RiffTrax: Star Games (Full Movie)
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- Опубликовано: 9 сен 2024
- Clown computers! CGI backgrounds! Diabetes! Evil Tony Curtis! What's not to like? Own it yourself: rifftrax.com/s...
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The most unrealistic part of this movie is a Game Gear lasting that long on batteries.
Or that he was playing sonic with a Batman game in the system….
Damnit, I was gonna say that! 😂
@@metaldave08096 The fact you were paying that much attention to the movie to notice that is truly admirable lol
For sure! Had one, back in the day. I'd be lucky to get 3-4 hours out of it. That thing DEVOURED batteries. Still loved it, though. XD
Anybody else super disappointed when the ranger said "Mr. Barrington" and it turned out to be the name of the dad and not the name of the bear?
"Since my yout' in da Bronx!!!"
🤣🤣🤣
Hi Projected Man 👋😀
@@jonilougy6608
Hey Joni. Ehhhh, sorry I gotta take off.
If only he never LEFT THE BRONX!
RiffTrax: "If you don't donate, we'll send Happy to your house."
Me: *Throws money at screen in abject fear*
On a serious note: if you use an adblocker, turn it off when on this channel. It really helps them out.
Turn off Adblock or Happy will eat your soul.
To paraphrase Michael Caine, when asked about this movie, Tony Curtis replied, 'I have not seen the film you mention, but I have seen the used Toyota Corolla hatchback it paid for, and it is completely adequate.'
Haha can also cite Jeremy Irons, no more payments on his new house after dungeons and dragons
Perhaps even a Yugo.
Underrated comment.
Quality allusion here.
@@davidevans3987
Or Yugo's new 4 door it's
called the WeGo!
Somewhere there was an abandoned Blockbuster Video where this movie sat alone until discovered by Rifftrax search teams.
Even with RiffTrax, this movie is painful to watch.
Between the atrocious acting, the nonsensical plot that has absolutely zero thought put into it other than being derivative as fuck, and being yet another movie about wandering through the woods, yeah... this was a rough watch.
It kinda grew on me though. One of those that goes down easier the second time.
My first watch i struggled to get through, but like rlm i stuck it out to the end. I use it to sleep to now. Boring AF.
Think of it this way. The rifftrax staff had to watch it multiple times and try to find something funny.
Worse crime, boring.
"...Yay?!?!"
Deep hurting. Definitely deep hurting.
One of my all time favorite riffs, and one of my favorite lines, "it's official, I'm now rooting for diabetes."
Wilford Brimley was rooting for it this entire time yet nobody cares about him.
The delivery of the line "Oh my God, I've lost them both" sounds like she's talking about her set of storage keys.
The idea that someone sat down and wrote their movie to begin with “Hi, I live on a planet called Alriscon…” just baffling 😂
They named it after the prescription drugs they were abusing.
Clunky exposition is my favorite aspect of bad movies.
@@HylianFox3 yes but getting clunky exposition into the very first line of your movie is pretty impressive I feel ☺️
@@HylianFox3 i prefer the bad sex scenes, but clunky exposition is pretty good, too.
@@tackyman2011 Medication names make great planet titles.
As a diabetic, I also rooted for diabetes during this movie.
Define dark humor....🙂
I think the bear could smell the sugar
What about Happy being bayonetted in the stomach? Did you root for that? I did.
ALAN! ALAN? DONT FORGET TO TAKE YOUR MEDICAN ALAN! ALAN? ALAN NORRIS? ALAN?????
Type 2 here. Was fully cheering on for diabetes to win.
After experiencing Happy The Clown I feel I was too hard on Jar Jar Binks.
Hey, let’s be fair: Jar Jar at least got a better shot (and better writing) in Clone Wars.
At least the actor went on to do fairly odd parents, neds declassified, and team america
Happy The Clown is still a better character than Rey, Finn or Rose.
Then again, a bowl of pudding has more acting range than Daisy Ridley.
@@Jay_76 *sigh* i'm not gonna argue with you cause "you can't argue with stupid"
@@jonathancharron7360 That's why I'm not arguing.
The park ranger is the best actor in this movie and I'm 100% serious. The bear is also good, but bears are always good.
You can tell he's working his ass off in this movie. I'll let you guess who I'm referring to.
The true most unbelievable thing in this movie is Brian even being allowed to have the volume up on his handheld in the car. _Sure, movie._ *Sure.*
Nothing should ever make someone say, "The Ice Cream Bunny makes total sense to me now.", but here we are; a sign of the end.
"Um, actually the inventor says its pronounced "The Jift." ROFL Holy crap I laughed so hard at that joke.
Same here!
It’s •G•iff and it always will be.
I've never heard so many people yell "Brian!" without Graham Chapman telling them to go away.
Best comment here by far!
Top-tier comment.
@@minxstole93 That's very flattering.
Gotta give credit where credit is due and that is a solid Monty Python reference! 😉
Tony Curtis needed smokes money and he was bored sitting around doing crossword puzzles.
“Argh! Blood sugar, regulated! Pancreas, relieved!”
😂😂😂
Ironically, fact that Happy the Holographic Clown was the best role Daran Norris could get before The Fairly OddParents makes me unhappy.
Hey, he also played the Club Scum MC in Hobgoblins.
56:59 Golden Corral’s new slogan:
Don’t swallow; just chew.
I’m dead. 💀☠️💀
I swear. If I'm right and Happy is played by Darren Norris, we now have proof that there are worse fates than working for Butch Hartman or Dan Schneider...
What's wrong with Butch Hartman?
It feels like Graydon Clark made this as an elaborate punishment for his son not taking his insulin.
He wrote a film that he made his son star in instead of just taking away his Game Gear
Ah, yes. Happy the Clown. He's like the Cherokee Jack of this movie. You can't forget him, even though you should.
He's the Shoeboogie of this movie.
It's wonderful thinking about the mind state of the person who thought it was a great idea at every step in the process, writing, casting, filming, doing the insert shots...
I'm Cherokee Jack. Wait I mean Happy the clown.
I'm Cherokee Jack
Happy the clown is WAY scarier than Pennywise
Love how flat and emotionless the dad is when his son is being chased by a bear.
So, did Tony Curtis do this as a part of a Make a Wish request or something? This movie is the equivalent of shot in the neck with an arrow and realizing that there is a gas bill attached to the arrow.
Wait... You don't get your gas bill via arrow?
😂 thank you
@@theoldladygamerishere384 Kunai to the thigh 😑
And after all of that, you still need to take your insulin shot.
Someone *_else's_* gas bill.
"And this thing's gone through 30 Double A batteries today."
As a former owner of a Sega GameGear, can confirm that statement. The one I had annihilated batteries.
Meeting a galactic king for the first time, and your first statement is "gimme five."
Oh, this one hurts. These kids are shouting their lines like they're on two different sets and they're interacting through an early video phone.
“The Journey and Boston album covers are at war!”
Pop quiz:
Does this movie shout "Brian!" more than "Cabot!" was shouted in MST3K: Outlaw of Gor?
It's good to see the kids take after their father as far as cinematic talent is concerned.
"We have an invincible shield around our planet, but we're going to send a valuable potential hostage to a DIFFERENT planet... you know... for safety!"
I can safely say Happy is the most frightening alien AI Daran Norris has ever played. And he played a Decepticon for crying out loud
Good thing Daran went on to do better roles in TV shows after this mess!
@@victorhernandez8723 He was also the Club Scum MC in 'Hobgoblins', dude has a sordid past
@@HylianFox3 *"Sigh* ... _Hobgoblins_ was a looong time ago..."
@@HylianFox3 "Proof that there is no life after drama club!"
Knockout would look at this movie in stunned horror.
The preview picture looks extremely promising. Clowns and space go together like mac 'n cheese or Mac and Me.
You know what they say, Promises were made to be broken.
@@MiddleAgedNerd I'm usually not this optimistic, but it's *definitely* promising from my POV.
Factoring in the following, uh, factors means I* have a low probability of disappointment:
1. I love their humor.
2. I find their voices to be soothing.
2a. Even in insanity.
3. It was starting to look like there wouldn't be any more full length releases.
4. I really enjoy the group riffing during the premier.
and
4a. RiffTrax also seems to like our riffs.
*Probabilities of _your_ disappointment may vary.
@@RobotoSan Oh, my apologies, I was making a joke and it seems I should have worded it better. I've seen the Star Games Rifftrax a bajillion times and it's as amazing as it seems you are hoping. I just thought you were expecting humor from the clown (Happy), in which case you will find nothing but pain and despair. As a side note, Happy is played, by the Club Scum emcee from Hobgoblins.
@@MiddleAgedNerd No apologies necessary, I figured it was a joke and just wanted to give you some straight man material to run with. I probably did it wrong this time, but in the past it's set up some truly entertaining faux debates 😀
It's a good one. The clown isn't prominent, but what little time he has weighs heavy on the film and your soul.
When the ranger yells "Mister Barrington!" I thought he was talking to the bear.
I thought he was yelling Mr. Berenstain but was thinking "Bearenstein" in his head.
I can't believe how many Rifftrax/MST3K movies I've needed to say, "You leave Bea Arthur alone, damn you" to the guys.
Bill himself actually says that during the Live showing of Santa Claus
Ya. I love all you guys up there fillin' my heart with Joy
(not the dish soap)
No one gets to riff on a Golden Girl. Anyway, Bea could take take you down so easily Bill!
If she wasn't dead and all.
@@faithfulgrl Who the fuck cares about the Golden Girls?
@@tuckerbowen4626the one with the martians or the bunny?
@@youngmultiverser9311 the one with Satan, Merlin, and the adorable Mexican little girl
That horrible hologram clown was played by Daran Norris. I'm glad that this movie didn't ruin his career.
Thought he looked familiar. Also the MC at Club Scum in "Hobgoblins."
Manos is, by FAR, a superior movie in every way!
This movie is still better than Rollergator.
@@AlcoholicBoredom Y'know, when I started on this MST3K-Rifftrax-RLM journey years ago, I had NO IDEA how deep the bad movie rabbit hole really goes. The fact that I can now think of stuff *worse than Rollergator* implies that there might not be a bottom.
Manos is effective in one sense; it is genuinely creepy. They're both awful movies, but this one has no redeeming qualities whatsoever.
@@tillitsdone Well said. Seems like a good illustration of the difference between a "good bad movie" and "trash."
Let's not go overboard here.
I can’t believe this movie got a Sega game gear scene , And he’s actually playing a game on it, take that ! Rumble in the Bronx.
A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.
While I appreciate the War Games reference, were there any games in this movie? I mean, we have like one minute of combined footage of them controlling punching monsters, but surely that isn’t what the title meant.
This movie is very unsettling. Things that claim to be human wrote, directed and edited this. This is the kind of movie that can easily be used to prop up lizard people type conspiracies because it's REALLY hard to believe actual humans that have met other humans created it.
It may prove the lizard people exist, but it also shows they’re losers rather than omnipotent puppet masters.
My thoughts exactly. It's not real. It can't exist
"Just repeat to yourself that it's just a show and I should really just relax!"
(-for mystery science theater 3000!... 'twang') 😀🖒
I wish I had written this. Actually, I did, and you stole it from me.
Signed: "Lizard King".
@@emitindustries8304 If was stolen from the Lizard King, the thief did him a favor.
Not since the times of homicidal sheriff Thomas Jefferson Geronimo’s “Final Justice” has Greydon Clark offered up such a tasty nugget of film entertainment.
Tasty nugget? MEATBALLS FRIED IN LAAARRRRDDD!
Holy crap "Final Justice" now that was a turtlehead of a movie!
See what you did, Kilgore? Now Joe Don is on to you. Best hide all of your pork and pork-related items.
Yeah, if anyone was wondering what the director of "Joy Sticks" was up to at the very end of his career... it was this.
Hahaha the first thing I thought of when I saw the Ranger was Zap Rousdower
This "movie" makes Overdrawn At The Memory Bank an Academy Award winner. Raul's acting was definitely better than Tony Curtis's
"Yonda lies da castle of my faddah!" 🤣🤣🤣
Raul could act circles around most of his peers even if he was in a coma.
Overdrawn at the Memory Bank is my favorite MST3K episode, even though it gives most people a headache.
@@theboombody I loved it too
My Nuts.
@@theboombody Agreed! The movie is so goofy and batshit weird that I actually kind of enjoy watching it ironically. The riffs in it are on point as well
So yeah, Happy was more frightening than any of the Killer Klowns from Outer Space. How marvelous.
What about the FNAF animatronics?
He’s pretty agreeable for a wide awake nightmare.
🤡 Oh, kIlLeR KlOwNs.
I saw it the moment it came out. If I remember correctly it was made as a baseline.
@@TF2Fan101literally the least scary thing I could imagine.
If anyone needs me, I will be here for the next 4 days waiting for the premiere of this RiffTrax showing.
It was worth the wait! My only question is where do they get all the space leather for their outfits? 😂 #CowsInSpace
Daran Norris as Happy the holographic Robin Williams-like clown has to be the most bizarre live action role he ever done. 😳
9:20
I was sober when the movie started... 12 beers later not drunk enough to think this movie was good
Watching Star Games made me wish for the comparative realism, comedic writing, and acting excellence of Rollergator.
Rollergator makes Star Games
look like a Fellini flick.
"This is pro Vasectomy propaganda isn't it?". Awesome.
The more I learn about Daran Norris' dark acting past, the happier I am that he actually made a name for himself.
I thought you meant Dean Norris and had a "wait wtf really" moment lol
I mean he is Cosmo in the fairly odd parents but that show has been through the super toilet in the form of the live action movies and series
@@Sarahonwheels Didn’t he also voice in a few anime including Cowboy Bebop?
he was also timmy's dad right
Hard to believe his first role was in fucking _Hobgoblins._
This movie is insane. I lost it when the clown showed up
It was genius to use the natural bad acting ability of a untalented child actor to depict the unusual nature of a robot from space!
The kid is supposed to be a robot, right...?
Well...
The other kid's acting was far more hilarious, though. The little "robot from space" was almost good, *in comparison* .
Nah, even robots have emotions than that puppet.
A robotic jester prince to be exact.
So, a male Small Wonder?
I’ve set up my room six or seven times already. I’m ready to play Star Games.
Same here. Thankfully they released "Setting Up A Room" first for my sake!... .. good vitnamiz restaurant...
I'm assuming Tony Curtis only did this for whiskey money.
You think he looks like somebody who knew where he was during that shoot?
No kidding. Or he was on something when he agreed to do it.
I think maybe he did it to write of his own son’s medical supplies as a business expense. (Literally, the kid sticks himself with an actual needle in the movie. That has to be real; the movie *literally* cannot afford to fake it...)
And a carton of smokes
@@Tustin2121 that's a good point.... I think some of the actors are related for sure. Look at their faces.
Literal LOL @1:27:10 - "'I'll never forget you." "Me neither." "Both sounded like threats."
Diabetes the motion picture! Starring Jonathan Taylor Thomas in the role of a lifetime as the prince of space. So cool!
JIIIIIIIIIM!
@@Jorokusaki Brian!! Brriiaaan!
They have a buttload of spaceships, but "Interplanetary travel is forbidden!" Then, back to the spaceships...
“And then there’s Poopiter and Penus, with a U…”
I lost it there.
What bill was about to go to collection when Tony Curtis agreed to be in this?
His mob loan
That would be a more interesting story.... Is there another clown involved😂?
@@Fatherofheroesandheroines It _would_ make sense if this whole thing was just a money laundering scheme.
"It's those damn video games you let him play all the time! He lives in a fantasy world!"
"Specifically Hyrule, it's gentrifying and rents are going through the roof!"
Welp, I've got some questions after watching this movie:
Why did the prince leave the ship when he got to earth in the first place?
Why was Brian so clumsy with his game console when the bear showed up?
Why does this alien civilization have weapons that require passwords?
Why did the evil alien guy attack the planet only to teleport away and go after the prince? Why not send his forces to the planet as a diversion while he goes after the prince himself?
Why even send the prince away at all? Wouldn't he be safer on his home world? Y'know, the one with the SPACE SHIELD?!?!???!?
What is the planet the prince is from even called? I can't understand what they say every time its name is mentioned.
Why does Happy take the form of a nightmare clown?
Who was editing the audio for this movie?
Why does the king go to the Council of Ancients or whatever while his planet is being attacked?
Why do the Ancients look like pyramids?
Who was editing the special effects for this movie?
Why did the prince just not teleport away in the spaceship once he was inside it?
Could they seriously not come up with a more creative or cooler sounding name for the power they wield than 'The Gift'?
Why is there seemingly only one ranger in this park?
Why does Brian not really seem to care about the fact he has diabetes at the beginning?
How is it possible that Star Crash is a higher quality movie than this?
Why disable the shields on the ship? Why even leave it when the defense system seems to be doing a good job of repelling the sphere's attack?
Why does the villain utilize spheres to attack? Why not just send them out to scout the forest and then attempt to either grab the boys or pinpoint their location?
Does the villain have any advisors or assistants? Are the robots seriously all he has in terms of his forces? and a
What's with the alien pyramids that work arbitrarily?
Why wasn't the prince's translator already activated when he came to earth?
Why was no one suspicious of the park ranger's tone turning all sinister?
Why is everyone in this movie either stupid or oblivious?
Who wrote this script? Who approved it?
Why is the villain considered such a threat when he couldn't attack the planet because of the shield and when he's easily defeated by a teenager's hypodermic needle?
Why does no one ask about the prince's strange clothing?
Who seriously looked at these kids acting and said, 'THIS IS PERFECT!!!!!!'?
How did they get Daran Norris for this movie?
Who was editing this movie?
How do the boys develop a telepathic bond with each other?
Why doesn't the prince kick the villain in the knees and run away?
Why doesn't the villain just teleport away with the prince the second they're in the beam?
Why doesn't the villain notice Brian showing Kirk the needle?
What's with the pyramids in the area where the villain teleports away with the prince?
Who looked at the final product and said, 'YES!!!! THIS IS PERFECT!!!!!!!!!!!!'?
How does the king have the ability to just instantly cure Brian's diabetes?
Why did the prince go to get Brian at the end of the movie? What possible use could he have in whatever's happening?
Where does the search party go?
And, finally...
WHY IS JOTARO KUJO PART OF THE SEARCH PARTY??!?!???!
Very good questions 👏
You forgot "how did NOBODY have access to an actual bloodhound for the search party? I mean, I'll bet even the local humane society could have hooked them up for free"
Ditto
Hahaha the only one I can answer is who thought this movie was perfect, i don't think anyone did, most people in the film industry are well aware when they're working on dumpster fires, it's just a paycheck
Unless the director is delusional like a Wiseau/Breen and thinks it's great
Also maybe Polnareff and Kakoyin are in here too somewhere?
To quote my dad whenever I would have questions like this about a movie, "because it was in the script"
Little prince Kirk talks like he has a mouth full of marbles 😂
What a god-damned weird movie.
A movie made with a 5 dollar budget. You dont see that anymore.
Well, it did have a 100 dollar budget, but the other 95 bucks went to Tony Curtis.
Feeders. 1996 I believe.
You do there just all on SyFy these days.
I'm only 7 min in and my only request is to see more of the bad guy's hand sparking electricity to his console!
Where's the ceiling to how many times an audience can see that shot!?
About twice
More like the floor joists above a crawl space than a ceiling.
BEAR: I have prepared a brief statement…uh, roar!
Coulda swore his name was Mr. Bearington... lol isn't that what the ranger called `em?
This movie is from 1998? How in the heck? It looks sooo 80's. Wow, what a stinker! Thanks for the upload!
This predates The Phantom Menace.
literally on par with the old m2t3k show. i was crying with laughter at so many lines in this. "You come with me. I wanna show you my......gift"
I've seen a lot of bad movies. But this was a lot of staring with my head tilted.
"Brian!" & "Kirk" has been added to the "Jason!" file in my brain. Thank you, holographic clowns.
I love RIffTrax, it's like our beloved show never ended. Hope they never stop.
I love how Tony still acted his heart out in this pile
This is one of my favorites! thanks, Rufftrucks
I think you mean Rafftrix.
Refftrecks is always good for a laugh.
RoofTricks is the best ever!
I have always preferred Mastery Sceance Thoater 9000 to their work on this new Rofftrycks show. But at least it’s free 🤷🏻♂️
J/K, this is just as good as that old show with the plastic robots.
Tony Curtis 🤣 I knew he had a lot of problems towards the end, but I never knew things got this bad
"Brian? You're not still playing that stupid video game, are you? Also, did the bear eat you?"
"Brian?" "Nerds?" "BRIAN!" "NNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRDS!!!"
"KUUUUUUUUUURK!"
@@Virjunior01 "HAPPY! AAAAAAGH!!!"
I'm learning so much about bears and bear safety watching this.
E.g., Don't teleport them up to your ship.
@@nickfarmer2452 That was actually how I thought “Spaceballs” should have ended.
Well, I fell asleep halfway. Thankfully, the BRIAN! woke me back up.
Welp, looks like I need to take off work. It's more important things right now: a new Rifftrax video!
'You can't keep your eyes on that video screen all day long'
-Man whose job is making movies for eyes to view on video screens
Yelling Brian - Star Games
Yelling Chris - A Talking Cat!?!
I sense a pattern.
Cabot?
This movie is pretty good for something written and directed by a couple of kids that age.
I don't think the kids directed this.
I got the distinct vibes that this was written by a 13 year old. It ticks all the boxes. Heavily derivative of other popular fiction, poorly thought out pacing and story, overly imaginative ideas with no logic behind them, and surface level characters.
Really feels like something I'd have written when I was in 8th grade... which makes it all the more embarrassing that the kids dad apparently wrote it.
@@TF2Fan101 you're only as old as you feel.
"The other planets call it.... the one with about twenty years left." Ouch.
"Doom came out seven years ago. Why are you still playing it?"
Because DOOM is forever, Old Man!
I’m surprised Mike, Kevin and Bill never made a joke about the fact that Laura (the mom) was the teacher in Angels Revenge. She was also Greydon Clark’s wife. Sadly she died of cancer almost 20 years ago.
She's hot.
Wait.. the clown… that’s Daran Norris. Who’d have thought they’d find an even more embarrassing thing from his early career than Hobgoblins.
Fun fact: Terrifying Clown AI is played by the same guy who played the Club Scum Emcee in "Hobgoblins."
Also Cosmo in "The Fairly Odd Parents," incidentally. THAT was a quality production.
The next time someone accuses the room of having no budget or effort, show them this movie....
What a story, killeing.
yeah, you can't accuse the room of having no effort, not when tommy wiseau did 49 takes, with a concussion, to get the "i did not hit her, i did not" line down. tommy busted his ass off for that movie, he just lacked competence.
@@scottmatheson3346 o wow he really had a concussion when filming :o?
wow. where has this "movie" been all my life
0:54 Wait. So it is both a Spaceship and a planet? That is powered by heavy petting? 1:04 No, that makes you insufferable. 1:17 Immediately abuses it the second his grandson is in danger. 3:04 Watch it. You're gonna poke someone's eye out swinging that thing. 3:19 None of this technology can overcome their reflective shields and can be bested by mirrors and rope.3:11 He is immediately stopped by their shields and loses his entire attacking army. 3:43 What do you mean human? Aren't you from a planet that looks like a three-breasted training bra? 3:53 Nice of the bad guys to wait until they put up their shields before they attacked. 3:53 Why does his attacking force look like it's from a bubble bath commercial and his main ship looks like it was stolen from BSG? 3:58 He does not. 5:04 Surrender peacefully or I'll give you a chance to escape. 5:22 Meanwhile, his grandson has a magic watch that makes them invisible and uses illusions. 5:53 Instead of standing on an invincible ship for some dumb reason. That has no force fields and ease to overcome guards with useless weapons. 6:50 Why is he in a medieval fort? This movie is so confusing. Might as well send him gift-wrapped to the bad guy. 7:16 Did they really have to borrow the helmets from Spaceballs? 8:55 AHHH! Pennywise! 9:06 I'm not actually there but be sure to bitch slap and gut punch my two loyal female guards that will do nothing to defend themselves as a consolation prize. So I guess the bad guy wouldn't have believed it was really the price it he was standing by himself? Prince: I don't value your lives, bye. 9:36 I have an idea too. Shut the hell up and engage autopilot back to triboobular. Where you will be safe. Instead of a backwaters Earth.9:42 How does a movie from 1997 have worst special effects than the original Stars Wars in 1977? 9:47 Doesn't Earth has enough bad drivers already? 11:5-0 A poison that is cured by eating a candy bar. 12:55 Hey, Booboo. Let's go get us a pic-a-nic basket. 15:17 I feel like Pokémon GO is getting way out of hand. 25:52 Does this count as kidnapping? 28:51 Oh, no. He died. Well, roll credits. Our suffering is over. 28:56 He lived? Damnit! 29:13 Too bad he couldn't do the same for this movie.39:05 Any logical reason why he kidnapped this other kid? Did he get tired of talking to creepy Ronald McDonald on that spaceship? 31:42 So when do the Star Games start? 32:15 So they act badly? 33:57 How does an advanced race not have autopilot? 34:23 Even the translator rolled its eyes. 35:39 Having Killer Clowns from Outer Space flashbacks. 36:35 Robin Williams is rolling over in his grave. 37:04 It's a terrible impression. 39:30And I thought Jar Jar was annoying. 43:52 So, not gonna scan for life signs? Any reason why the bad guy is after the Prince? 47:58 DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING AT ALL? 48:02 So either the cloaking ability on the watch stopped working. Or he turned it off immediately after they walked by 48:08 You mean the people that blow up your little ship seconds after you escaped it? Those are the ones that won't shoot you? 49:11 So I guess the cloaking effect no longer works? 48:36 Why do they need him alive? And didn't they just try to kill him by blowing up his ship? 49:28 There is only 1 monster mimicking the prince's movements. So why is the other kid asking like a spaz? 51:03 Way to raise a sexist son, Mom. 52:46 So instead of asking for a weapon, they ask for a mirror, hoping the laser would bounce back like a cartoon? Wait? Did they just try to kill him again? 53:05 So they can find their own guys but not the Prince? 53:32 Seems pretty simple. They vapored him. 53:52 One of them is just gonna be a tampon. 54:07 What a useless piece of junk. What is this? The Price is right? Summons are just some random stuff your mom owns. Mom's pocket rocket is gonna show up. 54:34 What a condescending little shit. Why would you go to a planet for protection and know nothing about it? Does this world look like it has intergalactic TV reception? The only building you've seen looks like it was from the 1200s. 54:50 Yeah, he also named his pet Rock. They are so much more advanced. 55:13 Look out! It's a moving rope. So let's just ignore it? 56:11 So what was the point in giving up your location if they can be instantly fixed? 58:27 No, it's called eating at Taco Bell. 59:25 My wish is for this movie to end. 59:35 When you see an unknown alien object be sure to instantly pick it up. It prolly won't kill or irradiate you. 59:39 If it's as helpful as the last object, it prolly a coat hanger. 59"54 Password is 'Ungrateful Little Snot.' 59:54 Does he even know his mom? Because she and his father seemed to be missing for the entire movie for no reason. 1:00:10 They might overtake us with their light jogging. 1:00:28 Response from the Prince of "I don't know" and "I can't think of anything" makes me wonder if he is just a dumbass. 100:44 Yep. He is an idiot. 1:01:03 His mom was really into irony. 1:01:14 The 'Gift' is the wisdom of the eternal laws is available to all who seek peace. Not "Guess Password for a Gun." 1:03:05 What a bunch of useless stuff this kid has. 1:03:22 The 'gift' doesn't include acting ability. 1:04:45 That explains why the prince's parents never showed up. 1:04:54 The angry mom's stance of "What do you think you are doing?" 1:05:05 Now, they want to capture him? 1:05:11 How to let people know you are a good guy. Use a human shield. 1:05:21 Future King? Is the bad guy gonna marry the Prince? 1:05:30 But why? I know he is annoying, but the prince is more annoying. 1:06:34 They were leading the bear with cookies, so why did it appear behind the robot instead of behind the boys? Not that the whole plan isn't asinine anyways. 1:07:14 So, is the bear inside a spaceship tearing apart robots like in Galaxy Quest? Because that would be far more watchable than Dumb and Dumber: The Adolescence Years. 107:31 If their job was to talk over each other's lines, mission accomplished. 1:08:01 Did the bad guy have no idea what the prince looked like all this time? 1:09:59 Nothing rang any bells in Brian's head when a forest ranger managed to find the parents of a kid from outer space? 1:10:25 I've seen infants struggle harder than this kid. 1:11:34 I object. It's not fantasy. It's a sci-fi world. 1:12:00 His dad is a dick. He goes through an entire scary adventure with Prince I Don't Know, and all he gets is condescension from his dad. How about being thankful he wasn't torn apart by Cocaine Bear? 1:13:39 Why is he driving around at all? Doesn't he have a teleporter? 1:17:23 I can't see why this movie didn't win an Oscar with lines like that. They were robbed! 1:17:36 Why is she blaming him? He took the other kid, and her son ran off again. 1:18:27 Telepathic powers come out of nowhere. 1:18:38 I am the Great Mighty Poo. 1:19:28 Teleporter must have a bad connection. What bad timing. 1:19: I guess they just had to flick the on/off switch a couple of times. 1:20:03 What? Why? 1:20:48 Still teleporting... 1:26:57 Please erase this movie from my mind too. 1:28:58 It Must be a Nightmare, then. 1:29:46 Where are the Star Games? Hell, where are the Prince's parents? Misleading Movie Title. There are neither Stars nor Games in this movie.
Praise the bear!
Roar.
It’s clear no one told this kid about, Ranger danger lol.
I hereby nominate 21:37 for "Strangest Moment in Cinema History"
"you're in the dead lights now!!!" lol
The sad part is I recognize the clown AI as Darren Norris aka Cosmo from Fairy Odd Parents.
Sadder is I also recognized him in the Hobgoblins MST3K riff
God bless him, he’s clearly doing his best here but WOOF
I feel the 'Beetus meme is so old that Wilford Brimley could've easily played the space grandpa
"Where's the make out with Tails button?"
BRIAN?
@1:27:32 "Not since Iwo Jima has an image so captured the American spirit" 🤣🤣 I could not stop laughing!! I love you guys!
I took a screenshot of that scene, printed it out and framed it in hopes one day someone will see it and be very confused. 😂
This is the product of a fifth grade writing project that also happened to earn the attention of Tony Curtis...
"You're in the deadlights now!" Lol
Battle Beyond The Stars was the "we have Star Wars at home" movie.
This is Star Wars at the homeless shelter.
Mike picking apart Robin Williams gimmick:
I don’t know why but I feel personally attacked.