Gaslighting an Employee in Project | Is your Manager Gaslighting you ?
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- Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024
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Invalidation of your experiences: Your concerns, ideas, or experiences are consistently dismissed or minimized by colleagues or superiors. For example, if you raise a valid issue with a project or process and are told that you're overreacting or being too sensitive.
Constantly changing expectations: You find that the expectations for your work or performance are constantly shifting, making it difficult for you to meet them. When you seek clarification, you're made to feel like you should have already known what was expected of you.
Blame-shifting: When something goes wrong, you're consistently blamed for mistakes or failures, even when you're not solely responsible. This can erode your confidence and make you doubt your abilities.
Undermining your competence: Colleagues or superiors consistently question your skills or expertise, even in areas where you have proven yourself capable. This can lead to self-doubt and a lack of confidence in your abilities.
Isolation and exclusion: You feel isolated or excluded from important meetings, discussions, or decision-making processes without valid reasons. This can make you feel like your contributions are not valued or respected.
Manipulative behavior: You notice that colleagues or superiors use manipulative tactics, such as guilt-tripping, gaslighting, or emotional manipulation, to control or influence your actions or decisions.
Denial of reality: When you bring up concerns or issues, they are denied or dismissed outright, making you feel like you're imagining things or exaggerating the situation.
Double standards: You're held to different standards or rules than your colleagues, or you're subjected to rules that seem arbitrary or unfair.
Feeling confused or disoriented: Gaslighting can leave you feeling confused, disoriented, or unsure of your own perceptions and reality. You may start to question your memory, judgment, or sanity.
Feeling constantly on edge: Gaslighting can create a toxic work environment where you feel constantly on edge, anxious, or stressed. This can have a detrimental effect on your mental and emotional well-being.
Valuable source of information.
Whatever happens always be kind to each other.
Coming to the story, I had a bihari friend we were to much close. I is to share everything with him. But actually he was a Informer. Every information he is to inform manager and other teammates to increase his gross.He is to make fun on me in my absence, He only used me to make screens however he was not good at making screens. He used me, fought with me made all the damage as I leave organisation. Manager never ever supported me. Toxic work culture, toxic people around me. However I quit the job before taking upraisal a week ago. Normal people without background are difficult to survive in corporate world. Fake fellows are treated good. Good people work well and get blames more.
These biharis are very dangerous. Even some kannadigas too.
Reddy?@@hymathjohn
Kamma naa batta le kadha 😂
Don't believe any body in corporate. Have fake belief..
Also they are not your friends anymore. It's a bussiness
@@user-wq8jp1ww3k avunaa 😂😂😂 nannu telugolle thokkadaaniki try chesinaaru. I have a Kannadiga best friend whos been a friend for 5 years now. 2 Telugu leads who became managers ensured competition with them is crushed. competition ante Telufu, Non-Telugu ane thedaa ledhu. A Tamilian said he'd have hated Telugus but for his association with 2 of us Telugus through these incidents.. I have 2 Telugus, 1 Kannadiga who are the closest followed by the Tamilian person even after a year of leaving my prior organization. My lead who was a Mallu was far far better than this Telugu guy. So, my 2 cents never even go by ethnicity but as we can gel and understand the culture, jokes, food everything better of fellow Telugus. I'm undoubtedly close to 2 Telugus and the Kannadiga who is also from a rural (town background coz for me anything not city is rural as I'm from a town myself) and hence we have certain wavelength in thoughts that matches each of our personality. One thing, of more than a decade in the organization and atleast few thousands around me, I'm close to 3 people. I've gone through these betrayals, back biting, gas lighting etc., not just ne, many of us do.. but some how was fortunate enough to have 3 of them who are my 3am friends and atleasr 8-10 friendly people if not friends. So, be cautious when sharing information but don't stop trusting as well as we need good friends to de-stress and become light through our stressful jobs
I faced all this in my previous org, they even discriminated me cause Iam south Indian...questioned my capability every min...I quit in that company and till date they are searching for my replacement 😂😂😂 cause no one is ready to take my place among those toxic people😂😂
Karma karma karma...😂 karma won't leave anyone...everydog has a day...😊
emi company guru .. naaku telusu kovali ani curiou gaa undhi
3 or 4 companies change aithe vaadikey telustadi.. be ready to change company always.. you worked and they paid anthe… don’t take things personally unless you are passionate about what you are doing.. most people work for only salary.
100 percent agreed
I have been working in IT for 11+ years... Almost all these things I faced, in fact I have faced more than what you raised. What you said is absolutely everything is 100% correct.
9:07 ఇది అమ్మాయిలకి స్పెషల్ 😁😁... నేను ఇంతకుముందు చేసిన కంపెనీ లో ప్రాజెక్ట్ మేనేజర్ పదిహేను రోజులు నిద్రపోతూ వర్క్ ఇవ్వలేదు . తరువాత ఆ వెధవ మేలుకొని డిప్యూటీ మేనేజర్ కి నేను అసలు వర్క్ చెయ్యడం లేదు అని చెప్పాడు ... నన్ను పిలిచి సంభందం లేని తిట్లు తిట్టి వెళ్ళమన్నాడు . అది ఒక పెద్ద 'కమ్మ 'టి కంపెనీ ... మీకు అర్ధమయ్యే ఉంటుంది ...
Same I too suffer Like this..
Kamma , brahmins ee msladhya vaishyas lo groupism vundi
E caste pichi valla antha collapse 🎉
I faced this in my support project, manager is somewhat good but the team mates are very toxic, every day they used to fight against themselves and I saw these office politics and after 8 months in that hell I asked manager to release from the project, he tried to convince me to stay in the project but after one month I've managed to get out of that project. We can't grow in those kind of projects, leaving from that project is the only solution.
How u managed to get release
Which company your are working
మీరు చెప్పే విషయాలు ప్రతి చోట జరుగుతుంటాయి, కొంత టైం పీరియడ్ వెయిట్ చేయాలి, ఏదొక ఒక విషయం లో మీరు ప్లస్ లో ఉంటారు, ఆ విషయం లో మీరు అమాయకం గా చెప్పేయ కూడదు వాళ్లకు ఆ విషయం చెప్పుతామని కొంత ఎక్సయిట మెంట్ క్రియేట్ చేయటం వల్ల వాళ్ళ వీక్ పాయింట్స్ మనకు తెలుస్తుంటాయి వాళ్ళ సమాచారం వీక్ పౌంట్స్ మనకు తెలిసే కొద్ది మిమ్మల్లి తక్కువచేసినోడు సైలెంట్ అవ్వూతరు, ఆ టైం లో ఆయన కన్నా పెద్దాయనతో ఆడపడడప మాట్లాడటం స్ట్రాట్ చేయాలి, సిట్యువేషన్ పూయిగా మన కంట్రోల్ లోకి వస్తుంది
Actual scenarios in startups are worse. The moment one commits a mistake it's death bells, he will be fired for sure in the next round. Because of oversupply, AI, change in tech landscape making IT the worst sector to be in.
What you said is absolutely correct.
I have faced this in my current company.
Not just managers, even some long term employees like SSEs who have settled in companies from long years, don't even care about new inputs.
In my current company and team, there is an SSE (not from india) who simply rejects ideas of any newly joined employees, and discourages any other idea. I would suggest enquire before joining any team. If there is someone who already settled and made a powerhouse for himself/herself, ignore that team.
Excellent Video, Chandana Pavan Garu. We all have faced at least one of the types of Gaslighting behaviours from Colleagues or so-called Senior Management people. This sort of worst behaviour is observed with Indian managers only. I worked with foreign clients. They are very respective of us and value our ideas and suggestions.
Please continue creating these types of videos and educating us.
Thank you.
Awesome video. Reality exposed!!! Thanks!
💯 correct annna 😭 💔
Family antha m undad
Andr mundala thitudu
Rude ga, treating lyk bug .....
Apud pothano arthmkatley mental pain tho but family valla m chylo thelika narkam undi
Enka full topics chey anna
Oka okka video chey anna e IT lo after 50years old enti nxt , and fresh to last STG of designation ala alaa manage chyli mental stress nd other various factors
And
Freshee ga java lo joi mayi 2.5 year chsi nachaka sap or other domain ki ala shift avali
How to over come the fear of sr people rudeness everytym , fear of loosing job, ala m m things ani jagrathaga manage chskvli salary investment, job lo unpdu m m thinks save chskvli, nd what to learn effectively to be in good position
Plz anna e topic mida chyndi
Hmmm these kind of situations will be every where. One should know how to handle it gracefully and it comes by experience. You need to learn how to make data evidence for everything and escalate if things aren’t working as expected.
❤
Very real..esp the last advice is true. We can't change the situation or people, only needs to learn to adapt else it'll be very stressful
No Bro, now a days HR also supporting to managers. I mean if you talk about your issue with HR, his/her immediate reply will be "please check with your manager".
I hope if the same culture will be continued for next seven to ten years, few of big it companies have to be close definately.
It's all because of lack monitoring by organization and they will fall down.
I don't know why organization is helping and more supportive to these type of Managers. This will be run for few years but organization reputation and credibility will be loss in future because of this culture.
yes
Yes, I have faced same situation with ex manager and not able to bare the stress , informed the same to HR. You know what HR advised me, please leave it and not to take it personnally
We can deal with this gaslighting by cleverly saying no to few situations and always go with data
Can you please tell us the solutions for these problems?!!!!
Mana takentuni penchjunta munduku povatame.. incompetent people try to drag us.. we no need to give a shit about those kojjas.. just keep quite improve your skills.. your work will talk.. if not just move out
KT sessions project marinappudu sarigga ivvakapathe yemi cheyalan na... oka video cheyagalara?
Bro i want this this type of videos.
Please do one more video part 2 politics in corporate culture and work environment.
Awesome, 100% true!
Bro, including pharma industry also we have observed same scenarios..
1:12 ikkada kooda pareto rule apply avthadha 80:20 rule
Politics is common at workplaces and institutes. You cannot ignore them. At least you are getting paid, there are many victims of office politics who don't even get paid what they are worth.
Everyone has their own career goals and targets at the workplace. Friction is unavoidable. The situations you described can destroy your career. Beware of career destroyers and avoid them. You should focus on contributing to the organization you are working for while maintaining your personal integrity and not losing focus on career goals.
Well said brother!
It’s continuous skill improvement and contribution that keep us going up and up.
Yeah politics are more in Indian IT 😂, I guess ur not that toxic manager
Hi sir...not in corporate world even in outside world in communities it will happen like that it happened to me like i jst quit /left those people slowly...and started questioning them frm that time onwards felt like i got much freedom and confidence and jst didn't care them afterwards they only came to me...then i felt very happy karma will do its own work no problem...😊
north Indian manager did this to me.... Director too was his home town fellow.... but finally i left the company and got promoted with in a year...
UP manager ( he grew magically under UP director ) with hekp of UP director crushed many south indians... I was last one..
Nice information for awareness...Please do video on if suppose se level having more package than TL THEN how to handle situations when we join in new company...
Anna pls make videos on pcb design and it’s growth …! In India 🇮🇳
Mee videos ni, mee managers ki matram chupinchakandi.
I am just kidding. Just started watching your videos. My best wishes.
Super bro.. in every sector office politics are there in extreme manner
Hi bro, the talk is all about the problem.... What is the solution?
Faced same issues with my manager he is fraud person who keeps fraud bills in the monthly allowance always try to impress the client with wrong information and later blame the engineer for any issue
Toxic manager and colleagues
being a Telugu person I am telling this don’t believe even your Telugu colleagues remember they are only colleagues not your friends
Best thing get prepare on your subject and move on when you feel you can’t survive in that place
valuable information thank you very much chandan garu
ammaiki ilanti issue vasthe opposition lo vunnadi company director ina kuda peeki avathalestharu companies lo
Output comes with respect and sportive
Hello sir, Please solutions kuda cheppandi not just problems...
Valuable experience for new comers. Keep going sir
100% Correct
Iam facing this right now all the points which were discussed in this video. Truly they don't know what the person going through. Some times it taking me to suicide tendency also
Don't think like that, try to explain your situation to your senior management, voice out. If things do not work out, look for other opportunities. Don't take any hard decisions, this is just a very small phase of your life. It too will pass, don't worry, all the best to you
Please don't make such decisions. If you don't like just look for other opportunities. They are doing like that only like demoral, trying to down your confidence level. But loose your confidence at any time. You have your confidence on your skills. They try to down that confidence. Your strength is your confidence on your talent and you can do and win with that. No one will theft your talent. Take deep Breathe once and try for other opportunities. Best of luck.
Pls go for counseling
Show them wat u r by ur work...and correct time u give them nicely..talk to them in front of everyone...not privately....they will fall in their own pits for sure.....
Very good explanation
Yes.. It's true.. It's an universal problem
Thank you Pavan
excellent suggestions tq
Hi bro, nenu tcs job chesedanni nenu backdoor job vere valla tho chepinchanu vallu doriki poyadu vadu na name kuda cheppadadu nannu kuda job lonundi thisesru nenu tcs lo 2.8 years experience undi mail nanne pettammannaru personal problem ani nenu mail pattanu payslip vachay portal. Mail chesthe senior management daggara undi niku reliving letter and experience latter evvalaleda ani vallu discussion chesthunnaru annaru kani nenu eppatiki tcs nundi bayataku vachi 100 days aindi naku vere company lo job kuda vachindi vallu submit cheyamantunnaru naku reliving letter and experience latter vasthaya rava bro pls cheppansi
senior management ki polite ga oka email petatndi, evarite idi handle chestunnaro or at least aa group ki, vallu oppukuni istara ante cheppalemu sister, but me case lo ivvachu, email petti follow up chestu undandi.
@@ChandanaPavanTech Hi bro
Chesthune unnanu kani senior management ki gmail cheyatani ledu anta hr tho matladhthune unna vallu chepthene maku thelusthadi memu am cheyataniki undadu antunnaru bro
Nice and informative.
If manager is ocd in his work it happens
Yes 💯 💯 true..!!
I also faced this situation...
There is no such professionalism in this world anymore
100% correct. For this better we be professional to the possible extent this might bring back change in this world.
@@pvkr4613 Don't expect too much my friend, I hv created a friendly environment in my recent project and we were working happily for 7 months and one small conflict, thats it. all of sudden a new manager just joined the team and he spoiled everything in a month.
Thank you bro for valuable advice ❤❤
Good Evening sir
I got an opportunity as US IT recruiter. Is this will have career growth please suggest me..
If you need a job immediately join that first. Later if you find time & interested to learn new skills, then upskill and change
Use this job to gain some soft skills and organizational skills.
These are pretty much needed for every job. And these are transferable skills.
While doing this job you need to acquire skills needed for your dream job and apply.
Stay focused on dream job and never sleep without learning skills required for new job.
yo .. join and hire me.
Iam pursuing MBA 1st year did iam eligible ❤ please tell me sister
Good analysis keep doing
Anna pyhton or Java edi best anna
Python
Python
@@avellanki kani jave ke ekkuva openings vunnay ga
One kaadu bro chala nerchukovaali
First take a crash course of JAVA and then concentrate on python. Keep your eye on AI technologies also and keep update your self.
100percent true in my life
అన్నమాట అన్నమాట కాదు బయ్యా ఉన్నమాటే 😀
వైజాగ్ ఆ పవన్ మీది.
Corporate world is pure lucha world...... No one is talented.......
Yes talented vallani thokkestaru
Good information.
telugu vadi ga vundatam IT lo peddha shapam ga marindhi anna
Nice Sir
Correct
Good one bro, important topic
I am facing this
HR Koda dongale
I have seen one person named pradeep sibala such a wasteful person.......... He always compare with others......