I've been questioning whether i was demi romantic for a while and honestly I know when people are pretty/handsome and I love hugging and giving my friends kisses on the cheeks because I know that its just as friends. But I tend to not really get any crushes and I feel uncomfortable when people I'm just friends with or like barely started talking to ask me out and most of the time I never want to take that step forward to have a relationship. Ive only one crush and that was my best friend and I'm currently trying to like hang out with people with a romantic attention and it just doesn't feel right. I'm still not sure if I'm demi romantic or just have commitment issues.. sorry for the rant i just want your opinion... T-T
@@koric3900 that is so real. i can really relate to knowing how to identify when you feel aesthetic attraction, and being a big-time hugger in a platonic way,, as well as getting very uncomfortable at the thought of people expressing that they like me / have romantic feelings for me but i have never crushed on anyone ever, so it can lowkey be hard sometimes to be a new ace and/or aro and not to fall into those intrusive (and lowkey aphobic) thoughts of like: welllllll how do you truly know you’re aspec and you’re not just too young? / you’ve just never dated anyone before so how can you be sure? and i’ve found that there are elements where i can’t be sure! like i know sexuality will definitely come secondarily to romanticism for me, but until i am able to find that romantic relationship, how can i be sure im demisexual and not just asexual? or what if im not actually demiromantic, but just straight up aromantic with a deep rooted desire to one day be in a romantic relationship? (i think that may be called cupioromantic, if you care for microlabels) and again, i don’t think i will know until it happens (or doesn’t lol) but at the end of the day, what matters most about these labels is that they’re just here to provide YOU with comfort. so even tho i don’t like that i can’t definitely pick my terms with 100% certainty, i go with what feels right for now, and leave the door open to be able to shift if need be. and it’s also fun to just use terms like “aspec” so you can identify with the ace/aro community if you’d like, but don’t have to be tied down to one microlabel
@@jacquelinejanicki 2 yrs and im still switching between demi or aro! I just say im on the spectrum cuz its easier. I found someone who rlly likes me and im trying to warm up to the idea. I feel like possibly maybe one day i can like him so im taking it slow! Wish me luck..
Me, when I came out: Mum, I'm aroace Mum: You just haven't found the right person yet,don't give up on love. Me: That's the point. I'm demisexual and demiromantic and still want to date and have a family.
Zoe I've been doing some self reflection to determine if I'm demi and this was so helpful for me! I particularly loved "it’s a really personal experience, and the only person who can truly know who you are is you, so if you’re feeling like you might be asexual or aromantic or on those spectrums, then you probably are. If you feel a connection with it, then it’s yours.” Thank you for being such a great, validating, and uplifting resource!
It took me a while to find out I’m both demisexual and demiromantic and I feel so relieved once I found out, it’s so cool to finally found someone else who identifies as both too and hear your perspective!
It’s interesting to hear that it’s possible to have crushes but not want a relationship with the person ur crushing on. For me I only want relationships with people I’m crushing on because when I’m crushing on someone I feel sexually and romantically attracted to them and don’t usually experience those types of attraction outside of having that crush. Then the only way to even form a crush on someone is to bond with them and I haven’t been able to bond easily with people lately. Most of the time it hasn’t worked out with anyone because of all that but honestly just having the demi labels out here to use helps me accept that difficulty. That plus fictional characters cause it’s way easier to crush on fictional characters.
Aw I like your personality. You’re like sure of yourself and your beliefs and create like a comfortable space, it then makes me more confident in my own beliefs .
Cupioromantic and demiromantic here! Still trying to figure out my sexual attraction part, and I think it might be somewhere on the Greysexual spectrum. I’m still in the closet, but always great to learn more from others on the spectrum!
I've had my own bestfriend, parents and family invalidate me. AND THE WAY YOU FIND ATTRACTION WITH UR GF IS THE SAME WAY I FEEL WITH MY CRUSH NOW SO I FEEL SO VALID TYSMM ❤️❤️❤️ And even better, he thinks im valid 🥰
Thank u so much for this video, really :). I was unsure whether I was demi or not because I've had very few crushes but they were just aesthetic attraction and not necessarily wanting a relationship or anything with them. But now I know that there's different types of attraction and the only times I've felt romantic and sexual attraction was after feeling a connection or emotional bond with someone. Something that bothers me though is that people assume that being demi means only being attracted romantically and/or sexually to your friends (or people you've known for a long time/years/many months) since the emotional bond is strong but it isn't like that. I guess for some demi people it is like that but for me I just need a somewhat strong emotional connection and trust (not necessarily knowing them for a long time, because it's possible for me to feel a strong emotional bond in a shorter amount of time), I'd actually hate being with a friend. So yeah, this video really made me feel, for the first time in my life, like I belong somewhere and that I can finally feel identified or relate to something :D
Omg, I feel the same thing. I always thought I was aromantic, but I realized recently that that's probably not the case. I'm still not sure though if what I feel for them is romantic, I very often experience aesthetic attraction, so I'm going to wait on it, but for the first time, I feel as if I want to start a relationship with them; at the same time though I feel as if if I'm wrong that'll ruin our friendship. Got any advice?(if not that's fine)
@@urlocalfridge2699 Hm. I once had an aesthetic crush on a friend, but never thought about the possibility of starting a relationship, but that might be due to my age back then. To this day I'm still not sure if there was a romantic feeling behind that aesthetic crush since he was my friend. So, like you, I was confused whether or not it was romantic attraction as well. I'd say wait it out just a bit more. But you're saying you actually feel like you want to start a relationship with them, so maybe leave the worries out of what you're actually feeling and try to notice how you act around the person and what your thoughts are. Then maybe you'll determine whether or not you actually feel that romantic attraction :). If you feel peace with them and want to spend time with them, then maybe that's a sign. Then when you're sure the romantic attraction is there, go for it. Spend more time with them and perhaps just the two of you and read the other person's feelings. I know it isn't enough of an advice but I hope it helps a bit!
Thank you for your video 🥺 it helps me to realise I am demiromantic (already new that I was,demisexual and I was trying to find any info about demiromantic)
Im still figuring out if im aromantic or just commitment issues But i feel a different type of way towards fictional characters, i think about this character constantly and i really like their personality. Am i aromantic or just crazily obsessed with things that are not real??
I've been having a crisis over if I'm demiromantic or not and actually I feel, I know that I'm probably potentially denying myself what I am. But well yk de Nial is a river in Egypt
I am somewhere on the aroace-spectrum, but I don't know where exactly and because of this I just go with it, if it hapoens ut happens if not then not. I don't feel like I need it, because every contact I need I can get from my sister eith whom I have a very strong connection, I don't feel like I need anything sexual or romantic, my sister is the same and it helped me with accepting tgat I am on the spectrum, because I am not alone.
Hey, I'm aroace and this video has been very validating and important 💚💜 I'm curious about your lesbian identity... I think I've always liked girls but I never really understood that kind of liking I was experiencing bc it just wasn't sexual or romantic... but I think I like girls. Is this possible? Aroace & lesbian?
Hi! I’m ace as well (possibly aro - not entirely sure of my romantic attraction yet) and read your comment. I think it is possible! It’s just a different form of attraction I think. I don’t know much of how to answer this, however, the RUclipsr Anthony Padilla interviewed 3 aromatic people and one of them was married to a woman and the video sort of touches on how their relationship works. I’ve pasted in the link below. I hope it helps answer your question! :) ruclips.net/video/Giscu5wuC_U/видео.html
Okay but I need help...I feel like I'm demisexual but I'm so confused whether I'm demiromantic or not. It fits good with how I'm feeling but the thing is, I'm really want to be in a relationship and I've tried cus I'm curious but I either don't feel attracted to them or I do but when I get too close to them I shove them away but after I regret doing so and I understand I have feeling towards them. Is that demiromantic or am I just picky or scared...maybe it's obvious for some but I really don't understand...🤔🤨
Not necessarily. It can also be based on other emotional bonds. Like trauma bonds. Which I guess you could call “romantic” it just depends on your definition.
I feel attraction to a celebrity the same way you feel it with your girlfriend. I know I will never meet but my heart always wants to meet him. And then I want to be an actor thats why it makes my desire to meet him more. Can you please tell me how can I stop thinking about it?
Any other questions about being asexual and/or aromantic? Drop them below! ☺
I've been questioning whether i was demi romantic for a while and honestly I know when people are pretty/handsome and I love hugging and giving my friends kisses on the cheeks because I know that its just as friends. But I tend to not really get any crushes and I feel uncomfortable when people I'm just friends with or like barely started talking to ask me out and most of the time I never want to take that step forward to have a relationship. Ive only one crush and that was my best friend and I'm currently trying to like hang out with people with a romantic attention and it just doesn't feel right. I'm still not sure if I'm demi romantic or just have commitment issues.. sorry for the rant i just want your opinion... T-T
Where can I find the video you talked about at 6:08
@@koric3900 that is so real. i can really relate to knowing how to identify when you feel aesthetic attraction, and being a big-time hugger in a platonic way,, as well as getting very uncomfortable at the thought of people expressing that they like me / have romantic feelings for me
but i have never crushed on anyone ever, so it can lowkey be hard sometimes to be a new ace and/or aro and not to fall into those intrusive (and lowkey aphobic) thoughts of like: welllllll how do you truly know you’re aspec and you’re not just too young? / you’ve just never dated anyone before so how can you be sure?
and i’ve found that there are elements where i can’t be sure! like i know sexuality will definitely come secondarily to romanticism for me, but until i am able to find that romantic relationship, how can i be sure im demisexual and not just asexual? or what if im not actually demiromantic, but just straight up aromantic with a deep rooted desire to one day be in a romantic relationship? (i think that may be called cupioromantic, if you care for microlabels)
and again, i don’t think i will know until it happens (or doesn’t lol)
but at the end of the day, what matters most about these labels is that they’re just here to provide YOU with comfort. so even tho i don’t like that i can’t definitely pick my terms with 100% certainty, i go with what feels right for now, and leave the door open to be able to shift if need be. and it’s also fun to just use terms like “aspec” so you can identify with the ace/aro community if you’d like, but don’t have to be tied down to one microlabel
@@jacquelinejanicki 2 yrs and im still switching between demi or aro! I just say im on the spectrum cuz its easier. I found someone who rlly likes me and im trying to warm up to the idea. I feel like possibly maybe one day i can like him so im taking it slow! Wish me luck..
@@koric3900 wowowow
that’s great, good luck!
So important to educate people that there really is a very wide spectrum when it comes to romantic and/or sexual attractions.
Yessss🥰🌈
Me, when I came out: Mum, I'm aroace
Mum: You just haven't found the right person yet,don't give up on love.
Me: That's the point. I'm demisexual and demiromantic and still want to date and have a family.
Zoe I've been doing some self reflection to determine if I'm demi and this was so helpful for me! I particularly loved "it’s a really personal experience, and the only person who can truly know who you are is you, so if you’re feeling like you might be asexual or aromantic or on those spectrums, then you probably are. If you feel a connection with it, then it’s yours.” Thank you for being such a great, validating, and uplifting resource!
It took me a while to find out I’m both demisexual and demiromantic and I feel so relieved once I found out, it’s so cool to finally found someone else who identifies as both too and hear your perspective!
It’s interesting to hear that it’s possible to have crushes but not want a relationship with the person ur crushing on. For me I only want relationships with people I’m crushing on because when I’m crushing on someone I feel sexually and romantically attracted to them and don’t usually experience those types of attraction outside of having that crush. Then the only way to even form a crush on someone is to bond with them and I haven’t been able to bond easily with people lately. Most of the time it hasn’t worked out with anyone because of all that but honestly just having the demi labels out here to use helps me accept that difficulty. That plus fictional characters cause it’s way easier to crush on fictional characters.
Aw I like your personality. You’re like sure of yourself and your beliefs and create like a comfortable space, it then makes me more confident in my own beliefs .
Cupioromantic and demiromantic here! Still trying to figure out my sexual attraction part, and I think it might be somewhere on the Greysexual spectrum. I’m still in the closet, but always great to learn more from others on the spectrum!
This video felt so safe and supportive 😊
I've had my own bestfriend, parents and family invalidate me.
AND THE WAY YOU FIND ATTRACTION WITH UR GF IS THE SAME WAY I FEEL WITH MY CRUSH NOW SO I FEEL SO VALID TYSMM ❤️❤️❤️
And even better, he thinks im valid 🥰
Thank u so much for this video, really :). I was unsure whether I was demi or not because I've had very few crushes but they were just aesthetic attraction and not necessarily wanting a relationship or anything with them. But now I know that there's different types of attraction and the only times I've felt romantic and sexual attraction was after feeling a connection or emotional bond with someone. Something that bothers me though is that people assume that being demi means only being attracted romantically and/or sexually to your friends (or people you've known for a long time/years/many months) since the emotional bond is strong but it isn't like that. I guess for some demi people it is like that but for me I just need a somewhat strong emotional connection and trust (not necessarily knowing them for a long time, because it's possible for me to feel a strong emotional bond in a shorter amount of time), I'd actually hate being with a friend. So yeah, this video really made me feel, for the first time in my life, like I belong somewhere and that I can finally feel identified or relate to something :D
Omg, I feel the same thing. I always thought I was aromantic, but I realized recently that that's probably not the case. I'm still not sure though if what I feel for them is romantic, I very often experience aesthetic attraction, so I'm going to wait on it, but for the first time, I feel as if I want to start a relationship with them; at the same time though I feel as if if I'm wrong that'll ruin our friendship. Got any advice?(if not that's fine)
@@urlocalfridge2699 Hm. I once had an aesthetic crush on a friend, but never thought about the possibility of starting a relationship, but that might be due to my age back then. To this day I'm still not sure if there was a romantic feeling behind that aesthetic crush since he was my friend. So, like you, I was confused whether or not it was romantic attraction as well. I'd say wait it out just a bit more. But you're saying you actually feel like you want to start a relationship with them, so maybe leave the worries out of what you're actually feeling and try to notice how you act around the person and what your thoughts are. Then maybe you'll determine whether or not you actually feel that romantic attraction :). If you feel peace with them and want to spend time with them, then maybe that's a sign. Then when you're sure the romantic attraction is there, go for it. Spend more time with them and perhaps just the two of you and read the other person's feelings. I know it isn't enough of an advice but I hope it helps a bit!
Thank you it really help to listen to other people experience and your answers are clear and accepting
P. S Winnie is so adorable
This is so validating! Thanks for sharing your experience, I appreciate it. Sending you a big virtual hug! 🫂
-a fellow demi aroace, lesbian
This was sooooo helpful. Thank you!!!!!💓
Thank you for your video 🥺 it helps me to realise I am demiromantic (already new that I was,demisexual and I was trying to find any info about demiromantic)
thank you, i feel like i finally understand myself, and it feels nice :)
my mind is blown. I can have crushes when I'm aro?????? o fuck... i have to go through another identity crisis
It all makes sense. Yup, I just might be demisexual and demiromantic.
Im still figuring out if im aromantic or just commitment issues But i feel a different type of way towards fictional characters, i think about this character constantly and i really like their personality. Am i aromantic or just crazily obsessed with things that are not real??
What a bright shining human 🌟 This is good energy
I've been having a crisis over if I'm demiromantic or not and actually I feel, I know that I'm probably potentially denying myself what I am. But well yk de Nial is a river in Egypt
Hi, I recently found out I'm Demi-Biromantic Ace
yay!!! that's so awesome!
No worries you’ll grow it out
I am somewhere on the aroace-spectrum, but I don't know where exactly and because of this I just go with it, if it hapoens ut happens if not then not. I don't feel like I need it, because every contact I need I can get from my sister eith whom I have a very strong connection, I don't feel like I need anything sexual or romantic, my sister is the same and it helped me with accepting tgat I am on the spectrum, because I am not alone.
Hey, I'm aroace and this video has been very validating and important 💚💜
I'm curious about your lesbian identity... I think I've always liked girls but I never really understood that kind of liking I was experiencing bc it just wasn't sexual or romantic... but I think I like girls. Is this possible? Aroace & lesbian?
Hi! I’m ace as well (possibly aro - not entirely sure of my romantic attraction yet) and read your comment. I think it is possible! It’s just a different form of attraction I think. I don’t know much of how to answer this, however, the RUclipsr Anthony Padilla interviewed 3 aromatic people and one of them was married to a woman and the video sort of touches on how their relationship works. I’ve pasted in the link below. I hope it helps answer your question! :)
ruclips.net/video/Giscu5wuC_U/видео.html
Thank youuu so very much for this. I appreciate it 💘🙏🏼
Okay but I need help...I feel like I'm demisexual but I'm so confused whether I'm demiromantic or not. It fits good with how I'm feeling but the thing is, I'm really want to be in a relationship and I've tried cus I'm curious but I either don't feel attracted to them or I do but when I get too close to them I shove them away but after I regret doing so and I understand I have feeling towards them. Is that demiromantic or am I just picky or scared...maybe it's obvious for some but I really don't understand...🤔🤨
Your experience is the closest to mine that I’ve found. I am confused too 😭
@@emilyk9756 glad I'm not alone! I guess we'll find our true self with time..at least I hope so🥲
I relate, idk either 😭
Thank you 💚
Thank you, I found this video helpful.
as a demisexual I understand it's "feeling sexual attraction after an emotional bond is formed" is that emotional bond romantic?
Not necessarily. It can also be based on other emotional bonds. Like trauma bonds. Which I guess you could call “romantic” it just depends on your definition.
I feel attraction to a celebrity the same way you feel it with your girlfriend. I know I will never meet but my heart always wants to meet him. And then I want to be an actor thats why it makes my desire to meet him more. Can you please tell me how can I stop thinking about it?
Demiromantic+aesexual😊
i can't figure out if i'm demisexual, graysexual, or both, or demiromantic 😭
yo
ikr this is so hard 😭😭
dude maybe i'm even heteroromantic asexual
I mean you could be both demi
I realised i missed the information seeing winnie
I think Winnie finds Zoe's thumb rather tasty
Hahahaha
"Hmm, kinky!"