Gabby Petito Foundation: gabbypetitofou... Donate to support murdered and missing indigenous women: www.nativewome... My Socials Tiktok: 3quirky5u Insta: ashleynorton625
Literally the "anyone who does something bad has to be a psychopath" thing made me dislike these true crime communities. It always felt that they were saying that the only people who kill are mentally ill or have brain damage. Saying that you could never kill anyone because you're okay in the head is both untrue and villainizes the mentally ill. Especially those with a personality disorder or any other mental illness that's stereotypically "scary".
Legit. I haven't been diagnosed, but borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder were on my differential diagnosis list before I had to stop going to my psychiatrist due to moving. I was the first one my friend trusted alone with her newborn baby. I was the one who my coworker trusted to drive him home from surgery. I'm not a monster because childhood neglect and abuse altered my brain chemistry and made me mentally ill. Most mentally ill people, even the ones with the "scary" illnessess are only a danger to themselves, nobody else.
The way tiktok treats mental health has genuinely made me unable to speak about my actual diagnosis to anyone in my age range. It’s either people that have self diagnosed themselves with so many things they have no idea what going through treatment is like or why it’s needed, or people that think everyone is faking it for tiktok. 🙃 it’s taken away what confidence I had in myself and how hard I’m working with my care team and I’m just hiding again.
Yeah when you look at what happened the probability of what happened was he might have killed her accidentally or was so angry that he killed her while having no self control. Nobody really knows what happened but I don’t think he planned to kill her. And thats also something that happens too. But its not the mentally ill that are capable of doing so it’s generally people who lack the ability of emotionally regulating themselves. And you don’t have to be mentally ill to be disregulated it could just be that you’ve never learnt the skill especially if your parents weren’t regulating themselves and teaching you how to.
I really appreciate your assertion that terrible things are often done by otherwise “normal” people, it’s so important for us to actually take preventative steps against crime by looking at it as a social issue and not a novel where the bad guy has an underlying personality disorder or is literally possessed and those are the only things that could possibly explain all of their behavior. The desire to dramatize these things soothes us into thinking we are safer because we are nothing “like that”, and we think that we would notice if people “like that” were near us in real life. Crime doesn’t stop when you double down on punishment and demonization and degradation of humans, but humans who have proper access to a safe and stable environment, health care, mental health services, and community aid in general are statistically far less likely to commit crimes. I’m not even done with the video while I’m typing this I’m just passionate and wanted you to know that I can literally *feel* genuine empathy and understanding coming from you through my screen rn and it is so beautiful to witness lol
This is what really gets me in so many true crime channels. They are often so sure they know all the answers and refer to whoever they’ve decided did it (proven or not) as monsters. Sometimes normal people do terrible things. Plus there’s always this thread of conspiracy like they’re the true detective that knows the answer but it was covered up.
Dude I literally had to argue with SEVERAL people at once who were dead ass convinced the astroworld thing was a planned sacrifice like it was actually pretty surreal how many people were legitimately debating that shit like theres any merit to it at all 😭
I'm only a few minutes in but giiiirrrlll I can relate so hard. I used to binge true crime content on the daily. Now that I'm going to school to be an investigator I can't bring myself to watch it anymore. Social media "detectives" cause more harm than good and I don't know if they realize it or care.
everything you said about the Gabby Petito case was so extremely true. i've rarely heard anyone else talk about how people that do bad things can just be everyday people, not psychopaths/criminal masterminds, and not even necessarily people who have been doing bad things in every facet of their life......it's hard to talk about because no one wants to bother humanizing criminals, especially people that do really terrible things, and people will accuse you of defending them. to me, it has never been about that - it's just illustrating that these situations do not fit into the perfect boxes that people have in their heads; it's not a tv show or a podcast or a movie, it's real life, and real life is really complicated.
I know this is a 2 year old comment but I just have to say that this is so well put. So many people in the “true crime” sphere act like acknowledging the complex humanity of someone who has committed a terrible crime is the same thing as defending them, when really it’s just a morally neutral, objective fact. Even if you believe that someone is so terrible that they “deserve” to be dehumanized (which I don’t but I can understand why some do), it’s just… inaccurate. It skews your perception of every single thing that person does to fit a narrow idea of who they are, and it’s just a bad habit for people to get into of seeing other people this way (which goes for the everyone is a narcissist/APD/psychopath crowd, too).
There’s a really great fiction book, Devil House, by John Darnielle (lead singer of the Mountain Goats) that just… COMPLETELY changed the way I look at the entire genre of true crime and the ethics of it. Like there’s a single chapter written in second person about the mother of a victim that like… made me immediately stop engaging with true crime unless it’s done by professionals like Keith Morrison or is just a news update.
the whole astroworld “satanic” things made me SO MAD! i remember ranting about with my friend about how angry i was that people kept spinning these people’s death into some cult sacrifice. like it’s so unfair to the family of the people who died, imagine going online and seeing your child, sister, brother, etc has been blown up into this “cult sacrifice” theory. like how disgusting is that? it’s crazy to see how disillusioned people have gotten with the rise in true crime, even i had to get myself out of that “everything is a conspiracy” mindset when i used to be younger and watched a lot of people like shane dawson
the juxtaposition of videos on my fyp honestly can become exhausting. i had to stop spending time on the app as much because i would be watching a funny video and then the next six would be something to do with violence, death, true crime, etc and it became so mentally exhausting.
You’re definitely right about the bald white dude with a beard thing. I’m married to a Brian who fits that exact description but would never hurt a fly and I’m also a gabi (so that’s a rather unfortunate coincidence-my father in law even made a rather distasteful joke about not going camping during the time this was unfolding). I think people come up with conspiracy theories like this to make sense of the unthinkable but lose their sensitivity to the fact that at the end of the day two young people are dead and one was murdered and that’s incredibly sad. I think in order to cope there’s a certain amount of cognitive dissonance that needs to occur but unfortunately it isn’t always approached with the most tact or care.
Yes, if one wants to approach true crime they should at least do it respectfully (i.e. Kendall Rae, who is always respectful and tries to involve the victim's family)
@@missygonzales4790 I gave her a chance. While she is charismatic and does not outwardly try to be disrespectful, she is. She's incredibly unprofessional too.
had to do a double take bc i was like. there's no way she has a skeleton with a hawaiian shirt on just out of frame. first of all it should be in frame and second of all what?
your perspective is so clear and well thought out! i don’t think i’ve ever fully approached true crime in this way before. so excited to watch more or your videos!!
I find true crime fascinating but most true crime related content is trash. almost all coverage is incredibly sensationalised and pushes the "look at this scary sicko monster!" narrative. it creates the impression that "criminals" are a separate class of just inherently evil people, instead of people shaped by a plethora of factors like society, culture, economic status. religion, upbringing and mental health issues. on the other hand we, the listener/viewer are the normal and good people entirely removed from the capacity to cause harm. it is a compelling narrative because the reality is incredibly complex and most of us prefer an easy answer, that's why people love conspiracy theories.
Commenting for the algorithm!! Love seeing your growth lately 🥰 you deserve it and 10x more. Also, I can’t agree with you more!! the weird excitement from telling the stories, and blatant boundary crossing with off the wall conspiracies drive me CRAZY. I used to love it (and still enjoy some creators like Brittany Sarian(sp?) and Stephanie Harlow) but it has gotten way out of hand.
I hate how these humans are treated like they’re characters in a tv show. And media in general just milks these horrible events for their own popularity and clicks. Its interesting how obsessed we are with tragic cases. Tbh I know medical experts sometimes are unempathetic but they have to be cus otherwise they wouldn’t be able to do their jobs if they were too empathetic and affected by what they’ve seen. Well yeah they are affected, but they generally have some sort of personality that is unempathetic so it allows them to do their job without breaking them emotionally. But for the rest of us whats our deal, why do we obsess over these cases and just dehumanize the very real incidents happening.
I like watching true crime content, but just from some creators here on youtube that focus on the victims, their lives, their families, etc. and not so much on the perpetrators and the gory details of the crime itself. Tik Tok just doesn't seem like the right platform for this type of content
I've noticed just how True Crime is talked about on tiktok (though this is the case for youtube and podcasts too) talking about cases like it's some juicy gossip and the comments will be full of random stuff like "first" "part 2?" that aren't important. I know if a youtuber will mispronounce a word there will be a bunch of comments pointing it out and that's really what you're focused on? The censoring of words has gotten ridiculous. I hate the word "unalive" that they came up with and they will use emojis in place of words in captions/description. If you have to censor so heavily than maybe you should do true crime videos on another platform.
The true crime social media stuff is really gross a lot of times. I don’t like people making wild guess thinking this is some kooky murder mystery game when they are on going cases. The victims’ family having to deal with people bothering them demanding info from them. These families aren’t public figures by choice they are trying to find their love ones and they are heartbroken but yeah your podcasts comes first. People need to learn some decorum. People need to also stop pointing the finger at random people or worst love ones of the family like in the Idaho case blaming the ex boyfriend. He had love that girl basically his whole life they were about to get back together but now he is being hounded by the internet saying he butcher her with no proof. I shuttered to think how much worst events &!witch hunt for the Boston Bbooomber. They are not characters. This is not a game . This is real life and real emotion.
This was a cathartic video because it expresses pretty much all my frustration with about 90% of true crime content and comments. Problematic aspects of true crime like people coming after the victims for being imperfect, armchair detectives accusing innocent people, publishing autopsy photos, those things at least tend to get criticized a fair amount. But not that many people are interested in talking about how we dehumanize and oversimplify criminals, and even most of the better/more respectable true crime channels are prone to doing this. I think it’s bad for our brains to get into the habit of viewing people like this. No matter how terrible someone is, they’re a complex human being with a multifaceted personality - that’s not good or bad in and of itself, it’s just a part of being human.
Say what you will about the “For You” page but it led me here and whether or not you read this I hope you are having a great day. You’ve made mine better.
"I used to love it -- and then I went to law school..." applies to so many things, problematic (true crime) or not (reading).
very relatable
Law and Order is a frequent thing I've heard people ditch
If it took going to law school to learn that true crime was a problem, you aren’t that bright.
Yup
@@cococock2418 If you replied to this comment with that when you clearly meant to reply to the content creator then you’re the one who isn’t bright.
Literally the "anyone who does something bad has to be a psychopath" thing made me dislike these true crime communities. It always felt that they were saying that the only people who kill are mentally ill or have brain damage. Saying that you could never kill anyone because you're okay in the head is both untrue and villainizes the mentally ill. Especially those with a personality disorder or any other mental illness that's stereotypically "scary".
Legit. I haven't been diagnosed, but borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder were on my differential diagnosis list before I had to stop going to my psychiatrist due to moving. I was the first one my friend trusted alone with her newborn baby. I was the one who my coworker trusted to drive him home from surgery. I'm not a monster because childhood neglect and abuse altered my brain chemistry and made me mentally ill. Most mentally ill people, even the ones with the "scary" illnessess are only a danger to themselves, nobody else.
The way tiktok treats mental health has genuinely made me unable to speak about my actual diagnosis to anyone in my age range. It’s either people that have self diagnosed themselves with so many things they have no idea what going through treatment is like or why it’s needed, or people that think everyone is faking it for tiktok. 🙃 it’s taken away what confidence I had in myself and how hard I’m working with my care team and I’m just hiding again.
Yeah when you look at what happened the probability of what happened was he might have killed her accidentally or was so angry that he killed her while having no self control. Nobody really knows what happened but I don’t think he planned to kill her. And thats also something that happens too. But its not the mentally ill that are capable of doing so it’s generally people who lack the ability of emotionally regulating themselves. And you don’t have to be mentally ill to be disregulated it could just be that you’ve never learnt the skill especially if your parents weren’t regulating themselves and teaching you how to.
I really appreciate your assertion that terrible things are often done by otherwise “normal” people, it’s so important for us to actually take preventative steps against crime by looking at it as a social issue and not a novel where the bad guy has an underlying personality disorder or is literally possessed and those are the only things that could possibly explain all of their behavior. The desire to dramatize these things soothes us into thinking we are safer because we are nothing “like that”, and we think that we would notice if people “like that” were near us in real life. Crime doesn’t stop when you double down on punishment and demonization and degradation of humans, but humans who have proper access to a safe and stable environment, health care, mental health services, and community aid in general are statistically far less likely to commit crimes. I’m not even done with the video while I’m typing this I’m just passionate and wanted you to know that I can literally *feel* genuine empathy and understanding coming from you through my screen rn and it is so beautiful to witness lol
This is what really gets me in so many true crime channels. They are often so sure they know all the answers and refer to whoever they’ve decided did it (proven or not) as monsters. Sometimes normal people do terrible things.
Plus there’s always this thread of conspiracy like they’re the true detective that knows the answer but it was covered up.
Dude I literally had to argue with SEVERAL people at once who were dead ass convinced the astroworld thing was a planned sacrifice like it was actually pretty surreal how many people were legitimately debating that shit like theres any merit to it at all 😭
do u have proof it’s not
@@missygonzales4790 here you are again. It's called common sense. Heard of it ?
Shit i still comment asking ppl what happened to all those lawsuits he was totally gonna lose lol
I'm only a few minutes in but giiiirrrlll I can relate so hard. I used to binge true crime content on the daily. Now that I'm going to school to be an investigator I can't bring myself to watch it anymore. Social media "detectives" cause more harm than good and I don't know if they realize it or care.
everything you said about the Gabby Petito case was so extremely true. i've rarely heard anyone else talk about how people that do bad things can just be everyday people, not psychopaths/criminal masterminds, and not even necessarily people who have been doing bad things in every facet of their life......it's hard to talk about because no one wants to bother humanizing criminals, especially people that do really terrible things, and people will accuse you of defending them. to me, it has never been about that - it's just illustrating that these situations do not fit into the perfect boxes that people have in their heads; it's not a tv show or a podcast or a movie, it's real life, and real life is really complicated.
I know this is a 2 year old comment but I just have to say that this is so well put. So many people in the “true crime” sphere act like acknowledging the complex humanity of someone who has committed a terrible crime is the same thing as defending them, when really it’s just a morally neutral, objective fact. Even if you believe that someone is so terrible that they “deserve” to be dehumanized (which I don’t but I can understand why some do), it’s just… inaccurate. It skews your perception of every single thing that person does to fit a narrow idea of who they are, and it’s just a bad habit for people to get into of seeing other people this way (which goes for the everyone is a narcissist/APD/psychopath crowd, too).
There’s a really great fiction book, Devil House, by John Darnielle (lead singer of the Mountain Goats) that just… COMPLETELY changed the way I look at the entire genre of true crime and the ethics of it. Like there’s a single chapter written in second person about the mother of a victim that like… made me immediately stop engaging with true crime unless it’s done by professionals like Keith Morrison or is just a news update.
love your thoughts on this, especially about people trying to turn people who do bad things into inhuman monsters for our own comfort.
the whole astroworld “satanic” things made me SO MAD! i remember ranting about with my friend about how angry i was that people kept spinning these people’s death into some cult sacrifice. like it’s so unfair to the family of the people who died, imagine going online and seeing your child, sister, brother, etc has been blown up into this “cult sacrifice” theory. like how disgusting is that? it’s crazy to see how disillusioned people have gotten with the rise in true crime, even i had to get myself out of that “everything is a conspiracy” mindset when i used to be younger and watched a lot of people like shane dawson
the juxtaposition of videos on my fyp honestly can become exhausting. i had to stop spending time on the app as much because i would be watching a funny video and then the next six would be something to do with violence, death, true crime, etc and it became so mentally exhausting.
You’re definitely right about the bald white dude with a beard thing. I’m married to a Brian who fits that exact description but would never hurt a fly and I’m also a gabi (so that’s a rather unfortunate coincidence-my father in law even made a rather distasteful joke about not going camping during the time this was unfolding). I think people come up with conspiracy theories like this to make sense of the unthinkable but lose their sensitivity to the fact that at the end of the day two young people are dead and one was murdered and that’s incredibly sad. I think in order to cope there’s a certain amount of cognitive dissonance that needs to occur but unfortunately it isn’t always approached with the most tact or care.
honestly i think people like bailey sarian are so incredibly weird and disrespectful doing makeup while gossiping about real crimes
She talks about these crimes like she’s Wendy Williams too lol the whole thing feels disturbingly vapid.
Yes, if one wants to approach true crime they should at least do it respectfully (i.e. Kendall Rae, who is always respectful and tries to involve the victim's family)
AGREEEEEEE. everyone defends her SO hard. it's weird.
she’s great tho she’s not disrespectful
@@missygonzales4790 I gave her a chance. While she is charismatic and does not outwardly try to be disrespectful, she is. She's incredibly unprofessional too.
had to do a double take bc i was like. there's no way she has a skeleton with a hawaiian shirt on just out of frame. first of all it should be in frame and second of all what?
peppermint vodka tastes like someone put cool mint mouthwash into a bottle of vodka
i usually love anything peppermint but peppermint vodka missed the mark. badly. its existence should be considered a hate crime
your perspective is so clear and well thought out! i don’t think i’ve ever fully approached true crime in this way before. so excited to watch more or your videos!!
I find true crime fascinating but most true crime related content is trash. almost all coverage is incredibly sensationalised and pushes the "look at this scary sicko monster!" narrative. it creates the impression that "criminals" are a separate class of just inherently evil people, instead of people shaped by a plethora of factors like society, culture, economic status. religion, upbringing and mental health issues. on the other hand we, the listener/viewer are the normal and good people entirely removed from the capacity to cause harm. it is a compelling narrative because the reality is incredibly complex and most of us prefer an easy answer, that's why people love conspiracy theories.
Commenting for the algorithm!! Love seeing your growth lately 🥰 you deserve it and 10x more. Also, I can’t agree with you more!! the weird excitement from telling the stories, and blatant boundary crossing with off the wall conspiracies drive me CRAZY. I used to love it (and still enjoy some creators like Brittany Sarian(sp?) and Stephanie Harlow) but it has gotten way out of hand.
I hate how these humans are treated like they’re characters in a tv show. And media in general just milks these horrible events for their own popularity and clicks. Its interesting how obsessed we are with tragic cases. Tbh I know medical experts sometimes are unempathetic but they have to be cus otherwise they wouldn’t be able to do their jobs if they were too empathetic and affected by what they’ve seen. Well yeah they are affected, but they generally have some sort of personality that is unempathetic so it allows them to do their job without breaking them emotionally. But for the rest of us whats our deal, why do we obsess over these cases and just dehumanize the very real incidents happening.
I like watching true crime content, but just from some creators here on youtube that focus on the victims, their lives, their families, etc. and not so much on the perpetrators and the gory details of the crime itself. Tik Tok just doesn't seem like the right platform for this type of content
I agree. There’s lot of good true crime creators. But none show on my fyp these days
I've noticed just how True Crime is talked about on tiktok (though this is the case for youtube and podcasts too) talking about cases like it's some juicy gossip and the comments will be full of random stuff like "first" "part 2?" that aren't important. I know if a youtuber will mispronounce a word there will be a bunch of comments pointing it out and that's really what you're focused on?
The censoring of words has gotten ridiculous. I hate the word "unalive" that they came up with and they will use emojis in place of words in captions/description. If you have to censor so heavily than maybe you should do true crime videos on another platform.
I’m so happy I found your channel :)
The true crime social media stuff is really gross a lot of times. I don’t like people making wild guess thinking this is some kooky murder mystery game when they are on going cases. The victims’ family having to deal with people bothering them demanding info from them. These families aren’t public figures by choice they are trying to find their love ones and they are heartbroken but yeah your podcasts comes first. People need to learn some decorum. People need to also stop pointing the finger at random people or worst love ones of the family like in the Idaho case blaming the ex boyfriend. He had love that girl basically his whole life they were about to get back together but now he is being hounded by the internet saying he butcher her with no proof.
I shuttered to think how much worst events &!witch hunt for the Boston Bbooomber.
They are not characters. This is not a game . This is real life and real emotion.
Only just found your channel now! Can’t believe it hasn’t blown up yet 😵 love the topics u talk about :)
Thank you so much!!
good video!!! but (constructively + w love) pls make all ur audio levels the same, some parts hurt my ears lol
Yeah I'm totally out of the loop, I had to look up these cases so I knew what the heck you were talking about lol
This was a cathartic video because it expresses pretty much all my frustration with about 90% of true crime content and comments. Problematic aspects of true crime like people coming after the victims for being imperfect, armchair detectives accusing innocent people, publishing autopsy photos, those things at least tend to get criticized a fair amount. But not that many people are interested in talking about how we dehumanize and oversimplify criminals, and even most of the better/more respectable true crime channels are prone to doing this. I think it’s bad for our brains to get into the habit of viewing people like this. No matter how terrible someone is, they’re a complex human being with a multifaceted personality - that’s not good or bad in and of itself, it’s just a part of being human.
The fact that there is something called “Crime-Con” is so ridiculous.
💀💀 you holding the microphone that’s not on. 🤣🤣
I’ve never heard of the Gabby Petito case before this
Say what you will about the “For You” page but it led me here and whether or not you read this I hope you are having a great day.
You’ve made mine better.
It's all bread & circuses
I don’t use TT for crime documentary related info. (I have never thought the moniker of true crime made any sense… just say documentary ffs).
That Marie the cat graphic lol come on
I can only hope that the people who make these videos are young teens and will hopefully grow out of this.
I’m late but I’m here 🤠
💖💖💖
Your best work honestly
I joke, just working my way thru the catalogue, this is great tho don’t knock yourself
💕
I hope the world is more boring than I think
Okay I don’t want to see that Travis Scott video but the impression of it gives me no rest does anyone know what that is?
I like and we never discuss again