Best of Tom Segura & Theo Von - PART 1
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- Опубликовано: 19 сен 2021
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The funniest moments between Theo Von and Tom Segura. Clips are from This Past Weekend episode 213.
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“He was semi-pro, like he beat people up in the area” 😆😆😆😆
😂
Just a gay dude beating ass lmao 🤣 😂
Lmfao Albundy s***
Lol. Locally grown ass whopping
Active advertising 😂
Tom just goes along with the crazy shit Theo says and doesn’t even change his tone, it’s hilarious 🤣
'Carry on...' haha! He does it to Bert too.
@@Jaikay1 xD
Cause he knows Theos about to say some crazy shit, I love it
Burnt syndrome. Just agree with crazy.
He works with Bert .... Best training
Theo "dude we had this one guy" von
I read that comment as he said that, for the 9th time lmao love Theo
It’s Louisiana man, everybody is that one guy
Always right lol "we had this one guy" Theo said to EVERY statement lol
“the other day i heard him say carry the 40, he’s done man” i fucking died 😂
Killed me, out of nowhere
Killed me with that bit.
He just said that and I burst out laughing in front of 4 ppl at a silent train station
Non us person here, what was he supposed to say? I dont understand the reference. unless he meant .50 caliber, was that it?
@@sv676 it's in reference to a typical math formula but it's a bad sign that it got to that large of a number, "he's done"
Everyone says Theo is making everything up, until he actually shows you a horrific scar lol
I am from and in Louisiana, he ain’t making it up.
@Killer Killer B THIS! %100. There are separate worlds that exist completely unknown to the average person. You got to be deep within it sometimes to catch on to it lol
that's the strategy lol say a bunch of shit that's iffy then finally prove one of them and they all become true 🤣
approximately 97% of everything theo says publicly is made up from whole cloth. He is a twisted genius.
4:00 Theo describing sex with older people as like holding a bag of someone and they’re inside of it. I laughed so hard.
Was sooooo funny
He said "HE" too
"Besides when I came out of my mother?" was batshit hilarious
holy shit. the whole bit had me crying
but a brilliant way of describing a frail person with no muscle left, another reason to keep lifting/yoga etc. I couldn't even laugh at how visceral and real it was. Half of the time I honestly think Theo doesn't even try, he just is comedy.
LMFAO
"whats the biggest age gap"
"you mean besides when I came out of my mother"
wtf bro like just wtf
That was insane This killed me too
Absolutely the most wtf shit he could’ve said. 😂😂😂😂
When his father put him in his mother😂🤷🏼♂️
Tom was super nonchalant too lmao
Lmao who talks like that!
It took me years of being into comedy to like Theo, now he's one of my top favorites. His analogies make no sense and perfect sense at the same time, I always end up dying laughing.
"I heard him say carry the 40" is one of the smartest ways to call someone dumb I've heard in a while
I'm right there with you. I kind of slept on Theo at first, only seeing some brief clips here and there. He's really grown on me the last few months, after giving him more of a chance
It took me awhile too. I watched part of his stand up special & kinda hated it. Podcasts really let him shine.
There's no way that as a child Theo Von wasn't told the phrase:
"You're the reason we have warning labels."
Truly believe he’s now the modern day norm in his own form. A joke within a joke. “Comedy is surprises, if they don’t laugh at your joke, that’s hilarious itself”. Rip norm
Theo forsure steals catalytic converter‘s after the show
I'm thinking about starting doing that as a grass roots business.
No. He steals them during the opener. After the show he does a meet and greet and people leave.
It’s like watching Tom try to have have a conversation with one of Christina’s tiktoks
Except Tom is actually laughing
If that were true Tom would have rolled his eyes multiple times and started laying around the table till Theo was done.
"I heard him one time say carry the 40" - that shit killed me for some reason.
Theo looks like he carries WD-40 in his pocket
Like a sample pack, little pouch? Or like a full can? Or both?
@@OnPointFirearms definitely a half full can
yea he sprays it on his elbows and knees to loosen up dem joints
If not on him, definitely in his truck
For sniffin'...
The only reason I believe most of Theo's "we had a guy once" stories is because I grew up in a WEIRD ass little town and a few of the characters I knew are hard to believe. We have a well known guy named "Suzie" or SuzeDawg who would run up and down the tourist areas of the town barking like a dog and chasing tourists around. We wouldn't even say whats up to him, everyone who knew him would just throw out a small dog bark and he would bark back. My hometown is an old mining town that recently re opened the mines and he ended up stealing ammonium nitrate and a blasting cap and setting off a crude bomb in the mountains above the tourist area of our town. The explosion was so loud the sound traveled through the entire town and up the main canyon road. Because of that tourists no longer felt safe and stopped visitng our town until the city was forced to install cctv cameras allllll over the place. A crazy tweaker dude who barks like a dog was so batshit it forced a small town to spend thousands of dollars on cameras just to make tourists feel safe. Lol they never tried to arrest him or discipline him and everyone knew who was responsible. They just turned a blind eye lol. He is still running around town, last time i seen him he was playing hacky sack in the middle of the highway. And the cherry on top of everything is that Doug Stanhope decided to open a compound and live there, of all places. Wouldn't be surprised if he knows SuzeDawg.
Billy "Conforto" was a real dude. His last name was Mince. Lots of articles online about his family's history as Boxers.
@@betteryou7hanme yeah I know I've seen his obituary being posted as a link in some comments. I'm just talking about Theos stories of his hometown in general. Some of them sound far fetched until you remember he came from a small town.
@@pnwlife8593 comedian
Open a compound huh? But aren't compounds meant to be secure? Is this some kind of sick joke from stanhope?
R u from Bisby AZ?
“Bill Belichick with a wig”
That’s a fucking nightmare.
*nightMERE*
miss trenchbolt shit
I cried
No days off
😂😂😂😂😂
“Drinking aloe vera under a wagon”
Theo is the master of talking top shelf dribble and that really works with the podcast format
But is he a punter AND a dribbler?
This seems erroneous hahahaha
@@fredpj8222 I had to google erroneous after he said it and it was the perfect word ahaha
mark kavanagh beers soon
@@BOKtober that Doctorate you have is honorary huh
“It got weird at the end”
“Yeah it got weird at the end in court”💀💀💀
that cut from “do you like thin crust?” to “i wouldn’t wanna sleep in the same bed with my mom” had me so confused, i was dying
Shout out to Theo always giving Mexicans love. He’s invited to the carne asadas.
Sometimes I don't think even Theo knows where his train of thought is leading.
Rode straight into an embankment
“I mean I know it’s a probably decent number, it’s probably something Brendan Schaub couldn’t count to”
Bro 😂 so true
I mean, that could be any number above 9
"He was a gay fire fi- no fist fighter" lol.
I love how Tom won’t stop Theo when he’s talking crazy. Just let’s it flow so he can go off and get out his thoughts. We thank you for that Tom.
Had to acknowledge TheoGate there at the end. Respect, jean.
This felt like watching Theo take Tom on a wild bike ride through a forest, except they were riding along in a ditch instead of on the footpath.
*embankment*
@@Jacob-sb3su*exactly*
Tom absolutely thought Theo was talking 48 as the age difference not just the lady's age.
100% facts lol I just watched that part as scrolling past your comment lol
If Theo didn't normally have an odder cadence of speech I would think he did that on purpose but that sounded p casual for him
@@MacktasticSlick_ that’s how RUclips works. It’s great
Theo said " he was like 9 years older" i don't think he was talking about a lady 😶
As a lifelong Texan, when Theo said “Safe Mexican”, San Antonio immediately sprang into my mind
Yeah we pretty mild here lol
Depends which side of town and or neighborhood...Arena district, East Terrell Hills...Pecan Valley...there are some shit holes you don't want to be in after dark....but the vast majority of the 75% of hispanics in town are great people...i married one of them.
@@90whatever what’s his name 😏
@@90whatever girl y’all exaggerate it’s not that bad lol. Way better than some of these Houston slums 😂
Tom Segura Joey Diaz and Theo Von need a consistent podcast, holy shit.
Only combo better than this is Theo with Bobby Lee
I don't know, Tom and Bert is pretty damn funny
@@JeffWalshPhotography you’re right way funnier
No theo and chris!!
These are cut together so well that i wasn't watching while listening and it all sounds like one conversation going
"Carry the 40" almost gave me a heart attack 😂
Just started liking Theo. I learned this is common. Most don't understand/like him at first but always end up loving him.
I’m one of the few who got him immediately. I’m also from a small, crazy southern town w plenty of stories
Tom and Theo is like a dream I've had. The conversation is so surreal. 😂
Flowers for Algernon🤣 Theo is a joke genius
“kinda weird towards the end… in court” sent me😂😂😂
She was like I’m gonna take a shower.. and I thou- ‘though she was gonna say shit?’ .. no 😂 that was golden. Same with the ‘why was it bad cause you fell in love?’
“Carry the 40” 😂
“I heard him say carry the 40, I was like he’s done..”
I’m fucking dead Lmfao
I'm glad there is a comedian out there that has a weird ass sense of humor like me.
Agreed.
"Were you gonna say hundreds?" Holds on that shit eating grin 🤣🤣🤣
“I’m talking like with a pistol on an animals back” Hahahaha!
Theo is basically my favorite human 😂😂
Theo Von, the king of catchphrases.
"Why was I there?
I was snorting dolphin dandruff, and doin dope. Lookin for the LORD, my brotha."
“Like a black me.. which is fine!” Got me 😂
6:20 My favorite part “it looks like Bill Belichick”. ….Theo “wooooow”. Lmao
“I know it’s probably a decent number. It’s probably something Brendan Schaub couldn’t count to” bro💀💀💀💀
“You’re talking to someone who was molested brother” lmao too real
tom is an absolute beast of an interviewer. he controlled every aspect of the conversation
Tom literally drives ever conversation straight into a damn *embankment* .
I LOVE THESE VIDEO'S !! WELL DONE!
I have such a crush on Theo 😂 he’s so freakin funny!
Saaaaame. And his heart is epic
Man I know they both have so many podcasts, but they're so funny together and would make a great podcast.
They move done so many podcasts and yet I've never heard any of these stories. So great
I love the Joe Rogan call out. Hes totally like that and its hilarious!
One of the greatest podcast videos ever. I come rewatch it when I’m missing the earlier days when people didn’t know each other
Ending with the bomb!
Theo von is a story teller but adds in his own analogies and personal experiences and it just hits the funny bone 😂
Bill bellecheck in a wig killed me
He said, "I want to be a safe Mexican." My first thought was, Al Madrigal 🤣
How Tom kept his composure to that "Besides when I came out of my mother" joke is beyond me - so funny
I went to the comedy store and heard of Theo for the first time in my life when I ditched a week long pickup artist class in Hollywood. He was 1 away from the last comedian and the best of the night. Him, Bobby Lee, and an Asian chick that has a Netflix special now are the only ones I remember. Thankfully, I got the front row seat since the door people pitied me cause I looked homeless and lost. Theo roasted everyone in the front row but me. I was a little disappointed not gonna lie.
You should have announced that you were in town to go to a week long pickup class. Someone would have definitely roasted you.
@@dylliedutch oh for sure.
You were too easy of a target.
15:05 for life papa KILLED me.
It got weird towards the end in Court LMAO
Theo and Tom click like magic
"The other day I herd him say carry the 40, I knew he was done after that" pure gold, shit had me dead
Literally 22 minutes of Tom rolling with Theo's intrusive thoughts.
Carry the 40!?!? Howd he hold it together I almost choked 🤣
The other day i heard him say ‘carry the 40’ 😂😂😂😂😂😂👍
"What's the deal with airplane peanuts?"
I love how theo literally pictures the story as a movie in his head and tries to add his own brain script ex: she was about to say I'm gonna take a shower, theo cuts in and says she's gonna take a shit with a smile lol
That part really had me
The part about Brendon using play school math tool …..the best.
Big shout out, 21 days in a row. Hope you are seeing a bump
5:09 “it was kinda great at the beginning then got kinda weird towards the end”
Theo: yeah kinda weird towards the end.. in court 😂😂😂
Props to the editor. Some of the cuts like, "do you like thin crust?".."i dont think i could take a nap with my mom" lmao
“Probably a number brenden shaw couldn’t count to” I’m still dying! 😂
I don’t think Tom understood most of Theo’s analogies but I respect he was able to atleast let Theo go. When Burr and Theo got together of course Bill was just relentlessly unwilling to play along with Theos almost childlike humor 😂 All of these guys are the absolute best in their own unique ways lmao!!
Tom and Christina are fascinated with the insane and the crazy.
@@thewickedzaku so was Howard stern. Remember the “wack pack”? Ppl are fascinated with ppl that are vastly different and living much different lifes. It’s interesting.
@@thewickedzaku that’s why freak shows were successful
Joke WRLD stay posting bangers, thank you bro🙏🔥
these videos are so well done! subscribed!
"We had this guy in our town...he's dead now." Everyone of Theo's stories.
This was amazing to listen to stoned the lack of transitions makes this wonderful to follow.
Tom Seguras spanish is extremely well I’m impressed! he has a very good accent
Best ending clip ever. Well done.
Does that candle ever melt down 😂
He called a Calzone a Sherman Tank lmao
Favorite two comedians alive!
16 to 45 holy shit
Theo Von making a Flowers for Algernon joke 😂
Jesus Christ, what a reference.
"One time I heard him say 'Carry the _forty_ ' ." Bro that has got to be one of the top 106 funniest things I have ever heard lmfaooo
I heard him say carry the 40 and I lost it. Only there. And it’s all so damned funny. Theo is the funniest person alive man.
Wait wait the sigma chi handshake part had me in tears.
"...and he might BE alive" 😂
Ayyyoooo “Carry the 40” 😂😭😂
Damn let's go this is only pt1 of them
I always sing your juice outro lol. Mad props to you for the videos. Ans keeping juice on my mind ♡
Currently in the comments looking for a full song link lol
@@hunterreside50 i gotchu fam
ruclips.net/video/84Xpdw92KFo/видео.html
JOKEWRLD is a saint
“She’s a ‘go get it’ type of lady” 😂
This is comedy gold from start to finish
Tom: "do you like thin crust pizza?"
Theo:"I wouldn't wanna sleep in the same bed as my mom"
Damn 25k subs. Well done 👏
"Carry the 40." LMAO
Tom : "Anyone that agreed to..Did she cut you?"
You can tell Tom is trying hard not to insult Theo, even in a joking manner.
Dude 5 mins in I’m dying laughing
The wall of comedians in Simpsons form is hilarious!!! Joe Rogan with the Onnit shirt lmfao !!!