I refused to help my dead husband’s affair partner | Reddit Stories
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 12 сен 2024
- 👩⚕️ Easiest way to find a doctor EVER
Check out ZocDoc where you can find reviewed doctors FOR FREE 👉 bit.ly/OKOPand...
🏆 Want ad free podcast episodes? Join our Patreon 👉 / okopshow
✍️ Have a story? Join our subreddit and submit your story there for a chance to be featured! / okopshow
📞 or call us! 440-508-6567
👂 Listen to our podcast here! 👇
🎧 Spotify: open.spotify.c...
🎧 Apple: podcasts.apple...
r/BestofRedditorUpdates - AITAH for not helping a woman who had a baby with my ex husband get survivors benefits?
r/BestofRedditorUpdates - Family left me (18M) when they thought I wasn't my dad's son but now they want to get back in touch
Note: stories are often abbreviated, find the story at the top of the description
#redditstories #reddit #funnyredditposts
Imagine having a bastard affair baby and having the audacity to go to the wife you wronged asking for help💀
I’m still stuck on the audacity to ask another woman to care about your kids while saying though I could care less about your kid to that same mother 🤦🏼♀️ can’t tell if it’s audacity or just plain stupidity 💀
Don't blame the kid.
But the mother? Definitely the A hole.
OP - NTA
Sad but it up to the young lady to forgive her dad 🤦🏼♀️
NTA AP knew the situation when she chose to engage with another woman’s husband. Any HWW knows to get the money up front. He knew about the child at birth, but didn’t sign the bc? He knew about the didn’t set up a provision for the child? He could have bought an insurance policy and named the child as the beneficiary, but didn’t. Why? If the bm was so concerned about her child why didn’t she set up child support while the guy was living? Paternity could’ve and would have been established then. She chose not to…. So she and unfortunately the child are SOL.
I don't think the OP has any responsibility to take money away from her own child in order to pay for his affair child. NTA
First story: So the AP had 3 years to get court ordered child support established but chose not to until after the baby daddy was dead? And why didnt the dead ex marry his AP? 🤔 I have a feeling the AP was targeted by the ex husband because she was so naive.
Story #1:
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Get pregnant by a married man, and you deal with the consequences of having an affair baby.
OP is not the A-hole.
she is at this point to deny a dna test
She had years to get this kid tested and trying and get money. The legal way from this guy she chose not to this is on her. If o p didn't have the ex husband's child , there would be no one left to dna test.
@@AGirlNamedVan Nah, the homewrecker could go through the court pay compensation for knowingly having an affair and for the emotional distress of OP and request a kinship test with a few of the dad's adult relatives. At least that's in places that view a marriage as a contract and demand cheaters to compensate the innocent party.
It would cost more/be harder to recreate the genealogy or to exhume the body, but it can also be done, but miss gold-digger probably doesn't want to pay for that.
When my parents divorced, my father told the judge that he only wanted my 4 older siblings and not my little sister and I because we were. "Broken." (My sister and I both had spine surgeries when we were 11 &12 each with me getting 2 additional ones.) Of course, the judge didn't give him any type of custody, and the bastard when to New Mexico soon after. My sister and I didn't see much of him not like my older siblings throughout the next few years. It wasn't until 2 days before my 16th birthday that I found out that he had off himself while in a standoff with a swat team because he was a suspect along with his cousin in his great aunts disappearance and murder. Honestly, I couldn't have asked for a nicer gift.
I think in the first story. OP daughter shouldn't be forced to do an DNA test. Her body her choice. Its not her responsibility to deal with her dads affair child. OP mom can claim religious beliefs and the courts cant force her daughter to provide DNA.
To be honest, the lady just wants the money. That baby isn't going to see a penny from it.
That's what I thought too, because why did she never get any kind of paternity test while the man was still alive?? She wasn't thinking of her child then. And she was already in a situation with her other children's father, so it's not like she was some naive young thing.....@@ciobalina7445
I don’t necessarily agree that she’s punishing her ex-husband’s affair baby, I just think there’s a distinction between, “punishing someone’s baby for something they didn’t do,” and, “not actively taking care of someone’s affair baby.”
Exactly. There's a difference between punishing someone and not helping someone.
How is she punishing the baby? The mother chose to have the affair and then keep and raise the child. OP was responsible for her own child so the woman who had the affair with the ex should be responsible for her child/children.
The ex-husband and the affair lady did everything wrong. No one should come after the family who were shattered by everything the cheaters did to them.
Exactly💯
@@christenmorrison4474 I didn’t say that, Sam and John suggested that.
The mistress better find her baby a step-pappy!!!
Spat out my drink!
Wow that new one step pappy 😂😂😂 I like it.
I know that’s right! Not my problem fuck that!
Or just get a job. If she only put her energy into getting a job instead of sleeping around, she won’t be broke
Story one, she's not robbing the kid. She's just not making the process easier for the AP
Time for AP to get a full time job and stop sleeping around
I had a similar situation to the first story after my father passed away(my parents were divorced at the time) a woman came to my grandparents house and asked them to sign something stating they knew that my dad was the biological father of her son so she could get 1/3 of my dad’s death benefits. My grandparents told her they would only sign it if she got her son dna tested against my brother and myself to prove he was also my father’s son because they didn’t want to take away from the children they knew for certain were my father’s children and she never did it.
I was wondering about that! Like how it gets dibbied up between kids/households/etc.
He was not on the birth certificate, so he was not paying child support previously. Why does she want the money now?
Because it's so much easier to get Social Security survivors benefits than it is to pull child support from someone who may not want to pay. The deposit goes into your checking account every month like clockwork.
Also, the AP told the wife that he said he'd take care of the baby. Maybe she didn't have to demand CS because he was already doing so?
He probably was paying for everything.
Would be interesting if they are in a state where you can sue affair partners for having affairs. Do the DNA test then sue her. Just an option 2 for sticking it to her.
You just taught me something new ty !
Hawaii, Illinois, New Mexico, North Carolina, Mississippi, South Dakota, and Utah are the 6 states where you can claim "alienation of affection" caused by a 3rd party that breaks up a marriage.
I'm in Utah and that's not what I experienced at all.
If these two children are the ONLY surviving beneficiaries, then your daughter’s benefits will not be reduced by the addition of the affair baby. BUT if there is even one other beneficiary, then adding a third will substantially reduce your daughter’s benefits.
@@marleymorningstar3671thanks for the info. I am aussie , only heard about it because if reddit stories. I think its a good idea.
Dad and the affair partner are the AH. Everyone else is trying to figure out how to clean up the mess
DNA test OP: they are being told "forgive, it's family" yada yada. If they were truly family, his dad would not have left him like that! OP is completely justified in being upset and not forgiving the family. OPs dad was/is being very selfish
And I say, leave him/her....🤣🤣
The onus is on the deceased ex. He and affair partner had 3 years to rectify the child’s paternity. OP is not responsible to spend the time and effort for something that does neither involve her at all.
She should not be financially responsible for her ex’s affair child at all. The woman who had the affair with him chose to keep and raise the child knowing he was married. She should be solely responsible for her child now that he passed away. Just like OP is still responsible for her daughter.
Agreed. I can see the argument for the child being entitled to some of his estate, but I think the fact that the child came from an affair is good enough reason to negate that. The AP made her choices with full knowledge of the potential consequences. Now she must face those consequences.
I'm also wondering if the ex husband left an inheritance. Now the daughter probably got it all, but with the affair kid's DNA proven then she might need to give away half of it. I wouldn't want to lose my ex husband's money to a cheater tbh. I know the kid is innocent but it's his mum's fault for being born as a cheater kid so she's imo fully responsible to provide for the kid's future. And not by taking away the money from the divorced family you helped breaking.
@@Nathan_Bookwurmhe didn’t even have anything to be buried with so I don’t think there was any state, but this are SS benefits so it won’t come from OP
@@Karamarika especially given that she didn't push for his name on the birth certificate when he was alive, which would have avoided all the stress and complications she is facing now. She waited years, and until he was dead. She could have pushed for DNA testing as soon as she gave birth. Instead she waited years and after the guy was dead to try to confirm paternity.
She probably did so to protect her reputation, which she didn't seem to care about while sleeping with a married man. She decided protecting her image was more important to her than ensuring her child had some financial support. As a result, she played the F around and find out game with her kid's future, and lost unnecessarily.
No one was arguing that the mother should financially support the affair baby. The affair baby's mother was simply trying to qualify the child for Social Security survivors benefits.
I met my partner in middle school, we reconnected sometime last year thanks to my part time job taking me in to his work (we are now 30). We started flirting, it finally culminated in us making it official less than 2 weeks ago and everyone at his job already knows about it. Work gossip spreads fast AF. There’s no way people weren’t side eyeing the affair partner for her audacity
i'm so jealous of OP for having such an amazing Grandpa. never had one. i just got stuck with an evil father and zero nice grandpas.
It broke my heart, that grandpa is an absolute hero
The dna test one is a old story but I like hearing it. You should do the one about the girl who's dad divorced her mom and the mom had been rich. So he was trying to get her to use the money she got from her mom to get his nee family christmas presents. Dude had issues
story #1. NTA. she doesn’t owe her anything and could’ve came forward at any point for a dna or even asked the father when she realized she was pregnant to begin with. This was karma imo, but the poor child has to be in the middle of it because of his careless father’s actions.
No, I would not do a DNA test. And I resent you saying that the ex-wife was robbing the other woman.
STORY #1: NTA, but the affair partner's child suffers "sins of the father", as the old saying goes.
Exactly and the AP didn't give a crap about OP and her daughter.
@@BarelySleepingthat’s what I’m saying. Like I don’t understand why AP said that to her. Even if it’s what she truly felt, LIE!! You’re trying to get money out of this person for your child, why would you tell her that you have zero remorse and don’t care about her daughter???
Lots of mothers struggle, because of bad decisions. She's not special. It's why bad decisions are called family curses. Because it follows and affects the next generation the worst. She has to go through this to build the character she never had in the first place.
Ex is a funeral director. At one cemetery, there is a small room full of the ashes of the unclaimed deceased. Feels very heavy and very haunted until you just talk to them. It is SOOO sad and heartbreaking. 😢
Sam's Golden Rules of Marriage: 1) For every four years of marriage, you get a single hall pass, 2) If your spouse dies, you have to wait one month for every year you two were together before dating someone else. 3) Cheaters should be exposed. 4) Lies should be exposed.
EDIT - Clearly there's a lot of newbies here today. These above are all running jokes throughout the episodes. It's not that deep.
Lol very conflicting with each other rules, I guess we all need time to mature
@@ruddiko Clearly you don't watch the show haha
So, what does hall pass mean?? Does it mean cheating or poor behavior??
@@scarlet16moons5 It's a joke on the show about cheating.
Thank you I was starting to lose track of the 10 ComSamdments
I just subscribed a few days ago and listening to these videos while I do chores has been the best thing ever. I find myself reacting like "😮" and shouting "THATS BULLSHIT" lol.
I’m the same way! I usually listen while taking showers at night, I can only imagine what my neighbors think 😂
I do when I drive🤣🤣🤣
Chile lololol these stories be wild, I be made for real 😂
OP’s grandpa is amazing
I think all OP is saying in number 1 is "look, lady, I'm not helping you. Look elsewhere for help"
The affair partner needs to track down his other children, if he has any
The one thing that makes me say the OP isn't the ahole is that the affair partner could try going to another family member of the cheater ex. Her kid would just be the easiest one to confirm the relationship to the ex.
So, unless there are no other members of the ex's family (obviously wrote this before they said he only had a brother who is MIA), or if she already approached them and they refused, it feels a little crummy to go to the betrayed spouse and their kid.
Side note, I'm pretty sure she wouldn't be able to force the kid to provide DNA even once they become an adult. Typically you aren't forced to provide DNA like that except when determining child support but even then just between the child and their possible father who may have to pay for them. Not between kids and such.
Course, the second the affair partner said she didn't care how much she hurt the OP and OP's kids, she immediately made OP not the ahole regardless to me.
The grandpa in the story about the flawed DNA test is a fucking GOAT! Kind of made me tear up because I so wish I'd had a grandparent like that. Everyone deserves a family member like that who just cares about you and provide you that loving support.
I personally loved the “spill that tea” chant ): I bet alot of people did!
I’m not sure if it was suppose to, may have missed the origin, but it always reminded me of “move that bus” from extreme home makeover and brought back good childhood memories
Even though that show ended up being bad lol
Yeah it was cheesey but in an endearing way 😅. Idk why there was so much push back about it.
I’m actually so sad about it and was confused why people didn’t like it either 🤷♀️
Just wanted to leave some love for all of you. You'll never please everyone all the time. For what it's worth, I've really enjoyed watching the show evolve and change. You've all come so far and I'm proud of every one of you. And I liked the "spill that tea!" chant! Regardless you guys are stuck with me as a subscriber, and I can't wait to see what else you come up with!
I liked it too.
I couldn’t have said it any better!!
I liked it too
I wouldnt want my daughters dna on file. They pretend that they get rid of it, but they don't. The other mother and ex had plenty of time to get the paternity and birth cert sorted out themselves.
Story 2: NTA. I'm petty, I would've heard them out and then told them 'thanks for verifying everything I thought you'd say and making me feel better about the fact that I'M DISOWNING YOU.'
Honestly listening to these stories, I'm starting to think that when peoople tell me I'm cold.. they might be right.
Edit: I love the grampa!
Edit 2: This kid is too young to even know what to do in this situation let alone have to deal with all of this. This story just really broke me. Damn.
Edit 3: I keep responding as I'm listening to the story lol. Anywho, DON'T SHUT THE CLINIC DOWN, they're exposing clowns! XD
What a great episode of OKOP, two really good stories. Grandpa of Story #2 is amazing.
"But you're punishing the kid too."
The issue is, that if the kid gets money, the mother is likely going to be the one that reaps the benefits, not the kid.
I wish you guys could get ops grandpa on the show i bet that man has stories for days what a legendary badass!
That's wild. I wonder if the father will now get rid of and solely blame the eldest son now that they messed up the test twice already lol
The courts aren't gonna do a thing for the AP's child considering it's an ILLEGITIMATE child and the "FATHER" is dead.
23:00 NTA. The father and brother showed you how little you really mattered. They don't get to play the "family" card after abandoning and mistreating OP like that. F them.
“When a ship is going through a storm man try to keep everyone safe and steer clear, rats just wanna run to someplace dry”. Daaamm
NTA #1 Id have said no too. A hard pass. Reap what you sow.
I wouldn’t want anything to do with that homewrecker or her kid
Those hats are getting more and more beat up with every episode 😂
Hey guys, I’ve been watching you show every day for over a year now and was wondering if I’m your oldest fan. I’m 67M. If so I want you to know that as a gay, black, single adoptive father and grandfather you guys rock! (This includes Riley and Sophia!)
I love the spill that tea. People don’t comment on things that are good very often, but people do comment on things they don’t like. Everyone has their accounts catch phrase or little thing. That’s one of yours and it’s great
I love when you all say “Spill That Tea!” Please keep it.
I for one loved "spill that tea" I'm definitely going to miss it but I'm happy you guys are attentive and read comments and try to work with people on their likes and dislikes in your content. I love you guys and have been watching your videos for awhile now make sure to keep doing what youre doing but dont lose what you love to do in your content it separtes you and make you guys you so make sure to always stay true tto yourselves first. Sending lots of love from PEI 💕💕💕💕💕
Am I the only one who liked it when they said “Spill that tea!”? 🥺
Aw Riley is too sweet. His future partner is going to be very lucky.
I loved "spill that tea." Also, I feel like "no sex" is too far on the opposite side. Yes, you guys got cringe with it occasionally by taking it too far but cutting out all sex talk has just made you guys too cautious. I think it takes away from not just the show, but I feel like it takes away some of your guys' spark and joy in the show. I've been binging way too much OKOP lately and you guys used to laugh so much more! I'd say just have Sophia in the room, and when she starts cringing, is when you've gone over board 😂 you all are amazing! Stop letting the haters dictate your joy ❤
I agree 100%
I agree on your second point, but I am relieved they got rid of the "spill that tea." It was so loud and jarring. Plus it overshadowed the stories too much. And doing it more than once in an episode (or worse yet, in a story) got old really fast. I was listening to an episode in the car when we were driving, and it was the only time my husband complained about the episode.
On your second point, I can understand why they took it out (ads, potential ToS issues, etc), but I sure do hate it when youtubers self censor. That is yt's fault for being so stupidly draconian around language.
@Karamarika I get what you're saying with "spill that tea" being a bit jarring. I loved how it made a VERY clear definition when a new story was starting. It brings me back to it if I've gotten distracted while they are wrapping up a story.
As for the self censoring, I totally get it if they're doing it for YT policies. Makes no sense to put in all the work they do only to get their content taken down. To me, it has sounded like they're responding to their commenters. If that's the case, I hope they don't let it affect how much fun they're having with the podcast. They are so fun to watch, and I love their takes on the stories ❤️
I love it when you guys say "spill that tea"
Riley is so sweet! I wish more men felt the same. Gentle heart and wanting to love on someone. ❤
Affair partner? Nope, you don’t get a single thing!
The story with Grandpa just got better and better! What a guy!
My heart goes out to young dude and his grandpa but I’m happy to learn that grandpa is a G. I believe in karma as well and I’ve experienced finding out a relative was not actually related. Between my heart and my culture, I don’t believe in abandoning ANYONE because adults behaved badly. I’m still looking for my niece, my brother’s unclaimed child because I want to love her. I have cousins that we found out later, we’re not blood but that means nothing to me because we shared life, childhood and culture. Even in the face of new information, I’m glad my family takes us all in. We definitely pick up strays because that’s what happens when your heart is good. OP is not stray and has never been a stray because his grand dad is an OG. I lost my grand parents but if OP’s grand dad wants an additional granddaughter, I’m here for it and I’m willing to be one of his grand g’s because I have a lot to learn from grand pops. I just might become a better person.
Not the AH at all. Affair partner is entitled to nothing, especially when she’s not even remorseful.
I love "spill that tea", bring it back with guest host pls lol
Story 2: that OG Grandpa...🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥! Let's fucking go! He's a real one for sure!
I love “spill that tea!”
Does anyone else feel the urge to also make a tinfoil conspiracy hat? Lol
She did this to herself. I’d never give her a cent!
Why should an affair kid be entitled to benefits ? Don't help the cheater, why should you?
2nd story- OP is proof of an affair. That is why the father can forgive the wife over and over and over and over again for affairs but having a child that is a result of an affair is undeniable proof that cannot be denied.
Sam's tin foil hat looks like it's been through the ringers lol
Johns locks are very impressive. Grow on!
Were people really hating "spill that tea?" 😅😭 ..bring it back!
Why didn’t the AP confirm paternity when she gave birth?
They cannot force her to do the DNA.
I don't think that OP in the case of the mistress knowing because the mistress should have made sure that the father put his name on that birth certificate and it knowledge that child. They could have done that without the wife finding out. So there's no excuse on her part not to make sure that that child was covered. Secondly, if she has something in his handwriting or text messages that he has sent her acknowledging the child, she can most likely establish fraternity that way because he acknowledged the child and he was taking care of the child so she has receipts of things He has bought the child. There are other ways that she can establish paternity.
I think they still need an DNA to get social security benefits
I believe in most states the man needs to agree, so maybe he didn't agree. Maybe he didn't really believe it was his but, basically, he didn't acknowledge the child, which means he was not willing to support it as he said. (He probably didn't realize all the ramifications...). This whole thing is really a shame.
@@balaia29 The birth certificate would be enough. It indicates acknowledgement by the father. For example, if a married woman puts her husband's name on the birth cert but he is not the father, he is still deemed to be the legal father and responsible for the child. Same with an adoption. The new, adoptive parents are put on a revised birth certificate and it is as legally binding as if the child is a biological child.
Someone having to suffer the consequences of someone else’s actions (even a child) is deeply unfortunate but ultimately, not OP’s problem. It falls on the now deceased garbage disposal of a human being and the affair partner. Hopefully she can figure something out but she needs to turn to her support system, if she has one. If not, well….🙃
I wanna hear spill that tea 😢
The grandpa story was your best one EVER!!!!
It's not the ex-wife's responsibility to make sure her then-husband's love child is provided for.
Gotta say, wasn't expecting that outcome. You could probably also sue the clinic
Honestly, I liked it when you all yelled "Spill that tea!" I thought it was funny! But really, I love this channel regardless.
I wonder if gramps has to also be quiet or if he can spill the beans because that 2nd story sounds like a great book lol!
The affair partner had two years to get a DNA test after he divorced his wife. If she was so concerned about her son getting money. She had plenty of time to get him labeled as the father.
Story #1- other woman is literal definition of FAFO. She had at least 2 years after kid was born to prove paternity and didn't. Sucks to be her. OP's daughter is not required to get the test if she doesn't want to and I honestly don't blame her for refusing. #2- OP has every right to refuse to reconnect with Dad. If was an AH move for him to separate the kids in the first place. Kids don't ask to be born, if anyone is to blame it's the parent who screwed around.
Story 1: Affair baby. I couldn't imagine having to sit my already emotionally hurt 14 year old daughter down to explain how her father had an affair and there's a child involved. Then having to tell her that the mistress wants her to take a DNA test to prove the boy is his son. This on top of his dying as well. Mom is not the A.H. It's not the child's fault but it's not the daughter's fault either. Maybe one day she'll want to know and have the DNA test done. I agree with Mom about allowing her daughter to decided when she is ready, if ever.
Story 2:Dad left son behind: Go Grandpa!!! I glad someone had this young man's back. If Dad could walk out on him after 15 years that easily, then how could Dad have loved him at all? Pretty much everyone turned their backs on him and now expects him to welcome them with open arms? That's not how it works.
I love spill that tea 😭😭😭😭😭
29:59 The grandpa is an OG
Bliss that man
been watching you guys for f few weeks, now its THE FIRST STOP on my youtube morning listen! Yall are fucking awesome!!! LOVE the foil hats, cracks me up every time!!!!
Mine too and also Charlotte my petty queen.
@@clanogdenomg I also love Charlotte Dobre! She’s amazing ❤
When you get knocked up by a married man and he died without you taking any steps re paternity you need to take responsibility and raise the kid yourself. The cheated widow owes you SQUAT.
I’m confused what was OP getting a settlement for? Is it for the paternity test mix up?
How do you fuck up a DNA test that bad?!? Also I ASPIRE to be that great of a grandparent, all the best to that grandpa!
DNA OP: Dad and AP could've gotten a DNA test 2 years prior to his death and right after the finalization of his divorce.
AP's now emergency/issues should not be visited on the ex and the daughter. If it wasn't a pressing issue before, it's not now. It's not his ex's job to keep taking care of her ex's mess ups.
The late husband should have legally recognizing the birth. Additionally, the mother of that child had plenty of time to establish paternity.
I think it's okay to have boundaries and not submit your child to hurtful situations in an already difficult time.
I'm sure social security has had these situations before. They can handle it.
I liked the "spill that tea!" 😢
I love the tin foil hat times😂
But can the older brother can now sue the lab?
She has no legal option to compel a dna test . No crime was commited you just can’t force someone to Offer dna.
Never punish the child and every child has a right to know who are their biological parents.
Well the other woman isn't paying for her affair. She didn't get money for child.
The cheater punished her child for getting with that married man. Its not op responsibility for the kid 🤷♀️
When bodies go unclaimed they're cremated and buried in the potters field. Every state has one. This is also where they were doing mass burials when a bunch of people were dying during the pandemic and they needed to bury them.
That amazing grandpa in the last story, is he single? Cuz I got 2 very different but wonderful grandma's who are single. 😘
The state offering a cremation is such a gift. They are like 1200 bucks typically (where I live)
Absolutely …. Family is toxic and chosen family can be just as supportive
I love this grandpa.
She knew what she was getting into with a married man
Don’t feel sad, Sam. I appreciate how you guys watch the comments and make adjustments to your podcast to better suit your audience. BUT commenters can forget that you guys are real people with feelings. Don’t let A-holes bring you down. More people like your podcast than don’t. (Sorry John if this comment isn’t mean enough to get you fired up. 💪)
Story #2. Unfortunately this young man drew the short straw in the parent lottery. Neither parent has any empathy for him and were/are emotionally abusive. TG for GF who did what no one would do-CLAIM the young man, protect him and call out their BS. I love that he followed through on his settlement despite the emotional, blackmail and the added Karma bonus