There’s a distant relative of mine who’s SISTER got intimate with her husband many years ago when they were in their 20s. They are in their 50s/60s now but their relationship has never been the same. At the end of the day , you can be wise but people who want to cheat will cheat. Also, sometimes you really don’t know the true heart of a person.
Yes! When I meeting my sister at her home and she's not there yet I wait in the car when her hubby is at home.I do this with other family members too. Just seems respectful in my eyes.
Everything you said was SPOT ON. From your own personal boundaries to Kierra. At the end of the day, you can trust, but don't be stupid. Boundaries exist for a reason--to protect yourself from the what ifs.
As a happily married woman of 6 years, to my friend of 17 years, this is a boundary, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. If the two have an understanding it has nothing to do with insecurity. We are very particular on who we allow access to us and our home. Visiting is one thing staying overnight is another. We have close family and friends who have stayed with us, but these are also people who have known us for all our lives, and are loyal to us. Allowing everyone access to your home and marriage is not wise. The lady discussing "real friends" and "not having envious friends", ma'am an envious person is not going to say "I envy you", so we don't know. Which is why it's best to have boundaries. I have great faith in my girlfriends and my husband, especially, however, it would be foolish for me to belive that any and everyone is worthy of this trust. Again, its between those spouses and if they have this agreement then why yall up in arms? Yall wanna come over so bad huh ? lol WHY? Y'all don't have a house?🤣
Well duh an envious friend won’t say they are but you can definitely feel peoples energy. Why be friends with someone if you’re worried they MIGHT be envious of you and why have a spouse you think MIGHT cheat of you when given the chance. You can spin it, turn it, flip it, bop it, whatever you wanna do. I stand by what i said. I wouldn’t necessarily say thinking that way makes someone’s insecure but its definitely questionable and weird.
I agree people have their own opinions, but I just feel just because a friend doesn't stay over at your house doesn't mean he wont cheat. There will be women everywhere, and if you can't even trust that he wouldn't dare cheat with your friend then I feel like there is something else that need to be discussed then a woman friend staying over. As Debobasket101 said If he wants to cheat, he will cheat.
Having a house help who isn't super fine (or whatevs) now THAT makes PERFECT sense. A house help is help, they"re not your friend, they're not your family, they have no sense of loyalty towards you so it definitely makes sense to be careful with those or any other stranger who come in your relationship. Even then men still be having s*x with the house help weather shes, 13, ugly, dirty, whatever and why?? because those men are submitting to their flesh and they're weird. Thats on THEM.
Big Facts but even your blood cousins you need to watch out for. I have a cousin who I had to cut off because she kept making my boyfriend uncomfortable and kept coming onto him. He had to be the one to tell me “Hey, your cousin and auntie are making me uncomfortable” because I was in the “it’s family mindset”. Mind you my auntie is a side chick so she dead was telling my cousin to go after my boyfriend cause he’s a Doctor and once you get him we don’t need to be close to family. People are weird. Even family.
We are human beings, not animals. God has given us the will to make decisions for ourselves. You don't have to submit to the flesh if you don't want to. The way i see my friends, i see them as sisters and theres no way my sister would be in town and i would tell her to stay in a hotel when i have a huge house because i "don't want her around my man." I don't have friend who are envious of me or have ill intent toward but i can understand how women who don't have real friends and real sisterhood could feel this way. The example of Porsha and Falynn is perfect because they were obviously not real friends, they were friend because they were on the show together. Porsha had no sense of loyalty toward Falyn so to her it was just whatever. A real friend (imo) would never even let that thought cross their mind. I've heard stories of men impregnating their wives friends but to me that speaks to the true character of the friend and the husband,, and who they've always been. They are terrible people for doing that and its not the wife's fault because she had them around each other. They are grown human adults who made a decision to do something that would hurt someone they "Loved." Thats on them. As someone who adores their friends and loves them to death i cannot agree with this logic.
I can understand and agree. How I grew up there were a plethora family on my mom and dad’s side and family friends living in my parents home helping my mom with my siblings and I; never heard of a scandal of sorts. I'm 23 now and engaged and my fiance and I have discussed getting a house girl from Nigerian or maybe a Spanish au pair to help with raising our future children. I think it depends on the type of man one has. If he's loyal to his family, he would never let anything mess that up. Typically a good man won't stray unless something is wrong at home. No matter how conventionally attractive another woman is. A good man would understand and risk and realize temporary gratification isn't worth permanent damage to his family unit.
I just came across your channel and decided to stop and listen to you. I fully agree with you and Kierra. I've been married almost 23yrs now. I have NEVER had any of my single friends sleep over at my house and NEVER will nor do I share any marital issues with my single friends. The bible says shun the very appearance of evil.. you never know what is in the heart of someone.
Such wisdom! I totally agree with you. If I can request, I would love a video about your growth and healing journey. How did you get to have such strong values and beliefs and know how to implement them at a young age? How do you live in virtue? I am 22, and though I know the mentality, sometimes I don't live up to the standard I set for myself if that makes sense. Would love to hear your thoughts 💗
Lol when I saw that clip I didn’t even think she was talking about having company staying over while being married. Lol I learned not to just have anyone in my home before I become an adult. Lol.
When one of my aunties got married, her younger sister started an affair with ger husband. The affair continued and my aunty got to know that too. She couldn't do anything. It was too late then. They had twins and she just wanted her family to be peaceful. She tried very hard to marry off her younger sister but she never agreed. Finally her husband k!lled her and covered it up as a heart attack. (he is wealthy and powerful) and married my other aunt, his mistress two days after his wife's death. Never let your man get closer to any other woman no matter what, especially if that's your sister or close friend. They are the worst. Because you are too afraid to confront them in a situation like that.
As a man, I have to say this is a WISE young lady. I am not surprised though...She is Nigerian. You are a WISE young lady. Your man is lucky
There’s a distant relative of mine who’s SISTER got intimate with her husband many years ago when they were in their 20s. They are in their 50s/60s now but their relationship has never been the same. At the end of the day , you can be wise but people who want to cheat will cheat. Also, sometimes you really don’t know the true heart of a person.
Yes! When I meeting my sister at her home and she's not there yet I wait in the car when her hubby is at home.I do this with other family members too. Just seems respectful in my eyes.
Exactly...
Exactly!! A wise women, keep your home and husband to yourself!
Everything you said was SPOT ON. From your own personal boundaries to Kierra. At the end of the day, you can trust, but don't be stupid. Boundaries exist for a reason--to protect yourself from the what ifs.
As a happily married woman of 6 years, to my friend of 17 years, this is a boundary, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. If the two have an understanding it has nothing to do with insecurity. We are very particular on who we allow access to us and our home.
Visiting is one thing staying overnight is another. We have close family and friends who have stayed with us, but these are also people who have known us for all our lives, and are loyal to us. Allowing everyone access to your home and marriage is not wise.
The lady discussing "real friends" and "not having envious friends", ma'am an envious person is not going to say "I envy you", so we don't know. Which is why it's best to have boundaries. I have great faith in my girlfriends and my husband, especially, however, it would be foolish for me to belive that any and everyone is worthy of this trust.
Again, its between those spouses and if they have this agreement then why yall up in arms? Yall wanna come over so bad huh ? lol WHY? Y'all don't have a house?🤣
Well duh an envious friend won’t say they are but you can definitely feel peoples energy. Why be friends with someone if you’re worried they MIGHT be envious of you and why have a spouse you think MIGHT cheat of you when given the chance. You can spin it, turn it, flip it, bop it, whatever you wanna do. I stand by what i said. I wouldn’t necessarily say thinking that way makes someone’s insecure but its definitely questionable and weird.
@@OreOtu ok beloved.
I agree with everything you said. As a wife I definitely move differently out of respect to my marriage, our kids and to keep a happy home.
I agree people have their own opinions, but I just feel just because a friend doesn't stay over at your house doesn't mean he wont cheat. There will be women everywhere, and if you can't even trust that he wouldn't dare cheat with your friend then I feel like there is something else that need to be discussed then a woman friend staying over. As Debobasket101 said If he wants to cheat, he will cheat.
Why give more chances? Are you that naive?
Having a house help who isn't super fine (or whatevs) now THAT makes PERFECT sense. A house help is help, they"re not your friend, they're not your family, they have no sense of loyalty towards you so it definitely makes sense to be careful with those or any other stranger who come in your relationship. Even then men still be having s*x with the house help weather shes, 13, ugly, dirty, whatever and why?? because those men are submitting to their flesh and they're weird. Thats on THEM.
Emphasis on subletting to their flesh!!! So good.
Yea I think it’s pretty common sense to not have everyone in your home.
Big Facts but even your blood cousins you need to watch out for. I have a cousin who I had to cut off because she kept making my boyfriend uncomfortable and kept coming onto him. He had to be the one to tell me “Hey, your cousin and auntie are making me uncomfortable” because I was in the “it’s family mindset”. Mind you my auntie is a side chick so she dead was telling my cousin to go after my boyfriend cause he’s a Doctor and once you get him we don’t need to be close to family. People are weird. Even family.
Love that your speak your mind and you aren’t wrong , Also love your videos !!
We are human beings, not animals. God has given us the will to make decisions for ourselves. You don't have to submit to the flesh if you don't want to. The way i see my friends, i see them as sisters and theres no way my sister would be in town and i would tell her to stay in a hotel when i have a huge house because i "don't want her around my man." I don't have friend who are envious of me or have ill intent toward but i can understand how women who don't have real friends and real sisterhood could feel this way. The example of Porsha and Falynn is perfect because they were obviously not real friends, they were friend because they were on the show together. Porsha had no sense of loyalty toward Falyn so to her it was just whatever. A real friend (imo) would never even let that thought cross their mind. I've heard stories of men impregnating their wives friends but to me that speaks to the true character of the friend and the husband,, and who they've always been. They are terrible people for doing that and its not the wife's fault because she had them around each other. They are grown human adults who made a decision to do something that would hurt someone they "Loved." Thats on them.
As someone who adores their friends and loves them to death i cannot agree with this logic.
I sympathise with your naivety. You man has probably already slept with one of your "sisters". Grow up or you'll lose your husband.
@@sssssssssuv may God be with you.
I can understand and agree. How I grew up there were a plethora family on my mom and dad’s side and family friends living in my parents home helping my mom with my siblings and I; never heard of a scandal of sorts. I'm 23 now and engaged and my fiance and I have discussed getting a house girl from Nigerian or maybe a Spanish au pair to help with raising our future children. I think it depends on the type of man one has. If he's loyal to his family, he would never let anything mess that up. Typically a good man won't stray unless something is wrong at home. No matter how conventionally attractive another woman is. A good man would understand and risk and realize temporary gratification isn't worth permanent damage to his family unit.
I just came across your channel and decided to stop and listen to you. I fully agree with you and Kierra. I've been married almost 23yrs now. I have NEVER had any of my single friends sleep over at my house and NEVER will nor do I share any marital issues with my single friends. The bible says shun the very appearance of evil.. you never know what is in the heart of someone.
Such wisdom! I totally agree with you.
If I can request, I would love a video about your growth and healing journey. How did you get to have such strong values and beliefs and know how to implement them at a young age? How do you live in virtue? I am 22, and though I know the mentality, sometimes I don't live up to the standard I set for myself if that makes sense. Would love to hear your thoughts
💗
LET THEM KNOW! PERIODT
I dont even allow females over my house period I will meet yo at the restaurant or nail shop but Im happily married and gonna stay that way
I agree thousand percent. Some women are simply weird to bring around your home.
Lol when I saw that clip I didn’t even think she was talking about having company staying over while being married. Lol I learned not to just have anyone in my home before I become an adult. Lol.
First of all, my own parents wouldn’t sleep in my home if I was married. My customs said AHT AHT!
When one of my aunties got married, her younger sister started an affair with ger husband. The affair continued and my aunty got to know that too. She couldn't do anything. It was too late then. They had twins and she just wanted her family to be peaceful. She tried very hard to marry off her younger sister but she never agreed. Finally her husband
k!lled her and covered it up as a heart attack. (he is wealthy and powerful) and married my other aunt, his mistress two days after his wife's death. Never let your man get closer to any other woman no matter what, especially if that's your sister or close friend. They are the worst. Because you are too afraid to confront them in a situation like that.
Now that house help…..
???????