The Rejection Myth: How to Overcome Fear of Rejection

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  • Опубликовано: 16 сен 2024
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    In this episode of The Charged Life, high performance coach and #1 New York Times bestselling self-help author Brendon Burchard shares how to overcome fear of rejection.
    Quotables: "I'm not going to limit my service or my message to the world based on what other people think. I am my own person and I'm going to be myself regardless. If we all shrunk in our ability to serve because of what some people might think where would we be as humans? Go out and be great - and never apologize for it." - @BrendonBurchard
    This is Brendon speaking freestyle, recorded in one take without prompter or notes. Post your comments and questions for him below, and he might do an episode answering your question freestyle.
    --------------------
    ABOUT BRENDON BURCHARD
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    Brendon Burchard is one of the most followed personal development trainers of our time and he is in the Top 100 Most Followed Public Figures on Facebook. A #1 New York Times bestselling author, his books include The Motivation Manifesto, The Charge, The Millionaire Messenger, and Life’s Golden Ticket. He is also the founder of High Performance Academy, the legendary personal development program for achievers, and Experts Academy, the world’s most comprehensive marketing training for authors, speakers, coaches, and online thought leaders. For these works, Larry King named Brendon "one of the top motivation and marketing trainers in the world."
    After a car accident at 19 years old inspired him to turn his life around and follow his dreams, and then having the blessings to become a multimillionaire writer and trainer by the age of 32, Brendon has dedicated his life to helping others find their charge and share their voice with the world. His posts now reach more than 10,000,000 people per week worldwide, and he is the star and executive producer of the #1 self-help show on RUclips. His podcast, The Charged Life, debuted at #1 on iTunes across all categories in multiple countries.
    Meet Brendon at www.BrendonBurc...
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    ABOUT THE CHARGED LIFE
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    The Charged Life is a weekly self-help show full of #motivation, #inspiration, and #high performance strategies with bestselling author, motivational speaker and High Performance Academy founder Brendon Burchard. Filmed in one take, without any notes or prompter, the show has become one of the most viewed direct-to-camera self-help series in the history of RUclips. It's also been the #1 Podcast in all of iTunes and is regularly in the top podcasts in Self-Help and Health categories around the globe. Subscribe to the free motivational podcast here: itun.es/i66Y78r
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Комментарии • 592

  • @RockandRollsince1992
    @RockandRollsince1992 10 лет назад +483

    The big problem of rejection is that most people who reject you are the ones that you care the most about. Thats why it hurts so much.....

    • @pedrospain571
      @pedrospain571 10 лет назад +14

      So true!

    • @fantasticsakina
      @fantasticsakina 7 лет назад +6

      RockandRoll1992 yeh it hurts alot.

    • @tia4203
      @tia4203 5 лет назад +6

      That’s all I kept thinking

    • @shivam_bhalla
      @shivam_bhalla 5 лет назад +2

      This is a great video! I also just published a video on fear of failure which goes hand in hand for fear of rejection. Its also my first video, so I hope it can be useful to others!

    • @ibear162
      @ibear162 5 лет назад +2

      yɛร!! it'ร ʀɛɑʆʆy hurt

  • @deanpd3402
    @deanpd3402 8 лет назад +67

    "Go out and be great and never apologise for it", brought tears to my eyes.

  • @timemanagementandaccountab2844
    @timemanagementandaccountab2844 8 лет назад +75

    Rejection is a sign of strength to stand up for what we believe in. It's not negative at all, it's testament to rich diversity of human experience and belief. Everyone has an opinion, blessed be those free enough to express it. Cursed is he whom is unwilling to listen learn and adapt. Great video.

    • @taraswertelecki9886
      @taraswertelecki9886 2 года назад +1

      In and of itself it might not be, but the WAY people reject others can be VERY harmful.

  • @RebeccaYourBusinessDesigner
    @RebeccaYourBusinessDesigner 6 лет назад +35

    This is so so good. I recommend it to everyone. Fear of rejection holds so many people back and keeps them from stepping into their calling and spreading their message. People NEED to hear this!

  • @reddmic2008
    @reddmic2008 10 лет назад +97

    Overcome rejection with girls by knowing almost most girls are insecure because they want someone is the opposite, know that everyone is similar like going home to do the same things people do at home, we all do weird shit, we all have quirks, we all have bad habits, know what you are good at and getting rejected feels like getting struck out in baseball. it doesnt last long. Plus the more you try the easier it is to try

    • @germancelaya5647
      @germancelaya5647 10 лет назад

      very
      interesting!

    • @AzraelPercussionNEO
      @AzraelPercussionNEO 10 лет назад +5

      Now there is someone with wisdom under their belt.

    • @iwishyouknew3413
      @iwishyouknew3413 7 лет назад +7

      Its called reality. Work on yourself and self worth without blaming or excusing the people, situations and unforseen circumstances that people felt entitled in their mind to ever experience. Its acceptance. Across the Board.

    • @exotics5984
      @exotics5984 5 лет назад +2

      I think this comment helped more than the video thank you

    • @selectasanipremium
      @selectasanipremium 7 месяцев назад

      @@exotics5984real

  • @MindsetMattersYT
    @MindsetMattersYT 4 года назад +10

    I dealt with the fear of rejection for a very long time!
    When things are left unsolved it affects us until we examine those things just like you said.
    Unfortunately some people take a long time to come around to taking a step back to viewing their life and realizing that we have the power to overcome these occurances!

  • @mily7960
    @mily7960 8 лет назад +41

    I love this : Go out and be great,and never apologize for it!😊 Brendon is the best! Thank you!

  • @roguevibez1284
    @roguevibez1284 9 лет назад +4

    Fear of rejection is a very strong feeling. I know because I have been through it, and I have felt the true intensity of it when I was much younger but the older I got, the more I had to get over it. Fear of rejection is a temporary thing if you make it out to be. Off course you have to accept it and not be ashamed of it in order to fully overcome it in the long run but here is one simple truth: TIME IS LIMITED. We all have dreams we want to accomplish. We all want to live that life where we are happy and have that feeling of finally belonging and finding our place in the world. But we have so little time to do it! The fact is the older we get the more demanding our life becomes. You don't want to be a dependant forever, you don't want to sit on the sidelines while you watch other people excel in life, you don't want to be jealous of others because they have what you were longing to have, those people did it, they got over it. We are not alone, everyone goes through struggles and fear of rejection is one of those struggles. I had to learn to overcome fear of rejection by actually doing the thing I feared the most, which was actually getting rejected! It wasn't so bad, being ignored, not being acknowledged wasn't as apocalyptic as I thought it was. The more I got rejected, the more I laughed about it and the more free and relieved I became. I can say I am much more tougher than I was when I was younger.
    The key point is, we cannot make everyone happy, and people are going to talk trash behind our back no matter what, so you might as well dive in and get dirty. It's not so bad, the only thing you can really gain from it is success.

  • @davidmaster001
    @davidmaster001 10 лет назад +8

    This has really touched home to me. I was afraid, for a long time, to try new things, all because of fear of rejection. I started a project here on RUclips earlier this year because I finally overcame that fear to take the first step. Your encouragement to be myself and to push forward is just what I need at the moment. Thanks.

  • @sillyliving_offgrid
    @sillyliving_offgrid 10 лет назад +6

    "Harsh critics are jerks...they see something remarkable in you..." - I could quote several inspiring things you've stated, but I will make this short. You are an amazing, inspirational being, and I thank you for being you, my friend!

  • @wandilemaya4653
    @wandilemaya4653 8 лет назад +3

    I went through rejection numerous times in my life and very key 🔑 to me is what you Mr Brendon say about it. shifting the focus, minding the most important things in your life and never look back or ponder about hatters and their stinking sentiments.

    • @rades920
      @rades920 8 лет назад

      how do u shift ur thinking from haters and to the actual goal??

  • @halezng
    @halezng 9 лет назад +51

    I am addicted to your videos. And what a great addiction. So motivating!

    • @Ghost-fe1vp
      @Ghost-fe1vp 8 лет назад +1

      +Haley Graves What rejection are you afraid of?

  • @danny.fortes
    @danny.fortes 10 лет назад +7

    Wow "Go & be *GREAT* & *Never* apologize for it!" I love watching Brendon Burchard's videos.

  • @alexanderelkorek
    @alexanderelkorek 9 лет назад +224

    This guy doesn't get it. Deep fear of and feelings of rejection come from experiences during the formative years of one's development. These fears and feelings can be overcome but it must be done through the reprogramming of the subconscious being.

    • @vanyastaleva415
      @vanyastaleva415 9 лет назад +23

      Absolutely. This shit doesn't work. He says not to fear of rejection because so many people are not bad to you, but what if your own parents rejected, shamed or treated you badly while you grow up. Should someone has the right to fear, then?! The first people in your life didn't accept you, didn't give you respect. It's very hard to believe that other people would. And this comes from the unconscious level. This man is not a psychotherapist! So people don't buy his crap, please!!! There are so many like him. He found a niche of making money. That's it! He is just trying to get popular trough total bullshits making fun of people that need qualified help. Paul McKenna is just as bad as this guy. He made millions of dollars by selling books with similar crap! So please people open your eyes! Psychological work must be made with the help of therapist or at least with a book written by therapist. And that therapist should not be Paul McKenna. I've tried his stupid books. They don't do anything at all. They only have this huge blown like huge babbles titles to make you buy it! Real stuff doesn't need this ridiculous titles!!! Like "Change your life in 7 days". WTH, does anybody believe that?! That life can be changed in 7 days?

    • @Musicdudeyoutub
      @Musicdudeyoutub 9 лет назад +12

      Vanya Staleva You're projecting your negativity onto people that you put too much faith in. I've heard way too many stories about misdiagnosis of mental disorders by qualified psychiatrists to put any faith in them. These educated fools can guess, but your unconscious/subconscious mind is more accessible to yourself than to them. You can learn a lot on the "personality disorders" page on wikipedia. It's surprisingly more informative than many other online psychology resources. I wish you well.

    • @JoMama123451234
      @JoMama123451234 9 лет назад +29

      Vanya Staleva You clearly don't understand the difference between life coach and therapist. You sound like you have some deep seeded issues from the past that need to be resolved. That's the job of a therapist. The job of a life coach is to help you achieve your goals and reach your potential. One could say that a therapist has more of a focus on the past while a life coach has more of a focus on the future. A life coach's job isn't necessarily to treat psychological disorders. So you need to see a therapist because you sound like you have an attachment or abandonment issue

    • @vanyastaleva415
      @vanyastaleva415 9 лет назад

      JoMama123451234 I think you don't know what you are talking about, hahahah

    • @vanyastaleva415
      @vanyastaleva415 9 лет назад

      JoMama123451234 "life coach" is someone who is making money by selling you nothing. This is the difference between psychologist and "life coach". It's a made up title.

  • @burritomaster6587
    @burritomaster6587 9 лет назад +2

    Go out and be great and never apologize for it. Love that

  • @umamaheswari5700
    @umamaheswari5700 10 лет назад +1

    I believe your raw speech is a wake up call for many people out there. Yes rejection is a fear. Although it is difficult to overcome, i believe it can be overcome if you ask yourself the right questions repeatedly everyday. Your fear attacks everyday. Then fight it everyday. Everything, or mostly everything can be overcome with practice. Thank You Brendon.

  • @Ananian77
    @Ananian77 8 лет назад +4

    First time watcher here: I red about the fear of rejection on the Third Circle Theory book but could not exactly understand the odds and the math behind it plus the haters who critize you. Now I fully understand it, thank you so much for doing this Brendon, instantly subscribed.

  • @yanastamova982
    @yanastamova982 9 лет назад +7

    You got me in tears! I have been in this big hole for weeks and this video made so many emotions explode inside of me... I dont know how to describe how i am feeling... I personally thank you for being such an inspiration!
    Lots of love from London :') xx

  • @neripongos
    @neripongos 6 лет назад +3

    Hi Brendon, Thank you for this. I actually got rejected today from a job interview and I felt like the world is going to end already. It was a job that I really love the most.

  • @Ana-rb7ws
    @Ana-rb7ws 2 года назад +1

    As another commenter mentioned, fear of rejection originates from the subconscious mind, therefore it needs to be healed at the level of the subconscious mind. Getting facts and data, as Brendon provides in this video, appeals to the conscious, logical mind. Emotional issues need emotional healing.

  • @TheAdamlans
    @TheAdamlans 9 лет назад +29

    I understand your point, and what your saying has great merit. I do have a few qualms with the video which I want to bring up. My biggest issue with the video is that it is too focused on the solution, and less so on understanding and empathy which genuinely heal (both from your guidance perspective, and the self-perspective of the viewers). I can see that you're trying to help, and not be insensitive, but when you suggest that fear of rejection shows that people live "unexamined lives," it can really hurt people's feelings, because it shames those who experience this. This is partly because those who experience fear of rejection tend to "over-examine," and tend to feel a discrepancy between how much they understand compared to how frightened they feel. I understand you were using this to segway some of your facts about the numbers and percentages... but if your goal is to guide those who experience this, you can begin by being more considerate with these moments in the video! As for my own two cents, my alternative advice to your video is that those who experience fear of rejection can begin to give themselves permission to fear rejection. It is the bodies natural response to a perceived threat learned from past experience, so it makes sense that it will arise. Try to empathize with this aspect of your body. This is the way of vulnerability, and looks at the fear right in the eye.

    • @orsygodri1155
      @orsygodri1155 5 лет назад +1

      100% agree with what you said. Also... much better advice than this 9 minute nonsense.

    • @Karen-tk6xi
      @Karen-tk6xi 3 года назад +1

      I think it was empowering. What he meant was to hold yourself to a higher standard. It's a balancing narrative.

    • @im.natmel
      @im.natmel 2 года назад

      Agree. This can really make people feel worse than when they start watching this video. It's like he's just trying to convince us about how dumb we are for fearing rejection, without any empathy at all.

  • @firasalsaidi77
    @firasalsaidi77 10 лет назад +3

    Brendon, you are such an inspirational person, I never committed to listen to one person's speech. but the way you speak and the logic you add to it makes it real and from the heart. God Bless you. and thanks for your care for others to be better

  • @DamonCart
    @DamonCart 5 лет назад +8

    He's right about everything he's saying, but it's very logical and fear of rejection is completely illogical and irrational. When helping people with this you have to go to where they are first. Logic usually won't solve this problem.

  • @DaveWhitmore421
    @DaveWhitmore421 10 лет назад +9

    This is one of the most thought provoking and inspirational videos I've ever seen!

  • @morningglory3644
    @morningglory3644 10 лет назад +2

    We all have a fear of rejection. I think we are conditioned to feel the need to be accepted and approved by our society. This fear is not something we are born with, it is taught. It is the shame of rejection that burns in our memories. The shame hinders us because we don't want to feel it again, so we are often reluctant to take risks. I recognize that rejection is part of life, but we don't have to reject ourselves. Instead, we can empower ourselves and rise above that fear. The people who matter will support you and the people who shouldn't matter should be left in the past.

  • @uthramanoj6051
    @uthramanoj6051 5 лет назад +1

    Thank you friend, I have lived exactly like this for the past 30 years despite all my achievements and evolution. This is exactly what I needed to get a grip!! This is such a deep subconscious emotion that limits every action of yours!

  • @olgakucharska3836
    @olgakucharska3836 4 года назад +2

    Hey Brendon, I've been rejected by at least 120 people and that is a major part of who I ve met in my whole life. And I mean it were rejections that have shaped my life. I've been rejected even by my family. So please don't tell me that it's a rare thing. Cuz it hurts my life. And I feel I cannot make any friends except for 3 or 4 people that are amazing.

  • @kimberlyholroyd4053
    @kimberlyholroyd4053 4 года назад

    Brendon is "My Reason" for more than I can write, struggling with depression, anxiety disorder and Lyme Disease that is progressive forcing me to work from home due to its debilating nature
    THANK YOU will always fall short of the breath of fresh air that he has been to my life....
    where there was once so much uncertainty 😇

  • @robertpresler1425
    @robertpresler1425 9 лет назад +1

    Thank you honestly. I have had a lot of fears in my life and I have been watching your segments and it has opened up a whole new world that I'm going to embrace.

  • @VikitoSt
    @VikitoSt 10 лет назад +3

    I agree with you that the math says - don't be scared cause the people who are nice to you are more that the people who have been rude, but that's the conscious level. Actually the fear of rejection comes from the unconscious level of someones mind. And this is the psychology of human. Fear at all have a practical meaning, so I don't feel you should be so hard on people who are at a certain age but still have the fear of rejection. This is one of those things that one have to work for it to overcome it. It's not just going to dissapear because you make them feel ashamed of that they still have the fear. So what do you expect - they will magically say - "oh, how unreasonable was I to have those feelings, I should emediatly change"?! One of the most important principle of dealing with problems is admiting the problem and accept it and feel ok about it, NOT ASHAMED. Only after that, you can be calm about it and act practically. Here you say - how unacceptable the fear of rejection is, how ridicilous. Stop saying to people how wrong they are. You are not psychologist! I think you are just good presenter, but you have no good case, it's just presentation. Make your research about this thing!

    • @VikitoSt
      @VikitoSt 10 лет назад +1

      Plus you do what you do, not to help people but to make them excited about your crap, so they buy it and you get richer! That's the oldest trick in advertising - "excite to buy"! There are a lot of you out there and people buy your crap because they have no reall knowlege of their own psychology. What people need is a real psychoanalising and exercises that are created by good, real psychologist, not your crap!

  • @rubidirrojnamcha8470
    @rubidirrojnamcha8470 4 года назад +1

    Your optimism is rare in the narcissistic world. Feeling good!!!!

  • @Lolligag
    @Lolligag 4 года назад +1

    I love this message and your spirit. It’s expert advice for anyone who spends their life worrying about being liked, seeking approval and fearing not being liked. Thank you for opening our eyes.

  • @karolinavarga6872
    @karolinavarga6872 9 лет назад +1

    This is great focus on dealing with those that in life that do not impact us tremendously. However rejection by those closest to us have a much deeper and significant influence, such as a parent, a friend, a partner.

  • @hesham0000100
    @hesham0000100 9 лет назад +9

    I think I just fell in love with ur channel. GREAT WORK !!

  • @ethiem4735
    @ethiem4735 3 года назад

    Thank you Sir.
    I have been suffering from chronic fear of rejection and that has made me to dim my light. No more .

  • @mritunjaysingh1801
    @mritunjaysingh1801 9 лет назад +2

    this video opened a new door in my life...in one word..it was AWESOME

  • @MsGeorgeEmad
    @MsGeorgeEmad 7 лет назад +2

    go out and be great and never apologize for that

  • @Sebastiaan75
    @Sebastiaan75 9 лет назад

    I notice when I realize I AM the person I am and I do what I LOVE, that which I AM passionate about... That which I am and that which I love is factual, there is no choice... as soon as I totally accept and value this actuality that cannot be changed by me, I'm not sensitive to rejection anymore. You only feel hurt due to rejection because it resonates with your own rejection towards yourself. Seeing and relaxing with the factuality of who you are and what you do makes rejection something about them, not about you.
    Thanks Brendon, I love your talks!

  • @ashestoashes5267
    @ashestoashes5267 8 лет назад +8

    Unfortunately a lot of the people who disliked this video are the ones who have all their focus on the negative and on fear. Honestly, if you get offended by his good intentions that is your own fault. This whole channel is meant too better yourself and do good, why would he be trying to personally put any of you down? Good god. Go look on the mirror and love yourself for Petes sake.

    • @sohaibahmed226
      @sohaibahmed226 8 лет назад +1

      +Ashes To Ashes Very well said!

    • @baconlatte
      @baconlatte 8 лет назад

      +Ashes To Ashes I disliked the video, because I think it is dismissive, superficial, and minimizes the very real pain that rejection causes some people. It's also the cheapest of pop psychology and self-help gibberish. It's frightening how easily people are influenced.

    • @jgc1077
      @jgc1077 5 лет назад

      I'm not offended by his good intentions. I'm offended by his stupidity.

  • @goodrichguibelondo
    @goodrichguibelondo 10 лет назад +1

    i love you brendon you uplift my confidence not to consumed by rejection....i am lesbian ..and because of it i was suffreing rejection,humialtion ,descrimination for many times...but now you gave me idea how to use my weakest point to be more self determined and more positive in every aspect of my life..thank you...i watched all your teachings and it touched my life so much..i love you...help me to be one of your project soon...

  • @mikkame77
    @mikkame77 10 лет назад

    That was a blessing. Instead of pity, however, send a positive prayer to each of those people. If they truly want the best for you, a prayer or "good vibes" can only produce a poet fun feeling in the giver and recipient.

  • @TeeboM1
    @TeeboM1 10 лет назад +1

    Oh my! You touch on the very core aspects that either drive a person or hold a person back. It all boils down to choice, what kind of person do I want to be fearful or brave ...Two thumbs up to you sir!! Oh I Love your shirts.

  • @JCobesV2
    @JCobesV2 10 лет назад

    Thank you Brendan, you share amazing advice that has truly helped me through some rough patches in life. This message rang personally clear for me. I've always had a large imagination and big dreams but feared to share it out of rejection. I've been learning tons on the idea of loving oneself before you can profoundly love others. Rejection was something that always held me back but beginning to allow myself ultimate manifestation of oneself. I've faced enough rejection in life for being optimistic, loving, gentle and it usually comes from the other side of the spectrum; the pessimists. I'm about to embark into the Game Industry and expect tons of no's before I hear the first yes and someone takes a chance on a man of character. No need to write a life doctrine but wanted to say thank you for all your uploads, they have all been impactful and uplifting during these times of struggle. Shirt rocks too! Have no fear, for not all of us our shallow minded :)

  • @AdelleRamcharan
    @AdelleRamcharan 10 лет назад +35

    I loved this and needed it right about now. Thank you so much Brendon! You have a gift :)

    • @pso28
      @pso28 7 лет назад

      Same! Brandon is so amazing! :) I needed this too!

  • @saeligutierrez8025
    @saeligutierrez8025 8 лет назад +1

    Dear Brendon,
    I want to say thanks for helping me develop my skills.

  • @SafetyBriefer
    @SafetyBriefer 9 лет назад +29

    I like the shirt.

  • @shanicollins3557
    @shanicollins3557 10 лет назад

    This was by far the most inspirational thing I've listened to, and after coming home from a horrible day at school this opened my eyes! I'm so grateful that I watched this!

  • @AffaanMansoori
    @AffaanMansoori 10 лет назад +9

    Go out be Great and Never Apologize For it .. --Super Like!

  • @LiYuan2131
    @LiYuan2131 9 лет назад +3

    The best way of not feeling scared of rejected by others is by having extra self confidence and have an expectations that not everyone will accept your point of view or sales pitch. Period

  • @jondeathklok1029
    @jondeathklok1029 9 лет назад +1

    hey Brendon, i really like how you explained this video, you definitely helped me and im going to share this link with others who are really having a hard time with rejection, true words of wisdom man

  • @Leggs013
    @Leggs013 2 года назад +2

    I'm 54 years old. Male, Learning about Fear of Rejection now.

  • @Viraltnteam
    @Viraltnteam 9 лет назад +3

    Go out and be great and never apologize for it. Love this. Amazing stuff as always Brendon. What I want to know those is what people are doing today to make themselves great? What are they doing to fill in the gaps of the needs in the world?

  • @vijaypawar8081
    @vijaypawar8081 8 лет назад

    Brendon your motivational videos are stunning and contains a lot of morale!
    I am really awestruck by your panache and Witt!
    people like you are unique and are extremely rare!
    We will always support you!

  • @PianoSingaBoi
    @PianoSingaBoi 9 лет назад +1

    This is great :) It really puts things into perspective when you consider the numbers of critics compared to supporters. Also, the 4 reasons why people are being critical is on point. Thank you!

  • @alkolic1166
    @alkolic1166 8 лет назад +4

    I like how you are trying to bring numbers and pragmatic facts to prove your thoughts. But the fact about rejection, the most unfortunate I'd say, is that it is not a question of words or explicit criticisms but it is instead more related to body language. And this is a lot more common. The question you should have asked is not "have you ever heard someone tell you bad things ?" but "have you ever felt rejected ?".

  • @stephlu9684
    @stephlu9684 10 лет назад

    amazing, thank you !
    some people are critical because they aren't open minded and they don't try to understand your values and your reasons to do things or where you come from, like Brendon say it's ignorance. Some people are harsh because they believe it will bring you motivation to become better, but they might miss the point. so you can be a teacher to them and tell the how and what really is a motivator for you.

  • @RaffaellaIT
    @RaffaellaIT 10 лет назад +2

    Yes, I am an adult and fear rejection from my prospects and clients(only). I do not care much about other kind of rejection.... Why? Because it happens constantly in sales, days in days out, and I never get used to it.

  • @jemimahshekinah-shalom9758
    @jemimahshekinah-shalom9758 8 лет назад +11

    Sorry, I don't find this helpful at all. Fear of rejection is not superficial as described or purported, but something deep. It may stem from childhood, school, family background, relationships and may project in to careers, friendship etc. I find this video dismissive. Fear of reject doesn't come from thin air. I find the statistics or ratios irrelevant, in this context, substance is more important number counting.

    • @milobar100
      @milobar100 5 лет назад +1

      Well, fear rejection if it makes you happy.

    • @jgc1077
      @jgc1077 5 лет назад

      You're right. He sucks.

  • @harleyquinn9391
    @harleyquinn9391 Год назад +2

    In my experience at age 33 rejection has not gotten any easier in the last 23 years I still feel like that 10 year old child and I feel I experience at least perceived rejection on an almost daily basis. Listening to this has added to my shame and humiliation that I’m still not over this like I apparently should be long past It’s the perceived judgement and prolonged anguish that always prevents me from truly following through on getting real help I always think it’s too hard and too late

    • @kahleenriojas2684
      @kahleenriojas2684 11 месяцев назад

      Yeah, he didn't do a great job of being mindful of how his message could come off to those struggling with shame. I hear you, your opinion is valid, and on top of that, I agree with your opinion that this misses the mark. I get the impression that his enthusiasm is a hammer that he uses a lot to get things done, but this topic is sensitive and requires some more finesse, especially for the people who need the most help understanding it. Let's team up and reject the parts of the message we don't like together! ❤

  • @ieguy3
    @ieguy3 10 лет назад

    I'm sending this to my business associates -- and also to a few friends and family. This is something I learned a long time ago -- but it's always great to hear it again - and, frankly, I just happen to love the way you present things.

  • @adamdrys7672
    @adamdrys7672 Год назад

    You've just did something very good to someone very far away. I wish you all the best!

  • @exceedingyoureverest184
    @exceedingyoureverest184 8 лет назад

    I always love watching Brendon's video's and assigning them to my
    clients. While at the High Performance Academy Brendon gave the
    challenge to do videos once a week if videos were our goal. Slowly but
    surely getting there.
    My videos aren't quite to his level yet but if anyone would like to
    watch them and give suggestions that would be AMAZING, always looking to
    improve.

  • @deborahbowman1920
    @deborahbowman1920 8 лет назад +7

    Maybe people only get rejected an average of 5-7 people because after rejection they are unwilling to risk it again. And or it takes a long time to recover

  • @Auroraflair
    @Auroraflair 10 лет назад

    Just as I was listening to this I though it would be great for kids who are bullied (and then noticed your message about that below) and not just kids, some bullies don't grow up and we find them in our work place or elsewhere. Really just negative people in general. I've been thinking this for some time but never had it put together. Hearing you explain it helps a lot more then my own mind that has just been kind of a jumbled mess. Sometimes I think its harder to listen to yourself then it is hearing it from someone else. Thank you!

  • @nikism360
    @nikism360 10 лет назад +1

    Thank you Brendon. You never fail my expectations of your message.

  • @david-rc2qh
    @david-rc2qh 9 месяцев назад

    Ahhh….I LOVE this! Stop listening to the jerks! We have a crowd of people who accept us just the way we are. 🙌

  • @tzefiraf.3318
    @tzefiraf.3318 9 лет назад +1

    I am a new fan. Thank you and God bless!

  • @NChic
    @NChic 5 лет назад

    Goosebumps! Thank you Brendon for doing this kind of videos! You help so many people to get on the right track! Thank you RUclips! So thankful to have access to all this!

  • @AzraelPercussionNEO
    @AzraelPercussionNEO 10 лет назад

    Now isn't saying that your shirt is ugly is a form of rejection. Not being negative just real. Good points on reasons for other people rejecting you especially the "self-booasting" part.

  • @sagarpawar4388
    @sagarpawar4388 7 лет назад

    what a great message Brendon!!
    Very few times do motivational speakers are someone's idol... but in your case, you yourself are my role model !!

  • @PortoBelo511
    @PortoBelo511 8 лет назад

    Here it is an ordinary subject that makes controversy. Why? The answer is simple. Before the answer came the question? Are you a child or an adult?
    Brilliant Brandon! I we are adults here. We may talk about insecurities. Anyone that not adds value to our own personal growth we have to ignore them.
    I love the saying on the end of the video. “Go on and be great and never apologize for that.”

  • @devinhinkson3798
    @devinhinkson3798 5 лет назад

    One thing I’ve learned in life is that what people do shows who THEY are not who YOU are. I used to be bullied from 3rd to 10th grade and that hurt deeply. I felt deeply rejected and felt like I was bullied because I was unloveable or flawed. I have healed from that and ironically I have done door to door sales for 7 years. Face to face rejection happens everyday in this job from more people than any other job-period. But you know what I’ve learned? The people who try and hurt you do so because THEY are hurting. Understanding that has set me free and given me the confidence to be professional and respectful despite constant rejection. It’s not about a small percentage of people rejecting you, it’s about knowing who you are and being that regardless of what other people decide to do. Tell yourself that you love rejection because it makes you stronger and gets you closer to success. It’s a necessary price to pay for success.

  • @MartinezGardenia
    @MartinezGardenia 8 лет назад

    In addition, imagine what would have happened if the world's most influential people(Dr.King, Ghandi, Cesar Chavez, etc) kept their mouth shut because of what others thought or because they were afraid of rejection? they wouldn't have been the great people they were and they wouldn't have made change. I really needed to hear this. thank you so much!

  • @lynn_larkin
    @lynn_larkin 10 лет назад +1

    I truly believe people find fault in you because being you and living your life to the full can shine a light on the lack of faith they have in themselves. Having the confidence and courage to attack what you want from life somehow frightens them and it can make them feel less then :( It's sad but if they can't get on board with your amazing fun filled life adventure then they get left behind. "It's their life lesson, not yours!" Xx

  • @kenlezzy
    @kenlezzy 9 лет назад +1

    Thank you so much brother.
    You took the words right out of my mouth and articulated what my heart and soul has been wanting to say !
    Keep up the Awesomeness !
    God Bless & Best Regards
    Kenneth

  • @DorothyKilonzo
    @DorothyKilonzo 10 лет назад

    Brendon, I have subscribed to your videos which I am finding useful in my life as an affiliate for an online company here in Kenya.Thanks for making these videos free and at an appropriate length.

  • @Theshadowgamer001
    @Theshadowgamer001 10 лет назад

    Keep on preaching man cause I think everyone should live their life how they want to not on someone else's dream or based on what someone else thinks

  •  10 лет назад

    Thank you so much for you sharing, Brendon. I'm about to share some of my ideas with the world and you have just supported me. I love you, man...

  • @godsdivinepurposeforliving352
    @godsdivinepurposeforliving352 6 лет назад +2

    Hello! Good video. I like some of the points you shared. Some people may have experienced severe rejection in their early years, such as being rejected by parents, being abused by someone they trusted , etc. Which is much more difficult to get over and yes people do carry those burden into adulthood (Including myself) which is why a lot of us are seeking help by watching videos such as yours. I'd like to make a point by stating that we can't put our perceptions of what SHOULD be on everyone because it's not EVER reality. I did get a little offended by the way you opened this video, and I'm sure others may feel the same way because although it wasn't your intention, you were insensitive.

  • @freakoffer
    @freakoffer 10 лет назад

    After listening to Brendon Burchard I had several RUclipsrs come to mind, and this video message should be shared with all famous RUclipsrs... The fear of rejection is pretty bad for most communities within those Channels and TotalBiscuit is a great example who legitmately does not like most of his fanbase as their mostly jerks... Which understandably so to critize them, Brendon thanks for the words mate!

  • @keyl2528
    @keyl2528 22 часа назад

    My family criticized me continuously for many years. Its not that there are few people who criticize you. It's the fact that they do it for so long. And the fact that families are supposed to support your every step but they don't. House without good foundation may stay still for some time but then collapse because of some wind. This is what I go through daily.

  • @merlinsandra4405
    @merlinsandra4405 3 года назад

    "God will bless those who are rejected right in front of people who rejected!" All success stories have 1000s of rejection... Still they didn't loose hope n moved on..... Moving on and trying is quintessential in life but one needs God to support, to wipe tears n encourage as well...!! Be positive ... Somewhere your dreams are fructifying for a better n higher self but it is invisible right now!!

  • @yomomshouse100
    @yomomshouse100 9 лет назад +1

    Don't need to overcome. Just deal with it a see what happen. Pain is necessary

  • @bechi5784
    @bechi5784 4 года назад

    ‘Go out and be great and never apologise for it’. Yup

  • @pharaohsamia
    @pharaohsamia 8 лет назад +1

    sometimes when you get rejects from beloved people it hurts a lot,and you lose self esteem .But Thanks to your video ,it motivated me on to be what I am and be confident about it ,it was such an emotional video .But thumpsUp!

    • @sohaibahmed226
      @sohaibahmed226 8 лет назад

      +Samia Mohamed I know how you feel it does hurt

  • @robking9857
    @robking9857 10 месяцев назад

    I love this. It took my second time watching it to really resonate. When I took the comparison exercise, I came up with a percentage based on 1,000 people of 0.005%! WOW, did that put things in perspective! And the pool of 1,000 is a tiny fraction of the people I have encountered in my lifetime both personally and professionally.
    Then, I qualified the 5 people who stuck out in my mind and none of them were happy people, and certainly not one of them would I go to for advice. And that is where I struck gold. None of the people who rejected me hold any value in my life now. And that is where I found my release.
    I am healthier, more successful, and happier than any of them. So much for their influence, right? So, allowing them to hold me back with any negative self-image is absurd.

  • @WhatARook
    @WhatARook 10 лет назад

    A friend of mine posted this on Facebook, and I think it is great. At the risk of sounding like a critic though, I would just touch on one minor point by saying, don't waste time on pity. Pity adds nothing to your life. It is just a distraction that forces you to dwell on the negative. Offer something constructive or let it go. Some people are dogged in there ignorance, so let them have their choice and their burden. Easier said than done, I know.

  • @SoniaFreers
    @SoniaFreers 10 лет назад +1

    This right here - this is why I admire and share everything you say Brendon. Thank you for providing this video for me to share :)

  • @rhezzz
    @rhezzz 8 лет назад

    "go out and be great and never apologize for it" - Brendon Burchard

  • @justinecohen547
    @justinecohen547 9 лет назад +1

    Brendon you are truly inspiring!! You make me feel so positive that I giggle!!

  • @namktqs
    @namktqs 10 лет назад

    Thank you, we should keep be ourselves, do things with our best to help other people or trust with ourselves and ignore someone who don't appreciate our.

  • @emmabrooker166
    @emmabrooker166 8 лет назад +4

    "The tragic minority" 😂
    Thanks for this video, it helped me shift perspective.

  • @TheWellnessHour
    @TheWellnessHour 10 лет назад +1

    Great info!

  • @lizcrittenden8846
    @lizcrittenden8846 8 лет назад

    I totally agree with what you've said and my mother is the only one who is ever critical of me and what I'm doing
    and I've thought it was because she was afraid of me being successful.

  • @ronaldessi
    @ronaldessi 9 лет назад

    Yeah the last parts really hit me, and you know what, he's right. Just need to go out there and do our stuff and ignore the em that'll have something to say about it. You earned a subscriber buddy. Thx.

  • @milobar100
    @milobar100 5 лет назад

    I was rejected by my parents. Seriously. First my mother rejected me and then my father rejected me right after hurting me deeply. My fear of rejection was huge, it was overwhelming, it was great. I worked on it soooooo hard. I purposefully got myself into situations which could mean rejection for me. After a few years and a few rejections I stopped being fearful. I just stopped. Now it is not an issue any more. Now it does not scare me. Any character weaknesses can be changed if we work on them.

  • @AdrianaCasanova1
    @AdrianaCasanova1 10 лет назад

    Hi Brandon, I really enjoyed this video.
    Don't limit the expression of who you are and what you can give to the world because of what people may think of you...LOVE IT !

  • @nikolaidimitrov1556
    @nikolaidimitrov1556 4 года назад

    The truth has been spoken! Thank you sir!

  • @BurgundyandBlue1111
    @BurgundyandBlue1111 10 лет назад

    Brendon, this was awesome (brought tears to my eyes). I know people who are soooo stuck on what others think that they are afraid to do what they really want to do and it makes me sad for them. If they lived the way you encourage, their lives would be so much richer, fuller and a more complete reflection of their truth. You are brilliant (I know my opinion does not matter, but I had to share it). ;) Thank you for posting this!

  • @LisaRothstein
    @LisaRothstein 10 лет назад

    Thank you Brendon -- To paraphrase half the action movies of the 80s and 90s... I AM too old for this sh*t!! :-) Critics are to be ignored or pitied -- LOVE IT!