Thank you.. for all you do! My hearts so torn from years and years of Draculas! I'm feeling so broke, lost and empty! Wondering why, what and where am I going with my life!
Thank you Lisa. This is very necessary esp no dehumanising aspect out there. My dad had a narcissistic personality ..buy I feel for him. He's passed now. But I'm now dealing with the fall out within me..to be honest my whole family dynamic went wonky as a result of my dad and my mum to a lesser degree. Be interesting to know more about children of narcissistic parents etc. Btw where is the handbook?
Thank you so much for the video! Loved it. Just noticed that you mentioned not only solar plexus as dysunctional to narcissists but also throat chakra. Could you explain that as well? Appreciate a lot.
I've been with a narcissist for 20 years now. Hard for me to even say that. I only woke up 2 years ago and have been taking my power back and healing my inner child. It's so very hard for me as a sensitive and a Taurus to own my part in this, but I think I have done that now. Change is hard for me still and in my 53 years on this planet, I have never been on my own. I've been doing a lot of solar plexus work as well and I am finally becoming an empowered, sovereign human. Like my son tells me, "Mom, you are one of the strongest people I know. It is time for you to rise." ❤️ And that's exactly what I plan on doing. Thanks in large part to your amazing work here on RUclips Christina, I am getting stronger by the day. I can't thank you enough. There aren't even words. Much love to you always. ❤️ 🙏
@@ChristinaLopes Christina, don’t even know how you have time to reply to half the comments you do. Thank you making time for those of us that view you as a spiritual mentor. I’m blessed to have found you. 🙏
Amen to that. I’m also a sensitive and a Taurus so I totally understand what you are saying. Sending you a virtual hug for taking your power back and healing.
@@tangledroots9078 Thanks for the support ❤️ I truly need all the positive vibes I can absorb. I'm also having some health issues. Funny how the Universe works...I had surgery in September, broke my elbow in January, and just had surgery again 2 weeks ago. I almost feel like I'm being punished, but I know I'm not. I'm supposed to be learning something. Idk? Grace and patience is my guess. I've always been a sensitive or empath and I have been traveling this road for awhile. But I didn't truly get it until I began meditating. Wow. Wish I had started that years ago, but divine timing is perfect, so who am I to question it. ❤️ Thanks again for your kind words.
Who here has been both a narcissist and a co-dependant once in their lives, and is now realising that both are, most likely, symptoms of very low self-esteem? 😑
I have definitely swung from one to the other, this aspect of myself i find quite difficult to understand, i think its like this empath/HSP>>empowered empath>>narcissist, if an empowered empath get a bit to full of themselves it is easy to become narcissistic, I have visualized the energy flow into my center as an experiment and find that it brings trouble and difficulties. what Christina said about the black hole 3rd chakra is uncannily exact in explaining the visualisation i have experimented with. if in your empowerment from a disempowered empath gains to much momentum you can over shoot and end up narcissistic, you go too far and of course plummeting back into you previously disempowered state may occur. I think once this is understood a more slow gentle approach to empowering your inner empath is ideal, so that you dont overshoot into narcissism. does this make sense to you ???
My best friend ( I thought she was) for four years has been hurting me and treated me like shit, it toke me so long to realize what is happening, hardest for me to cut her off, but have to
I was wondering that exact thing after watching this video, thinking I'm not sure if I should decrease the size of my solar plexus or take my power back, or both.
I appreciate you mentioning the dehumanizing of narcissist. My mother is one and I find it difficult to reconcile her toxic behavior and her as a person that requires grace. No one is 100% perfect or 100% flawed and it's important to keep that in mind.
This is SO key to name the humanity of anyone who presents on the spectrum of narcissism. I was hesitant to watch any vids about the subject because of that…and now I feel I am so much more understanding already and open to the healing capacity from exploring my trauma…as otherizing someone who I have suffered around is simply doing that to myself! As well as them. So key, and so healing to have this as the first point in vid. Thanks Cristina!!
Empath and the Narcissist An all so common relationship dynamic Starts as a whirlwind, ends up in panic The empath truly has love and compassion The narcissist requires constant validation The narcissist feels truly empty inside Afraid to be alone in their darkened mind Afraid of the voices in their head Believing they're worthless, better off dead The empath has nothing to gain They build you up to shut off your pain What the empath doesn't realize Is the narcissist's inability to empathize The narcissist thinks it's a power struggle The empath has all their feelings to juggle Pushing and pulling, a constant fight Waiting for the next rage to ignite Idealize, devalue, and discard The narcissistic calling card The empath is tired of insulting their soul They awaken and take back their control Narcissist moves on to another fixation Unable to live without validation Never to blame, ego increases While the empath is left to pick up the pieces
The Narcissist's confession My biggest fear has come true I have been found out My ways of spreading fear with rage Failed to keep victims in doubt Could no longer keep up the facade Gaslighting them to relax All the lies have come back to haunt With proof and relevant facts Kept hiding the damaged child underneath Afraid to show the shame Needed validation from everyone They were all to blame Took no accountability in my actions Even though I was at fault I thought I was acting grown up Without the emotional maturity of an adult A constant need for money and power I must have it all! Without it I feel worthless Probably my biggest downfall The voices inside are too much to bear They tell me I'm not worth anything Ego mask has been torn away Will someone else please worship me?
I am a trauma therapist and healer, I work with those who have cause trauma impacts through harmful behaviors as well as those who have been harmfully impacted. I have been known as the “narcissist whisper” because I have understood this perspective for many years. Being raised by a narcissist as a strong willed empath will help you understand what’s happening on a deeper level. I very much appreciate this information and your opening statement that it is possible and important to be able to talk about these issues without dehumanizing others! Thank you ✨🙏🏼
Totally respect that everyone can have their perspective and I am grateful that I have the capacity to work with these individuals who create harm by their actions because otherwise our entire world would be very dark place. People like me will continue to work with them in order to make sure more harm doesn’t happen and that they can contribute to the world in a better (at least not harmful) way. Hopefully you have a space where you do not have to be harmed by them. 💞🙏🏼✨
@@jessicarenner4451 Jessica, I spent so much time healing and ascending myself into the best version of myself when I met a girl that seemed like she would do anything for me. Months later I realized I was spending so much energy healing her that I was losing my focus on my own goals and dreams and she was getting stronger in hers (I met her as someone who didn’t have her life together at that point). I just want to know, on a seller level was that my way of avoiding work on myself and focusing on the healing of another at the cost of myself?
@@bobbyfrank9859 I’m not sure that I can answer that. I feel that if you are asking about it then maybe you have that answer within you. It seems that you have great insight and understanding for yourself. I am glad you are able to continue to do you healing work! I find that for myself no matter how much I heal and understand things within myself I am always learning more and go further and deeper within myself. Things are moving in a forward spiral motion and we get to continue to work with things on many various levels. I do not believe we are ever “done” with something and that it will never show up again. It is simply we continue to recognize and move through it at different energies and frequencies. Hope this helps! 🙏🏼
@@bobbyfrank9859 Imagine getting an answer to your question that would really trigger your anger. In the response you have to that triggering answer you might find you've answered your own question. I hope this helps. (This worked for me recently, not the knee jerk reaction of course but the thought through response I read back after writing it as a comment and then I saw it.)
I love the way you presented this. Mental and personality disorders are no joke and the way some youtubers treat it is very sad. I was raised by a narcissistic mother and been in a narcissistic relationship. It's hard because they're still people, but you still need to know how to protect yourself. Thanks again Christina may the universe bless you.
Amazing video!! My dad was a narcissist. I spent many years avoiding him. He died of cancer almost 2 years ago and I’m barely starting to heal all that hurt. I meditate and visualize him as a toddler, happy, full of wonder and joy, before life had its way with him. It’s very healing!! Thank you for this extremely insightful video!!
Thank you Christina for talking about dehumanization. My husband and I struggled with pretty severe codependency, and in my search for healing I found so much “pointing the finger”. Yes, my husband had many narcissistic traits, but I still loved him and I knew that together we could heal this wound. When I switched to releasing the need to “fix” him, to healing myself and stepping into my own power, things really began to expand for us. He followed my lead, and we are so much stronger now than before, and than our families before us. Thank you so much for your help with my journey 🙏🏻
He followed your lead so there was awareness and willingness to heal on his part. Without these things it feels like a dead end street. I am very happy for the both of you ❣️❣️
One thing about NARCISSIST thats very annoying and damaging is that they dont want communication on an normal adult level... For example avoiding answering questions, no empathy... they only care about thier perspective and want to dominate at all levels... So yeah the best is probably no contact, cant even resolve little things with them.
This sounds a lot like the dehumanizing language that Christina is addressing in this video. When you learn to assert your power, raise your voice, and to not let others drain you, even a severe narcissist cannot harm you. You are stronger than any negative force. ✌️
@@jasminepolson we can have empathy and compassion for the narc at the same time as having the same for ourselves. I still love my narc as a human and wish him the ability to get better, but I do that at a very far distance.
As a self-described "narc," first: thank you for noticing that we are deeply wounded PEOPLE. Thanks to Christina for raising the general public's awareness. Narcs need to "win." It ain't right, but it is. Once you understand this, you'll know better how to relate to them. WE CAN'T WIN if people dehumanize us. Those who dehumanize us (using the word "narc," for example) keeps us from seeking help. I have some aspects of narcissism and also of codependence. Codependents were rewarded for giving away their power. I was rewarded for taking others' power. The WOUND is the same
I feel like I've been waiting for this video my whole life. To learn that narcissists can heal (and are!) almost brings me to tears. I never want to be in a friendship again with my former best friend who abused me, but I still care. Also for a lot of our leaders and people in power positions.
Same here! And like you, I never want my old N friend near me again but have wanted to find compassion, understanding and forgiveness in my heart for her. And the insights in this video help a lot in that regard. At this point, I worry about her adoptive daughter and want more than anything for my friend to be happy and fulfilled if only so that she does not do serious damage to her little girl.
This is a topic that I've been struggling with and here's why: I consider myself to be a Narcissist at times, not by the definition that I take away power from others but from a perspective based on the fact that I can feel that I'm special and even better than others. I deeply want to be recognized for my social skills, the way I look, what I can do. I have felt entitled to not have to go by the rules because "I know better". I also consider myself to be a sensitive, co dependant empath at times. I get value from being needed, from helping, giving out advice, doing things for other people, to a point where I forget about myself in the process of it. (so, actually quite selfish ) In both scenarios my sense of worth is given through external situations. In both scenarios there's a fear of b e i n g that gets disguised from d o i n g. I have a hard time with the idea of not providing value to people in any social setting. I let the things I can do define me. In situations where I don't feel seen or heard, I feel worthless. So... from what I got from this video, those 2 roles seem to be described as a case of either/or. But to me, these roles are both a reflection of a low self esteem. Both can't accept who they are, both are afraid to show any imperfection. They simply manifest according to the energy they're responding to. Anyway, just my personal experience. Does this make sense?
1st step is awareness,I am glad u typed your truth!do what Christina told you.I wish I could give this video to my younger sister but I cut all the ties with her as soon as I got confirmed she was a narcissist,I am neither of them,I don't give my power away to anyone.I loved her so much and I had eyes and brain to see the difference and I couldn't help as narcissists don't change by advice but by their willingness.I had no choice and now I am healed .But I am not going back to her bz that's not a wise thing to do. There's a thing about narcissists,people come to know sooner or later.And people run away. you disclosing your truth is very admirable!that's the 1st step .And if u feel guilt, empathy at all for others then u don't lie in that category, only u will know ! as per i know they don't accept the truth but Christina said there are narcissists who changed by accepting the truth,and she is beyond wisdomful ,so she couldn't be wrong!
That's an interesting perspective. I feel like I've played both roles all throughout life. I'm glad you brought it up. You hit the nail on the head that both forms of expression stem from low self-esteem. That seems to be my experience at least. Also, I admire Christina's approach to both sensitives and narcissists. Dehumanizing anybody does absolutely nothing for the individual to heal. I'm glad that you introduced this topic with compassion.
you help others for helping others or u help others for urself to show others that you did something for them? Bz u said u are an empath as well! If you help others for helping others you are not a narcissist .My sister is! She helped me beyond one should do ,cleaning home,doing dishes,everything and she always said to me She likes it but she hated to do it ,just to get the validation she was doing it,that's not empathic. She was a covert narcissist ,which means she had very low self esteem,but she couldn't accept it ,I fought it in her mind,even when people praised her,she felt good for some time and started doubting it.I know too much about narcissists. once my sis saw a boy crying and she felt such a strong sense of talking to him,to help him,I asked her 'you felt bad for him?' she replied to me 'no.' I got shocked ,then i asked her why did u want to talk to him then?that's not empathic.And she got angry because she couldn't listen to the question that exposed her truth.I was simply asking why did u want to talk to him then? All is low self esteem,she wanted to talk to him to help him not feeling the pain for him for validation. I just hope Christina keeps making more videos on healing narcissism as not only narcissits are wounded ,they are wounding others as well.And the victim gets healed but narcissists don't as no one talks about healing narcissists!
One of the key points to understand here is that everyone needs to heal by their selves. You can talk with a person and give some orientation, but empaths and sensitive people need to remember they can't heal others, is not their job to heal the narcissist. Also a main difference is that narcissists mostly cause damage to others with their actions, and codependent people mostly cause damage to their selves, so the consequences of their unbalances aren't the same.
I don't know that I agree. Codependents also cause damage to others because when they constantly need to "save" others, the can actually end up being enablers of others. Meaning, they can delay the other person's healing. This is most notorious with addicts. If an addict has a codepdent around, they'll likely take longer to heal the addiction bec the codependent is there to constantly save them.
@@ChristinaLopes yet, the co dependent isnt abusive, doesnt TAKE PLEASURE in others' misery, is not manipulstive, does not gaslight, does not minimize, project, devalue, dehumanize the closest ppl, discard others with NO EMPATHY or consideratin of their feelings; Co dependents dont love bomb, lie, deliberately manipulate; they dont hv intimacy issues, they are authentic, they hv integrity, they dont "breadcrumb" you, they dont use flying monkeys, word salad and create a fake future in others' minds; Co dependents dont leave you a broken empty shell of the person you once was, questioning your reality at each moment you breathe; they dont make you want to harm youself physically, they dont use smear campaigns against you when they break up with you; They dont create a c-ptsd in you, making it impossible for you to leave your house, hv panic/anxiety attacks, they dont use your - or worse - THEIR - children to control you. And this is just from the top of my head. But I agree they are deeply wounded souls, and dehumanizing them, with or without their awareness to it, is just doing what they did to you. And YOUR SOUL deserves better than to go that low. I appreciate myself enough to know this is an amazing person, that I couldnt help - but it wasnt my job to begin with.
@@ChristinaLopes I do agree with you completely regarding my responsibility, my co dependency, my enabling. I think my narc ex is one of the most and truly amazing ppl ive met thus far.
Yes I agree, a really sensible explanation ....( the third chakra is opened too much so it syphones energy a black hole that sucks everything around it.) Personal power and self image
I lived with one for 9 long years and even after I decided to leave him I didn’t know what narcissism was. I’ve learned about it when I met someone special and I got my spiritual awakening and kundalini . That’s when I went back to that era and I made my math.
Christina I can’t tell you enough how these last two videos have helped us empaths. I broke free from a long marriage to a narcissist and dove head on into self healing now for almost 4 years. I’m feeling great and would like to begin dating however like most of us in the situation I’m a little afraid of not recognizing a narc while dating. A video for empaths entering the dating world would be a great Part 3 🙏 I am so thankful for your work . It truly has been life changing. I love you ❤️
I have never forgotten something my late Mom said to me when I was about 3 years old, and I was pointing my finger at someone and complaining about how " horrible" he was. She demonstrated to me that every time you point your finger at someone, there are three fingers pointing back at you. I am now in my 60s, and it is still a powerful reminder.
Narcissism and co-dependency exist on a spectrum as well, and we can all have them to some degree. Thank you for bringing awareness to the spiritual aspects of the dynamics. The more we know, the more we grow!🌱
This brought me to tears. I am an empath and after watching this video I also realized that I am a narcissist. I realized more than a year ago, that my thoughts, words and actions were not a way I wanted the soul to be reflected. I didn't know what term to call it: I just knew I no longer wanted to be associated with demeaning words or actions. I find myself trying to give energy back to my partner of 20 years, because I realize how draining I truly am. The energy that goes into this facade is so draining to myself, physically, that I frequently fall out into a long nap just to clear my mind of the "trash". I cannot express how eye opening this really is to me. Thank you.
Thank you so much for commenting on the rampant dehumanisation of narcissists. Hurt people hurt people, and focusing energy on blaming and dehumanises only serves as a barrier to healing.
I love that you gave a healing for narrssaists. I have healed myself and now my husband doesn't fit anymore but I wish he did. I couldn't get him to lovingly recieve this message though.
I had lots of struggle with narcissistic people, my mom is narcissist and I attracted two narcissist husband then finally things start changing after my spiritual awaking, now I don’t even feel drain in presence of narcissist, thanks for sharing 🙏🙏🙏
How do I protecting my heart from theese people. I get pain in my heart beeing near theese people. I hate this! And I cannot avoid them either because they are everywhere around me and my prescious daughter.
Oh my gosh!!! I love the fact that you are able to figure this stuff out when there have been so many professionals who are lost. I was a puzzle piece for several narcissists, and it always made me so sad that they could never heal. What you just presented is mind blowing and the fact that it is relatively simple is even more mind blowing. I can’t begin to tell you how impressive you are and this is definitely a game changer and life changer! So much gratitude being sent your way!
Absolutely wonderful. I’m so pleased you’ve done this video, Christina. I’d say I’m highly Empathic, and I’ve always intuitively felt narcissism needs to be treated differently in this world. In my eyes, every human has the ability to heal (whether learning to stand in our power, or learning to graciously allow others full access to their own.) I’ve seen the absolute beauty and strength of several narcissists shine through: all I’ve had to do is stand in my power, and show them I’ll not abandon them through their own healing. They see that truth in my eyes, and something about this seems to transform them in the most beautiful of ways. My wish is for more empaths to heal completely and find the strength to be sovereign, whilst also holding space for other souls to heal. I’m still trying to heal, in many ways, myself. But I’m getting there, and this video has given me much hope. Thank you, lovely Christina. xx 🌸
Omg Christina! You have no idea how much I needed this. This literally came right on time, I've been in a hermit phase for a few days suffering with the abuse of narcissism. Im so glad I found you on my journey. thank you so much!!!
I've watched this video multiple times I was with my narcissist for 12 years divorced in November 2021 his gift to me was my ascension journey and the understanding of my wounds, your videos have helped me heal thank you
Also, thank you for this perspective. Other videos and research make narcissist out to be "the walking dead" with no chance of healing. Which kind of makes it harder for the sensitive to want to leave because we feel that sense of "wanting to save them". This video gave direction and hope. Thank you!
I spent 8 years with an alcoholic narc. At the time I had no idea what was going on. Thought he was just a jerk and all he had to do was change. I also didn't know about my wounds either. Doing the work on yourself is a game changer. Thank you Christine.. This is really going to help me help others with the future work I want to do. Namaste!
You can’t “love” a narc out his/her narcissism. They have to do the work themselves. The key to helping them is this: Once you know you go, implement a no contact regime and do not breach it Bc they will try to contact you.
Oh I'm so glad you did this video, Goddess. So many people speak on narcissism but not fully accurately explain what that is and how it can be healed. Thank you so much, Blessings & Light.
I'm glad you added that side note in the beginning. I've also sensed a lot of dehumanizing in regards to narcissism, also in people pathologizing others with that label, many times unfairly.
Wow, we have heard a lot about narcissism, but seeing it from a spiritual perspective is something else!🌾☀️ Thank you for this wonderful explanation 💓💓💓
Dehumanization is done BY THE NARCISSIST and not by "anyone around them", i.e., the victims. There a two steps to dehumanization. I was told by people who were narcissistic. The first step is hurting others, including animals until they feel nothing, i.e., indifference. The second step is hurting others until they get pleasure from the other person's or animal's pain and suffering. With these two steps complete they can get what they call "the quintessential", which is narcissistic supply. What dehumanizing is about is deadening the conscience so that the person become inhumane. No victim pointing the finger and calling them some name is dehumanizing when the deed is already done to the nth degree by the narcissist themselves. And the same goes for psychopaths and sociopaths. They are all inhumane. Blaming the victim won't help them heal. Giving moral support and empathy is what will help them heal.
Why I love your videos: 1) full explanation of topic and it's meanings in both spiritual and medical perspectives. 2) occasional "side notes" that are also very helpful 3) not only do we get a "what is it truly?" But we also get "how to heal it" and more 🤍 who/what? Where /why? And finally how? Then we can take with us the teachings and implement them into our lives and genuinely enjoy our spiritual journey and self. Thank you C-Lopes! 🙏🙌💯🌻🌿
I look back and see my narcissist side when I was younger... now I am on a higher path, trying to be a better person, trying to correct the anger, the sadness and the fear and learning to self heal instead of reacting at people when it's not them, its a problem within ME... in the last 10 years, I have become better day by day and have ended up with several other hurting individuals who display narcissist behaviors in my life... during our time together, I did my best to try to help them recognize and self heal, but when our time came to an empass, they began to resent me so I cut ties and wished them well...
I agree with you. I do think they can be cured. The only time when they can’t be is when they don’t want too. The crazy thing is that I never wanted to fix him I always told him that was up to him to fix himself he hast to do the footwork I will be there to support him. And here I was supporting someone who didn’t have any desire to change and I was doing everything I could to improve and work on myself. I was taking responsibility for my role and he took none. They can be cured but only if they’re willing to take responsibility and accountability for their actions . Coming to the realization that they don’t want to live in pain inflicting it on others would be amazing. When I started to focus on myself and try to grow he lied about doing any work at all. I started to develop self love & self-worth that I thought I had lost. His reaction to this frightening & ruthless . I still have so much work to do & can’t wait to use the workbook. Thank you
I was a magnet for a series of Narcissists & really needy destructive Borderline women friends. Taking responsibility & healing & now they don't sniff me out & if they do & quietly withdraw. I don't get sucked in anymore.
This is amazing. As a now empowered sensitive, I have my share of narcissists in my life, and have always believed anyone is loveable and can be healed and change. This video has such important stuff! Help everyone believe in themselves, that's always the start to healing. Thank you Christina!
Husband #1...Overt Narcissist; Husband #2...Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist. Six years of darkness...and I am now aware that I am a Sensitive healing. This is precisely why I am healing my inner self. Thank you, thank you, thank you!! And I have been studying the psychological aspect behind a Narcissist. Absolutely love and agree with this spiritual explanation!! Love you all for this!!!
Change of focus on healing oneself - this is missing in most talks. Very good point. Self love instead of blaming others. Sometimes it is just hard to get it right or get away. If there are good reasons to stay - its good to see the these people as training partners. Still, in heavy situations leaving may be necessary.
That would be a good topic for a video: How to distinguish healthy growth relationships from toxic ones. Of course there is a lesson in everything but still.
As a borderline personality I m like a crossover of a narcissist and a codepent, switching both of their traits. The third chakra fact is amazing cause I have this chronic sensation on my stomach and never didn't know what it is. This could literally change my prospective. Thank you so much, you are precious.
Wow! Needed this yesterday! Tried so hard not to get into an argument with my hubby yesterday. But I'm understanding he has a overactive solar Plexus. It's obvious. I'm also healing from co-dependency🙏🏽🌹Thank you for this 🙏🏽
Amazing about energy siphon . Also we focus on the narcissistic person rather than healing of victim I m with narc mother for last 55 years I always focus on her narc personality rather than my healing Thankyou shall heal me now
I was in a marriage with a narc for 18 years. We fed off of each other for most of that time, until I changed. I forgave someone. This one event changed my whole life and awoke me from my slumber. It changed me so much, that my own husband didn't know who I was anymore. It seemed like we both didn't know how to co-exist with each other. We kept trying to communicate, but nothing was getting across. It was weird and frustrating at the same time. But looking back at it, I realize that it was exactly what needed to happen, in order for me to walk away from the marriage. It has been 10 years since that event, and I have learned so much about narcissism and codependency and how I contributed to the whole equation. When I started to pray for him, I started to see him as a human, instead of my enemy. God has helped me to heal, and I am learning how to heal myself by balancing my own chakras. This is a new experience, but it is bringing me into my power! Christina has been a huge help in all of this! Thank you so much for the wonderful work you do!
I love this video. I am definitely a sensitive and a narcissist. I have awoken to this truth within the last 7-8 months. I appreciate your compassion for narcissists and their wounds and pain and your belief that we CAN change! I spent a lot of time working on my heart chakra, which has helped me tune into others more as well as my true feelings and emotions. I had never heard that about the 3rd chakra and it's role in our imbalance. That gives me so much hope and inspiration. I am excited to get to work on my 3rd chakra now!
Aloha Christina, Mahalo for the video! I experienced what you discussed and left the relationship in 2018. I am currently working on myself and recalling my power. I realized the narcissist and codependent relationship and I am accountable for my role in it. The story is way too long for the comments section. Thank you so much!
There is a lot of talking/explaining about when you meet a narcissist througout your life. But I never had a choice, because my father and sister are narcissists. And eventually I had a choice. I moved out and last December I broke contact with them. Well maybe it triggered something within them. But I know I never want contact again. I just hope for my mother and other sister (also broke contact with them) that they will awaken. My mother and sister have hurt me very bad by not taking me seriously and for not bounding with me. But I wish for them to be happy and to heal, especially my mom
It’s like someone who wants to be saved will attract someone who needs to save others and also wants to be saved.. Codependent aka disempowered sensitive .
Thank you for recognizing that narcissist are humans too and have deep wounds. I appreciate you recognizing that they can work towards healing when they are ready to take those steps in this life or another, but they have to want to do the work where healing begins. When you have narcissists in your life, you need to recognize the work begins with you. Stay centered, stay in a loving space within yourself and walk your journey home. ❤
This is all so true. My husband is a narcissist but still a human being, not a "monster". When I think about what his life must have been like as a child I feel so sad. His dad was meaner than a rattlesnake and his mom ignored it all and lived in a fool's paradise. Even though I know there is an expiration date on our relationship, I still want him to heal and go on to have a good life.
I am an empath who have very often put others' needs before my own. I have dated/dealed with narcissists several times. But at some point, I had a mental breakdown and then started to act like a narcissist myself. I still had a guilty conscience so I managed to come back from the dark side I believe. I agree with that thinking narcissists are monsters not humans is wrong. They are very hurt beyond most of us' imagination. They seem confident outside but are feeling miserable and insecure inside.
I guess narcissists need sensitive people in their life to get their own life done but the can´t show respect and prefer to be an abuser to the ones they need the most. They need you more then you will ever need them, but they manipulate your feelings to make you believe that you are the needy one, not them.
understanding that narcs and empaths are human behavioural patterns and not identities goes a long way to understanding the lack of choice both of these groups experience. if you are not aware that the choice exists to modify your own behavior then it will not be made. your mind will create justification for any and all of your troublesome behavior. "they did that so I'm doing this" is one that I've experienced.
@@emknapss Why do you prefer to think that being a narcissist isn´t a choice? I guess you forget that narcissists prefer it to live a lie just because the isolated view is cheaper than to realize that the world is more than the eyes see.
@@emknapss Being empath means mean in interaction with reality but I guess you prefer to deny that fact so you can feel sorry for assholes and live the lie that narcissist be who they are without free will.
@@emknapss It´s choice to think that seeing a detail and prefer to believe that the whole story is a choice, but I guess you have no clue what reality is so you try to match things to make others believe that the view of narcissists isn´t bullshit and interpretation.
How beautiful it is to hear someone say what I feel. Im usually told "I'm too soft" when I say this to people. I have watched many narsasists heal and change. Through love, patients, kindness and gentle honesty. It's a beautiful thing to watch. Thankyou for doing this video, at a time when the world is so negative towards narsasists. ❤ p.s: hearing you say we resonate with narcs, didnt trigger me.... yay for being healed! 🥰 x
It was refreshing to hear that narcisism can be heal ( If they first recognize it in them and commit to healing, as everybody else ) but I feel it is important to say that this message can easily be converted into toxic hope...I believe them being able to heal is NOT a good reason to stay on a toxic relationship. No contact to any toxic substance or relationship is crucial to start the healing process with in you. When I first started learning about this it was harsh to read and hear people saying that they lack so much empathy that they become non-human, it was harsh but it also made sense in a way and it was the thing that finally helped me let go of my need to "help" them or " save" them. I now understand it´s not up to me and that I have my own healing to do. I did observed that the pain of seeing their true self and assuming the responsibility for the harm they´ve done is so intense that they disconnect from being human, at least that´s what I experienced with my dad and ex-husband. I´m interested to see what this new energy and planetarian frequency brings to them also. Thanks Christina!
That's a catch-22. You have to be self-aware to expand in any way. The narcissist is incapable of self-awareness, much less empathy. The person who wrote that doesn't have NPD, they said they "change into this person who hurts others & wants to stop" 1) no self-awareness to change, too painful to face 2) has empathy for others. The limbic system which stores empathy doesn't light up on brain scans...no activity. 3) Cluster B individual's don't "change" ...from empathy to no empathy, that would denote a mood disorder, etc. Unless Divine Intervention on someone with NPD TENDENCIES is being referred to, no they cannot heal, do not expect them to. However they are at their worst, that's who they REALLY are, too many sensitives never understand this. I'm a psychologist & energy healer ( NPD don't seek help in either place, that would imply they aren't perfect & feels like the annihilation of their ego). I understand they hurt, I personally feel they are paying off major karmic debt. Others hurt tremendously, sometimes to the point of suicide, due to narc parents/weak boundaries/youth/no coping skills leading to severe depression. I think the focus should remain on the victim's healing, there are people with traumatic childhood's who ARE sensitives & DON'T hurt their children (generational trauma) & they STOP the cycle. If my dog cries when he's sad missing someone...doesn't that make him more "human" than someone who can't attach in a way that allows empathy? Isn't empathy what makes us human? Dolphins & elephants have more empathy than narcissists, doesn't that make them more evolved? Something that sucks energy out of babies & kids, who aren't even developed yet, is better? What about killing your pregnant wife & 2 babies? Is that more evolved than being an elephant? That's what REAL narcs do. I'd love any opinions on this. * I do forgive narcs in my life I would love to heal them!! ALL!! I'm not looking for someone to blame, I'm highly spiritual, but I don't feel we all possess the same level of humanity like others do. Every person is not the same. Light/Dark, Good/Bad balance, Hermetic principles, etc. Good/Bad is only perception. I can even send some love But the pain is real on both sides, narc & victim. With babies, there's a imbalance of power in the exploitation/negligence no one talks about. We have to guess if they are paying off a karmic debt, if it's free will balancing the Universe, what? That will eventually be revealed for sure. much love all♥️♥️🌎🌎♾♾
I had an awakening just before I met an narcissist, the awakening I had was waking up from my thoughts knowing thoughts are not reality, being more aware , I done it through years of meditation, you also have to have an awakening in personal growth, healing childhood trauma, knowing the narcissist gave me that, he understood the awakening out of thought but 3years later he never got the awakening in personal growth. Childlike he was , you cant teach a child something that it simply doesn't understand and he just used the spiritual insight I gave him to lure in other women.
Growing up with narcissistic parents one covert self righteous and the other malignant I also noticed that the solar plexus chakra can be blocked. My covert narcissist parent always had a blocked solar plexus chakra which showed in stomach issues and other illnesses because they hold the resentment from others in that space while my malignant narcissist parent had an open solar plexus chakra. Both never healed and remained the same fighting with each other in divorce and beyond because they are from the generation that does not believe in therapy or healing because they feel “above it”. As a younger millennial, the best remedy for me was distancing myself which is not dehumanising but protection and most of my inner healing took place in that way. Luckily for me I attracted both genuine loving healthy people in life and narcissists who I would never allow into my life…so besides the bullying I went through at home and at school I always knew that something was not right before I even knew what narcissism was and I am grateful I was made the black sheep in the family because it made me realise what kind of star seed I am in life so I never hold any resentment. Kriya/kundalini yoga is amazing for chakra balance and healing the body.
I've been digging myself out of a mindset I was raised in thanks to channels like yourself. Its hard when the narcissit is your sister and mother and ur a sensitive in a house with people who make u question your reality and sanity. Mind games and had to put up emotional blocks im only now realizing. But videos like these really help me to come into my own power,perspectives and emotions thank you for all your work and energy you put out.
@@evadebruijn I guess I would say I found a partner who helped me grow with trust and self worth. I started to see how his family behaved . And how much more mentally healthy and self confident they were. And then I got lucky with a great boss who mentored me showing me what personal strength looks like. And I guess as a sensitive person I found inner strength to keep moving forward and trying to learn . I unfortunately still struggle with alcohol . But its a work in progress. Trying to find some community and hobbies is my next important step. Get out of my head a little ,you know. If u have any helpful tips im all ears too .:)
@@foxyfoxy4e1 I am very happy to read so many people crossed your path that were so supportive of you healing! I hope you can overcome the alcohol, for it is poison for your brain and IMO for the spirit and soul as well. But I get that it is very hard! I am very much a work in progress myself, what helps me is a long list, quitting psych meds, rounds of microdosing magic mushrooms, plantbased diet, several food supplements, daily walks, lots of rest, facebook support groups (most I don"t like that much but there is one that fits me best and I try to take out of it what helps me and leave the rest) Teal Swan video's, reading books and articles for guiding the psychoanalyses on myself in the right direction, massage therapy, chakra therapy, listening to my own inner voice instead of accepting authority of the mental health system, telling my story. I don't need pity I need witnesses.
@@evadebruijn I relate alot. I like your interests and hobbies. And I agree im feeling the alcohol dimming my light and its a battle because I'm so craving soul progression. Ill have to check out that name u dropped. The other thing that has helped me is gardening and natural medicine. I work at a flower shop and its given my a nice outlet for creativity and and an opportunity for introvert like me to talk to people on a 1 on 1 basis. How do u deal with the narcissist in your family currently. Mine is still a struggle. Altho im on my own nice I still feel boundaries aren't enough to protect myself .do u have that problem?
@@foxyfoxy4e1 I went no contact. Gardening and working in a flowershop sounds lovely! Can't help but think of the mother in the HBO tv series Six Feet Under :)
Thank you for your explanation Christina. I have a narcissistic sister and I have been on the receiving end of her horrible behaviour and bullying for majority of my life. I really struggled with maintaining a relationship with her and persisted because - to put simply “she is my sister, and sisters are meant to be friends”. It’s not just with me, she doesn’t have a relationship with my father, barely one with my mother. I have learned and accepted it’s the way she is and I’ve learned to cut the cord when I was awakening, as much as it did hurt me to do so. I’d find it hard as friends and family would ask how she is and I worried about how the severed relationship reflected on me (as if I had my way, I would most certainly want a relationship with her). I learned to no longer care and just be polite with short answers rather than going into details that are far to complex for such a passing question haha. I’m lucky to have the support of my husband (i’ve been with him since the tender age of 16, im now 34), mother, father who have all witnessed the dysfunction and validate it for me.
11 views, 1 minute ago with 11 likes 😁 Nice synchronicity. Thank you so very much Christina! I totally agree 👍, dehumanizing others isn't necessary. When we point a finger at others we have three pointing back at us 😉. ✌❤😁, good health and prosperity to you and all your viewers.
I've had relationships with every type of narcissist. No more for me. I've finally woke up. I don't hate my narcissistic partners, I've learned many valuable lessons and this video is amazing because we've been taught that narcissists cannot heal. Thank you for all the amazing work you do 🥰
I wish I had the appropriate words to express how much this video means to my spouse and I. So many synchronicities...there is no doubt in my heart that this was a message directly from my guides. You have just saved us and our children a lot of pain and struggle. From the bottom of my heart, thank you ✌🏻❤🎵
Christina, bless you and your work. I'm a very youthful senior who thought she had truly met her soulmate. After two years of tears and trying to heal him, I ended up in hospital with a stroke (nearly, but Drs kept me from having one). Still recovering. I stumbled on your video and now I know what I've been dealing with. And what I thought was a deep soul tie was just the dynamic you spoke of. I still see his inner beauty, his talent,etc, but now I need to heal myself and wish him well. Thanks so much, Christina, for really reaching me something I wished I'd learned long ago. I've suffered so much trying to heal others and giving myself away, piece by piece.
Everything you just said is true!!! I know from experience! Constantly criticizing a narcissist WILL only guarantee they will remain a narcissist. I'm the empath, my husband of 32 years on March 25th, is the narcissist. You can be mean, nice, doesn't matter. It's really spiritual! The one thing I've ignored out of being skeptical. I never knew about chakras till recently. Animals can see these auras. Yet mainstream psychology refuses anything esoteric. Thank you Christina! This is golden information!🕊😎❤
Love love love this Christina 💙 I don't know much about Narcissists, but people around me always talk bad about them, like they aren't human and that you need to be careful and avoid them. In my heart I know that this is wrong, everyone can heal. God loves everyone. After watching this, I think my dad is a narcissist. Cant block him, but I can plant the seed of awareness. Spoke to him the other day about how he verbally abuses my mom, he defended himself of course, but I gently just asked him to try and be nice... just planting the seed. Thanks again for this video. 🙏
Even a narcissist is codependent, both a wounded empath and a narcissist need healing, they attract each other as polar opposites at the end of the same spectrum in order to reflect each other and heal. Also, I don’t believe narcissists want to heal, that’s the dark side of it. I’ve never come across a narcissist who had the cognitive ability to rationalize and to see where a problem is let alone see themselves as wrong and want to heal....
I don't think it is in their ratio where the key to awareness is. The pain of falsehood and inauthenticity has to hurt their soul more than they fear the shame of admitting defeat that playing the winning game is a giant delusion.
And after listening to this video and its great news about narcissists healing possibilities, emphats start quickly ponder how to help the narcisst(s) in their life heal! 😆 This video can damage many enphats lives when they now start forgiving the 100th time when their narcissts once again lie, abandon, disgard, minimize and in all possible way put them down. Oh, but if I am patient, this petson can heal! Maybe. But, let it in to narcisst hands and focus on healing yourself. More realistic information about narcissist you can get for example from Dr. Ramani. When people have struggled YEARS to heal from narcissist abuse, and recovery can last all their life, they might have lost ALL their assets as well - well, think again before starting to heal your narcist. He/she must do it herself. Besides, narcism is more than Christina here explains. You do not have to point anyone and you can feel compassion, because it is true that narcissists are wunded. However, no change happens if you enable narcissistic actions reasoning it. I think that this video can be damaging for many emphaths who are struggling. Now, suddenly, the narcissist became that “poor victim” that nobody understands. Not good.
Perfect timing ❤ I've been healing my blocks and got some downloads today and just realized how co-dependent I am. I started to call back my power last weekend and the relationship started crumbling. I was kind of lost trying to understand what was happening, you just helped me realize so many things. Thank you, your videos have been helping me to have a smoother spiritual journey 💜
Christina - you REALLY nailed this one!! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 Im an empath, hsp, was very codependent until I had my spiritual awakening last May and started working with your videos and signed up for a retreat. I was in a relationship with a wonderful human being, who also happens to be a covert narcissist. We were such a perfect match, that I confused us for twin flames. Now im picking up the pieces of what used to be me, and my life. But Im happy. *Nothing and no one* will ever change the way I feel, that this person is a lovely, wonderful, talented human being, who also happens to be deeply wounded. I will alway cherish this person and the relationship.
Learning to take our power back is challenging at first...its also uncomfortable. But when the work is done, it feels euphoric. I keep affirming everyday that I am in power and I am the master of my life - my solar plexus chakra is healing. The ME, ME, ME people have just dropped away from my life. I have finally changed the puzzle. Thank you, Christina for a beautifully explained video
This was incredibly helpful. I have been trying to change (heal) my narcissism, which I did not recognize for many years. The solar plexis chakra block you described is identical to the feeling of a "rotten black pit" which I felt inside myself. I feel I am on a good path to healing, and this video was very helpful in confirming that and giving me the information and tools I need to heal myself and the people in my life. Thank you Christina.
I do think people are overusing the term these days, especially women. I think it helps them feel better about their failed relationships (vs looking within, since they are the common denominator). Not every guy is a narcissist!
I thought I was gaslighting myself by overthinking narcissism, why? My mother is one! Right on top of me, the relationship much put upon, for the first time ever, I feel I can dissolve the pain
Excellent video again!! I love the way Christina explains and decomposes complex issues and dynamics from an energy perspective and provides ways to heal - First time that I see a video on how both a Narcissist and a Codependent can heal. No one else has done this with so much balance and in with a human focus. Thank you!
I have only been with narcissistic types in friendships and romance and was married to the most extreme one throughout my 20’s. I’ve been healing myself using this program called NARP and it’s all about our inner beings and clearing out blocked traumas so we can thrive. I’m able to put up boundaries with people now without anxiety. My fear has been turning to love and light. It’s incredible. Christina’s perspective is a different take than the quanta healing I’m doing and I love it as well. I am now thankful for the narcs in my past, without them, I wouldn’t have been able to get to where I am today and find myself. Those experiences are a part of my gratitude lists often. Christina’s view helps me see them as human which I’ve been struggling with in my journey to be whole. Thank you for these videos, I am so close to becoming a completely empowered empath. You are an inspiration❤️
I have never written a comment on RUclips before but this video is amazing. Sadly my mother is a narcissist and she drains all the energy from her children ( including me). Every day I pray and meditate that my beloved mother will have a spiritual awakening. That she will heal her past trauma. Thank you for helping me understand the why and the how. Thank you for teaching the lesson about not pointing the finger. I will carry this with me always. Thank you for helping me heal.
Christina, I cannot be more grateful tpnhave found you. You have helped me heal so much of myself and helped save my marriage. Im still in my healing process but there is not a time that I go through something and the videos you make (like this one) help me understand what I'm going through. I've always felt so lost so I really thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤🙏🏻
Have just watched this again and passed it on to a loved one, whom I know it will help as much as it's helping me. THANK YOU, Christina Lopes,!! For your profound wisdom and wonderfully generous spirit!!! Love from the bottom of the heart of a "dis-empowered sensitive", who is finally learning to reclaim her power and find compassion and forgiveness for the narcissists still in my life and one from past. :)
I feel as you told me. Because my name is Soul. :) Actually My parents are narcissists... for 40 years I was controlled and exploited. Now I escaped to Canada from Korea. Immigration is the only way out from them because marriage can’t help me. I need deep mental treatment. If your contents have Korean subtitles, it will help a lot. There is many Narcissist parents in Korea.
I have always has narcissists around me, my mother, partner work colleagues and extended family, just realised I am co- dependant, thank-you so much for your generosity in sharing your videos to help us heal
![What's CODEPENDENCY And How To Heal It Quickly! [4 Steps]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/1zIUEo965l8/mqdefault.jpg)
![What's CODEPENDENCY And How To Heal It Quickly! [4 Steps]](/img/tr.png)
![How To Deal With TOXIC PEOPLE In A Spiritual Way! [3 Powerful Steps]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/OlXkFoGxY2Q/mqdefault.jpg)
💥 NEXT UP: What’s CODEPENDENCY And How To Heal It Quickly! [4 Steps]: ruclips.net/video/1zIUEo965l8/видео.html
Thank you.. for all you do! My hearts so torn from years and years of Draculas! I'm feeling so broke, lost and empty! Wondering why, what and where am I going with my life!
Thank you so much! Your spiritual perspective really helps
Thank you Lisa. This is very necessary esp no dehumanising aspect out there. My dad had a narcissistic personality ..buy I feel for him. He's passed now. But I'm now dealing with the fall out within me..to be honest my whole family dynamic went wonky as a result of my dad and my mum to a lesser degree. Be interesting to know more about children of narcissistic parents etc. Btw where is the handbook?
Thanks for helping me help myself.
Thank you so much for the video! Loved it. Just noticed that you mentioned not only solar plexus as dysunctional to narcissists but also throat chakra. Could you explain that as well? Appreciate a lot.
“The worst lies were the lies I told myself about the lies others told me.” 💫🙏🏾
Amazingly succinct. That's the exact, hollow, regretful feeling.
I feel the hell out of this!
KING HIX, wow......... that is very thought provoking 💜
Thank you. That is me in a nutshell. Blessings to you 🙏
Yep I have pondered this!
I've been with a narcissist for 20 years now. Hard for me to even say that. I only woke up 2 years ago and have been taking my power back and healing my inner child. It's so very hard for me as a sensitive and a Taurus to own my part in this, but I think I have done that now. Change is hard for me still and in my 53 years on this planet, I have never been on my own. I've been doing a lot of solar plexus work as well and I am finally becoming an empowered, sovereign human. Like my son tells me, "Mom, you are one of the strongest people I know. It is time for you to rise." ❤️ And that's exactly what I plan on doing. Thanks in large part to your amazing work here on RUclips Christina, I am getting stronger by the day. I can't thank you enough. There aren't even words. Much love to you always. ❤️ 🙏
🤗
@@ChristinaLopes Christina, don’t even know how you have time to reply to half the comments you do. Thank you making time for those of us that view you as a spiritual mentor. I’m blessed to have found you. 🙏
Amen to that. I’m also a sensitive and a Taurus so I totally understand what you are saying. Sending you a virtual hug for taking your power back and healing.
It’s hard waking up at our age. You hang in there, friend. We got this❤️
@@tangledroots9078 Thanks for the support ❤️ I truly need all the positive vibes I can absorb. I'm also having some health issues. Funny how the Universe works...I had surgery in September, broke my elbow in January, and just had surgery again 2 weeks ago. I almost feel like I'm being punished, but I know I'm not. I'm supposed to be learning something. Idk? Grace and patience is my guess. I've always been a sensitive or empath and I have been traveling this road for awhile. But I didn't truly get it until I began meditating. Wow. Wish I had started that years ago, but divine timing is perfect, so who am I to question it. ❤️ Thanks again for your kind words.
Who here has been both a narcissist and a co-dependant once in their lives, and is now realising that both are, most likely, symptoms of very low self-esteem? 😑
I have definitely swung from one to the other, this aspect of myself i find quite difficult to understand, i think its like this empath/HSP>>empowered empath>>narcissist, if an empowered empath get a bit to full of themselves it is easy to become narcissistic, I have visualized the energy flow into my center as an experiment and find that it brings trouble and difficulties. what Christina said about the black hole 3rd chakra is uncannily exact in explaining the visualisation i have experimented with. if in your empowerment from a disempowered empath gains to much momentum you can over shoot and end up narcissistic, you go too far and of course plummeting back into you previously disempowered state may occur. I think once this is understood a more slow gentle approach to empowering your inner empath is ideal, so that you dont overshoot into narcissism. does this make sense to you ???
I have been all three but thanks to my spiritual awakening my work now is n my Chakras.
I'm so relieved I'm not the only one feeling this way!
My best friend ( I thought she was) for four years has been hurting me and treated me like shit, it toke me so long to realize what is happening, hardest for me to cut her off, but have to
I was wondering that exact thing after watching this video, thinking I'm not sure if I should decrease the size of my solar plexus or take my power back, or both.
I appreciate you mentioning the dehumanizing of narcissist. My mother is one and I find it difficult to reconcile her toxic behavior and her as a person that requires grace. No one is 100% perfect or 100% flawed and it's important to keep that in mind.
Absolutely!!
Yes! It does tear you apart even more!
My father was a narcissist, and for some time I thought that I was the same...now that I have had my awakening, I can truly forgive him
Agreed.
This is SO key to name the humanity of anyone who presents on the spectrum of narcissism. I was hesitant to watch any vids about the subject because of that…and now I feel I am so much more understanding already and open to the healing capacity from exploring my trauma…as otherizing someone who I have suffered around is simply doing that to myself! As well as them. So key, and so healing to have this as the first point in vid. Thanks Cristina!!
Empath and the Narcissist
An all so common relationship dynamic
Starts as a whirlwind, ends up in panic
The empath truly has love and compassion
The narcissist requires constant validation
The narcissist feels truly empty inside
Afraid to be alone in their darkened mind
Afraid of the voices in their head
Believing they're worthless, better off dead
The empath has nothing to gain
They build you up to shut off your pain
What the empath doesn't realize
Is the narcissist's inability to empathize
The narcissist thinks it's a power struggle
The empath has all their feelings to juggle
Pushing and pulling, a constant fight
Waiting for the next rage to ignite
Idealize, devalue, and discard
The narcissistic calling card
The empath is tired of insulting their soul
They awaken and take back their control
Narcissist moves on to another fixation
Unable to live without validation
Never to blame, ego increases
While the empath is left to pick up the pieces
Wow
💌
Beautiful, thank you!
The Narcissist's confession
My biggest fear has come true
I have been found out
My ways of spreading fear with rage
Failed to keep victims in doubt
Could no longer keep up the facade
Gaslighting them to relax
All the lies have come back to haunt
With proof and relevant facts
Kept hiding the damaged child underneath
Afraid to show the shame
Needed validation from everyone
They were all to blame
Took no accountability in my actions
Even though I was at fault
I thought I was acting grown up
Without the emotional maturity of an adult
A constant need for money and power
I must have it all!
Without it I feel worthless
Probably my biggest downfall
The voices inside are too much to bear
They tell me I'm not worth anything
Ego mask has been torn away
Will someone else please worship me?
wow that's well written!
@@mariepichler2758 TY
I am a trauma therapist and healer, I work with those who have cause trauma impacts through harmful behaviors as well as those who have been harmfully impacted. I have been known as the “narcissist whisper” because I have understood this perspective for many years. Being raised by a narcissist as a strong willed empath will help you understand what’s happening on a deeper level. I very much appreciate this information and your opening statement that it is possible and important to be able to talk about these issues without dehumanizing others! Thank you ✨🙏🏼
When they traumatize others they deserve no mercy. Sorry not sorry
Totally respect that everyone can have their perspective and I am grateful that I have the capacity to work with these individuals who create harm by their actions because otherwise our entire world would be very dark place. People like me will continue to work with them in order to make sure more harm doesn’t happen and that they can contribute to the world in a better (at least not harmful) way. Hopefully you have a space where you do not have to be harmed by them. 💞🙏🏼✨
@@jessicarenner4451 Jessica, I spent so much time healing and ascending myself into the best version of myself when I met a girl that seemed like she would do anything for me. Months later I realized I was spending so much energy healing her that I was losing my focus on my own goals and dreams and she was getting stronger in hers (I met her as someone who didn’t have her life together at that point). I just want to know, on a seller level was that my way of avoiding work on myself and focusing on the healing of another at the cost of myself?
@@bobbyfrank9859 I’m not sure that I can answer that. I feel that if you are asking about it then maybe you have that answer within you. It seems that you have great insight and understanding for yourself. I am glad you are able to continue to do you healing work! I find that for myself no matter how much I heal and understand things within myself I am always learning more and go further and deeper within myself. Things are moving in a forward spiral motion and we get to continue to work with things on many various levels. I do not believe we are ever “done” with something and that it will never show up again. It is simply we continue to recognize and move through it at different energies and frequencies. Hope this helps! 🙏🏼
@@bobbyfrank9859 Imagine getting an answer to your question that would really trigger your anger. In the response you have to that triggering answer you might find you've answered your own question. I hope this helps.
(This worked for me recently, not the knee jerk reaction of course but the thought through response I read back after writing it as a comment and then I saw it.)
I love the way you presented this. Mental and personality disorders are no joke and the way some youtubers treat it is very sad. I was raised by a narcissistic mother and been in a narcissistic relationship. It's hard because they're still people, but you still need to know how to protect yourself. Thanks again Christina may the universe bless you.
@Attie’s Mom Thank you, for your insight.
@Attie’s Mom How are these two labels different in your opinion?
Those narsisists I know they also look sick.... like they are rotning up inside theyre teeths look terrible to.....
Amazing video!! My dad was a narcissist. I spent many years avoiding him. He died of cancer almost 2 years ago and I’m barely starting to heal all that hurt. I meditate and visualize him as a toddler, happy, full of wonder and joy, before life had its way with him. It’s very healing!! Thank you for this extremely insightful video!!
The enemy would have your gift used against you. Your sensitivity is your greatest gift, be aware of who you waste your time with. 💫🙏👁👽💚
This is true. I’ve had it used against me plenty of times to where it almost killed me. Literally.
Thank you Christina for talking about dehumanization. My husband and I struggled with pretty severe codependency, and in my search for healing I found so much “pointing the finger”. Yes, my husband had many narcissistic traits, but I still loved him and I knew that together we could heal this wound. When I switched to releasing the need to “fix” him, to healing myself and stepping into my own power, things really began to expand for us. He followed my lead, and we are so much stronger now than before, and than our families before us. Thank you so much for your help with my journey 🙏🏻
Yes, I’m so glad to read a repaired dynamic. Thanks for sharing this
He followed your lead so there was awareness and willingness to heal on his part. Without these things it feels like a dead end street.
I am very happy for the both of you ❣️❣️
I could be wrong but I believe it’s because he had traits and didn’t have full blown narcissist personality disorder.
You can teach a narcissist to show up on time, but you can’t train them to listen once they get there.
Loving your humor. We all need to lighten up...get it? LIGHTen up?
One thing about NARCISSIST thats very annoying and damaging is that they dont want communication on an normal adult level... For example avoiding answering questions, no empathy... they only care about thier perspective and want to dominate at all levels... So yeah the best is probably no contact, cant even resolve little things with them.
So true.
This sounds a lot like the dehumanizing language that Christina is addressing in this video. When you learn to assert your power, raise your voice, and to not let others drain you, even a severe narcissist cannot harm you. You are stronger than any negative force. ✌️
Cant resolve ANYTHING with a narc period full stop.
@@jasminepolson we can have empathy and compassion for the narc at the same time as having the same for ourselves. I still love my narc as a human and wish him the ability to get better, but I do that at a very far distance.
As a self-described "narc," first: thank you for noticing that we are deeply wounded PEOPLE. Thanks to Christina for raising the general public's awareness.
Narcs need to "win." It ain't right, but it is. Once you understand this, you'll know better how to relate to them. WE CAN'T WIN if people dehumanize us. Those who dehumanize us (using the word "narc," for example) keeps us from seeking help.
I have some aspects of narcissism and also of codependence. Codependents were rewarded for giving away their power. I was rewarded for taking others' power. The WOUND is the same
I feel like I've been waiting for this video my whole life. To learn that narcissists can heal (and are!) almost brings me to tears. I never want to be in a friendship again with my former best friend who abused me, but I still care. Also for a lot of our leaders and people in power positions.
I “broke up” with my best friend after recognizing the abuse I was suffering was causing me to be less. 😶
Same here! And like you, I never want my old N friend near me again but have wanted to find compassion, understanding and forgiveness in my heart for her. And the insights in this video help a lot in that regard. At this point, I worry about her adoptive daughter and want more than anything for my friend to be happy and fulfilled if only so that she does not do serious damage to her little girl.
This is a topic that I've been struggling with and here's why:
I consider myself to be a Narcissist at times, not by the definition that I take away power from others but from a perspective based on the fact that I can feel that I'm special and even better than others. I deeply want to be recognized for my social skills, the way I look, what I can do. I have felt entitled to not have to go by the rules because "I know better".
I also consider myself to be a sensitive, co dependant empath at times. I get value from being needed, from helping, giving out advice, doing things for other people, to a point where I forget about myself in the process of it. (so, actually quite selfish )
In both scenarios my sense of worth is given through external situations. In both scenarios there's a fear of b e i n g that gets disguised from d o i n g. I have a hard time with the idea of not providing value to people in any social setting. I let the things I can do define me. In situations where I don't feel seen or heard, I feel worthless.
So... from what I got from this video, those 2 roles seem to be described as a case of either/or. But to me, these roles are both a reflection of a low self esteem. Both can't accept who they are, both are afraid to show any imperfection. They simply manifest according to the energy they're responding to.
Anyway, just my personal experience.
Does this make sense?
1st step is awareness,I am glad u typed your truth!do what Christina told you.I wish I could give this video to my younger sister but I cut all the ties with her as soon as I got confirmed she was a narcissist,I am neither of them,I don't give my power away to anyone.I loved her so much and I had eyes and brain to see the difference and I couldn't help as narcissists don't change by advice but by their willingness.I had no choice and now I am healed .But I am not going back to her bz that's not a wise thing to do. There's a thing about narcissists,people come to know sooner or later.And people run away.
you disclosing your truth is very admirable!that's the 1st step .And if u feel guilt, empathy at all for others then u don't lie in that category, only u will know ! as per i know they don't accept the truth but Christina said there are narcissists who changed by accepting the truth,and she is beyond wisdomful ,so she couldn't be wrong!
Totally agree. 👍
That's an interesting perspective. I feel like I've played both roles all throughout life. I'm glad you brought it up. You hit the nail on the head that both forms of expression stem from low self-esteem. That seems to be my experience at least. Also, I admire Christina's approach to both sensitives and narcissists. Dehumanizing anybody does absolutely nothing for the individual to heal. I'm glad that you introduced this topic with compassion.
Interesting
you help others for helping others or u help others for urself to show others that you did something for them? Bz u said u are an empath as well! If you help others for helping others you are not a narcissist .My sister is! She helped me beyond one should do ,cleaning home,doing dishes,everything and she always said to me She likes it but she hated to do it ,just to get the validation she was doing it,that's not empathic.
She was a covert narcissist ,which means she had very low self esteem,but she couldn't accept it ,I fought it in her mind,even when people praised her,she felt good for some time and started doubting it.I know too much about narcissists.
once my sis saw a boy crying and she felt such a strong sense of talking to him,to help him,I asked her 'you felt bad for him?' she replied to me 'no.' I got shocked ,then i asked her why did u want to talk to him then?that's not empathic.And she got angry because she couldn't listen to the question that exposed her truth.I was simply asking why did u want to talk to him then? All is low self esteem,she wanted to talk to him to help him not feeling the pain for him for validation. I just hope Christina keeps making more videos on healing narcissism as not only narcissits are wounded ,they are wounding others as well.And the victim gets healed but narcissists don't as no one talks about healing narcissists!
One of the key points to understand here is that everyone needs to heal by their selves. You can talk with a person and give some orientation, but empaths and sensitive people need to remember they can't heal others, is not their job to heal the narcissist. Also a main difference is that narcissists mostly cause damage to others with their actions, and codependent people mostly cause damage to their selves, so the consequences of their unbalances aren't the same.
I don't know that I agree. Codependents also cause damage to others because when they constantly need to "save" others, the can actually end up being enablers of others. Meaning, they can delay the other person's healing. This is most notorious with addicts. If an addict has a codepdent around, they'll likely take longer to heal the addiction bec the codependent is there to constantly save them.
Soooooo true
@@ChristinaLopes yet, the co dependent isnt abusive, doesnt TAKE PLEASURE in others' misery, is not manipulstive, does not gaslight, does not minimize, project, devalue, dehumanize the closest ppl, discard others with NO EMPATHY or consideratin of their feelings;
Co dependents dont love bomb, lie, deliberately manipulate; they dont hv intimacy issues, they are authentic, they hv integrity, they dont "breadcrumb" you, they dont use flying monkeys, word salad and create a fake future in others' minds;
Co dependents dont leave you a broken empty shell of the person you once was, questioning your reality at each moment you breathe; they dont make you want to harm youself physically, they dont use smear campaigns against you when they break up with you;
They dont create a c-ptsd in you, making it impossible for you to leave your house, hv panic/anxiety attacks, they dont use your - or worse - THEIR - children to control you.
And this is just from the top of my head.
But I agree they are deeply wounded souls, and dehumanizing them, with or without their awareness to it, is just doing what they did to you. And YOUR SOUL deserves better than to go that low.
I appreciate myself enough to know this is an amazing person, that I couldnt help - but it wasnt my job to begin with.
@@ChristinaLopes I do agree with you completely regarding my responsibility, my co dependency, my enabling.
I think my narc ex is one of the most and truly amazing ppl ive met thus far.
The most sensible explanation on narcissistic relationships and their nature. Loveeeee it. Must watch.
Yes I agree, a really sensible explanation ....( the third chakra is opened too much so it syphones energy a black hole that sucks everything around it.) Personal power and self image
I lived with one for 9 long years and even after I decided to leave him I didn’t know what narcissism was. I’ve learned about it when I met someone special and I got my spiritual awakening and kundalini . That’s when I went back to that era and I made my math.
Christina I can’t tell you enough how these last two videos have helped us empaths. I broke free from a long marriage to a narcissist and dove head on into self healing now for almost 4 years. I’m feeling great and would like to begin dating however like most of us in the situation I’m a little afraid of not recognizing a narc while dating. A video for empaths entering the dating world would be a great Part 3 🙏 I am so thankful for your work . It truly has been life changing. I love you ❤️
I have never forgotten something my late Mom said to me when I was about 3 years old, and I was pointing my finger at someone and complaining about how " horrible" he was. She demonstrated to me that every time you point your finger at someone, there are three fingers pointing back at you. I am now in my 60s, and it is still a powerful reminder.
True!
Narcissism and co-dependency exist on a spectrum as well, and we can all have them to some degree. Thank you for bringing awareness to the spiritual aspects of the dynamics. The more we know, the more we grow!🌱
Exactly.
This brought me to tears. I am an empath and after watching this video I also realized that I am a narcissist. I realized more than a year ago, that my thoughts, words and actions were not a way I wanted the soul to be reflected. I didn't know what term to call it: I just knew I no longer wanted to be associated with demeaning words or actions. I find myself trying to give energy back to my partner of 20 years, because I realize how draining I truly am. The energy that goes into this facade is so draining to myself, physically, that I frequently fall out into a long nap just to clear my mind of the "trash". I cannot express how eye opening this really is to me. Thank you.
Thank you so much for commenting on the rampant dehumanisation of narcissists. Hurt people hurt people, and focusing energy on blaming and dehumanises only serves as a barrier to healing.
I love that you gave a healing for narrssaists. I have healed myself and now my husband doesn't fit anymore but I wish he did. I couldn't get him to lovingly recieve this message though.
I’m so sorry. Our paths don’t always bring us to where we want to be but where we need to be.
I had lots of struggle with narcissistic people, my mom is narcissist and I attracted two narcissist husband then finally things start changing after my spiritual awaking, now I don’t even feel drain in presence of narcissist, thanks for sharing 🙏🙏🙏
How do I protecting my heart from theese people. I get pain in my heart beeing near theese people. I hate this! And I cannot avoid them either because they are everywhere around me and my prescious daughter.
@@ainahaga keep working on yourself dear. One day you will be ok with them. Good luck 🤞
Oh my gosh!!! I love the fact that you are able to figure this stuff out when there have been so many professionals who are lost. I was a puzzle piece for several narcissists, and it always made me so sad that they could never heal. What you just presented is mind blowing and the fact that it is relatively simple is even more mind blowing. I can’t begin to tell you how impressive you are and this is definitely a game changer and life changer! So much gratitude being sent your way!
Finally a spiritual true perspective getting right down to the root without shaming anyone. Thank you! 💖
Absolutely wonderful. I’m so pleased you’ve done this video, Christina. I’d say I’m highly Empathic, and I’ve always intuitively felt narcissism needs to be treated differently in this world. In my eyes, every human has the ability to heal (whether learning to stand in our power, or learning to graciously allow others full access to their own.)
I’ve seen the absolute beauty and strength of several narcissists shine through: all I’ve had to do is stand in my power, and show them I’ll not abandon them through their own healing. They see that truth in my eyes, and something about this seems to transform them in the most beautiful of ways. My wish is for more empaths to heal completely and find the strength to be sovereign, whilst also holding space for other souls to heal. I’m still trying to heal, in many ways, myself. But I’m getting there, and this video has given me much hope. Thank you, lovely Christina. xx 🌸
Omg Christina! You have no idea how much I needed this. This literally came right on time, I've been in a hermit phase for a few days suffering with the abuse of narcissism. Im so glad I found you on my journey. thank you so much!!!
I've watched this video multiple times I was with my narcissist for 12 years divorced in November 2021 his gift to me was my ascension journey and the understanding of my wounds, your videos have helped me heal thank you
Also, thank you for this perspective. Other videos and research make narcissist out to be "the walking dead" with no chance of healing. Which kind of makes it harder for the sensitive to want to leave because we feel that sense of "wanting to save them". This video gave direction and hope. Thank you!
I spent 8 years with an alcoholic narc. At the time I had no idea what was going on. Thought he was just a jerk and all he had to do was change. I also didn't know about my wounds either. Doing the work on yourself is a game changer.
Thank you Christine.. This is really going to help me help others with the future work I want to do. Namaste!
You can’t “love” a narc out his/her narcissism. They have to do the work themselves. The key to helping them is this: Once you know you go, implement a no contact regime and do not breach it Bc they will try to contact you.
Incredible! All videos I've ever seen on narcissm are just going on and on about how immoral they are. Love hearing about the energetics behind it.
Oh I'm so glad you did this video, Goddess. So many people speak on narcissism but not fully accurately explain what that is and how it can be healed. Thank you so much, Blessings & Light.
Thank you for saying this first. You can see that Christina hears us, you speak for many of us who see the video after over 200 replies. 🙏
I'm glad you added that side note in the beginning. I've also sensed a lot of dehumanizing in regards to narcissism, also in people pathologizing others with that label, many times unfairly.
Wow, we have heard a lot about narcissism, but seeing it from a spiritual perspective is something else!🌾☀️
Thank you for this wonderful explanation 💓💓💓
Dehumanization is done BY THE NARCISSIST and not by "anyone around them", i.e., the victims.
There a two steps to dehumanization. I was told by people who were narcissistic. The first step is hurting others, including animals until they feel nothing, i.e., indifference. The second step is hurting others until they get pleasure from the other person's or animal's pain and suffering. With these two steps complete they can get what they call "the quintessential", which is narcissistic supply.
What dehumanizing is about is deadening the conscience so that the person become inhumane. No victim pointing the finger and calling them some name is dehumanizing when the deed is already done to the nth degree by the narcissist themselves. And the same goes for psychopaths and sociopaths. They are all inhumane.
Blaming the victim won't help them heal. Giving moral support and empathy is what will help them heal.
You know you still need healing when you keep attracting them. Self awareness and self-inquiry is so important
Why I love your videos:
1) full explanation of topic and it's meanings in both spiritual and medical perspectives.
2) occasional "side notes" that are also very helpful
3) not only do we get a "what is it truly?" But we also get "how to heal it" and more 🤍 who/what? Where /why? And finally how? Then we can take with us the teachings and implement them into our lives and genuinely enjoy our spiritual journey and self. Thank you C-Lopes! 🙏🙌💯🌻🌿
I look back and see my narcissist side when I was younger... now I am on a higher path, trying to be a better person, trying to correct the anger, the sadness and the fear and learning to self heal instead of reacting at people when it's not them, its a problem within ME... in the last 10 years, I have become better day by day and have ended up with several other hurting individuals who display narcissist behaviors in my life... during our time together, I did my best to try to help them recognize and self heal, but when our time came to an empass, they began to resent me so I cut ties and wished them well...
I agree with you. I do think they can be cured. The only time when they can’t be is when they don’t want too. The crazy thing is that I never wanted to fix him I always told him that was up to him to fix himself he hast to do the footwork I will be there to support him. And here I was supporting someone who didn’t have any desire to change and I was doing everything I could to improve and work on myself. I was taking responsibility for my role and he took none. They can be cured but only if they’re willing to take responsibility and accountability for their actions . Coming to the realization that they don’t want to live in pain inflicting it on others would be amazing. When I started to focus on myself and try to grow he lied about doing any work at all. I started to develop self love & self-worth that I thought I had lost. His reaction to this frightening & ruthless . I still have so much work to do & can’t wait to use the workbook. Thank you
I was a magnet for a series of Narcissists & really needy destructive Borderline women friends. Taking responsibility & healing & now they don't sniff me out & if they do & quietly withdraw.
I don't get sucked in anymore.
Thank you for starting off with a note about dehumanization. Its toxic and there needs to be room for narcissitic people to heal also. 💕
This is amazing. As a now empowered sensitive, I have my share of narcissists in my life, and have always believed anyone is loveable and can be healed and change. This video has such important stuff! Help everyone believe in themselves, that's always the start to healing. Thank you Christina!
Husband #1...Overt Narcissist; Husband #2...Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist.
Six years of darkness...and I am now aware that I am a Sensitive healing. This is precisely why I am healing my inner self. Thank you, thank you, thank you!! And I have been studying the psychological aspect behind a Narcissist. Absolutely love and agree with this spiritual explanation!! Love you all for this!!!
Change of focus on healing oneself - this is missing in most talks. Very good point. Self love instead of blaming others. Sometimes it is just hard to get it right or get away. If there are good reasons to stay - its good to see the these people as training partners. Still, in heavy situations leaving may be necessary.
That would be a good topic for a video: How to distinguish healthy growth relationships from toxic ones. Of course there is a lesson in everything but still.
As a borderline personality I m like a crossover of a narcissist and a codepent, switching both of their traits. The third chakra fact is amazing cause I have this chronic sensation on my stomach and never didn't know what it is. This could literally change my prospective. Thank you so much, you are precious.
Wow! Needed this yesterday! Tried so hard not to get into an argument with my hubby yesterday. But I'm understanding he has a overactive solar Plexus. It's obvious. I'm also healing from co-dependency🙏🏽🌹Thank you for this 🙏🏽
Beautiful explanation. We are all narcissistic in some way, sometimes being around a narcissist acts like a mirror for our own flaws
Amazing about energy siphon . Also we focus on the narcissistic person rather than healing of victim
I m with narc mother for last 55 years I always focus on her narc personality rather than my healing
Thankyou shall heal me now
THIS MADE ALL THE SENSE IN THE WORLD IM CRYING!!! You’re out here saving lives 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I was in a marriage with a narc for 18 years. We fed off of each other for most of that time, until I changed. I forgave someone. This one event changed my whole life and awoke me from my slumber. It changed me so much, that my own husband didn't know who I was anymore. It seemed like we both didn't know how to co-exist with each other. We kept trying to communicate, but nothing was getting across. It was weird and frustrating at the same time. But looking back at it, I realize that it was exactly what needed to happen, in order for me to walk away from the marriage. It has been 10 years since that event, and I have learned so much about narcissism and codependency and how I contributed to the whole equation. When I started to pray for him, I started to see him as a human, instead of my enemy. God has helped me to heal, and I am learning how to heal myself by balancing my own chakras. This is a new experience, but it is bringing me into my power! Christina has been a huge help in all of this! Thank you so much for the wonderful work you do!
I love this video. I am definitely a sensitive and a narcissist. I have awoken to this truth within the last 7-8 months. I appreciate your compassion for narcissists and their wounds and pain and your belief that we CAN change! I spent a lot of time working on my heart chakra, which has helped me tune into others more as well as my true feelings and emotions. I had never heard that about the 3rd chakra and it's role in our imbalance. That gives me so much hope and inspiration. I am excited to get to work on my 3rd chakra now!
Aloha Christina,
Mahalo for the video! I experienced what you discussed and left the relationship in 2018. I am currently working on myself and recalling my power. I realized the narcissist and codependent relationship and I am accountable for my role in it.
The story is way too long for the comments section.
Thank you so much!
I'm so happy to see you do this video!
There is a lot of talking/explaining about when you meet a narcissist througout your life. But I never had a choice, because my father and sister are narcissists. And eventually I had a choice. I moved out and last December I broke contact with them. Well maybe it triggered something within them. But I know I never want contact again. I just hope for my mother and other sister (also broke contact with them) that they will awaken. My mother and sister have hurt me very bad by not taking me seriously and for not bounding with me. But I wish for them to be happy and to heal, especially my mom
It’s like someone who wants to be saved will attract someone who needs to save others and also wants to be saved.. Codependent aka disempowered sensitive .
@Jojo Moa good for you. When you know better you do better ❤️😉
I lived with a narrsatist it was one of my mom, boyfriends he was controlling this really hits home
It's like a big hole that is never satisfied. I often catch myself suppressing emotions wit food, during dark times.
Thank you for recognizing that narcissist are humans too and have deep wounds. I appreciate you recognizing that they can work towards healing when they are ready to take those steps in this life or another, but they have to want to do the work where healing begins. When you have narcissists in your life, you need to recognize the work begins with you. Stay centered, stay in a loving space within yourself and walk your journey home. ❤
Some people are Narcissist towards you because you don’t resonate with them, in such a case you really need to let them go.
This is all so true. My husband is a narcissist but still a human being, not a "monster". When I think about what his life must have been like as a child I feel so sad. His dad was meaner than a rattlesnake and his mom ignored it all and lived in a fool's paradise. Even though I know there is an expiration date on our relationship, I still want him to heal and go on to have a good life.
I am an empath who have very often put others' needs before my own. I have dated/dealed with narcissists several times. But at some point, I had a mental breakdown and then started to act like a narcissist myself. I still had a guilty conscience so I managed to come back from the dark side I believe. I agree with that thinking narcissists are monsters not humans is wrong. They are very hurt beyond most of us' imagination. They seem confident outside but are feeling miserable and insecure inside.
I guess narcissists need sensitive people in their life to get their own life done but the can´t show respect and prefer to be an abuser to the ones they need the most. They need you more then you will ever need them, but they manipulate your feelings to make you believe that you are the needy one, not them.
understanding that narcs and empaths are human behavioural patterns and not identities goes a long way to understanding the lack of choice both of these groups experience. if you are not aware that the choice exists to modify your own behavior then it will not be made. your mind will create justification for any and all of your troublesome behavior. "they did that so I'm doing this" is one that I've experienced.
@@emknapss Why do you prefer to think that being a narcissist isn´t a choice? I guess you forget that narcissists prefer it to live a lie just because the isolated view is cheaper than to realize that the world is more than the eyes see.
@@emknapss Being empath means mean in interaction with reality but I guess you prefer to deny that fact so you can feel sorry for assholes and live the lie that narcissist be who they are without free will.
@@emknapss It´s choice to think that seeing a detail and prefer to believe that the whole story is a choice, but I guess you have no clue what reality is so you try to match things to make others believe that the view of narcissists isn´t bullshit and interpretation.
@@emknapss Narcissists are stupid enough to think that they know the world even if they only know some elements.
I meditate,even more on the heart. I love when I feel love in my heart and then I meet a narsist and I feel pain in my heart...
How beautiful it is to hear someone say what I feel. Im usually told "I'm too soft" when I say this to people. I have watched many narsasists heal and change. Through love, patients, kindness and gentle honesty. It's a beautiful thing to watch. Thankyou for doing this video, at a time when the world is so negative towards narsasists. ❤ p.s: hearing you say we resonate with narcs, didnt trigger me.... yay for being healed! 🥰 x
It was refreshing to hear that narcisism can be heal ( If they first recognize it in them and commit to healing, as everybody else ) but I feel it is important to say that this message can easily be converted into toxic hope...I believe them being able to heal is NOT a good reason to stay on a toxic relationship. No contact to any toxic substance or relationship is crucial to start the healing process with in you. When I first started learning about this it was harsh to read and hear people saying that they lack so much empathy that they become non-human, it was harsh but it also made sense in a way and it was the thing that finally helped me let go of my need to "help" them or " save" them. I now understand it´s not up to me and that I have my own healing to do. I did observed that the pain of seeing their true self and assuming the responsibility for the harm they´ve done is so intense that they disconnect from being human, at least that´s what I experienced with my dad and ex-husband. I´m interested to see what this new energy and planetarian frequency brings to them also. Thanks Christina!
That's a catch-22. You have to be self-aware to expand in any way.
The narcissist is incapable of self-awareness, much less empathy. The person who wrote that doesn't have NPD, they said they "change into this person who hurts others & wants to stop" 1) no self-awareness to change, too painful to face 2) has empathy for others. The limbic system which stores empathy doesn't light up on brain scans...no activity. 3) Cluster B individual's don't "change" ...from empathy to no empathy, that would denote a mood disorder, etc.
Unless Divine Intervention on someone with NPD TENDENCIES is being referred to, no they cannot heal, do not expect them to.
However they are at their worst, that's who they REALLY are, too many sensitives never understand this.
I'm a psychologist & energy healer ( NPD don't seek help in either place, that would imply they aren't perfect & feels like the annihilation of their ego).
I understand they hurt, I personally feel they are paying off major karmic debt. Others hurt tremendously, sometimes to the point of suicide, due to narc parents/weak boundaries/youth/no coping skills leading to severe depression.
I think the focus should remain on the victim's healing, there are people with traumatic childhood's who ARE sensitives & DON'T hurt their children (generational trauma) & they STOP the cycle.
If my dog cries when he's sad missing someone...doesn't that make him more "human" than someone who can't attach in a way that allows empathy?
Isn't empathy what makes us human?
Dolphins & elephants have more empathy than narcissists, doesn't that make them more evolved?
Something that sucks energy out of babies & kids, who aren't even developed yet, is better?
What about killing your pregnant wife & 2 babies?
Is that more evolved than being an elephant?
That's what REAL narcs do.
I'd love any opinions on this.
* I do forgive narcs in my life I would love to heal them!! ALL!! I'm not looking for someone to blame, I'm highly spiritual, but I don't feel we all possess the same level of humanity like others do. Every person is not the same. Light/Dark, Good/Bad balance, Hermetic principles, etc.
Good/Bad is only perception.
I can even send some love
But the pain is real on both sides, narc & victim. With babies, there's a imbalance of power in the exploitation/negligence no one talks about.
We have to guess if they are paying off a karmic debt, if it's free will balancing the Universe, what? That will eventually be revealed for sure. much love all♥️♥️🌎🌎♾♾
I had an awakening just before I met an narcissist, the awakening I had was waking up from my thoughts knowing thoughts are not reality, being more aware , I done it through years of meditation, you also have to have an awakening in personal growth, healing childhood trauma, knowing the narcissist gave me that, he understood the awakening out of thought but 3years later he never got the awakening in personal growth. Childlike he was , you cant teach a child something that it simply doesn't understand and he just used the spiritual insight I gave him to lure in other women.
Growing up with narcissistic parents one covert self righteous and the other malignant I also noticed that the solar plexus chakra can be blocked. My covert narcissist parent always had a blocked solar plexus chakra which showed in stomach issues and other illnesses because they hold the resentment from others in that space while my malignant narcissist parent had an open solar plexus chakra.
Both never healed and remained the same fighting with each other in divorce and beyond because they are from the generation that does not believe in therapy or healing because they feel “above it”.
As a younger millennial, the best remedy for me was distancing myself which is not dehumanising but protection and most of my inner healing took place in that way.
Luckily for me I attracted both genuine loving healthy people in life and narcissists who I would never allow into my life…so besides the bullying I went through at home and at school I always knew that something was not right before I even knew what narcissism was and I am grateful I was made the black sheep in the family because it made me realise what kind of star seed I am in life so I never hold any resentment.
Kriya/kundalini yoga is amazing for chakra balance and healing the body.
I've been digging myself out of a mindset I was raised in thanks to channels like yourself. Its hard when the narcissit is your sister and mother and ur a sensitive in a house with people who make u question your reality and sanity. Mind games and had to put up emotional blocks im only now realizing. But videos like these really help me to come into my own power,perspectives and emotions thank you for all your work and energy you put out.
What helped you in overcoming trauma from a life of gaslighting? Struggling myself atm.
@@evadebruijn
I guess I would say I found a partner who helped me grow with trust and self worth. I started to see how his family behaved . And how much more mentally healthy and self confident they were. And then I got lucky with a great boss who mentored me showing me what personal strength looks like. And I guess as a sensitive person I found inner strength to keep moving forward and trying to learn . I unfortunately still struggle with alcohol . But its a work in progress. Trying to find some community and hobbies is my next important step. Get out of my head a little ,you know. If u have any helpful tips im all ears too .:)
@@foxyfoxy4e1 I am very happy to read so many people crossed your path that were so supportive of you healing! I hope you can overcome the alcohol, for it is poison for your brain and IMO for the spirit and soul as well. But I get that it is very hard!
I am very much a work in progress myself, what helps me is a long list, quitting psych meds, rounds of microdosing magic mushrooms, plantbased diet, several food supplements, daily walks, lots of rest, facebook support groups (most I don"t like that much but there is one that fits me best and I try to take out of it what helps me and leave the rest) Teal Swan video's, reading books and articles for guiding the psychoanalyses on myself in the right direction, massage therapy, chakra therapy, listening to my own inner voice instead of accepting authority of the mental health system, telling my story. I don't need pity I need witnesses.
@@evadebruijn I relate alot. I like your interests and hobbies. And I agree im feeling the alcohol dimming my light and its a battle because I'm so craving soul progression. Ill have to check out that name u dropped. The other thing that has helped me is gardening and natural medicine. I work at a flower shop and its given my a nice outlet for creativity and and an opportunity for introvert like me to talk to people on a 1 on 1 basis.
How do u deal with the narcissist in your family currently. Mine is still a struggle. Altho im on my own nice I still feel boundaries aren't enough to protect myself .do u have that problem?
@@foxyfoxy4e1 I went no contact.
Gardening and working in a flowershop sounds lovely! Can't help but think of the mother in the HBO tv series Six Feet Under :)
Thank you for your explanation Christina. I have a narcissistic sister and I have been on the receiving end of her horrible behaviour and bullying for majority of my life. I really struggled with maintaining a relationship with her and persisted because - to put simply “she is my sister, and sisters are meant to be friends”.
It’s not just with me, she doesn’t have a relationship with my father, barely one with my mother. I have learned and accepted it’s the way she is and I’ve learned to cut the cord when I was awakening, as much as it did hurt me to do so. I’d find it hard as friends and family would ask how she is and I worried about how the severed relationship reflected on me (as if I had my way, I would most certainly want a relationship with her). I learned to no longer care and just be polite with short answers rather than going into details that are far to complex for such a passing question haha.
I’m lucky to have the support of my husband (i’ve been with him since the tender age of 16, im now 34), mother, father who have all witnessed the dysfunction and validate it for me.
I think this might be the best explanation of the narcissist /narcissist-empath relationship that I've seen! Thank you 🙏🏽
11 views, 1 minute ago with 11 likes 😁 Nice synchronicity. Thank you so very much Christina! I totally agree 👍, dehumanizing others isn't necessary. When we point a finger at others we have three pointing back at us 😉.
✌❤😁, good health and prosperity to you and all your viewers.
I've had relationships with every type of narcissist. No more for me. I've finally woke up. I don't hate my narcissistic partners, I've learned many valuable lessons and this video is amazing because we've been taught that narcissists cannot heal. Thank you for all the amazing work you do 🥰
I wish I had the appropriate words to express how much this video means to my spouse and I. So many synchronicities...there is no doubt in my heart that this was a message directly from my guides. You have just saved us and our children a lot of pain and struggle. From the bottom of my heart, thank you ✌🏻❤🎵
Christina, bless you and your work. I'm a very youthful senior who thought she had truly met her soulmate. After two years of tears and trying to heal him, I ended up in hospital with a stroke (nearly, but Drs kept me from having one). Still recovering. I stumbled on your video and now I know what I've been dealing with. And what I thought was a deep soul tie was just the dynamic you spoke of. I still see his inner beauty, his talent,etc, but now I need to heal myself and wish him well. Thanks so much, Christina, for really reaching me something I wished I'd learned long ago. I've suffered so much trying to heal others and giving myself away, piece by piece.
Everything you just said is true!!!
I know from experience!
Constantly criticizing a narcissist WILL only guarantee they will remain a narcissist.
I'm the empath, my husband of 32 years on March 25th, is the narcissist.
You can be mean, nice, doesn't matter. It's really spiritual! The one thing I've ignored out of being skeptical. I never knew about chakras till recently. Animals can see these auras. Yet mainstream psychology refuses anything esoteric.
Thank you Christina!
This is golden information!🕊😎❤
Love love love this Christina 💙 I don't know much about Narcissists, but people around me always talk bad about them, like they aren't human and that you need to be careful and avoid them. In my heart I know that this is wrong, everyone can heal. God loves everyone. After watching this, I think my dad is a narcissist. Cant block him, but I can plant the seed of awareness. Spoke to him the other day about how he verbally abuses my mom, he defended himself of course, but I gently just asked him to try and be nice... just planting the seed. Thanks again for this video. 🙏
Even a narcissist is codependent, both a wounded empath and a narcissist need healing, they attract each other as polar opposites at the end of the same spectrum in order to reflect each other and heal.
Also, I don’t believe narcissists want to heal, that’s the dark side of it. I’ve never come across a narcissist who had the cognitive ability to rationalize and to see where a problem is let alone see themselves as wrong and want to heal....
I don't think it is in their ratio where the key to awareness is. The pain of falsehood and inauthenticity has to hurt their soul more than they fear the shame of admitting defeat that playing the winning game is a giant delusion.
I was the socket for their plug. The puzzle piece analogy is brilliant.
And after listening to this video and its great news about narcissists healing possibilities, emphats start quickly ponder how to help the narcisst(s) in their life heal! 😆
This video can damage many enphats lives when they now start forgiving the 100th time when their narcissts once again lie, abandon, disgard, minimize and in all possible way put them down. Oh, but if I am patient, this petson can heal!
Maybe. But, let it in to narcisst hands and focus on healing yourself.
More realistic information about narcissist you can get for example from Dr. Ramani. When people have struggled YEARS to heal from narcissist abuse, and recovery can last all their life, they might have lost ALL their assets as well - well, think again before starting to heal your narcist. He/she must do it herself.
Besides, narcism is more than Christina here explains.
You do not have to point anyone and you can feel compassion, because it is true that narcissists are wunded. However, no change happens if you enable narcissistic actions reasoning it.
I think that this video can be damaging for many emphaths who are struggling. Now, suddenly, the narcissist became that “poor victim” that nobody understands.
Not good.
Perfect timing ❤ I've been healing my blocks and got some downloads today and just realized how co-dependent I am. I started to call back my power last weekend and the relationship started crumbling. I was kind of lost trying to understand what was happening, you just helped me realize so many things. Thank you, your videos have been helping me to have a smoother spiritual journey 💜
Thank you for this perspective!! You made points I’ve never heard before!
I have found this to be one of the most helpful expressions on the topic, and stand eternally grateful to you madame 💜
Christina - you REALLY nailed this one!! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Im an empath, hsp, was very codependent until I had my spiritual awakening last May and started working with your videos and signed up for a retreat.
I was in a relationship with a wonderful human being, who also happens to be a covert narcissist.
We were such a perfect match, that I confused us for twin flames. Now im picking up the pieces of what used to be me, and my life.
But Im happy. *Nothing and no one* will ever change the way I feel, that this person is a lovely, wonderful, talented human being, who also happens to be deeply wounded. I will alway cherish this person and the relationship.
Learning to take our power back is challenging at first...its also uncomfortable. But when the work is done, it feels euphoric. I keep affirming everyday that I am in power and I am the master of my life - my solar plexus chakra is healing. The ME, ME, ME people have just dropped away from my life. I have finally changed the puzzle. Thank you, Christina for a beautifully explained video
This was incredibly helpful. I have been trying to change (heal) my narcissism, which I did not recognize for many years. The solar plexis chakra block you described is identical to the feeling of a "rotten black pit" which I felt inside myself. I feel I am on a good path to healing, and this video was very helpful in confirming that and giving me the information and tools I need to heal myself and the people in my life. Thank you Christina.
I feel like you're guiding me to freedom...im beyond words grateful you have entered my life
I do think people are overusing the term these days, especially women. I think it helps them feel better about their failed relationships (vs looking within, since they are the common denominator). Not every guy is a narcissist!
Yeah I resonate with this!
Narcissism is actually on the rise, according to Dr Ramani. Social Media makes it worse
I thought I was gaslighting myself by overthinking narcissism, why? My mother is one! Right on top of me, the relationship much put upon, for the first time ever, I feel I can dissolve the pain
Excellent video again!! I love the way Christina explains and decomposes complex issues and dynamics from an energy perspective and provides ways to heal - First time that I see a video on how both a Narcissist and a Codependent can heal. No one else has done this with so much balance and in with a human focus. Thank you!
I have only been with narcissistic types in friendships and romance and was married to the most extreme one throughout my 20’s. I’ve been healing myself using this program called NARP and it’s all about our inner beings and clearing out blocked traumas so we can thrive. I’m able to put up boundaries with people now without anxiety. My fear has been turning to love and light. It’s incredible.
Christina’s perspective is a different take than the quanta healing I’m doing and I love it as well. I am now thankful for the narcs in my past, without them, I wouldn’t have been able to get to where I am today and find myself. Those experiences are a part of my gratitude lists often. Christina’s view helps me see them as human which I’ve been struggling with in my journey to be whole. Thank you for these videos, I am so close to becoming a completely empowered empath. You are an inspiration❤️
I have never written a comment on RUclips before but this video is amazing. Sadly my mother is a narcissist and she drains all the energy from her children ( including me). Every day I pray and meditate that my beloved mother will have a spiritual awakening. That she will heal her past trauma. Thank you for helping me understand the why and the how. Thank you for teaching the lesson about not pointing the finger. I will carry this with me always. Thank you for helping me heal.
Christina, I cannot be more grateful tpnhave found you. You have helped me heal so much of myself and helped save my marriage. Im still in my healing process but there is not a time that I go through something and the videos you make (like this one) help me understand what I'm going through. I've always felt so lost so I really thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤🙏🏻
Have just watched this again and passed it on to a loved one, whom I know it will help as much as it's helping me. THANK YOU, Christina Lopes,!! For your profound wisdom and wonderfully generous spirit!!! Love from the bottom of the heart of a "dis-empowered sensitive", who is finally learning to reclaim her power and find compassion and forgiveness for the narcissists still in my life and one from past. :)
I feel as you told me. Because my name is Soul. :) Actually My parents are narcissists... for 40 years I was controlled and exploited. Now I escaped to Canada from Korea. Immigration is the only way out from them because marriage can’t help me. I need deep mental treatment. If your contents have Korean subtitles, it will help a lot. There is many Narcissist parents in Korea.
It’s like you read my mind, I have a realisation about something and then shortly after you post a video discussing the topic. 🤯🙏
I have always has narcissists around me, my mother, partner work colleagues and extended family, just realised I am co- dependant, thank-you so much for your generosity in sharing your videos to help us heal
I would have liked this video 10 times if I had been able to!!! I needed to watch this. This was explained sooooooooo well, thank you!!!