The funny side of fear -- conquering anxiety through comedy | Daniel Hardman | TEDxDouglas

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  • Опубликовано: 11 янв 2025

Комментарии • 97

  • @shunkela
    @shunkela 7 лет назад +89

    "I did terribly, but all I felt was relief". Overcoming fear feels so good

    • @danielhardman1202
      @danielhardman1202 6 лет назад +1

      Too true Shunkela, thanks for the positive comment.

  • @retrosun1845
    @retrosun1845 2 года назад +12

    I'm a performer since I was 15 and anxiety was pretty bad, I still get it but have learned to accept. Here are my golden rules 1) when you feel anxiety coming on NEVER push it away, accept it for all that is and itll pass
    2) it's just an uncomfortable feeling and nothing more
    3) you're not going to die, your mind is lying to you
    4) what's the worse that can happen?
    5) love yourself, you're getting better and better

  • @iamsingh007
    @iamsingh007 Год назад +2

    I have never heard anything as relatable as this. I lost so much in my life due to my fear and anxiety... I have always wondered what if I would have conquered my anxiety. I could have achieved so much. I feel like an underachiever. People around me used to admire me but I just never lived up to my potential. Always afraid about what could go wrong, or that I am not good enough. I am still young in my mid 20s. One day I will overcome this. I owe myself this!
    Thank you to the speaker for his courage to give this speech. Gives me hope!

  • @tazpoochie
    @tazpoochie 4 года назад +8

    What a nice guy . Top talk . Anxiety steals your life from you . Don’t let it

  • @candykandy
    @candykandy 4 года назад +7

    He seemed like he was struggling with the talk but he went out and did it beautifully anyway. Conquering fear FTW

  • @Latinarama
    @Latinarama 3 года назад +6

    This is exactly what I want to do to overcome my anxiety. I have lived half of my life in fear. I'm 30 now. The last ten years of my life I didn't realise that I had so much fear. I was depressed, but I thought that was just part of me. Now I realise I was depressed because I wasn't doing the scary things that would make me happy.
    Three years ago, I already came up with the idea of trying stand up. I shoved it aside, telling myself it wasn't what I wanted to do. That I didn't need people's attention or approval, no laughter or applause. I was right, but I missed the point. The point isn't to get approval, it's to overcome the fear and build self-confidence.
    My plan is to first try sky diving. That should really give me a boost since I'm afraid of heights. After that I will visit open mics and try outs to see how it works, and to watch others bomb on stage. Then I must try it myself.
    I have my anxiety to thank for this plan. Before, I was just depressed, and content being so. A month ago I had my first panic attack. That changed everything. I realise now that even if I keep avoiding my fears, it will simply come to visit me in my sleep. Terrorise me during the day. During my panic attack I was more scared than I'd ever been, even more scared than when I had to speak in public. I feel like my subconscious is giving me this fear to tell me something very important. That I haven't given up. That I don't want to die. That I want to be happy.

  • @rmp251
    @rmp251 6 лет назад +59

    1. Let life happen. Control is illusion. "Those who grasp lose" (Buddhist proverb)
    2. Self-investment. Only you can approve of yourself. No one can tell you what you do is good or bad.
    3. What pain do you want? What we get out of life isn't determined by the good feelings we desire, but by the bad feelings we are willing and able to sustain to get to those good feelings. (Mark Manson)
    You don't need to be anything or do anything to be deemed as worthy. You make that decision at any moment you please, and I invite you to do that right now. Have you done it?

  • @KhanhTheLearner
    @KhanhTheLearner 7 лет назад +25

    I can relate to him very much. I used to be very shy and quiet in my high school, but I would always look up to some of my friends who could confidently come on stage to perform their talents or speak to the entire school while I had a stagefright every time I made a presentation in class.
    One fine day I just decided that I was sick of my current self and I was going to change, and I joined the school's public speaking club. It was, back then, the stupidest thing I could have done because I would screw up so hard, or so I thought, but of course it was the best thing I could have done to myself.
    After I conquered the fear of signing up, came the fear of my first speech in front of 20 friends in the club. Then the 2nd, and the 3rd, and a competition with 10 other schools. The fear is still there every time I make a public speech now, but I am more aware of it and I know how to handle it just a little better every time. I'm in college now and I realize the tremendous difference compared to me in high school.
    I still got last place in that competition, though, but all I felt was relief that I could stand up and speak to so many "scary strangers", and I made many friends.

  • @alifarhan1838
    @alifarhan1838 8 лет назад +52

    I had the same story with anxiety but my struggle with it ended the day I learned the fact that anxiety is not bad itself but the negative thinking patterns we associate with it ,in fact anxiety is good for you its providing you with the energy you need to deal with the situation

    • @goud2488
      @goud2488 8 лет назад +1

      I think the chemical and/or adrenal reaction is far too powerful for brain to understand.. when you're just saying "hello" to some dipshit intern... but 30 seconds later you freak out wondering why we still have water coolers, and if you do in fact live in a world where you have water coolers, then what led you to such a shitty world of water coolers. why not have wireless water routers or sumthin?

    • @danielhardman1202
      @danielhardman1202 8 лет назад +3

      Thanks for you comment Ali, I completely agree. Neil Burton's TED talk puts anxiety and depression in a positive light too, you should check it out!

    • @danielhardman1202
      @danielhardman1202 8 лет назад +3

      Ali Farhan Swati well said mate

    • @necrospirin
      @necrospirin 7 лет назад +2

      yo bro after so much thinking and checking inside my emotions eryday I realized that emotional checking the thoughts were the culprit that lead to anxiety..not the anxiety itself...anxiety all starts with fearful thinkin and negative outcomes...little do we kno at that time the anxiety itself ain't the problem..

    • @jeron7114
      @jeron7114 7 лет назад +3

      Yeah, I totally agree with you. All it's needed is a shift in the way you experience anxiety. It's way better thinking of it as a energy and be "excited" by it, than see it as a bad thing.

  • @peterwu8471
    @peterwu8471 Год назад

    I hate anxiety - it has caused me years of physical pain... I think it's great to hear this presentation.

  • @flarethorax
    @flarethorax 8 лет назад +42

    i'm going to feel the fear and do it anyway this video has inspired me

  • @ChitChatChik
    @ChitChatChik 4 года назад +5

    This gave me new perspective to social anxiety. Thank you to the speaker. He was amazing.

  • @suiylawcoconsultanciescame701
    @suiylawcoconsultanciescame701 2 года назад +1

    This is life. It what we get for being alive. We definitely conquer fear by being in the present moment. It's the past and the future that causes anxiety. What do we expect or what are we expecting? It's hear that our imagination step in and causes our heart and breathe to feel or even become heavy.
    Thanks for the talk.

  • @anubebe3
    @anubebe3 4 года назад +5

    Even though his hands were trembling and he was nervous he never gave up and finished the whole talk. That's me when I have to give a presentation or public talk. I feel like I'm gonna die because I get so nervous that my hands and voice trembles and I'm scared that I will embarass myself. But the moment it's over there is a lot of relief and I regret thinking I could have done it better.

    • @laurens1886
      @laurens1886 3 года назад

      You have to focus more on the process than the outcome! Do whatever you can to make your presentation the best you can FOR YOU and enjoy it! And then let the outcome be what it will be... 😀

  • @sncre
    @sncre 6 лет назад +6

    This is exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you!

  • @perfectcelery
    @perfectcelery 8 лет назад +15

    A generous-hearted and empowering talk - thanks for doing it!

    • @danielhardman1202
      @danielhardman1202 7 лет назад

      perfectcelery thank you for the positive comment!

    • @jennaerdogan8270
      @jennaerdogan8270 7 лет назад +1

      I completely agree with perfectcelery. After a day full of panic attacks this was just what I needed before bedtime-- thank you!

    • @danielhardman1202
      @danielhardman1202 7 лет назад +1

      All the best on your journey Jenna. You can beat this! Thanks for the comment.

  • @agingophelia9812
    @agingophelia9812 7 лет назад +3

    The Litany Against Fear has helped me many a time. It helped me cut my way through a dozen phobias, along with a few other tools.

    • @gailpinto9379
      @gailpinto9379 7 лет назад

      Aging Ophelia I've suffered from health anxiety for three years now... I wish I could learn a little from you!

    • @parmindersingh3920
      @parmindersingh3920 7 лет назад

      Aging Ophelia the first

  • @nawtmyrealnamelol
    @nawtmyrealnamelol 5 лет назад +2

    "What we get out of life is not determined by the good feelings we desire, but by the bad feelings we're willing and able to sustain"

  • @Rosalindxxxxxx
    @Rosalindxxxxxx 7 лет назад +14

    That was very helpful, Daniel. Battling anxiety and depression I know all the feelings. Yet I also know it's rewarding once you're on the other side of fear. Also, I haven't seen anyone mention that you're also very cute :)

  • @Omkar3324
    @Omkar3324 3 года назад

    confidence is something that you gain with life experiences

  • @Filangee1234
    @Filangee1234 2 года назад +1

    Thank you for the wonderful and extremely helpful talk!

  • @arlinegeorge6967
    @arlinegeorge6967 3 года назад

    Life is magical wonders. Great great talk. Thank you, bless you. All your dreams come true .

  • @Melgocris
    @Melgocris 4 года назад +2

    this made me cry, I identify so much.

  • @obdt99
    @obdt99 6 лет назад +4

    Well thought out and presented talk. Thank you for sharing.

  • @nerdycommunity
    @nerdycommunity 4 года назад +1

    Thank you for this speech. I really liked the 3 quotes you gave at the end. Hope I can take those to heart.

  • @kibrekidusanmequanint4874
    @kibrekidusanmequanint4874 3 года назад

    Living with it and don't think it will go away

  • @nessagoodie
    @nessagoodie 9 лет назад +7

    This is so good, thank you!!!!

  • @alenastead5583
    @alenastead5583 Год назад

    really good and inspiring and true

  • @michaela1541
    @michaela1541 2 года назад

    one quote I would add is by Robert Kid - "terror and violence is provoked by the mind"

  • @LAHOIE
    @LAHOIE 7 лет назад +2

    wonderful video ... !!! you are so brave

  • @TFTRecords
    @TFTRecords 4 года назад

    still my favourite ever ted talk

  • @KoolT
    @KoolT 2 года назад

    Bravo !

  • @surabhidharmadhikari1101
    @surabhidharmadhikari1101 5 лет назад +2

    'Submit to imperfection'

  • @nathanael2345
    @nathanael2345 8 лет назад +2

    Awesome, man! Congratulations and thank you for your message!

  • @babepeacock
    @babepeacock 6 лет назад +1

    Loved this

  • @christinacriddle1963
    @christinacriddle1963 5 лет назад +2

    I'm afraid, scared all of the time night and day every second that goes bye. I've started new meds for the time in my life.49 now.sufferd stroke from food poisoning 3yrs now. I've no1

    • @mpggv8368
      @mpggv8368 5 лет назад

      It's essential that you get a good you get a good behaviour i.e cbt therapist

  • @jasond626
    @jasond626 4 года назад

    Great short video with useful ideas.. Nice one man

  • @tiritis
    @tiritis 7 лет назад +1

    Loved this talked. I really did! Thanks dude 🙏🙏

  • @laurenkate9295
    @laurenkate9295 6 лет назад

    This was amazing - thank you!

  • @abdul.arif2000
    @abdul.arif2000 6 лет назад +8

    My man sounds like he's straight out of Game of Thrones

    • @xyzv8640
      @xyzv8640 5 лет назад

      🤣 And I was wondering, what or whom he reminds me of 🤔 so true!

  • @matty301
    @matty301 2 года назад

    Respect bro 👍

  • @yunlee4415
    @yunlee4415 4 года назад +5

    My son has anxiety and he keeps talking about. He says he has fast heart beat

    • @subhrajitdey5513
      @subhrajitdey5513 4 года назад +1

      Teach him meditation.michael Sealey channel has helped me

    • @subhrajitdey5513
      @subhrajitdey5513 3 года назад

      @تلاوات القران - Tilawat Al-Quran wow. Thanks. 🙏. Wishing you all the best in the Holy Month

    • @subhrajitdey5513
      @subhrajitdey5513 3 года назад

      @تلاوات القران - Tilawat Al-Quran It will pass away.

  • @haSHAH1
    @haSHAH1 4 года назад

    AMAZING , TOLLE

  • @CityThatCannotBeCaptured
    @CityThatCannotBeCaptured 8 лет назад +2

    Brilliant.

  • @LaithAlkhalili
    @LaithAlkhalili 9 лет назад +2

    Thanks a lot :)

  • @colemanadamson5943
    @colemanadamson5943 6 лет назад +1

    Amazing how it gets it all right but all wrong at the same time.

  • @JohnStockton7459
    @JohnStockton7459 4 года назад +1

    Feel the fear and do it anyway book

  • @MMijdus
    @MMijdus 6 лет назад +9

    Babies/toddlers should be forbidden in the audience. It is disturbing. They don't understand much of what is said anyway, or do they.

    • @malcolmarcher6986
      @malcolmarcher6986 6 лет назад +5

      I found it distracted from the importance of the moment, especially for the guy on stage. Have never heard that sort of distraction on a TED Talk before. Why would someone bring a child to such an event?

    • @MMijdus
      @MMijdus 6 лет назад +2

      Malcolm Archer Exactly. A case of ignorance, in my opinion.

    • @oryou1142
      @oryou1142 5 лет назад

      Forbidden!

  • @farheenkhan5275
    @farheenkhan5275 5 лет назад +3

    The baby though

  • @Xbot4Life
    @Xbot4Life 7 лет назад +8

    Are his hands shaking? So im the the only who does it. Actually my hands develope a mind of its own, watch the anime Parasyte, its like that but without the protection.

    • @Smudgie_
      @Smudgie_ 7 лет назад +2

      Xbot4Life My hands shake really bad too when I have to perform. I'll be waiting for a piano exam and whilst I'm running through my pieces I honestly look like I have severe Parkinson's disease because I shake that badly.

    • @Xbot4Life
      @Xbot4Life 4 года назад

      @@Smudgie_ sorry for delay in responding lol YT didnt notify me. Seem like a few of us do this!

    • @Xbot4Life
      @Xbot4Life 4 года назад

      @Espada Arrancar true. True

  • @mundoinvisivelxd1936
    @mundoinvisivelxd1936 8 лет назад +10

    many of the ted talk should be called ted story ,..because they tell their stories but not techniques or ideias they had ...they should tell their techniques and just then the story following ..

  • @KoolT
    @KoolT 2 года назад

    In entertainment a lot of customers are drunk. Just keep singing or talking.

  • @11219tt
    @11219tt 6 лет назад +3

    You say that “you decide what you think you decide what you feel. Do you decided to start re-frame you’re thinking “my question is how??? What are the daily activities that you do, whether it’s writing or meditation or what, what is it that you do to re-frame you’re thinking? I understand that you made a decision to do that but what is it that you were doing???
    I am lost!

  • @gettrick32
    @gettrick32 3 года назад

    When do you Improve Runcorn Cheshire

  • @emirertunc1846
    @emirertunc1846 4 года назад

    I cant sleep....l feel exausted

  • @libethlibet9826
    @libethlibet9826 6 лет назад

    very cutie!

  • @TheJ4RyD
    @TheJ4RyD 8 лет назад

    hes obviously not conquered it

    • @keeziajensen2611
      @keeziajensen2611 8 лет назад +40

      he's made immense progress. he just gave that amazing speech about when he was absolutely terrified of even being on stage. He took 8 months to book an act. Sorry about whatever in your life that makes you feel you have to undermine someone's progress in dealing with mental illness. That shit deserves a gold metal

    • @TheJ4RyD
      @TheJ4RyD 8 лет назад +1

      Yes,but conquered is a dishonest choice of word that helps no one. I didnt mean anything more than that.

    • @davidtabor2465
      @davidtabor2465 8 лет назад +3

      Tit.

    • @CityThatCannotBeCaptured
      @CityThatCannotBeCaptured 8 лет назад

      TheJ4RD: Oh fuck off arsewipe.

    • @cellogirl11rw55
      @cellogirl11rw55 8 лет назад +5

      Anxiety is hardwired into our brains to alert us to danger. So, conquering anxiety means to simply learn how to cope with it when it comes instead of letting it rule your life

  • @ophiophagushannah1573
    @ophiophagushannah1573 7 лет назад

    taking advice from him would be like taking advice from overweight trainer