@@LovedLambagreed, it makes more sense when you consider that modern society almost looks down upon people exercising self control while the defining feature of the Amish to most outsiders is voluntarily not adopting technology even if it would make things easier.... as in self control.
Interesting that bundling means something different in this context. In the colonial era of the US, a man courting a woman at her parents house would share her bed (to get to know her and because maybe he lives far away and needs to stay over). However, they were physically separated by a piece of wood called a "bundling board", or he was bundled by being sewn into a bag. It was considered a good sign if they could stay up all night talking, but there was to be NO touching.
@@Phoenix-zy1cx Yeah I also read something slightly different, that bundling is where they lay in bed together and spend the night talking or whatever but no touching. However it's entirely possible that Lizzie's community did it this way whereas others do it differently and I think some Amish communities don't do it at all. There is a lot of variations in rules for many Amish communities. ~:~
I know everyone is skeeved out by the sketchy four guys coming to your house in the middle of the night. Fair! But I’m just imagining how much NOISE this would cause. Guys going in and out, up and down the stairs? Going into the kitchen etc? I’m a light sleeper so this would be keeping me awake! What is the rest of the household doing while all this pitter patter is going on? Amish houses aren’t huge, I have to imagine the parents and all the siblings can hear all this going on. You’d have no privacy. I’d be pissed not just randos being in my house but at the comings and goings causing so much noise! Not to mention the talking, walking etc! I’d tell everyone to go out and party in the barn or whatever other buildings Amish people have on their property.
Maybe that's also a precaution measure, so that the actual intercourse does not happen because there are other 10-19 family members behind the walls most likely hearing the activity. They are not seen together but clearly heard of what they do together. However, hard time for parents for sure
@@kateryna_polovyk Do Amish siblings also share bedrooms? I’m assuming it’s broken down by gender so 3 brothers in one bedroom, 3 sisters in one bedroom etc. Do the sisters sharing the bedroom with the sister being wooed also have to witness all this awkward Amish dating in their bedroom? Also witnessing the lying down together and cuddling? Luckily it’s only every 2 weeks and I guess you can be more open once you are officially dating so this part doesn’t last too long. I have so many questions 😂
Yes, but considering this is their way of life, I’m sure you’d get used to it because it would just be normal. I’m sure they have their own way of doing things as to know not to be loud in the middle of the night. The thing I’d be more mad about is lack of privacy.
It’s very high in this culture because nobody talks about it and it’s always the women shamed for “allowing” it. That is if they even say anything. There’s a reason those women who escape rarely go back.
I’ll be honest, I thought the same at first too. But also imagine you have these guys in your room but also you share a room with 1-3 sisters, you have a few brothers in another room, a dad, maybe an uncle or grandfather as well. If you said no then it’s a no. And if you’re hanging out as a group and your sisters are there too and they don’t like a guys vibe then you’re in charge enough that the girls have the home court advantage. It’s not done sneakily. It’s done to keep the girls safe and home. It’s probably safer than 90% of the dates I went on as a young girl. I graduated in 2005 so I was leaving home with no GPS, no cell phone… just some printed out Mapquest directions, a handful of quarters and a “good luck!” Lol. I don’t see it as so terrible. There’s a lot of really shitty Amish culture but this one doesn’t seem as bad as it does at face value.
@@SwedePotato314 But why MIDNIGHT??? Come by after sunset or something. Not MIDNIGHT. When you're SLEEPING. I would have always said "no, frick off, I'm sleeping".
@@16poetisa lmao no I totally agree. I love my sleep I’d never date if I had to do it at that time. I can’t be up late like that for some boy and his friends no thank you haha imagine the parents too they must be exhausted lol
@@georgeelder8415 That’s very wishful thinking. In closed communities like this, because people know eachother they’re MORE likely to get away with really awful stuff. A lot of people don’t hold each other accountable because it’s the norm. I’ve heard countless horror stories about women who escaped these exact types of communities. Sexual assault statistics are really high in these types of communities
@@CrystalRose1111 Hey, that sounds very likely, as lots of closed cultures do protect their own... If I was her daddy, it wouldn't go well for him/them... I would want to meet the man first, if that's a thing in that culture...
@@georgeelder8415typically in a closed community where traditional gender roles are thought to be demanded by God, the girl will be blamed. Because those are good boys, right? She must have led them on, let it go too far, and now she wants it to look like it wasn’t all her fault to begin with. This still happens in regular communities, in one like this, the boys are rarely to blame. What usually winds up happening is they get married, especially if the rape results in pregnancy, to ensure the woman makes it right.
Wow...if I woke up in tge middle of the night to see 3 boys around my age (of I was a teen or younger adult), my brain would immediately ho into "intruder, danger mode". Especially not having been given any information regarding this ritual. That just seems so intrusive to me.
I've often wondered how the different rules/traditions came about, especially for how your former sect dated. Those are some pretty out-there dating traditions for a socially conservative religious group. It's always interesting to listen to you talk about your life growing up. I grew up in rural York county PA back in the 70's/early 80's, which was close to the Amish and Mennonite communities in both York and Lancaster counties. We would pass by the farms and the buggies on the road pretty regularly, and visit the farm stands/stores during summer/fall, plus the restaurants featuring 'Amish' food. It got very commercialized over time and many moved away, especially those who still wanted to farm, since the area was getting built up with subdivisions.
Living around an Amish area, one time my wife came across a buggy late at night that was tilted badly to one side. She thought they had broken a spring or something. No, that wasn't what was going on......
@@Chinelolamb right! Finding Amish teenagers bumping belly's away from their Amish elders is totally not amusing. I forgot we now live in a woke world for a second. [deep sigh]
@@Chinelolamb What are you on about,? where in @kibashisiyoto6771 's comment does it say assault...seriously WTAF is wrong with you? How does buggy funtime translate to assault. The original video mentions nothing of assault, the comment mentions nothing of assault where did ONLY YOU get that? The video is about dating, relationships and alleged teenage Amish funtime!
Just when I thought the Asian vs Swiss dating is very different. *jaw drops* at this! 😱 Isn’t it dangerous so have soooo many guys with a girl even though sex is prohibited. I mean people do a lot of crazy things even when there are rules!
I think their community is too small for them to get away with doing bad things. Also she is not alone at home at age 16 she prolly lived with her parents.
@@LovedLamb most of SA in the world is caused by close relatives or spouses at home, not strangers in the park at night. So I don't think the fact that it's a small community is helping much here.
@@alicjakaminska5762 I do not believe that is entirely true, yes maybe with relatives, but I have seen studies claiming that majority of child sexual abuse is done by other children for example 13 year old raping 6 year old brother. I know people who tried to kill themselves because even during adulthood his brother kept sending him flirty messages to trigger him. It being a small community really is a problem tho, cuz they would sacrifice safety for peace.
Lizzie, I'm a Amish girl who is totally shocked with your story and glad you escaped from that, I did hear a few people mention that the swartentruber amish date in bed but i never believed that and I'm horrified. I'm thankful for my community and just so you know, we and all the surrounding communities i know of go out to youth groups, volleyball games, the parks, singings, even bowling and dinner to date someone... I'm sorry you never experienced that in your community!!! You're beautiful by the way🤗 God bless you!
If I were a parent I would be uncomfortable with dating happening late at night and my kid being alone with that many people without any supervision. I’d probably be constantly checking on them or stay near the door because in my mind, that would be the perfect scenario for some sick pervert to take advantage of someone. But that’s my opinion
@@ronblack7870 sometimes friends don’t always know when someone is sick mentally like that. I’m not saying his friends are wrong, I’m just saying as a parent you can’t be too careful. I would t not allow my kids to date when I have them one day, I just would make sure they understand that they have a right to say no and so do other people. And if someone of the opposite gender were in their room I’d stay near their room to make sure they were alright.
Oh my goodness. They come at midnight?! I don't think I can express how much that would scare me. And I would be cranky at being woken up lol. Also, who is supposed to supervise these 'bundling' sessions? What happens if the guy or girl just starts getting way too carried away?
😉 There is always something more than what you have known about to be weird/extreme before. But I am also happy you've also made it out of your cult/sect.
Seriously good question. She has eighteen siblings. For sure they didn't all have private rooms! I suppose, with luck and proper coordination, you could have a double date.
I recall a story of twins who both had their weddings on the same day and then also had their honeymoons on opposite sides of the same upstairs room that evening… (I believe these were Old Order Mennonites.)
I had heard of"Bundling" but never knew much about it 😳It sounds like the Schwartzentruber Amish Group that you came from have Very Different Dating practices than the Other Amish Groups. Thank You for Sharing your Life Experiences! May God Bless and Protect You Always! 🌹🌹🌹🌹🙏
So, when an Amish girl is about to reach her climax with a guy, I can hear her yell " Oh, Oh Jebediah plow my field". Or she could say to a man, " Oh please, don't stop, do it to me Johnny, do it to me buggy style".
There was a pretty similar practise in Switzerland and some parts of Germany and France in the 16-17th century (maybe earlier and later too but thats when it was written about most) called Kiltgang where basically if a young man was interested in a young woman he could spend the night in her bed (fully clothed ideally) and they got to know each other. Whether that included any kind of physical inimacy varied, but it doesnt seem to have been like prohibited. The people who seemed to have a problem with it were mostly moralists and priests, more than lay people
@@LaceyMyriah yeah, people need to know each other in an intimate way before they decide to spend the rest of their life together. They need to find out if they're sexually compatible. Having a great relationship with someone outside of sex is great and all, but it doesn't necessarily mean they are intimately compatible with each other. Sex is a very personal thing. And so you could have this great relationship with them in every respect EXCEPT for sex. And if you don't find that out _BEFORE_ you get married then you could end up screwed, pun intended. It could lead to a marriage that's full of mutual resentment and a dead bedroom. That's why the no sex before marriage rule actually harms the possibility of successful marriages. These hyper religious people hate the idea of divorce generally. But if they allowed a couple to have sex before marriage, then the percentage of marriages that last a lifetime and are happy and mutually loving and compatible in all respects, would greatly increase. If you only find out on the wedding night that you're sexually incompatible then what do you do? You either have to spend the rest of your life in a marriage of resentment and stress and anxiety, or get it quick divorce very early on into the marriage. That's what most fundamentalist Christians want, right? Successful marriages, and fewer divorces. Yet they shun the things that lead to more marriages being successful and lasting.
@@duffman18I agree with you that the no sex before marriage rule gets in the way of successful marriages, but most religious fundamentalists I know are too obsessed with the concept of virginity and marrying a virgin to let go of it
@@duffman18that sounds good on paper but i find it hard to believe that sexual compatibility will lead to significantly less divorce. 1) sure, it's nice to both want similar things, but let's just say this - even "OK" sex is pretty damn good, speaking from personal experience. a committed married couple can deal with 5/10 sex just fine as long as they both love each other and want the marriage to last. life isn't the red shoe diaries and sex is often boring. 2) people get bored all the time in marriages. how is sex exempt from this? i'm sure even 8/10 sex can get old if you hit the jackpot and marry a great match. there's always someone better, there's always someone more attractive, and you all too often meet these people when you're in a relationship. essentially, what will lead to less divorce is MORE GUARDRAILS AGAINST IT. make it socially and religiously difficult to divorce. have laws be inclined to discourage it. make stuff like alimony tough to get. yes, you'll have miserable married couples, but you also have miserable singles and miserable divorced. i think purposelessness and wanting unattainable things is what's causing these problems, not us being sexually unadventurous enough in the west. god knows THAT'S done enough damage.
@@duffman18just for context, i'm not religious but definitely would be as a way to give my life (and my wife & children) some structure & values. as society is a mess right now and religious subculture is almost just as bad, i'm just casually dating women and not planning on marriage or kids. it's a bad deal these days.
So, I was getting really nervous when you talked about FOUR dudes going to your house, but when you described them basically making themselves at home, which is noisy, I swttled down a bit. Then I got really nervous wwhen you mentioned this bundling thing, but then you mention that it's basically just cuddling. Well. Overall, that was pretty... cute, I guess? It is very odd, but regardless of how seemingly dangerous that was, it didn't turn out to be remotely as bad as I anticipated. I find it kinda funny how the vibes of the situation are like, "she let me touch her shoulder" 😂 And what with others mentioning that Amish families are just so big and that she's very likely to be in a room with several other sisters and the rest of the family behind thin walls calms me down a lot more about this. The only thing is that your parents are going to know how many boys you turned down and I can imagine that the pressure to marry would be high when they basically have a front row seat to your business :/
Several years ago me and a buddy were camping in Mid Ohio (Amish Country). It was well past midnight when we turned in for the night. As I'm laying there trying to fall asleep, I hear the clip clop of horse hooves over the low rumble of wagon wheels. I was bewildered as to why Amish would be out so late especially with church the next morning. Turns out it was a bunch of dudes trying to date Lizzie. It all makes perfect sense now.
This was interesting 😄 In a good way 😅 Edit: I'm not sure, if I should share this, but years ago happened so, that I spend a night with a man I liked, and we just talked and slept a bit. This happened few times, we would meet in a bar (small town, not that many bars), hang out, end up in same place for the night (most likely either one's home), it was really nice. Very sweet. Well, we never dated, but apparently it kinda reminds of amish dating 😅 Oops 😊
I read about bundling in an 1800s book by a woman who grew up Amish. I got the idea that the purpose was that the houses were cold in the winter. After the family had gone to bed, to save firewood they were not allowed to keep adding wood to the fire, so, to have these long talks, the young couple would bundle in the bed to keep warm. (They didn't mention rolling around as part of it.)
Wow… So without having any knowledge of this at the Time?? When I was 19/20 I totally “Bundled” with a girl before we started actually dating… very similar. No kissing. Literally just talked and I “kept her warm”. She must’ve felt secure … bc it happened again. Still no kissing. And we started dating after a few months of that happening. That was 2006. 4 kids later and we’ve been married for 12 years.
To think that happens with the blessing of parents blows my mind. A girl and a boy in the bedroom together for hours - unsupervised. Was there even a suggestion that might happen with my daughter, the boy would never darken my door again. And, I would have a serious man-to-boy talk with him, afterwhich he would never want to see me again. To my "english" mind, this tradition is lunacy.
I have two teenage daughters. Here in Germany, it is fine for teenage couples to have sleepovers. But I would strongly encourage them to get to know the guy by daylight first 😄
@@Psychiatricnerd I think it is important to remember that the Amish are really a cult. Like most cults, it's not surprising to discover sexual perversion as standard practice.
@@insulanerin7601letting your teenager have sleepovers with the opposite sex is the most idiotic and irresponsible parenting ever. And this is coming from a fellow European. Please don’t ever make that foolish mistake with your children. Your daughters deserve better parenting than that.
Funny enough this is similar to some ancient traditions in other cultures. The first to come to mind is in ancient Sparta, men would sneak out of the barracks to visit women at night (though usually for sex and we have no way of knowing how consenting the women were). I know a few other cultures did the “nighttime date” thing so as horrifying as it is, it’s also very interesting to see it around in modern day.
I suppose if a girl starts to get into mid to late 20s and is still single her family might start looking for a suitable guy, asking around if anyone knows anyone etc
If the prospects within the local Amish community aren't panning out, the parents will often send the dateable age youth off to different community for a while to stay with an uncle or to help out somebody and see if something develops that way.
This is WILD. My southern dad would NEVER allow a handful of teenage boys in my room at night. What in the world??? My mom wouldn’t allow handful teenage boys in her kitchen after it’s closed at night either. Bundling sounds a bit like dry humping to me but what do I know lol. I was only allowed to have a few boys in my room and it was regular hours and door had to be open! Thanks for sharing that was entertaining.
This sounds bizarre and frankly disgusting. You can't be seen together more than once every two weeks, you can't be seen together in the daytime, but his friends can come to your bedroom and pressure you to have an early hours fumble at 16. That's some creepy shit! People who love and respect each other, and want good relationships for the people they love, would want them to socialise with prospective partners a lot, openly, during the day, and without stupid restrictions.
Why can the couple only see each other at night. Most other cultures are being seen during the day proper. As an anthropologist who grew up around a lot of Amish, I’m extremely intrigued.
Probably something about looking proper. I'd imagine seeing a bunch of guys going somewhere, neighbors could never guess who is courting who. I also imagine that most households have multiple daughters. Which means the noisy neighbors really can't assume and gossip
I get how this works. It’s a weird system to test time apart, longer term(for teens) and physical intimacy without sex. I understand the principle behind it but gosh it sounds crazy.
That's horrifying a group of young men just come to your room while you're sleeping. I've been dating the same dude for 4 years and I still reflexively hit him when I'm not expecting him to be around me and he sneaks up on me and scares me.
Ok, I'm sorry but that description of of "bundling" was the most *Schrute family thing I've ever heard! *there's a show called "The Office" in which there is a character and his family that are supposedly based off of the Amish. However, everything about them and their traditions are scripted to be over the top and ridiculous. Basically unbelievable. Bundling sounds so fake and like "what the Hell? How did this even start? Why?!?!". Don't get me wrong, I absolutely believe you! I just was not at all expecting it 😶 *UPDATE* I showed my husband this video and he started bundling me 😂
this is wild. you said it’s not an arranged marriage but it sure sounds like arranged dating with all these men coming to your door asking if you would go out with their friend. then having those friends come over on your first date with the guy that’s interested. it’s pretty wild lol.
well it would be good to get the story from the guy's side. maybe the guy saw her in church and wanted to go on a date with her. i think the 3 other friends are there to make sure it's all on the level . he gets them to take him over there . i don't think it's the 3 guys arranging anything really.
How does that make it an arranged marriage? It's extremely common for groups of boys/girls of school age to go and tell someone that their friend likes them and try to convince them to go out. This happens all over the US. She said it herself that you can marry who you want and she was allowed to say no to the dates
The only advantage I can see here... if you can only see each other at night that means you're already tired/exhausted from the day and your social batteries are drained. That _could_ be great training for later into adult life when all you wanna do is go home to some peace and quiet... will this person match your energy level (or lack thereof)?
I'm surprised there was no chaperones, like in some conservative modern colonial societies, its nice that the couple was allowed time to just talk privately to each other ♡
It's a week later and haven't found a real answer to this. Based on the articles I read about Amish courtships, they mostly talk about bundling and wedding customs. Nothing I was able to find indicated Amish couples are forbidden to be seen together. But I'm going to guess that it has something to do with avoiding the appearance of sexual sin, being a good example, etc.
@@LoveKillFear777 I appreciate that you actually came back after doing the legwork, even if you didn't find a conclusive answer. Most people would just forget about it and move on.
@@LoveKillFear777Maybe the two weeks would be long enough to see if the "bundling" resulted in something...less than virtuous happened (ie long enough for pregnancy symptoms to show).
That's certainly different! My strict parents would have some very wide eyes after that one. Basically the opposite of how I was taught, minus the very poor sex ed.... (as in, at night only, several guys approaching to get permission or convince is a good sign, sharing a _bed_ , no mention of meeting the parents first, etc...
It's so telling that anything related to intimacy is "hidden" and not talked about. It makes me sad how many people must grow up fearing a part of themselves that's most natural.
another question: if dating can only happen when nobody else sees it- how do you know if you're the only one the guy is dating? is this knowledge shared otherwise or do you just hope for the best?
Between that story and watching your food get cold I don’t know what makes me more uncomfortable 😂😂😂 But truly interesting insight into a community / culture I know so little about
Very civilized indeed. "Look at this distinguished couple" I like how respectful both parties involved were. Maybe I should try Amish dating, if I can.
Wow, even if I did like men to begin with, I'd have a difficult time pretending to be enthusiastic about being woken up at midnight. Do you get kicked out if you don't date? Would I get kicked out for being ace?
This is the wildest thing I’ve ever heard! Keep your clothes on but lay in bed snuggling each other in your bed? I can’t believe they let y’all do that! I’m not Amish and I wouldn’t let my daughter have a boy in her room doing any of that day or night!😮
I’m confused. Have you met this guy ever before he comes with the other guys to ask to date you? Do you just have random guys coming to your house in the middle of the night? How does that even come about?!
Also, why not just use buttons? Buttons have been around for thousands of years, long before Jesus, so I can't imagine that they would be too "modern."
@@sarahmonte1069I’m not Amish, but my FIL drives Amish around (to like doctors apts and stuff) and he said that (at least for the Amish community where he lives), the button prohibition was made at a time where people were getting really fancy with their dress decor. Stuff like buttonholes and buttons could be (and were) elaborately embroidered or carved (iirc, buttons were also made out of mussel shell, too??) so the Amish decided to remove all potential for vanity and ban buttons altogether. For her community, though, idk.
Thanks for talking about this! I’m an ex Jehovah’s Witness and while we didn’t share a lot of similarities, when I tell people the dating culture they’re always shocked.
Can we please all stop using fascinating to describe this scenario. This situation is scary and intrusive. 99% women prefer their privacy especially at night, during bedtime. The fact that this is the only dating option offered is dangerous, offensive and wrong. Please stop saying this is fascinating. You don't understand what its like to be a woman put in uncomfortable situations. 💯
Wow. I was raised in a pretty strict church (not as strict as Amish) and this never would have been allowed. But I suppose there’s a lot of trust put in your innocence and following the rules.
I literally cannot wrap my head around what you just told us.
It’s literally a nightmare!
Same..
It seemed pretty straight forward.
Yea, that’s not going to work at my house .
😂😂😂😂😂
As a person who values her sleep I would have been an old maid
Honestly I was literally thinking that hahahaha
I will never be able to look at Amish the same. I know different sects are different but this takes the cake. 😮
😂😂
RIGHT if anyone asks me if i want to date them at midnight im throwing them out
Same 😂
To non Amish, “bundling” is when you have Flo combine your home and auto insurance.
Underrated comment
Took me a sec...
🤣 I ugly laughed.
Heehee
dammit take the like
Wow. That's very different. It's improper to be seen together in daylight, but rolling around in bed kissing after hours is totes fine.
The Amish are full of hypocrisy.
kissing does not impregnate you so I understand why they are ok with it.
@@LovedLamb I mean... kissing easily leads to stuff that gets you pregnant
@@nicj5354 I think we people have enough free will and understanding of responsibility to not let it get to it.
@@LovedLambagreed, it makes more sense when you consider that modern society almost looks down upon people exercising self control while the defining feature of the Amish to most outsiders is voluntarily not adopting technology even if it would make things easier.... as in self control.
Interesting that bundling means something different in this context. In the colonial era of the US, a man courting a woman at her parents house would share her bed (to get to know her and because maybe he lives far away and needs to stay over). However, they were physically separated by a piece of wood called a "bundling board", or he was bundled by being sewn into a bag. It was considered a good sign if they could stay up all night talking, but there was to be NO touching.
Yeah that’s what bundling means, bundling is the whole being in bed together thing. I think Lizzie misunderstood that it’s just the hugging thing
@@fromspace7Or maybe in her culture they used this term but the practice has changed over time. The meanings of words morph, you know?
Staying up all night talking is an EXCELLENT sign, but what horrible sleep I would have gotten lol
@@Phoenix-zy1cx Yeah I also read something slightly different, that bundling is where they lay in bed together and spend the night talking or whatever but no touching. However it's entirely possible that Lizzie's community did it this way whereas others do it differently and I think some Amish communities don't do it at all. There is a lot of variations in rules for many Amish communities.
~:~
I've also called the board a "sparking board" to prevent sparks I guess 😂
So you're not allowed to have intimate relations, but the only time you're permitted to meet is at night and in private...
The amish are totally having premarital sex they just don't acknowledge it in public lol
that's why it only takes 2 weeks and a half till marriage in case a pregnancy happens
That is exactly what I was thinking
At night, in private, and in bed. What could go wrong?
It's one of those things where everyone knows what is going on behind closed doors, but as long as it stays behind closed doors nobody cares.
This sounds so insane, I feel like someone is playing a prank on me
I know everyone is skeeved out by the sketchy four guys coming to your house in the middle of the night. Fair! But I’m just imagining how much NOISE this would cause. Guys going in and out, up and down the stairs? Going into the kitchen etc? I’m a light sleeper so this would be keeping me awake! What is the rest of the household doing while all this pitter patter is going on? Amish houses aren’t huge, I have to imagine the parents and all the siblings can hear all this going on. You’d have no privacy. I’d be pissed not just randos being in my house but at the comings and goings causing so much noise! Not to mention the talking, walking etc! I’d tell everyone to go out and party in the barn or whatever other buildings Amish people have on their property.
I wondered about this, too.
Maybe that's also a precaution measure, so that the actual intercourse does not happen because there are other 10-19 family members behind the walls most likely hearing the activity. They are not seen together but clearly heard of what they do together.
However, hard time for parents for sure
@@kateryna_polovyk Do Amish siblings also share bedrooms? I’m assuming it’s broken down by gender so 3 brothers in one bedroom, 3 sisters in one bedroom etc. Do the sisters sharing the bedroom with the sister being wooed also have to witness all this awkward Amish dating in their bedroom? Also witnessing the lying down together and cuddling? Luckily it’s only every 2 weeks and I guess you can be more open once you are officially dating so this part doesn’t last too long. I have so many questions 😂
Yes, but considering this is their way of life, I’m sure you’d get used to it because it would just be normal. I’m sure they have their own way of doing things as to know not to be loud in the middle of the night. The thing I’d be more mad about is lack of privacy.
“Go party in the barn” 😂😂😂😂😂
This sounds like the perfect setup for SA to happen 😳
It’s very high in this culture because nobody talks about it and it’s always the women shamed for “allowing” it. That is if they even say anything. There’s a reason those women who escape rarely go back.
Right that's what I said!
That’s the point imo
I immediately thought of this
Exactly my thought
Wow. A lot of peer pressure on the girl. Hard to say no to a group of guys.
I’ll be honest, I thought the same at first too. But also imagine you have these guys in your room but also you share a room with 1-3 sisters, you have a few brothers in another room, a dad, maybe an uncle or grandfather as well. If you said no then it’s a no. And if you’re hanging out as a group and your sisters are there too and they don’t like a guys vibe then you’re in charge enough that the girls have the home court advantage. It’s not done sneakily. It’s done to keep the girls safe and home. It’s probably safer than 90% of the dates I went on as a young girl. I graduated in 2005 so I was leaving home with no GPS, no cell phone… just some printed out Mapquest directions, a handful of quarters and a “good luck!” Lol. I don’t see it as so terrible. There’s a lot of really shitty Amish culture but this one doesn’t seem as bad as it does at face value.
@@SwedePotato314 But why MIDNIGHT??? Come by after sunset or something. Not MIDNIGHT. When you're SLEEPING. I would have always said "no, frick off, I'm sleeping".
@@16poetisa lmao no I totally agree. I love my sleep I’d never date if I had to do it at that time. I can’t be up late like that for some boy and his friends no thank you haha imagine the parents too they must be exhausted lol
@@16poetisano electricity. By midnight, you've probably already gotten a few hours of sleep in. Annoying, but not that bad.
@@16poetisayou're in heat too you wouldn't say no.
There’s a lot of opportunity in this process for things to go horribly wrong for the girl involved.
Yep. Sexual assault city
I doubt it... This is a closed community, where everyone likely knows each other. If that were to occur, I'm thinking the guy, guys would be toast...
@@georgeelder8415 That’s very wishful thinking. In closed communities like this, because people know eachother they’re MORE likely to get away with really awful stuff. A lot of people don’t hold each other accountable because it’s the norm. I’ve heard countless horror stories about women who escaped these exact types of communities. Sexual assault statistics are really high in these types of communities
@@CrystalRose1111 Hey, that sounds very likely, as lots of closed cultures do protect their own... If I was her daddy, it wouldn't go well for him/them... I would want to meet the man first, if that's a thing in that culture...
@@georgeelder8415typically in a closed community where traditional gender roles are thought to be demanded by God, the girl will be blamed. Because those are good boys, right? She must have led them on, let it go too far, and now she wants it to look like it wasn’t all her fault to begin with.
This still happens in regular communities, in one like this, the boys are rarely to blame. What usually winds up happening is they get married, especially if the rape results in pregnancy, to ensure the woman makes it right.
Wow...if I woke up in tge middle of the night to see 3 boys around my age (of I was a teen or younger adult), my brain would immediately ho into "intruder, danger mode". Especially not having been given any information regarding this ritual. That just seems so intrusive to me.
I guess it would belike "I guess I'm on a date"
Speaking volumes of how old fashioned but trust requiring this method is.
Im so happy youtube algorithm randomly recommended you to me because everything you're saying in your shorts and videos is always so interesting.
Welcome aboard! I love it 😊
I love that CC changed Schwartzentruber Amish to Scorcher Trooper homage 😂
Mine said Sports RUclipsr Rubbish 😂 😂😂
Mine says "SWS and true barish"
I got scorcher trooper!
Your parents allow 3 guys in your bedroom @ midnight!? WOW
Yeah definitely didn’t go how I expected it was going to go 😂
Wtf
Four guys actually 😁 The main one plus 3 extras 😁
Was thinking same thing!! Wth? 🤦♀️
I know right? Really surprising 😮
I've often wondered how the different rules/traditions came about, especially for how your former sect dated. Those are some pretty out-there dating traditions for a socially conservative religious group. It's always interesting to listen to you talk about your life growing up. I grew up in rural York county PA back in the 70's/early 80's, which was close to the Amish and Mennonite communities in both York and Lancaster counties. We would pass by the farms and the buggies on the road pretty regularly, and visit the farm stands/stores during summer/fall, plus the restaurants featuring 'Amish' food. It got very commercialized over time and many moved away, especially those who still wanted to farm, since the area was getting built up with subdivisions.
The house better be on fire if 3 dudes are busting into my room at 12am.
Living around an Amish area, one time my wife came across a buggy late at night that was tilted badly to one side. She thought they had broken a spring or something. No, that wasn't what was going on......
They were testing the springs...😂😂
@@adedayod-one7470that's not something you joke about, tf.
@@Chinelolamb right! Finding Amish teenagers bumping belly's away from their Amish elders is totally not amusing. I forgot we now live in a woke world for a second. [deep sigh]
@@adedayod-one7470 I hope you never get assaulted.
@@Chinelolamb What are you on about,? where in
@kibashisiyoto6771 's comment does it say assault...seriously WTAF is wrong with you? How does buggy funtime translate to assault. The original video mentions nothing of assault, the comment mentions nothing of assault where did ONLY YOU get that? The video is about dating, relationships and alleged teenage Amish funtime!
Just when I thought the Asian vs Swiss dating is very different. *jaw drops* at this! 😱 Isn’t it dangerous so have soooo many guys with a girl even though sex is prohibited. I mean people do a lot of crazy things even when there are rules!
I think their community is too small for them to get away with doing bad things. Also she is not alone at home at age 16 she prolly lived with her parents.
@LovedLamb actually, SA is rampant in this culture.
@@LovedLamb most of SA in the world is caused by close relatives or spouses at home, not strangers in the park at night. So I don't think the fact that it's a small community is helping much here.
@@alicjakaminska5762 I do not believe that is entirely true, yes maybe with relatives, but I have seen studies claiming that majority of child sexual abuse is done by other children for example 13 year old raping 6 year old brother. I know people who tried to kill themselves because even during adulthood his brother kept sending him flirty messages to trigger him.
It being a small community really is a problem tho, cuz they would sacrifice safety for peace.
@@LovedLambsa and abuse is rampant in these small religious communities
Lizzie, I'm a Amish girl who is totally shocked with your story and glad you escaped from that, I did hear a few people mention that the swartentruber amish date in bed but i never believed that and I'm horrified. I'm thankful for my community and just so you know, we and all the surrounding communities i know of go out to youth groups, volleyball games, the parks, singings, even bowling and dinner to date someone... I'm sorry you never experienced that in your community!!! You're beautiful by the way🤗 God bless you!
If I were a parent I would be uncomfortable with dating happening late at night and my kid being alone with that many people without any supervision. I’d probably be constantly checking on them or stay near the door because in my mind, that would be the perfect scenario for some sick pervert to take advantage of someone. But that’s my opinion
don't forget the guy has also been raised in strict amish and his 3 other friends know if he is trustworthy so i doubt they would break the rules.
Fact
@@ronblack7870 sometimes friends don’t always know when someone is sick mentally like that. I’m not saying his friends are wrong, I’m just saying as a parent you can’t be too careful. I would t not allow my kids to date when I have them one day, I just would make sure they understand that they have a right to say no and so do other people. And if someone of the opposite gender were in their room I’d stay near their room to make sure they were alright.
Oh my goodness. They come at midnight?! I don't think I can express how much that would scare me. And I would be cranky at being woken up lol. Also, who is supposed to supervise these 'bundling' sessions? What happens if the guy or girl just starts getting way too carried away?
She was pretty clear that it was unsupervised. This is probably what the two weeks or less engagement is for.
As an ExJW, this is the most bizarre courtship ritual ive ever heard of. And we needed to be chaparoned to even get ice cream.
😉 There is always something more than what you have known about to be weird/extreme before.
But I am also happy you've also made it out of your cult/sect.
Were there siblings trying to sleep in the same room while this was happening?
Seriously good question. She has eighteen siblings. For sure they didn't all have private rooms! I suppose, with luck and proper coordination, you could have a double date.
I recall a story of twins who both had their weddings on the same day and then also had their honeymoons on opposite sides of the same upstairs room that evening…
(I believe these were Old Order Mennonites.)
Probably. That's why it was the safest place to date haha surrounded by your sisters. Your brothers next door and your parents downstairs
This is so many red flags omg 😮
I had heard of"Bundling" but never knew much about it 😳It sounds like the Schwartzentruber Amish Group that you came from have Very Different Dating practices than the Other Amish Groups. Thank You for Sharing your Life Experiences! May God Bless and Protect You Always! 🌹🌹🌹🌹🙏
I've had some wild experiences but this my dear is nightmare fuel. So glad you got outta there
Whaaaa-?! This is mind blowing! What a fascinating explanation. Gonna go down the rabbit hole of your channel now…
Love the auto-generated captions: "scorcher trooper homage" and "sports RUclipsr rubbish" 😅😅
This is sooo wild! Who knew. Not me! But really cool to learn. Thanks for the insight
So, when an Amish girl is about to reach her climax with a guy, I can hear her yell " Oh, Oh Jebediah plow my field". Or she could say to a man, " Oh please, don't stop, do it to me Johnny, do it to me buggy style".
I was told bundling is when dates sleep in the same bed with a barrier down the center. Probably a different Amish sect.
That’s what it originally was.
There was a pretty similar practise in Switzerland and some parts of Germany and France in the 16-17th century (maybe earlier and later too but thats when it was written about most) called Kiltgang where basically if a young man was interested in a young woman he could spend the night in her bed (fully clothed ideally) and they got to know each other. Whether that included any kind of physical inimacy varied, but it doesnt seem to have been like prohibited. The people who seemed to have a problem with it were mostly moralists and priests, more than lay people
If it’s consensual, it doesn’t seem like the worst idea. It kind of reminds me of living with someone before you get married.
@@LaceyMyriah yeah, people need to know each other in an intimate way before they decide to spend the rest of their life together. They need to find out if they're sexually compatible. Having a great relationship with someone outside of sex is great and all, but it doesn't necessarily mean they are intimately compatible with each other. Sex is a very personal thing. And so you could have this great relationship with them in every respect EXCEPT for sex. And if you don't find that out _BEFORE_ you get married then you could end up screwed, pun intended. It could lead to a marriage that's full of mutual resentment and a dead bedroom. That's why the no sex before marriage rule actually harms the possibility of successful marriages. These hyper religious people hate the idea of divorce generally. But if they allowed a couple to have sex before marriage, then the percentage of marriages that last a lifetime and are happy and mutually loving and compatible in all respects, would greatly increase. If you only find out on the wedding night that you're sexually incompatible then what do you do? You either have to spend the rest of your life in a marriage of resentment and stress and anxiety, or get it quick divorce very early on into the marriage.
That's what most fundamentalist Christians want, right? Successful marriages, and fewer divorces. Yet they shun the things that lead to more marriages being successful and lasting.
@@duffman18I agree with you that the no sex before marriage rule gets in the way of successful marriages, but most religious fundamentalists I know are too obsessed with the concept of virginity and marrying a virgin to let go of it
@@duffman18that sounds good on paper but i find it hard to believe that sexual compatibility will lead to significantly less divorce.
1) sure, it's nice to both want similar things, but let's just say this - even "OK" sex is pretty damn good, speaking from personal experience. a committed married couple can deal with 5/10 sex just fine as long as they both love each other and want the marriage to last. life isn't the red shoe diaries and sex is often boring.
2) people get bored all the time in marriages. how is sex exempt from this? i'm sure even 8/10 sex can get old if you hit the jackpot and marry a great match. there's always someone better, there's always someone more attractive, and you all too often meet these people when you're in a relationship.
essentially, what will lead to less divorce is MORE GUARDRAILS AGAINST IT. make it socially and religiously difficult to divorce. have laws be inclined to discourage it. make stuff like alimony tough to get.
yes, you'll have miserable married couples, but you also have miserable singles and miserable divorced.
i think purposelessness and wanting unattainable things is what's causing these problems, not us being sexually unadventurous enough in the west. god knows THAT'S done enough damage.
@@duffman18just for context, i'm not religious but definitely would be as a way to give my life (and my wife & children) some structure & values. as society is a mess right now and religious subculture is almost just as bad, i'm just casually dating women and not planning on marriage or kids. it's a bad deal these days.
So, I was getting really nervous when you talked about FOUR dudes going to your house, but when you described them basically making themselves at home, which is noisy, I swttled down a bit. Then I got really nervous wwhen you mentioned this bundling thing, but then you mention that it's basically just cuddling. Well. Overall, that was pretty... cute, I guess? It is very odd, but regardless of how seemingly dangerous that was, it didn't turn out to be remotely as bad as I anticipated. I find it kinda funny how the vibes of the situation are like, "she let me touch her shoulder" 😂 And what with others mentioning that Amish families are just so big and that she's very likely to be in a room with several other sisters and the rest of the family behind thin walls calms me down a lot more about this. The only thing is that your parents are going to know how many boys you turned down and I can imagine that the pressure to marry would be high when they basically have a front row seat to your business :/
These videos are fascinating!! Please post more😁💗
Okay this sounds so creepy 😭
Several years ago me and a buddy were camping in Mid Ohio (Amish Country). It was well past midnight when we turned in for the night. As I'm laying there trying to fall asleep, I hear the clip clop of horse hooves over the low rumble of wagon wheels. I was bewildered as to why Amish would be out so late especially with church the next morning. Turns out it was a bunch of dudes trying to date Lizzie. It all makes perfect sense now.
0:29 ah, yes, the Scorcher Troopers were my favorite soldiers in Star Wars
This was interesting 😄
In a good way 😅
Edit: I'm not sure, if I should share this, but years ago happened so, that I spend a night with a man I liked, and we just talked and slept a bit. This happened few times, we would meet in a bar (small town, not that many bars), hang out, end up in same place for the night (most likely either one's home), it was really nice. Very sweet.
Well, we never dated, but apparently it kinda reminds of amish dating 😅 Oops 😊
This is wild. In the worst way. Lol
I read about bundling in an 1800s book by a woman who grew up Amish. I got the idea that the purpose was that the houses were cold in the winter. After the family had gone to bed, to save firewood they were not allowed to keep adding wood to the fire, so, to have these long talks, the young couple would bundle in the bed to keep warm. (They didn't mention rolling around as part of it.)
Wow… So without having any knowledge of this at the Time?? When I was 19/20 I totally “Bundled” with a girl before we started actually dating… very similar. No kissing. Literally just talked and I “kept her warm”. She must’ve felt secure … bc it happened again. Still no kissing. And we started dating after a few months of that happening. That was 2006. 4 kids later and we’ve been married for 12 years.
That was a roller coaster ride. I love how the boys roll up mafia style and advocate for thier homie. 😂😂
To think that happens with the blessing of parents blows my mind. A girl and a boy in the bedroom together for hours - unsupervised.
Was there even a suggestion that might happen with my daughter, the boy would never darken my door again. And, I would have a serious man-to-boy talk with him, afterwhich he would never want to see me again.
To my "english" mind, this tradition is lunacy.
Yeah I can’t even imagine. Here I thought the Amish were conservative Christian’s. Now I wonder.
I have two teenage daughters. Here in Germany, it is fine for teenage couples to have sleepovers. But I would strongly encourage them to get to know the guy by daylight first 😄
@@Psychiatricnerd I think it is important to remember that the Amish are really a cult. Like most cults, it's not surprising to discover sexual perversion as standard practice.
@@insulanerin7601letting your teenager have sleepovers with the opposite sex is the most idiotic and irresponsible parenting ever. And this is coming from a fellow European. Please don’t ever make that foolish mistake with your children. Your daughters deserve better parenting than that.
@@fromspace7 Good parenting ist raising responsible kids, not locking them up.
This sounds like a fever dream/nightmare
Funny enough this is similar to some ancient traditions in other cultures. The first to come to mind is in ancient Sparta, men would sneak out of the barracks to visit women at night (though usually for sex and we have no way of knowing how consenting the women were). I know a few other cultures did the “nighttime date” thing so as horrifying as it is, it’s also very interesting to see it around in modern day.
Are your ancestors from a Greek island? My grandfather's surname looks almost identical to your screenname...
What if noone comes visiting you at night?
Or if you reject all suitors?
Are the girls allowed to be proactive too?
Or do you become an old maid?
I suppose if a girl starts to get into mid to late 20s and is still single her family might start looking for a suitable guy, asking around if anyone knows anyone etc
If the prospects within the local Amish community aren't panning out, the parents will often send the dateable age youth off to different community for a while to stay with an uncle or to help out somebody and see if something develops that way.
@@kibashisiyoto6771 sounds plausible, thanks
This is WILD. My southern dad would NEVER allow a handful of teenage boys in my room at night. What in the world??? My mom wouldn’t allow handful teenage boys in her kitchen after it’s closed at night either.
Bundling sounds a bit like dry humping to me but what do I know lol. I was only allowed to have a few boys in my room and it was regular hours and door had to be open!
Thanks for sharing that was entertaining.
PLEEEEEASE do way more of these types of videos!!! Please!!!! I love hearing about it
Really!
Do some about "a day of my like" working around the house, gardening and such
I’m completely stunned. Thanks for sharing because otherwise I would have never known this fascinating information.
This sounds bizarre and frankly disgusting. You can't be seen together more than once every two weeks, you can't be seen together in the daytime, but his friends can come to your bedroom and pressure you to have an early hours fumble at 16. That's some creepy shit! People who love and respect each other, and want good relationships for the people they love, would want them to socialise with prospective partners a lot, openly, during the day, and without stupid restrictions.
Why can the couple only see each other at night. Most other cultures are being seen during the day proper. As an anthropologist who grew up around a lot of Amish, I’m extremely intrigued.
Probably something about looking proper. I'd imagine seeing a bunch of guys going somewhere, neighbors could never guess who is courting who. I also imagine that most households have multiple daughters. Which means the noisy neighbors really can't assume and gossip
I would also bet that they might have multiple boys “dating”multiple daughters as many families have such a large number in the homes.
religious shame will make you do crazy things
I get how this works. It’s a weird system to test time apart, longer term(for teens) and physical intimacy without sex. I understand the principle behind it but gosh it sounds crazy.
I think the knee-jerk reaction in modern culture is from how wildly beyond expectations it is.
That's horrifying a group of young men just come to your room while you're sleeping. I've been dating the same dude for 4 years and I still reflexively hit him when I'm not expecting him to be around me and he sneaks up on me and scares me.
Ok, I'm sorry but that description of of "bundling" was the most *Schrute family thing I've ever heard!
*there's a show called "The Office" in which there is a character and his family that are supposedly based off of the Amish. However, everything about them and their traditions are scripted to be over the top and ridiculous. Basically unbelievable.
Bundling sounds so fake and like "what the Hell? How did this even start? Why?!?!". Don't get me wrong, I absolutely believe you! I just was not at all expecting it 😶
*UPDATE*
I showed my husband this video and he started bundling me 😂
This bundling thing sounds completely horrifying!
I thought it was code for dry humping 🙈
Agreed omg 🤢
It's just making out...but it seems odd that a supposedly puritanical culture prescribes so many opportunities for temptation in dating...
this is wild. you said it’s not an arranged marriage but it sure sounds like arranged dating with all these men coming to your door asking if you would go out with their friend. then having those friends come over on your first date with the guy that’s interested. it’s pretty wild lol.
well it would be good to get the story from the guy's side. maybe the guy saw her in church and wanted to go on a date with her. i think the 3 other friends are there to make sure it's all on the level . he gets them to take him over there . i don't think it's the 3 guys arranging anything really.
How does that make it an arranged marriage? It's extremely common for groups of boys/girls of school age to go and tell someone that their friend likes them and try to convince them to go out. This happens all over the US. She said it herself that you can marry who you want and she was allowed to say no to the dates
I like the letter writing thing.
Ah, "resting Sunday" makes sense now 😅
I love reading the Amish books❤
I like how she laughs when she starts explaining what “bundling” is
The only advantage I can see here... if you can only see each other at night that means you're already tired/exhausted from the day and your social batteries are drained. That _could_ be great training for later into adult life when all you wanna do is go home to some peace and quiet... will this person match your energy level (or lack thereof)?
I'm surprised there was no chaperones, like in some conservative modern colonial societies, its nice that the couple was allowed time to just talk privately to each other ♡
and what does “getting in trouble” mean if you’re caught seeing each other again before the two weeks
I keep wondering about this whenever Lizzie mentions it 😂
What's the reasoning behind not being allowed to be seen together?
I’d also like to know. I’ll see if I can look it up
It's a week later and haven't found a real answer to this. Based on the articles I read about Amish courtships, they mostly talk about bundling and wedding customs. Nothing I was able to find indicated Amish couples are forbidden to be seen together. But I'm going to guess that it has something to do with avoiding the appearance of sexual sin, being a good example, etc.
@@LoveKillFear777 I appreciate that you actually came back after doing the legwork, even if you didn't find a conclusive answer. Most people would just forget about it and move on.
@@LoveKillFear777Maybe the two weeks would be long enough to see if the "bundling" resulted in something...less than virtuous happened (ie long enough for pregnancy symptoms to show).
That's certainly different! My strict parents would have some very wide eyes after that one. Basically the opposite of how I was taught, minus the very poor sex ed.... (as in, at night only, several guys approaching to get permission or convince is a good sign, sharing a _bed_ , no mention of meeting the parents first, etc...
And the only rule is "keep your clothes on" while you roll around in bed together...
It's so telling that anything related to intimacy is "hidden" and not talked about. It makes me sad how many people must grow up fearing a part of themselves that's most natural.
Just that “clip clip clip clop “ was amazing at the scene
🤣 My daughters boyfriends would all have died on the porch if they had tried that.
another question: if dating can only happen when nobody else sees it- how do you know if you're the only one the guy is dating? is this knowledge shared otherwise or do you just hope for the best?
I’m curious what your favorite music is 🎶 and how that evolved since you were young perhaps sneaking music 🎵
I find this Very interesting...Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
Between that story and watching your food get cold I don’t know what makes me more uncomfortable 😂😂😂
But truly interesting insight into a community / culture I know so little about
Absolutely Fascinating - but what are you making? That looks really good!
I grew up Amish and this is the craziest shit I ever heard🤣🤦🏼♂️
Thanks for the lesson! That was interesting and informative!
Very civilized indeed.
"Look at this distinguished couple"
I like how respectful both parties involved were. Maybe I should try Amish dating, if I can.
My Christian raised brain cannot comprehend. No man within the vicinity of my bedroom.
Wow, even if I did like men to begin with, I'd have a difficult time pretending to be enthusiastic about being woken up at midnight. Do you get kicked out if you don't date? Would I get kicked out for being ace?
This is the wildest thing I’ve ever heard! Keep your clothes on but lay in bed snuggling each other in your bed? I can’t believe they let y’all do that! I’m not Amish and I wouldn’t let my daughter have a boy in her room doing any of that day or night!😮
I’m confused. Have you met this guy ever before he comes with the other guys to ask to date you? Do you just have random guys coming to your house in the middle of the night? How does that even come about?!
You woke me up at midnight to ask me on a date with your mates, I'd be single for life!
...A group of boys coming up to my room at around midnight gets a shot gun surprise, and I don't mean by my pappy.
So in a nutshell, they trained these boys to have one night stands
I’ve seen a lot of “movies” that start off the exact same way lol 😂 sounds like fun!
As a non Amish my mother would never ever ever ever agree to this way of dating!
Wow. So much here to wrap my mind around. 🤔
For real gorgeous in your casual form too.
Wait cause hold up, what if your teenage self found out he was bundling with another girl?
Can you do a video on how the straight pins used in dresses don’t stab you? Maybe explain instances when they have caused serious injury? Please help
I am wondering the same thing
Also, why not just use buttons? Buttons have been around for thousands of years, long before Jesus, so I can't imagine that they would be too "modern."
@@sarahmonte1069I’m not Amish, but my FIL drives Amish around (to like doctors apts and stuff) and he said that (at least for the Amish community where he lives), the button prohibition was made at a time where people were getting really fancy with their dress decor. Stuff like buttonholes and buttons could be (and were) elaborately embroidered or carved (iirc, buttons were also made out of mussel shell, too??) so the Amish decided to remove all potential for vanity and ban buttons altogether.
For her community, though, idk.
@@Jessamineann Ahhh, that makes sense. Thank you.
Thanks for talking about this! I’m an ex Jehovah’s Witness and while we didn’t share a lot of similarities, when I tell people the dating culture they’re always shocked.
this sounds a lot like japanese heian dating-marriage custom, very interesting
Can we please all stop using fascinating to describe this scenario. This situation is scary and intrusive. 99% women prefer their privacy especially at night, during bedtime. The fact that this is the only dating option offered is dangerous, offensive and wrong. Please stop saying this is fascinating. You don't understand what its like to be a woman put in uncomfortable situations. 💯
So say no. Seems easy enough to me.
Meanwhile in my “English” home my fiance wasn’t allowed upstairs in my parents’ home (where my bedroom was)
Wow. I was raised in a pretty strict church (not as strict as Amish) and this never would have been allowed. But I suppose there’s a lot of trust put in your innocence and following the rules.
Omg its wayyy too complicated for me😭😂
Whoa. 😮 I'm not even as strict. No group of guys is showing up in my house and marching into my daughters bedroom. 😂
My question is Who would allow these guys in the house during nighttime? My parents would be mad at anyone who'd disturb their (and my) sleep.
This sounds absolutely crazy to me. So fascinating though!
This feels wrong is so many ways..
Your captions interpreted Schwartzendruber as “Scorcher Trooper” lol someone else probably caught it too but if not, it’s too funny not to share
This was so interesting! Thank you for sharing ^_^