For me there is a difference between being into trans women and being in love with a trans woman. It’s tough to go through trying to figure out what you really want. It doesn’t matter to me what others think. If they find out they do. It’s shameful to me because if what I’ve been around but I have to live with it
Teri was the most together well rounded character on the show. As an ally I appreciated that Teri also had her own tribe, a group of family and friends who were not here for Donnie taking their girl for granted. Most depictions of transwomen tend to isolate them but Teri had a full regular life with people who loved and felt protective towards her. The actress who played her was so pretty too 😊❤
Which I love. I love when trans people are depicted as having supportive friends and family. When trans people are shown as loved and cared for. Yes showing trans struggles is important, but so is trans joy. Seeing representation of trans joy and love brings so much hope and empowers trans people to see a possible light at the end of the tunnel.
Teri’s character arc was amazing. They fully humanised her and made her a well rounded and relatable heroine of the show. Normally in media trans people haven’t been written well at all so this was refreshing. She was a gem ❤
It's also good to depict the raw reality of abusive cycle, trauma cycle, stalking rape unfiltered realistic. As having male friends who been victim of both abuse and rape (though this was female perpetrators) it shown that abuse and victims of such have no gender. It happens to the best of us it's awful. So i love this show
I also felt like Martha didn’t even call Teri a man because she knew for a fact she was a trans woman, she just wanted to insult her, and she used that because most women don’t like to be told that they look like a man, just my perception.
I'm curious if there's like a Bechdel test for trans representation. Seems pretty case-by-case. Like The Danish Girl wasn't ideal (played by straight actor Eddie Redmayne who seems to get every role in Hollywood) but it was still pretty good rep for the time (i.e. 9 years ago).
He is so supportive and understanding about everything. Also all the yelling at Martha shows him being caring in an intense way. I love that kind of character.
The partner of a trans person needs guts. It's not only whats society in general thinks about trans folks like us, it's also the curiosity of so many friends, for example for our sex lives. I never heard anybody asking a hetero couple about how they are having sex, for example. Several people asked us. Anyways, my partner stands 100% behind me and everybody, that doesn't do that, is NOT the right partner. Good luck to you Samantha!
I get what you’re saying but people don’t ask hetero couples that because they already know the answer. But a couple with a trans person in it can still be hetero but I know what you meant you meant a man and a woman
Watching Baby Reindeer really hit close to home for me. I identify as a straight man and have a life experience I want to share. Please be supportive. A few years ago, I got very close to this woman whom I didn't know was trans. We were kind of going out, but didn't really label it. When it started getting more serious, she pushed me away, explained she was trans, and told me I wouldn't be happy with her. It was immensely confusing. I spent some time figuring out how I felt, what it meant for me, if I was ready to face everything that came with that. A few weeks later, I worked up the courage to tell her that it didn't matter and that I loved her the way she was. It was genuine. I really meant it. I got rejected hard, though. I found out through our conversations that she knew I was into her for a long while and was just keeping me around for validation. It was devastating... Made me question a lot of things about my self-worth, sexuality, and masculinity. To make matters worse, I didn't really feel I could talk about it to anyone, so I didn't for a very long time and it turned into serious depression. On the one hand, I promised her I wouldn't tell anyone we knew about her being trans; on the other, I felt immense shame at admitting to my close friends and family just what I was going through... I eventually talked about it to my parents and some of my close friends. It was absolutely terrifying.They took it well, though. I'm now working all of that out through therapy. It is getting less difficult to accept and talk about. I am glad Baby Reindeer opened the conversation about men's experiences with trans women and overcoming toxic masculinity. Anyway, I am posting this here because I feel like I need all the support I can get. Please be kind ❤
Thank you for commenting on this and being susceptible to vulnerability by opening up & sharing your story.... I think that despite taking that risk of doing so, you also shed light on the unique experiences of certain straight men who are more prone to sensitivity and empathy, and are more of the mindset of unconditional love, romance and sentimental intimacy when engaging in dating activities; yet they may have had toxic experiences with individuals who are members of a minority, and/or are part of a historically marginalized community. Toxic is toxic...trauma is trauma...but in that same vein, love is love! The beauty of life around you via validation and reaffirmation of your self-worth through a rekindling of your inner-self, is what I think, the key to your own sustained happiness. As another fellow straight-man (both biologically & gender-identifying), I'm sending much love to u bro!!👊🙌
And Terri is SO FLESHED OUT. Like she’s such a dynamic character that feels three dimensional and isn’t flattened to just “love interest” as Samantha said. And I think that that’s also what makes it so good
@@Encorezero nobody is pretending to menstruate, nobody that's taken seriously by the trans community, at least. This is a strawman argument. Just because you've seen somebody who self identifies as trans claiming to menstruate despite being unable to does not mean every trans woman does so.
As a 40 yo trans woman, you said a lot of things I need to reflect on about myself. Thank you, I don’t think I could have come to these reflective positions without this video.
i'm definitely going to have to watch this show. even from this review, it seems like it's going to be a very good resource for not only straight men and trans women struggling with unhealthy masculinity, but also for all of those that are struggling to understand what society really means when we say "unhealthy masculinity."
Remembering now the way the show depicted his relationship with Teri - the show never tries to argue that he is in the right for treating Teri the way he did. Not reporting her assault by Martha, stepping off the train, lying about his name and job - he was ashamed of these things and the show makes them a gut punch revelation that he is carrying like an open wound. He isn’t making excuses and deflecting the harm his avoidance is causing. It’s his story and his point of view so he could very easily have viewed things like this as ‘it’s fine I did this because it makes sense’. The story informs us why he is making bad, hurtful, self sabotaging choices. It doesn’t crucify him, it doesn’t vindicate him. She isn’t an object in his story that he’s responding to, she’s a person he felt safe with in a world that made him feel unsafe. His lack of communication isn’t aggrevating because it’s clear to us that he is processing and doesn’t actually fully understand his own feelings and behaviour due to the trauma going unaddressed. It’s a tragedy
This is so true to life for men who are genuinely attracted to transwomen (and not just chasers). My trauma also led to experimentation and questioning in a highly toxic Southern family, which is one of the reasons I don't really have anything to do with them anymore. I was told I would be disowned if I was gay, which I eventually threw in my Dad's face when I revealed what had happened to me and how it had warped my sexuality in ways I never asked for. Thankfully, I called his bluff, but I've still never felt like I could date the type of women that I am truly attracted to. This extends not only to transwomen, but non-binary as well. I am so glad this type of media is finally entering the collective consciousness, because there are so many men out there that want to pursue relationships with transwomen but have no representation or modeling for how to go about it and no idea who to talk to either. Hopefully this will spark a lot of conversations that need to be had in our culture.
Hey Man. I used to be in a similar situation to you, with my dad essentially telling me he will always love me as long as I am not gay... Glad to hear IT worked out for you and stay strong. Eventually society will progress past the need to shame MEN for being seen as anything less than straight.
Love your content! I'm a straight demisexual straight man and in my teens and until recently, I lived in a very conservative catholic country in the south of Europe and even if my parents were mostly open and tolerant, I still got that toxic masculinity imprinted into my monkey brain. I wore clothes I didn't like to assert my masculinity (more classic than I would like), had cut my hair short because when I was younger and had long hair, people would make fun of me and call me a girl. Now, I'm 45 and back in my home-country of Switzerland and I have long hair and wear black t-shirt and skinny black jeans, I let my beard run wild (doesn't mean unkept) and I don't give a flying feck if people still judge me. Now, I laugh when people are surprised I'm a dude and have such good hair. It's not like women have exclusivity on that!? XD
Watching this show and his relationship with Teri broke me heart, because they were showing me in the show how good they were for each other, how at ease. How they were in love and could be so happy together. I knew the tension of the show would make things come to a head, and it very clearly showed how Donny’s personal sexual trauma and ongoing stress was the obstacle, not Teri being trans. It was heartbreaking that he didn’t know how to communicate it to her. And he wasn’t lashing out or blaming her
Please please please more of this! I loved learning a new way to look at the world, the behind the scenes/nitty gritty of how to do the analysis alongside your usual dead on takes! Also hi to your dog!!!
I've heard a lot of the talk about baby reindeer, regarding the stalker and sexual assualt. I'm glad that there is trans representation - I'm also glad that none of the topical, controversial parts of the show involved someone being transgender. This is the first I'm hearing about the character, which might be sad in the fact that they deserve more recognition, but at least that's not "why" it's controversial. It's hard to hear anything in the media about trangender people without it immediately having a discrimination bias😢
Teri was super cool. The only thing that felt kinda weird for me at first was that Doni actively searched for a trans woman to date. Idk how to interpret this. Also him being bisexual was really important for his character development and i loved the way they portrayed him coming in terms with his sexuality (especially with all his sexual trauma and stuff). But even if he was straight i believe that we shouldn't just focus on letting straight men know they are still straight if dating trans women. I know that it's super important for trans women safety first and foremost but imo we should also erase the whole shame about being non straight at the same time if we want things to really improve.
Honestly the overall shame related to being perceived as less than straight for what you are attracted to is a big deal. For some reason, people (well, MEN, mainly) are still worried something will 'make them gay'.
If you're a cis straight man, and you date a trans woman, you're still straight. If you're a cis bi man, and you date a trans woman, you're not straight, but you're still dating a woman. Simple as that, I don't get what's so complicated about that, you're still a man, dating a woman, who's only attracted to women, cis or not.
It looked Sus at first, but you see in episode five that he's engaging in hypersexuality across the board to cope with his trauma. I don't think the trans dating site was the only one he used. The others were probably just not shown.
Little piece of info you may have missed Sam. Richard Gadd identifies as bisexual. I loved the show. I felt like Teri was the most relatable trans character I have ever seen, and I’ve gone through a lot of what she did in her relationship with the main character. The show DOES perpetuate the stereotype, that if you’re a man attracted to a trans woman, you’re bisexual in some way. But since it’s a true story, and it’s Gadd’s experience, I’ll ignore it. One of the most accurate moments in the show, was when Terri asks Gadd how he identifies sexually, and when he says bisexual, Teri is very obviously guarded, and asks “what makes you bi?” A LOT of straight men, who have no attraction to men, but do date trans women, think they’re bisexual. Because dating trans women means you’re not straight… right? So her guarded response, was so accurate to reality, and it’s a conversation I’ve had myself a few times
I think he was referring to the fact that he hooked up with men following his assault? But didn’t want to share that part with her because he didn’t want to admit to the assault. That’s how I saw it but I could be missing something.
@@djaktak no like if you actually look up Richard Gadd, he identifies as bisexual. And in his speech where he opens up about the assault, he talks about coming to terms with not being straight
@@theavengers01 OK guys I looked this up. This guy is spreading lies. Samantha Lux has not defended pdf files. There was a professor who's literally working to prevent child abuse, who wrote a thesis about those who have attractions towards children, but do not act upon it, and are trying to be better. In that thesis, the professor referred to these people as MAPs. It caused a stir in the college campus they were working in, causing them to be fired. They were later hired by another college, to do more research in order to prevent child abuse. They were not a pdf file themselves, they were working to prevent child abuse. These people are misrepresenting them AND Samantha. The name of the professor is Allyn Walker if anybody is curious and wants to do research themselves.
@@De_Selby I find it so sad that people are calling Allyn a p*** because the type of work they're doing is so important. recognizing that people can be this way and NOT offend is an important step toward eliminating child abuse in the future. it shows that just because someone has a feeling doesn't mean they have to act on that feeling.
Thanks for your take on Baby Reindeer, particularly the handling of trans issues. I had read a comment online (not here) by someone that implied that the show was problematic because it was fatphobic and transphobic. I watched the show and I didn't perceive that at all, so I found your review reassuring!
One thing this show really did show me as a trans man dating a cis man is when donny has his breakdown on stage and is like "i met a trans woman recently" and my partners respone was "why did he say trans its literally not relevant" showed yh hes a good one.
I just loved every second where Terri was on screen. Specially the calling out scenes. I did laugh with the "good luck with the transexual". He is being supportive in an outdated way. I love that kind of moment. Also, the talk about her in my family ended up being about her being from Mexico. They were happy about seeing someone from Latin America.
Hi Samantha!❤ I’m a trans (non binary) kid/teen 🏳️⚧️ and I love your content! I’m leaving this comment because I was early and I’m never early😂ps your dog is very cute❤
I thought the show was shocking in it's portrayal of the psychological horror of stalking. Having it flipped onto a man is something you don't see portrayed the way it was here. As for Teri, she was my favorite character as the confidence she had in herself seemed to be the baseline she expected from everyone around her. As always, I love your perspective!
I know this was just posted but I am ftm and was extremely excited about the trans character in this series. Sadly I had ALOT of unexpected triggers throughout the show and am currently trying to get over them so I am not in the place to watch your video yet. I am interested in your opinions tho so I will defo be watching this at a later point in time. The series was really well done overall but it hit to close to home at some points ❤ I hope anyone who watched the series is doing okay around the subject involved and I'm sending everyone happy loving positive vibes ❤❤
@@Encorezero Nah, you're the one who needs to grow up. You clearly have nothing better to do than to reply to almost every comment talking sh*t. So, pathetic. Get a life.
I loved listening to your honest opinion on the struggles cishet men face when it comes to overcoming the toxic views they’ve been force fed their entire lives. It was not only sympathetic but also incredibly accurate. Kudos to you girl, I’m definitely, 1000% subscribing.
I died laughing when his dad waved him goodbye and said "Good luck with the transsexual!" I'm sad but also glad they didn't end up together because she is way too good for him lol.
I loved Teri. She was easily my favourite character. Such a beautiful person inside and out. The fact that Richard got anyone who saw her on screen to truly see her how he saw her is so so impressive. But also the actress who played her was fabulous in her role.
Glad you covered this, I was really glad that the show was showing this main romantic interest with a trans girl not as a side piece fling thing but actually story of developing love between them, but I didn’t really like how they handled the idea of dating her. Almost like she was only an interest to him because of his trauma, or something. Im glad they gave Terri a happy ending and didn’t do the whole “dating trans person=different sexuality” thing
I'm so glad that shows like Baby Reindeer exist. Everyone has their own traumas, so to see how someone made it through their own is very powerful ♥️ (On an aside, nail polish was the first thing I did to push back on expectations around me. Seemed scary at the time, but glad I did it for me.)
I have been watching your videos for a while and been a huge fan, but this video in particular, maybe its because I'm a transman and masculinity is a constant battleground for me- this video was really powerful. Thanks for always putting out great content.
I love this account. All your takes are nuanced and well thought out, and you approach them from all angles it seems. Just a truly nuanced and fair take whenever I watch your videos.
Great analysis, thanks for sharing your experience as always! It hit a bit at the end when Donny sees Terry going out with her new boyfriend, but it’s lovely to see her boundaries paying off in finding a guy that will actually show her off as she deserves.
I'm also so glad they used a real trans actor. We need real representation!! I also love her confidence like "either accept me fully or this won't work out"
Great video! I really liked how you weighed the different perspectives on Teri and Donny, from within, from each other, and from society and their pasts. I gotta say though it’s probably a good idea to get the show creator / lead actor’s name correct lol
@theavengers01 Bot alert. Stop being an NPC. If you want to, idk, change someone's opinion then maybe engage with what other people say? But you don't care, do you? You don't care about "protecting female spaces". You just like to be edgy little bot
Still a tragic story. I can only think of one movie with a trans theme that has a happy ending. "Boy meets Girl" which is a real sweet rom com. Need more like that.
donny/richard is bisexual just btw!! its a big part of his self acceptance journey with his masculinity and he tells his parents in one of my favorite scenes
Hey Samantha. You've helped me learn a lot about the trans community and what being trans is like. But more importantly you've helped me realise my own gender identity and my mum is even taking me to my first consultation next week! Thanks for everything girlie! 💖 Can't wait to see what you make next! 🏳️⚧️
Not related to the video, but can I just say, Samantha, that you are a beautiful person! You are such an inspiring woman and everyone (trans or not) should look up to you.
Martha reminded me of my fat, aggressive and bipolar mother so much... She always hated and abused me in every way imaginable, I had to move far away after high school or she would have killed me... It has been 14 years now. I don't miss her. I still have nightmares.
This video convinced me to watch the show which I hadn't noticed before. I just started it so I didn't see the monologue yet but seeing the original was very moving. Toxic masculinity is bad for everyone but especially men and I think Richard ( bi-Icon lol ) did a great job with his work internally and with the show from what i've seen of him.
After watching and listening to your wonderful review about this show I had to watch every episode right away and yes it is a compelling story, amazingly true, dealing with many relevant issues concerning sexuality, gender disphoria, dating as a Trans Person, passing after gender reassignment surgery ... everything you said here is shown with thought , brutal truth at times and compassion. The actress who plays the Trans woman is absolutely gorgeous and an incredible actress. I really hope they find a way to create a season 2. Thanks for posting this great review of an amazingly well written and very well acted multiple episode show.💡♥️💥👏🏽🌠❗️
I’m a straight cismale who is currently in a 3 year relationship with a trans woman. I abandoned my toxic masculinity when I was a teenager and am in my 30s now. I also present as a stereotypical “alpha male.” I actually see a lot of problems with Donny and the show. I worry that an effort is made to connect Donny’s sexual assault as a reason for his attraction to Teri. Also I feel as his shame is never really addressed. The sexual assault has expanded his shame, but I feel like it isn’t the root. The toxic masculinity is never addressed. Donny values what others think of him, and he doesn’t overcome it.
@@SeinIshamiado men (especially young), without knowing, essentially create the ideology of masculine performance. Their masculinity is tied to performing for other men. Even more introverted, and or less masculine men can do this. As a straight man I found this weird getting older. I didn’t finish the series thinking Donny was done performing.
@kazikek2674 Yeah, but the problem is too that so many guys don't wanna be seen as anything other than straight? It becomes an unhealthy toxic standard and function. I literally saw a video where a guy was trying to hand out a flower to men who came into a smoke shop and you should have seen how some of the guys were acting. it was ludicrous. Most of them threatening violence or "I'm not gay" "I ain't no betch" really sad.
@kaylie_dq I'm not transphobic, I'm trans. That was the word we used when I was young. The word transgender wasn't in common use then, and most of us didn't see it as having the negative implications it now has. I use the terms interchangeably for myself, but I use only transgender for others. Especially for younger folks as the word has fallen out of use and for non binary folks as transsexual would never have applied to them. It applies to folks who transition from one binary gender to another. For me, when I was young, transsexual was the goal. It was the word I looked up in the card catalog at the library to see if they had gotten anything new in. It was the word that let me know I wasn't alone in the world. There was a name for people like me. There was a community of people like me. I worked hard to get here, lost so much along the way list so many. But I'm here. A proud transsexual woman. So you can take your accusations of transphobia and point them somewhere else, friend. Cause it ain't me.
@@kaylie_dqdont dictate another persons identity. she said shes old meaning she was surrounded in the popularity and when the term transsexual was a norm, its not transphobic if a trans person self identifies, its only questionable if you refer to another trans person that way without asking if they're okay with that term
Definitely started to work with my Monkey, so that I can live how I want. Which has not only made me much happier but has allowed me to let go of the toxic masculinity that I held for so long and be the woman I am. I’ve never been happier, even on bad days I’m still way happier than when I tried to ignore both the monkey and my true self.
hi samantha! it's alyssa ♥️ i always enjoy this type of content of yours since i'm also a communication graduate :) to more of these!!! also, have you heard of "i saw the tv glow"? it's a horror film and idk if you also love watching horror films but there's also a trans representation in it! (and an ost made by caroline polachek!) you could check some letterboxd reviews if you want to know more about the film. it's showing in us theaters rn and as someone that's outside of us and therefore couldn't watch it, it would be nice if you would make a video about it. please please please. but ofc if it's possible with you. hope you had a pleasant day today xoxo
Truly thank you for this video❤️ I have seen the show beforehand and loved it aswell. I am now going to watch it again right after😂 The way you put together the messages the creator said is wonderful. I really needed to hear that. I have been struggling and feel like I am at a point where I could finally change something Thanks❤️
When I came out in the early 2000s, it was understood Transgender was used as an umbrella term and Transsexual was used for those transitioning. Are we not using transsexual anymore 😱
I feel like just Charlie is a good of a movie that represents someone that may not be so accepting at first but gradually transitions into acceptance I think I’ve seen that will be probably 20 times now it is so addicting
Sounds like an interesting show, with allot going on. As I've aged I think I've found a good balance between the toxic and being responsible to others. As much as the world is changed, there will always be a need for masculine men. I'm fine with were im at
Yes, some trans women use transexual to refer to themselves. For me it just means I want bottom surgery and I've always felt like I should have been born a girl.
I get that! I used to use the label transsexual, but I moved away from it because I noticed this tendency from myself and others to use the desire for SRS as a way to put ourselves above other trans people or say that we "deserved" our transition more. I think it definitely has its uses in medical contexts, but I think there's too much history associated with perpetually-online takes to colloquially use the word transsexual.
@@communistamanda I'm not using it to put myself above, just to signal my intentions with my transition. I didn't even start transitioning until I was 32 which is a long story.
I know I don't know you personally, but thought I'd say I'm very sorry to hear that you've had people say to you that 'they liked you but couldn't be with you cause of what society thinks'. Even if its understandable why they would feel that way, it doesn't change the fact that it's unpleasant to hear, and I hope that you're having better luck these days with people you are dating.
11:26 - It may not mean much now but just for the record, I've had a crush on you for a long time and I've openly admitted this to people who know you're trans, it's always baffled me why people care about what the rest of society thinks.
As a survivor of SA it was difficult to watch. I also found it difficult because they had to make the stalker a big woman . She’s an amazing actor with the whole psychotic narcissist thing down. Also as a trans woman myself… people scare me period .
I don’t know why you struggled with the stalker being a big woman but if it’s any help, the real life woman was bigger which is why they chose a plus size actress. Although if you just meant Martha is scary to you, yes I agree 😂
This video is great. The only issue I have with it is it is NOT toxic masculinity that stops men from dating Trans people it is preference. To call men toxic for not wanting to date trans people is just out right wrong
@@aaronpope8545 one of the points of the show was that he actually wanted to be with Teri but he was afraid and ashamed about it due to heteronormativity
it's wild to me that i listened to a whole radio segment that was talking about this show and how it was based on real events... not once did they mention anything about a trans woman. to hear these DJs tell it, the story was solely about a comedian who was assaulted by an older man and had a stalker. that was it.
I still need to watch this series. I did however watch both Piers Morgan shows on it and laughed hysterically (first at the real life Martha, then at Imarn 😂). The only thing I really know is it's allegedly based on true events, it stars the guy whose life it's based on, the Martha woman is an apparent stalker, and that it features a trans woman of whom is played by an actual trans actress
![YoungBoy Never Broke Again - Sneaking [Official Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/1ILUps2zDFU/mqdefault.jpg)
For clarification Richard is bisexual, not straight! There will be no bi-erasure here 😎
i love how you didn't wait 10 days until the next video, but i understand you want to make quality content.
For me there is a difference between being into trans women and being in love with a trans woman. It’s tough to go through trying to figure out what you really want.
It doesn’t matter to me what others think. If they find out they do. It’s shameful to me because if what I’ve been around but I have to live with it
I hate bi-erasers. They keep throwing them at my head
@@justsomeanimator Same, except people keep throwing gay-erasers at me
Will you retract your support for PDF files?
Teri was the most together well rounded character on the show. As an ally I appreciated that Teri also had her own tribe, a group of family and friends who were not here for Donnie taking their girl for granted.
Most depictions of transwomen tend to isolate them but Teri had a full regular life with people who loved and felt protective towards her.
The actress who played her was so pretty too 😊❤
I know we need more films to lecture us that biological women are bad
Which I love. I love when trans people are depicted as having supportive friends and family. When trans people are shown as loved and cared for. Yes showing trans struggles is important, but so is trans joy. Seeing representation of trans joy and love brings so much hope and empowers trans people to see a possible light at the end of the tunnel.
@@theavengers01 There are no biological women
@@theavengers01 Need a ciss-ue?
@@ericb9252 Sammy needs womby
Teri’s character arc was amazing. They fully humanised her and made her a well rounded and relatable heroine of the show. Normally in media trans people haven’t been written well at all so this was refreshing. She was a gem ❤
Looks like a fella
@@theavengers01 Okay? Nobody asked.
@@theavengers01 and you seem desperate.
You should try "Sense8" and "Dispatches From Elsewhere". I feel like they both have well-written transfem characters.
@@theavengers01who cares? This isn't the original insult u think it is. Anyone can look masculine or feminine, cis or not.
Just to clarify, Richard is openly bisexual. Baby Rainder is one of my new favorite shows. It is so good.
Trans women still don't have wombs
@@Encorezerolmao trans women know that. They know
It's also good to depict the raw reality of abusive cycle, trauma cycle, stalking rape unfiltered realistic. As having male friends who been victim of both abuse and rape (though this was female perpetrators) it shown that abuse and victims of such have no gender. It happens to the best of us it's awful. So i love this show
I also felt like Martha didn’t even call Teri a man because she knew for a fact she was a trans woman, she just wanted to insult her, and she used that because most women don’t like to be told that they look like a man, just my perception.
i noticed too
No Martha didn’t know she was just talking shit but she might’ve thought Teri looked like a man I heard women say that to each other before
That's a really interesting and nuanced observation.
i think it's cause of the humiliation aspect that most women don't like it for, like you're "not enough of a woman"
Yeah, o agree. Toxic femininity behavior as well was fully addressed
The dad calling Teri a transsexual seemed to me, like a joke about him being old and a bit out of touch 😅 but still well meaning like you said
I'm curious if there's like a Bechdel test for trans representation. Seems pretty case-by-case.
Like The Danish Girl wasn't ideal (played by straight actor Eddie Redmayne who seems to get every role in Hollywood) but it was still pretty good rep for the time (i.e. 9 years ago).
He is so supportive and understanding about everything. Also all the yelling at Martha shows him being caring in an intense way. I love that kind of character.
The partner of a trans person needs guts. It's not only whats society in general thinks about trans folks like us, it's also the curiosity of so many friends, for example for our sex lives. I never heard anybody asking a hetero couple about how they are having sex, for example. Several people asked us. Anyways, my partner stands 100% behind me and everybody, that doesn't do that, is NOT the right partner. Good luck to you Samantha!
I get what you’re saying but people don’t ask hetero couples that because they already know the answer. But a couple with a trans person in it can still be hetero but I know what you meant you meant a man and a woman
@@velvetvulpix Our combi is trans woman/cis woman, maybe it would be different if I'd be with a man.
@leandrahonegger3914
Tr*ns woma.. is a male...
Watching Baby Reindeer really hit close to home for me. I identify as a straight man and have a life experience I want to share. Please be supportive.
A few years ago, I got very close to this woman whom I didn't know was trans. We were kind of going out, but didn't really label it. When it started getting more serious, she pushed me away, explained she was trans, and told me I wouldn't be happy with her. It was immensely confusing. I spent some time figuring out how I felt, what it meant for me, if I was ready to face everything that came with that. A few weeks later, I worked up the courage to tell her that it didn't matter and that I loved her the way she was. It was genuine. I really meant it. I got rejected hard, though.
I found out through our conversations that she knew I was into her for a long while and was just keeping me around for validation. It was devastating... Made me question a lot of things about my self-worth, sexuality, and masculinity. To make matters worse, I didn't really feel I could talk about it to anyone, so I didn't for a very long time and it turned into serious depression. On the one hand, I promised her I wouldn't tell anyone we knew about her being trans; on the other, I felt immense shame at admitting to my close friends and family just what I was going through...
I eventually talked about it to my parents and some of my close friends. It was absolutely terrifying.They took it well, though. I'm now working all of that out through therapy. It is getting less difficult to accept and talk about. I am glad Baby Reindeer opened the conversation about men's experiences with trans women and overcoming toxic masculinity.
Anyway, I am posting this here because I feel like I need all the support I can get. Please be kind ❤
Happy you felt comfortable to share!!! I hope you find woman of your dreams who sees you as the man of hers!
I'm so sorry that this happened to you and hope that you have a good journey of healing and finding love ❤️
Thank you for commenting on this and being susceptible to vulnerability by opening up & sharing your story....
I think that despite taking that risk of doing so, you also shed light on the unique experiences of certain straight men who are more prone to sensitivity and empathy, and are more of the mindset of unconditional love, romance and sentimental intimacy when engaging in dating activities; yet they may have had toxic experiences with individuals who are members of a minority, and/or are part of a historically marginalized community.
Toxic is toxic...trauma is trauma...but in that same vein, love is love! The beauty of life around you via validation and reaffirmation of your self-worth through a rekindling of your inner-self, is what I think, the key to your own sustained happiness. As another fellow straight-man (both biologically & gender-identifying), I'm sending much love to u bro!!👊🙌
The representation on this movie is so refreshing because it is so real and shows real struggles
And Terri is SO FLESHED OUT. Like she’s such a dynamic character that feels three dimensional and isn’t flattened to just “love interest” as Samantha said. And I think that that’s also what makes it so good
Yes the struggle to pretend to menstruate haha
@@Encorezero Like you struggle to lie about your girlfriend in Canada?
@@Encorezero nobody is pretending to menstruate, nobody that's taken seriously by the trans community, at least.
This is a strawman argument. Just because you've seen somebody who self identifies as trans claiming to menstruate despite being unable to does not mean every trans woman does so.
@@De_Selby way to play defense. Queen bee Samanthas been exposed. That no womb having pdf file
As a 40 yo trans woman, you said a lot of things I need to reflect on about myself. Thank you, I don’t think I could have come to these reflective positions without this video.
i'm definitely going to have to watch this show. even from this review, it seems like it's going to be a very good resource for not only straight men and trans women struggling with unhealthy masculinity, but also for all of those that are struggling to understand what society really means when we say "unhealthy masculinity."
Yes the millions of straight men who want women who can't have kids
It's perfect for saying real women bad
@@Encorezero Trans women are women
@@ericb9252 second rate though. No man is thinking Kim Petras over Beyonce
@@Encorezero That's false
I loved this series. I loved Terri, and i cried so much during the scene with Donny and his parents.
So many emotions
Remembering now the way the show depicted his relationship with Teri - the show never tries to argue that he is in the right for treating Teri the way he did. Not reporting her assault by Martha, stepping off the train, lying about his name and job - he was ashamed of these things and the show makes them a gut punch revelation that he is carrying like an open wound. He isn’t making excuses and deflecting the harm his avoidance is causing. It’s his story and his point of view so he could very easily have viewed things like this as ‘it’s fine I did this because it makes sense’. The story informs us why he is making bad, hurtful, self sabotaging choices. It doesn’t crucify him, it doesn’t vindicate him. She isn’t an object in his story that he’s responding to, she’s a person he felt safe with in a world that made him feel unsafe. His lack of communication isn’t aggrevating because it’s clear to us that he is processing and doesn’t actually fully understand his own feelings and behaviour due to the trauma going unaddressed.
It’s a tragedy
This is so true to life for men who are genuinely attracted to transwomen (and not just chasers). My trauma also led to experimentation and questioning in a highly toxic Southern family, which is one of the reasons I don't really have anything to do with them anymore. I was told I would be disowned if I was gay, which I eventually threw in my Dad's face when I revealed what had happened to me and how it had warped my sexuality in ways I never asked for. Thankfully, I called his bluff, but I've still never felt like I could date the type of women that I am truly attracted to. This extends not only to transwomen, but non-binary as well. I am so glad this type of media is finally entering the collective consciousness, because there are so many men out there that want to pursue relationships with transwomen but have no representation or modeling for how to go about it and no idea who to talk to either. Hopefully this will spark a lot of conversations that need to be had in our culture.
Hey Man. I used to be in a similar situation to you, with my dad essentially telling me he will always love me as long as I am not gay... Glad to hear IT worked out for you and stay strong. Eventually society will progress past the need to shame MEN for being seen as anything less than straight.
BABE WAKE UP THE QUEEN HAS POSTED 👑 🙏🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥
Less than 1% of her subscriber base has watched the video. Dead channel.
Queen of diminishing views 3k in 3 hours 😂
@@Encorezero You keep being jealous
@@ericb9252 I'm actually watching her downfall
@@ericb9252 Channel is dead
Love your content!
I'm a straight demisexual straight man and in my teens and until recently, I lived in a very conservative catholic country in the south of Europe and even if my parents were mostly open and tolerant, I still got that toxic masculinity imprinted into my monkey brain. I wore clothes I didn't like to assert my masculinity (more classic than I would like), had cut my hair short because when I was younger and had long hair, people would make fun of me and call me a girl.
Now, I'm 45 and back in my home-country of Switzerland and I have long hair and wear black t-shirt and skinny black jeans, I let my beard run wild (doesn't mean unkept) and I don't give a flying feck if people still judge me. Now, I laugh when people are surprised I'm a dude and have such good hair. It's not like women have exclusivity on that!? XD
As an aroace nonbinary straight man, you do you king! Rock that long hair
Watching this show and his relationship with Teri broke me heart, because they were showing me in the show how good they were for each other, how at ease. How they were in love and could be so happy together. I knew the tension of the show would make things come to a head, and it very clearly showed how Donny’s personal sexual trauma and ongoing stress was the obstacle, not Teri being trans. It was heartbreaking that he didn’t know how to communicate it to her. And he wasn’t lashing out or blaming her
Please please please more of this! I loved learning a new way to look at the world, the behind the scenes/nitty gritty of how to do the analysis alongside your usual dead on takes! Also hi to your dog!!!
I've heard a lot of the talk about baby reindeer, regarding the stalker and sexual assualt. I'm glad that there is trans representation - I'm also glad that none of the topical, controversial parts of the show involved someone being transgender. This is the first I'm hearing about the character, which might be sad in the fact that they deserve more recognition, but at least that's not "why" it's controversial. It's hard to hear anything in the media about trangender people without it immediately having a discrimination bias😢
Teri was super cool. The only thing that felt kinda weird for me at first was that Doni actively searched for a trans woman to date. Idk how to interpret this. Also him being bisexual was really important for his character development and i loved the way they portrayed him coming in terms with his sexuality (especially with all his sexual trauma and stuff). But even if he was straight i believe that we shouldn't just focus on letting straight men know they are still straight if dating trans women. I know that it's super important for trans women safety first and foremost but imo we should also erase the whole shame about being non straight at the same time if we want things to really improve.
Honestly the overall shame related to being perceived as less than straight for what you are attracted to is a big deal. For some reason, people (well, MEN, mainly) are still worried something will 'make them gay'.
If you're a cis straight man, and you date a trans woman, you're still straight.
If you're a cis bi man, and you date a trans woman, you're not straight, but you're still dating a woman.
Simple as that, I don't get what's so complicated about that, you're still a man, dating a woman, who's only attracted to women, cis or not.
It looked Sus at first, but you see in episode five that he's engaging in hypersexuality across the board to cope with his trauma. I don't think the trans dating site was the only one he used. The others were probably just not shown.
Little piece of info you may have missed Sam. Richard Gadd identifies as bisexual.
I loved the show. I felt like Teri was the most relatable trans character I have ever seen, and I’ve gone through a lot of what she did in her relationship with the main character.
The show DOES perpetuate the stereotype, that if you’re a man attracted to a trans woman, you’re bisexual in some way. But since it’s a true story, and it’s Gadd’s experience, I’ll ignore it.
One of the most accurate moments in the show, was when Terri asks Gadd how he identifies sexually, and when he says bisexual, Teri is very obviously guarded, and asks “what makes you bi?”
A LOT of straight men, who have no attraction to men, but do date trans women, think they’re bisexual. Because dating trans women means you’re not straight… right? So her guarded response, was so accurate to reality, and it’s a conversation I’ve had myself a few times
I think he was referring to the fact that he hooked up with men following his assault? But didn’t want to share that part with her because he didn’t want to admit to the assault. That’s how I saw it but I could be missing something.
@@djaktak no like if you actually look up Richard Gadd, he identifies as bisexual. And in his speech where he opens up about the assault, he talks about coming to terms with not being straight
If you look up Samantha Lux you see her defend MAPS
@@theavengers01 OK guys I looked this up. This guy is spreading lies.
Samantha Lux has not defended pdf files.
There was a professor who's literally working to prevent child abuse, who wrote a thesis about those who have attractions towards children, but do not act upon it, and are trying to be better.
In that thesis, the professor referred to these people as MAPs. It caused a stir in the college campus they were working in, causing them to be fired. They were later hired by another college, to do more research in order to prevent child abuse.
They were not a pdf file themselves, they were working to prevent child abuse. These people are misrepresenting them AND Samantha.
The name of the professor is Allyn Walker if anybody is curious and wants to do research themselves.
@@De_Selby I find it so sad that people are calling Allyn a p*** because the type of work they're doing is so important. recognizing that people can be this way and NOT offend is an important step toward eliminating child abuse in the future. it shows that just because someone has a feeling doesn't mean they have to act on that feeling.
Thanks for your take on Baby Reindeer, particularly the handling of trans issues. I had read a comment online (not here) by someone that implied that the show was problematic because it was fatphobic and transphobic. I watched the show and I didn't perceive that at all, so I found your review reassuring!
That speech was very powerful and relevant to me personally. Thankyou for finding it and including it!
It's my favourite representation of a trans person that I've ever seen in media tbh
One thing this show really did show me as a trans man dating a cis man is when donny has his breakdown on stage and is like "i met a trans woman recently" and my partners respone was "why did he say trans its literally not relevant" showed yh hes a good one.
I just loved every second where Terri was on screen. Specially the calling out scenes.
I did laugh with the "good luck with the transexual". He is being supportive in an outdated way. I love that kind of moment.
Also, the talk about her in my family ended up being about her being from Mexico. They were happy about seeing someone from Latin America.
I hope this guy's story inspires other men to understand that there's strength in vulnerability.
Hi Samantha!❤ I’m a trans (non binary) kid/teen 🏳️⚧️ and I love your content! I’m leaving this comment because I was early and I’m never early😂ps your dog is very cute❤
You are not Trans, you are a confused Bisexual. Real Trans people like myself and Blaire see not (non binary nonsense).
Do you think the dog partakes in Samantha's liaisons?
They claim they have periods now lol
@@Encorezeroyapper 🥱
There's no such thing as transkids.
I thought the show was shocking in it's portrayal of the psychological horror of stalking. Having it flipped onto a man is something you don't see portrayed the way it was here. As for Teri, she was my favorite character as the confidence she had in herself seemed to be the baseline she expected from everyone around her. As always, I love your perspective!
holy cow ive never been this early to a samantha lux vid so happy about this
Same
Next week how Sam can get pregnant lol
@@Encorezero Arnold Schwarzenegger did it 30 years ago. Ancient technology to get literally anyone pregnant that can't naturally.
@@Encorezero dude, you left 56 comments on a single video?
@@De_Selby you just defended the worst type of behaviour
I know this was just posted but I am ftm and was extremely excited about the trans character in this series.
Sadly I had ALOT of unexpected triggers throughout the show and am currently trying to get over them so I am not in the place to watch your video yet.
I am interested in your opinions tho so I will defo be watching this at a later point in time.
The series was really well done overall but it hit to close to home at some points ❤ I hope anyone who watched the series is doing okay around the subject involved and I'm sending everyone happy loving positive vibes ❤❤
Grow up
@@Encorezero what?
@@Encorezero Nah, you're the one who needs to grow up. You clearly have nothing better to do than to reply to almost every comment talking sh*t. So, pathetic. Get a life.
@@Encorezero wtf rude
You'll acting like Sam is queen bee yet she actively campaigns for MAPs
just gonna go ahead and start watching this show immediately after this video!!
I loved listening to your honest opinion on the struggles cishet men face when it comes to overcoming the toxic views they’ve been force fed their entire lives. It was not only sympathetic but also incredibly accurate. Kudos to you girl, I’m definitely, 1000% subscribing.
I died laughing when his dad waved him goodbye and said "Good luck with the transsexual!" I'm sad but also glad they didn't end up together because she is way too good for him lol.
Yeah, she's like so amazing
I loved Teri. She was easily my favourite character. Such a beautiful person inside and out. The fact that Richard got anyone who saw her on screen to truly see her how he saw her is so so impressive. But also the actress who played her was fabulous in her role.
The queen has posted let us all rejoice 💗
Glad you covered this, I was really glad that the show was showing this main romantic interest with a trans girl not as a side piece fling thing but actually story of developing love between them, but I didn’t really like how they handled the idea of dating her. Almost like she was only an interest to him because of his trauma, or something. Im glad they gave Terri a happy ending and didn’t do the whole “dating trans person=different sexuality” thing
I cried at that same scene in Click, I shan't be silent
I wonder if Sam can carry full term
@@Encorezero You must be the baby she's carrying.
I'm so glad that shows like Baby Reindeer exist. Everyone has their own traumas, so to see how someone made it through their own is very powerful ♥️
(On an aside, nail polish was the first thing I did to push back on expectations around me. Seemed scary at the time, but glad I did it for me.)
I have been watching your videos for a while and been a huge fan, but this video in particular, maybe its because I'm a transman and masculinity is a constant battleground for me- this video was really powerful. Thanks for always putting out great content.
I love this account. All your takes are nuanced and well thought out, and you approach them from all angles it seems. Just a truly nuanced and fair take whenever I watch your videos.
your hair is literally so cute
After the balding correction
@@Encorezero her hair is very cute.
@@Encorezeroshe never had balding
Great analysis, thanks for sharing your experience as always!
It hit a bit at the end when Donny sees Terry going out with her new boyfriend, but it’s lovely to see her boundaries paying off in finding a guy that will actually show her off as she deserves.
hi samantha!! happy monday :)
I think Sam is expecting
@@Encorezero Expecting you to come up with better material. WEAK!
I'm also so glad they used a real trans actor. We need real representation!!
I also love her confidence like "either accept me fully or this won't work out"
Great video! I really liked how you weighed the different perspectives on Teri and Donny, from within, from each other, and from society and their pasts. I gotta say though it’s probably a good idea to get the show creator / lead actor’s name correct lol
Hell yea, another Samantha Lux Video
Next one is a lecture of maternity ward decorum
@theavengers01
Bot alert. Stop being an NPC. If you want to, idk, change someone's opinion then maybe engage with what other people say?
But you don't care, do you? You don't care about "protecting female spaces". You just like to be edgy little bot
Lol women bad again
@@Encorezero Projection.
Still a tragic story. I can only think of one movie with a trans theme that has a happy ending. "Boy meets Girl" which is a real sweet rom com. Need more like that.
I just finished this show yesterday, I loved how human Teri felt compared to other trans representation in media.
donny/richard is bisexual just btw!! its a big part of his self acceptance journey with his masculinity and he tells his parents in one of my favorite scenes
Netflix has gotta sponsor you babe cause I went and binged the show over this video
They should pay you for your review because now I have to watch the show
Didn't expect the show to be that intense
I loved Teri! I kept talking to the screen and telling Donny to treat her better.
I AM SO EARLY BUT I WAS WAITING FOR YOU TO COVER THIS SHOW
Im surprised the show didnt say white people bad more
@@theavengers01 Begone lil boy
Early like Sam's menopause lol
@@theavengers01 ???? you really want to find a problem huh
@@Encorezero she's not in early menopause! hope that helped
Love you Samantha, you are a gem on ytube and help our community so much with your content
Hey Samantha. You've helped me learn a lot about the trans community and what being trans is like. But more importantly you've helped me realise my own gender identity and my mum is even taking me to my first consultation next week! Thanks for everything girlie! 💖 Can't wait to see what you make next! 🏳️⚧️
Not related to the video, but can I just say, Samantha, that you are a beautiful person! You are such an inspiring woman and everyone (trans or not) should look up to you.
Martha reminded me of my fat, aggressive and bipolar mother so much... She always hated and abused me in every way imaginable, I had to move far away after high school or she would have killed me... It has been 14 years now. I don't miss her. I still have nightmares.
i’m so sorry u had to go through that
This video convinced me to watch the show which I hadn't noticed before. I just started it so I didn't see the monologue yet but seeing the original was very moving. Toxic masculinity is bad for everyone but especially men and I think Richard ( bi-Icon lol ) did a great job with his work internally and with the show from what i've seen of him.
Girl has single-handedly convinced me to watch Baby Reindeer
'Girl'
Lol all she says in 'men bad am I right' or 'women bad am I right'
@@Encorezero You need help
@@ericb9252groomer
@@Encorezero sounds like maybe you just don’t have to brain capacity to understand what she’s saying
After watching and listening to your wonderful review about this show I had to watch every episode right away and yes it is a compelling story, amazingly true, dealing with many relevant issues concerning sexuality, gender disphoria, dating as a Trans Person, passing after gender reassignment surgery ... everything you said here is shown with thought , brutal truth at times and compassion. The actress who plays the Trans woman is absolutely gorgeous and an incredible actress. I really hope they find a way to create a season 2. Thanks for posting this great review of an amazingly well written and very well acted multiple episode show.💡♥️💥👏🏽🌠❗️
I haven't seen it yet, but I'll be putting it on my watch list now.
Teri is my favorite character I’ve seen in a long time. She’s the voice of reason in a truly fucked up situation.
Watched this on your recommendation. It was great!!!!
Literally crying! Thank you! 🙏 ❤❤❤
I know finally another film that says biological women bad
@@theavengers01 OFFS! What!? Go outside, get a hobby.
@@theavengers01 No one asked your cis opinion
Haha
I’m a straight cismale who is currently in a 3 year relationship with a trans woman. I abandoned my toxic masculinity when I was a teenager and am in my 30s now. I also present as a stereotypical “alpha male.”
I actually see a lot of problems with Donny and the show. I worry that an effort is made to connect Donny’s sexual assault as a reason for his attraction to Teri. Also I feel as his shame is never really addressed. The sexual assault has expanded his shame, but I feel like it isn’t the root. The toxic masculinity is never addressed. Donny values what others think of him, and he doesn’t overcome it.
I wish more guys were open minded like you....
@@SeinIshamiado men (especially young), without knowing, essentially create the ideology of masculine performance. Their masculinity is tied to performing for other men. Even more introverted, and or less masculine men can do this. As a straight man I found this weird getting older. I didn’t finish the series thinking Donny was done performing.
@jordandomingue9310 I recommend you finish it-
@@SeinIshamiadoit will happen with Time, I feel. Essentially society needs to stop shaming MEN for being perceived as something less than straight.
@kazikek2674 Yeah, but the problem is too that so many guys don't wanna be seen as anything other than straight? It becomes an unhealthy toxic standard and function. I literally saw a video where a guy was trying to hand out a flower to men who came into a smoke shop and you should have seen how some of the guys were acting. it was ludicrous. Most of them threatening violence or "I'm not gay" "I ain't no betch" really sad.
I haven't watched baby reindeer yet, but I'm intrigued now! And, I do refer to myself as transsexual as often as transgender, but I'm an old.
Being old isnt an excuse to be transphobic tho
@kaylie_dq I'm not transphobic, I'm trans. That was the word we used when I was young. The word transgender wasn't in common use then, and most of us didn't see it as having the negative implications it now has. I use the terms interchangeably for myself, but I use only transgender for others. Especially for younger folks as the word has fallen out of use and for non binary folks as transsexual would never have applied to them. It applies to folks who transition from one binary gender to another. For me, when I was young, transsexual was the goal. It was the word I looked up in the card catalog at the library to see if they had gotten anything new in. It was the word that let me know I wasn't alone in the world. There was a name for people like me. There was a community of people like me. I worked hard to get here, lost so much along the way list so many. But I'm here. A proud transsexual woman. So you can take your accusations of transphobia and point them somewhere else, friend. Cause it ain't me.
@@kaylie_dqdont dictate another persons identity. she said shes old meaning she was surrounded in the popularity and when the term transsexual was a norm, its not transphobic if a trans person self identifies, its only questionable if you refer to another trans person that way without asking if they're okay with that term
Definitely started to work with my Monkey, so that I can live how I want. Which has not only made me much happier but has allowed me to let go of the toxic masculinity that I held for so long and be the woman I am. I’ve never been happier, even on bad days I’m still way happier than when I tried to ignore both the monkey and my true self.
Do you have a womb?
I LOVE your media analysis videos!!!
Thank you for the recommendation!!!! I've heard about this previously but not in depth. I don't have Netflix but when I do I'll check it out 😊
hi samantha! it's alyssa ♥️ i always enjoy this type of content of yours since i'm also a communication graduate :) to more of these!!! also, have you heard of "i saw the tv glow"? it's a horror film and idk if you also love watching horror films but there's also a trans representation in it! (and an ost made by caroline polachek!) you could check some letterboxd reviews if you want to know more about the film. it's showing in us theaters rn and as someone that's outside of us and therefore couldn't watch it, it would be nice if you would make a video about it. please please please. but ofc if it's possible with you. hope you had a pleasant day today xoxo
The trans character felt like any other human being. that's the trick to representation
YOU LOOK STUNNING 💕💚
I’m a guy and trans people don’t bother me because I see them as humans and they deserve the same respect as everyone else in this world❤❤❤❤❤🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶
Surprise late night Monday Samantha Lux video???
I know I love these lectures on womanhood from someone not born a woman
@@theavengers01 Samantha is a woman. Why are you here?
Bless her she's been on her time of the month so has been pre occupied
@@Encorezero She needs to hurry up and block you both
@@ericb9252 She doesnt have eggs lol
This is a truly beautiful video. TYSVM!
Loved this show and was really happy to see you talk about it!!
Truly thank you for this video❤️ I have seen the show beforehand and loved it aswell. I am now going to watch it again right after😂 The way you put together the messages the creator said is wonderful. I really needed to hear that. I have been struggling and feel like I am at a point where I could finally change something
Thanks❤️
Here at nine minutes??? LOVE YOU QUEEN
Lmao y'all hoping one day Sammy will have the capacity to have kiddies lol
When I came out in the early 2000s, it was understood Transgender was used as an umbrella term and Transsexual was used for those transitioning. Are we not using transsexual anymore 😱
I still use Transsexual
Transsexual is still often used by those older trans people WHO underwent transition, but some perceive it as weighted and out of date now.
You can use it if you want
@@The_10th_Doctor. But I want to stay hip with the lingo, and also don't want to offend anyone for something I can change.
@@Beeframenchan it’s definitely still used around the trans punk scene if that’s your vibe
Such a cute doggo!
Like Sam, the dog cant birth humans
“I seen it happen don’t let it be you” 😂😂😂😂😂
you just convinced me to watch this show, downloading the episode on netflix right now!!
theavengers01 is really your fan, Samantha, they already commented 4 times 😍🥰❗
Fan behavior seriously!!
And it keeps commenting over and over finding issues to be mad at. Its acting hypocritical too
I have loved all the movies you've talked abt Samantha!!!!!!! (Minus the transphobic ones ofc!!!)
I feel like just Charlie is a good of a movie that represents someone that may not be so accepting at first but gradually transitions into acceptance I think I’ve seen that will be probably 20 times now it is so addicting
Sounds like an interesting show, with allot going on. As I've aged I think I've found a good balance between the toxic and being responsible to others. As much as the world is changed, there will always be a need for masculine men. I'm fine with were im at
Yes, some trans women use transexual to refer to themselves. For me it just means I want bottom surgery and I've always felt like I should have been born a girl.
I get that! I used to use the label transsexual, but I moved away from it because I noticed this tendency from myself and others to use the desire for SRS as a way to put ourselves above other trans people or say that we "deserved" our transition more. I think it definitely has its uses in medical contexts, but I think there's too much history associated with perpetually-online takes to colloquially use the word transsexual.
@@communistamanda I'm not using it to put myself above, just to signal my intentions with my transition. I didn't even start transitioning until I was 32 which is a long story.
Apologies, I didn't mean to imply that you were! I was just sharing my experiences w/ the label transsexual. @@JeannieLove
@@communistamanda just wanted to address it before someone actually makes an accusing reply
As a 64 year old post op Transsexual Woman that’s the term I’ve always used, transitioned when I was 23, my hubby and I binge watched the show
I know I don't know you personally, but thought I'd say I'm very sorry to hear that you've had people say to you that 'they liked you but couldn't be with you cause of what society thinks'. Even if its understandable why they would feel that way, it doesn't change the fact that it's unpleasant to hear, and I hope that you're having better luck these days with people you are dating.
11:26 - It may not mean much now but just for the record, I've had a crush on you for a long time and I've openly admitted this to people who know you're trans, it's always baffled me why people care about what the rest of society thinks.
As a survivor of SA it was difficult to watch. I also found it difficult because they had to make the stalker a big woman . She’s an amazing actor with the whole psychotic narcissist thing down.
Also as a trans woman myself… people scare me period .
Can Samantha have babies?
@@theavengers01 Babies are overrated. So noisy and messy. Have kindly elderly people instead.
@@theavengers01 unless she's allergic or something, she can have fur babies!
I don’t know why you struggled with the stalker being a big woman but if it’s any help, the real life woman was bigger which is why they chose a plus size actress. Although if you just meant Martha is scary to you, yes I agree 😂
@@hj5520yeah, the stalking is based on real life so the actress is gonna have to resemble his ex-stalker
Great show! Love the video Sam! Tysm! Pretty angel! ❤
This video is great. The only issue I have with it is it is NOT toxic masculinity that stops men from dating Trans people it is preference. To call men toxic for not wanting to date trans people is just out right wrong
uhm.. what this preference is based on?
@badkarma3828 they don't want to date trans people and that is fair. I don't want to date women or trans people because I like men
I think that would depend on the specific reason why they don't want to date them, wouldn't it?
@kazikek2674 not one bit. Why do people need to be given a reason? No means no right? Isn't that pretty much the entire point of the show?
@@aaronpope8545 one of the points of the show was that he actually wanted to be with Teri but he was afraid and ashamed about it due to heteronormativity
This is your best work btw. Truely amazing how you put this together. Still not sure, if i can mentally watch the show.
🥲 thanks for watching ❤
i just closed my laptop on the last episode and this was the first vid i saw on YT :P
it's wild to me that i listened to a whole radio segment that was talking about this show and how it was based on real events... not once did they mention anything about a trans woman. to hear these DJs tell it, the story was solely about a comedian who was assaulted by an older man and had a stalker. that was it.
I still need to watch this series. I did however watch both Piers Morgan shows on it and laughed hysterically (first at the real life Martha, then at Imarn 😂). The only thing I really know is it's allegedly based on true events, it stars the guy whose life it's based on, the Martha woman is an apparent stalker, and that it features a trans woman of whom is played by an actual trans actress
I keep hearing about this show but I didn't know it went this deep, definitely need to check it out now
When he left her on the train my heart broke.
Terri was my favorite character in that show. I swear she was the only one with any sense