Insomnia insight
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- Опубликовано: 23 июл 2024
- In this episode we find inspiration from the world of economics to see what the fundamental problem with CBTi is - implied controllability. We look at the two core techniques of CBTi, sleep restriction and stimulus control, and see how we can replace them with a timeless sleep window and befriending wakefulness and get to the place where we want to be - restful sleep and peace of mind!
Do you have trouble sleeping? Can’t sleep? Have questions about insomnia or sleep?
Please submit here and I will try to respond soon in an Open class episode.
www.thesleepcoachschool.com/h...
Would you like to work with a me and/or learn more? Awesome! Here are some great options:
- The Self Coaching Master Program www.thesleepcoachschool.com
- BedTyme, a sleep coaching app for iOS and Android.
- My book Set it & Forget it (great place to start!) or This is Natto (if you want a deep dive into the mind) on Amazon.
The self coaching program is perfect if you like learning through video and want to join a group on your journey towards sleeping well.
BedTyme is ideal if you like to learn via text and have a sleep coach in your pocket.
Not sure where to start? Check out these playlists!
This is natto - the perfect place to start learning!
• This is Natto - Start ...
Success stories - if you need hope and inspiration, this is for you.
• Success stories
Insomnia insight - a list of every single episode.
• Playlist
Talking insomnia - guests with trouble sleeping or experts share their stories / tips.
• Talking insomnia
Hypnic jerks, hypnic awareness and other common issues.
• Hypnic jerks and more.
Fatal insomnia - for those concerned about ffi and sfi.
• Familial and sporadic ...
The self coaching model
• The model
Best!
This content does not constitute medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment, and should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or other qualified healthcare providers. 
Развлечения
I love this! I did traditional CBT-I once and it really increased my stress around sleep. It’s nice to hear this kind of messaging from an expert that’s it not a one size fits all solution. Thank you.
Anytime Julie! It took a while, but after hearing your story so many times I realized there were some problems with traditional CBTi! Thanks for sharing and the support!!
This is absolutely true! I think it not only applies to good sleep, but to emotional/mental health.
Thank you Steven so much for this comment!! And, I believe this 100%, peace of mind comes from seeing that we have no direct control of our thoughts and emotions.
I found this video so helpful. I've just finished a course of traditional CBT-I including sleep restriction and stimulus control and while my sleep has improved massively I have wondered how to move on from it. People with insomnia want to be like "normal" sleepers which isn't, in my case, sitting in another room to read or getting in and out of bed throughout the night. It would have been helpful if at the end of the course they do what you do and emphasise that you cannot control sleep, regardless of what you do.
Hi Lucie, and thanks so much for this kind comment. I’m super glad to read that sleep has improved massively, this is fantastic and thanks to your willingness to learn and change habits and finding courage within, well done 👍👍!
But yes, you bring up this important point of how it’s so helpful to point out that although you often have to make some effort to change an insomnia pattern, you want to arrive at a place where there’s no effort, no rules and sleep isn’t even something you think about!
I think though if you just spend a little time on this channel you’ll find all you need for that last part of your journey! Be well and stay in touch!
Way to go for 👍
Traditional CBTI didn't work for me - to much focus and control.( Made me anxious and more restless when I went back to bed)
Thanks for this Dr Daniel
You’re not alone Rosie, so glad this made sense 😊
loved that Daniel!
Thank you so much Pat!! I just realized it didn’t send you that email I meant to, just did!
My CBT-i provider from almost 20 years ago replaced the name "sleep restriction" with "sleep window". Sleep restriction might be harmless in an academic setting but when discussing with someone who is suffering, I don't know that words such as "restriction" are helpful. My guess is that my provider recognized that and changed the name when talking with her clients.
Also, personally, I never liked stimulus control. I always thought that it made it too much work and required too much monitoring. I either meditate in bed when I am awake during my sleep window. Or I daydream which I supposed is a form of meditation also. I will only get out of bed if I get frustrated. Otherwise, I don't get out of bed if I am feeling comfortable. And like you have been saying recently, I don't associate any value to the outcome. If I fall asleep, great. Otherwise, whatever.
If you ask me, there isn't really a flaw with CBTi conceptually. I think the flaws are around 1) the name sleep restriction (and all the calculating sleep efficiencies and what not and 2) the way people are being taught how to use stimulus control.
Makes so much sense adobo, thanks for sharing 👍
Hey Daniel-
Wanted your reply here on youtube. I was sleeping better (still having to take sleeping pills) and once I have one rough night it seems to turn into 2, 3, 4 etc. I continuously wake up throughout the night or I have trouble falling asleep altogether. I want to stop feeling guilty for taking sleeping pills and hope to one day not have to rely on anything for a good nights rest. Every time I think I'm turning the corner I end up back at the same place. Can you help me?
Hi Mackenzie and thanks for sharing this and for the questions.
I think what’s perhaps the most important here is to really think about why you’ve been sleeping better. Therein lies the key to sleeping well and to not struggle with sleep! Let’s take a look at this analogy!
Imagine this fictional person who is not willing to lose even a minute of sleep. That is completely unacceptable to them! They do anything they can and can think of to make sure they don’t lose a single minute of sleep.
This person will have a ton of insomnia! Because imagine the pressure when you have to make sure you don’t lose even a minute of sleep.
Imagine on the other hand a person that is ok with not sleeping much. They will actually sleep well because there’s no pressure at all.
When you slept better, it was in fact because you were more willing to be awake at night.
It may sound kind of odd that it always is that!
Because even if you’re super sleepy, if you are very worried (in other words not willing to lose any sleep) then you still won’t sleep.
So weird as it sounds, when you sleep well it is because you’re more OK with not sleeping well. You have started to become more like the second person.
And when you become more unattached, when you are OK with having both a night of great sleep and a night a little sleep, then you truly are on the path towards never struggling with sleep again!
This is the thing - it may have seemed like you slept better because you “got a grip on the insomnia” or you had some control. But it was actually the opposite!
And this is also why every time you turn the corner you end up having some trouble. Because when you think you did something to turn the corner, then you will feel a need to do something to when you have trouble and the more things we do, the more we try to have control, the more insomnia we get!
As for the sleeping pills, I think a really helpful way to not feel guilty is to think about why you’re taking them. Remember that the brain always wants us to be safe. It can get confused though and think that being awake is a threat, and then it asks us to do something to keep us safe like take medications. So here’s the thing: taking medication comes from a place of self-care. It’s nothing but you trying to take care of yourself. So really nothing to be hard on yourself for!
Hope this made sense Mackenzie!!
Hey Daniel, I've been getting poor sleep lately and I don't really understand why:
I will fall asleep thinking I'm "gonna have a good night of sleep" and I wake up anticipating that I had a good night only to find that I got light, unrefreshing sleep.
Also kinda unrelated: for the past 2 years, I've done this thing where I "observe the results" from the night by just seeing how refreshed I look and I'd like to know, what the best way to let go of this habit is. On good days, it boost my confidence immensely to see that I've done well, but on bad days it practically makes me depressed and feel like I've failed even though sleep is always a fail if you're subconsciously trying to control it.
What is your advice for these two problems?
I've also just been feeling very strange in general. Like something is wrong but I know it's just my anxiety and frustration from not sleeping coming out in different ways. How do I accept that I might feel off on days where I don't sleep very well?
Hi Ellie, sorry to read these lines but glad you’re here. I think there’s much here that would be helpful for the community to go into depth on, I’ll reply at length in next Open class!!
@@thesleepcoachschool8192For sure, I sent it!
Perfect! Today or Friday!
You should write a child's book on helping kids sleep better :)
You know I’ve thought about that!! My wife and I am actually developing an app for parents, it’s going to be called Waby Saby. There’s this Japanese philosophy around the beauty of imperfection that we are naming it from. But a book would really be cool too... on the short list!!
@@thesleepcoachschool8192 look forward to it!
The flaw is getting out of bed. In my experience, you want to stay in bed and experience those emotions and feelings. once the body realizes that the bed is a place for peace it will sleep again
Facing what we have tried to escape is the way indeed, thanks for sharing 😊
I implemented the CBT-i procedures and they are very healthy additions to life.
However, they didn't cure my insomnia in the slightest.
Exactly what soo many have shared here… thanks for commenting and letting those who are new to the community know that Cbti is very tricky…
Hope you find some helpful teaching here that is different. Thanks for being here!
Hey Daniel, my sleep really hasn't been getting much better since I sent you my question a little while ago. From what I've come to realize from watching some of your interviews with former insomniacs is that they let go of their sleep anxiety by mainly letting go of the idea that sleep can be controlled and that it has to be a certain way. So for that reason I feel like I should stay away from the internet so that I cant look up solutions for my insomnia. I'm going to just sit with myself and my issues. Maybe after a month it'll start to resolve. Do you think this is a good idea?
Hi Ben, sorry to hear you’re not sleeping much better, but I think you’re onto something really important here. It’s so true what you say, the key is to let go of the idea that sleep can be controlled, 100%!
If you end up searching for ways to control sleep when you’re online, then it could really help to go offline. As long as it doesn’t feel like a “punishment” and you’d miss it. In that case just staying away from the part of the internet that’s keeping your from sleeping well may be more helpful.
But most importantly, you’re seeing the path!! Let us know how things go 👍