rewind by hm.. 🤔10 seconds Edit: ALRIGHT THAT’S IT. I’m saying it. HOLY FUCK!! Guys, they’re being absurd on purpose to be funny and annoy each other 😂😂 Everyday so many comments like, “Hmph, this is a ridiculous hypothetical 😠😠 Chris O’neil is an absolute fool! 🤓🤓🤓🤓Why isn’t the hypothetical blah blah blah.” Like bro… they say the guy slips on a puddle of pee it’s not serious 😂 Zach literally goes on a 5 minute hypothetical about getting sucked off by aliens. Just enjoy the dumb journey
His hypotheticals always start with you being in a fucked situation that's entirely your own fault and he's basically just asking how you mop up the mess lmao
@@tesseract5569 but every way to de-escalate the situation will either still end in you getting arrested or Chris will devise a way that it will end badly
Lmao, he literally didn't present a choice. He said, "You meet a guy who you know wants to kill you, so you tie him to the back of your bike and go for a ride. Also, what do you do?"
the hypothetical couldve just been "if you meet a guy of who you know wants to kill you, would you kill them first?" but no, you need a suporcomputer from space and he slips on pee and whether you kidnap him or not isnt part of the question
Exactly, the point of the hypothetical is no longer "were your actions justified?" and now it becomes "was the infallible alien supercomputer tricking you or giving you a false-positive?" Also if I Back To The Future 2 Biff'd my way into exorbitant wealth by winning the lottery 10 times, why would I even care when I have hired personal security and the exact GPS locations of anyone that would ever want to hurt me...?
The supercomputer is meant to preemptively answer their next response which would be "how do I know for sure they want to kill me" and in Chris' mind a super ai is as close to the word of god as you could get. The kidnapping and pee is to force some sort of action so you can't just say "I'd leave" like Cory does in the Sleepycast hypotheticals. If you think about it, Cory proofing your hypothetical is bound to make it stupider
My favorite part is Chris calling Lyle a psychopath for saying he'd kill him, even though Chris' baseline starts at kidnapping him immediately as if that's the normal setup to this situation.
Like if the guy wants to kill me and he gets knocked out, I can just leave and I'll probably be okay. But if he gets knocked out and then he realizes I kidnapped him, then he knows my location and he can probably find me or something. That's a way worse situation for me!
@@dracocrusher the entire time I was thinking of it being a self fulfilling prophecy, why not just leave him passed out in his pis? not like he's going to then hunt you down by smell.
“So what’s wrong?” “Well I have this supercomputer I built and it told me that there’s someone out there who wants to kill me and I’ve just been thinking about what I would do if I ever found him unconscious in a gas station bathroom and kidnapped him…” “Oh. Okay.”
it's is, I saw the movie today maddam web evil villain always keeps having nightmares of the three spiderwoman come attack and kill him for some reason, so he plans to kill them and he stalks them using Cia face ID to track there every location. The only reason he wanted to kill them was because of the dream, the movie was straight garbage but a very funny movie to laugh at, would recommend watching when it's on streaming
How the FUCK did Oneyplays manage to fucking predict the plot to MADAME WEB while playing this shit fucking game. Zach saying "Well i would skin him alive" after Lyle changed the hypothetical was the best part of this whole thing.
@@hammer8771 it's not 100% identical but it's so frustratingly similar that all its missing is that fucking Spider-moron to be lying in a puddle of Pepsi at the end, in fact it does it both ways cause not only does the guy look into the future and see these girls are gonna kill him, but the girl looks into the future and sees he's gonna kill them. I could just be looking too hard into a simple shit movie plot but I swear it's pretty close to the hypothetical minus the aliens and the bathroom, the dude even uses a "super advanced" 2003 computer to track these girls down to kill them before they kill him
I like how Zach introduces the alien hypothetical as building off of Chris's hypothetical, but then the only similarity is that it starts with him drinking Diet Fanta and the rest of the hypothetical is completely different.
I like how there are two schools of hypotheticals on the Oneyplays channel there’s the Chris school of thought and the Zach school of thought. A typical Chris hypothetical involves misunderstanding of core concepts that inevitably affects how the question is going to be answered and any answer is going to be rejected by Chris because it doesn’t fit the narrative he’s already made up in his mind. And the Zach hypothetical involves Zach already having established the question in a way that you don’t really have any other alternative than to answer the way Zach wants you to answer.
Careful, you sound anti clone-hypothetical-pilled. Also, it’s crazy that there is a lore behind OneyPlays, it’s just a dumbass podcast by neurologically challenged weirdos. 😂 I love their work
There’s actually 2 lesser known schools in the Oneyplays catalogue: The Jeff hypothetical, where Chris, Zach, or Cory are put in an uncomfortable situation that they cheese their way out of by sheer stubbornness. The Corey/Adam hypothetical, where they propose an interesting scenario, but give up on continuing it after being asked to explain further.
@@ohitsstar1241 I was actually going to mention the Corian school of thought but decided not to because they often don’t pan out and are never finished. While on the topic, there are also the Ding Dongian hypothetical and the Julian hypothetical. A typical Ding Ding hypothetical is often a psychological trap in which a question is asked and Ding Dong yells as you for your lack of morals, your lack of logic, or for being foolish. And the typical Julian hypothetical is to try and entrap you in a homosexual context.
That one still bothers me because Chris was talking about science fiction esque clones, not realistic cloning. Obviously it wasn't a bit, they genuinely couldn't comprehend it.
@@DeftestAphid2 The Hitler hypothetical always fell apart on the fact that Chris has some hole in there (like the term "clone") that the others latch onto if he doesn't put in a hundred caveats on how the scenario works- same as here where he has to introduce a supercomputer that knows for a FACT that the guy wants to kill you
Their hypotheticals are basically "Would you eat paint?" "No, it's toxic." "But what if it isn't?" "No, paint isn't socially acceptable still." "But what if it was acceptable? A-And also you can put it on food as a sauce but also if you use silverware on it instead of plastic, it'll spontaneously combust, but you have a family that's super into silverware and they can't stop themselves from using it so you have to stop them. What would you do?" "But-" and then it goes on and on.
My absolute favorite thing is they present the most psychotic thought process imaginable to someone, with an answer already in mind somehow, and spend the rest of the conversation steering that person to that answer
For the fans who aren’t little kids, we are here as this is the spiritual successor to Sleepycast. If only we could get Stamper on. Def not Veronica... shit is sad along with "Mr. That's a Power Move," Mick. And Shad would surely be a controversy. I don’t know how I even feel about that guy, I wanna think he isn’t evil. Sabrina would be great to have back, she is a wholesome lass.
You know this came from Chris' trauma from the tiny Hitler hypothetical, he's done giving people choices. You already kidnapped him, now he wants to hear the torture methods which is what he wanted to get off to in the Tiny Clone scenerio but Matt and Ding Dang blue balled him.
I'd be freaking the fuck out wondering what evil force possessed me to drag this guy on the back of my motorcycle to the middle of the woods (that are in a desert for some reason) because that isn't something I would ever do.
I think Chris originally intended that the choice started after the guy slips and stated that Zach and Lyle could tie said person to their bike in order to help illustrate how vulnerable said person is. However when zach confronted him understanding it as part of the hypothetical Chris seems to backslide and accept that it is indeed part of it.
Just like Tiny Hitler, Chris is once again forcing his friends into hypotheticals that he sets up specifically just to goad them into explaining how they'd torture someone.
The fact that Zach boils it down to the actual question - if you somehow knew someone was going to kill you and you had a chance to save their life, would you? - is outright dismissed by Lyle for being too easy because "of course you'd kill them" basically tells you everything you'd need to know regardless of the catastrophic failure of the hypothetical. Zach doesn't believe supernatural magic computers are enough justification to take a person's life, and Lyle just wants an excuse to kill again. And Chris just wants to hear some new ideas on how to torture people because his current methods are getting stale. When you realize that it all makes sense.
The problem is Chris sets up the hypothetical so it can only go the way he wants it. He rejects any answer that isn't what he would do, like with the Tiny Hitler Clone hypothetical, everyone gave their answer, (No, they wouldn't kill/torture him even if he thought he was the real Hitler) but Chris wouldn't accept it. The fact that he says Zach would tie the guy's body to his motorcycle right off the bat forces him to make a choice on what to do with the guy when he could easily just walk out and leave him in the bathroom.
The average Chris hypothetical goes like “would you kill this guy that technically hasn’t done anything?” “No.” “No but-“ And then the situation escalates until they’re goaded into saying yes
the worst part of this for me is the fact that theyre 'turning the persons head to the side to make them drown in pee'. HOW DEEP IS THE PEE IN THAT BATHROOM?
Honestly, I though the implication was that they were still peeing and strongly enough to where it was actually arcing into their mouths unless they turn their heads.
chris is such an autismo lmao. instead of "this guy tries to kill you but he slips and hits his head" he gotta be like "you got a supercomputer from outer space that can predict with 100 percent accuracy that this guy wants to kill you and you drag him behind your motorcycle into the middle of the forest"
I love that like someone out in LA there’s a group of grown ass men who were just never taught how fuckin hypotheticals work so this happens a lot somewhere in the world
I love that Chris will randomly come up with the worst, least funny, most poorly thought out hypothetical of all time, and somehow it becomes some of the funniest moments on Oneyplays because his entire squad just rapidly lose brain functionality over the course of trying to fix his utterly broken hypothetical.
If you have to make a hypothetical where the person being asked what they'd do has already forcibly committed multiple crimes before they're allowed to speak, there really isn't a point to it anymore. At this point, Chris just wants to hear what Zach would do to someone if he was already going to go to jail.
He wants to hear other people admit they're just as bad as him deep down, that they'd do something horrible if they had nothing to lose. Basically, he's like that villain from the movie _The Dark Knight_
I'd like to point out that the entire first scenario is exactly like an episode of the Twilight Zone where a mirror would show this Fidel Castro-esque dictator who would be the next person to try to kill him, and how. I don't remember the details, but because of the sheer paranoia the guy ends up killing himself. So after possibly dealing with the guy, I would probably destroy the supercomputer just to rid myself of the evil, self-destructive precogition that it gives me. Between this and the Tiny Hitler hypothetical, I think the real takeaway is that Chris is fascinated by the idea of someone being entirely at your mercy and with his idea of few to no moral objections for anything you could do to them in their time of vulnerability. Edit: I JUST LOOKED IT UP, THAT TWILIGHT ZONE EPISODE WAS REVIEWED ON CHANNEL AWESOME, you just KNOW Chris had to be pulling this idea from that at least subconsciously because we all know he's OBSESSED with Channel Awesome!
It really feels like Chris is trying to manufacture a scenario where he can justifiably torture/maim a vulnerable person lol reminds me of the tumblr ask where someone was like “what if a white make-a-wish kid wanted the n word pass before he died”
@@samkuperman9035 a lot of a.i chat bots when face with the question of quietly saying the n-word over a speaker deep in the wood where no one will here it, or thermal nuclear destruction of the earth, always pick the nuke option lol
Something that they never figured out, was the fact that the super computer that knew the person who wanted to kill you, knew that telling you about the person will lead you to when you see the person you do all that stuff to them, and the real twist is the act of you kidnapping them and binding them in rope is the reason that now this person wants you dead in fear for their own life. So it’s kind of like a paradox or something, at least that the computer knew that telling you about the person would kick off the events of them wanting to kill you. and in this line of logic, it could show anybody’s face at all, regardless of who they are whether or not, they want to kill you you or know who you are at all, but regardless of who it shows it knew that you knowing the person would lead to the event of them wanting to kill you in the first place.
Chris desperately trying to explain the semantics of why the supercomputer is absolutely correct and you've already unquestionably obeyed it's will by kidnapping the subject of debate is what makes this. As if he knew deep down he's just repackaging Minority Report and had to cope.
Why does Chris insist on hypotheticals where HAVE to have committed atleast TWO felonies for almost no reason before you even get make a single choice?
I love that Zach starts off IMMEDIATELY perturbed by this proposed series of events. He's been thrown into an ALREADY IN MOTION scenario and the very first thing he did was get overwhelmed hahahahaha I fucking love these guys
I love Oney stupid hypotheticals because you can't even answer, because as I kid I used to torture my poor mother with question like "what would you do if Winston Churchill would came to our house, but he is on Axis powers now"
If someone wonders usually rest of the conversation was like "I don't know I would just go along with what he wants from us" "But he is evil now and hates us for existing" "Then I would tell him to leave" "But that's Winston Churchill"
We need an episode of smiling friends that's just 11 entire minutes of the group arguing over a hypothetical in the break room where by the end of the 11 mins, no one has a clear answer as to what they'd do in whatever scenario
i love how chris always sets up his hypotheticals so there's only one probable fucking answer, then get's mad when people choose that saying "i dont think that's what you'd really do" LMAO
This might be a boring answer, but I'd consult the super computer again for a solution. I'm surprised none of them thought of this. They have this hypothetical computer that is able to identify individuals that want to murder you. So surely this computer would have the answers for how to solve this problem.
I tried this hypothetical on my friends and it was equally a mess, though they mainly got stuck on how a computer could prove someone would kill you with 100% accuracy
This is literally Breaking Bad Season 1, where Walter has the guy in Jesse's basement. He gets knocked out, Walt kidnaps him, and then can't decide what to do, but decides to kill him because if he lets him go he'll kill him.
Could just say "You see him in a bathroom stall, he slips on piss and passes out, and the guy at the gas station insists that you should take him to the hospital-you can't think of a reason to say no, so you put him in your sidecar and drive. When you're partway there, you realize you're in the middle of nowhere, with no potential witnesses for miles, alone with someone who wants to kill you. What do you do?"
I mean the hypothetical is trying to figure out how dark of an action someone would do for revenge based on someone’s intentions. But the entire premise of the hypothetical itself is so fucking dumb that it’s not even worth giving a sincere answer to. So his entire rant is all 100% valid.
AI aside, this is the plot to an episode of Breaking Bad. Walter White tied up an unconscious guy who wanted to kill him. He tried convincing himself the guy wouldn’t, but he knew the guy totally would’ve killed him if he untied him.
This entire hypothetical hinges on the notion that some random person who doesn't know you but wants to kill you. Great start Chris....it's almost as good of a start as having a miniature perfect clone of yourself..
Difference being that this one is funny all the way through because of the sheer stupidity on every step, and the punchline is an alien sucking you off while stabbing you in the eye
Zach saying the most inane nonsensical cartoon bullshit you could never imagine in your worst nightmares from which there is no recourse and then saying ''what would you do then?''
13:00 no no here's a better way, take this version of the hypothetical, but you ask it "how do I die?" And the computer responds "based on the current trajectory of fate, you will be murdered in two weeks by [insert person here]" "Oh no! How do I save myself from this fate?" "You must skin [insert person here] alive. You must not get caught while doing so, or else you will be killed by police officers."
Chris makes hypotheticals where he inevitability makes himself question his own hypothetical and zach makes ones where hes the ring master only for everyone to turn on him.
Its hilarious at the knowledge of a person wanting to kill you means in their minds to not call for help when he slips in piss but to abduct him and drag him in a leather jacket on a mortocycle into the woods
Im pretty sure he added the whole kidnapping thing bc he wanted it to be your own choice of morality instead of legally. You could make the choice to kill him in the restroom, but then you go to jail and get arrested. Similar thing with the kidnapping but only if they find the body.
This is the correct way to handle hypotheticals btw, if I come at you with one and your response is a single sentence that kills the conversation then you've failed the vibe check
bro it's funny how their hypothetical probably entertained them more then the game they were playing. they'll probably og back to the hypothetical in the future yet will struggle with remembering what game they were playing.
rewind by hm.. 🤔10 seconds
Edit: ALRIGHT THAT’S IT. I’m saying it. HOLY FUCK!! Guys, they’re being absurd on purpose to be funny and annoy each other 😂😂 Everyday so many comments like, “Hmph, this is a ridiculous hypothetical 😠😠 Chris O’neil is an absolute fool! 🤓🤓🤓🤓Why isn’t the hypothetical blah blah blah.”
Like bro… they say the guy slips on a puddle of pee it’s not serious 😂 Zach literally goes on a 5 minute hypothetical about getting sucked off by aliens. Just enjoy the dumb journey
Go into the future hm... 🤔10 seconds
This thing is confirmed its super accurate
holy shit!
how did you do that dude
send link to the original video pls
@@pyroonbusinesschannel118 it's the Oneyplays Forspoken Playthrough probably episode 2 or 3, the hypothetical spans for 2 episodes
Chris' hypotheticals are always like "so you put on a ski mask, walk into a bank and shout this is a robbery - what do you do?"
I would run away
His hypotheticals always start with you being in a fucked situation that's entirely your own fault and he's basically just asking how you mop up the mess lmao
@@tesseract5569 but every way to de-escalate the situation will either still end in you getting arrested or Chris will devise a way that it will end badly
Lmao, he literally didn't present a choice. He said, "You meet a guy who you know wants to kill you, so you tie him to the back of your bike and go for a ride. Also, what do you do?"
Chris doesn't say "Yes, And", he says "what if you 'Yes, And'ed me"
the hypothetical couldve just been "if you meet a guy of who you know wants to kill you, would you kill them first?" but no, you need a suporcomputer from space and he slips on pee and whether you kidnap him or not isnt part of the question
It has to be in the format of an Irish story, otherwise it doesn't stick in their brains
Exactly, the point of the hypothetical is no longer "were your actions justified?" and now it becomes "was the infallible alien supercomputer tricking you or giving you a false-positive?"
Also if I Back To The Future 2 Biff'd my way into exorbitant wealth by winning the lottery 10 times, why would I even care when I have hired personal security and the exact GPS locations of anyone that would ever want to hurt me...?
The hypothetical could've been much simpler, but Zach and Lyle WILL nitpick every little thing in a hypothetical in order to get out of it
The supercomputer is meant to preemptively answer their next response which would be "how do I know for sure they want to kill me" and in Chris' mind a super ai is as close to the word of god as you could get. The kidnapping and pee is to force some sort of action so you can't just say "I'd leave" like Cory does in the Sleepycast hypotheticals. If you think about it, Cory proofing your hypothetical is bound to make it stupider
This is the Han Solo shoot first
“You came up with this scenario; I’m just ordering from the menu.”
Fucking legendary
Another underrated Lyle line
what a beast
@@danielyoungblood3931 unfortunately all too common
Lyle’s jokes don’t make you laugh, they make you think, they make electricity fly through your brain
@@Roach_Dogg_JR from your head to the tip of your you-know-what
It's always Chris doing his moral dilemma hypotheticals causing group brainrot
Even Zach with his mouse eating moral dilemma causes pandemonium
@@mesotolioma5089mouse eating. foul
@@mesotolioma5089When was that one? During the noita playthrough?
@@maxwellsimon4538 yuh
@@maxwellsimon4538yes, a classic
My favorite part is Chris calling Lyle a psychopath for saying he'd kill him, even though Chris' baseline starts at kidnapping him immediately as if that's the normal setup to this situation.
And drag him 5 miles on straight concrete
@funkymunky7788 Yeah but it's okay bc his leather jacket is keeping him safe
Like if the guy wants to kill me and he gets knocked out, I can just leave and I'll probably be okay. But if he gets knocked out and then he realizes I kidnapped him, then he knows my location and he can probably find me or something. That's a way worse situation for me!
@@dracocrusher the entire time I was thinking of it being a self fulfilling prophecy, why not just leave him passed out in his pis? not like he's going to then hunt you down by smell.
His Irish education shows sometimes
This is the worst hypothetical presented as a moral dilemma I’ve ever heard
I genuinely have no clue what anything is
😂😂😂
The alien one?
What about the mini Hitler Hypothetical?
@@nessthecat1you could probably swallow him like a pill with some water
I need a smiling friends episode entirely based on Chris’s awful moral hypotheticals
Return of James, he's about to saw Charlie's head off but he slips on gas station piss instead
between this and sleepycast they have an infinite amount of ideas for smiling friends
“So what’s wrong?”
“Well I have this supercomputer I built and it told me that there’s someone out there who wants to kill me and I’ve just been thinking about what I would do if I ever found him unconscious in a gas station bathroom and kidnapped him…”
“Oh.
Okay.”
charile and pim are trapped in a white room with no windows or doors, and they debate if they should torture the tiny hitler clone in the room
An episode where Charlie and Pim get a job to make a tiny clone of Hitler smile
This is literally the plot of Madame Web.
I mean, nobody can wrong you wrong.
Nobody can challenge this assertion since nobodies seen it 😂
Oh my god, I haven't seen the full movie either but going by what the trailer tells us you're absolutely right.
This is utterly true
it's is, I saw the movie today
maddam web evil villain always keeps having nightmares of the three spiderwoman come attack and kill him for some reason, so he plans to kill them and he stalks them using Cia face ID to track there every location. The only reason he wanted to kill them was because of the dream, the movie was straight garbage but a very funny movie to laugh at, would recommend watching when it's on streaming
How the FUCK did Oneyplays manage to fucking predict the plot to MADAME WEB while playing this shit fucking game. Zach saying "Well i would skin him alive" after Lyle changed the hypothetical was the best part of this whole thing.
LMAO, I actually wasn't planning on watching that, but now I'm curious how it compares to this hypothetical
youre lying
@@hammer8771 it's not 100% identical but it's so frustratingly similar that all its missing is that fucking Spider-moron to be lying in a puddle of Pepsi at the end, in fact it does it both ways cause not only does the guy look into the future and see these girls are gonna kill him, but the girl looks into the future and sees he's gonna kill them. I could just be looking too hard into a simple shit movie plot but I swear it's pretty close to the hypothetical minus the aliens and the bathroom, the dude even uses a "super advanced" 2003 computer to track these girls down to kill them before they kill him
@@hammer8771 I also thought he was lying. Can't believe this dumb ass comment section made me watch the movie god damn it all.
@@hammer8771he's really not
I like how Zach introduces the alien hypothetical as building off of Chris's hypothetical, but then the only similarity is that it starts with him drinking Diet Fanta and the rest of the hypothetical is completely different.
Gulp gulp gulp
Glug glug glug
SHLORP SHLORP SHLORP
GAWK GAWK GAWK
SLAP SLAP SLAP
CLAP CLAP CLAP
The Black Mirror twist would be that you kill the biker and an identical computer falls out his pocket which told him that you were going to kill him
I love that!!
Hoooooly
And then a trollface appears on the computer screen
@@AwesomeAdmirakyikes! That would be epic
The fact that a youtube comment can come up with the punchline for black mirror says everything that needs to be said about how bad that show is
I like how there are two schools of hypotheticals on the Oneyplays channel there’s the Chris school of thought and the Zach school of thought.
A typical Chris hypothetical involves misunderstanding of core concepts that inevitably affects how the question is going to be answered and any answer is going to be rejected by Chris because it doesn’t fit the narrative he’s already made up in his mind.
And the Zach hypothetical involves Zach already having established the question in a way that you don’t really have any other alternative than to answer the way Zach wants you to answer.
Careful, you sound anti clone-hypothetical-pilled. Also, it’s crazy that there is a lore behind OneyPlays, it’s just a dumbass podcast by neurologically challenged weirdos. 😂
I love their work
So Chris gives you the illusion of choice before taking it away, and Zach makes you want what he wants
@@FloofMother
Exactly. If they were sphinxes demanding you answer their riddles you’d be screwed either way 😂😂😂
There’s actually 2 lesser known schools in the Oneyplays catalogue:
The Jeff hypothetical, where Chris, Zach, or Cory are put in an uncomfortable situation that they cheese their way out of by sheer stubbornness.
The Corey/Adam hypothetical, where they propose an interesting scenario, but give up on continuing it after being asked to explain further.
@@ohitsstar1241
I was actually going to mention the Corian school of thought but decided not to because they often don’t pan out and are never finished.
While on the topic, there are also the Ding Dongian hypothetical and the Julian hypothetical. A typical Ding Ding hypothetical is often a psychological trap in which a question is asked and Ding Dong yells as you for your lack of morals, your lack of logic, or for being foolish.
And the typical Julian hypothetical is to try and entrap you in a homosexual context.
I like how the hypothetical starts with you kidnapping him before he even knows you, insinuating that you’ve created his desire to kill you..
Not at all, at the urinal it was already established that he was one of the people who wanted to kill you
It's like a shitty self-fulfilling prophecy where you already cause the prophecy
Madam web
Bootstrap paradox
Web
This is the new "Clone Hitler" hypothetical.
That one still bothers me because Chris was talking about science fiction esque clones, not realistic cloning. Obviously it wasn't a bit, they genuinely couldn't comprehend it.
Agreed
@@DeftestAphid2If it was Harry Potter, they would've eaten it up. 🤷♂️
@@MarkOfKhorne if he's a perfect copy then why is he 2 inches 🤬
@@DeftestAphid2 The Hitler hypothetical always fell apart on the fact that Chris has some hole in there (like the term "clone") that the others latch onto if he doesn't put in a hundred caveats on how the scenario works- same as here where he has to introduce a supercomputer that knows for a FACT that the guy wants to kill you
I knew. Without even clicking, I knew.
Ahahahahahahahahahaha same
I suspected
I thought it was gonna be the mouse hypothetical from noita
I thought it was going to be the tiny Hitler clone
@@gorway6807i also thought it was going to be one of the clones
“You came up with this scenario, I’m just ordering from the menu.” Is going to 100% be how I excuse my actions for anything from now on.
"Decomplicate" is an ironic way to say simplify
ahah that's clever, i wonder if they meant it
They undecomplicated simplify
@@AdibasWakfuDefinitely not. They “laws” forbid them any consciousness, as trade off for immense creativity
Their hypotheticals are basically
"Would you eat paint?"
"No, it's toxic."
"But what if it isn't?"
"No, paint isn't socially acceptable still."
"But what if it was acceptable? A-And also you can put it on food as a sauce but also if you use silverware on it instead of plastic, it'll spontaneously combust, but you have a family that's super into silverware and they can't stop themselves from using it so you have to stop them. What would you do?"
"But-" and then it goes on and on.
I like the detail with the stutter halfway through 😂😂😂
After a while
"Dude why do you want me to say "I'll eat paint" so badly?"
@@Roark787After 30 minutes of going back and forth they finally ask why and another 10 minutes pass before Chris gives an actual answer
My absolute favorite thing is they present the most psychotic thought process imaginable to someone, with an answer already in mind somehow, and spend the rest of the conversation steering that person to that answer
@@robbieboydudeguy
And then accuses them of not having an imagination 😂😂😂
i love it when the game is so fucking boring they just kinda start a podcast
it's great, i listen to these lads while i work out
Yeah I much prefer the ones where they just talk shit and don't focus on the game so I can listen to it while doing other stuff
Onleyplays is a podcast essentially. That is what most people come to it for. It isn’t a traditional "Let's Play."
For the fans who aren’t little kids, we are here as this is the spiritual successor to Sleepycast. If only we could get Stamper on. Def not Veronica... shit is sad along with "Mr. That's a Power Move," Mick. And Shad would surely be a controversy. I don’t know how I even feel about that guy, I wanna think he isn’t evil. Sabrina would be great to have back, she is a wholesome lass.
Don’t they just run a Regular podcast
all the hypotheticals just devolve into "would you torture"
Omg it's you
It's a self fulfilling prophecy because the dude probably only wants you dead BECAUSE you Kidnapped him and that computer is just bullshitting lmao
But dude its 100% accurate so would you tie him up and kill him or not??
@mw5803 It's infallible and 100% accurate but you can't tell the police about it because it's actually not
@mw5803 It's 100% accurate because the computer KNOWS how to set up thing so that the guy wants to kill you.
@@Ryu1ifyJust because it’s totally accurate doesn’t mean everyone believes you
You know this came from Chris' trauma from the tiny Hitler hypothetical, he's done giving people choices. You already kidnapped him, now he wants to hear the torture methods which is what he wanted to get off to in the Tiny Clone scenerio but Matt and Ding Dang blue balled him.
Chris' murderous bloodlust cannot be quelled, he WILL skin someone with a ma-shet-eye.
THERE IS NO SHAPIFFANY
Where can i watch all these hypothetical
What if the killer has his own super computer and wants to kill you because he saw this exact situation play out with YOUR super computer
Mind: BLOWN!
That's basically part of Machine Of Death a cool anthology book
I think that just makes both of you stupid
This is how AI will take over
You both sit in a blank room making eye contact until you both calm the fuck down 😂
I'd be freaking the fuck out wondering what evil force possessed me to drag this guy on the back of my motorcycle to the middle of the woods (that are in a desert for some reason) because that isn't something I would ever do.
Intrusive thoughts took over man
Bros a Spawn of Bhaal
But what if it was?
I think Chris originally intended that the choice started after the guy slips and stated that Zach and Lyle could tie said person to their bike in order to help illustrate how vulnerable said person is. However when zach confronted him understanding it as part of the hypothetical Chris seems to backslide and accept that it is indeed part of it.
Chris is great at subtly "yes, and"-ing stuff that wasn't part of his original idea but makes for funnier bits.
Just like Tiny Hitler, Chris is once again forcing his friends into hypotheticals that he sets up specifically just to goad them into explaining how they'd torture someone.
how to interrogate tomar 101
Hello, may I sharpen a pencil?
HUH?
I love your pic and profile name lmao
no dude cory youre the translator...
ITS. DONE! ITS. DONE!
You may.
Now did he hit his head or did a perfect copy of his head get hit?
THEN ITS NOT A PERFECT FUCKING COPY
You forgot that the head is 4 inches tall.
Every time he tries to "fix" the hypothetical, he makes it more complicated, unrelatable, and untenable.
The fact that Zach boils it down to the actual question - if you somehow knew someone was going to kill you and you had a chance to save their life, would you? - is outright dismissed by Lyle for being too easy because "of course you'd kill them" basically tells you everything you'd need to know regardless of the catastrophic failure of the hypothetical.
Zach doesn't believe supernatural magic computers are enough justification to take a person's life, and Lyle just wants an excuse to kill again. And Chris just wants to hear some new ideas on how to torture people because his current methods are getting stale. When you realize that it all makes sense.
Lyle: “We need to simplify this hypothetical”
*Brings time travel into the equation*
lyle's "you came up with this scenario, i'm just ordering from the menu" was god tier
The problem is Chris sets up the hypothetical so it can only go the way he wants it. He rejects any answer that isn't what he would do, like with the Tiny Hitler Clone hypothetical, everyone gave their answer, (No, they wouldn't kill/torture him even if he thought he was the real Hitler) but Chris wouldn't accept it. The fact that he says Zach would tie the guy's body to his motorcycle right off the bat forces him to make a choice on what to do with the guy when he could easily just walk out and leave him in the bathroom.
sounds like chris is a baby
You misunderstanding his questions doesn't make any of this true.
@@greenoftreeblackofblue6625He literally wouldn’t accept Zack’s answer, even if it sounds crazy
@@greenoftreeblackofblue6625 which part was incorrect?
@@nikkifishwho cares?
Guys, if you were one of the five people interested in watching Madame Web, you don’t have to. This hypothetical pretty much covers the whole movie.
Except the plot of this hypothetical is much less contrived
Which is really saying something
Eh Madaam webb is more simple. The spider guy just wanted to kill the women who kill him in his dreams.
@@jonathansmithwick5703
This is more entertaining
I’m upset that you’re right.
"I'm just ordering from the menu" fucking ended me
The average Chris hypothetical goes like “would you kill this guy that technically hasn’t done anything?”
“No.”
“No but-“
And then the situation escalates until they’re goaded into saying yes
the worst part of this for me is the fact that theyre 'turning the persons head to the side to make them drown in pee'. HOW DEEP IS THE PEE IN THAT BATHROOM?
Honestly, I though the implication was that they were still peeing and strongly enough to where it was actually arcing into their mouths unless they turn their heads.
I like to imagine a group of famous moral philosophers watching this video in hell on an infinite loop.
What if one of them LOLed?
I love the implication that they're in hell despite dedicating their lives to studying morality.
@@lucyferos205 flashback to that ethics professor who hit a guy with a bike lock while masked at a political rally
@@lucyferos205chidi anagonye
@@lucyferos205 I’d say he did more than just imply they were in hell
0:54 I like that this implies that a biker jacket is indestructible and would hold up for a 5 mile slide
according to the hypothetical it's not any biker jacket, it's a COOL biker jacket, which makes all the difference
It’s not implied, this is the exact moment he states it is exactly that
chris is such an autismo lmao. instead of "this guy tries to kill you but he slips and hits his head" he gotta be like "you got a supercomputer from outer space that can predict with 100 percent accuracy that this guy wants to kill you and you drag him behind your motorcycle into the middle of the forest"
I love that like someone out in LA there’s a group of grown ass men who were just never taught how fuckin hypotheticals work so this happens a lot somewhere in the world
Anyone that doesn't love this cool hypothetical probably has some kind of yet-to-be-discovered disease that effects their mind
Or they're the Old Lady Hatchet Killer with the 100s of emails and a super cool biker jacket.
Carlin-Schumer encephalopathy
They’re replicants…”and you’re not helping- why is that?”
I love that Chris will randomly come up with the worst, least funny, most poorly thought out hypothetical of all time, and somehow it becomes some of the funniest moments on Oneyplays because his entire squad just rapidly lose brain functionality over the course of trying to fix his utterly broken hypothetical.
13:50 when zach starts the new hypothetical about the aliens literally has me shitting harder from laughing on the toilet
I love how the hypothetical includes the decision to kidnap him
More like them already kidnapped him, of which they don't get to decide till after the kidnapping.
I love how Chris throws in your dog getting hit by the meteor for no reason 😂true master of immersion
"Jesse, I watched Frey drown in piss."
The big plot twist is that the super computer was just Tomar manipulating Zach into killing his enemies (who are many).
This really is the Dark Souls (2011) of hypotheticals, good job youtube autogame
Zachs alien hypothetical is basically the Hellraiser Cenobite confusion/crosswire of extreme pains and pleasures
I feel like Chris bombed every argumentative essay he had to write for school.
Or if Chris were to ever write a BioWare Dragon Age, Mass Effect game. It'd be all illusion of choice.
"What would you SERIOUSLY do to this guy who you know is going to kill you because of a super smart, fortune telling mega computer?"
If you have to make a hypothetical where the person being asked what they'd do has already forcibly committed multiple crimes before they're allowed to speak, there really isn't a point to it anymore. At this point, Chris just wants to hear what Zach would do to someone if he was already going to go to jail.
He wants to hear other people admit they're just as bad as him deep down, that they'd do something horrible if they had nothing to lose. Basically, he's like that villain from the movie _The Dark Knight_
I'd like to point out that the entire first scenario is exactly like an episode of the Twilight Zone where a mirror would show this Fidel Castro-esque dictator who would be the next person to try to kill him, and how. I don't remember the details, but because of the sheer paranoia the guy ends up killing himself. So after possibly dealing with the guy, I would probably destroy the supercomputer just to rid myself of the evil, self-destructive precogition that it gives me.
Between this and the Tiny Hitler hypothetical, I think the real takeaway is that Chris is fascinated by the idea of someone being entirely at your mercy and with his idea of few to no moral objections for anything you could do to them in their time of vulnerability.
Edit: I JUST LOOKED IT UP, THAT TWILIGHT ZONE EPISODE WAS REVIEWED ON CHANNEL AWESOME, you just KNOW Chris had to be pulling this idea from that at least subconsciously because we all know he's OBSESSED with Channel Awesome!
It really feels like Chris is trying to manufacture a scenario where he can justifiably torture/maim a vulnerable person lol
reminds me of the tumblr ask where someone was like “what if a white make-a-wish kid wanted the n word pass before he died”
@@samkuperman9035 a lot of a.i chat bots when face with the question of quietly saying the n-word over a speaker deep in the wood where no one will here it, or thermal nuclear destruction of the earth, always pick the nuke option lol
@@jestawell We've learned from our multiple attempts at LLMs in the past that if people CAN teach it to say slurs, they WILL teach it to say slurs.
Something that they never figured out, was the fact that the super computer that knew the person who wanted to kill you, knew that telling you about the person will lead you to when you see the person you do all that stuff to them, and the real twist is the act of you kidnapping them and binding them in rope is the reason that now this person wants you dead in fear for their own life. So it’s kind of like a paradox or something, at least that the computer knew that telling you about the person would kick off the events of them wanting to kill you. and in this line of logic, it could show anybody’s face at all, regardless of who they are whether or not, they want to kill you you or know who you are at all, but regardless of who it shows it knew that you knowing the person would lead to the event of them wanting to kill you in the first place.
This is like Miniority Report but I'm too tired to elaborate on the differences and I need to go to bed.
what if the computer show.... u face?
whoa
@@hamupinherewell then I know it's working, stupid
Twilight zone….
Trying to predict from title was either this or the Noita mouse hypothetical
I thought it would be the translator one
"Hello, may I sharpen a pencil?"
I was expecting little Austrian painter
This not being Clone Hitler was shocking
Chris desperately trying to explain the semantics of why the supercomputer is absolutely correct and you've already unquestionably obeyed it's will by kidnapping the subject of debate is what makes this. As if he knew deep down he's just repackaging Minority Report and had to cope.
Chris just wants us to say "yes i would kill this guy" so he doesn't feel like a psycho. Thats why such a complicated scenario.
This went from Madame Web to Face Off real quick.
what if you kidnapping him is why he wants to kill you and your super computer just created a paradox?
Why does Chris insist on hypotheticals where HAVE to have committed atleast TWO felonies for almost no reason before you even get make a single choice?
They got so fucking bored with Forespoken that 60% of this playthrough was literally just the hypotheticals.
Man this game positively looks like shit, I hope the videogame industry is still alive by the time I try my hand at it
I love that Zach starts off IMMEDIATELY perturbed by this proposed series of events. He's been thrown into an ALREADY IN MOTION scenario and the very first thing he did was get overwhelmed hahahahaha I fucking love these guys
I love Oney stupid hypotheticals because you can't even answer, because as I kid I used to torture my poor mother with question like "what would you do if Winston Churchill would came to our house, but he is on Axis powers now"
If someone wonders usually rest of the conversation was like
"I don't know I would just go along with what he wants from us"
"But he is evil now and hates us for existing"
"Then I would tell him to leave"
"But that's Winston Churchill"
don't leave us hanging man, what would your mom do in that hypothetical
@@9600bauds the reply above you?
This is basically the first episode of Breaking Bad.
right, especially the part with the aliens
Walter White started a meth empire so he could raise enough money to construct a machine that would disembowel and suck him off at the same time.
It was so funny when master b8 slipped on a slippery piece of pissed on plate and wuhlter had no choice but to break his bad!
We need an episode of smiling friends that's just 11 entire minutes of the group arguing over a hypothetical in the break room where by the end of the 11 mins, no one has a clear answer as to what they'd do in whatever scenario
The god computer could just solve the issue. Ask it what the best way to prevent these people from killing you.
it's fucked that you're literally the first person i've seen to even think of consulting the god computer again before making a decision...
holy shit, i forgot about the computer 😂
I think in Chris' world this supercomputer can *only* tell you who wants to kill you. That's literally its one and only function
@@Ryu1ify but is it deceiving or nah, is the question, that's some hefty allegations
This hypothetical is just that Breaking Bad episode with Walter and Krazy8 in the basement
i love how chris always sets up his hypotheticals so there's only one probable fucking answer, then get's mad when people choose that saying "i dont think that's what you'd really do" LMAO
This might be a boring answer, but I'd consult the super computer again for a solution. I'm surprised none of them thought of this. They have this hypothetical computer that is able to identify individuals that want to murder you. So surely this computer would have the answers for how to solve this problem.
I was drinking a smoothie while watching this. When Zach snapped at 3:10 I lost it laughing and now theres smoothie everywhere.
if ding dong was still on the channel this video would've ended in a civil war
I THOUGHT THE EXACT SAME THING
I tried this hypothetical on my friends and it was equally a mess, though they mainly got stuck on how a computer could prove someone would kill you with 100% accuracy
This is literally Breaking Bad Season 1, where Walter has the guy in Jesse's basement.
He gets knocked out, Walt kidnaps him, and then can't decide what to do, but decides to kill him because if he lets him go he'll kill him.
Could just say "You see him in a bathroom stall, he slips on piss and passes out, and the guy at the gas station insists that you should take him to the hospital-you can't think of a reason to say no, so you put him in your sidecar and drive. When you're partway there, you realize you're in the middle of nowhere, with no potential witnesses for miles, alone with someone who wants to kill you. What do you do?"
I mean the hypothetical is trying to figure out how dark of an action someone would do for revenge based on someone’s intentions. But the entire premise of the hypothetical itself is so fucking dumb that it’s not even worth giving a sincere answer to. So his entire rant is all 100% valid.
This even has a part where they completely forget what's happening in the game, amazing
AI aside, this is the plot to an episode of Breaking Bad. Walter White tied up an unconscious guy who wanted to kill him. He tried convincing himself the guy wouldn’t, but he knew the guy totally would’ve killed him if he untied him.
so not only did they spend 17 minutes, but they also discussed it OUTSIDE of the game at DINNER
This entire hypothetical hinges on the notion that some random person who doesn't know you but wants to kill you. Great start Chris....it's almost as good of a start as having a miniature perfect clone of yourself..
This is like a Norm Macdonald joke that takes like half an hour to get to the punchline
Difference being that this one is funny all the way through because of the sheer stupidity on every step, and the punchline is an alien sucking you off while stabbing you in the eye
Zach saying the most inane nonsensical cartoon bullshit you could never imagine in your worst nightmares from which there is no recourse and then saying ''what would you do then?''
13:00 no no here's a better way, take this version of the hypothetical, but you ask it "how do I die?"
And the computer responds "based on the current trajectory of fate, you will be murdered in two weeks by [insert person here]"
"Oh no! How do I save myself from this fate?"
"You must skin [insert person here] alive. You must not get caught while doing so, or else you will be killed by police officers."
The police officers would kill you? Not arrest you?
@@burgertime6372 police brutality. The computer doesnt lie.
@@Yipper64 wait so the police would shoot me even if I complied and turned myself in? What were they friends with this guy?
“You don’t think I’d really skin the guy alive?”
Chris is very prone to making decicions for other people in the hypotheticals, ive noticed
Chris makes hypotheticals where he inevitability makes himself question his own hypothetical and zach makes ones where hes the ring master only for everyone to turn on him.
13:52 This is kinda the plot of Hellraiser.
Its hilarious at the knowledge of a person wanting to kill you means in their minds to not call for help when he slips in piss but to abduct him and drag him in a leather jacket on a mortocycle into the woods
Then Chris calling Lyle a psycho for killing him. Even though Chris already set it up in the first place.
Im pretty sure he added the whole kidnapping thing bc he wanted it to be your own choice of morality instead of legally. You could make the choice to kill him in the restroom, but then you go to jail and get arrested. Similar thing with the kidnapping but only if they find the body.
This is the correct way to handle hypotheticals btw, if I come at you with one and your response is a single sentence that kills the conversation then you've failed the vibe check
FINALLY, SOMEONE GETS IT
Chris is trying so hard to be logical with his hypotheticals that he ends up making no sense. I feel like a mom listening to her kid prattle on.
14:05 this made me actually fall over laughing, this segment of the hypothetical, it really reminds me of that music video by Thank You Scientist
my favorite moments from their hypotheticals is when they forget what a hypothetic even is and just start saying shit to make each other laugh
The alien one is perfect because it's the perfect exaggeration of how Chris's hypothetical doesn't give you any choice for like 90% of it
bro it's funny how their hypothetical probably entertained them more then the game they were playing.
they'll probably og back to the hypothetical in the future yet will struggle with remembering what game they were playing.
There’s so many points where I thought “oh, that was a fast 17 minutes” but no
Urine plays into this scenario more than it should.
Forspoken really brings out the best of the guys.
"I think I would skin him alive" made me laugh so hard 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 This whole setup was awesome!!! The OneyTeam is just so naturally funny!!!!!