👌More videos can be found on this topic at: ruclips.net/p/PLcB3trehXswjBGCfG2vXNPf2yzLa1srxr&si=prl_ZH6QpgS-HyLf ❤️Self help activities and worksheets and concierge coaching with Dr. Snipes can be accessed at DocSnipes.com 👍Online Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certification
My husband went through surgeries and emotional neglect as an infant and then later the divorce of his parents when he was five. Splitting is exactly what I could call part of his behaviors towards me in our relationship any time he perceived me doing something like his mother. He's been able to get CBT and EMDR treatments that have allowed him to start to process his trauma, and it's saved our marriage.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
This is highly necessary right now. I study the cosmos and quantum physics as well as spirituality of indigenous cultures that didn’t have criminals or a jail. As we approach the nodes moving into Libra ( balance) and Aries (ego) we will feel the impact of unhealthy relationships. I hope Dawn gets a chance to reply to u. U took the words out my mouth.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
I like this take. Everything is contextual of course. I've seen splitting or split off described as something a bit different, in terms of dissociation and separating from reality or even breaking (splitting) off from your family of origin. Either way, all usually involve trauma.. your insight is priceless. Thanks!
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
@@sweetmunchkin6118 Means a lot. Improving my mental health after going through depression and anxiety disorders.Been doing a lot better since started following videos of this channel.Yes hoping the best for you also.Wishing you peace and good health❤
@@sweetmunchkin6118 Nobody has said such kind words to me. This conversation brought smile on my face and breeze of freshness in my mind.Such healthy conversations help mind to reenergize and feel better.Nothing much but wish the best for you and take care of yourself too.Thank you once again ! Have great years and life ahead. Looking forward to see you around here later on whenever possible ❤
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Questions I’ve been journaling about are ; How does forgiveness play a role in splitting by a partner ? No matter how many times they apologize and forgiveness is offered , repeat reenactments of splitting are highly likely to occur. How can the partner remain open after another round of splitting occurs ? It seems difficult to find a middle ground. My body clenches each time an episode occurs. Though I can forgive my body struggles to forget. What advice would possibly help to avoid closing off my heart? I really hurts to open up, become the fav person, next thing u know ,your the villain. In childhood intimacy wasn’t always a prerequisite for a healthy relationship however as an adult it’s essential to the relationship. Ladies I’m sure I’m not the only one who has asked this question. Relaxing is key to any form of intimacy however most people dealing with cptsd crave love and connection yet the fear of being hurt again closes the bodies natural desire for intimacy which leads to faking headaches, orgasms and denying the huge NO in the body to satisfy your partner. Otherwise if u say No over an extended period your likely to be blamed for withholding intimacy to maintain control or u get accused of being a narcissist or cheating. As women we’ve been programmed by society to believe we must keep our men satisfied or they’ll find satisfaction elsewhere. This is very toxic and traumatizing. Any feedback is appreciated.
Forgiveness can be a challenging process, especially when there are patterns of hurtful behavior and a repetition of negative cycles in a relationship. It's important to recognize that forgiveness doesn't mean accepting or excusing harmful actions. It's about finding a way to release yourself from the burden of anger and resentment, for your own well-being. Finding a middle ground in a relationship where splitting occurs can be difficult, and it's essential to address this issue with open and honest communication. Being vulnerable in a relationship can be scary, particularly when there is a fear of being hurt again. You mentioned that your body clenches with each episode, indicating the profound impact these experiences have on you. To avoid closing off your heart, it's crucial to prioritize self-care and set boundaries. Reflect on what you need in a relationship to feel safe and respected, and communicate those needs assertively to your partner. Trust and emotional safety are built gradually, and it's okay to take time to assess whether the relationship is genuinely nurturing and supportive of your well-being. Dealing with past trauma, such as Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD), can indeed impact one's ability to experience intimacy. In relationships, both partners should aim for mutual respect and understanding, rather than perpetuating harmful societal beliefs or gender roles. No one should feel pressured to meet unrealistic expectations or sacrifice their emotional well-being for the sake of others. Healthy relationships thrive on open communication, empathy, and a willingness to support each other's growth. Your feelings and experiences matter, and it's essential to prioritize your well-being and happiness. You can find videos on boundaries here: ruclips.net/user/DocSnipessearch?query=boundaries Videos on assertive communication here: ruclips.net/user/DocSnipessearch?query=communication This video will help you with forgiveness: ruclips.net/video/vGDrnOkVhlA/видео.html
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Why are psychologists so averse to giving any real kind of advice to the partner that's on the receiving end of the split? You go to the point of saying the splitter isn't even doing anything wrong?! They are straight up ABUSING their partner. Gaslighting, lying, screaming, baseless accusations, in a context where by your own admission you aren't even allowed to defend yourself, is straight up abuse. Absolutely bonkers that there is just no real advice for the target of the split out there, even among 'professionals'.
@@DocSnipes I have watched your other videos on this, and I'm sorry, but you don't. You aren't alone in this problem, what I'm saying is that there doesn't seem to be any genuine advice from psychologists for the spouse of someone with BPD, on how to navigate this, fully from the perspective of the spouse. All of the advice tends to be in the framework of the person with BPD; what they are experiencing, what is happening to them, and how all the people around them should craft their thinking around that. Do you really think there aren't mental health implications to dealing with someone that constantly is splitting on you? Mental health implications for the target of the split? Where the advice of just laying it at the feet of the BPD condition just doesn't work? It's not so easy to just bifurcate one's thinking and separate the piercing venom that is coming out of their mouth during a split, and pretend it doesn't hurt. Pretend it doesn't affect us. To just lay it at the feet of their BPD condition and not feel as though it's them that's actually saying these things. There are profound mental health consequences to this, to just taking it, to just being the punching bag year after year, and I haven't found a single psychologist yet that actually appreciates what it's like being on the receiving end of all of this - aside from the ones who say it's just not worth it to get into a relationship/marriage with someone with BPD. To just avoid it to begin with. Is that the answer? If you don't want to be a punching bag your whole life, getting utterly destroyed by the person who is supposed to love you, who you are supposed to feel safe with, just don't marry them to begin with?
@@MenOfVirtueyou are absolutely correct. Thank you so much for voicing that so clearly. I’ve spent years looking for the same answers for the same problems and only get those same responses.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
I kinda had a splitting event where I mainly saw my mom as the villain even after her remorseful acts. One thing I started to question was, "How many times would I have to get back at her for the numerous times she did it to me? Would it even make me feel good? A short time, maybe, but what then? I would be nearly torturing her for years on end, and no one will get any rest, and I wanted rest now."
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
@@SuziOkbagabir-l1m Dude. With all due respect... I am a Christian but vomiting bible verses is not the way to actually help convert. You can use it a reference sheet if people ask but I promise you that hardly any atheists will listen to you if you just do it that way.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Ive been through this, my ex husband has ptsd, his depression meds were decreased too quickly and he spiralled into major depressive episode. Im the enemy in his mind, he divorced me and he also has had periods of psychosis that ive witnessed. Its a nightmare. Thirty years married then he turned on me like a rabid dog.
I have bpd and am always splitting. I find it so difficult bc im usually in rational mind to protect muself from too many emotions amd preventing a nervous breakdown. I find listening to Wise mind meditation helps center me and I would recommend this to others including those without bpd
Thanks for watching the video and for sharing what helps you. I am sorry you are struggling with BPD. Have you watched the videos on BPD on the channel?
👌More videos can be found on this topic at ruclips.net/p/PLcB3trehXswhDimuZ6lD8yJL33aQMZN_A ❤️Self help activities and worksheets and concierge coaching with Dr. Snipes can be accessed at DocSnipes.com 👍Online Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certification
❤Thanks so much for your clear explanation of things. This is the first time I've heard the term "Splitting" though familiar with the concept. It sounds very similar to black & white (or polarized) thinking, a trait/behavior many people with narcissistic personality types display. Would you also compare this with projection? It seems like a similar thought process, or at least the same cause & effect. Our brains are so complex, I wish there was a magic pill to erase the negative impacts!
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Off topic, what do you call someone who can only exist while taking care of others but when they do anything for themselves they feel overwhelming guilt?
Thanks for watching the video. I would say they are codependent. Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ruclips.net/user/DocSnipessearch?query=codependency
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
What is it called when you are so upset that you just cannot take it and all of a sudden you just stop caring about anything that you were upset about, like you become ambivalent about the fact that your partner may be breaking up with you? Like from the most intense emotions you’ve ever felt almost like suicidal rage, to absolute ambivalence, even amusement over the situation?
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Is it still splitting if they really did something wrong [boundary violation] and you express it too them in lots of words? Seems like there's a lot of fine lines between just not putting up with bad behavior and blaming the victim
When addressing whether expressing a boundary violation in detail constitutes splitting, it's important to understand the concept of splitting and how it relates to boundary violations and communication. Splitting is a defense mechanism often seen in individuals with abandonment anxiety or insecure attachment. It involves viewing people or situations in all-or-nothing terms-either all good or all bad. This can be a protective behavior triggered by feelings of unsafety or fear of abandonment. Differentiating Splitting from Assertive Communication Context of the Behavior: Splitting: Typically occurs when someone feels threatened or unsafe, leading them to categorize the other person as entirely bad to protect themselves. Assertive Communication: Involves expressing feelings and boundaries clearly and respectfully, without resorting to all-or-nothing thinking. Intent and Emotional Regulation: Splitting: Often accompanied by intense emotional dysregulation, such as sudden anger or fear. Assertive Communication: Aims to address the issue calmly and constructively, focusing on specific behaviors rather than labeling the person as entirely bad. Outcome and Impact: Splitting: Can lead to feelings of guilt and walking on eggshells for both parties involved. Assertive Communication: Seeks to resolve the issue and maintain a healthy relationship dynamic by setting clear boundaries. Addressing Boundary Violations When someone violates your boundaries, it's crucial to communicate this assertively. Here are some steps to follow: Identify the Behavior: Clearly state what the boundary violation was. Express Your Feelings: Share how the violation made you feel. Set Clear Boundaries: Explain what you need to feel safe and respected in the relationship. Seek Resolution: Work together to find a solution that respects both parties' needs. Example of Assertive Communication Splitting Response: "You always disrespect my boundaries! You never care about my feelings!" Assertive Response: "When you went through my personal belongings without asking, I felt disrespected. I need you to respect my privacy and ask for permission before doing that in the future." By focusing on specific behaviors and expressing your feelings without resorting to all-or-nothing thinking, you can address boundary violations effectively without engaging in splitting. If you have any more questions or need further clarification, feel free to ask or use allceus.com/AskDocSnipes to learn how to set and maintain healthy boundaries.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Splitting is a psychological phenomenon often associated with personality disorders, particularly borderline personality disorder (BPD). It involves a person viewing themselves, others, or situations in extremes-either all good or all bad, with no middle ground. The frequency of splitting can vary widely among individuals and can be influenced by various factors, including stress, interpersonal conflicts, and individual coping mechanisms. While there isn't a specific number of times a person can split in one day, as it is highly individual, it's important to understand that for someone with a personality disorder prone to splitting, it can happen multiple times a day, especially during periods of high emotional turmoil or stress. If you or someone you know is struggling with splitting, it may be helpful to explore the underlying traumas and memories associated with this behavior. Therapy can be beneficial for individuals to explore their traumas and vulnerabilities and identify strategies for change. Grounding techniques, distress tolerance, and radical acceptance are important tools to restore a sense of safety and empowerment in the moment.
I feel like this describes what my teenage son has done to me. He used to be a funny curious affectionate kid but at about 13 he stopped talking to me. It got progressively worse and went from one word answers to being ignored and then being mocked for trying to start every day afresh bothering to try and talk. He's with my brother now because his hatred for me was so off the scale. He told me I was a bitch. I said why am I a bitch. He had nothing. Called me more names. But there's no reason, no ''you're a bitch because....'''. It's awful. I hope one day he values having a mother.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
I am sorry about the fact that your employer doesn’t understand splitting and that you are losing your job every week. I appreciate you watching the video.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
This information is for YOU to understand and learn from it so YOU can keep a job. The only common denominator in YOUR experience is YOU. If YOU lose a job every week, do YOU think all bosses are the same or is YOUR behaviour in every situation the same?
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My husband went through surgeries and emotional neglect as an infant and then later the divorce of his parents when he was five. Splitting is exactly what I could call part of his behaviors towards me in our relationship any time he perceived me doing something like his mother. He's been able to get CBT and EMDR treatments that have allowed him to start to process his trauma, and it's saved our marriage.
😊good for you 😊
That’s inspiring ❤️🙌🏽
I am glad it all worked out for you and your husband! Thanks for watching the video and for sharing
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
❤️❤️❤️
Can we address the stress and trauma experienced by people on the receiving end of abusive behavior of someone with BPD?
This is highly necessary right now. I study the cosmos and quantum physics as well as spirituality of indigenous cultures that didn’t have criminals or a jail. As we approach the nodes moving into Libra ( balance) and Aries (ego) we will feel the impact of unhealthy relationships. I hope Dawn gets a chance to reply to u. U took the words out my mouth.
Thank you for watching the video. I have added your request to my list of upcoming videos :)
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Yes and I disagree that there's nothing wrong with them. You don't act violently and say there's nothing wrong with them...
@@DocSnipes thank you
I like this take. Everything is contextual of course. I've seen splitting or split off described as something a bit different, in terms of dissociation and separating from reality or even breaking (splitting) off from your family of origin. Either way, all usually involve trauma.. your insight is priceless. Thanks!
You’re so welcome. Thank you for watching.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Good morning @Doc Snipes and everybody. Excited for the premiere. Hoping that everybody is going to have great day🌸❤
Good afternoon, Prat! Thank you so much for watching the video
@@sweetmunchkin6118 Thank you.
@@sweetmunchkin6118 Means a lot. Improving my mental health after going through depression and anxiety disorders.Been doing a lot better since started following videos of this channel.Yes hoping the best for you also.Wishing you peace and good health❤
@@sweetmunchkin6118 Nobody has said such kind words to me. This conversation brought smile on my face and breeze of freshness in my mind.Such healthy conversations help mind to reenergize and feel better.Nothing much but wish the best for you and take care of yourself too.Thank you once again ! Have great years and life ahead. Looking forward to see you around here later on whenever possible ❤
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
I wish I worked on this before it cost me one of the most important relationships of my life.
I am sorry splitting cost you the most important relationship in your life and I appreciate you watching the video
Questions I’ve been journaling about are ; How does forgiveness play a role in splitting by a partner ? No matter how many times they apologize and forgiveness is offered , repeat reenactments of splitting are highly likely to occur. How can the partner remain open after another round of splitting occurs ? It seems difficult to find a middle ground. My body clenches each time an episode occurs. Though I can forgive my body struggles to forget. What advice would possibly help to avoid closing off my heart? I really hurts to open up, become the fav person, next thing u know ,your the villain. In childhood intimacy wasn’t always a prerequisite for a healthy relationship however as an adult it’s essential to the relationship. Ladies I’m sure I’m not the only one who has asked this question. Relaxing is key to any form of intimacy however most people dealing with cptsd crave love and connection yet the fear of being hurt again closes the bodies natural desire for intimacy which leads to faking headaches, orgasms and denying the huge NO in the body to satisfy your partner. Otherwise if u say No over an extended period your likely to be blamed for withholding intimacy to maintain control or u get accused of being a narcissist or cheating. As women we’ve been programmed by society to believe we must keep our men satisfied or they’ll find satisfaction elsewhere. This is very toxic and traumatizing. Any feedback is appreciated.
Forgiveness can be a challenging process, especially when there are patterns of hurtful behavior and a repetition of negative cycles in a relationship. It's important to recognize that forgiveness doesn't mean accepting or excusing harmful actions. It's about finding a way to release yourself from the burden of anger and resentment, for your own well-being.
Finding a middle ground in a relationship where splitting occurs can be difficult, and it's essential to address this issue with open and honest communication. Being vulnerable in a relationship can be scary, particularly when there is a fear of being hurt again. You mentioned that your body clenches with each episode, indicating the profound impact these experiences have on you.
To avoid closing off your heart, it's crucial to prioritize self-care and set boundaries. Reflect on what you need in a relationship to feel safe and respected, and communicate those needs assertively to your partner. Trust and emotional safety are built gradually, and it's okay to take time to assess whether the relationship is genuinely nurturing and supportive of your well-being.
Dealing with past trauma, such as Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD), can indeed impact one's ability to experience intimacy.
In relationships, both partners should aim for mutual respect and understanding, rather than perpetuating harmful societal beliefs or gender roles. No one should feel pressured to meet unrealistic expectations or sacrifice their emotional well-being for the sake of others. Healthy relationships thrive on open communication, empathy, and a willingness to support each other's growth.
Your feelings and experiences matter, and it's essential to prioritize your well-being and happiness.
You can find videos on boundaries here: ruclips.net/user/DocSnipessearch?query=boundaries
Videos on assertive communication here: ruclips.net/user/DocSnipessearch?query=communication
This video will help you with forgiveness: ruclips.net/video/vGDrnOkVhlA/видео.html
@@DocSnipes this was phenomenally helpful! TY🌻
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Why are psychologists so averse to giving any real kind of advice to the partner that's on the receiving end of the split? You go to the point of saying the splitter isn't even doing anything wrong?!
They are straight up ABUSING their partner. Gaslighting, lying, screaming, baseless accusations, in a context where by your own admission you aren't even allowed to defend yourself, is straight up abuse.
Absolutely bonkers that there is just no real advice for the target of the split out there, even among 'professionals'.
I have covered that in several videos. www.youtube.com/@DocSnipes/search?query=splitting
@@DocSnipes I have watched your other videos on this, and I'm sorry, but you don't.
You aren't alone in this problem, what I'm saying is that there doesn't seem to be any genuine advice from psychologists for the spouse of someone with BPD, on how to navigate this, fully from the perspective of the spouse.
All of the advice tends to be in the framework of the person with BPD; what they are experiencing, what is happening to them, and how all the people around them should craft their thinking around that.
Do you really think there aren't mental health implications to dealing with someone that constantly is splitting on you? Mental health implications for the target of the split? Where the advice of just laying it at the feet of the BPD condition just doesn't work?
It's not so easy to just bifurcate one's thinking and separate the piercing venom that is coming out of their mouth during a split, and pretend it doesn't hurt. Pretend it doesn't affect us. To just lay it at the feet of their BPD condition and not feel as though it's them that's actually saying these things.
There are profound mental health consequences to this, to just taking it, to just being the punching bag year after year, and I haven't found a single psychologist yet that actually appreciates what it's like being on the receiving end of all of this - aside from the ones who say it's just not worth it to get into a relationship/marriage with someone with BPD. To just avoid it to begin with.
Is that the answer? If you don't want to be a punching bag your whole life, getting utterly destroyed by the person who is supposed to love you, who you are supposed to feel safe with, just don't marry them to begin with?
@@MenOfVirtueyou are absolutely correct. Thank you so much for voicing that so clearly. I’ve spent years looking for the same answers for the same problems and only get those same responses.
Exactly. I have explained it to my BPD partner the same way. The behaviors are wrong and abusive.
Thank you for this information! I didn’t know this word Splitting till now and wondered why what’s wrong
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
I kinda had a splitting event where I mainly saw my mom as the villain even after her remorseful acts. One thing I started to question was, "How many times would I have to get back at her for the numerous times she did it to me? Would it even make me feel good? A short time, maybe, but what then? I would be nearly torturing her for years on end, and no one will get any rest, and I wanted rest now."
Thanks for watching the video and for sharing. Rest is important and forgiveness is a gift for ourselves
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
@@SuziOkbagabir-l1m Dude. With all due respect... I am a Christian but vomiting bible verses is not the way to actually help convert. You can use it a reference sheet if people ask but I promise you that hardly any atheists will listen to you if you just do it that way.
@@ythatesfacts yeh, and that quote doesn't even seem to relate to splitting.
OMG! First; Dr Snipes ❤looks good today! Second; thank you! I had no idea about splitting behavior.
You’re so welcome. I appreciate you watching and am grateful to be of help.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Ive been through this, my ex husband has ptsd, his depression meds were decreased too quickly and he spiralled into major depressive episode. Im the enemy in his mind, he divorced me and he also has had periods of psychosis that ive witnessed. Its a nightmare. Thirty years married then he turned on me like a rabid dog.
That’s awful and I am so sorry it happened to you
Everything is always 110% the ex husband's "fault", aye?
Too funny.
Great job on this video! You were able to emphasize with the person that’s not splitting as well which is helpful. Very nice Doc Snipes!
Thank you. I appreciate you watching the video
I have bpd and am always splitting. I find it so difficult bc im usually in rational mind to protect muself from too many emotions amd preventing a nervous breakdown. I find listening to Wise mind meditation helps center me and I would recommend this to others including those without bpd
Thanks for watching the video and for sharing what helps you. I am sorry you are struggling with BPD. Have you watched the videos on BPD on the channel?
👌More videos can be found on this topic at
ruclips.net/p/PLcB3trehXswhDimuZ6lD8yJL33aQMZN_A
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👍Online Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certification
❤Thanks so much for your clear explanation of things. This is the first time I've heard the term "Splitting" though familiar with the concept. It sounds very similar to black & white (or polarized) thinking, a trait/behavior many people with narcissistic personality types display. Would you also compare this with projection? It seems like a similar thought process, or at least the same cause & effect. Our brains are so complex, I wish there was a magic pill to erase the negative impacts!
Thank you for watching the video and for sharing
Thanks this topic has a lot to relate to.
You’re so welcome. I am grateful to be of help and I appreciate you watching the video
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Off topic, what do you call someone who can only exist while taking care of others but when they do anything for themselves they feel overwhelming guilt?
Thanks for watching the video. I would say they are codependent. Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ruclips.net/user/DocSnipessearch?query=codependency
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
What is it called when you are so upset that you just cannot take it and all of a sudden you just stop caring about anything that you were upset about, like you become ambivalent about the fact that your partner may be breaking up with you? Like from the most intense emotions you’ve ever felt almost like suicidal rage, to absolute ambivalence, even amusement over the situation?
Part of the fight or flight response... fight, flight, flee, fawn or F*** it.
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É um problema do youtube ou configuração do canal
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And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Snipemeister! Good morning!
Thank you for watching the video :)
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
Can splitting manifest in a more cold/ holding back/ putting up walls attitude as opposed to flat out anger or fighting?
certainly. We all fight and flee in our own way. THe walls is an example of fleeing into your own head.
Is it still splitting if they really did something wrong [boundary violation] and you express it too them in lots of words?
Seems like there's a lot of fine lines between just not putting up with bad behavior and blaming the victim
When addressing whether expressing a boundary violation in detail constitutes splitting, it's important to understand the concept of splitting and how it relates to boundary violations and communication.
Splitting is a defense mechanism often seen in individuals with abandonment anxiety or insecure attachment. It involves viewing people or situations in all-or-nothing terms-either all good or all bad. This can be a protective behavior triggered by feelings of unsafety or fear of abandonment.
Differentiating Splitting from Assertive Communication
Context of the Behavior:
Splitting: Typically occurs when someone feels threatened or unsafe, leading them to categorize the other person as entirely bad to protect themselves.
Assertive Communication: Involves expressing feelings and boundaries clearly and respectfully, without resorting to all-or-nothing thinking.
Intent and Emotional Regulation:
Splitting: Often accompanied by intense emotional dysregulation, such as sudden anger or fear.
Assertive Communication: Aims to address the issue calmly and constructively, focusing on specific behaviors rather than labeling the person as entirely bad.
Outcome and Impact:
Splitting: Can lead to feelings of guilt and walking on eggshells for both parties involved.
Assertive Communication: Seeks to resolve the issue and maintain a healthy relationship dynamic by setting clear boundaries.
Addressing Boundary Violations
When someone violates your boundaries, it's crucial to communicate this assertively. Here are some steps to follow:
Identify the Behavior: Clearly state what the boundary violation was.
Express Your Feelings: Share how the violation made you feel.
Set Clear Boundaries: Explain what you need to feel safe and respected in the relationship.
Seek Resolution: Work together to find a solution that respects both parties' needs.
Example of Assertive Communication
Splitting Response: "You always disrespect my boundaries! You never care about my feelings!"
Assertive Response: "When you went through my personal belongings without asking, I felt disrespected. I need you to respect my privacy and ask for permission before doing that in the future."
By focusing on specific behaviors and expressing your feelings without resorting to all-or-nothing thinking, you can address boundary violations effectively without engaging in splitting.
If you have any more questions or need further clarification, feel free to ask or use allceus.com/AskDocSnipes to learn how to set and maintain healthy boundaries.
Thank you 😊
You’re most welcome. Thanks for watching. I am grateful to be of help.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
But something is wrong with them... they are not resilient to be in the usual situations of life
Thanks for watching and for sharing
Thanks
You’re so welcome. Thanks for watching the video
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
How many times can a person split in one day
Splitting is a psychological phenomenon often associated with personality disorders, particularly borderline personality disorder (BPD). It involves a person viewing themselves, others, or situations in extremes-either all good or all bad, with no middle ground. The frequency of splitting can vary widely among individuals and can be influenced by various factors, including stress, interpersonal conflicts, and individual coping mechanisms. While there isn't a specific number of times a person can split in one day, as it is highly individual, it's important to understand that for someone with a personality disorder prone to splitting, it can happen multiple times a day, especially during periods of high emotional turmoil or stress. If you or someone you know is struggling with splitting, it may be helpful to explore the underlying traumas and memories associated with this behavior. Therapy can be beneficial for individuals to explore their traumas and vulnerabilities and identify strategies for change. Grounding techniques, distress tolerance, and radical acceptance are important tools to restore a sense of safety and empowerment in the moment.
I feel like this describes what my teenage son has done to me. He used to be a funny curious affectionate kid but at about 13 he stopped talking to me. It got progressively worse and went from one word answers to being ignored and then being mocked for trying to start every day afresh bothering to try and talk. He's with my brother now because his hatred for me was so off the scale. He told me I was a bitch. I said why am I a bitch. He had nothing. Called me more names. But there's no reason, no ''you're a bitch because....'''. It's awful. I hope one day he values having a mother.
That’s awful and I am so deeply sorry it happened to you
You should take him to Dr. Amen at Amen clinics, he does brain scans and treatment based on that. He tries natural supplements first before meds.
Great.
Thank you for watching
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
I wish my employer would understand this so I wouldn't loose my job every week
I am sorry about the fact that your employer doesn’t understand splitting and that you are losing your job every week. I appreciate you watching the video.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 Therefore say to them, Thus says the Lord God: None of my words will be delayed any longer, but the word that I speak will be performed, declares the Lord God. Ezekiel 12:28 He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves wealth with his income; this also is vanity. Ecclesiastes 5:10 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? John 6:62 For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:3-4 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. Hebrews 3:4Jesus answered them, “This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” John 6:29In you, O Lord, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me! Psalm 31:1You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take sickness away from among you. Exodus 23:25Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. 2 Timothy 4:2
@@DocSnipesany advice for people who have issues in worķ place. My son loses a job every 3 months due to bpd
This information is for YOU to understand and learn from it so YOU can keep a job. The only common denominator in YOUR experience is YOU. If YOU lose a job every week, do YOU think all bosses are the same or is YOUR behaviour in every situation the same?