remembering our 14 years of friendship with a smile. Right now the hard part is every time something happens that we should be talking about - which was basically everything but little things like sports and politics - and I can’t. I do know from looking at our message thread that we were on each other’s minds all the time, and in that way, I hope he really knew. I think he did but the doubt of these first few months is gut wrenching.
The story from your childhood was so touching. Such a great reminder that everyone will want/need something different in terms of grief support and the only way we can know how to best support someone is to ask.
Sorry for your loss, Mel was a beautiful lady and I’m going to miss her too. I love your content, your honesty and you often make me laugh. It’s ok to be feeling like you are we’re here for you whatever.
Grief is so strange - you feel like doing anything or thinking of anything else besides being upset is wrong. Anything that would usually seem important no longer does. Thank you for talking about this Charlotte - I am a fellow brit but have never been comfortable with pretending everything is fine and undermining how we feel - let it out! It's there regardless and surpressing it does nothing good ❤️
Oh Charlotte, thank you so much for making this video. It’s always hard to lose someone close, especially when they are so young. When I found out about Mel’s death, it was just after dinner and a friend sent me a message on Instagram. I opened it up and there was Wayne’s post. I tried to explain to my husband who Mel was and halfway through burst into tears. My husband is a Hindu and has very very different views on death than we do in the west. He seemed unsympathetic but really he doesn’t see death as the end and doesn’t even feel like the person is gone. I am very jealous of this attitude, I can tell you! There is so much I want to say but I don’t know how. I admired Mel’s talent so much. In one of her videos she mentioned you in passing and I thought ooh I must check out that channel. I’m very glad I did. Take of yourself lovely Charlotte and deal with this in any way you feel is right. Sending all my love ❤️xxx
Thank you so much for putting so many of my feelings into words. Mel was one of my favorites to watch and miss her genuine, sweet personality. I am just as you described an introvert who doesn't really comment much. I have felt such deep sadness for someone who I never met and feel if I share my sadness people don't understand. I really needed this video. Sending you hugs.
Watching beauty videos has been so hard since the news of Mel's passing, so I can only imagine how hard it is to film them. Her loss is felt so much each day, it really has changed a lot of our RUclips experience. I've really struggled to find the joy in makeup because she's been such a huge part of that journey for me...I have a giant makeup collection, purchased on Mel's recommendation. I hope to one day find joy in playing in it and rewatching her videos but right now its too painful.
Knowing there won't be future reviews is so sad, for us yes, but more that she is cheated out of the chance to. If that makes sense!
@@polly1141 Totally agree! When the news broke of the new Lisa Eldridge foundation yesterday, my first thought was Mel and how excited she would be and what an excellent, thorough review she'd do. And then I think about all the things Mel could have created herself... She was so brilliantly talented and had so much potential. Breaks my heart.
The thing that keeps getting me is that I keep expecting to see her in my subscription box. She popped up practically everyday and it was something that I came to expect to see. It was comforting. And now I have to keep reminding myself that there won’t be any new videos and I won’t get to see her sweet smile and hear “Hey, Beauties” ever again. And my heart breaks.
There’s something to be said for societies that had, or still have, a formal mourning period; this is important not only for the persons suffering but also gives friends who are on the outside looking in an opportunity to show empathy and provide strength for someone who is suffering. It’s a process that shouldn’t be rushed, glossed over or ignored and a healthy grieving period is important. 🤗🤗🤗. My heart breaks for you Charlotte and, of course, for Mel’s husband and children.
I remember when my mother passed away this year...it was expected cause she was sick and I knew it would happen and it was heartbreaking but what got me was when I tried to find a voicemail from her or anything with her voice on it and knew I had deleted all of them I completely lost it...its the little things you try to hold onto because you dont want to forget. I completely understand how you feel and im grieving right along with you and im sorry you lost someone close to you. I hope you find peace and comfort ❤
Thank you Charlotte, it does feel weird that other people I follow are just going on like nothing happened and not that everything should stop but it’s nice to have you make this. Sending love
Not everyone feels or displays grief the same way. For some it is totally private and some people will simply not feel the same level of grief at all or experience it only for their nearest and dearest. And that is all Okay.
Blah blah yes that is so true, I just feel so sad for Mel’s husband Puffin and her lovely kids who must be absolutely devastated and also her friend Kelsie Briana who she was so close to 💜
I obviously realize that I was just thanking and acknowledging Charlotte.
I can't thank you enough for this video Charlotte. Your empathy for us all whilst experiencing your own grief is an incredible gift. You've allowed me to be ok with feeling really sad about this, I felt guilty , almost like I had no right as I had never met her. So your understanding means so much. Thank you. X
Thank you for being so open about this. It´s so important to grief. Lost my husband in a car accident 3 years ago. A went through al the stages. But it does get better😘.
Sending you a big hug across the pond. Thank you for sharing your feelings. It is so helpful to all of us on the outside that didn't know Mel personally. She touched so many people in so many ways and will be greatly missed. Keeping your healing heart in my prayers along with her precious children and husband. Your children are blessed to have such a wonderful mum.🙏❤
Mel is an incredible example of how to be a kind generous supportive person. I appreciate you remembering her and sharing your feelings
Thank you so much for this, Charlotte. Thank you for being honest because I am feeling the exact same way and I never met her.
🦋Coming out of my comfort zone and commenting on this beautiful message you have given us❤️ I think about Mel every day and struggle to understand why she was taken from this world, I can’t make sense of it. I want so much to support her Family by watching her videos but I can not, and it makes me angry at myself. Thank You for this space 🦋
You still have her comments on your videos, so that's something! 💖 And nobody can your memories of/with her away!
Hello Charlotte. I never comment, and I am having a hard time with Mel lost. I don't feel I should say anything to people in "real life" because it sounds a little bit stupid say to someone I am so heartbroken with losing Mel.I didn't know it would affect me so much to lose one of my favourite RUclipsrs. But it is no that what bothers me, it the sadness of thinking about her kids, her family and I also feel so angry because so many bad people in the world that problably deverve bad things and why Mel needed to die, I also feel sad because she was in pain for so long. I am going to miss her content. I guess I am getting al the anger that you didn't get. Take care!
I was absolutely shocked and in disbelief when I heard about Mel. It didn’t seem real for days. I was so sad for at least a week. And I couldn’t explain it to people (other than my fiancé) because I don’t know anyone who watches beauty RUclips like I do. Her videos keep popping up in my timeline too, and it’s just another reminder. Thank you for making this video! I know it was cathartic for you, but it is for a lot of us too. Sending you virtual hugs from the states!
You’re spot on about keeping people alive in discourse- and you are awesome for continuing to think and talk about this. I miss Mel very much - and I’m with you seeing the videos pop up in my feed always makes me think for a second she is posting, but I’m also glad to see her still there
You nailed it with everything you said. It’s such a strange feeling in my heart. I can’t explain WHY I hurt for someone I never met. But it did FEEL as if she was a friend. Thank you for posting this. And thank you for being such a beautiful person and sharing your feelings. I’m a funeral director- oddly enough- I deal with things like this all the time. But this hits differently. Numbness. And sadness. Hopefully time heals.
SO glad you made this video….my thoughts/“stage” of this is how can the world just “move on” without Mel? Because it’s so obvious she was such a special person to so many people & larger than life in so many ways. We know that she would want us to move forward, be happy, & be creative but it’s hard when we’re not quite at that place yet. But we’ll all “get there,” each in our own time. Knowing Mel, she would understand that too.😊
Charlotte you are so kind and loving and I’m so sorry this has been so hard for you . I’ve been grieving too and have watched her videos and missed her smile and kindness. She’s been all over my feeds. Thankfully I haven’t heard anyone say anything negative about Mel. It’s probably best I haven’t because I would be very defensive of her. Grieve all you need. To many the stances are just what some people experience but nobody grieved the same way
Big hugs to you ❤️ Mel was such a beautiful person inside and out. Definitely left a hole in our lives/the community 🌹🌹🌹🌹
Thank you for getting me hooked on Charlotte Tilbury makeup. I was a too Faced and color pop fan but Charlotte’s products are amazing. Your makeup reviews are part of my life now, you are amazing at what you do. Mel would want you to carry on with your channel. I follow you and buy products you recommend because you are real and honest, keep on being honest that’s why I love your channel.
Thank you for sharing your feelings and being so honest Charlotte. 😘
Grief really has no timeline…
Self-care is SO important too.
Sending you lots of love 💕
It’s impossibly difficult when a young, vibrant person suddenly dies….Long before their time.
I agree completely with your thoughts, here. Grief is different for everyone. It is still haunting me, terribly, that our Mel, is no longer here. Thank you for doing this. It was so helpful.❤️
Thank you for being so open and honest. Mel was such a beautiful person - the day I heard of her passing I literally felt as if I’d been hit fair and square in the face with a frying pan ….. only way I can describe it ….. and now it’s just incredible sadness for her and her beautiful family. I miss seeing her face popping up in my feed but I’m thankful that I got to watch such a talent. Please take care of yourself and know you are appreciated 💗
Bless you Charlotte, I think you’re so brave to talk about grief. You really captured how so many of us are feeling who didn’t know Mel personally but are still experiencing this huge loss. It’s just made me appreciate the information you, Mel and our other favourite RUclipsrs give us so that we feel like a community of friends. Mel’s videos are constantly recommended to me but today is the first day I’ve been able to watch her. These are videos I’ve seen years before which are good baby steps, but I still can’t bring myself to watch her Wayne Goss video. Thank you for talking to us about this and for all your content. Sending you lots of love and support xx
I really loved listening to you talk about this, thank you for sharing your thoughts. As someone who doesn’t share my feelings right away, I actually find it really helpful to listen to others.
I am so happy to see you make this video. As a creator on RUclips and a Nurse. Once COVID hit I continued to make content but eventually stopped because I can’t find the joy that I once did before all of the really hard stuff started. I have watched you film since loosing Mel I can see the light has dimmed but I know you will heal with time. Grief and all of the emotions can strike when we least expect it.
I lost someone over the summer, and being her caretaker, it's been especially hard. I have not cried yet. Your video is 2 years ago, but it really turned a lot of lightbulbs on in my head for me, for sure, it explains the depression I've been having (I really didn't understand it). Thank you for this video, it's really helped me as I'm sure it's helped so many.
Charlotte ❤️ I loved this video so much. Thank you, honestly I'm so sorry for your grief, but by you expressing it through this video, made me feel so much better that I was feeling the same, and felt like nobody understood. I'm pretty sure it is because of you that I found Mel's channel last year. I feel like I've lost a dear friend. I really appreciate this, and I hope that as time goes by, that the grieving process gets less painful for you, but I can relate to almost everything you said. Thank you 💗🙏 Sending love from Australia! 🇦🇺 x
In the past people wore black armbands to show they had suffered a loss of someone. I wish we still did. A silent message to explain how we’re feeling.
Maybe her husband can screenshot your convo thread from Instagram for you.
Why in the heck would someone downvote this? We all knew you were closer to Mel than others and yet they have an issue with you expressing grief. Everyone grieves differently and just being able to talk about those we lose is very special. Love how you took time for yourself with LOTR
Thank you so much for this video. I was so confused as to why I felt so much grief for someone I had never met. You saying that was perfectly normal somehow makes me feel better. I am praying for all those that loved her. Hopefully making this video will help you work through your grief.
It sounds like you’re going through the “anger” stage by being angry with yourself by not keeping things you feel like you should’ve kept. It doesn’t help to be angry with yourself about those things but as you know, not everything is rational nor is there a “normal” way to do it. All in all, grief is personal to everyone. There’s no right or wrong way to grieve. My best friend’s sister was just put in hospice and even though she hasn’t passed away yet, you can tell that she’s already grieving her sister, who’s only 39. One of the ways my friend grieves is by “going out” with friends to take her mind off of things and I’m sure to some people it’s bizarre or not what she should be doing but that’s how she’s managing the pain. I manage my pain differently. I wouldn’t want to be around a lot of people. Maybe one or two, or more likely by myself. Anyway, thank you for opening up this conversation. We all miss Mel so much and I’m sending you all the love as I know you had a personal connection with her. Hugs!! xoxo
I think this is SO important to talk about especially in these times.
This was such a beautiful and sincere video❤️ Hugs❤️❤️❤️
I applauded you for this video and broaching this topic. You are a 100% correct. People are so awkward and uncomfortable with the concept of death. When both my parents passed away, people were fine with offering sympathy in the immediate aftermath. As months passed, they were eager to move on or telling me to be strong. I recall when my dad passed I was 18 and people kept telling me be strong, be strong for your mother. While I know people mean well, grieving publicly, crying is not a sign of weakness. It is a means of processing and coming to terms with loss. I think there is no timetable for grief. It is not linear and has no order. Don’t hold yourself to those lists. People should be allowed to feel what they feel and not perform for the comfort for others. When I went the group grief counseling, I recall being surprised that there were people who had lost someone several years prior. But since then I understand that there is no right or wrong way to grieve, no right or wrong time to grieve. Check with your phone carrier, sometimes they can retrieve deleted messages.
You are so genuine and real Charlotte! ❤️ I love you for that. And you are so well spoken, and talk about these things with such wisdom and grace. Mel was so special 💖 and easy to like. Her kindness poured out from her and reached us through the screen all across the globe! She is dearly missed, and it's such a tragedy that she died so young ❤️
Such a sweet video. Thank you for talking about it. It’s very apparent that you both loved each other very much. I found you through a recommendation from Mel and I’ve loved watching you both. It is a very hard thing feel grief for someone in the way that so many of us have been feeling for the loss of Mel. There hasn’t been a day that has gone by where I haven’t thought about her and her family.
Mel was and is loved by so many and she will be remembered with that love always sending you and all those who loved her love comfort and support for your self care 🥰💕
Every time I think about or someone talks about Mel I cry. She was a very special person ❤ and I feel blessed to have found her and corresponded with her through youtube 💗 I miss her ❤ my heart goes out to all who love her ♥
Only you know what you are going through and in what order you process it. Just be kind to yourself and don't set targets. You will get there in your own time xx
Thank you 🙏 society doesn’t allow us to process feelings in general, only to make us mental - that needs to change if we’re to fully heal. I never met Mel Thompson but learning about it 2 week ago has felt heavy - she was so vibrant, I’m still in shock.
I still can’t believe she’s gone - I’m in shock and I didn’t know her personally. It does feel like a hole was left and it feels heavy, like you said. -I tend to grieve WAY longer than people I know - I actually feel like “moving past it” is a betrayal of their memory, in a way - as crazy and unhealthy as that sounds. I totally understand guilt and regret too.
My heart aches for Mel, her family, her friends and for you. Nothing that you are feeling is stupid. Being filled with regret, feeling sick at heart, having good and bad days are natural phases of grief. I am glad you have a strong support system. Sending hugs and so much love and appreciation to you.
Thank you for doing this video and creating this space. When you said that we are taught not to cry it hit me. I didn’t know Mel personally but I cried when I heard of her passing. I felt like I shouldn’t be crying because I was not really someone she knew. But she was such a beautiful person and I’ve watched her for years. I’m glad your doing ok. And I just wanted you to know that this videos was greatly appreciated. Sending virtual hugs your way 🤗
This video is just what I needed today. Love your raw emotion and honesty. This video will help so many people. Sending you love and hugs 💝💝💝
I still am not very functional, had a meltdown with the loss of Mel, that hit then more lousy news unable to see my kids in the usa, canceled flights by the airlines. i am in Canada and I feel just like an jar of pain. Mel, Mecury Retrograde, just multiple multiple lows. I have bipolar depression so its just icing on this really sad cake. Lovely video thank you.
Thank you for sharing 🙏🏼 Sending you strength and lots of love.
I miss her❤️❤️❤️
I remember having this little chat with Mel about if her husband looked more like Jason statham or Vin diesel lol. She was such a funny person. I still have days where i think any time now she will post another video, sometimes i just walk around the house and say 'hey beauties' to my dog. Sending love your way, Charlotte.
This whole process has been so crazy. I never interacted with Mel more than in comments but I loved watching her and feeling like I was just having fun with my friend. This is a really hard grief process bc it doesn’t feel like I should be this upset bc I didn’t “know” her personally but we all loved her personality and we all deserve to feel the feelings. My heart goes out to you and all who loved her. ❤️❤️
Sending you love and light from me 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜
Absolutely breaking my heart for u Charlotte sending my love and thoughts 💝
Thank you so much Charlotte! ❤️ This show that even suffering you can help us to grief too... We will me here for you 🤗 I.. WE WILL ALWAYS LOVE AND MISS OUR ANGEL MEL ❤️🙏
Thank you so much for talking about this 💔❤️ Love from Sweden
I was in the beauty industry for decades as a medical skin care provider. I also have had disability for decades. I remember going to work, in pain, and thinking that "none of this stuff really matters"..people are so blind to others' pain. Yes, it is FUN to play with make-up and yes, IF it is kept in perspective then LIFE will NOT be make-up and obsession with the outer woman. LIFE will be life and make-up will be what it is.....the NOTHING part of us...not the EVERYTHING part of us. I thank God that He used my suffering to draw me to Himself through His Son and save my soul. Now I realize what is REALLY important is sharing how much God loves us with others. He is not willing that ANY would perish but that all will come to Christ and believe that God has given Himself to us through His Son to pay the debt we will have to pay HIM on the judgement day. He paid our debt of death for our wrongs in this life...sin. Have you ever seen the cross this way before? He suffered for our sins in His body, and willingly died so that we will live with Him forever, eternal life given to us now! NOTHING is more important than KNOWING where we will spend eternity, and receiving His life in this life.
When we call on the Name of the Lord, He restores us and puts everything in order in our lives We find peace with God, and peace that passes understanding. HE causes us to put ALL things in perspective. If God is for us, who can be against us? May the Lord comfort you and give you His light. Thank you for showing us the TRUE beauty you are. God loves you Ms. Charlotte, be blessed. John 3:16-18, Romans 10:8-10 Yeshua is Lord, He is risen!
Hi Charlotte. I am a new subscriber. I found you because of Mel. I just want to tell you how much I appreciate your content, your honesty and vulnerability. Blessings to you.
Thinking of you, sending you love 🥰 and hugs ❌⭕❌⭕❌⭕ and wishing you hope 🕊 in the midst of sorrow, comfort in the midst of pain. 💕 While I didn’t know Mel personally, I loved Mel 💜 and I loved her content. 💟 I will miss her terribly. 🥺💔😢
Thank you for this timeless gift, served by the algorithm two years later, after the loss of my former partner and very best friend. 🌷
I’ve been struggling to even do my makeup since Mel passed. Almost every item I have makes me think of her. She didn’t know me but she made me feel as though I had a friend. Sending you and all those that love and miss her lots of hugs from tiny bugs 🪲🐛🐝🐞🦋
🐞🐝🤍🖤 I come bk to watch this. I don't know why other then I miss Mel. She was so beautiful inside and out..Her light of pure LOVE just shined through the 📷.
I am so, so sorry. This is wayyyyyy too long.
After my mum passed I, stupidly, thought nothing could hurt me that much ever again.
Then I heard of Mel. I literally collapsed into a sobbing wreck. My poor husband came home from work to find me curled up, sobbing uncontrollably on the garden swing.
I've not recovered, I'm experiencing wave upon wave of emotions. I shouted at God, why did he have to take our beautiful Mel.
Unfortunately, I don't have any one to talk to. So, I talk to Mel (I'm not a crazy woman, I'm just hurting). Mel was absolutely beautiful, inside and out beautiful. She was unique and special and I'll never, ever forget her.
I've been watching/re-watching her vids as another way of supporting Puffin and her children. When it's just too painful, I turn off the volume and cover the screen and let it play to the end. Of course, I leave a comment. You know me Charlotte, I comment on flipping everything.
I've also started watching/re-watching Kelsee's vids, for the same reason. I'm mindful she hasn't posted a vid since Wayne's palette review and YT is her livelihood.
Thank you for posting this Charlotte, I feel less alone and lonely in my own grief.
My daily prayers are always for Mel 🕊🕊🕊🕊, her family and her very dear friends, of which you are one.
I wish you Love, light and peace Charlotte 💗🌟🙏💗🌟🙏💗🌟🙏💗
When I saw she had passed my first thought was of you and how hard her passing would hit you. I think everyone deals with grief differently. Making this video is another way to help you deal with your grief. Talking is always in my opinion the best way to move forward for everyone. Thank you for the upload and letting us know you are processing.
Charlotte this was such a beautiful and important thing to share. Grief cannot be quantified or judged. Grief hurts.
I learned the hard way last year that not talking about your grief - what you are feeling can be damaging.
A year ago I lost my best friend “Dar baby” of 30+years to cancer. It was my first exposure to painful grief. I cried. And then I got on with the business of living and didn’t talk and I eventually went off the rails. I learned that talking and sharing and crying is so very important- necessary.
Mel was such a beautiful soul - grieve for her, talk about her, cry for her. These are the ways we honour and remember.
Wrapping you up in big hugs from Canada.
Xo 🇨🇦❤️❤️❤️
Mel was amazing will miss her uploads but I will be rewatching her content xx
Thank you for making this video. I always watched Mel too. I am very sad & I miss her. I understand how many things don't seem important when we lose someone we love. I want to thank you for all of your videos. I enjoy your reviews, makeup application videos, & seeing how new makeup performs, but mostly I enjoy watching you. I love your sense of humor & your adorable accent (I am from the US). What you do is important, because you help me, and I'm sure you help others, escape into a better place through your videos. I truly appreciate YOU! I can see that You Tube is very hard, because there are many people, including some You Tubers who are not kind. Seeing their unkind videos & reading unkind comments is hurtful. They should use this quote to guide them--"If you don't have something kind to say, say nothing." After all, everyone has an opinion, although unkind people think their opinion is the end all, but they should know it is only THEIR opinion. Again, thank you for your videos & for being a part of my life. You help me to relax & unwind after a hard day's work. I also think you are absolutely beautiful on the inside & out! Thank YOU!!!
I'm watching you and crying as well, my biggest regret it's cause of lockdown I was never able to get her Palette (I've been on a almost zero buy and you know how expensive it's for us here to get anything from the US) Now that I'm finally able to get her Palette can't tell her I finally gonna have it in the next restock 😢💔 I know it's now my fault I wasn't able to get her sooner but I still feel guilty cause she will never know now 🥺 I found you and Tara through Mel, she was always my inspiration especially with her ND and Mother's tutorials, been rewatching her videos but it's not the same cause I know I watch them and can leave a comment but she will never answer back like she was always doing 😭 Not gonna stop watching her vídeos (as Kelsee Briana "Bae" said its important to keep watching them and leave comments ❤️) Think that like you I'm still on a crying and sad stage, but for me it's still hard to believe that won't have another liked comment or a response from her or even a new review on the newest launches 😢 Now it's up to you, Tara, Kelsee... But to be honest not even been using any makeup since the 27th, just not feeling it and I love makeup, especially Eyeshadows 😢 Thank you for this video @charlotte_holdcroft, it's "good" when we don't feel alone in our grief ❤️ sending lots of love your way ❤️🙏🏻
Mel was a special soul. Our grief is a loving testament to that specialness. It's appropriate. It's necessary.
I think when you asked, "Why do we not let ourselves cry?" I think it's a subconscious fear of welcoming in the pain. Of allowing it to co-exist with us, for as long as it wishes to stay. Grief can't be controlled. It's not a moment in time; it's a non-linear, unpredictable, indefinite process. Accepting and accommodating grief - these are gifts to ourselves, and ultimately that lengthy, messy process offers meaningful contributions, of love and grace and humanity, to the universe. All my love, Charlotte.
Sending you Lots of Hugs Charlotte. ❤️🤗🤗
A really lovely video Charlotte. Well said, and I think something I really needed to see and hear. Life is so precious and I think sometimes we forget how everything can change in an instant. I’ve watched Mel for years and was one of the silent subscribers. This makes me want to interact with RUclipsrs more so they know how much I appreciate their time. So thanks very much, I appreciate all of your videos (and accent, I’m from Canada)! Lots of love and hugs ❤️🤗
Take your time, we all get it and understand. Thank You for this video, and being real. I've held it in by myself, because who would (could) understand. The sadness and grief over someone I really didn't know. But the news was like a gut punch, I was shocked and sad and crying, and feeling really low. I think about her family and friends and it's just heartbreaking. I miss "Hello Beauties"
Charlotte, this is such a beautiful pure video, i live in your down to earth neighbour country The Netherlands, i know how it works....as a subscriber of both of you, i feel so sad about her suddenly passing, sending messages after midnight in Greece (we were still on holiday when Mel passed away) to as much as loved ones i could think of, not that i used Instagram so much, only the last year i guess. Emotional? Yes, having 2 Pfizer vaccines, they wanted a test from me because i can't wear a mask in the plane due to serious asthma. Friday 1st October was that test, felt lots of emotions because i lost my dear mother from covid last January, she got it in the hospital, and i was not able to say live goodbeye, phoning, digital things in January. The day after, the 2nd October, at the airport there in Greece, i immediately walked to the Chanel stuff to get a bottle of Chanel 5 like i always do for my mum...well..... did, walked back and cried. And of course being more emotinal that week because of dear Mels passing, i loved her so much Charlotte! And i am a subscriber from far away....i always called her dear eyeshadow queen....and when the gorgeous Tiny Marvels palette finally arrived here, i thought wow wow wow, never experienced this in my life, loving ALL colours in a palette, i told Mel that in a comment, and she was so happy with that!!! I did not really know her so well like you do/did, and Kelsee, Tara, Chelsea, Wayne, Jena, and everybody i forget, but, besides her being so, so talented, it spashed from the screen how giant her love for other people was!!! Some new nice makeup is coming in my home, dear Charlotte, that i ordered, and i am really happy and greatful, but could only use Tiny Marvels so far....and watch new video's about the beautiful new stuff released, or almost released Charlotte, and i love the whole community here, so, so many sweet people, but of course than i think, where is Mels video, like you also said, no uploads....she was also so honest, when she did not like something, like some TF quads: dont mess with my shades Tom, something like that, when it was not good enough. And i think those brands who can't thank Mel enough, TF, CT, PMG, SG, ND could make a palette together for her memory, call it Mel, and that lots of the profit goes to Mels heartbroken family, Charlotte, why not? I was so moved again by this, thank you Charlotte, and i will keep on praying for you and all Mels other loved ones!!!!🙏🙏🙏🙏😘😘😘😘
Love you for this video! So happy following you and Mel for so many years. Just today I was watching video's about Lisa Eldridge's new lipstick launch and suddenly I thought: I wonder what Mel would have thought about them? Isn't strange how you can love someone while not knowing them in person? That's why our grieve is real and guine. Take care💋❤
Thank you for making this video. It really helped more than you know. 💕
Thank you for this video. First thing everything morning would be to watch Mel while getting ready. She always had the most beautiful eye looks, I swear she could sell anything with her beautiful eyes! I’ve had a very challenging year. It started with my mom being diagnosed with breast cancer, my dad becoming pretty much incompetent of doing anything for himself. I had to quit my job to take care of them and just last week my husband suffered a stroke 🥲 I’m not sure what is next. My life will be forever changed! So much to worry about especially finances and recovery for my loved ones! My husband is still in the hospital and they are already calling for payment! Makeup is my form of therapy and having you and so many more RUclipsrs I watch is very helpful! I know I won’t be able to purchase any of the new releases but please continue (for Mel and all of us struggling with different challenges)! I will end with Mel’s any whoo💕🥲
Sending you so much love you beautiful human
💞💞💞
Thanks for sharing Charlotte. I'm not a person that makes comments on content very often but what stood out to me was when you said that her subscribers might not know who to talk to about our sadness of losing Mel. Which is so true for me. I started watching make up content at the beginning of Covid -19 pandemic. And I discovered Mel first! 😃 I absolutely fell in love with her! ❤️ I anxiously waited for her content always. And then she was gone 💔 😩 My heart is heavy to Charlotte. Thank you again for sharing and helping me shed some tears of healing. Blessings for good health and happiness alwsy Charlotte. I love your content as well and love your accent. 🙏❤️
💖 thankyou, thankyou for talking about grief, for making it real and for making it ok. This video will help someone I know it. I didn't know Mel, I wish I had, but I know traumatic grief. I wish I could have watched this 22 years ago when I lost my brother. I pretended I was ok, I didnt want to cause my parents more upset, or upset my boyfriend who couldn't handle my grief. 18 months later I was so depressed and suicidal. It took me years to come to terms with my loss and rebuild myself. Now I talk about him freely, my children who never knew him, know their Uncle, I still cry and my husband holds me ( the boyfriend got kicked to the curb!), I can smile and remember. But all those years ago I needed to know it was ok to grieve. As always Charlotte your genuiness is heartwarming, please be kind to and look after yourself x
I really feel I don’t have anyone to talk about grief either about Mel or anything else cause they don’t understand how can I grief on someone I didn’t know personally and it just hurts..
the stupidest things like the new Wayne Goss palette I’m incapable of purchasing cause it just reminds me of her and I’m crying so hard everytime I talk about it or write about it…
Cause I should buy it exactly because of her and Wayne whom I also love but…
I can’t.
And a friend said “it’s just makeup” (no…it’s more than that to me).
I know makes no sense but it just seems wrong-doing:(
I’m sorry for everyone’s loss.
I’m still mourning a loss of an ex boyfriend that was my true love and he has been gone for 4 years coming this end of the month and I keep remembering him.
And anyone I’ve lost I can’t delete their mobile phone number even though I know they aren’t here anymore but I can’t…it’s like the last thing I have of them…I don’t know…does this make sense to anyone.
I feel like a crazy person crying 😢 everytime :(
Dear Charlotte, your video touched me deeply. I feel the same way. It is like things are misplaced and my routine, my whole day feels disrupted. Nothing feels right, putting on makeup doesn’t bring me joy. I tried to do it today and I picked up the Sisley powder which I have bought on Mel’s recommendation and my heart just sank. I grieve this loss of a person who was a part of my day. When I first realized what happened, after reading her husband’s post on Instagram, I was just also numb, like you. My husband, who never really cares about what and who I watch on RUclips, when he saw me staring at my phone, he asked me what happened. I told him what happened and his first reaction was: that amazing girl with the beautiful eyeshadow and the cool tattoos? you watched her every day, didn’t you? And that made me burst into tears. She may not have been a friend, but she was present in my life. She was part of my routine. And now I don’t have that. I can’t watch her videos right now and I feel weird watching RUclips. Thank you for doing this video. We all miss her. Sending you lots of love from Belgium. X
Miss Charlotte, in my experience there’s no real formula for grief. I’m glad you are giving yourself permission to grieve. It’s a strange thing grief and can hit anytime. But it seems to fade with time. I’ve experienced the complete loss of energy from grief. Rest. Be good to yourself. Sending love to you. Also, recovery of DMS from Instagram seems possible. ruclips.net/video/dFBQzclp1dQ/видео.html
Thinking of you x
You don’t know me ,but wanted to say I understand. I didn’t know Mel, but I tuned in to her videos all the time. I sobbed in the shower for a woman I didn’t know. For you it’s a huge loss. We will all miss her. I feel for her friends and family. I have not put on any makeup since. We are all human beings, and it’s important to recognise sadness, grief. It’s important to take time to heal. Sending you all my love 😍. It’s ok to not be ok.
It’s shows your beautiful soft caring side. Thinking of you all and all who knew here. Massive loss.
Sending a big virtual hugs 🤗